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Anon Stops A School Shooting

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0% found this document useful (0 votes)
81 views716 pages

Anon Stops A School Shooting

Uploaded by

adriansksky
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as TXT, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd

1.

First Day of School

“January sixth.”

“Year 201M2020 BC.”

“Volcaldera Bluffs.”

“Weather conditions; cold as balls.”

“It’s my first time living close to water.”

“The idea of ‘marine layer’ is new to me, but I do understand morning mist.”

“This was like it, except infinitely more shitty.”

“The heavy fog makes navigating to my new school more difficult as I fail to see
anything five feet in front of me.”

“Like a runt of a tree planted in the sidewalk that I swerve to avoid.”

“It’s my first time having to walk to school too.”

“My new apartment is in an awkward spot. Opposite side of town, yet no school or
public bus to take me from there.”

“It’s my first day at a new school.”

“It’s the second half of the first semester of senior year.”

“I had six months left at my old school.”

“I can’t even imagine the kind of hell those six months would have been.”

“But this…”

“I should take my mind off that.”

“I whip out my phone, and consider the best way to make people upset online.”
>>False choice

>Reply to the obvious shill thread

>Bait the obvious underaged poster

''The thread goes 404 right as I'm ready to post my well thought-out reply.”

“Better hide my phone before someone sees fit to take it from me, the only human
around town. I think."

“It’s the sounds that reach me first. The chatter of people milling about.”

???(Sage) “Bro…”

???(Rosa) “It’s been too long!”

???(Stella) “It was only three weeks *Giggle*”

“I can make out the building now.”

“The fog shrouding gives the school an ominous vibe to it.”

“I look at the name written on the arch over the entrance.”

“Volcano High.”

A “Perfect setting for a horror game. Or maybe a shitty WAD.”

“The attempt at humouring myself just made me feel more alone.”

“A check of my phone says I’m half an hour early.”

“Wonderful.”

“I move to the entrance, only to see all of the steps occupied by students.”

“Their eyes turn to me. Expressions of confusion and contemplation. I can feel
their judging stares, the same that had haunted me for four months previous.”
“I can already picture what they’re thinking.”

??? "Dude, check it out!"

??? “Is that a skinnie?”

??? “Where’s his spear? Aren’t they all like, spear chuckers or something?”

??? “Bet he eats his own kind.”

--??? “Shit, better steer clear of any cars.”

"They probably see me as some kind of circus attraction and nothing more.”

“Ha, I’m the freakshow among this cereal box mascot crowd.”

(Scrolling Staircase CG here)

"Taking acid is not nearly as colorful as going to Volcano High, I should write
that down."

"As I write '’write that down'' on my phone’s note app, I noticed the surrounding
students stopped looking at me, which is good."

"I can peep around the friend circles without a problem now.”

“Not like I'll ever be a part of one anyway."

"?"

(CG of Fang)

"Talk about wanting to stand out, I never thought it was possible to look like you
were from a black and white twenties cartoon."

"She does differ from the other technicolor students though..."

"...in the worst way possible."


"O-oh yeah. She's staring at me..."

"...with that look. Fucking hell."

"Has she never seen a human in her life?"

"I fucking hate that look."

“Contempt. Judging.”

"Everyone that has looked at me like that never proved to be anything more than an
asshole.

“Like I'M the anomaly here. She's just as dumb and insufferable as the rest of
them."

"She’s probably no better than me, miss ''my snout is so big I can land a plane on
it''.”

“Go back to your friends."

(CG of Fang turning back to her friends)

"Huh. She did. I feel like I should say something."

"I notice that all this time my knees were weak and my arms were heavy --and I
think I imagined a whole lifetime with that weird winged girl--."

“My feet carry me over the soggy grass as I look for somewhere else to be.”

“On the side of the building is where I find sanctuary.”

“It’s a small alcove of sorts.”

“The pavement is cracked to bits and the shrubs surrounding it are overgrown.”

“Even the bench, cracked paint on rotted wood held between two concrete legs,
matched the ‘abandoned’ vibe of the place.”

“It was perfect.”


“I flop down on the wet bench and the violent crack from it makes my heart drop.”

“Almost perfect but good enough.”

“I feel a tightness in my chest, and my lungs fight to draw air in.”

“Head in my hands I can fully understand what I’ve done now.”

“Six months in a new school.”

“A year on my own in some rundown apartment in a town I know nothing about.”

“All on my own.”

“Three weeks.”

“It took a day for me to want to change schools, and three weeks to make it
happen.”

“And this is my life now for the next year. I think back to my old man’s
ultimatum.”

Dad “Once the lease is done, Anon, either college or the service.”

Dad “I don’t care which.”

???(Naomi) “Would you happen to be Anon?”

“I look up. The bench breaks down.”

“I lay on the ground, ass hurt from hitting jagged concrete and splintered wood.”

“Thank God for jeans.”

??? “Oh my goodness! Are you okay?”

“I groan.”

A “Never better.”
“I instinctively apply my ‘chill guy’ facade in the presence of strangers to hide
how uneasy I am today.”

“A hand is held over my face. In my pain addled confusion I shake it.”

???(Naomi) “Naser!”

???(Naser) “Right, right.”

“The hand tightens around my own and pulls roughly.”

“The force is enough for my feet to get under me, stumbling back up to stand before
the pair of strangers.”

“It also felt like enough force to pull my arm out of its socket.”

A “Uh… Sup?”

Nas “You’re Anon, yeah?”

??? “I’m so glad we found you!”

A “... Who are you guys? And why do you know my name?”

??? “Where are my manners! My name is Naomi, student council president and your
guide. It’s my sincere pleasure to make your acquaintance Anon!”

Nas “We’re your welcoming committee.”

A “O-kay then.”

“Is that really necessary?”

N “I had this prepared just for you!”

“The orange one, Naomi hands me a brochure.”

“Volcano High and You. A new beginning to adulthood.”

“The title alone makes me gag.”


“She looks at me expectantly.”

“The brochure is full of the typical trivialities.”

“College prep, studying tips, after school programs.”

“None of it matters.”

Nas “Babe, I’ve got some things to take care of.”

“Naser looks back to the school entrance.”

“I follow his eyes and see some people trying to lift a large speaker up the stairs
of the school.”

N “O-oh.”

N “I’ll see you at lunch, right Naser?”

“She looks dejected.”

Nas “*chuckles* Of course.”

“Naser pulls her into a hug and nudges his muzzle against hers.”

“Is that how dinos kiss?”

“He leaves, running quickly to assist with the heavy sound equipment.”

N “Ahem.”

“I turn back to Naomi. She smiles again, though there is a plasticity to it.”

N “So, Anon, why did you transfer here?”

“The question catches me off guard.”

“I freeze like a deer caught in headlights, scrambling to come up with any


plausible answer.”
“It’s an innocent question, she can’t have known, could she?”

“What did mom and pop put in the transfer request form when they shipped my ass
here?”

A “Uh… I…”

N “You uh, don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

“I focus my attention on the brochure out of embarrassment.”

“Lunch! Right! I’m getting kinda hungry! What about something to eat?”

“Yadda yadda, herbivore, vegan, tofu, disgusting…”

“Wait, hold on…”

“Carnivore line, Filet Mignon- what the fuck is wrong with this school?!”

A “Is there a soup kitchen or something around here?”

N “Oh dear... Anon, are you in need of financial assistance?”

--N “What’s a borderline destitute like you doing in a school like this?”

A “I can figure things out on my own, don’t worry too much about it.”

N “Oh, the school here has programs to help it’s less fortunate students!”

N “The principal here is great, come on, I’ll take you to him!”

“The absolute last thing I want to be doing is asking for handouts…”

A “Actually, I-”

Naomi grabs my hand and…”

“…”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

“ALERT”

“ALERT”

“DEFCON LEVEL ONE! DEFCON LEVEL ONE!”

“FEMALE MAKING PHYSICAL CONTACT”

“DO NOT PANIC”

“DO NOT PANIC”

“GET A GRIP ON THE SITUATION”

“THIS IS NAOMI.”

“SHE’S TAKING ME SOMEWHERE BY THE HAND HAND HAND HAND”

“SHE ALREADY HAS A BOYFRIEND DOESN’T SHE?”

“WAIT”

“SHE ALREADY HAS A BOYFRIEND”

“I AM SAFE.”

“Okay, okay. Just stay silent and don’t make a mess of things.”

“……”

“It’s so soft, and smooth, and surprisingly warm for scales.”

“How lewd.”

“Day one and I’ve already fallen to such depraved lows as handholding.”

N “Here we are Anon. Principal Spears should be able to help with your money
situation.”
“Huwhat.”

“Oh. Right.”

“Naomi knocks on the door.”

???(Spears) “State your business!”

N “The new student needs financial help, Principal Spears.”

Sp “Lend him a five!”

N “I think he means the loan program, sir.”

Sp “Tell him to come in later, I’m dealing with another student.”

???(Fang) “-THE FUCKING HELL DO YOU MEAN I HAVE TO CLEAN UP AFTER?!”

N “Tsk.”

“The orange parasaurolophus’ expression quickly changes from… whatever that was to
that same smile she’s had up until now.”

N “Well Anon, why don’t I show you to class? Home room should be starting soon.”

“Right. Home room. I take out my crumpled schedule from my pocket.”

“Naomi takes the slip from me.”

“And blows my eardrums out with a squeal capable of shattering glass.”

N “We share first period and english together! Come on, I’ll introduce you to the
class and you’ll be able to make all sorts of new friends!”

“Yay me.”

“I follow after her to a classroom on the 2nd floor. The seats are being filled
with students. I take one near the front, knowing I’ll have to introduce myself.
I’ll probably be doing that for all my classes.”
“Fuck my life.”

“The artificial ring of a bell blares from a speaker on the wall. With it everyone
waits as the teacher finally enters the room and shuts the door.”

Mr. Tsuki “Ohayo gozaimasu curassu. Tudei yu habu e niu curassu-meito tsu Borukeino
Hai.”

“What.”

Mr. Tsuki “Anon-kun puriizu camu appu zen intorudiusu yooru serfu.”

“Naomi coughs and makes a subtle nod up.”

“OH!”

“I stood from my seat and faced the class. Once again all eyes on me and the
tightness in my chest returns. I inhale deep, willing my erratic heart to slow.”

A “Hey…”

“Again those eyes, just like three weeks ago.”

A “My name is Anon. I uh…”

“Just like every day for the past four months.”

A “I don’t really have any hobbies.”

“I wanted to flee. Hide away. Anything to avoid those judging eyes.”

N “Why did you transfer here?”

“My throat clenches. It’s an innocent question. But I think back again to it all.”

A “uh… I…”

“There’s whispers now. The hushed tones, silenced snickers, blending with the
everpresent stares. My heart hammers at my chest and I am sure that they all can
hear it. See the cold chill racing over me.”
Mr. T “Anon-kun, yuu du natto habu tsu ansaa zattu”

“His words snap me out of my trance. Only Naomi was looking at me. The rest were
preoccupied.”

“Either talking about their winter break. Or catching up on sleep.”

“They’d all ignored me.”

“They’ve all been ignoring me the entire time.”

Mr. T “Puriizu retaano tsu yo shiito, Anon-kun. Hai, nao curassu-”

“That was nothing like my Japanese animes.”

“Mr. Tsuki continued on, drawing what little attention there was to himself. I sat
down, finally feeling the blood that had caught in my legs rush up, leaving me
lightheaded.”

“And I probably have to do this for each class today?”

“Double fuck my life.”

“Awkward introduction after awkward introduction to classmates that couldn’t care


less kept me anxious the whole morning.”

“And there’s still the rest of the day to go.”

“Eventually, lunch comes around.”

“All the edible stuff is well outside my price range of fucking free, so I settle
for a pseudopizza.”

“The kind that becomes a viable weapon if you leave it alone for ten minutes.”

“No time to waste after exiting the line, I scan the lunchroom for an open seat.”

“I thought I had found a decent spot in the corner when disaster struck.”

“Said disaster was a hand grabbing my shoulder and turning me about.”


“My plate of pizza shaped cardboard threatened to smear across my shirt.”

“I fought the momentum of the tray until the hand that had spun me stabilized it
and me.”

Nas “Whoa there! Nearly dropped your food Anon.”

A “Yeah, whose fault is that?”

Nas ”...Yours?”

“I swear to all that is good and holy.”

Nas ”Wanna sit with us?”

“What?”

Nas ”Wanna sit with Naomi and me? Since you’re new and all.”

“He points to a table where the living pink sugar rush is waving.”

“God damn it.”

“I don’t want to make a scene.”

A “Suuuure…”

“Before I even sit down the barrage of questions begins.”

N “SO! What do you think of Volcano High? How about your classes? You seem-”

“I just shake my head and start not paying attention.”

Nas “You looking forward to the rest of the day?”

A “Not really.”

A “All these introductions, you know?”


Nas “I get you, hard to talk to people you don’t know, right?”

A “Something like that, yeah.”

A “Hell, last period I tripped in front of everyone. Talk about a first


impression.”

Nas “I don’t think they’d care too much.”

N “Have you had any trouble since then? Do you have enough money for food today?”

Nas “Oh, you’re short on food money man?”

“I perk up at Naser’s interjection. Naomi looks disappointed for a second.”

A “Not really, just had to sign up for some handouts.”

“Naomi is starting to look disappointed I’m only picking up on Naser’s


interjections”

Nas “If you need a bit more extra chow, there’s going to be free refreshments at my
si-- uh…’’

Nas “At Fang’s concert after school today”

A “Your what?”

Nas “Fang”

A “Your brother or….?”

Nas “...Sibling.”

“What.”

Nas “Fang’s gonna have some extra pizzas for the show. You could take some home.”

A “I uh... dunno about concerts. Not really one for public events like that.”

Nas “Alright man, just thought you could use a few opportunities to make friends.”
“What was that?”

“I’ll pretend that wasn’t meant to be malicious.”

A “I’ll consider it.”

N “Hey! Don’t leave me out of the conversation!”

N “How about I help you pick out some cheap food after school?”

N “I know some great vegan shops in the area!”

“My stomach roils at the V-word.”

A “Maaaaybe another time, sorry. So about that concert Naser?”

“Dinner and a show? Sign me the fuck up.”

A “So what do they play?”

Nas “Music.”

A “Music?”

Nas “Yes.”

A “What kind?”

Nas “The kind you listen to.”

A “Wh- Well what genre?”

Nas “The good kind?”

A “You don’t know, do you.”

Nas “Nope.”

“Well, free food is free food. Sign me the fuck up”


“I look at my pizza, noticing something is wrong.”

“I test it with my plastic spork and watch the cheap utensil shatter to bits.”

“I curse life for a third time today.”

“The dreaded ten-minute mark has passed, rendering my ‘pizza’ only useful as
building material.”

N “Oh dear. Naser why don’t you split your sandwich with him?”

Nas “But it’s my sandwich!”

N “It’s fine, we can split my vegan TLT!”

“Naser shudders and looks at his own footlong philly sub longingly.”

Nas “S-sure thing, babe.”

“He tears the sandwich in two and hands me the larger half.”

Nas “Here, Anon.”

“I will never forget your brave sacrifice.”

“With that we all dig into our meal.”

“...”

“--After school--”

“My classes after lunch were the same as before it.”

“By now I had a rehearsed introduction that only the teacher cared about.”

“My classmates were disinterested and I would sit down to be forgotten.”

“I hope the rest of the year is just like that.”


“I just want to skate through it all.”

“All that’s left for today is the concert. And dinner.”

“I wait outside the auditorium entrance with Naser, who was checking his phone for
messages.”

Nas “Right, Fang says the show is starting in a bit. See?”

“Naser turns the screen to me.”

“Fang: Piss off.”

“Fang: Is the pizza here?”

“Fang: You can have a slice”

“Fang: But after that you GTFO FWR”

A “FWR? Like, Franklin W. Roosevelt?”

Nas “Nah. Fucked wing retard. Fang’s words, not mine.”

A “Is your uh… sibling always like this?”

Nas “Fang’s....”

“I wait for him to continue.”

Nas “Well um…”

Nas “I mean, kinda?”

A “Glad I’m an only child.”

“Naser glares at me.”

Nas “Fang’s still family.”

A “Ah, sorry. Just saying is all.”


“Naser deflates.”

Nas “You’re good, Anon. And yeah, they’re family but Fang’s just so… so…”

A “Difficult?”

Nas “YES! Difficult! And I don’t know why.”

A “Sounds rough.”

Nas “It is. Like, I know sh- THEY care but Fang doesn’t even wanna be around me.”

A “Hmmm.”

“Finally the doors open and I smell the cheesy, heart clogging goodness within.”

Nas “Sweet. Come on, Anon.”

“A caveman of a man holds open the door for everyone.”

??? “Wait.”

“His massive hand stops me.”

A “A-ah. Y-yes?”

“I’m guided to the side, away from the crowd that’s filtering into the auditorium.”

??? “So how are you finding our lovely school, Anon?”

A “Uh…”

“It’s the spear-shaped pin on his lapel that reads ‘principal’ that informs me of
who this giant is.”

A “O-oh! It’s uh… nice? Cleaner than my old school.”

“He guffaws and slaps his chest.”


Sp “You can thank your classmates for that.”

“What?”

Sp “Now, go enjoy the show.”

A “Yes sir.”

Sp “Oh, I do need you to come by my office tomorrow for some paperwork.”

“I nod and go back to the door where Naser is standing, holding it open for the
last of the audience to go inside.”

“Naser leads me and the large crowd into the shitty school theater.”

“The foyer has tables with boxes of pizzas stacked taller than me.”

Nas “You can take a couple boxes after, Anon. That should help ya out.”

A “Who the hell got all these anyway?”

Nas “I did.”

“I take a box down from the stack. Others have already started stacking their
plates.”

“I check the logo on the box.”

A “And to get so many larges from…’’Dino-moe’s Pizza”?”

A “That’s a couple hundred bucks though.”

Nas “Meh, ‘bout a month’s allowance.”

“A month? That explains that disaster of a jacket.”

A “So about the actual show-”

Nas “I’ll check on them. Be right back.”


“Left on my own I stack my plate up with some quality grease topped delight.”

“I lean against the wall, chewing bits of supreme and observing the rest of the
crowd.”

??? “-nother shitshow-”

??? “She’s so stupid-”

??? “-they even bother?”

??? “Bunch of losers-”

“Everyone seems to share the same sentiment.”

“So why the hell did they even show up for this?”

“Naser finally comes back and opens the door to the main hall.”

“The crowd moves in, though I hang back so I can talk with Naser.”

A “What’s with them, Naser?”

Nas “What do you mean?”

A “The crowd. They were talking mad shit.”

Nas “What?!”

“Naser grasps at the air unsure what to think or do at the moment. I think he’s
angry”

(Naser bangs the table, there is no text or indication on screen, only a loud
banging noise and a screen shake)

A “Whoa whoa.”

Nas “Ugh, I should’ve known.”

A “I don’t, what are you talking about man?”


Nas “I brought them here so Fang has an audience.”

A “Oh.”

“Naser’s phone rings. He moves aside to answer it.”

Nas “Fa-”

“The voice on the other end is loud and shrill.”

Nas “Yeah I-”

“He holds the phone away from his ear to save his eardrum.”

Nas “Okay okay I-”

“The call ends and Naser sags.”

Nas “I’ve gotta leave.”

A “Seriously?”

Nas “Yeah, Fang doesn’t want me here. Said I’ll ruin the show.”

“Harsh.”

Nas “Look, whatever happens promise you won’t hold this against them.”

Nas “They're actually a really a nice person once you get to know them”

A “Naser why did you just murder the english language in cold blood?”

“Within I see the rest of the audience, huddled in groups around tiny snack
tables.”

Nas “Even went to the trouble of switching out the seats for them. Naomi said it’d
help.”

“With a huff Naser turns away, begrudgingly leaving the auditorium.”


“I enter the hall and take a seat in the back, away from the rest of the crowd.”

“The lights dim and the curtains are drawn open.”

“Onstage is a trio of people my age.”

“I think Fang is the drummer? He doesn’t look related to Naser, maybe it is the
main front-woman?”

“That must be Naser’s sister.”

A “Wh-”

“Then why the whole confusion over her sex? For fuck’s sake.”

“I’m just getting thrown around today. I don’t know.”

“She looks familiar”.

“The band doesn’t bother introducing themselves.”

“Instead the purple one begins plucking her bass.”

“It all went tumbling down from there.”

“What I thought was a guitar sounded horrifically wrong, far too heavy.”

“The lead guitarist was using a fucking bass.”

“And then the vocals kicked in.”

“It’s horrific screeching, combined with the amelodious shredding on a bass created
a cacophony equal to hundreds of cats ritualistically sacrificed.”

“I fight the urge to cover my ears.”

“I don’t know too much about music, but even I know that you don’t use two basses
in one band unless you know exactly what you’re doing.”
“Ooooooh nooooooo.”

“Ooooooooh God.”

“What were they thinking?!”

“I looked back to the crowd to gauge their interest.”

“Surely I’m not alone in thinking this is an absolute travesty.”

??? “PFFFT AHAHAHA THEY STILL FUCKING SUCK!!”

(In-CG insult layers)


??? "This music is GREAT!!...for a try not to cringe challenge"

??? "THIS IS THE FUTURE OF MUSIC"

??? "imagine not making a shitty emorock band in 201M2020"

??? "Time for another extinction event."

??? "Just remove the n already"

??? IS THAT THE TUMBLRSAURUS REX?

??? "The worst thing to happen to dinosaurs since their extinction"

??? "Imagine the smell of their clubroom. Jesus Christ"

??? "''I am majoring in art'': The band"


(In-CG insult layers)

“The crowd was standing, jeering and laughing with whoever said that.”

“More words were said but the laughter eclipsed them and the music.”

“Wait, what happened to the music?”

“On-stage, the trio looked panicked.”


“The drummer was inching off stage, while the purple bassist was about to break
down into tears.”

“But the frontwoman stood there. Stood her ground.“

(In-CG insult layers)


??? "Nice pizza but what I really love is the generic lesbian band music playing in
the background!"
(In-CG insult layers)

???(Fang) “FUCK YOU!”

“She tossed her bass aside, raising both hands and proudly displaying a finger on
each of them.”

???(Fang) “FUCK ALL OF YOU!”

??? “NO ONE WOULD WANT TO FUCK YOU, BITCH!”

“Pffft… That struck a chord with her.”

(In-CG insult layers)


??? ''I paid money for THIS?''

??? ''You didn't pay anything.''

??? ''I still feel robbed!''

??? "I'd pay to NOT hear this."


(In-CG insult layers)

“I watch as she grabs her bass and takes the arm of the purple one, rushing off
stage with the pink drummer.”

(In-CG insult layers)


??? "Did Naser get blackmailed? or have we really sunk this low?"

??? "I was gonna say something, but it seems the audience has already done my job
for me."

??? "honestly, it looks like a lot of talent, effort, and love went into making
this music.”
??? “...”

??? “What a waste."

“Oh God I can’t take this, I’m gonna grow a 6 pack from laughing so much, I’m just
gonna grab my pizza and leave”
(In-CG insult layers)

“I turn towards the door and see Principal Spears, a fierce glare freezing me in
place.”

Sp “Anon.”

“Oh fuck”

“His voice is even more stern than this morning.”

A “Yes sir?”

“He looks to the crowd and then to me.”

Sp “I don’t want to hear about any of this come tomorrow.”

Sp “I expect some goddamned maturity from you, Anon.”

Sp “You’ll be an adult once you graduate.”

A “Uh… Why me though?”

Sp “I’ve taught many students, and I can tell these things.”

“His hand lands on my shoulder.”

“It’s grip was firm as it weighed on me.”

Sp “Listen here, Anon. You are not the only person in the world.”

Sp “Everyone’s fighting their own battles.”

“The hand squeezes before pushing me towards the door.”


Sp “I want to see you in my office first thing tomorrow.”

Sp “Now get out of here, this is the only warning that you’ll get from me.”

Sp “Next time it will be campus clean-up.”

“Behind me the principal’s voice shakes the room.”

Sp “WHOSE SORRY ASS AM I GOING TO HAVE TO SUPLEX!”

“Back in the foyer I see some boxes of partially finished pizza left.”

“I consolidate them all into a pair of boxes and make my exit.”

“The sun is starting to set now as I make my way home.”

Sp “You are not the only person in the world.”

“Pfft. Like I don’t already know that. There’s like…”

“The classmates that all ignored me today.”

“Naomi’s annoying ass.”

“That fucking caveman of a principal.”

“Naser, whose been a bro.”

“Naser’s Sis-”

“Oh.”

“Shit.”

“...”

2. Meeting the Band

“-The Next Day-”


“*BLEEP* *BLEEP* *BLEEP* *BLEEP* *BLEEP* *BLEEP* “

“The bane of all sleep echoes violently by my head, swiftly erasing any traces of
slumber.”

“Still without the energy to turn the alarm off, I stare at the ceiling for a bit,
recalling the events of the previous day as an exercise.”

“The school, if you could call it one.


My new friends, if you could call them that.
That band, if you could call it such.”

“Great idea Anon, start the day by dissing everything you've done so far in your
new life.
No wonder you're so damn popular.”

“Finally, I lean out of bed and turn the alarm clock off.”

“I have a good forty-five minutes before I need to be at school, and it takes


twenty to walk.”

“That leaves twenty-five minutes to get ready.”

“With practiced movements I execute a proper combat roll from bed, tackling the
floor and headbutt it into submission.”

“My foe defeated, I groan in victory.”

“My new bed is half the size of what I’m used to.”

“The hardwood (or is it vinyl?) floor is cold as hell.”

“From the purview of the floor, I look around my room again.”

“A tiny one room apartment with only a computer, bed, television, and fridge.”

“A whole year in this shithole.”

“... Guess I gotta take it one day at a time.”

“Picking myself up, I slide into todays’ (and everydays’) clothes and pour myself a
bowl of off-brand cereal I picked up the day before.”

“My eyes scan over my phone while I shovel my sugary breakfast into my mouth.”

“*Scroll*”
“*Crunch*”
“*Scroll*”
“*Crunch*”

“Like a poorly oiled machine until it runs out of fuel with a noisy slurp.”

“Soon enough it's time to leave for school.”

“I grab my backpack and slide it over my shoulders.”

“I take my jacket off the hanger and-“

“…”

“I take off the backpack and put the jacket on.”

“Opening the door blows the cool morning air in my face, and I stop to take a deep
breath.”

“Day two out of however many days are left in the year.
So far so good.”

“I approach the grand building, looking to find a place in line between the other
students trundling into the front doors.”

“The halls before class are as crowded as always, hundreds of students filing in
unison towards their homerooms.”

“By now I was starting to be able to make my way around on autopilot, I've walked
the same path twice already after all.”

“Even after the longest sleep of my life, I still feel miserably tired and ready to
crash once again.”

“I found another entrance at the side of the school that has less students on it.
The less the merrier.”

“I check my clock once again - I’m early. Fucking hell. Should have shitposted a
bit more.”

“Why am I here so early again?”

“Think I had to do something.”

“Oh yeah.”

“I should talk to Naser. Give him my version of events.”

“That way he won’t kick {i}my{/i} ass.”

“Wait.”

“Oh goddamn it.”

“The principal also wanted to see me. Shit, probably gonna get some demerit or
whatever rich schools do as punishment.”

“I had almost forgotten.”

“Please Raptor Jesus just let this be the last time I need to deal with stuff like
this.”

“Get it over with so I can finally just slip my way through this year.”

>>>>Naser’s a bro
>>>>I don’t wanna piss off the caveman.

====>Naser’s a bro

“Principal caveman can wait. I want to apologize to Naser about yesterday…”

“I hope I can be nice to him this time.”

“Great job, Anon!”

“He saves you from soy poisoning by sacrificing his footlong, and how do you repay
him? By laughing at his sister.”

“There he is, I hope he’s not too busy.”


