"I want all you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ to take note. Take note, this pitch get up to 1.3.2 million miles per hour. I call this ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ right here Herpes. You don't wanna throw this pitch, I never throw this pitch, this pitch is BANNED. You cannot throw Herpes and get away with it. This pitch is BANNED. I lost my scholarship throwing this pitch. I don't like to throw it but I-I would never throw it. One of my homeboys threw this pitch, he did 10 YEARS in the county prison waiting for trial. You cannot throw this pitch. Herpes goes like this, you hold it like this, you want to hold your leg a hunnid degrees, you wanna come up, you hold it for 9 minutes, and then you release. Hundred. 9 minutes. Up. You pop. You cannot throw this pitch in college. You cannot throw this ♥♥♥♥♥♥' pitch, this pitch is BANNED. You cannot throw Herpes. Herpes is ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ banned- you don't wanna throw this pitch. You do not wanna throw it." - Plato

"Dude frying my tendies at the raising cane's has the black nitrile gloves over the hairy forearms this is not good. Puppy's leaking. The situation in my Target boxer briefs is gonna go from Gushers to Go-Gurt real fast here. I'm so horny I deserve to have copper wire snaked through my teeth." - Abraham Lincoln

"Hello, I noticed you have a profile picture of a very beautiful (but also intelligent looking!) female, and I am under the presumption that this goddess is you? It is quite astonishing to see a female here in the Valorant LFG. I am quite popular around here in this server, so if you require and guidance, please, throw me a mention. I will assist you at any hour, day or night. And, before you are mistaken, I do not seek your hand in a romantic way; although, I am not opposed in the event you are interested in me, as many women often are. I am a man of standard, and I do not bow to just any female that comes my way, unlike my peers... So rest assured that I will not be in the way of your gaming and socializing experience. Consider me ur jett? .. a companion, a partner, and perhaps we can enjoy some video games together some time. I see you play valorant, and are you good at playing sage? I am a peak gold 3, so I would be happy to help you rank up. Platonically of course, unless you (like many others) change your mind on that. I look forward to our future together (as friends of course.)" - Mahatma Gandhi

"I made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgement, and I don’t expect to be forgiven. I’m simply here to apologize. What we came across that day in the woods was obviously unplanned. The reactions you saw on tape were raw; they were unfiltered. None of us knew how to react or how to feel. I should have never posted the video. I should have put the cameras down and stopped recording what we were going through. There's a lot of things I should have done differently but I didn't. And for that, from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. I want to apologize to the internet. I want to apologize to anyone who has seen the video. I want to apologize to anyone who has been affected or touched by mental illness, or depression, or suicide. But most importantly I want to apologize to the victim and his family. For my fans who are defending my actions, please don't. I don’t deserve to be defended. The goal with my content is always to entertain; to push the boundaries, to be all-inclusive. In the world I live in, I share almost everything I do. The intent is never to be heartless, cruel, or malicious. Like I said I made a huge mistake. I don’t expect to be forgiven, I’m just here to apologize. I'm ashamed of myself. I’m disappointed in myself. And I promise to be better. I will be better. Thank you." - Shigeru Miyamoto