Hey everyone. My birthday was yesterday and...not gonna lie. It's been a rough end of year. A lot of great things have happened: I got to work for the mouse in one of the best jobs I've ever had, I got into a master's degree for a program that'll improve on my base bachelor's, and I've been here on Newgrounds for almost five years now, and survived to 24 (yippee). However, I find myself struggling to keep making music as much as I used to. I still want to, but my self-consciousness has been an issue of course, and life in general has just been....how's the best word to describe it. Bleak? This year at least.

I was recently watching a video by one of my favorite Twitch Streamers, ThermCantRead (or Therm on Youtube), where he uploaded a full music album in a month. Its an interesting challenge and yet I feel like I can't compete with it. Its really good, you should go watch it.

But then I realized something.

I haven't been consistently uploading in 3 years now and I feel kind of guilty about it. Like I should be posting more here, and not that I don't want to. But I feel like I've been..disappointing my followers for not posting enough? I really appreciate everyone here for supporting me as always and maybe it seems a little selfish, but...should I do a challenge like that? Even when I feel like it might be too much for me? Or should I go with my gut and only compose when I've got an idea. Because I do still get ideas, I just have the self-consciousness to never continue composing or finish enough to post them. (I'm working on it...I've got a lot I still want to do.)

Either way, support would help. Doesn't have to be advice, but it would help to reach out for a little support every now and again. Thanks everyone for being here in my times of need, and in my great times of success. I'm so happy here and I hope to always do my best making music for you all. Once again, thank you <3