“...”

“I just realized I don’t know what to say to him”

“‘’I wasn’t laughing AT your sister, I was laughing WITH the crowd’’”

“No, that sounds bad”

“‘’Weird sisters, amirite?’’”

“I might be retarded. I just told him I’m an only son yesterday.”

“‘’Can’t help it, dude. Some people just won’t amount to anything in life.
Sorry.’’”

“This isn’t time to be edgy, Anon.”

“As I try and fail to find some way to explain myself to Naser I also fail at
actually finding Naser.”

“How the fuck did I even end up in the tard yard?”

“What feels like a space decade of walking, or really just half an hour I find the
crippled pteradon being accosted by a VERY pissed off purple midget.”

?(T) “-SAID YOU INVITED ALL THOSE ASSHOLES!”

Nas “Wait, Trish, you don’t understand-!”

T “DON’T CUT ME OFF YOU GRAY PIECE OF SHIT!”

“Students are clearing out of the way, just trying to get to their classes.”

“This must be a common occurrence.”

“The diminutive triceratops, Trish, bows her head and charges Naser.”

“He just holds a hand out to her forehead.”


T “GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!!”

Nas “Trish, I’m not going to fight you again.”

Nas “The principal’s already gotten onto me about the lockers from last time.”

Nas “Believe me, I had no idea the concert would have turned out like that.”

T “LIAR!!”

Nas “I just wanted to make sure you guys had an actual audience-”

T “WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?!?”

Nas “You know what I mean, come on...”

T “Argh!”

“She stops trying to gore Naser and throws her arms to her sides.”

T “Screw you!”

T “Even if you weren’t trying to mess with Fang!”

T “Screw! You!”

“She stomps off.”

Nas “{i}*Sigh.*{i\}

A “What was that all about?”

N “Oh, Anon.”

N “Don’t worry about it, it’s nothing.”

Nas “Y’know, girl issues, right? Haha...”

A “Sure…”
A “Sounds like she was grilling you about the concert.”

Nas “...”

N “Some concert, right?”

A “Actually, about that…”

A “I, uhh…”

--pa sound effect

Sp “ANON MOUS, IF YOU ARE NOT IN MY OFFICE WITHIN TEN MINUTES I SWEAR ON MY DEAR
FAMILY I WILL PERSONALLY MOUNT YOU ON MY WALL.”

--pa sound effect

A “...”

“A layer of cold sweat makes its presence known.”

Nas “It can wait, the office is down this hall on the right.”

A “I know the way, but thanks.”

“Naser waves and heads off.”

“Guess it’s to the principal’s office with me. Again.”

“And thinking about him makes me think about last night.”

Sp “You are not the only person in the world.”

“Poor Naser, man. Just wanted to help his sister.”

“But it’s not like he did anything wrong.”

“Just as I reach the office the sound of clinking glass draws my attention to the
apricot asspain and some pink raptor.”
N “Is that contraband, Reed?”

?(Re) “Bro, you’ve known I’m in a band for like, a year now.”

N “No! Contraband! In your backpack!”

Re “Hmmm… nah, I left my games at home.”

“Naomi facepalms, or whatever counts as a facepalm with a snout.”

N “Reed! You have a bong in your backpack!”

Re “...But we aren’t in Britain?”

N “Ugh, you’re impossible…”

“Naomi huffs and returns her focus to a stack of papers on the desk, leaving a
satisfied raptor in her wake.”

Re “Heh, works every time…”

“I need to learn how to do that.”

Re “S’all ‘bout misdirection…”

“What.”

Re “Deuces.”

“The fuck just happened?”

N “Oh! Anon, I didn’t see you there!”

N “Just in time to finish your paperwork!”

A “Paperwhatsit now?”

N “Go inside, Principal Spears will finalize it with you now.”

“Paperwork? What fucking paperwork? I’m pretty sure all that stuff was finished
before I even came here.”

“Whatever. Probably a detention slip or whatever the principal has planned.”


“I open the door to the cramped office, expecting to see a gruff cave of a
workspace.”

“Instead, it was a fairly well furnished space complete with armchairs and cabinets
of old photos.”

Sp “You going to stand there forever? What are you waiting for? Sit.”

“I plant myself in one of the armchairs and sink a bit lower into the cushion than
expected.”

“Perks of being a human, I guess.”

Sp “I believe I told you last night to be here first thing this morning.”

“Shit!”

Sp “Tell me, do I have a stutter?”

A “...”

Sp “Speak.”

A “N-no, sir.”

Sp “{i}*sigh…*{/i}”

Sp “Take this as a learning experience, Anon.”

Sp “Punctuality gets you far in life.”

A “Yes, sir.”

Sp “I let you off the hook last night because you’re a new student.”

Sp “I meant what I said last night.”

“Hopefully not about the whole pile driving thing.”

--Sp “Have you seen my signature move? The Vehicular Manslaughter?”


--Sp “Since you’re new, I’ll let you pick.”

--Sp “Would you prefer the Prius or the Subaru?”

Sp “Still, I didn’t bring you in here to lecture you.”

“He didn’t?”

Sp “Not many people have to use the school’s financial services.”

A “What?”

A “Financial services?”

Sp “All the paperwork’s done to get you a special lunch card for the semester.”

Sp “You don’t have to worry about paying until after graduation. No interest, no
down payments, none of that.”

A “I uh… What’s happening, sir?”

Sp “You signed up for the financial services, correct?”

Sp “Naomi told me you needed help with food and even had the papers filed out.”

“Naomi?!”

Sp “Allow me to double-check real fast.”

Sp “NAOMI!!”

“Hello tinnitus my old friend…”

--not brazil, Joy get charlie brown adult sound effects for Spears and Naomi here

N “....”

Sp “.....”
“Oh god am I stuck like this?”

Sp “-dismissed Naomi. And just to be absolutely clear, Anon did ask you for this,
correct?”

N “Well, he {i}is{/i} in need of assistance, right?”

N “Otherwise he’s stuck with the budget meals.”

Sp “Anon?”

“I glance between the two.”

It probably wasn’t malicious, but still…”

“I’m not getting involved in office politics today.”

A “... Yes.”

N “Oh, lovely!”

N “Don’t hesitate to ask if you have any other prob-”

Sp “You may leave now, Naomi.”

N “Oh! Yes sir!”

“She leaves the office and Spears clicks the papers on his desk into a stack.”

Sp “Hate to do that, but she goes on for ages.”

Sp “Anyways, go ahead and sign here. Here. Here. Initial here. Date here. Print
your name here.”

“I didn’t catch any of that.”

A “W-what?”

Sp “Just kidding. You’re good to go, Anon, and don’t forget this.”
“He holds out the poorly laminated lunch card for me to take.”

Sp “Just keep in mind,”

Sp “As a senior, this semester is your last, your biggest chance to figure your
future out.”

Sp “Even if you’re new to all of us here at Volcano High, we’re here to help you
make the most of it.”

“Huh…”

A “Thank you, Mister Spears.”

“Mr. Spears nods and gives a small smile.”

Sp “You can come in anytime. I’m always here to listen. Except for topics relating
to estrus season.”

“I sense great exhaustion in that last bit.”

“I thank Mr. Spears one last time and head to homeroom.”

“...”

>>Move to Convergence Point

>>I don’t want to piss off the caveman.

“Probably best I try and not make the principal pissed at me.”

“Campus beautification sounds like slave labor. And my arms are strictly for
shitposting and gaming.”

“I try to recall the way that the pomelo primadonna showed me to the office.”

“I somehow found myself in the potato ranch at the back of the school.”

“Fuck am I tired already.”

A “How the fuck did I end up here?”


??? “Don’t worry man, it happens to new students all the time…”

A “Wha-?”

“Some pink raptor smelling of very heavily burnt grass surprises me.”

??? “If you’re looking for the office you’re gonna wanna go thataway.”

A “Oh- thanks.”

??? “Yeah, no problem, man…”

??? “I’m about to go myself, but I forgot something in my locker.”

??? “See ya.”

“He walks off down another hallway.”

“I should follow the directions he gave me.”

“Oh wait...”

“Was that the drummer from last night?”

“Huh.”

“As I near the office I can feel a heavy tension suffusing the air.”

“In front of the principals’ office is Naomi and some other chick, engaged in a
heated conversation.”

??? “Come on, Naomi, there’s no reason at all for you to keep us from selling
merchandise at school!”

N “Very sorry, Trish, but we’ve already told you before that due to your friends’…
record… we can’t allow you to sell on school grounds.”

N “Seven times, in fact.”

“The purple one, Trish, throws up her hands in frustration.”


T “Six! This is the seventh!”

N “Go ahead and fill out a form if you really want to try again.”

T “I saw last time you just threw it in the trash without reading it!”

N “It was illegible, Trish. You should work on your handwriting a bit.”

T “ARGH!”

T “I don’t have time for this, I need to go track someone down.”

“She stomps away, leaving Naomi to deflate a bit.”

A “That anything important?”

N “Sorry you had to see that, Anon.”

N “Oh, I didn’t notice we were blocking the door from you, my apologies.”

A “The principal asked to see me early, I’m not really in any rush.”

N “Very commendable of you, though!”

N “Go right ahead on in.”

A “Sure, thanks.”

“I open the door to the cramped office, expecting to see a gruff cave of a
workspace.”

“Instead, it was a fairly well furnished space complete with armchairs and cabinets
of old photos.”

Sp “You going to stand there forever? What are you waiting for? Sit.”

“I plant myself in one of the armchairs and sink a bit lower into the cushion than
expected.”
“Perks of being a human, I guess.”

Sp “Punctual like I asked. I like that, Anon.”

Sp “I trust that what happened last night won’t become a recurring problem with
you?”

A “No, sir.”

Sp “Good. I meant what I said last night.”

“Hopefully not about the whole pile driving thing.”

--Sp “Have you seen my signature move? The Vehicular Manslaughter?”

--Sp “Since you’re new, I’ll let you pick.”

--Sp “Would you prefer the Prius or the Subaru?”

Sp “Still, I didn’t bring you in here to lecture you.”

“He didn’t?”

Sp “Not many people have to use the school’s financial services.”

A “What?”

A “Financial services?”

Sp “All the paperwork’s done to get you a special lunch card for the semester.”

Sp “You don’t have to worry about paying until after graduation. No interest, no
down payments, none of that.”

A “I uh… What’s happening, sir?”

Sp “You signed up for the financial services, correct?”

Sp “Naomi told me you needed help with food and even had the papers filed out.”

“Naomi?!”

Sp “Allow me to double-check real fast.”


Sp “NAOMI!!”

“Hello tinnitus my old friend…”

--not brazil, Joy get charlie brown adult sound effects for Spears and Naomi here

N “....”

Sp “.....”

“Oh god am I stuck like this?”

Sp “-dismissed Naomi. And just to be absolutely clear, Anon did ask you for this,
correct?”

N “Well, he {i}is{/i} in need of assistance, right?”

N “Otherwise he’s stuck with the budget meals.”

Sp “Anon?”

“I glance between the two.”

It probably wasn’t malicious, but still…”

“I’m not getting involved in office politics today.”

A “... Yes.”

N “Oh, lovely!”

N “Don’t hesitate to ask if you have any other prob-”

Sp “You may leave now, Naomi.”

N “Oh! Yes sir!”

“She leaves the office and Spears clicks the papers on his desk into a stack.”
Sp “Hate to do that, but she goes on for ages.”

Sp “Anyways, go ahead and sign here. Here. Here. Initial here. Date here. Print
your name here.”

“I didn’t catch any of that.”

A “W-what?”

Sp “Just kidding. You’re good to go, Anon, and don’t forget this.”

“He holds out the poorly laminated lunch card for me to take.”

Sp “Just keep in mind,”

Sp “As a senior, this semester is your last, your biggest chance to figure your
future out.”

Sp “Even if you’re new to all of us here at Volcano High, we’re here to help you
make the most of it.”

“Huh…”

A “Thank you, Mister Spears.”

“Mr. Spears nods and gives a small smile.”

Sp “You can come in anytime. I’m always here to listen. Except for topics relating
to estrus season.”

“I sense great exhaustion in that last bit.”

“I thank Mr. Spears one last time and head out.”

“Naser should be around here somewhere, I wanted to talk to him before class.”

“There’s still a bit of time before the bell.”

“But where would Naser be hanging out about now?”

“Maybe near the cafeteria? This place serves breakfa-”


??? “WAOOOH!!”

--A “Bah GAWD from the top rope!”

“With the screech of a banshee, a blur of purple launches itself onto an


unsuspecting student.”

“Everyone in the hallway pauses to watch as a midget of a triceratops attempts to


bring down the taller raptor student.”

?(T) “IMMAKILLYOUTRIGGA!”

“The student body collectively rolls their eyes and continues on, choosing to
ignore the pissed off trigga as she finally forces the helpless guy to the floor
and sits triumphantly on his chest.”

“I’m pretty sure some would pay good money for this treatment.”

“The ineffectual pummel-slapping included as she flails at the raptor’s face.”

T “You were there last night weren’t you?!”

??? “YES, ALRIGHT, I WAS! GET OFF ME YOU PSYCHO BITCH!”

T “You owe my band an apology!”

??? “WILL IT GET YOU OFF OF ME?!”

T “If it’s good enough.”

??? “ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, I’M SORRY, JUST GET OFF!!”

“Wait, she’s in the band that played yesterday?”

“I… Should get out of here.”

“Last thing I need is whatever’s going on here.”

“I discreetly slip away, down the nearest hall.”


A “That happen often…?”

Nas “Does what happen often?”

A “WAH!”

“Naser’s leaning against a set of lockers, along with that guy from before.”

“The other one’s making a throat-slashing gesture, waving a palm across his neck.”

A “Uhh… nothing important.”

??? “So as I was saying, bro…”

??? “BXR, best tactic in the game, y’know?”

Nas “Erm, yeah... Makes sense, I guess?”

Nas “Anyways, Reed. I’m sorry for how things went last night, I didn’t think those
assholes would laugh at you.”

“Oh.”

Re “Nah man, s’cool.”

Re “They called me because they wanted me to kill bugs crawling on the drums with a
couple sticks, I don't know why a bunch of people came there to watch it"

Nas “Right... And you’re absolutely sure Trish is taking it okay?”

Re “Hell yeah, man. Nothin’ goin’ on in the Trish department at all.”

“Reed suddenly reaches into his pocket and retrieves his phone, tapping away at a
shockingly long password.”

Re “Oh, sick! Right, gotta go. Catch you later, amigo.”

“The raptor bolts before Naser can respond, undoubtedly related to the
triceratops.”

Nas “Weird guy.”

A “Uh, Naser, I actually wanted to talk to-”

“{i}DING-DONG BING-BONG{/i}”
Nas “Crap, can’t miss my homeroom today.”

Nas “Sorry, it’ll have to wait a bit.”

A “It… no, that’s fine.”

A “See you later.”

“Naser heads off down the hall and I go to my own homeroom.”

“...”

>>Convergence Point

“The periods pass and eventually it’s lunchtime again.”

“I’ve been focusing a bit less on class, and more on getting a routine down to
avoid unwanted confrontation.”

“It’s like it’s only me and the teacher in class, phasing out everyone else.”

“I follow the flow of students towards the lunchroom, mindlessly looking about the
halls.”

“Passing by the athletic awards case, a decent amount of group photos have Naser
front and center.”

“Apparently this school is pretty well known for their track team.”

“In a similar vein, Naomi is present in a good deal of the photos in the academic
achievement case.”

“The last case was reserved for general awards, I guess trophies that don’t belong
anywhere else.”

“The school has a few commendation awards for their efforts to stop bullying.”

“Feh, they pass those around to every school.”

“Looking around, there’s several posters on the walls here.”


“All simple slogans to stop the evil bully menace.”

“Fat lot of good those did me at my old school…”

“They always went all in with those efforts.”

“One time they even got the whole student body into the auditorium to watch a short
movie.”

“Some frail, pasty kid gets pestered by a chubby, buff bully.”

“The kid ended up trying to run away and got hit by a car, with the credits
scrolling over a scene in the hospital.”

“Everyone in class just said things like ‘man, good thing I’m not like that
bully.’, ‘yeah, if I ever see a bully like that I’ll help the kid!’”

“Then they went right back to talking about me.”

“... No use feeling bad about the past.”

“I’m here now.”

“With the lunch card in my possession I’m able to snag something actually edible.”

“I should run the math on how much I’ll end up owing, but I feel more like
indulging myself.”

>> Grab the cookies you fatass


>> That sandwich looks good

“Why not both?”

“Hence my tray stacked high with desserts and the tastiest looking sandwich from
the lunchline.”

“Looking around for a place to sit I see the aggravating creamsicle waving at me.”

“Next to her is Naser with a complicated expression.”

Nas “{i}I just wanted to make sure you guys had an actual audience-{/i}”
“Shit. I go and sit across from Naser and Naomi.”

N “I see you’re making use of the lunch card.”

A “Yyyyeeeaaaaah…”

N “But all those sugars! All that is bad for your health, Anon. This school’s vegan
options-”

“I tune her out with the help of a crunchy sugar cookie.”

“A glance at Naser and I notice that he’s just poking at his pasta.”

N “Naser sweetie, you shouldn’t play with your food.”

Nas “Huhwha- OH! Anon, what’s up?”

A “Not much. And you?”

Nas “Yeah no, totally good!”

“His following laugh sounds hollow.”

N “Naser…”

Nas “Yeah yeah. It’s just…”

Nas “Fang stayed home today. The concert was a shitshow and wanted to avoid
everyone. I knew I shouldn’t have invited all those guys.”

“Naomi places a comforting hand on his shoulder.”

A “I uh… Yeah… That crowd was harsh.”

Nas “What happened after I left?”

“Naser looks at me pitifully.”

Nas “Trish gave me a general idea, but I have to know…”


Sp “{i}You are not the only person in the world.{/i}”

“Ah, shit.”

A “The band never made it past the first song. Someone said they ‘still’ sucked. ”

“Naser grits his teeth.”

A “Whoa whoa, calm down man.”

Nas “What else? Did they say anything about Fang?!”

??? “{i}NO ONE WOULD WANT TO FUCK YOU, BITCH!{/i}”

A “...Yeah… I don’t think you’d want to hear it though…”

Nas “And? What happened after! I’m gonna kick all their asses!”

N “Naser! Please calm yourself!”

“{i}I realize now that I had been laughing with them.{/i}”

A “I left after that. Principal Spears was fucking pissed. Even threatened to
suplex them.”

“Naser sags, emotionally spent.”

Nas “Haaaaah.... Fuck… So that’s why she stayed home…”

N “If Fang wishes to stay home then that is her prerogative. You just need to give
her some time, Naser.”

“While she said that I noticed a strange expression cross over Naomi’s face.”

Nas “I know babe. I just wish I could help them more.”

A “Yeah. If you need any help Naser, I owe ya for the pizza.”

“We finish eating and make small talk until the bell signals us to go to our sixth
period.”
“Day two out of however many left is now out of my way.”

“I’m fairly certain that if Naser found out I laughed too I’d need to avoid him.”

“Those cheeto covered claws look like they’d freakin’ hurt, man.”

“With that drama now past me I can just disappear and cheese through the rest of
the year like I’m invisible.”

“Oh when June hits it’s gonna be so sweet.”

“Amen to that.”

“...”

“-Two Days Later-”

“Alarm is off”

“You know the drill.”

“Combat roll, head butt, victory screech.”

“Breakfast, shitposting, clothes.”

“I’m pretty good at this.”

“I think I’ve finally found a pretty good routine for the rest of the year.”

“I might have to go easy on the shitposting though, yesterday I might have over
indulged…”

“But…”

“I’ve succeeded in turning invisible, not completely but so far I’m happy.”

“Even the stupid stuff with Naser seems settled, I can just cruise through
schooling and shitpost in the evening.”
“Perfection.”

“Day four out of however many days are left in the year. So far so good.”

“It’s a bit of a walk, so I get my phone out and start posting on a shitty
imageboard.”

“Baiting people into replying to my posts isn’t the most rewarding of hobbies, but
it passes the time.”

A “>Meteor dodgers
>having jobs
pick one and only one.”

“That oughtta get a few.”

“Just before I hit the reply button, I sense the air behind me turn warmer. A few
wildflowers growing in the cracks of the sidewalk bloom in seconds.”

“She’s here.”

N “Good morning Anon!”

A “It could have been.”

“Naomi catches up to me.”

N “You say something?”

A “Good morning.”

A “Don’t you walk with Naser to school? Where is he?”

N “... He went early today to help set up another student event.”

A “Oh. He’s certainly someone you can count on for that.”

N “He really is! I’m so proud of him!”

A “Yeah…”
N “Umm… Anon, have you seen our lovely award-winning school gardens yet?”

A “Gardens win awards?”

N “They do! Come on, I’ll show you.”

A “Actually, wait, I don’t really wan-”

“Naomi grabs my hand again and when I come to, we’re already there.”

N “And here they are, our school’s flowerbeds!”

N “Aren’t they just magnificent?”

A “Please stop dragging me by the hand.”

“She is right though, the gardens here are absolutely stunning.”

“I can’t tell what’s more colorful, the bushes of flowers, or the students that
tend to them.”

A “Yeah, the gardeners here do a great job.”

N “Hm? Oh, yeah, you can thank the gardening club for that.”

“Naomi guides me through the gardens, occasionally giving tour trivia.”

“I can’t shake the feeling something’s on her mind, though.”

N “And here’s where the freshmen planted flower seeds at the start of the school
year, by the end they’ll bloom wonderfully…”

N “...”

N “And then the… Uh…”

“What’s going on here?”

“Is she coming onto me?”


“I want to ask if she’s upset about something, but is that even right of me to do?”

>> Ask what’s up

A “You alright?”

N “Hm?”

A “Something’s bothering you, right?”

N “Not really… A bit, I guess…

>> Not my place to pry

“Nah, I don’t know her that well.”

“If it’s something personal Naser can help her with it.”

N “I’m sorry, I’ve been a bit stressed lately, Anon...:”

>>Merge here

N “I’ve just been worried about Naser recently…”

A “Something wrong with him?”

N “No, nothing’s wrong…”

N “It’s more that he worries a bit too much for that… sister of his.”

N “Oftentimes when I’m with him, he’s anxious about something she’s done.”

N “I’d just like him to relax about it a bit more, I suppose.”

N “Is that selfish of me to say?”

A “I mean…”

A “I’ve never had a girlfriend, but I imagine that it’d be a bit inconsiderate to
constantly be worried in front of her.”
A “I dunno.”

“Naomi nods her head a bit, staring at her shoes.”

N “Sorry, I just wanted to share with someone.”

N “Guess I ended up doing the same thing I’m complaining about here, huh?”

A “Don’t sweat it.”

“She checks her phone and jumps a bit.”

N “Oh! I’m going to be late!”

N “I still need to check in at the front desk…”

N “Really sorry, Anon, but the tour will have to end here.”

A “It was fine, hopefully it just doesn’t make my allergies flare.”

“She waves and runs off to a side door.”

“I should be getting to homeroom soon, too.”

“I push open the usual side entrance I take and enter the hallway that’s starting
to become familiar now.”

“Still occasionally glancing at the room numbers just to make absolute sure, I
noticed someone in the countercurrent walking past.”

“It was one of the bass players from the concert two days ago.
Naser said she was his sister, right?”

“Glancing at her for a moment, the expression on her face sort of reminds me of
something.”

“It was probably just leftover embarrassment from the concert, but she seemed to
have a lost look on her face.”

“Or maybe it was confusion.”


“Or a mix of the two...?”

“Either way there's something on her mind.”

“I can't help but think that that must be how I looked on my first day.”

“But it was my first day of school, she had been going here all year.”

“What's her excuse then?”

“Either way, doesn’t look like she recognizes me.”

“Objective one out of whatever of the current year is accomplished then, next one
is memorizing the class schedule.”

“And that says it’s home room in fifteen minutes.”

“Home room which I share with Naomi.”

“{i}*shudder*{/i}”

“She’s just too… too {i}sweet{/i}... and like… Obnoxious... ”

“Ugh, I can’t find the right way to put it, but she feels so… movie-like…”

“Like an act.”

“Day four, Anon. day four.”

“What the hell?”

“Why is she scratching herself?”

“Is she a junkie?”

“OH GOD DON’T COME ANY CLOSER.”

“I DON’T WANNA GET SHANKED BY A JUNKIE PTERODACTYL.”


F “You...uh...SKINNIE.”

A “Y-yeah?”

F “Did you see where they went?”

A “...”

F “The group with the uh...”

F “uhhh…”

A “Dinosaurs?”

F “No! Yellow hoodie, red hair, pink tail, hair buns…”

A “Are you describing one person?”

F “What? No!”

F “it’s multiple!”

A “They’re dinosaurs though, right?”

F “WHAT?”

A “I don’t know where they went!”

F “uuuuuuughhhhhh”

“And just like that, she’s gone.”

“I seem to have this effect on women.”

“I call them poison pheromones.”

“But it is relieving that she didn’t recognize me. Guess Naser didn’t tell her.”

“The staccato of the bell signals my tardiness for class.”


“My class with Naomi.”

“If there is a Jurassic God, please make Naomi miss home room today.”

“I’ll even offer a goat sacrifice!”

“...”

“The day passes uneventfully until fourth period, Science Class.”

“I find a seat near the back of the room and watch the clock hands tick down the
remaining few seconds to the bell.”

“Right before the tone, one last student rushes in, out of breath.”

“Oh, it's that girl again. I guess we shared a period or two on the first day and I
just didn't notice.”

“She strides across the room, taking her seat without a word.”

“Strangely, nobody seems to acknowledge her. Not even a sneer or chuckle.”

“That’s odd. Given how many people were there that night, you’d expect at least a
couple of snickers.”

“But there she was, being completely left alone…Or ignored.”

“Seems almost worse than getting laughed at.”

“The lingering chatter in the room dies out as the teacher stands from his desk,
moving to the front of the room.”

DR.F "Good news everyone!"

DR.F "Today we'll be having a lab on magnetic fields."

DR.F "Find a partner and get prepared."

“My heart sunk as those dreaded words passed my ears.”


“'Find a partner.'”

“I know it’s pointless, but I at least have to try. Maybe someone was out sick.”

“With my luck though, I’ll probably just end up with that fossil of a teacher.”

“With everyone else already starting on the assignment I resign myself to working
twice as hard.”

Dr. F “Hurry up Mr. Anon, your partner is waiting for you”

“...What”

Dr. F “Very well. Fang”

Dr. F “If you would be so kind to sit next to your new partner.”

“I sat in momentary confusion as someone took the seat next to mine.”

--not brazil, Forced text speedup through the following 4 lines

“SPAGHETTI ALERT!! SPAGHETTI ALERT!!”

“DEFCON LEVEL TWO”

“THERE IS A FEMOID WITHIN ARMS DISTANCE LOOKING AT ME”

“DEPLOY ALL SPAGHETTI LOCKDOWN MEASURES”

F “‘Sup.”

A “Thanks, you too.”

“SHIT! RECOVERY MANEUVERS NOW!”

A “I mean, hey. Not much. You?”

“CHAD RECOVERY SUCCESSFUL”


F “None of your business. Just do the damn assignment and don’t bother me.”

A “O-oh. You upset right now or something?”

F “What was your first fuckin’ clue. Last time I’ll say it, just do the assignment
and don’t. Bother. Me.”

“Okay! Got to keep coolheaded.”

A “So this assignment, then.”

“With that we open our books and start on trying to decipher who Lorentz is and why
his force is magnetic.

“Things are going well for the first few questions, I remember a bit of it from
that one time I tried to make a railgun.”

Dr. F “How are you two doing so far?”

F “We are… Fine, Dr. Fernsworth.”

DR. F “I see, and you Anon?”

ANON “Yeah what she said.”

“Why is Dr. Fernsworth making that face?”

“I turn to Fang to ask her what the deal is and-”

“Oh.”

Dr. F “Oh dear”

“Mistakes have been made.”

F “She?”

A “...Yes?”

F “Can you {i}not{/i} see?!”


“Oh Raptor Jesus almighty this is the absolute worst case scenario.”

“The infuriated pteradactyl wings spread wide and her taloned finger jabs my
chest.”

F “I. Am. Non. Binary.”

“How was I supposed to know something so trivial would set something like this
off?!”

F “Well?!”

A “...”

“I can’t bring myself to say anything!!”

F “Oh, OH, so that’s how it’s going to be, huh?!”

Dr. F “Fang…”

F “YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST SPIT IN MY FACE AND THEN- AND THEN GIVE ME THE COLD
SHOULDER?!”

F “I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW-”

Dr. F “{b}FANG{/b}.”

“It feels like the world just stopped.”

“All eyes are on Fang.”

“And in Fangs’ eyes I see something flash briefly.”

“Judging by those exaggerated movements and the eloquent speech, this is something
Fang had been practicing.”

“This was supposed to be a big moment where she stopped an evil bigot and the whole
class would clap.”

“In all her planning and practice Fang had made one crucial error.”
“Nobody cared.”

Dr. F “Please consider stepping into the hall for a moment.”

“Sh- Fang is quick to exit the room. Dr. Fernsworth turns a sympathetic look
towards me.”

Dr. F “Forgive them, Anon, you must understand that Fang is… Experiencing issues.”

“What the fuck just happened…?”

“Well, she blew up at me when I called her a she…”

“She was already upset about something before…”

“She was upset before because of the concert the other day?”

“Looks like I just pushed her over the edge.”

“After a few moments Fang comes back in and sits down without a word.”

F “...Sorry.”

A “Uh, don’t worry about it.”

“…”
“….”
“…..”

“Now that I think about it, something’s off.”

“Fang claims to not be male or female, but the clothes she’s wearing are clearly
provocative.”

“It’s almost like she’s showing off her femininity.”

“Then why?”

“Why would someone be wearing revealing clothes in contradiction to their


identity…?”
“It’s almost like they’re just looking for attent-”

“Then suddenly, it hits me. I recall memories of a slightly younger Anon, running
around school with a cape, pilot goggles…”

“… And three plastic katanas.”

“That was a quick way to get sent to the principal's office.”

F “Are you even listening to me?!”

A “Dowhatnow? Wasn’t paying attention.”

F “Yeah, I could tell.”

“She mutters as she turns back to the assignment.”

F “Uh.... You’ve been staring at me for the past 5 minutes. Freak.”

“Judging by the looks of the class, and both of our current social standing, we’ll
probably be working together a lot more.”

>>Sorry for calling you a girl…


>>Sorry Fang I should have known from your feminine appearance and dress that you
are, in fact, non-binary.

>>REGARDLESS OF DECISION MADE

F “Non-binary people don't owe you androgyny”

“Doesn’t seem like it’s something she wants to hear right now.”

A “So um, your Naser’s sister, right?”

F “SIB-ling.”

A “R-right. Sorry.”

F “…”

“There’s a brief pause until Fang speaks up again.”


F “Yes. Naser’s my baby brother, why do you ask?”

A “I was just curious, Naser has been helping me settle into the school.”

F “Of course he did. Just wish he’d keep out of my fuckin’ business for two
seconds.”

A “Uhh… Sure.”

“Actually, thinking about Naser…”

N {i}“It’s more that he worries a bit too much for that… sister of his.”{/i}

N {i}“Oftentimes when I’m with him, he’s anxious about something she’s done.”{/i}

A “...He told me about what happened the other day.”

A “Sorry to hear something like that happened to you and your band.”

F “...”

F “What do you care?”

A “I… Dunno.”

“Suddenly my shoes seem more interesting than the conversation at hand.”

A “Just think it’s messed up people would go to a show just to laugh at you.”

F “Feh.”

F “Guess you aren’t that awful…”

F “Unlike every other guy in this school.”

A “...”

“The rest of the period passed between continued small talk with Fang.”
“She seemed to be controlling the conversation though.”

“When the bell rang, Fang whips out her phone and immediately starts tapping away.”

A “You going to your next class?”

F “Who cares about being late?”

A “Fair. See you then.”

“She lazily waves a hand at me and I make my way to my next class.”

“Unfortunately, fifth period is mathematics.”

“I’m barely keeping myself awake while Mr. Carlesiidewski is giving a lecture on
the inverse of tangents.”

Mr. Carlesiidewski “ANON!”

“I sit ramrod straight at the direct address.”

Mr. Carlesiidewski “Are you frickin’ listening? Come finish this frickin’ problem
on the frickin’ board.”

“Just one social disaster after another today.”

“Hesitantly, I slide out of my chair and trundle my way to the whiteboard, trying
to decipher the runes I'm expected to make sense of.”

“Only I never made it to the whiteboard.”

“Three rows down and my foot catches on a loose backpack strap in the isle.”

“Luckily I fell sideways and there was a cold hard desk in the way to catch my
fall.”

“To the chuckles of the rest of the class, I look up from my final resting place to
see a massive pink and white muzzle.”

Re “Dude.”
“Like a deer caught in headlights, I can only stare and wait for him to continue.”

Re “You’re on my desk man...”

“My senses return to me, and I quickly get up, picking up and returning the pencil
that flew to the floor in a flurry of apologies.”

“Then I recognise just whose desk I fell on.”

“It’s that drummer in Fang’s band.”

“Don’t I just have the luck of the devil?”

“Giving one last apology, I head to the front of the room to solve the whiteboard
problem.”

“I tried solving the problem to the best of my ability.”

“Still took a solid two minutes.”

“After circling my answer, I look expectantly at Mr. Carlesiidewski who gives a


nod.”

“Finally turning around to return to my seat, I freeze.”

“Right there in the front row is the last member of the band, Trish.”

“I stumble back to my desk.”

“Mr. Carlesiidewski gives each row a stack of papers to pass back.”

Mr. Carlesiidewski “Alright, here’s the frickin’ homework covering today’s lesson.
Use page two-seventy-nine. I’ll give you the last…”

Mr Carlesiidewski “Fifteen frickin’ minutes of class to work with your frickin’


peers.”

“Mr. Carlesiidewski returns to his desk and pulls out a math book with a monthly
romance novel[a] crudely stuffed inside it. With very detailed centerfold with the
way he turned it sideways.”
“Looking ahead to Reed’s desk, he’s been joined by Trish who is trying to get him
to get started.”

“I think I can feel their eyes following me…”

“Back at my desk, I glance over the math sheet.”

“Page two-seventy-nine, right?”

“Looks like I finally get to use that phonebook of a math textbook.”

“...Where is it?”

“I open my backpack, and instead of my math textbook…”

“Is the Saturnia Collectors Edition Art-book I splurged on yesterday.”

“I’m frozen. Can’t move an inch.”

“Did I grab the wrong book this morning? Is someone playing a sick joke?”

“How could I bring this to school?!?”

“Something bounces off my head and lands on my desk.”

“It’s enough to snap me back to reality and I shove my backpack under my desk,
furiously zipping it.”

“On my desk is a balled-up wad of paper.”

“Oh great. I was hoping to avoid these chain notes.”

“I unfurl the ball to read the note.”

--”Reply to this post or your mom dies in her sleep tonight.”

“{i}Look up.{/i}”

“I look up and see the purple one waving me over.”


“Fuck.”

“Grabbing my stuff I shuffle over slowly to the duo.”

R “Sup compadre.”

A “Uh… Sup?”

T “See? He’s my class partner so I look out for him.”

T “How are YOU looking out for your class partner, Anon?”

T “Enforcing the social contract, having good conduct and mutual respect so you can
leave class and go on with your life?”

A “Uh....What’s this about?”

T “A certain friend of mine is partnered with you in Science, right?”

“Wait. Oh!”

A “You mean Fang?”

T “They just messaged me before class, said they had to be partnered with a skinnie
bigot - then proceeded to show them.”

T “I had a feeling you’d be him.”

“Am I gonna have to tolerate humiliation from these meteor dodgers too?”

“My head is starting to hurt. Hopefully we can just get started on these math
exercises.”

A “Yeah, that was me. I apologized, though.”

T “I know and I appreciate it.”

T “I’m Trish and this is Reed. We’re Fang’s best friends.”

A “Uh-huh.”
T “What about you? Now you tell us about yourself.”

“RED ALERT.”

“There is no way I’m telling anyone, especially {i}these{/i} people.”

“And if they find out where I was a few days ago…”

A “Uhh... I’m Anon and I’m a human. I got here Monday.”

A “That’s all.”

T “We know that. We want to know where you’re from, what have you been doing since
you got here, if you have any friends…”

A “I-I’ve been doing nothing. I don’t really care about friends.”

“She doesn’t look very convinced by that answer.”

T “Right.”

Re “You know that Naser dude, right...?”

T “Hey… Yeah, I saw you with that slut Naomi earlier, too…”

“Trish squints her eyes at me.”

A “T-they were my welcoming committee, they helped me with getting settled, nothing
besides that.”

T “Riiiiight. Didn’t Naser or Naomi invite you to anything...or…?”

A “No. I don’t remember. I’ve been trying to get them off my back. But w-why you
ask?”

T “We had a concert last week, Naser and Naomi invited a whole bunch of assholes to
ruin it. Suppose if we had seen a human in that crowd we would remember, right?”

A “Y-yeah. Haha.”
A “I-I mean, concert?”

“I don’t think they invited me here to solve math problems.”

T “We have a band. I’m the lead bassist, Fang’s the vocalist and secondary bass,
and Reed is the drummer.”

Re “...And the songwriter.”

T “He just comes up with the funny song titles.”

A “Uhhh...that’s very neat! Would love to listen to your band someday.”

“I drag my chair backwards and clumsily rise from my seat”

A “It was great meeting you guys, I’ll be going back to my desk, though…”

T “Wait, I’m not done with you yet.”

A “What? I really should get started on the homework...?”

T “It’s important. Look at me.”

“She has a very serious look on her face.”

“She’s not saying anything, her glaring through the back of my skull makes me think
she means business.”

T “Fang is happy. They found something about themself they finally like, and I
helped them through a dark time. They made up their mind.”

“They? Themself? No wonder Naser seemed so confused by this.”

T “They don’t need people in their life that might hurt or confuse them. They have
us, and the band. We’re trying to make it for ourselves.”

A “O...kay?”

T “I look out for them because I care for them. They’ve been hurting because of
those dicks, I’m doing my part in assuring them.”
“Was that what I saw her doing earlier?”

“Looked more like a one trigga trig-out.”

A “I don’t understand.”

T “My point is, don’t upset Fang.”

“I just wanted to solve math problems.”

A “I, er... yes, ma’am.”

“Once again she’s just glaring at me.”

“Fucking hell my stupid legs, stop shaking.”

“I’ll take this opportunity.”

A “Uh… thank you for the lesson, Trish. I’ll keep that in mind. See ya.”

Re “Wait man- you want this?”

“Reed holds out a sheet of paper.”

“Wait, it’s a copy of the homework assignment-”

“And it’s complete?!”

A “Wait, I thought you were the one needing help?”

Re “Shhhh, the friend of my friend who’s the friend that helps me is also my friend
too.”

A “I don’t think that’s how the saying goes...?”

Re “You’re sharp, Anon. Razor sharp. Friends?”

“The bell announces lunchtime, and the rest of the students collectively rise and
start shuffling out the door.”
A “Lunch hour, been a blast talking to you guys.”

“I swiftly snatch up the backpack by my leg, flashing an earnest sympathetic smile


at them - or at least I thought it was one.”

"As I power walk out of the classroom I swear I caught a glimpse of Reed waving
goodbye."

“A shame I have other places to be. Namely away from the pissed off midget.”

"Sorry man, you seem like a good guy. But with that tiny tyrant?”

“Not in this lifetime."

“That was the worst fucking experience in a long while. Almost as bad as actually
dealing with Fang in class.”

“Here I was thinking I could be invisible for the rest of the year,”

“...And now I have classmates talking about me behind my back on their phones,
probably for the rest of the school year.”

“At least it’s the best period of the day now.”

“Wonder what to get for lunch today…”

“Wait.”

A “What’s that smell?”

"Oh no."

“I duck into a corner and rip the backpack open.”

“What should have been my lunch card, binders, and horrendously embarrassing art
book…”

“Was instead a half dozen glass flasks, bags full of… something, and all sorts of
machinery I didn’t recognize.”

“Someone… someone else has my backpack… and that book.”


“If they see...”

A “...”

“This backpack…”

"It's from the Reed guy, I’ll bet."

“When I rushed out of class…”

"Fuck me."

“On the other hand…”

“I could get a medal of honor for turning all this stuff in...”

“Think you can even get a bit of cash for reporting stuff like this.”

“...What am I thinking?”

“Any amount of money is NOT worth my power level being revealed.”

"I can't ruin my life. Not again"

"Especially not with these losers."

"A half-hour until lunch period ends. Good."

“I need to find Reed.”

“I double back to the classroom I just left and find it empty.”

“Fuck.”

“Maybe he’s getting his lunch now. Cafeteria then.”

"I sprint through the school hallways, already familiar with the layout, looking
for the drug dealer."
“The colorful crowd in the lunch line makes it difficult to pick Reed out, so I
have to carefully scan the room.”

“I finally spot the pink raptor at the end of the queue, tray in hand and
incriminating evidence on his back.”

“The world must be fucking with me since {b}I’m{/b} the one currently carrying a
mini-cartel in a backpack.”

A “REED!”

“The stoner drummer turns my way as I try as calmly as possible to approach him.”

Re “What up, my guy?”

A “I uh…”

“I give the backpack a bump, causing all the dubious glassware within to clink.”

A “Think you got my backpack, Reed.”

Re “Huh… Was wonderin’ why this felt lighter.”

“He holds out my backpack to me.”

Re “‘Ere ya go, man.”

“We trade backpacks, I’m careful to hand his over while simultaneously examining
mine still within his grip.”

“It doesn’t look like he opened it at all but…”

A “Thank fuck…”

Re “Why’re you so worried bout the bag, man?”

“Shitfuckfuckfuckfuck.”

A “Becaaaauuuuuse…”

“Don’tbringuptheartbook.”
“Think you dumbfuck, there’s gotta be something you can say-”

“Naomi I owe you a fruit basket!”

A “My lunch card!”

A “I wouldn’t have been able to get my lunch without it.”

Re “Oh. Oh! Oh fuck, dude I’m sorry to hear that.”

“What.”

Re “New kid in school AND you need the lunch card?”

Re “Do you like, wanna hang with us? You look like the lonely type.”

“FUCK no.”

A “Naaaaah, I’ll be good. I just needed my-”

Re “Come on bro, I’ll introduce you to the whole band.”

A “You don’t have to-”

Re “Y’know... reward your good deed with a good deed.”

A “What.”

Re “I’ll like, be your first friend, Anon.”

A “What.”

--Re “I’m gonna get you laid, and you’re gonna get to {b}choose{/b}.”

--Re “You can have Naomi, Trish, or Fang.”

Re “Yeeaah, man.”

A “I appreciate it, but… Y’know…”


Re “You worried about Trish, bro?”

A “...”

Re “Yeaah, she can be a bit rough, but she’s great.”

A “Isn’t she on a crusade to assault everyone that laughed at your concert?”

Re “Oh yeah, she does that sometimes, don’t worry about it.”

A “Hrmmm…”

Re “‘s fine for you to be worried.”

Re “You’ll see, she’s plenty nice.”

“Maybe I was a bit quick to judge...”

“See, there’s Trish now.”

T “Hey, Reed.”

T “Sorry, gonna have to return that crowbar a bit later than I promised.”

T “Also, I got vengeance on another one of those jerks.”

A “Those aren’t… related, right?”

T “Who’s asking?”

“I need to get out of here.”

A “Well Reed, thank you for talking, I’ll just be on my wa-”

Re “Hoolld on man, Trish just got here.”

T “Reed, what’s all this about?”


Re “Anon here and I had a little… mix-up?”

Re “Anyways, he was a total bro about it…”

Re “And he’s like, super poor and stuff.”

T “How poor?”

Re “Y’know that lunch card thing they advertise on the school brochures?”

T “Bull.”

Re “Show her, Anon.”

A “I’d rather not…”

T “Oh my goodness you poor soul.”

Re “Literally, even.”

Re “So I figured, why not be a bro back to him?”

Re “Like uhhh…”

Re “Be his legit welcome committee.”

A “I appreciate the thought, but uhh...I should really be going right about… now,
bye.”

T “Oh, Fang, what took you so long today?”

“Why meeee…”

F “Yo. Wait, is that Anon? what’s {i}he{/i} doing here?”

“No, it’s the other new human transfer student with the dress sense of Rex Luthor.”

A “Heeeey Fang. Good to see ya again. Well lunch is almost over so I’ll-”

Re “He’s poor.”
T “Like, super poor!”

F “How poor?”

T “Y’know those lunch cards they have on posters near the principals’ office?”

F “Wow. That is hilariously depressing.”

“I hate everyone here.”

F “Anyways, that doesn’t answer my question of why the skinny loser here.”

Re “Man, Anon’s like a total bro an’ I’m his {i}first{/i} friend an’ we’re gonna be
Rock Ring buddies for the rest of the school year!”

Re “Then like… he’ll be my business partner an’ we’ll sell enough goods to get half
the country high an’ like, fuck narcs and fuck the IRS too.”

A “...”

F “Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrggggghhhhhhh. Trish?”

T “The morons swapped backpacks and now they’re best friends or something.”

A “Yeah. That. And now I’m gonna go grab my lunch so-”

Re “We can all grab some together.”

T “...Well, Reed {i}is{/i} a good judge of character…”

F “Is he?”

A “...Didn’t you already grab your lunch, Reed?”

Re “Yeah. I want seconds, man.”

“What.”

“I look at Reed’s tray and see that it’s completely empty.”

A “When did you- How?!”


Re “Come on, man, I’ve got a mean case of munchies.”

“I end up walking to get food with Trish, Reed and Fang.”

“Every time I consider ditching them, Reed says or does something to keep me with
the band.”

“Fuck my life.”

“I’m able to hold the makings of a conversation with Reed, but it feels like I’m
talking to space.”

“Trish was listening in while we made our way to the lunch room, but was more
focused on her talk with Fang.”

F “What do you mean my halter top is ‘out’ right now? I haven’t noticed a
difference.”

T “I’m telling you, the next thing is going to be leotards.”

F “No, fuck that. I would never wear something that retarded.”

“As for Reed…”

Re “...So… You play videogames, right?”

A “Yeah, I got a couple consoles and a toaster of a PC.”

Re “Only Xrox… Battle Saurs is sick…”

A “Pachystation has a better lineup overall.”

Re “But like… Stony-games are all lame… like, just movies lame...”

A “You can’t prove that.”

Re “I can.”

A “Huh?”
Re “Get your phone out man… Look up ‘LW_S9znpklI’.”

A “How did you say that out loud?”

Re “Just look it up man…”

“What’s the harm?”

A “...”

“What on earth…?”

Re “Pretty hilarious right?”

“What is this, a shitty Netstix cartoon knock off?”

A “It’s funny in a way, yeah.”

Re “Xrox is better anyways, you see the whole lineup they had prepared for...”

“Reed delves into his rant about console differences.”

“I thought he was just an airhead, but…”

“I totally can’t get a read on this guy.”

F “Well, anyways.”

F “The lunch lines aren’t going to get any shorter.”

F “We should hurry and pick one.”

“Once we all got our food, we all stand around chatting a bit more outside the
line.”

“Trish and Fang babble to each other about their daily activities all through the
lunch line.”

“Reed on the other hand has pulled out a tablet from his backpack to show me
something.”
Re “So like, y’know we got a band, yeah?”

A “Er, yeah. Trish brought it up earlier and all.”

Re “Check it. I’ve been recording our practices.”

“Fang and Trish both look at me expectantly.”

“Fuckshitfuckokay you can do this.”

A “Cool, lemme see.”

“Even through the poor recording quality I can see and hear just how atrocious the
band is.”

“I bite back the grimace threatening to come out as I give the video my full
attention.”

F “W-well?”

T “We’re great, right Anon?”

A “It’s uh… certainly original.”

T “I know, right?”

A “But like, why two basses?”

“Fang glances at me from the side. Weird.”

T “It’s our style!”

A “I-I see.”

“What do I say here? I can only give feedback on games I haven’t played, not
music!”

>>I like the double tension on the G strings.


>>The synchronization between the melody and the submelody compliments the reverb
well!
>>Very nice ironic reference to Beethoven’s Für Elise.
>>Regardless of choice

“The three stop moving in their tracks and look back at me.”

“Think I messed up.”

F “How could you tell?”

Re “Jeez man, you got the ears of a bat?”

A “Uhh, just something I picked up.”

F “I didn’t know you knew about that sort of thing, Anon…”

Re “Yo, next time we have a concert… You gotta come along.”

F “...Maybe…”

“Trish glowers at me warily.”

T “I dunno, maybe if he actually talked about himself for once.”

“Nope, nah uh, no way, abort!”

Re “Yeah, man, go ahead. None of us are judgin’. I’m not at least.”

A “Well…”

F/Re/T “Ohfuck. Sorry Anon, we gotta bail.”

A “Huh? Where-”

“They’re already gone.”

“Pretty impressive how fast they can move even with their hands full.”

“But what could’ve made them run like that?”


N “ANON!”

“Oh.”

“I turn around to see Naser and Naomi approaching, food in hand.”

N “I knew I’d find you here with the others, Anon!”

N “Shame they ran off, why do they do that?”

“Her shrill goody goody sugary voice is piercing through the chatter of the
lunchroom, I don’t wanna reply if it means hearing more of her voice…”

N “ Wasn’t that Naser’s sister? How wonderful that you’re making friends, Anon!”

N “Tell me everything! What were you and Fang talking about? I didn’t know you were
friends!”

N “I wanna know all about it!”

“Oh help me, God. I just can’t catch a break.”

“I just want to go home…”

“But there's still half a day to go…”

Nas "Hey Anon… you uh...seem kinda low energy, are you alright?"

“The Anon you are trying to reach is currently having an existential meltdown.”

“Please leave your message after the scream.”

--A “REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.”

N "Aaaww, he's just thrilled to make new friends!"

Nas "Yeah man, good on you. You’re quite the extrovert!"

“I’m mentally screaming, I swear I just want to get out and never come back.”
Nas “Was that really my sibling you were hanging with?”

A “Fang and her friends, yeah. Strange group, I know.”

N “I’ll say.”

Nas “Sh-they’re not that bad once you get to know them.”

A “Colorful folk, I know.”

Nas “Uh...no...I mean -THEY-...”

A “Hm?”

Nas “Fang!”

A “Uh-huh… sure hope so. Seems I’m going to be her lab partner for the rest of the
year.”

Nas “Whoa.”

“Naomi pauses for a second.”

Nas “Honestly. They’re just going through a phase man.”

A “That phase include rants about non-binarism?”

Nas “*sigh* Fang hit you with that too?”

N “What a great opportunity for real friendship Anon! I’m so happy for you!”

Nas “...?”

A “...?”

N “If there’s anything Fang needs in these trying times, it’s a new friend to talk
to!”

A “Uuuuuh, I don’t know about that, you know how they is, right?”
N “I would love it if you tried! Naser would appreciate it!”

“Would he?”

Nas “Whoa, calm down, boo. That’s not how it works...and I don’t think…”

“The bell’s loud sound rings on our ears”

“A rush of relief and dopamine overcome me.”

“I’m free.”

Nas “Uhhh...we’ll talk later, Anon. I’ll have to keep my eye on you, though.”

N “don’t worry, Naser. I know Anon is of good character!”

“What is she talking about?”

“You know what, it don’t matter. Nonathiss matters.”

“Only useful thing I learned all day.”

A “Uhhhh...I guess I’ll have to go now, see you around.”

“Be a little nicer, Anon”

A “Ask if you need anything, I’ll help you out.”

N “Oh I’ll hold you on that one! Just you wait, hahahahahah!”

“Nice. Now you’ll never get them off your back, now. Congratulations.”

Nas “Hey, take it easy, man!”

N “Come Naser! We have a busy day today!”

N “Oh, sure.”

A “See ya.”
“...”

3. Band Practice
“-One Week Later-”

"It's math. Bane of retards and lazy intellectuals alike.”

“And teachers too, judging by the lack of a certain pervert teacher.”

“Substitute today, which means busywork. Group problems busywork specifically."

"Of course, I can't escape this any more than I could have escaped the lab partner
assignment.”

“At least here I have the opportunity to just keep to myself for an hour."

"I don't even bother attempting the assignment, instead pretending my phone is a
calculator and spending the first half shitposting about video games I haven’t
played online."

"The second half, interrupted by something pointy to the back of the dome."

"*sshk*"

"I can feel something stuck between my chair and my back.”

“I fish around and pull out a crumpled paper airplane, a completed set of
problems."

"...this is Reed's. And it's..."

"...done? Even the extra problems that I don't even bother with because they take
another ten minutes each."

"I turn around to see that technicolor burnout waving me over. He's sitting next to
Trish.“

“She's giving me the evil eye."

"At least I think it's the evil eye. Whatever that expression is, it clashes with
her smile."
"Might as well see what they want."

"As I weave through the maze of desks squished together with partners more
interested in their phones than the worksheet, I catch a hint of whatever Reed and
Trish are talking about."

Re "...Honesty is the best policy, eh?”

Re “...Bad juju to keep somethin’ bottled up..."

"Reed grabs hold of another chair and sets it on Trish's other side, nodding in my
direction before taking a big pull from whatever he's got in that thermos on his
desk."

"The widening of his pupils suggest its more than just Roarbucks cold brew in it."

T "Hey, Anon!"

A "You guys need something?"

T "Nah, just wanted to chat a bit since we got the time"

"There’s something in her tone of voice…”

“It’s like she's getting ready to gore me with those nubs she calls horns."

A "...Sure"

Re "Imma let you two get to whatever… gonna go for a refill..."

"He shakes his thermos and heads for the door."

"What's in that anyway?"

Re "Don't ask..."

"Fair enough."

"...Wait..."
"Fuck it.”

T "So… Anon… You and Fang?”

A “...You and Fang what?”

T “They’ve been talkin’ about you.”

A “They?”

“The tiny triceratops rolled her eyes dramatically.”

T “Fang. Fang’s been talkin’ bout you.”

A “All good things, I’m sure.”

“Fang’s been talking about me? That’s dumb.”

“Oh yeah. The phones.”

“All we’ve been doing is more labwork in science.”

“Last Thursday I tried to remember how to make a railgun.”

“To show I could, of course.”

F “Pfft, I could make one too.”

“She seemed unimpressed at the time, but…”

A “Was it about making a railgun?”

T “Er… Yeah, it was.”

T “What exactly are you talking about with them?”

A “Just science stuff.”

A “The railgun is just something I happen to know though, picked it up from an old
game.”
“Trish raises an eyebrow.”

T “...Right.”

A “Why do you ask?”

T “You learned to make a deadly weapon from a video game?”

“Her tone is flat. Unlike her chest.”

A “I wouldn’t say deadl-”

T “Don’t interrupt.”

T “Why would you think that it’s a good idea to make a weapon in class?”

T “How did you not get in trouble?”

A “Spears actually did talk to me, said something about the ‘great equaliser’.”

“Trish grabs the bridge of her snout.”

T “This is why men are useless.”

“She continues to mutter to herself. All of it incoherent.”

A “Is there a point?”

“She rounds back on me, anger painted clearly on her face.”

T “Look, Anon, YOU may be into that stuff, but leave Fang out of it.”

T “They have better things to do than… than…”

T “Than play with some man-child’s lethal toys!”

Re “Whoa… Harsh…”
“Reed slumps into the seat next to Trish, sipping on his thermos of…”

Re “Just agua, bro…”

“Thermos of water…”

“What the-”

Re “What’d I miss?”

T “I’m just trying to tell Anon here that he shouldn’t be telling Fang how to make
a fuckin’ gun in school.”

Re “Why not?”

T “We’ve been over this.”

Re “We have? When?”

T “Less than five minutes ago.”

Re “Thought we were talkin’ about Anon?”

T “Yes!”

T “And specifically!”

T “We were talking about Anon’s gun!”

“Heads start to turn.”

“Reed grins at them all”

Re “Then how bout these guns?”

“Reed places his hands on the back of his head and flexes his biceps.”

“Trish’s face is a blur of emotions. At first confused, then fucking pissed, then
aroused, then back to fucking pissed, all in the space of an attosecond.”
T “Not those! The one he made with magnets!”

Re “But like… how do magnets work?”

“*DING-DONG BING-BONG.*”

“All at once all the students giving the clock a blank stare stand to attention and
file out the door.”

T “I-I… Damn it, Reed!”

“Trish punches Reed in the shoulder, gives me another evil stare, and saunters out
the room.”

Re “Hey.”

“Reed’s pats me on the shoulder.”

Re “Bruh.”

“He gives me a thumbs up and exits as well.”

“Leaving only the substitute teacher, looking at me from her desk impatiently for
me to leave.”

“Guess it’s her lunch period, too.”

“...”

“Naser ended up dragging me to sit with him and the magenta motormouth again.”

“Naomi hovers over Naser, who currently has Gucci under his eyes.”

Nas “So, I uh… Talked to the soccer team earlier.”

Nas “They’re going to make the first game after all.”

N “Isn’t that great, Anon?”

A “...”
Nas “I also… Got the L&L Club to finally take down their christmas decorations…”

Nas “So… The library’s clean again…”

“Naser’s head lands in his chicken salad, then he jerks wide awake.”

N “NASER!”

Nas “OH GOOD LORD NOT THE WATER-”

A “...”

Nas “Ugh… Sorry.”

Nas “...Did you say something, Anon?”

A “Naser, you look like you fell into another blender.”

A “What’s going on, big guy?”

Nas “Don’t worry about it…”

Nas “Just some… Family problems last night…”

A “Like what?”

Nas “Ugh…”

N “You don’t have to tell him if you don’t want to, dear.”

N “Why don’t you wipe that alfredo sauce off your cute little face.”

“She’s so saccharine she’d give a third world country diabetes”

Nas “It’s my sister again…”

“Why is it always his sister with him?”

N “Aww…”
Nas “I was going to sleep last night, when I heard something downstairs.”

“...When did this turn into an interrogation?”

Nas “It was about one or two in the morning. I checked what it was, and…”

Nas “Fang was just, standing in front of the microwave.”

Nas “Staring at the dino nuggets rotate inside.”

“At one in the morning?”

Nas “At one in the morning.”

N “This is a personal issue, isn’t it?”

N “Wouldn’t you rather just be enjoying lunch with us?”

Nas “I just need advice from someone at this point, Naomi.”

N “But from Anon?”

A “But from me?”

“Naser continues.”

Nas “I asked her what she was doing, and she just…”

Nas “Just says ‘fuck off…’, so I think ‘maybe Dad will help’.”

Nas “...He didn’t.”

Nas “...They just got into a shouting match.”

Nas “Screamin’ bout her lack of control an’ Dad was pissed an’-”

N “Poor baby.”
“Naomi wraps her arms around Naser’s head, cradling the tired pterosaur in her
bosom.”

“There’s a rumbling snore and it’s clear that Naser has checked out.”

A “...Riiiiiiiight…”

“Naomi looks distraught.”

N “He’s always like this…”

N “But it’s been getting worse recently...”

A “Going unconscious?”

N “Trying to help. Wearing himself ragged.”

N “That Fang…”

N “We should help Naser.”

A “What, by talking to Fang?”

N “By taking him to the nurses office.”

“Ah fuck.”

“Naomi looks at me with the biggest, wettest doe eyes possible.”

A “Alright alright. He doesn’t look that heavy anyway.”

N “Only a hundred and sixty pounds.”

A “How do you- nevermind.”

“Naomi puts herself under Naser’s left arm, motioning me to take the other one.”

“I sling his arm around my back and-”

“GOOD LORD HE’S HEAVY.”


N “Alright, the Nurses’ Office is down the main hall on the left side, near the
front desk.”

“I’m clenching my face too much to be able to speak, I can only get a slight nod
out.”

“...”

“After dropping Naser at the nurse and leaving before Naomi could argue with her
about staying, the lunch bell rings.”

“With music at the ass end of the campus I have to sprint through the halls.”

“Fuck today, I avoided gym class for a reason.”

“Halfway to Music class, I slam into somebody and tumble to the floor.”

(???)Stella “You…”

A “AH!”

“Sorry, sorry sorry!”

“I get up from the floor and look at the stego who bumped into me. The plates on
her back twitch as she looks me up and down.”

???(Stella) “Judgement…”

“A chill rolls over me.”

???(Stella) “Karma? No. No, maybe second chance?”

“She draws closer, a contemplative expression on her face.”

???(Stella) “Ah, I see now.”

A “What?”

???(Stella) “You’ve important choices to come.”


A “I do? Wait back up what the fuck are you talking about?”

???(Stella) “This.”

“She reaches toward my chest, plucking something off of it. She holds it up for me
to see it’s some oversized playing card.”

A “Still lost.”

???(Stella) “It’s you. Your card. You are on the precipice of a great ordeal. Many
difficult points of divergence and contention are coming your way. Reflect on
them.”

“I think about asking the green weirdo to make sense, but the bell is about to
ring.”

A “Yeah, thanks, sure. Sorry, gotta dash.”

“I slam into the band room door just as the late bell trills, panting and sweaty.”

Mr. Jingo “Good timing, Mr. Mous. Just in time for free period.”

“What…”

Mr. Jingo “Take up anything you like and have fun.”

“The teacher then took to his extremely lavish loveseat, threw on a pair of
headphones and blacked out.”

“I looked at the scattered instruments, left alone for whatever reason.”

“Dent looking brass and cracked woodwinds. Even a bass with a missing string.”

“Wow. I feel like that right about now.”

“I reach for one at random, taking a wooden… thing…”

“It looks like an oak tree made love to an eggplant and this is the aborted
monstrosity in Mexico.”

“Whatever, I melt into my chair and pull out my phone. Seems a majority of my
classmates have a similar idea.”

“I’ve some shitposting to do.”

“Let’s see…”

#phone overlay with Elliot Raptor, and the text ‘he made some valid points :^)’

“Ah yes, perfect. Click post aaaand now to wait.”

“Nefarious deed for the day done, I look around the room out of boredom.”

“Oh fuck no.”

“Fang has a weapon of mass hearing loss.”

“I’m covering my ears in preparation when the ptero-rist starts strumming and…”

“Oh wow.”

“I still have my hearing.”

“In fact she’s actually playing something pleasant.”

“It’s mellow. Relaxed. A slow rhythm that carries a strange nostalgic hint to it.”

“The difference between this and the performance is night and day.”

“What gives?”

“Looking a bit closer, she’s swinging her tail a bit to the rhythm.”

“She uses her tail as a metronome?”

“Suddenly, the phone slips from my hand onto the floor.”

A “SHIT!”

“The sound it makes as it clatters on the ground is a klaxon of pants-shitting


terror.”
“It lies face down on the isle.”

“Do I really want to pick it up and potentially face a harsh reality?”

“Schrodingers’ crack.”

“...I can’t just leave it there.”

“I pick up the phone and slowly turn it over.”

“It’s the moment of truth.”

“...No cracks?”

“Thank the Lord.”

F “Yeah, you got lucky.”

“Fang has stopped playing and is throwing a small smirk my way.”

“I should probably say something…”

“Her playing is pretty good, I'll compliment that.”

A “That sounded way better than in the video Reed took.”

“...”

“Wrong choice of words.”

F “You’re still not off my shit list, watch it.”

“Quick Anon, think”

A “Why don’t you play guitar in your band then, you’re obviously a lot better with
it.”

F “Would if I could.”

A “What do you mean?”


“There’s an empty seat next to Fang.”

“Finders’ keepers, I guess.”

F “The band is just Reed, Trish, and I.”

F “So we all have to decide by majority what happens.”

F “Reed says using a bass is more unique, and Trish always says how it’s a
‘promising business model’.”

A “But it sounds like you play the guitar much easier than a bass.”

F “I play the bass just fine.”

F “I think the problem is more that if you want to make an unconventional band
layout, you damn well better know what you’re doing.”

F “If you’re anything short of masterful it won’t sound good.”

F “And when it comes to music, it either sounds good or it doesn’t.”

F “Simple as.”

“I’ll say.”

“She continues strumming.”

A “But it’s just a high school band, right?”

A “Shouldn’t it just be fun?”

F “It is, yeah.”

A “Even though you’re just doing what they want without getting a say in it?”

“Fang flinches and misses a note.”

F “...”
F “It’s not like that…”

F “It’s just… Trish says… I mean… God damn it.”

F “Look, we’re better with two basses. Trish and Reed say so.”

A “The au--”

“Uhp”

“Fuck”

“I almost said ‘’the audience at the concert’’ to her outloud.”

F “What was that?”

A “Nuthin’”

“Fang growls at that.”

F “You know what, we’re having band practice after school today.”

F “Just show up and see for yourself.”

A “And what if I don’t?”

F “You’ll be a little bitch that’s wrong.”

“Oh.”

“In that case.”

A “Fuck you, I’m right, your band sucks with two basses, and you shoulda been on
guitar!”

“I lock eyes with her.”

F “Fuck you!”
A “Fuck you!”

F “Fuck! You!”

A “FUCK YOU!”

Mr. Jingo “Aaaaand we’re caaaaaalm now.”

“Fuck me.”

“...”

F “Hurry up, dweeb. If I can keep ahead of you while carrying two instruments, you
can speedwalk.”

A “You sure you don’t want me to carry one?”

F “Pfeh.”

“Fang is leading me back to the auditorium with both the acoustic guitar ‘borrowed’
from the music room and her bass in hand, one over each shoulder.”

“When we eventually get to the auditorium, Fang stops.”

“Is something wrong?”

A “Uh, is everything-”

F “The doors, moron.”

“She swings the guitar cases on her shoulders around a bit.”

“Oh.”

“I step around her and grab the handle, pulling the door wide open.”

A “Ladies first.”

“Fang growls and stomps on my foot as she walks past.”


“...”

A “FUCK!”

F “Hurry up already.”

“Inside, Reed and Trish already have everything set up onstage.”

“Where does Reed keep that huge drumset during the day?”

“Trish waves her arms from the stage.”

T “HEY, FANG! WHAT TOOK SO LONG?”

F “HAD TO GRAB SOMETHING.”

“Trish squints in the spotlight, then finally notices me.”

T “What-”

T “What’s he doing here?!”

“Fang slings both cases onto the stage, then climbs on herself.”

F “Proving a dumbass bigot wrong.”

A “So you admit there’s smart ones?”

“Fang then ripped something from Trish’s hands and threw it at me. ”

T “What the fuck?!”

“It strikes against my head with a dull *tonk* and lands on the ground in front of
me.”

“Looking down at the makeshift shuriken, it was a copy of “VVORM DRAMA’s new hit
single Indragon Onslaught”

T “Fang! I just made that in art class!”


A “It looks like picasso had a seizure.”

F “He was being an ass!”

A “I was.”

Re “Like… are we on break now?”

T “We haven’t even started!”

T “Fang! Why is Anon here?!”

F “Like I said, proving him wrong.”

A “More like proving me right.”

T “Proving him wrong how?”

Re “Like… Playing guitar, right? Ya wanted to play your guitar…”

T “What?”

F “Yes! I mean-”

A “Ha!”

F “No, I mean Anon thinks that if I used a guitar instead of bass the music would
sound better.”

T “What? No wayyyy.”

F “I know, right?”

Re “Woooow… Way to try throwing everything off, Anon...”

F “Mm. Let’s just go through ‘I Need Meth Money By Tuesday Night And If I Don’t Get
It I Will Stomp On Your Child’.”

“Don’t say ayy lmao.”

F “Three… Two... One..”


“My mind went blank.”

“I don’t know what happened during the time when it was blank”

--“All I know is that when I came back to reality my shoulders felt wet, I was on
the ground, and I had a raging migraine.”

“Trish was standing over me, looking down.”

Re “...This always happens…”--

“I look to the stage and see Fang, panting, looking distressed.”

F “S-see? Totally awesome, r-right?”

“Not the word I would use.”

A “...I think you should give the guitar a try.”

T “Oh shut up, you don’t know anything about music.”

F “Might as well. That’s what I brought him for, after all.”

T “You’re really siding with him on this?”

T “We already decided VVURM DRAMA is better with only drum and bass, remember?”

Re “Yeah man… WAY more unique that way.”

A “Aren’t there like two bands in existence that pulled it off?”

Re “That means there’s a chance then, yeah…?”

A “It can’t hurt to try, right?”

T “You don’t get a say in this, it’s a band decision and we already made our
choice.”

F “Maybe he’s right, Trish. What’s the big deal?”


T “The ‘deal’ is we’re wasting enough time as it is when we should be practicing!”

T “Especially wasting time on playing guitar when it doesn’t match any of our
stuff.”

“That clearly struck a nerve.”

F “‘Wasting time’ playing guitar? What’s THAT supposed to mean?”

“Fang rounds on Trish, jabbing an accusing finger into the little triceratop’s
surprisingly voluptuous chest.”

F “Every time I want to make changes you guys always overrule me!”

F “Even when it’s something like playing my favorite instrument in my own band!”

“Yikes.”

T “Come on Fang, you know I didn’t mean it that way!”

T “We decided that democratically, right Reed?”

Re “Yeah, but… like, there are only three of us, y’know?”

“I’ll hate myself for this…”

“...this is already getting too intimate for me...”

“...but maybe I should say something.”

“It’s only going to get worse if I don’t”

“But this seems like a personal argument between them.”

>>Speak Up
>>Stay Silent

>>Speak Up

“Fang does seem very passionate about playing guitar.”

“It could only help their music, right?”


A “Just give Fang a chance, have you ever even let them play guitar with the band?”

“That seemed to stop Trish in her presidential yeezys.”

T “I- uh, well… not really. We voted on it in our first jam session together.”

“Fang made a weird face, like she couldn’t believe I was standing up for her.”

“Honestly I couldn’t believe I stood up for her either.”

“But god dammit I’m winning this challenge!”

A “If you’re really Fang’s friend, you should at least let them try.”

“...”

“Trish’s mouth opened and closed, as if she was trying to find the right words.”

“She threw up her hands and let out a frustrated sigh.”

T “Fine, I guess we can try it with the guitar…”

>>Move to Convergence point

>>Stay Silent

“Can’t guarantee their style won’t be better than dogshit if I lose this
challenge.”

“Certainly can’t get worse.”

“This is between the members of the band.”

T “In the end, majority still rules.”

T “I’m sorry, Fang, but we can’t get into creative squabbles like this all the
time.”

T “And you already agreed to it, right?”

“How controlling.”
“Fang hangs her head in defeat.”

F “I guess so…”

Re “Hey man, Fang… Don’t let it get to you so hard…”

Re “We just gotta get it out of your system’s all, right...?”

Re “Like, y’know, get it all out now so you don’t have to later, yeah…?”

Re “Like Trish said…”

T “I never said that.”

Re “Cuz’, that’s how these things work, right? You know until you don’t, and then
all the rest is wack.”

T “I… Guess?”

T “What?”

-- Re "Raptor's like me have experience with this sort of thang."

-- T "What you talkin bout Reed?"

-- Re "Dinos do wrong to each other sometimes and in that way the force of the
earth comes around the moon and at that presence the dirt, it overshadows the grass
so you're like: ‘I can't cut this grass there's no sun comin' through.’ “

-- Re “So in order to enable each other, the two fruits need to look each other in
the eye and understand we can only be ripe as the ripe is wrong. You know what I
mean?"

-- T "..."

-- T "Man. I never thought I'd see the day where the only person talkin any sense
was you, Reed."

Re “It’s like the bigger picture, you got Fang playin’ bass with all us…”

Re “And they’re all ‘ohh yeah good thing I’m not thinking about playing other
instruments, yeah yeah,’”

Re “And you’re all like ‘see, I told you so’...”

T “Yeah, so we should let them play now to get it all out for later!”

T “Wait…”

“If there were any cameras rolling, they’d be zooming in on Trish’s face.”

F “Thanks, Reed.”

T “Yeah, thanks a lot.”

>>Move to Convergence Point

>>Convergence Point

F “Alright, this time we’re doing I Gave The Special Kids The Jonestown Special And
Now I’m Going To Jail!”

“...I’m gonna need Raptor Jesus after this one...”

F “And a three, two, and…”

“Opposed to the nostalgic tune earlier, Fang rapidly strums on her borrowed
guitar.”

“It’s fast and rough but the tone carried doesn’t melt my eardrums.”

“Watching and listening now I can see and hear the difference clear as day.”

“They’re actually not bad.”

“Not good, not by any metric worth it’s weight.”

“But at least I don’t cringe so hard my spleen erupts from my side and creates a
splash zone.”

“I find myself bobbing to the song, in fact.”


“And just as I consider the song ‘gittin’ gud’ it ends.”

“I feel a little disappointed that the show ended so soon.”

“Then I remember it’s not a show at all.”

“And that I definitely won.”

“There’s sweat dripping from Fang’s brow, and her black clothes are clinging to her
a bit more tightly.”

“The grin on her face stands out the most though.”

F “See! Totally better with a guitar Trish!”

A “Ha! I win!”

“Trish, Reed, and Fang turn to look at me.”

F “Oh… OH! OH GOD DAMN IT!”

A “So you’re now a normal band?”

F “I mean…”

“Trish scowls.”

T “A vote then. Who votes if we stick to drum and bass?”

“She’s the only one to raise her hand.”

T “fff… And against?”

“Even I raise my hands along with Reed and Fang.”

T “You stay out of this Skinnie!”

A “Skinnie?”

F “Yessss!”
Re “So like… do we gotta redo all the songs?”

F “It’s only one instrument line.”

F “Shouldn’t take too long.”

T “Ugh…”

T “There goes our main marketing strategy.”

“Marketing strategy? I thought she was a triceratops, not a rhinorex.”

“I’m abusing my good luck here so I probably should leave.”

A “That was very fun you guys, I hope I can see you all play more...again...better
now than it was before...uuuhhhh….”

A “We’re cool right? Bye!”

“As I move to the door Fang calls out.”

F “Wait!”

F “We uh…”

“I look to see her fidgeting onstage.”

F “We couuuld uh… OH! Feedback! We could use your feedback!”

T “We what?! Fang, from him!”

A “Wha-”

F “He’s been helpful! So why not? Reed, back me up here.”

Re “mmmm… Kay… Anon should stay… He’s a bro…”

T “REALLY?! BUT-”
F “Anon, you’ll stick around a while, right?”

A “If you guys’ll order some Dino-moe’s, sure.”

“The three of them just stare blankly.”

“Wait. Auditorium. Pizza.”

“Fuck.”

“Ohfuckohshitfortheloveofallthatisholywhynow.”

A “I-I mean, uhh…”

A “Actually, I have to go. Like, right now. So... Bye.”

F “Why? I can spring for pizza if you’re too broke.”

A “Nah nah nah, no need.”

A “Plus I just remembered, I have to do uh...important things.”

F “More important than our music?”

A “Err, yeah. See I have to go return a blu- a book!”

“Fucking hell mouth, don’t go slipping weebtalk now!”

A “See it’s WAAAAY overdue and I can NOT afford the late fee.”

--A “Like going to watch ANIME with my SENPAIS and we can have RAMEN.”

--“Whoops, hope they don’t figure anything out!!!!”

Re “Wait a minute…”

“?”

“I almost didn’t recognize Reed’s voice, he said that way too sharply”
Re “...the late date is like...two weeks...Are you up to something, Anon?”

“He sounds completely lucid and didn’t slur any words…”

“Oh no.”

“SHUT IT DOWN”

“SHUT IT DOWN”

“THE PINK CUBONE KNOWS”

A “It’s from the library near my place. Suuuper strict. Y’know how public libraries
are like.”

Re “riiiiiight.”

T “WILL YOU JUST FUCKING LEAVE ALREADY?”

“I love you, Trish.”

-- “We are gonna have the sweatiest hatefuck after school is over.”

A “sure, bye.”

“I scramble away to the exit. I turn to make my way out of there, on the stage I
hear…”

T “THANK YOU.”

“I uh….hear them chattering…”

F “Okay now how about ‘I’m Not Sure Why But The Burglar Joined My Threesome.”

“Don’t think about a Threesome with Trish and Fang, Don’t think about a threesome
with Trish and Fang, they’re meteor dodgers for crying out loud!”

“...”
“Ok, just for one second”

“Fuck.”

“...”

4. Music Class

“-The Following Monday Morning-”

“I haven’t been able to focus much lately.”

“My original plan is in absolute tatters.”

“As opposed to staying silent and not facing any conflict, I’m now all buddy-buddy
with the school reject club.”

“And then there’s Naser and Naomi as well, and all their issues…”

“At any moment I feel I’m going to get found out.”

“Trish would certainly beat me senseless.”

“Fang might as well…”

“Definitely Naser.”

“All this shit happening, I can’t even get into my favorite hobby.”

“I don’t think I’ve made a single forum post in three days.”

“I stare down at my phone screen and see a sea of threads to post in.”

“And yet, I have nothing to say.”

“Wait, it’s already seven?!”

“Fuck me, I dragged my feet too much!”

“I sprint the rest of the way to school.”


“Luckily, I’m able to slink into homeroom without the teacher molesting me for a
tardy pass.”

“Classes tick by in the daily slog, and like all things, lunch eventually comes to
pass.”

“I grab a packaged lunch from the omnivore line and begin looking for a place to
sit.”

“By now it’s a foregone conclusion, I already know what happens next.”

N “Anon!”

“Right on cue.”

“Naomi rushes over, followed by Naser. I’d really rather not deal with her anymore
today.”

N “Come on, Anon, let's continue our conversation from earlier!”

N “You know, about extracurriculars like the gardening club!”

“Urrrrrgh…”

A “I don’t think I have the time. I’m way behind in some of my classes already.”

N “You’re talking about Music, aren’t you.”

Nas “Naomi, please stop memorizing the schedules of the new students.”

N “Sorry, it’s necessary for record keeping.”

"Naomi places a finger on her chin for a moment and stares into space. Suddenly,
her face lights up."

N "Wait, don’t you share it with Fang? Why not ask her, I’m sure she’d lend a
hand!"

A "I dunno... she’s usually busy with her own work, and I don’t want to bother her
more than I already do every day."
N "It can’t hurt to ask, though, right? Just a thought."

“I need to think of something, and fast.”

A “Err, sorry. I already promised Fang I’d be eating with her.”

“Smooth.”

N “Oh...”

N “Oh!”

N “I’m glad to hear you’re trying to be better friends with Fang!”

Nas “Well hey, this is a welcome surprise!”

Nas “...I suppose.”

A “Right. Actually, she doesn’t eat in the cafeteria, does she?”

Nas “Didn’t Fang tell you? They hang out with their band in the auditorium.”

A “She’s allowed to do that?”

N “I’ve asked Principal Spears before, he sees no issue with it.”

A “Huh. Anyways, I uh… Don’t want to keep them waiting!”

Nas “See you.”

N “Have fun!”

A “Right. Bye!”

“I turn away from the two and leave them behind.”

“...”

“Now that I’m in front of the auditorium when it isn’t crowded for once, I can get
a decent look around the foyer.”
“The walls are as vine-covered as anywhere else in the building, but the ones here
have small magenta flowers blooming on them here and there.”

“I suppose there’s different kinds of vines, wouldn’t make much sense otherwise.”

“Never really thought about it until now.”

“I open the door enough to see Fang’s gang lazing about within.”

“Reed is messing with some box on a table, and Fang and Trish are sitting on the
first row of seats chattering to each other.”

“I put my hand on the doorhandle and hesitate a bit. Then I pull it open.”

“The squeak of the door echoes through the near empty auditorium, and immediately
all three turn their heads and stare.”

“There’s an awkward pause that goes on for just a bit too long. Eventually Fang
calls out from her seat.”

F “What the hell are you doing here, dweeb?

A “Hiding from Naomi.”

“Fang throws her head back and goes limp on the shitty wooden chair.”

F “UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGHHHHHH, THAT
BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH.”
“...”

A “...”

F “...”

A “...”

“Fang lifts her head back up.”

F “Fffffffine, you can stay.”


“I go sit a few yards away from Fang and Trish on the theater seat. Reed turns back
to that device he was messing with before. Turns out it’s a projector.”

“Nifty.”

A “You don’t like Naomi?”

F “What was your first fuckin’ clue? That stupid bitch, acting all high and mighty
all the time.”

T “Hey, Fang.”

F “”Oh look at me I’m super smart and nice to everyone and everyone likes me so if
you disagree with me I get the moral high ground no matter what!””

“Fang lets out some combination of a snort and a sigh.”

F “No different than Naser. What a couple.”

F “Ugh, whatever. What was she doing to bother you?”

A “She’s been pestering me about every little thing since school started.”

A “Granted, she’s been a big help in some cases, but jeez she’s overbearing
sometimes.”

T “Fang?.”

F “I’ll say. Sometime in the first semester she ended up helping me with a major
science project. We only had a day to do the whole thing.”

A “You waited until the last day for a major grade?”

F “It… That doesn’t matter. Shut up.”

F “Anyways, Naomi insisted on helping me, and I just went along with it. She ended
up just bossing me around for eight hours.”

T “HEY GUYS DID YOU FORGET I’M HERE TOO?!”

F “Oh, right. What were you talking about Trish?”


“Trish pulls a cardboard tube out of her backpack. She pops the top of the tube
open and pulls a rolled up poster out and unfurls it.”

T “This! Tada! Our first poster!”

A “VVURM DRAMA? That’s an… interesting name… and what’s with the date on it?”

F “Trish wants-“

T “We need to have an actual show! Not some dumb school show. We need actual people
who matter to show our genius to!”

“Genius? More like retardation.”

F “I don’t know, Trish.”

A “Yeeeaaaaahhhh I’m with Fang on this one.”

The glare Trish levels at me was akin to a very dull knife.

T “You don’t even know how good we are!”

T “That was simply a practice session!”

T “Since you’re Naser’s friend too, just know HE ruined our first concert. Right
Fang?

F “Ugh, yeah. If he hadn’t invited all those cocksuckers…”

A “Still I think-“

T “It doesn’t matter what YOU think!”

--T “Now can you smeeeeeeeeeeeelelelelelelelel what. The Trish. Is. Cooking?”

“Whoa, where did that come from.”

F “Let’s drop it for now. My tuna sandwich is getting cold.”

“Trish grins in victory.”


Re “Dude… ya got told…”

“What the fuck am I doing? I’m dead if I out myself here outnumbered”

“Trish tore at me like she knew I was there.”

“Had to happen EVENTUALLY.”

“I hope that’s not the case.”

“I finally get to opening my omnivore lunch. A BLT, some chicken nuggets, and an
orange.”

“I take my first bite of the sandwich and-”

“*DING-DONG BING-BONG*”

“Are you kidding me.”

“I cram as much of the sandwich into my mouth as I can and close the box.”

“Reed pushes the projector to the corner of the room, and Trish makes for the exit
with Fang. I follow after, cheeks still filled with food”

“Next class is… Music, that’s right. I’ll be walking with Fang then.”

“The three all wave each other goodbye and Fang turns towards our shared class.”

“May as well make some small talk.”

A “So, uh… What’s your favorite band, Fang?”

F “My favorite band, huh…”

F “Guess it’d be something like The Skinks… Maybe the Fossillies?”

A “‘Oi, tha’ ‘ere’s sum pre’ey bri’ish tayste, yeah?”

F “Pffft.”
“She turns away to hide her snickers.”

F “Shut it.”

F “I’m sure your favorite is much better.”

A “I’m into…”

>>Boomer rock
>>Obscure hipster shit
>>Anime openings and video game OSTs

>>>REGARDLESS OF SELECTION

“Fang holds a hand up to her beak.”

F “AHAHAHAHAHAHHA. God you are such a dweeb”

“I flash her my biggest shit-eating grin.”

A “Least I don’t need a ‘loisence’ to listen to it.”

F “Oi luv, didn’ share me taystes to get rallied on, bit rewd, innit?”

“The two of us banter with each other with increasingly strong british accents all
the way to class.”

“...”

“ARGH!! This stupid-“

“Define a Treble clef? I don’t know what a Treble clef is! I don’t care about
this shit, it won’t ever be useful.”

“Fuck this, who can I cheat off of?”

“I lean back in my uncomfortable chair hoping to pop my spine back in place.”

N “Oh! What if you asked Fang for help?


“I crane my head, looking for Fang. At her own desk she’s filling out her
assignment page easily, drumming her fingers on her desk. Almost looks like she’s
strumming honestly.”

“Agh, and that’s another thing. Who the fuck made guitars?! Fuck trying to memorize
frets or whatever the fuck.”

“Oh shit, she’s looking at me now.”

“She tilts her head and taps her sheet.”

“OH!”

“I respond with an eyeroll and finger gun at my temple. My thumb hammer drops and I
fake die in my seat.”

“Fang shakes her head, returning to her assignment with a tiny smile gracing her
beak.”

“I look at the papers we need to finish. Fuck me, how the hell are we suppose to
finish these by the end of class?!”

N “It can’t hurt to ask, though, right?

“Maybe the Neon Nero had a good point.”

“Still, interrupting her now might piss her off.”

“FFFFFfuck. I’ll flip a coin.”

>>> Heads, ask Fang for help


>>> Tails, leave Fang alone

>> Heads, ask Fang for help

“Guess that’s that. May as well get it over with.”

“I slink out of my chair and go around to Fang’s desk.”

A “Uh....”
“She jumps in her chair.”

F “How’d you get- don’t scare me like that!”

A “Sorry…”

“I look at her work and see she’s only a quarter done. Fuck, I hope we have enough
time.”

A “sooo… You seem to be capable of deciphering dead languages.”

F “Wha-”

A “canyouhelpmewiththis?!”

F “Help you with the assignment?”

A “....Yes. I don’t get any of this. It’s all moon runes to me.”

F “Why’d you even join this class?”

A “Only elective that had an open spot. Even though it’s mid semester and I’m
expected to be at the level of everyone that’s been here all year.”

“Fang leans her head down and holds her hand on top of her muzzle.”

“I’m guessing that’s supposed to be like pinching the bridge of your nose.”

F “Whatever, it’s fine if the teacher gives the greenlight.”

Re “It’ll be fine.”

“Fang and I jump several inches.”

F “What are you doing here?!”

A “And what’s with the costume?”

Re “Gotta get a signature for this absent note, man…”


Re “Anyways... Mr. Jingo doesn’t care about if you use, like, partners and stuff…
He just wants the work done…”

A “I… I see. I didn’t know you were also the school mascot, Reed.”

Re “There’s, like, pockets in here man… You get to bring a lot of cool stuff… As
long as you clean it after…”

“I’m not even going to bother at this point.”

F “Thanks, Reed.”

Re “s’all good, man…”

“Reed gets up and goes to the teachers’ desk in the corner of the room.”

“I turn back to Fang expectantly.”

F “I’m not getting up. Get your crap and sit down already.”

A “Thanks.”

“...”

>>>transition to convergence point

>>Tails, leave Fang alone.

“Guess that settles it.”

“Fang wouldn’t want to be bothered right now anyways.”

“Looking back to my paper, I try once again to make sense of the questions and
music notes.”

“ “Write the following notes in both Treble and Bass clef.” “

“...What?”

Re “Yo, you should have like... asked Fang for help, man…”
“I have to grab the desk to keep myself from falling out of my chair.”

A “Reed, what the fuck are you doing here?!”

Re “Just getting an absent note signed by teach, man…”

A “And what’s with the outfit?!”

Re “School mascots are pretty cool… You wouldn’t believe the things they let you do
with these…”

“I’m not going to ask for clarification.”

Re “But, uhh… You should get some help or something…”

Re “I’ll ask the teacher for you…”

A “No, Reed, you don’t have to-”

Re “YO, TEACH! THIS GUY NEEDS SOME EXTRA HELP!”

“All eyes turn to us. The desk makes a nice ‘conk’ sound when my head hits it.”

Mr. Jingo “Does he really?”

Mr. Jingo “Err… Someone… Fang! You help him with the packet.”

“Fang glares daggers at the two of us.”

A “Thanks, Reed.”

Re “Hey, no problem man! I gotta go…”

“Reed shuffles over to the teachers’ desk in the corner to get his signature.”

“Fang calls out from her chair.”

F “I’m not getting up. If you need help grab your stuff and get over here.”
“The damage is done. May as well at this point.”

“...”

>>>Transition to convergence point

>>>>Convergence point

F “Jesus... you suck at this”

A “No shit, I don’t know what half this shit is!”

F “God, they tell you about treble notes in Elementary, it’s E, G, B, D, F for
treble and G, B, D, F, A for bass!”

A “How the hell do you know any of this”

“Anon then realized, he is horrendously fucking stupid.”

F “I’ve been into playing music since pre-k”

“... Roll with it”

A “So does it take that long to learn that horrid thing?”

“I point at the class’ electric guitar”

F “Nah, I started with piano. I didn’t get my first guitar ‘til freshman year.”

A “The piano? Isn’t that the hardest one?”

“I have no clue what i'm talking about”

F “Maybe for some, but I started early and got ahead. My grandma had an old piano
she would let me mess around with.”

F “She would try to get me to play all kinds of songs, mostly church stuff because
she wanted me to be a little goodie two shoes like she was. It... was fun.”

F “Then I started taking piano lessons privately because my mom saw that I was
interested in it, and in middle school I joined the band for awhile!”
F “Only quit because of marching season, I was not wearing a dumb uniform.”

“Fang gets a strange expression, a mix between a blush and a scowl as she returns
back to her snappy attitude.”

F “You done with that yet? It's taking you way too long, rather have you out of my
way.”

“Cute.”

“I show her the half-finished worksheet.”

A “I still don’t get this fucking part.”

F “It’s literally three classifications, it’s really easy”

A “It doesn’t list them!”

F “Did you even read the page?”

“Fang then grabs the paper and points at the top right. In a small box is a list
of three types, woodwind, brass, and percussion.”

A “Oh...”

F “You need me to still help you with this or do you have it from here?”

“Of course I have it, I know this shit, it's just three catagories”

“Percussion is simple enough. Getting the differences between woodwind and brass is
a bit harder.”

A “Right. You know your stuff. Band stuff.”

“I heard a sigh from Fang”

F “I can’t believe this.”

A “What is it?”
F “Why did you leave your old school?”

A “Wh-”

A “Where did that come from?”

F “Just wondering, though I think I know the answer.”

A “Why do you care?”

F “You’re here for just two weeks and already you’ve wedged yourself in with my
friends.”

A “I didn’t really have a choice there, Fang.”

A “I just...wanted to cruise through this year. I’m not good with friends.”

F "Sorry, just had a feeling. I myself haven’t gotten many new friends in a few
years..."

F “It’s like I make people avoid me... I don’t like new people…”

A "That's weird."

F "Fuck em', you know?"

A "Sure."

F “You act like you have a hard time socializing, I’m not seeing it.”

F “Makes me think you didn’t leave your school out of necessity, but because you
really must have fucked up royally.”

F “I know your kind.”

“I-I, what did Fang mean by that? It all just came out of nowhere - I mean jeez-”

“We’re talking about how she can’t get friends and now she wants to know about
THAT…”
“Oh God. I’m getting hot.”

“It’s Trish. She told Fang and she knows everything.”

“Play dumb? Hopefully that will work.”

A “I have no clue what you’re talking about.”

F “Honestly? Me neither.

F “You’re just some loser that knows NOTHING about music.”

F “And yet you come in from your cave where even their parents must’ve wanted you
gone.”

F “But still you’re now BOTH my science and music partner, on top of worming your
way in with MY band and with MY friends-”

F “Anon, what is there TO understand?”

“She’s laughing.”

A “...”

F “Hey, you ok?”

A “...”

F “That’s funny, come on.”

A “...”

A “Haha.”

F "I'll almost miss you when you leave and start finding your own friends."

A “Whatever you say, Fang.”

"With a roll of her eyes she returns to scrolling through her phone again. I
seriously wonder now what she meant."
F "I gotta go."

A "Y-you’re leaving so soon?"

F "I’m going to the bathroom, stupid."

“...”

“She knows.”

“But how?!”

“She left her phone on the desk.”

“I can see the imprint of the password being illuminated by the room’s lamps”

“It… It wouldn’t be right.”

“...I have to know.”

“I reach over to pick up the phone.”

“Some movement in the corner of my eye solidifies me.”

“Why’s Reed still here?!”

Re “...”

A “...”

Re “... {i}*snrrrk*{/i}”

“Oh thank Raptor Jesus. He’s asleep.”

“Fang’s password is…”

“Wait, only the ‘one’ key is smudged?”

“I guess it’s worked until now…”


“Ah, the messenger app.”

-- joy, refer to jingo for the entirety of the texting part as he wants it to be
more interactive.

Monday, January 6th

>absolutely can't wait! I'm livid!


>told naser to fuck off.

Tuesday, January 7th

fang! where did you go?

>Went home.
>Ward to explain.
>Cried a lot.
>I fucking hate naser so much.
>I don't know what to do now.

T___T
fang, don't worry
they're jackasses, all of them
we'll get back at them
you're very special

>I can't eat. I can't get out of bed.


>I feel so lost, like I won't amount to anything in life.
>Or that my life isn't gonna go anywhere.

yes it will.
we'll make it.
do you want me to come over?

>No.

see you at school tomorrow, then?

>Fuck no.

want me to come over then?


========we only see this if we don't scroll up=============

>Maybe.
>You haven't come over in weeks.
>I miss you a lot. Wish you were right here with me.

Trust me, fang


I will help you
like always.

><3 ;w; <3

January 9th

You coming?

>Yeah :V
>I feel better

So glad! ;;;;w;;;;

>Hopefully sage is still my science partner


>It's been a while...

January 16

>Haven't seen naser all day


>Good. fuck him and naomi to hell
>Will tell you what happened when i get there

hear hear <3!!!!


You coming to school?

>probably

Today, January 21st

>Didn't miss much schoolwork, thank god


>Yesterday was weird

see you at the auditorium at lunch?


>Yeah, after science period
>Need some update from you
>Cya <3333

“... There’s surprisingly not a lot.”

“Seems they interact mostly in person.”

“...What did I even just accomplish?”

“I shouldn’t have looked.”

“All because of my paranoia… I just violated someone’s privacy.”

“I can feel a pit open in my stomach.”

“I shouldn't have done it.”

“Trish is Fang’s friend. Not me.”

“God damn it, Anon. The fuck is wrong with you.”

“I set the phone back where it was.”

“A glance back at Reed and I confirm that he’s still unconscious.”

“What’s another secret to keep?”

“Each one just building on the last, the growing maw in my gut threatens to make me
violently ill.”

F “Oi!”

“I’m startled as Fang retakes her seat.”

F “Did you manage to do {i}anything{/i} on the sheet?”

“I simply shake my head as I show her the incomplete worksheet.”

“Fang sighs frustratedly.”


A “Look if I’m being a bother-”

F “It’s simple you dweeb.”

“Fang began breaking down the questions, her tone less condescending than when we
initially started.”

“The way she explained it was infinitely better than how Mr. Jingo did at the start
of class.”

“Over time the sheet was slowly filled in, things finally starting to click now.”

F “Looks like you got the hang of this bit. Good job, dork.”

“Fang smirks a bit.”

“I see a chance to strike.”

A “Helps to have an actual decent teacher.”

“The slight red tint tells me I was right on the mark.”

“There’s also the steady *thump thump thump* of her tail on the back of her seat to
clue me in. I can’t help thinking of tugging on the appendage.”

“Wait, the thumping.”

“*Thump thump… thump thump thump… thump thump… thump thump thump*”

A “Hey uh… Is… Is your tail drumming right now?”

F “Hm? Oh, that. Kinda.”

A “Kinda?”

F “I’m feeling out a rhythm. Thinking of a new song.”

A “Is that normally part of the creative process?”

F “Maybe, maybe not. Are you done with the packet yet?”
“I groan.”

A “Still got half a page left.”

F “That’s just a crossword puzzle. I’m not helping if you can’t do even that.”

A “I know, I know.”

“I have to resort to good ol’ logic to solve the crossword. The longest and
shortest words are easy enough to figure out.”

A “But, uhh…”

F “Hm?”

A “Thanks for helping me. With the assignment I mean.”

F “Uhh… Yeah. Sure.”

“There’s that red tint again.”

F “I’ll help again… I mean, if you need it.”

A “Really? Thanks.”

F “Yeah, just-”

“*DING-DONG BING-BONG*”

“That’s the bell telling us to piss off to the last period. Shit, I still got a few
words left.”

“I guess the last few words and rush over to the teachers’ desk to turn it in. When
I turn back I catch sight of Fang leaving the room in a hurry, tail between her
legs.”

Nas “Sh-they’re not that bad once you get to know them.”

“Guess he was right after all.”


“God, I feel like a jerk now.”

“...”

5. Gardening Club
“It’s been a couple of days since I snooped on Fang’s phone.”

“The guilt still weighs on me, but I’ve found a way to cope with it.”

“Even more aggressive shitposting on a Hungarian steak sampling vlogsite.”

“And I would be enjoying my day by myself in my apartment playing games and


shitposting.”

“It’s Saturday after all.”

“Except I’m walking to school.”

“Fuck my life.”

“As it turns out the school keeps a log of what the wifi bandwidth goes to.”

“And the IT guy probably wasn’t too thrilled to see I’d been using it to download
the entire Saturnia collection.”

“Spears sentenced me to one week ‘Campus Beautification’ for using taxpayer money
on a few dozen gigs of videos.”

-- “‘And because your taste is shit, Anon,’ or so he said.”

“Well, now I know to space the torrenting out a bit more.”

“As I get closer to the dreaded building, the more the thought of ditching crosses
my mind.”

“But then the thought of Principal Spears pops up and violently pile drives it into
a prius. Weird thought but enough to discourage me from ditching.”

“So here I am now walking to the side and where the gardens of the school are.”

“I can see others are here as well, probably all for detention too.”
“Wait a sec. Isn’t that Fang? Why is she talking to that green weirdo from before?”

“Wait another sec. Are they getting closer?”

“No, I am.”

“Why did I walk up to them?!”

“Seeing Fang only makes the guilt more intense.”

“I cast my gaze aside instead.”

“The flower bulbs are still closed for the winter, but a few are peeking out.”

Ro “I see you are admiring our work! The gardening club takes much pride in our
flowers!”

“BWAHSHIT!”

“For such a… large--THICC… girl she’s surprisingly stealthy.”

St “Good morning, Rosa! Ready for today?”

Ro “Si! It is a beautiful day for gardening, isn’t it?”

A “Err… you WANT to be here?”

F “Rosa’s the head of the gardening club.”

“Judging by Fang’s tone, she’s been through this kind of detention multiple times
already.”

Ro “Oh! Does he wish to join our club? Is that why he is here? Stella! Stella, we
have a new member!”

St “Oh, wonderful!”

“My eyes are drawn to the green stego, who I immediately recognize from that
encounter with the cards.”

A “Hey, you’re that weird stego from the other day.”


“Her smile falters ever so slightly. Did I get the wrong person?”

St “My name is Stella… And I’m not weird…”

A “Right. So what was with the Pocket Raptor cards?”

St “I was just saying what my tarot guidebook told me…”

St “The, uh… work of an astrologer is to show people what fate has in store for
them.”

St “And that’s what I do!”

A “Astrologer? Really?”

St “But there will always be those who aren’t able to accept what their fortune
tells.”

A “A, that’s retarded. two, astrology is retarded. And thirdly, that sounds like
something from a bad video game.”

St “N-no! I uh… awwwww…”

“The sulky stego is pulled into a hug by the happy hispanic girl.”

Ro “There there, Stella. You’re still my friend no matter how much of the black
arts you believe.”

F “Pfft, you’re one to talk about ‘believing black arts’, Rosa.”

F “You and your magic dino in the sky.”

Ro “Pagana… you’re lucky I don’t-”

Sp “GET ALL YOUR ASSES OUT FRONT RIGHT NOW!”

“The caveman’s bellow reverberates throughout the entire school, even though I’m
pretty sure he wasn’t using the PA system.”

“Not wanting to piss him off even more, I follow the others to where Principal
Spears has a few other students gathered in front of him.”

“The only one I recognize is the guy Trish had in a headlock that one day.”

F “Didn’t expect you of all people to get detention.”


“It takes me a moment to realize Fang is talking to me.”

A “I, er... used too much of the school bandwidth.”

F “What, Spears catch you downloading porn in the library or something?”

A “No! Just torrenting, like, TV shows that I can’t get on cable.”

“She raises an eyebrow like she doesn’t believe me but doesn’t follow it up.”

“She must never find out about Saturnia.”

Sp “I’m glad you could make it, Anon. I think that’s just about everyone.”

“Not that he gave me much of a choice.”

Sp “Alright, I’m sure you’re all familiar with Rosa, she’ll be supervising you for
campus beautification today.”

Sp “If I hear a bad word from her about any of you…”

--Sp “There’s a perfectly good Subaru in the parking lot with your name on it”

“I think I can fill in the rest.”

“Spears nods to Rosa, who reminds me of Naomi with how overly happy she looks.”

Ro “Thank you all so much for coming out to help with campus beautification today!”

Ro “If we all work hard and have a good time we can get done before you know it!”

“How can anyone be so enthusiastic about coming to school on the weekend?”

Ro “So by the end of the day we need to get weeding done in the gardens, as well as
replanting older flowers, and some of the vines are ready to be trimmed back!”

F “{i}*groan*{/i}”

St “Make sure you all get a pair of gloves, and to return them before you leave!”

“Fang raises her hand.”

Ro “Fingerless don’t count.”

“Fang lowers her hand.”


St “You should all pair off now to split the work evenly, decide amongst
yourselves.”

“Even in detention, the partner curse haunts me.”

“Everyone else almost immediately groups off.”

“Leaving just me and take a wild guess who else.”

F “I don’t like how often this is happening.”

A “Can’t say I’m a big fan either.”

F “Whatever, let’s just take vine trimming and get this over with.”

“Fang starts heading to one of the ladders already set up near the wall.”

A “Wait, don’t you need gloves?”

F “What? I’m not a wuss.”

F “You get some if you’re so concerned about getting a few cuts.”

“I just don’t get this chick sometimes.”

“I get a pair of gloves and some loppers and rejoin Fang at the ladder.”

F “Alright cool, gimme the snippy thing.”

A “I don’t like the idea of you with a weapon very much.”

“She flashes an evil grin.”

F “Hold the ladder steady while I do this.”

F “I’ve been here a few times, this is the easiest job of the three.”

A “If you say so…”

“Fang is quick to scale the ladder, leaving me to hold it in place.”


“I wish I could shitpost on my phone right now to distract myself but my hands are
occupied.”

“Fang’s disregard of me is made extremely clear as she carelessly lets the remnants
of dead vines rain down on my head.”

“Kind of glad I don’t have hair because I can’t imagine how bad it would be to have
these sticky plant bits tangled in it.”

F “Oi! Shift the ladder over!”

A “But you’re still on it.”

F “Don’t feel like getting down. Come on, you can’t be that weak.”

“Whatever. I shimmy the ladder to the side, Fang’s weight making the process more
difficult.”

“Damn my scrawny arms.”

F “Alright this is good.”

“She goes back to clipping vines and dropping them on my head.”

“It’s started building up on my shoulders and neck now.”

“And now the spots the vines have touched start to itch.”

A “Hey.”

“She remains focused on the vines, dropping the largest clump directly on my face.”

A “HEY!”

“Nevermind. The follow up clump was even bigger and lands right in my mouth.”

“After I finish spitting the wad of dead vegetation from my mouth I try one last
time to get her attention.”

A “FANG!”
“Through my blurred vision I can make out Fang’s tail, slowly shifting side to
side.”

“And an evil idea comes to mind to get her attention.”

“There’s a less evil one, too, something that’d just shock her.”

>>Tug her tail


>>Tug her ankle

“I reach out to her when she drops another clump into my eyes, blinding me.”

“I blindly grasp at her until my fingers brush against something covered in


scales.”

“I give the appendage a sharp tug.”

“There’s a shrill cry above me. That got her attention.”

A “Stop dropping shi-”

“Suddenly stars explode in my sight impaired eyes and I fall backwards.”

“There’s a ringing in my ears and I try to blink the vines and stars away.”

F “NEVER. DO THAT. AGAIN.”

“Do what? The fuck did I do?”

F “Fucking pervert.”

A “What the fuck did I DO?!”

“When I can finally see again Fang has her wings drawn together behind her and her
hands clasped on something also behind her.”

“I think I fell in the flowerbed behind us. It’s actually sort of soft.”

F “You pulled my TAIL!”


“Play it cool, Anon.”

A “I thought that was your ankle!”

“Smooth recovery.”

F “Why the fuck would you think my TAIL was my ANKLE?!”

A “Because I couldn’t see because YOU kept dropping fucking vines in my eyes!”

F “So you pull my fucking tail you perverted fuck!”

A “You weren’t listening to me when I was trying to tell you to stop!”

“We’re both out of breath and staring daggers at each other.”

“My eyes are still bleary and starting to itch now because of the plants.”

“Fang is still protectively holding her tail as if I’ll pull it again.”

F “Wha-why is your face all red?”

A “I was {i}trying{/i} to tell you!”

A “These vines fuckin’ hurt!”

F “That makes no sense at all.”

F “Oh wait. Yeah. Humans.”

“She tosses another discarded vine on my face.”

A “Cut that out!”

F “Hah!”

A “I could report you for allergy abuse.”

F “That’s the weakest threat I’ve ever heard.”


F “Actually, in general you seem a bit milquetoast around people.”

F “What gives?”

“I start prying off some of the vines stuck to my clothes.”

A “It’s like, why waste time on certain people, you know?”

A “It wouldn’t be worth my time to do something crazy.”

“Fang leans forward on the ladder, pretending to be hurt.”

F “Aww, I’m not worth your time?”

A “Some people certainly aren’t.”

A “Just never meant to amount to anything or do anything important.”

“She drops the smug expression for a second.”

--A “Like BIIC. That’s a pretty crazy game.”

--F “Yeah, it is. I myself couldn’t get past the sewer dungeon.”

--A “Wooow, only the second dungeon in the game.”

--F “Piss off, I have stuff to do. Can’t waste it on garbage indie games.”

--A “Garbage? BIIC is the iliad of our time.”

--F “You’re kidding.”

--A “No, I’m serious. The postmodern elements are portrayed twofold, once as a red
herring, which is what most people notice.”

--A “But further, what people don’t notice, is the metanarrative that plays on the
red herring of the pseudometa narrative.”

--F “Get on with it.”


--A “Right. Argraks is an audience surrogate, he exists to make the player
uncomfortable on purpose.”

--A “The game is perfectly crafted to wasting the audiences’ time with frivolity
and pointless plot points, and unachievable endings that highlight how the
audience, unlike a character, cannot undergo true character development.”

--F “Just how much thought have you put into this?”

--A “I’ve completed the game one-hundred percent on new game plus three times.”

--F “Have you considered a job?”

F “Anyways, you should get up.”

F “Rosa will kill you if she sees you crumpled in her stupid flowers.”

“A yell echoes from somewhere across the schoolgrounds.”

Ro “He {i}WHAT{/i}.”

F “Shit, hurry up!”

A “Hang on…!”

“I try leaning up. The bush has intertwined with my clothes.”

A “I’m stuck!”

F “You actual…!”

“Rosa scrambles over and starts pulling at her hair when she sees me stuck in the
bush.”

Ro “Wh-yo-why- ARGH!”

Ro “¡ESTÚPIDA, MADERA Y PIES DE CERDO EXCUSA PARA UN HOMBRE!”

Ro “Wait… Your position…”


“She points a burning finger up at Fang.”

Ro “Did {i}you{/i} push him!”

“Fang’s skin goes a shade paler.”

A “Uh... no, I fell on my own.”

A “Sorry…”

Ro “SORRY? What kind of idiota torpe manages to fall that hard into my Middlemist
Red Camelias that hard on his own?!?”

“I shrug apologetically.”

Ro “I just… URGH! Do you have {i}any{/i} idea how long it takes for those to
bloom!”

Ro “Name! What is your name!”

A “Er, Anon…”

Ro “An-on! Why are you still in there? Get up niño, get up!”

“She grabs one of my hands and wHOA-”

A “You trying to rip my arm off?”

“She grabs a bicep proudly.”

Ro “I say all the time. Outside work is good for your health!”

F “Think I’ll stick to stealing the occasional protein bar from Nasers’ stock.”

Ro “Wait, An-on, why is your face so red?”

A “The uh, vines. Guess I have an allergy.”

Ro “Oh, no, no no! You must stop working vines then!”


“She points back up to Fang.”

Ro “You! Get down from there, you are both switching to weeds!”

F “{i}Uuuuughhhhh…{/i}”

F “...Alright, whatever.”

Ro “Go, go now! And no more tripping!”

“We go exchange our equipment for weeding trowels.”

“Once we get directed to a place in the dirt to start, Fang and I diligently
continue in silence for a bit.”

F “... Why did you lie earlier?”

A “Hm?”

F “About how I kicked you.”

A “Uhh…”

A “Spur of the moment, I guess?”

A “Seemed like the easiest way out of getting in more trouble?”

F “... Sure.”

A “What do you mean sure?”

F “Sure it was the easiest way to get out of trouble?”

A “Uh… ”

F “Why did you {i}really{/i} do it?”

A ”What do you mean?”


F “You know, your reasons, real reasons? Your recta ratio.”

A “Recta ratio? Fancy words outta you.”

A “But I don’t understand...”

F “You fucking moron what was your motives? Why would you care?”

A “Uhh… ”

“I had to think about that for a moment. Why {i}did{/i} I do that...”

F “... You said something before.”

F “About how some people won’t ever amount to anything.”

A “Oh, uh, yeah. That was, uh…”

F “What did you mean by that?”

“Why the fuck is she so curious?”

A “I dunno, you’d probably think I’m some creep for saying this…”

F “I already think you’re a creep.”

A “Fair but fuck you regardless.”

“Her retort is a prominent flipping of the bird.”

A “I dunno, It’s like, the world is too full.”

A “And there’s only gonna be more people as time goes on.”

A “Eventually we’ll run out of food and resources, but culture will be too far gone
to really fix anything.”

“Fang stops digging for a moment and gives an attentive stare out of the corner of
her eye.”
A “Midwits and morons have kids like crazy. The number of smart people in the world
remains stagnant.”

A “Or even goes down over time.”

A “Nobody is immune to propaganda, and useful people can be indoctrinated right


into the crowds.”

A “Y’know?”

F “...”

A “Told you it’d sound weird.”

F “No, actually, that’s… Wow.”

F “That’s actually exactly how I feel about things!”

“She what?”

“Fang is acting strangely enthusiastic all of a sudden.”

F “Right like, in all of history, if you {i}really{/i} look at it, the smart people
have never even once had to answer to the excess.”

F “Back in the day, innovation was propelled by smart people working with other
smart people.”

F “Trying all sorts of new things the masses would have hated.”

F “Like rock music, right?”

F “People hated that at first.”

F “When {i}my{/i} band takes off, I’ll get to rub it in everyone’s faces.”

F “All those cock goblins. It’s like everywhere you go, there’s a hundred dumb
people for one person worth anything.”

A “What’d you call it before? Excess?”


F “Yeah, like Naomi.”

A “Right.”

F “Most people in the school, even.”

A “I can see it.”

F “... Maybe Reed? Not sure.”

“...?”

F “Rosa and Stella, definitely.”

“What the-”

F “Naser, too, unfortunately. Oh, well.”

F “All of them, sheep.”

“Too casually brush everyone aside like that…”

“What does she think of me, then?”

A “If you think so little of Rosa and Stella and everyone, why hang out with them?”

F “... I don’t like being alone. You don’t need to know any more.”

F “As long as they aren’t the sort of people that showed up that day at our
concert…”

F “Those lazy, talentless, inconsiderate, self-righteous, condescending excuses for


peers.”

F “Thinking they can just make fun of our music.”

A “Haha, yeah, those guys sucked. Their insults weren’t even that creative.”

“Fang’s arm jerks back violently, pulling a bundle of weeds and topsoil out and
onto my jacket.”
A “Hey-”

F “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Her eyes scrutinize me thoroughly.”

“But why-”

“Oh.”

“Oh shit.”

“My foot tastes a bit salad-like today. Damn gardening.”

A “Er, just… gossip I heard from classmates afterwards?”

“We both know that’s a lie.”

“I feel anxious as Fang continues watching me.”

“I watch it happen, as if in slow motion, as comprehension dawns on Fang.”

“Her voice is low.”

“Accusatory.”

F “...you were at the show?”

“My heart stops.”

“There it is.”

“I couldn’t have hoped to hide it forever.”

“Fang stands over me, her wings spread wide and her shoulders shaking.”

“I… how do I explain this?”

“We’re close enough friends now, right?”


“I could probably even joke about it a bit.”

>>Explain it to her honestly, she should understand by now


>>Joking is a good way to move past mistakes.

>>Explain it to her honestly, she should understand by now

“I guess honesty is the best policy.”

A “Well, Naser did invite me to your concert... and I did end up going.”

“Fang’s expression hardens and she crosses her arms.”

A “He told me there’d be free food so I figured why not? It’s not like I knew it
was going to end up the way it did.”

F “So why did you tell us you didn’t go?”

A “Because I kept seeing your psycho friend hunting down everyone else who went,
why would I make myself a target?”

F “Trish was only looking for the dicks who…”

F “Did you laugh at us too?”

“She jabs an accusatory finger at me.”

A “Fang, I-”

F “Did. You. Laugh?”

“I open my mouth to answer but the words aren’t coming to me.”

“Fang seems to pick up on my inability to answer.”

F “I fucking knew it.”

A “Look Fang, I’m sorry, right? I didn’t know-”

F “I can’t believe you right now!”

“Fang begins to storm off and I try to chase after her.”

A “Fang, wait!”

“But my self-defeating clumsiness seems to have a different plan and my foot


catches on the pile of discarded gardening tools.”
“The world spins and I land on my ass where we were weeding.”

“At least something broke my fall…”

“Wait. Isn’t this the flowerbed?”

“Suddenly an orange terror descends upon me like I set off some sort of alarm.”

Ro “FOLLANDO DEMONIO CALVO, QUITATE ESAS FLORES!!”

A “Err… Sorry?”

Ro “Dios mio, do you have any idea how long it takes those to bloom!”

Ro “And for you to just tumble onto them AGAIN!”

>>Go to convergence point

>>Joking is a good way to move past mistakes

“We’re good enough friends now, right? This’ll be fiiiine.”

A “I know that you guys sounded so bad you never made it past your intro.”

“Her eyes narrow. Eh, maybe if I…”

A “I was expecting dinner and a show, not a comedy skit.”

“I know I’m not the best comedian but still nothing?”

“No, wait, I think I hear some cracking.”

“Oh, that’d be her knuckles popping.”

“Fang’s face twists into a sneer and her hand slowly comes up into a fist.”

“I may have overestimated my comedic talents. Or our friendship.”

“My head snaps to the side, a burning sting radiating from my cheek.”
“My foot catches on the pile of discarded gardening tools.”

“The world spins and I land on my ass where we were weeding.”

“At least something broke my fall…”

“Wait. Isn’t this the flowerbed?”

F “You fucking asshole…”

“Fang storms off, shouldering past Rosa, who is stunned silent.”

“Rosa isn’t stunned for long though, and suddenly an orange terror descends upon me
like I set off some sort of alarm.”

Ro “FOLLANDO DEMONIO CALVO, QUITATE ESAS FLORES!!”

A “Err… Sorry?”

Ro “Dios mio, do you have any idea how long it takes those to bloom!”

>>Move to convergence point

>>convergence point

“I jump to my feet and quickly inspect the damage. The entire section of flowerbed
where I had landed was imprinted with my outline like a snow-angel.”

“Just my luck.”

A “Rosa, I didn’t mean-”

Ro “It doesn’t matter what you meant!”

Ro “Once is forgivable, but twice! TWICE!”

Ro “¡¡POR RAPTOR JESÚS QUEDARTE QUEDADO, TE GOLPEARÉ CON MI CHANCLA !!”

--Ro “ESTE CHANCLA MÍO BRILLA CON UN PODER IMPRESIONANTE!”

--Ro “SU PUÑO ARDIENTE ME DICE QUE TE DERROTE!”

--Ro “TOMA ESTO, MI AMOR, MI ENOJO Y TODO MI DOLOR!”


--Ro “SHINING CHANCLA!”

St “Whoa, whoa, whoa!!”

“I am saved by a green stegosaur grabbing the mighty arm of judgement out of the
air mid-swing.”

St “Rosa, remember what we talked about!”

“Steam erupts from Rosa’s nostrils like a bull.”

Ro “...”

St “Don’t use physical force to make people hurt, alright?”

A “Th-thank you St-”

St “That’s what manual labor is for, right?”

A “...”

Ro “...Yes… Yes, of course.”

Ro “You! An-on, you will help extra two hours after everyone else! Two!!”

A “For flowers?!”

Ro “For flowers!”

A “... Are you sure you wouldn’t rather just beat me?”

Ro “I can do both!”

St “Where did Fang go?”

A “I uh… Did something I shouldn’t have.”

A “She ran off…”

Ro “You ruin the flowers of friendship like you do of my labor!!”


St “You should go find Fang and apologize. And bring her back.”

St “If you don’t share someone’s pain, you can never understand them.”

“Did this bitch just quote Naruto of all things?

“If I weren’t being directed to leave I would have bailed anyways.”

A “I saw her going towards the parking lot, I’ll be right back.”

Ro “You better!”

“There aren’t many cars in the parking lot, so finding Fang shouldn’t be too hard
to find.”

“That pair of wings rustling in-between two parked cars is probably a hint, not
sure.”

“I silently approach, hiding behind the other cars in the lot.”

“She’s huddled around the passenger door of a garishly yellow minivan.”

“Wait, is she…?”

“Shit, I gotta stop her.”

A “Fang, what are you doing?!”

F “Fuck off, fuck-knuckle.”

A “...”

A “Fang, don’t break into a teachers’ car, we’ll get-”

F “Shut the fuck up cunt smuggler I’m focusing on this.”

A “...”

“I’m over it.”


A “Why are you doing this?”

F “... It’ll be fun.”

F “Hehehehe…”

F “Why, you want to join in on a joyride?”

“She looks at me like it’s a genuine question.”

A “No, I don’t.”

--refer to jingo for scene direction

A “Fang, what are you doing?!”

A “Stop kicking the car!!”

A “Damn it Fang!”

A “I don’t know what more to say,”

A “except I’m sorry.”

A “I messed up and that was a dick move,”

A “But if you keep this up we’ll both be going-”

F “What do you care?!”

F “We’re already in detention, what’s a FEW MORE DAYS?!”

A “... TO JAIL, FANG.”

F “GO.”

F “AWAY.”
A “YOU WANT TO GET OUR PARENTS INVOLVED?!”

“Fang stops kicking the glass, drained of energy and out of breath.”

“Thankfully, the glass isn’t even scratched.”

A “... You’re right for being angry at me, you’re talented and skilled, and I got
nothing to show for myself, and what I did was wrong..”

A “But you’re better than this, come on.”

F “...”

“Fang won’t look my direction.”

“At least she hasn’t started kicking the car again.”

“... Might be a good idea to give her some space.”

“All of a sudden I feel like I shouldn’t be here.”

??? “HEY!!”

??? “WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING TO MY CAR?!”

“We freeze.”

>>Get out of there.


>>GET OUT OF THERE.
>>GET THE FUCK OUT OF DODGE.

>>REGARDLESS OF DECISION

“Fang immediately bolts towards the front of the school.”

“I follow after, legs pumping furiously in an attempt to both catch up to Fang and
avoid the teacher screeching at us from behind.”

“I see Fang veer into the school, the door closing slowly after.”

“By the jacket on my back I’m able to slip in just before the door shuts
completely.”

“Fang is panting in the stairwell near the door. And I’m sure I’m redder than I was
earlier with the vines.”

F “Why… hah hah… did you… follow me?”

“Why?”

A “Be haaaaah… because… I’m sorry…”

“Her snear returns and she makes to turn away.”

A “I fucked up. Yes, I was at that concert. And yes, I laughed. I never expected to
actually become your friend.”

“Her wings block my view of her.”

“But she hasn’t left yet. Maybe I can fix this after all.”

A “I just wanted to coast through school. I was happy being a loner.”

A “I’ve always been one, after all.”

“Without a word Fang climbs the stairs.”

“Fuck.”

“I consider following but her silence was evidence enough she wants nothing to do
with me.”

“And standing here by myself I have time to think of my own admission.”

“If Fang leaves me alone, I’ll get exactly what I want. Right?”

“She could probably talk Trish and Reed into leaving me alone too.”

“I’ll get the easy life I wanted.”

“So why the fuck do I feel absolutely empty right now?”


“I sigh and slump over on the stairs.”

A “Can today get any worse?”

St “Karma would suggest yes.”

“Oh.”

“You know, I always thought that tempting fate thing was just a dumb cliche.”

“It still is. But maybe Stella has a good point about astrology.”

St “Rosa! I found our errant runaway!”

“I hear the shrill screech of a latina banshee approach.”

Ro “Where did you go?!”

Ro “You were supposed to get Fang and return! RETURN!!”

A “Oh… Right. Yeah, uh… Sorry.”

Ro “You will be sorry!”

St “There’s two hours left for the rest of the students, but that makes four for
you.”

Ro “Do not worry An-on! We stay as well!”

A “... Greaaat.”

“The next few hours were grueling hell.”

“Carrying bags of the most rancid smelling fertilizer back and forth…”

“Clearing entire sections of flowerbed of weeds using only a trowel…”

“Tilling the same flowerbeds by hand...”


“I don’t think the phrase ‘backbreaking labor’ was supposed to be literal.”

Ro “As is expected of hombres!”

“I could already tell that by the end of the day I would have crippling arthritis.”

“Fang returns eventually, but still won’t talk to me and just sticks nearby cutting
vines.”

“Only an hour has passed, but I’m about ready to sleep for days.”

Ro “An-on! We will now be replanting the flowers you destroyed!”

“‘Destroyed’ is a harsh word…”

A “But I don’t know anything about planting-”

Ro “You speak nonsense! Come here, now, I’ll teach you!”

“She motions me to get on my knees next to her and hands me a clump of dirt with a
juvenile daisy in it.”

Ro “I will dig the hole, you will place it in. Very simple!”

“I somehow almost drop the flower.”

A “Y-yeah…”

“I don’t even {i}want{/i} to think what would happen if I mess up a third time.”

“Rosa points up at Fang, who is still aggressively trimming back the vines.”

Ro “Fang, do you want to plant some, too?”

F “I’ll… pass.”

“With a practiced hand Rosa clears out a cylindrical hole deep enough for the clump
to go in.”

Ro “Okay, it’s ready.”


“My arms are practically rubber from today’s work and are faltering to the point
pieces of dirt are being shaken off.”

“A little bit from the hole, I have to catch the whole thing when it slips from my
grip.”

“Rosa puts her hands around mine to steady them before I drop it for real.”

Ro “Veeery easy, like this…”

“The bulb is placed in the hole and we let go.”

“Rosa quickly fills up the patch of dirt with the trowel, leaving only the stem and
flower visible.”

Ro “You did it!”

A “Doesn’t seem like I did much at all…”

Ro “Hush now. We still have dozens left to plant.”

“A keening whine rumbles from my mouth.”

A “Can’t I just take the beating instead? Please?”

F “I’ll do that if you really want.”

Ro “Do you want to borrow my slipper?”

A “I’d prefer the shovel. Aim right here, and do {i}not{/i} resuscitate me after.”

“Fang’s chuckle helps to lighten my mood immensely.”

“Maybe…”

“I continue replanting flowers under Rosa’s caring yet orwellian supervision.”

“At noon the bellowing of our principal calls us back up to the front of the
school.”
Sp “Thank you all again for showing up today.”

Sp “I hope that through your hard work all of you learned a valuable lesson.”

“I catch Fang rolling her eyes from the corner of my vision.”

Sp “Please do stay safe on your way home, and try to keep out of trouble in the
future.”

Sp “Dismissed.”

Ro “Not you, An-on! You stay!”

Ro “Right! And before everyone goes…!”

“Stella approaches holding a covered pot and paper plates.”

Ro “I made lunch for everyone!!”

“The small crowd gets a bit more energetic.”

Ro “Home cooked Mole Poblano! Enough for seconds and thirds!”

“I graciously accept a plate and stack it high with salty-sweet goodness.”

“The hot food is absolutely heavenly, reinvigorating me as I bite into the mexican
meal.”

F “mmmm… so filling…”

A “Yeah… Wish I could cook like that…”

“Wait.”

“I look around and see that the only ones left are Rosa, Stella, Fang and I.”

“Even Spears has gone home.”

A “Fang, ab-”
Ro “Alright An-on, back to work! You still owe me two hours of heavy lifting!”

Ro “Oh do not look so sad. You are a natural greenthumb!”

Ro “When you are not laying on my flowers, that is.”

“I don’t really… Get compliments.”

“It’s just circumstance, it’s not like I'm actually any less lazy or unskilled.”

F “Hold on, I’m not done yet.”

St “We can wait a bit while you two finish. You need all your energy after all.”

“These guys aren’t half bad.”

“I thought they were slave drivers, but then again I did ruin their hard work.”

A “Stella, I’ve been meaning to ask…”

A “Why {i}are{/i} you like this?”

St “Like what?”

A “You know, the whole thing with astrology and quoting…”

A “...”

A “...video games.”

St “Oh, I dunno, I guess it’s just the stuff I like.”

A “Right…”

St “Why do you ask? Ooh, are you interested in it, too?!”

A “I, err… maybe some other time, Stella.”

“The rest of lunch passes by without incident, and I’m left savoring Rosa’s
delicious cooking.”
“Like they say, the first rule of Mexican food: the more it looks like raw sewage,
the better it tastes.”

“The next two hours of work fly by relatively quickly without Rosa and Stella
breathing down my neck.”

“Replant the rest of the flowers I had crushed, all done by me.”

“Collect all of the discarded vines and clippings into compost bins, all done by
me.”

“Carry all of the tools back into the maintenance shed.”

“Take a guess who did it.”

-- “All me, Barry!”

“Fang stuck around for some reason, even though I don’t think she had any other
work to do.”

“But now my prison sentence is finally over and I’m free to go.”

“My feet hurt, my arms hurt, my back hurts.”

Ro “Anon, you did such a good job today! You should sign up for the gardening
club!”

St “Yeah! You could come and help out with {i}all{/i} of our meetings!”

“I just want to go home.”

A “That’s… I’ll just… think about it.”

“I walk away before either of them can push joining their club further. I’m too
tired to argue.”

“Fang seems to have disappeared, guess she didn’t want to stick around longer than
she had to.”

“As I pass by some of the gardens I take a moment to admire my handiwork.”

“As much as I didn’t want to be here, I have to admit they look a lot cleaner than
before.”

F “See? That’s what doing some actual hard work for once can do.”

“Fang’s sudden appearance from behind me makes me flinch. I guess she stuck around
after all.”
F “A wimp like you could use it, too.”

“So now Fang is suddenly talking to me, again?”

A “Yeah, sure…”

F “Now all the important and beautiful plants can thrive without any of the useless
weeds choking them up and holding them back.”

“Oh right, I almost forgot Fang thinks people like me are barely worth the oxygen.”

“Not that I really blame her after earlier.”

A “Yeah, well, don’t let the weeds like me get in your way…”

“I sigh and turn away from Fang, beginning my very achy walk home.”

“Time to go and sleep for twenty hours.”

F “Anon, wait.”

“I stop in my tracks. Now what does she want?”

A “Look, I said I was sorry, okay? I laughed at you guys and ruined your concert.”

A “I don’t care if you never want to talk to me again, I just don’t know what else
you want me to say.”

F “Anon... It…”

F “It’s not the concert I’m upset about.”

“What?”

A “It’s not?”

F “I mean, maybe a little bit, but...”

F “I’m mad because you kept it from me, okay?”

F “It’s just… I haven’t made many friends in, well… a while.”

F “I don’t want to lose an actual friend over stupid bullshit like that.”

F “I just thought you would have trusted me more to tell me the truth…”

A “I… is this why you stuck around earlier?”


“She hesitates before nodding, like she needed to convince herself.”

F “Not that it matters but… I’m sorry too.”

A “You… for what? Kicking me in the face?”

F “I {i}might{/i} have overreacted a bit earlier but you did deserve that.”

F “I’m sorry for calling you one of the weeds. You’re not a weed, you’re… I dunno,
a mushroom or some shit.”

A “A mushroom? Not like a cool tree or a cactus or something?”

F “Hell no, you’re not {i}that{/i} cool. Mushrooms take all the bad shit and turn
it into nutrients for all of the good plants, y’know?”

F “Plus you kinda look like one, too.”

“Fucking rude.”

A “That’s like the nicest thing I think I’ve ever heard you say.”

F “Now you’re pushing it.”

“I let out a sigh of relief. Can’t say that’s how I expected this conversation to
go.”

A “I guess we’re both assholes, then…”

F “Heh, yeah… friends?”

A “Friends.”

A “So, uh… why do you know so much about mushrooms, exactly? Reed?”

“Fang gives me a sideways glance and smiles a bit.”

F “Spend enough time around Stella and Rosa and you pick up a few gardening facts.”

A “Yeah, first impressions aside they’re pretty alright I guess. Stella’s a bit
weird and Rosa is a walking stereotype.”

F “BWAHAHA!! A dork like {i}you{/i} calling Stella weird?”

A “A dork like me has every right to call out Stella.”


F “Sure, sure. Anyway, I’ll be seeing ya, Anon.”

A “Yeah… See you…”

“Fang strolls away, humming some tune I’ve never heard.”

“Left alone now with just my thoughts I find myself feeling a great weight lift
from me.”

“Friends, huh… I can’t recall the last time I had a legitimate friend…”

A “{i}Some people certainly aren’t.{/i}”

A “{i}Just never meant to amount to anything or do anything important.{/i}”

A “...”

A “I just don’t know anymore.”

“I set off for my apartment, body sore but spirit soaring.”

-- “Wait what’s that giant flaming rock in the sk-”

“...”
6. Heart to Heart

“--February 201M2020 AR--”

“One month now. Five to go and I’ve found myself in a predicament.”

“I’m enjoying my time with Fang.”

“Most of the time just talking about stupid shit.”

“Like our mutual love for wire-fu and comedy movies.”

F/A “We are both ventriloquist, ventriloquist, ventriloquist. We are both


ventriloquists and we practice every day.”

F “He carries a basket”


A “He carries a paper roll”

F/A “and we don’t have cysts. But there is one thing that’s for sure friends, we
are ventriloquists.”

“Almost every day now I’m either at her desk helping her in Science or working on a
lab with her.”

“Or she’s sat next to me decrypting the mystical arts of Not Sucking at Music.”

“I’m talking more with her than anyone I’ve ever talked with.”

“Not to mention lunch and after school. It’s less hiding from the tangerine tyrant
and Naser these days and more spending time with Fang. Also Reed’s a bro.”

“Even if he’s constantly checked out.”

“And smells of burnt skunk.”

“The fuck is he on, anyway?!”

Re “It’s carfe, bro…”

“...what?”

Re “Carfentanyl.”

“...”

“Whatever.”

“Fang and the gang are pretty alright.”

“Trish though…”

“Every day she gives me the same look of distrust and a put-upon sigh.”

“As if I’m some kind of chore to deal with.”


“Whatever. S’not like she matters in the long run.”

“But I find myself having these weird thoughts lately.”

“Like, is any of this real or not?”

“I tumble backwards.”

“Off of the stage.”

“Whoa!”

A “ow…”

Re “bro….. That sucks…..”

“It’s lunch time now, and I guess I dozed off.”

“Too many late night ‘study’ sessions.”

Re “You like… need help?”

A “ffff…. Just fix the projector Reed.”

Re “‘Kay… Almost done…”

“I hobble to my feet, feeling out the bruise blossoming on my shoulder.”

A “Hrrrrg… Stupid fuckin’ stage.”

“I consider jumping back up, but find the stairs up more appealing.”

“Going up the stairs, Trish suddenly grabs my shoulder, pinning it to the wall.”

“She leans in close, looking me dead in the eyes.”

A “Uhh…”

A “Can I help you?”


T “Don’t play dumb.”

T “Something’s up with Fang today.”

“She gestures to where Fang is sitting.”

“Fang’s picking at her lunch with a fork, not eating a bite.”

“Now that I think about it, she has been a bit distant today.”

T “They’ve been like this since band practice yesterday.”

“Wait, what?”

T “Did you do something to them?”

“Do something? What does she mean?”

“Does she think that Fang and I…”

T “OI!”

A “What? No! I don’t think at least.”

A “Why are you so concerned?”

A “Everyone has a bad day every now and then, right?”

T “Fang and I have been friends for ten years now.”

T “Not once have I seen them this upset.”

T “You’re the only new thing around here.”

T “It can’t be anyone else.

T “So. What did you do?”

A “I swear I haven’t done anything with Fang.”


A “Look, we’ve got music next. I’ll ask Fang what’s up then.”

“Trish glowers. We both glance at Fang to see her still sitting there with her
untouched food.”

T “You’ll talk to Fang? You’ll probably make it worse. I should be the one to talk
with them.”

A “So why haven’t you?”

“Trish’s mouth shuts with a click.”

“I stare her down.”

“Her eyes harden and she finally speaks.”

T “...Fine… but you better not fuck up.”

“She lets go of my shoulder, stuffing her hands in her jacket pockets with a huff.”

“I finally return to where I was sitting on the stage to continue finishing my


lunch.”

“Right when I plant myself on the ground Reed speaks up.”

Re “Aaaaand… Done!”

A “Done? With the projector?”

Re “That’s right, man… Now we can watch movies… Shows… Pornos… All that.”

T “We’re not watching porn in school.”

A “Not with that attitude…”

“Trish throws an orange slice at me.”

Re “So what do you guys wanna watch…?”


“I can’t think of anything that would be appropriate around normal highschoolers.”

“Trish raises her hand and jumps in place.”

T “How about the Count of Monte Cristo?”

Re “Oh, I know that one! The actors in that one are pretty great…”

A “Oh yeah. I love the VA work.”

“Trish and Reed stop and stare at me.”

T “...”

Re “...”

“Crap, was it something I said?”

T “What-”

“*DING-DONG BING-BONG*”

“Saved by the bell!”

“I look to Fang and-”

“Oh.”

“When did she leave?”

A “Oh, Fang left already. I’ll go catch up with her.”

A “BYE!”

“I make record time out of the auditorium, leaving a still confused Trish and
Reed.”

“...”

“Fang isn’t in music class when I get there.”


“I tap out a quick message to her on my phone.”

“I take a spot next to her seat and wait.”

“Maybe she just needed to use the bathroom.”

“...”

“It’s been about twenty minutes.”

“I’m starting to get worried.”

T “Something’s up with Fang today.”

“Hmmm...”

“I looked at my phone, and the message I sent her way just before class started.”

“A: Hey. Wanna talk?”

“Still unseen?”

“...”

T “you better not fuck up.”

“God damn it.”

A “Mr. Jingo! I need to use the bathroom!”

“...”

“One guitar-shaped bathroom pass later I’m scrambling through the halls.”

“If I were a non-binary teenage pterdactyl having a crisis, where would I hide?”

“Someplace only Fang would go...”

“The family bathrooms!”


“There are only two in the building.”

“I sprint to the first bathroom, closer to the back of the school and nestled away
in the special needs area.

“My knuckles rap against the door, locked and preoccupied.”

A “Fang? You’re missing class and I seriously need help with this sheet music.”

(???)St “The one you seek is elsewhere.”

“Who the fuck… Wait…”

A “You’re that weird stego chick…Stella?”

St “That’s very rude… And I’m not weird…”

A “Whatever, do you know where Fang is?”

St “...Not here… Can you please leave? I have a nervous bladder.”

“I turn away from the door and sprint to the front of the school where the other
bathroom is.”

“It’s while I’m moving briskly through the empty corridors of the school with un-
tuned guitar in hand that I find divine providence.”

“Or rather.”

“The feathers floating by the window provide me with the clue I need.”

“I look out the window, and while I can’t look up to see for sure, the shadow that
she is casting on the ground below is enough verification required.”

“My feet climb the steps easily, but my mind is ill at-ease.”

“The hell is wrong with me right now.”

“Why do I feel anxious right now?”


T “What did you do?”

“What if I did do something?”

T “Fang and I have been friends for ten years now.”

“I’ve known her for barely a month. And why is it my problem to fix?”

T “Not once have I seen them this upset.”

“I can’t stop the gnawing feeling in my chest.”

“I’m at the door to the roof now. It’s shut, but by the handle I notice a piece of
cardboard tucked between the door and frame, keeping the latch open.”

F “Good job, dork.”

“Fang smirks a bit.”

“Damn it all. Fang’s problems first, then I can figure out my chest.”

“I open the door and am immediately blinded by the sun.”

“I shade my eyes.”

“The door clicks shut behind me.”

A “Oh… shit…”

F “Whose the- Anon?... What’s with the guitar?”

“Fang is sitting atop the stair enclosure looking down at me.”

A “Mr. Jingo’s hall pass. I uh… Kinda need help with sheet music again.”

F “Wow. You really suck at music.”

A “Yeah. I really do.”


“I find the ladder easily enough and climb on top of the tiny hut.”

“Around Fang are scattered feathers.”

A “You alright? The feath-”

F “Preening.”

“What.”

“Fang sighs. She holds one of her wings and gently brushes her fingers through the
feathers.”

F “I’m preening my wing.”

“She winces. A feather drifts to the floor.”

A “That looks painful.”

“I move closer.”

F “A little.”

“I sit down next to her and look out at Volcaldera Bluff. It’s a beautiful view.”

“It’s a distraction.”

F “You ever…”

>>> All choices will cut to the same section and cut off the rest of Fang’s
monologue.
>stay silent
>Interrupt
>>see choice 4b

>Stay silent

“There’s a time to speak and a time to listen.”

F “... You ever feel like you just don’t matter?”


“Fang stares at the vista of Volcaldera but her eyes are vacant.”

F “I feel like no matter what I do, I’ll never be able to make something.”

F “I try and try but nobody likes the ways I express myself.”

“She growls.”

F “Not once after all the work I’ve put into VVURM DRAMA has anyone ever told me it
was good,”

“Her eyes wetten. Her voice roughens. Her shoulders quake.”

F “nobodies ever said ‘Good job, Fang! Can I get a copy of that last song on CD’ .”

F “I’ve been playing music since I was basically in diapers and all I have to show
for it is a shit reputation.”

“Her hand curls into a fist. Her nails bite into her palm, and I can clearly see
the minute trickle of blood.”

F “How much harder do I have to try to get people to notice me!”

“Her fist crashes down on the floor.”

F “Even my own parents!”

F “When dad looks at me it’s like he just sees a lost cause!”

F “ “Oh, Fang is the scene teen, better focus on the one that ISN’T broken so we
don’t screw up again!” “

“She punctuated her shouts with her fist, striking the roof beneath her.”

“Her fist lands softly one final time, uncurling to reveal the bleeding grooves her
sharp nails have left.”

F “...”

“Watching her break apart, it’s causing the dull pain in my chest to intensify.”
F “Why can’t I be popular like him?”

“Fang deflates completely. All her anger gone, replaced with melancholy.”

F “Naser doesn’t have to try at all!”

F “Even crippled, he just breezes through life!”

F “Why does he get straight A’s?”

F “Why does he get my parents’ attention?”

F “Why do I have to be the burden on everyone?!”

“She grabs her knees and buries her face in her lap.”

A “...”

>stay silent
>Interrupt
>>see choice 4c
>>Stay silent

F “And the worst part is he can’t even hate me.”

“She picks her head up.”

“Rivulets of tears and orange eyeliner run down her cheeks and leave bright stains
on her knees.”

F “I can tell him to fuck off every day and he’ll still be there the next.

F “As if nothing fucking happened.”

F “He’s a constant reminder of everything I can’t be.”

F “He’s a goddamned boy scout!”

F “Lil’ Mr. Perfect!”

F “And I’ll always be in his fucking shadow!”


F “I can’t just change, just magically get better at everything even if someone
like Naser tries to help.”

F “And it’s clear he wants to.”

F “But the sheer difference between us…”

F “It won’t ever happen.”

F “But my brother tries.”

F “He’s always trying. He just FUCKS UP!”

F “Every. Fucking. Time.”

“She wipes a tear with one of her hands, but leaves a bloody smudge instead.”

F “Naser knows who he is.”

F “I don’t even know what I am.”

A “...”

“Do I step in now…?”

>stay silent
>Interrupt
>>see choice 4d

>>Stay silent

F “WHO AM I, DAMN IT?!”

F “I can only define myself by the thing’s I’m not.”

F “I’m not a good band player.”

F “I’m not a good sibling.”


F “I’m not a good friend.”

F “I’m not a good person.”

F “My mind is a fucking mess. In my head it’s all…”

F “My thoughts… they’re all fucking foggy. Half the time I’m hating myself.”

F “‘Am I who I say I am?’ Maybe? Not really…”

F ”The other half I’m daydreaming of being something special.”

F “That I’m different from everyone. Above them… I know more than them.”

F “They’re both lies. I’m fuckin’ lying to myself but…”

F “It’s like I’m just here to be a drain on myself and others.”

F “I’m stuck with myself, I can’t just drop everything and try other things now.”

F “It’s just too late for that.”

F “There’s too many ways to fuck up.”

F “Music is the only thing I’ve ever been decent at, and even then…”

“She looks to me desperately, at a loss for words.”

“...”

>stay silent
>Interrupt
>see choice 4e

>>Stay silent

A “...”

F “...”
F “Why won’t you say anything?”

F “Here I am begging for help and you haven’t said a word!”

F “You’re always so sure of yourself, yet here you are listening to me in a crisis
and you can’t say anything?!”

“Fang grips my jacket with both hands, digging in.”

F “What is it you have that I don’t?!”

F “What is it you want from me?!”

F “What is it I want from you?!”

F “When you got here a few weeks ago you were just some nobody kid without friends
who lives alone on financial assistance!”

“She’s shaking my arm around.”

F “And now everyone I know is friends with you!”

F “You have no talents, no specific knowledge anywhere, no real personality…”

F “WHAT IS IT WITH YOU THAT YOU CAN LACK AN IDENTITY BUT KNOW EXACTLY WHO YOU
ARE?!”

“Honestly I…”

A “dunno”

F “...What…”

A “I dunno how to say it. All I know is I’m me…”

F “You’re… You?”

“I struggle to find the right words.”

“Fang stares pleadingly. Eventually she buries her eyes in my jacket arm.”
A "It's like.. I don’t know...”

A “You’re trying to be something you’re not.”

A “It needs to happen naturally.”

“Fang looks up from my arm.”

F “Naturally…?”

A “If you are forcing this… whatever... then it's like some misplaced idea or like,
a refusal to leave the comfort zone...”

A “Argh, what I’m trying to say is…”

A “I ended up trying to be someone else too.”

A “To the point that I rejected who I really was and started to fuck myself up.”

A “I’m not about making others' notice me, or about being great at something.”

A “I just do what makes me, well, me.”

A “I'm the only me here, and I think it's safe to assume that there's several of
you. Like, you don’t know, you said it yourself.”

“Her fingers tighten around my arm.”

“I’m not certain she’s breathing right now.”

A “And there’s tons of different people going through what you are right now,
trying to force their egos, only to reject who they really are.”

A “Not to undermine your feelings or anything.”

A “And at the end of it all, I’ve accepted that ‘I’ am, and will always be, ‘me’.”

-- A “Because I am whatever I say I am, and if I wasn’t then why would I say I am?”

A “Ya see?”
F “I have to… Figure it out myself…?”

“Fang’s grip loosens.”

“She puts her hands around her knees and lowers her head.”

“Her expression is one of complete resignation.”

F “I don’t… I can’t do anything on my own.”

F “How am I supposed to do something like this?”

A “You aren’t alone.”

A “I’m here. Reed and Trish are here. You already know Naser wants to help.”

F “...”

A “It doesn’t need to be all at once.”

“Fang looks back to me and gives a sad smile.”

F “... Alright…”

“She tries to dry her tears again, only to smudge her face with blood and makeup
again.”

“I remove my jacket and offer the sleeve to her.”

“She sniffles, then grabs it to wipe her eyes.”

“...It’s laundry day anyways.”

“After returning my jacket, Fang looks to me again with a somber smile.”

A “Why did you come up here?”

F “It’s nice up here. Quiet.”


A “But why? And why alone?”

F “To think. Maybe to throw myself a pity party. I do this every year.”

A “Up here?”

F “Nah… Just somewhere I can be alone.”

A “Every year though?”

F “... Since I was eleven…”

A “Jeez. What happened?”

F “I broke Naser’s wing.”

“Ah. My foot tastes extra salty today.”

F “We used to be really close. He looked up to me.”

F “I’m his big sister after all. I would look out for him.”

F “Then… seven years ago…”

F “He had asked me if we could really fly.”

“Fang stretched her wings to highlight the action.”

F “I said ‘of course’... I looked away for a second and then it happened…”

F “He jumped off the bluff.”

“Her eyes become distant, and I can only guess just how vividly she’s reliving this
moment of her past.”

F “I watched as he jumped. As he bounced off the cliff and into the water.”

F “I climbed down as fast as I could, hoping to God he wasn’t dead.”

F “But the current… Dad and the lifeguard had to go in because the current was too
strong.”

“Her voice quakes as she’s engulfed in her memory.”

F “When mom came with the medic-”

“Fang chokes back a sob and continues.”

F “Naser was… I thought he was dead…”

F “...Covered in blood…”

F “...Limbs mangled…”

“Fang’s eyes grow wet again. Without a second thought I draw her into a hug,
comforting her.”

“Her voice is muffled by my jacket but she continues.”

F “I’m why his wing is a fucking mess. I did it…”

F “So why…”

F “Why doesn’t he hate me…”

Nas “They’re still family.”

A “Because you’re his sister.”

“Fang flinches in my arms, but doesn’t pull away.”

A “You’re the one that’s hurting, Fang. Not Naser.”

“I surprised myself there. I honestly don’t know how I managed this conversation.”

“I let go of Fang and lean back, giving her some space. Her breathing is evening
out, and she looks far more composed now.”

F “... I’m sorry for what I said earlier.”


A “Huh?”

F “About how you’re a nobody.”

A “You’re pretty much right.”

F “Maybe, but I shouldn’t have put it so harshly.”

F “All this time I thought people like you were…”

F “Useless? Something like that.”

F “But here you are, proving me wrong time and time again.”

A “I get what you mean.”

A “I could say the same to you as well.”

A “I’ve been breaking your rules like you’ve been breaking mine.”

F “Maybe we’re both just useless nobodies.”

“She chuckles to herself.”

>>choice 4b

“She seems at a loss for words.”

“I should say something.”

A “You’re feeling helpless, right?”

A “Like you don’t matter?”

“Fang looks at me with desperation.”

F “Y...Yes…”

A “Here’s what I think…”


>>move to bad choice convergence

>>choice 4c

“Here’s a good place to butt in.”

A “You aren’t a burden to me.”

“Fang removes her head from her knees and looks to me with pleading eyes.”

F “What?”

A “I’m your friend too, right?”

A “I don’t think you’re a burden.”

“Fang sniffles a bit.”

A “Here’s what I think…”

>>move to bad choice convergence

>>choice 4d

“Now’s a good time.”

A “You’re Fang.”

“She looks to me with tears streaming down her cheek.”

A “Even if you don’t see it, you’re still you.”

A “The Fang I know likes music, bad movies, and doesn’t take crap from any adults.”

A “Am I right?”

“Fang nods slowly.”

A “Here’s what I think…”


>>move to bad choice convergence

>>choice 4e

“Here we go.”

A “It’s never too late to try something new.”

F “...I can’t.”

F “I just can’t.”

A “You have support from me and Naser, right?”

F “...”

F “...Maybe...”

A “Here’s what I think…”

>>move to bad choice convergence

>>bad choice converge

“I put my arm on Fang’s shoulder.”

A “You’re in a pretty bad spot right now.”

A “Self-improvement is hard, but there’s nothing to be gained without sacrifice,


right?”

“Fang gives a slight nod.”

A “You need to step out from your comfort zone more often, even if you think
there’s no time.”

A “There’s no harm in diversifying, right?”

“Fang looks away from the coastline and to me.”


F “... I don’t know. Maybe you’re right...”

A “You could also try harder to get along with Naser.”

A “I guarantee there’s not that much in the way between you two.”

F “...You’ll be there to support me, right?”

A “Sure.”

F “I don’t know if I’m strong enough to do all that…”

A “I believe you can be.”

A “Being weak is nothing to be ashamed of.”

A “Staying weak is.”

A “You don’t have to do it alone.”

“Fang embraces me tight.”

F “Thank you.”

“We sit in silence for a few minutes.”

“..”

“...”

“....”

“Eventually, she lets go.”

“Fang’s breathing is evening out, and she looks far more composed now.”

>>>Convergence point
F “Hey, can I see that?”
“Fang points at my oversized hall pass.”

A “Yeah, sure”

“She takes it from my hands, our fingers brushing for a second.”

“She blushes while she handles the acoustic bathroom pass.”

F “I think… I think I finally got the tune, Anon.”

A “Tune?”

“She finishes tuning the guitar and tests it. With a nod to herself Fang begins
strumming.”

“The rhythm is slow and the tone is soft, enough so that her humming blends
perfectly with it.”

“I lean back, bobbing my head along to the impromptu music.”

“The streaks from her tears that had once marred her pretty face only help the
highlight her soft smile now.”

“I hum along now too, which causes Fang to giggle. The rhythm is slowing to a
crawl, the song about to end.”

F “With a meteor coming soon


Everyone’s going to die
So I’ll say to everyone
Goodbye Volcano High”

“The lyrics surprise me, but I shrug it off.”

A “You ready to get up?”

“Fang nods and wipes her tears one last time with her forearm.”

“I stand and pop my back, looking out over the fence at the ground below.”

“From here I can see the afternoon sun starting to encroach on the skyline of the
small coastal town.”
“Turning to Fang, I crouch a bit and extend my hand to her.”

“She moves her bloody hand to take it, but hesitates.”

“...”

“...”

“She softly grasps my hand.”

“She winces in pain.”

“You know…”

“It’s strange, I expected the alarms to go off again, but…”

“This feels different, somehow.”

“More natural.”

“I’m careful to hoist her to her feet. Mindful of her injured palm. But her beak
accidentally bumps into my cheek on her way up.”

“Ah, there they are.”

“Fang’s eyes contract and she instinctively hops backwards, covering her muzzle
with her hands and turning her head away in her flusteration.”

“I clench my lower jaw and look at my palm, slick with sweat and her blood.”

“The silence continues for an immeasurable amount of time.”

A “Haha… So that’s how dinos kiss… Haha…”

[Internal screaming sfx here]

“FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFU-”

F “Haha… not really haha… haha…”


A “Ha ha… haaaa… uh…”

“I look for something, anything, to end this awkwardness.”

“Like the guitar hall pass. Wait…”

“I check my phone, seeing that Mr. Jingo’s class will be ending in 10 minutes.”

A “Fuck… the assignment…”

“Fang finally looks my way again, though her face is still flush.”

F “What?”

A “Mr. Jingo’s assignment. There’s no way in hell I’ll be able to do it at home.”

F “Pfffft.”

“Fang’s hands try to cover her beak, failing horribly to contain her giggles.”

F “Hehehehehehe. God, you really suck at music.”

“I glare at her.”

F “haaaaah... Why don’t you just drop it? It’s an elective anyway.”

“Because I need to maintain my GPA for college.”

A “Because… I kinda like it…”

“I blush and look down to the entrance of the roof below us.”

F “Hmm… maaaaybe I’ll help you…”

“Fang hops down, her wings easing her landing.”

F “I owe you for the fuckin’ therapy session anyway.”

A “Oh thank fuck.”


“I climb down the ladder. Those wings must be really convenient.”

Sp “WHO THE FUCK IS UP HERE!”

“The door flies open, off its hinges, through the suicide fence and over the side
of the building, crashing loudly on the concrete below.”

Sp “I KNOW SOMEONE IS DITCHING UP HERE! MY HUNTING INSTINCTS CAN TELL!”

“Oh double fuck.”

A “Uh…”

Sp “YOU!”

“Principal Spears looks at us, finger pointed at me as if to fire a special beam


cannon through my chest.”

Sp “In all my god damned years… On top of the roof! Explain. NOW!”

“Bullshit mode activate.”

A “I got lost looking for the bathroom?”

“Spears incinerates me on the spot.”

F “Estrus season?”

“For a brief instant I picture Fang in a bikini.”

“Hot.”

“Fang gets a similar stare and withers down.”

Sp “I’m not stupid. Ptero estrus season isn’t for another few months.”

Sp “Empty your pockets. Now.”


“I reduce myself to hoover flags. All I had on me was my phone and a ratty wallet
held together with hot glue and duct tape.”

“Fang does the same, dropping her own phone, a spare guitar pick, and an unopened
pack of cigarettes.”

“Spears looks at Fang dead in the eyes, rips the package open, and stuffs every
cigarette in his mouth at once.”

“To our mortified stares, he chews them until they are a brown glob and spits it
over the fence, landing on a rather oriental looking car.”

Sp “Anon. Go to class. Now. Fang. To the Nurse’s.”

“I look to Fang one last time. She looks a mess.”

“Her wings are ragged, feathers misaligned and a clear patch of them missing on
one.”

“Stains on her legs from her make-up, tears and blood.”

“Drying blood on her hands, arms and beak.”

“Eyes puffy and red from crying.”

“But her smile… was…”

“I wave her goodbye and wordlessly return to class.”

“I only have a few minutes, but I can’t focus on the assignment. I’ll have to take
it home as homework.”

F “Hmm… maaaaybe I’ll help you…”

“I take out my phone and consider messaging Fang again.”

“!”

“My heart thumps roughly in my chest. Just what is with me today.”

“All this drama… When did my life become a soap opera…”


“Heh… even included a dramatic kiss…”

“I look at my hand, her blood now dried and dusty on my palm.”

“Did… That count as a kiss?”

“I mean, it was unintentional. She backed off and all.”

“...”

“Jeez, my insides feel like liquid.”

“Surely that’s just my disgusted reaction to Spear’s scare tactic up there.”

“Nah, this isn’t fear. Unlike a bottomless pit the feeling is...”

“Pleasant…”

“Yeah, I kinda like it. Hmmmm…”

“I wonder if Fang-”

“!”

“The feeling intensifies. But why? I only thought of-”

“It’s not as if she-”

“But-”

“...”

“Do I like Fang?”

“!!!!!!”

“...”

“Fuck.”
“...”

7. Not a Date
“-One Month Later-”

“I’m laying in bed on a saturday morning.”

“It’s been raining the last few days, so I’m stuck inside.”

“Not like I had any other plans anyways.”

“The forecast says it should clear up later today.”

“There’s no new games out, and my backlog is just the perfect size of fuck that
noise.”

“I don’t even feel like baiting on a certain basket weaving polynesian forum.”

“The light of my phone is the only thing illuminating my hovel of a home.”

“I scroll through the camera roll out of boredom.”

“At least that’s what I tell myself.”

“Interspersed through various memes and screenshots of homework assignments are


pictures Fang has been sending.”

“Over the last month I’ve been included more in Fang’s circle of friends.”

“Never imagined I’d have so many actual pictures on it.”

“Each one brings a vivid memory to mind, usually an embarrassing one.”

“But there’s some other ones…”

“Like of me with the rest of the band just enjoying the atmosphere in the
auditorium.”

“My perusal through old pictures is interrupted with a text.”


“Fang: Looking for new band venue”

“Fang: Don’t feel like going alone”

“Fang: Do you want to come with?”

“...Alone…?”

“No, shut the fuck up alarms.”

“Anon: Why alone?”

“Fang: Trish has a horn appt and Reed is”

“A pause.”

“Fang: Preoccupied.”

#cut to Reed in bathroom cg

Re “...dude like… back to the story...”

#cut back to Anon

“Anon: Alright, where we dropping?”

“Fang: Just show up at my place in like an hour”

“Fang: Need to go now”

“Anon: k”

“This is fine.”

“It’s just helping a friend of mine find someplace for her band to play.”

“A friend I have feelings for.”

“And we’re alone.”


“JUST HANGING OUT CALM DOWN ANON CALM THE FUCK DOWN.”

“I boot up my computer and start a gacha thread on a taiwanese rum brewing


blogsite.”

“The soothing replies bring my heartbeat down to an acceptable level.”

“To top it off I insult the mods and then report my own post so I know they have to
see it.”

“I am become Anon, Collector of (You)s and Poster of Shit.”

“By now the rain has subsided.”

“Still feeling refreshed, I grab my jacket and start making my way across town to
Fang’s house.”

“...”

“Passing through the snobby part of town to catch a bus, my thoughts begin
intruding on me.”

“Images of what’s to come pass before my eyes unwarranted.”

“Looking for restaurants… because they’d be good venues of course!”

“Walking through the mall maybe? That’d be a good spot.”

“The day turns to night and the temperature drops.”

“I offer Fang my coat and-”

“God damn it no this isn’t a daaa-”

“Oh shit my stop!”

“I scurry off the bus right as the doors are closing.”

“And I don’t forget to thank the driver.”


“The bus stop is luckily only a block away from Fang’s neighborhood.”

“There’s a few stores open, and a street vendor is gleefully setting up shop for
the first time in a few days..”

“She calls out to me as I pass.”

Street Vendor “Some storm, eh?”

A “Oh, uh… Yeah. It was.”

Street Vendor “People don’t usually take the bus here these days, where ya headed?”

A “Just… Over to the suburbs over there.”

Street Vendor “Highschooler, taking the bus to the suburbs on a saturday…”

Street Vendor “You’re going to see a girl, ain’tcha?”

A “How did…”

A “I mean, I am, but… I-it isn’t like that, you know?”

Street Vendor “Come onnnn, you can’t fool me.”

Street Vendor “At any rate, why not pick up a few ‘dogs to impress her?”

Street Vendor “We got ice cream too, if she’s an herbie.”

A “Maybe later. I’ll keep it in mind.”

“I turn to leave, behind me I hear the vendor mutter to herself.”

Street Vendor “Ah, my highschool days...”

“... I pick up the pace.”

“...”
“The difference between Fang’s neighborhood and my apartment complex is night and
day.”

“The smell of burnt tires doesn’t hang in the air. Instead it’s a mix of Cedar and
wet pavement.”

“The knife in my pocket feels excessive as an officer’s car passes by.”

“I suppose to someone who's lived here it would seem normal, but to someone from
bumfuck nowhere? The suburb felt decadent.”

“Fang’s home is easy enough to find thanks to Gruugle maps’ images.”

“It’s nice. Very nice actually. Two stories tall and with an expensive, if kinda
scraped up, sports car in the drive-way.”

“I approach the home, careful to hop up the spread stones that make up the walkway,
in fear of trampling the well manicured yard.”

“At last I’m at my destination. Fuck.”

“I stand frozen on the white porch now with the front door before me like the
ramparts of a castle.”

“Am I supposed to knock, or text her that I’m here?”

“Crap, I’ve never done anything like this before.”

“Go with a friend to find a venue for a band, that is.”

>>Knock.
>>Text Fang.

>>Knock.

“Before my knuckles reach the door it swings open.”

>>Text Fang.

“Before I can hit ‘Send’ the door swings open.”

“What is this killing intent?!”


FangDad “Hm… You Anon?”

“Shitshitshitalarms shut the fuck up right now please I need to think.”

A “Y-yeah, I’m Anon. P-pleased to m-meet you uh…”

FangDad “Executioner.”

“My pants feel heavy and sodden.”

FangMom “Honey, who is it?”

FangMom “OH! You must be Anon!”

FangMom “Come in come in!”

“The petite ptero-matriarch drags me into her abode. I could see the patriarch’s
jaw clench as Fang’s mother pushed me into the comfiest couch to ever exist.”

FangMom “Oh you must forgive my little Lucy, she’s still getting ready for your
date!”

“Oh god I can feel iron-sights on my back.”

“While she spoke a mile a minute I managed to catch some of the words. I ignored
the latter, because this ISN’T a daaaa-”

“Isn’t THAT!”

“But-”

A “Ah, it’s uh, no trouble ma’am.”

A “But uh… I thought her name was Fang.”

“She titters, holding a hand over her sly smile.”

FangMom “Oh that? My little tooth fairy always loves to reinvent herself.”
“Her eyes gloss over as she’s pulled into her own memories.”

FangMom “One moment she was the prettiest princess pirate, and now she’s some sort
of rock and roll maestro! The imagination she has…”

Nas “Sup buddy.”

“I look across the coffee table to see Naser reclined in an equally plushy couch.”

Nas “You good?”

“I breathe deeply, collecting my scrambled thoughts into a semi-coherent state.”

A “I’m good… So uh… nice place.”

“I look at the walls of the room, what little white I could see that wasn’t covered
by the myriad of family photos.”

“Huh… She really was a princess pirate at some point…”

N “Home is where the heart is, as they say.”

“SWEET RAPTOR JESUS ON HIS CROSS OF ROCK!”

“Oh… is that a sin to think that with that cross hung behind Naser’s head?”

“I look back to see the Cream Queen of the Kremlin, a tray of the smallest cups
I’ve ever seen in her arms.”

N “Naser! Your mother made us some tea! Oh isn’t she the most wonderful woman!”

Nas “Bleh… She knows I’m not a fan of that hot leaf juice…”

“Naomi navigates around the couch and coffee table, setting the tray of treats and
tea before us.”

N “Would you like some, Anon?”

A “I’ll pass, thanks.”

“Something’s not right with what just happened.”


“I look back to where Naomi was standing.”

“The entire opposing wall is covered in various hunting trophies.”

“Two bears, a whole school of fish, a falcon, two deers…”

“And a rhinoceros.”

“... I may have made a huge mistake.”

“The loveseat to the right of me scrapes forward into my field of view.”

“Fang’s father leans back, carefully examining and polishing a golf club.”

“Maybe I can turn his trophies into a conversation piece.”

“Extend an olive branch, so to speak.”

A “What gun did you use to hunt these?”

FangDad: “Gun?”

“My hands fold into my lap and I stare a million yards into the wall clock ahead of
me.”

FangDad: “So… Anon, was it?”

FangDad: “You a big fan of Golf?”

“Naser dons a similar pose.”

A “I’ve played minigolf before…”

FangDad: “That’s a good start, a good start…”

FangDad: “Nothing beats the real thing, though.”

FangDad: "You ever play golf before, boy?"


“Don't say Wii Golf don't say Wii Golf don't say Wii golf”

A: "N-no, not on a proper green before."

“Nailed it.”

FangDad: "Well, this is my favorite club right here. A 9 Iron.”

“He finishes polishing the head of the club and rotates it ever so slightly so I
see my reflection in the metal.”

FangDad: "Now, Irons are by far the most common, and most useful out of your
standard club set. Anywhere you need an extra...push, the Iron will do."

“His gaze makes its way from the club to me as he lays it across his lap. I gulp
and sink back into the couch in an attempt to hide among the cushions.”

FangDad: "Of course, this is all due to the solid steel construction, and your own
efforts.”

FangDad: “With the right quality club and technique, you can almost feel the ball
cleaving in twain when you strike it…”

FangDad: “And I assure you, Anon, that my equipment is of the highest quality, and
my technique is impeccable."

“Fang’s father stands up, stepping on top of the sturdy coffee table. His club is
lined up, and I can see my reflection in the impromptu ball.”

“With well-practiced motions he demonstrates a perfect swing in the middle of a


living room. I can practically feel the air slice in half as an image of the
impossibly large pteradon stands over me with the club flashes momentarily.”

“Fang’s father laughs heartily, setting the murder tool aside as he reclaims his
throne.”

N “What fine form sir!”

FangMom “Dear!”

“Fang’s father flinches.”


FangMom “How many times have I told you about intimidating suitors! This is the
first boy our little Tooth Fairy has brought home!!”

FangDad “What about Reed?”

“The father shrunk under the patented mother’s leer.”

FangMom “You know that boy isn’t right, dear.”

“I feel a smidgen of sympathy, but keep quiet to avoid similar treatment from her.”

F “Oh my god Mom! Not in front of my friends!”

“Fang is at the foot of the stairway, frustration clear on her face.”

“I look to Fang with hands clasp together, silently pleading.”

N “Oh! Are you ready for your date now?”

“I lurch in my seat at that.”

A “Ah, nah nah! We’re just-””

F “N-no! We need to find a venue!”

FangMom “Just you two though?”

“Oh god no. Please, Raptor Jesus, I promise I’ll sacrifice a goat if you end this.”

N “Why don’t we have a double date then!”

“...God, why have you abandoned me…?”

“Buddha be a bro please!”

FangMom “I agree! Naser and Naomi can accompany you!”

“I am going to personally commit mass deicide.”

FangDad: “I agree.”
“He looks me dead in the eyes.”

FangDad “More people means you’re less likely to do something reckless, after all.”

Naser “I dunno, I don’t think Fang would appreciate-”

“Fang’s father puts his arm around Nasers’ shoulder and pulls him aside.”

FangMom “You’d love going with your brother, right Fang?”

F “Absolutely not.”

F “I’m perfectly able to find somewhere to play without anyone’s help.”

F “Especially his.”

FangMom “Come now, how many opportunities in your youth will you get to spend time
all together like this?”

F “Hopefully none.”

FangMom “Aww, but you used to always spend time with little Naser…”

“Her eyes gloss over again.”

FangMom “Like all those times you used to bathe together.”

Fang “Mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom!”

“Fang’s Father gives a loud pat on Naser’s back and he returns to the
conversation.”

Nas “Yes, I think a group date is an excellent idea.”

Nas “We should all go together.”

“Naser’s shaking like a leaf in a monsoon in the middle of an earthquake with a


meteor hanging overhead.”

F “It’s not happening.”


FangDad “It is.”

“Fang and her dad lock eyes.”

“The tension in the room mounts as the staredown draws on.”

“The moment long eternity finally ends though.”

“Eventually Fang flops her head back in defeat.”

F
“Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff
fffffffffffffffffffffffine.”

F “Let’s just get out of here, Anon.”

“Gladly.”

“Naomi gives a little cheer and tugs the still catatonic Naser by the arm out the
door.”

“I give a polite goodbye to Fang’s Mother.”

“I extend a hand to Fang’s father and-”

“The eight bones of my palm are squeezed together, being ground into dust under the
immense strength.”

“The five bones joining my fingers to my palm threaten to splinter from the
powerful grip.”

“The rest of my bones in my hand try to separate from the vicious shake that Fang’s
father ends it with.”

“By the time I get outside everyone else is getting into the fancy and beat up car
from before.”

“Guess it was Nasers’.”

N “Come on, Naser! The day is still young!”


“Naser, still mentally fried, is being goaded by Naomi into driving to the city.”

“Eventually, he robotically enters the drivers’ seat.”

“Naomi ecstatically shoots into the shotgun seat.”

“Fang and I take the back seats.”

“Now that we’re getting this shitshow on the road, I should probably clarify with
Fang about precisely what sort of venue she wants.”

“The split second I move my hand towards Fang to ask, Naser chucks his jacket
between us with lightning speed.”

Nas “Whups, look out back there! Haha!”

“The look of pants-shitting fear on his face betrays his jovial tone.”

“Poor guy.”

A “A-anyways, Fang.”

“She looks over.”

A “What sort of place are we supposed to be looking for?”

“Fang looks away for a minute with a finger under the end of her beak.”

“Is that supposed to be a thinking pose?”

F “Some wide open space where people can stand or sit.”

F “Preferably with a mosh pit.”

N “Oh, I know lots of places like that!”

A “Where?”

N “They’re at the Gold Fern Galleria in the downtown shopping district!”


F “No.”

N “Why ever not?”

F “I’m not going to play around the ritzy area.”

F “There’s more stuck up assholes there than at school!”

“Naomi shrugs and turns back to Naser.”

N “In that case, we should just park in the middle of the city and work our way
around.”

F “...Sure. That’s fine.”

N “What do you think, Anon?”

“I look at Fang. She’s preoccupied with watching the buildings fly past us.”

“I shrug.”

N “Alright then, to the city we go!”

“Naomi turns the radio on, shattering my ears with the most nauseatingly upbeat
love-song on max volume.”

“I’m left to retch as the song violates my virgin ears with it’s too cheery tune.”

“--30 Excruciating Minutes Later--”

“In the city proper now I find myself with a new dilemma.”

“Our group slowly makes its way down the sidewalk.”

“Naser walks ahead and continues to look back at me, his expression anxious and
worried.”

“Fang refuses to speak and gives everyone and everything a vicious sneer.”

“And Naomi just.”


“Won’t.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

N “OH OH OH HOW ABOUT HERE! IT’S SO SPACIOUS AND THE FOOD IS TO DIE FOR- OOOOH I
LOVE THAT RESTAURANT MAYBE WE CAN ASK THEM- OH AND THEN THERE’S THIS NICE CAFE AND
THEY EVEN HAVE A PIANO-”

“God this marmalade monster needs to die.”

N “OH. MY. GOSH! It’s PERFECT!”

“Naomi stops the group before a large glass window. Past it is a large open room
sparsely filled with miniscule round tables with candelabras set atop them.”

Nas “Isn’t this a bit too…”

“Ostentatious.”

F “Gaudy.”

N “No way! It’s wide open! The tables can be rearranged to provide ample room for
your audience!”

“Fang looks unimpressed.”

N “Come on, let’s go ask!”

“The saurolophus wraps her arms around Naser’s and bodily drags him to the
entrance.”

F “Fuck me…”

“Shutthefuckupbrain.”

A “Ten dollars we get kicked out.”

F “No deal. You’re stating an inevitability, not a possibility.”

“We follow behind the pair to find Naomi pestering the Maitre D’ for possible
arrangements, cringing as the poor man just stares off into the middle distance
while Naomi prattles on obliviously.”

N “-And if possible could you include maybe a dinner ticket option for-”

“The Maitre D’ looks towards us, or rather, Fang, and scowls.”

Maitre D “Our esteemed establishment caters exclusively to those with an


appreciation for fine culture, culinary and otherwise.”

Maitre D “Might I recommend that you vacate the premises at once, or will you be
requiring an escort?”

A “Where’s my ten bucks?”

F “Up your ass, I told you no deal.”

“Naser tugs a bit at Naomi’s arm, and she stomps back to the entrance in a huff
with him following.”

N “Hmph! Fang, I’ve decided this place isn’t good enough!”

“Sure.”

Nas “Don’t be mad Naomi, he isn’t worth getting upset about.”

F “Nah, he’s worth it. If it were me and the band they’d have one less tire on all
their cars.”

“Naser raises an eyebrow back at Fang.”

“She responds with a smirk and a middle finger.”

“...”

“We’ve been searching for a place for at least two hours now.”

“Fang is barely holding herself together, judging from her angry muttering.”

“A lot of muttering. Mostly including words like murder, knives, and particular
genitals as pin cushions, with profanity taking up a good half of what escaped her
beak.”
“I could see a blood vessel throbbing on her temple. This didn’t look good.”

“I position myself slightly behind Fang, putting her between me and Naomi.”

A “Hey Naomi, I got an idea!”

“Naomi spins on her heel towards the sound of my voice, and the giant grin on her
stupid snout stiffens as she sees Fang’s looming aneurysm.”

N “Maybe we should take a little break.”

“...”

“Luckily there’s a small park nearby.”

“The four of us grab some drinks from a vending machine.”

“Fang and I grab a knockoff brand of soda, Naomi got a bottle of water, and Naser
bought a sports drink.”

“We’re lucky to find an unoccupied picnic table with some shade, because the
afternoon sun has turned the cool day into a sweltering hot one.”

“Thank you, coastal weather.”

“We sit in near silence aside from Nasers’ audible chugging of his sports drink.”

“He crushes the bottle in one hand and tosses it into a trash can five yards away,
then looks to us with the smuggest grin to ever be seen on a beak.”

A “Showoff.”

Nas “Yes.”

N “Great shot, Naser!”

Nas “Of course it was, babe.”

“Fang mock retches into the grass.”


Nas “At any rate, I need to drain the snake.”

“What.”

“Naser turns and gives a brief wave back to us, and makes his way to the public
restroom on the other side of the park.”

N “Aww, his double-entendres are always so clever!”

“Fang slaps a hand over her eyes.”

F “I need to go too.”

N “Why? Something the matter?”

F “Monthly problems.”

N “Do you have everything you need?”

N “I have some extras stocked!”

N “I have regular, plastic, scented…”

N “Oh, what diameter do-”

F “Shut up now.”

“Fang stomps away to the bathroom, leaving just the apricot asspain”

“...And me.”

N “Do you need to use the restroom as well, Anon?”

“How tempting.”

A “Well, now that you mention it, I-”

N “Since it’s just the two of us, I’ve been wanting to ask for a while.”

N “How have things been going with Fang? Has she been well? Is there anything
wrong?”
--Pointless decision. Only here for retards that don’t understand subtlety
>>Fine, I guess?
>>Shouldn’t Naser know?

A “...Fine, I guess?”

N “Just ‘fine’ Anon? Are you sure?”

“There’s something in her tone of voice.”

A “...Are you implying something?”

“Naomi smiles sweetly but there’s a wicked glint in her eyes.”

N “Well you were so nervous this morning. And you haven’t been saying much on this
double date.”

“I feel my cheeks heat up.”

A “I-it isn’t a date! I’m just helping the band out is all!”

N “But you want it to be a date.”

“Her statement catches me off-guard.”

N “I know the date hasn’t been going to well so far-”

A “It isn’t a date, Naomi!”

N “But I’m sure I can help you sweep that girl off her feet-”

A “wha-”

N “You’ve been doing a great job so far, all she needs is a little more-”

A “STOP.”

“The bottle in my hand is a crumpled mess, spilling fizzly liquid across my white
knuckles.”
A “What. Did. You. Do.”

N “Me?”

“Naomi titters into her hand.”

“Her serpentine green eyes harden.”

N “Nothing.”

A “Bullshit. You were the one to pull this double date shit. What the hell did you
do.”

N “Hmmm…I did… Poor Fang needs all the help she can get after all.”

“I’m ready to lunge across this table.”

N “Why, all I ever hear from my dear sweet Naser is how sad Fang is.”

N “How depressed Fang is.”

N “How lonely Fang is.”

N “Fang Fang Fang Fang.”

“She meets my glare with her own.”

N “All the time.”

N “So.”

N “I decided to fix her.”

A “‘Fix’ her?!”

N “Oh, how simple a maiden’s heart is.”

N “All she really needs is someone in her life.”


N “To deal with her problems for her.”

N “To make her feel loved.”

N “You’ve been doing a wonderful job so far, Anon.”

A “And if I didn’t? What if I were to leave right now?”

N “And leave Fang here by herself?”

“...”

“Fucking bitch”

N “Ah, it’s written all over your face.”

N “I knew you two losers would be a match made in heaven.”

>>>Pointless convergence point here--

>>Shouldn’t Naser know?--

A “Shouldn’t Naser know?”

N “Yes, Naser knows, but I figure I’d ask you as well.”

N “Since the two of you spend so much time together and all.”

N “I hear Naser talking all the time about how worried he is for Fang.”

N “He’s such a good brother, isn’t he?”

“I’m just going to start filtering her.”

N “I just get so worried for her sometimes, too.”

N “Fang can just be so anti-social, you know?”


N “And she’s always avoiding me, too.”

N “I never can get a read on how she feels.”

N “Like when she was feeling upset a month or so ago.”

N “Or just after that concert she gave after winter break.”

“Wait.”

“Rewind a bit.”

A “How’d you know about how Fang felt sad a month ago?”

N “Oh, Naser told me!”

“...”

“The fuck is up with her?”

A “Then why ask me?”

N “You keep on asking that question!”

A “You keep on dodging that question.”

N “Hm? What am I dodging?”

A “Fang clearly doesn’t like you, you say so yourself.”

A “Yet you keep asking me about her.”

A “When you can just go to Naser.”

A “Fang is his sister after all.”

N “O-of course! It’s just I’d like to hear from you about her!”

A “Why me though? I don’t know anything about her, Naser knows Fang better than I
do.”
N “Because you two have been getting so close! You’re even on a date right now
Anon!”

“Naomi’s pupils dilate and her eyes dance away from me.”

N “In fact, you two make the cutest couple. Hahaha.”

“It’s the first time Naomi’s looked anything other than happy.”

A “Are you up to something?”

N “Why would I ever be up to something?”

A “Because you’re not making any sense.”

A “Naser knows her better than anyone else.”

A “But every time we talk you bring Fang up.”

A “Why?”

N “I have every reason to care!”

A “Why?”

N “Because-”

A “Why?!”

N “Because Naser wants to make Fang happy! A-and so do I, of course! ahahahaha!

“Naomi’s laugh is hollow. Her eyes shifting side to side.”

N “I was only doing what I thought was best for both her and you, Anon.”

“Wait.”

N “The first time I saw you, sitting on your own on that dirty old bench.”
N “You looked like you needed someone to lean on.”

“No…”

N “And with Fang…”

“I think back to all the times that the beige bitch had asked me about Fang.”

N “What a great opportunity for real friendship Anon! I’m so happy for you!”

Nas “...?”

A “...?”

N “If there’s anything Fang needs in these trying times, it’s a new friend to talk
to!”

“This entire time.”

N “ Wasn’t that Naser’s sister? How wonderful that you’re making friends, Anon!”

N “Tell me everything! What were you and Fang talking about? I didn’t know you were
friends!”

N “I wanna know all about it!”

“Fuck, why didn’t I notice?”

N “She’s all over the place, she needed someone to be her rock.”

“Naomi places a finger on her chin(?) for a moment and stares into space.
Suddenly, her face lights up.”

N “Oh! What if you asked Fang for help? I’m sure she’d lend a hand!”

A “I dunno... She’s usually busy with her own work, and I don’t want to bother her
more than I already do every day.”

N “It can’t hurt to ask, though, right? Just a thought.”

“That fucking bitch.”


“This entire time she’s been pushing me closer to Fang.”

N “I figured you two would be perfect for one another.”

“I must be the biggest fucking idiot.”

N “‘Uh… Anon? You’ve been spacing out.”

“She played me like a god damned fiddle!”

Nas “Did I miss something?”

“I look to Naser, who’s completely clueless to what Naomi has been doing for the
past month.”

“Just like I was.”

“What would he do in this situation?”

“He’s the boyscout here after all.”

“Fitting that the moral compass has a literal compass for a head.”

“I’m part of someone else’s plan.”

“Nothing I’ve done in the last several months was a conclusion reached on my own.”

“Are my feelings for Fang also just a tool for Naomi?”

“What do I even do here?”

>>Excuse Myself
>>Wait for Fang

>>Excuse Myself

“I need to get away from here, fast.”

A “Actually, I need to use the bathroom myself now.”


N “Oh, sure! We’ll be here!”

“I soullessly start dragging my feet away from Naomi.”

Nas “ANON. WAIT!”

“I freeze in place.”

Nas “Fair warning, watch the ceiling.”

“I sense great tragedy in those words…”

“Whatever. I don’t want to be here.”

“...”

“The public restroom looks clean enough from the outside, but I can see through the
open doors that it gets cleaned maybe once a week.”

“I’m not here to use the restroom anyways.”

“If I’m right, I just need to look behind the building, and…”

“Jackpot.”

“Fang is resting on the wall with a half finished cigarette between her fingers.”

A “Got a spare?”

“She shrugs half-heartedly, holding out the half-smoked sin-stick to me.”

“I hesitate.”

“Fang tilts her head. Before she can pull her hand back I accept the smoke.”

“The cherry at the end burns dimly as I tap off the ash.”

“‘It’s not an indirect kiss or anything like that’ I chant as a mantra.”


“The drag is smooth, with the hint of mint to it.”

“The smoke exhaled is wispy, and I can feel my skin prickle.”

“I don’t know whether it’s because of the nicotine or whose lips I tasted.”

“Fuck.”

A “Thanks.”

“I hand her back the cigarette.”

F “Mmm…”

“Fang’s tail drums a steady rhythm on the wall as she takes one last, long drag.”

“She blows out a heavier cloud and drops the stump on the ground.”

“I stamp on the stub before she can, giving it a solid twist before kicking the
dead end into the grass.”

F “How’d you find me?”

A “Where else would you be?”

“She gives a brief shrug.”

A “Anyways, we could probably get away with ditching Naser and Naomi.”

F “How’d you manage that?”

A “Secret family technique.”

F “Pssh.”

“Suddenly an image of Fang’s dad pops in my mind and I realize I probably shouldn’t
be seen alone with her behind a public restroom, under penalty of ‘holy shit my
spleen is outside my body’.”

A “Let’s get out of here.”


F “Alright. Let’s get a move on.”

“The two of us peek from behind the building to make sure the coast is clear of any
brothers or scheming persimmon piranhas.”

“The coast is clear.”

F “I think I know where to look.”

A “Please tell me it’s not in this shitty Promenade place.”

F “Nah, it’s in Lil Tru.”

A “...Where?”

F “Little Troodon. It’s near enough that we can walk there.”

A “Why didn’t you mention it before?”

F “Naomi.”

A “Ah.”

“The two of us sprint conspicuously across the park to the nearest cover in the
concrete jungle.”

“...”

>>go to Convergence Point a

>>Wait for Fang

“... No.”

“It doesn’t matter if my feelings are being used.”

“They’re still real to me.”

“And I want to actually help her.”


“Right now that means helping her find a venue.”

“Even if it means being around the coral cunt.”

Nas “Hey, Naomi, did you know that thirteen percent of public restrooms…”

“Naser babbles with Naomi while we wait for Fang to return.”

F “Alright, I’m done taking a dump or whatever.”

F “Let’s go.”

Nas “Wait… Why do you smell like smoke?”

F “Uh… I went to Hong Kong for a bit. Let’s go.”

Nas “You know you aren’t supposed to be smoking, Fang.”

F “Just drop it, dork.”

F “You don’t see me bringing up that leopard mankini you have in your closet.”

“Naser’s skin turns a noticeably lighter shade.”

A “That the only thing in the closet?”

F “Oh, of fucking course not.”

F “He’s also got this pink-”

Nas “I’M GOING TO STOP YOU RIGHT THERE.”

N “Why don’t we continue on now!”

“Naomi is holding a handkerchief to her nose, with a prominent splotch of red


that’s steadily growing.”

F “Fffffffffffffffffffffffffffiiiiinally.”
“...”

“Not even ten minutes later and we’re back where we started.”

N “-isn’t this one perfect! The stage is so well lit and-”

“Fang seems seconds away from a successful recreation of Jing Ke’s assassination of
King Zheng.”

“I know it’s wrong to poke a hornet’s nest, but…”

A “Fang, you alright?”

F “I hate everyone here.”

A “Ah.”

“Well then.”

“Fang’s about to commit homicide.”

“I should ask Naser to just split off for a while…”

“Naomi would back me up if I can convince her I’m taking Fang out on a d-EVENT.”

“I really don’t want Naomi’s help, though.”

“I could get Fang to ask Naser to break off, but uh…”

“She’s on the verge of fratricide too right now.”

Nas “Hey, Anon, you alright?”

A “Hm?”

Nas “You’ve got this intense look on you.”

A “Oh, sorry.”

A “Just… Trying to think of good places.”


“Guess it’s now or never.”

>>Ask Naser
>>Ask Fang

>>Ask Naser

A “Actually, Naser.”

Nas “Hm?”

“Naser slows his gait so he’s walking next to me.”

Nas “Something on your mind?”

“I lean in and start whispering.”

A “Yeah…”

A “It may be a good idea to split into groups.”

Nas “Ha, you’re funny.”

“Naser’s brow grows slick with sweat.”

“Christ what did his dad tell him?”

“This is gonna be difficult.”

A “Take a look at her man.”

A “You know she doesn’t get along with Naomi.”

“His eyes shift back, catching sight of Fang’s poorly withheld anger.”

Nas “...Ugh…”

A “It’s only a matter of time before things go nuclear.”


A “And as much as I’d find a catfight amusing, neither of us want to see Fang and
Naomi duke it out.”

Nas “...”

Nas “... Be that as it may…”

Nas “We still can’t split.”

Nas “I’m supposed to be keeping an eye on you two right now.”

N “what are we whispering about?”

“RAPTOR-JESUS FUCK.”

“Naomi has circled around behind us and pokes her head between Naser and I.”

Nas “Don’t worry about it, babe.”

Nas “Anon just wanted to split the group for a bit.”

N “...”

N “...”

N “That’s a wonderful idea!”

Nas “But babe, you know I’m supposed to-”

N “I think you should trust Anon a bit more!”

A “Do you really think I’m the frisky type?”

“Naser looks at me for a moment.”

Nas “Yes.”

A “Wow.”
Nas “It’s true.”

N “I mean...”

A “A) Go fuck yourselves.”

A “And B) I’m not some degenerate.”

N “Still, despite his looks, the Anon I know won’t end up doing anything weird!”

Nas “...You really think so?”

N “Sure!”

Nas “... You promise to not make it weird or anything, right?”

A “I-I… What? Whatever, no, of course not.”

N “Seems it’s settled then!”

N “Come on, Naser! We’ll go look on the east side of town!”

Nas “... Alright…”

Nas “I trust you, Anon.”

“Naomi grabs Naser by the arm and leads him around a corner and onto another
street.”

“Naser gives one last worried look back before he’s out of sight.”

F “What were the three of you huddling about?”

“Fang was walking behind us this whole time? I didn’t notice.”

A “Oh, I was just getting rid of them.”

F “Oh, man, you’re a lifesaver.”

A “Seemed like it was either this or someone ends up with a black eye.”
F “You think I’d stop at a black eye?”

>>Move to Convergence point b

>>Ask Fang

A “Don’t worry about it.”

Nas “Alright…”

“He looks ahead again, paying great attention to Naomi’s spergery.”

“I turn to Fang again.”

A “Hey, if you don’t want to stay in a group, why don’t you ask Naser to split off
for a while?”

F “Why me?”

A “He’ll listen to you.”

A “He’s only doing this because your dad put him up to it.”

A “I think he trusts you enough to be willing to take Naomi elsewhere for a while.”

F “Hm…”

A “Give him a chance.”

“Fang looks in contemplation at Naser walking ahead of us.”

F “Ehh, might as well try.”

F “Hey, Stephen Ha-Wing!”

A “Wait, that’s not how-”

Nas “Yeah?”
A “He responded to it?!”

F “Can you take your girlfriend and fuck off elsewhere?”

F “Me and her just aren’t going to get along.”

F “And it’d cover more ground.”

“Naser slows down a bit.”

Nas “I uh… Don’t think that’s a great idea.”

Nas “We should stick together, right Naomi?”

N “Well…”

“Two can play this game you citrine psycho.”

“I look at Naomi and give her a subtle nod.”

#[Keikaku Naomi here.]

N “I think it’s a wonderful idea, we can check in the Promenade! Oh I know this
wonderful cafe and-”

F “Great. Now fuck off.”

Nas “H-hold on a second!”

Nas “Dad said he’ll do to me anything that you do to Fang!”

F/A/N “...What…”

Nas “Fang, you gotta promise to not let Anon do anything creepy.”

A “That’s fuckin’ rude.”

“Fang looks at me and grins wickedly.”


Nas “Please Fang.”

F *sigh* “I promise.”

F “Now go.”

“Naser gulps and nods.”

Nas “You better not do anything creepy Anon!”

“With that Naser and Naomi leave, turning the corner onto another street.”

>>move to Convergence point b

>>Convergence point b

“...”

“Now it’s just the two of us.”

“Alone.”

“Oh and there’s the alarms again. I think I’m finally starting to tune them out
though.”

“Fang reaches into her pocket and withdraws a crumpled back of cigarettes.”

A “Got a spare?”

“She shrugs half-heartedly, holding out the pack to me.”

“There’s one left.”

“I hesitate.”

“Fang tilts her head. Before she can pull her hand back I accept the last smoke.”

“I bring the butt to my lips, feeling the pod within the filter.”

A “Figures you smoke menthols.”


F “Oh shut up. And you better share, I don’t think I’ll be getting a fresh pack any
time soon.”

“She hands me her lighter, a little cheap pink Bic.”

“It’s quick and easy, no wind to worry about as my thumb rolls over the top and the
tiny ember of a flame sears the end of the cigarette.”

“I pop the pod with my incisor and pull in slowly.”

“The draw is smooth, with a hint of mint to it.”

“The cherry at the end burns dimly as I tap off the ash.”

“The smoke exhaled is wispy, and I can feel my nerves ease.”

F “Ha, pussy.”

A “It’s your last one, wanna savor it.”

“I hand her back the cigarette.”

“‘It’s not an indirect kiss or anything like that’ I chant as a mantra.”

“Her drag is harsher, burning up twice the amount.”

“She blows out hazy rings, one after another, as if signaling an indigenous Raptor
tribe.”

A “Trying to show off now?”

F “Bet you can’t do it.”

“Fang grins as she hands the stick back to me.”

A “You trigga-lipped it.”

F “It’s still good, man.”


“The filter feels moist between my index and middle knuckles.”

“I bring the smoke back to my lips, trying to ignore the wetness of it.”

“I draw in even more, burning up another quarter of it.”

“I can feel my skin prickle as I exhale a thicker fog.”

“I don’t know whether it’s because of the nicotine or whose lips I imagine I
taste.”

“Fuck.”

F “Ha, called it.”

A “Mmm. Yeah, I can’t.”

“Fang’s tail ticks a steady rhythm like a metronome as she takes one last, long
drag.”

“She blows out a thick cloud and drops the stump on the ground.”

“I stamp on the stub before she can, giving it a solid twist before kicking the
dead end into the street.”

A “So now what?”

F “I think I know where we can look.”

A “Please tell me it’s not in this shitty Promenade place.”

F “Nah, it’s Lil Tru.”

A “...Where?”

F “Little Troodon. It’s near enough that we can walk there.”

A “Why didn’t you mention it before?”

F “Naomi.”
A “Ah.”

“Fang leads the way, navigating us away from this overly expensive part of town.”

>>go to Convergence Point a

>>Convergence Point a

“...”

“Little Troodon is completely unlike the rest of the city.”

“Instead of skyscrapers and glass buildings, the whole place is a series of


interconnected alleyways forming a plaza.”

“Mostly booths for scamming vendors, but every now and then an actual building can
be seen.”

“Countless salesmen call out to Fang and I.”

“Fang just strides past all of them.”

F “Just don’t make eye contact.”

“She must know the place.”

“One child runs up and gives me a flower to mark me for pickpockets.”

“I toss it in the nearest bin.”

F “Good eye.”

A “Living in the ass-end of this place, I’ve picked up a thing or two.”

“The two of us check the sparsely located buildings one by one.”

“I make sure to mark down the foreign swears in a notepad to look up later.”

“Several hours pass as both the sun and the temperature drops.”
F “Can’t believe we’re still looking.”

F “These people are usually looking for any way possible to attract customers.”

A “Maaaaybe you shouldn’t have insulted that one guy…”

F “Fuck him… callin’ me a meteor dodger… fucking prick.”

A “Still, we must have checked dozens of places by now.”

A “But why won’t anyone have a band?”

???(passing shopkeeper) “Her Reputation, it does so Precede her.”

“Fang’s pupils contract.”

“Not this again.”

F “HER?!?!You people are all the same! Thinking that you have to go off-”

A “Fang!”

F “WHAT!”

??? “As you can see, her Reputation, does Precedes her.”

F “Choke on a platter of cocks.”

??? “Everyone here, knows of her, especially of her family.”

F “A full platter! Stacks high!”

“I look at the…”

“What the fuck am I looking at?!”

??? “Do not think thoughts you cannot, Perceive.”

“Reed’s uncle then.”


??? “The uncle you seek is elsewhere.”

A “what”

??? “Yes, I know of that, which you, oh so, Desperately seek.”

F “Wait, you know a venue? Where?!”

??? “But first, the Ritual, that must be Conducted.”

“Finally, progress.”

F “No way!”

A “Tell us.”

“Anything to get away from this guy.”

??? “We will, Partake, in the ancient humiliation that has slain, my entire
lineage.”

??? “Even my own, Family, offed in this deadly sport before I was even born.”

??? “The humiliation is diabolically easing, a Clutching, of earthly currency.”

??? “For as long, as I can stand to hold it.”

??? “And to the victorious, my own artifact holding me to this flimsy visage, a
Phone Roomba.”

A “...A phone roomba.”

??? “Only the finest tool to clean your phone.”

??? “Here, let me show you it’s brushing majesty.”

“He feels around his fanny-pack for one of the roombas, then holds his phone out on
one hand.”
“He puts the device on, and it whirrs to life, slowly crossing the screen.”

“When it got to the edge, it beeped and turned around, making a return trip to
where it started.”

“After a few trips, the merchant turns the roomba off and gives us an expectant
leer.”

F “... I just use my shirt though…”

A “...”

>>At least it’s a novelty.


>>No way am I paying forty bucks on this shit.

>>At least it’s a novelty.

A “Fuck it, fine.”

>>No way am I paying forty bucks on this shit.

A “Fang, we can find the place on our own.”

??? “You know, this place is well known for trafficking.”

A “Fine you fucking cunt.”

“I slap down the money on Reed’s maybe-family’s booth.”

??? “Very well, the contest is yours, along with this trinket.”

??? “Head east, of this filthy Bizarre, and you will find your Destiny…”

??? “At Dino-Moe’s.”

A “The pizza chain?”

??? “You will come to understand my wisdom once you reach it. Fare the well,
seekers of Musical Amphitheaters.”

“The shopkeeper gives one last smug wave to us.”


“I motion for Fang to follow and start heading in the direction the shopkeeper
showed me.”

“...”

“After twisting through the endless maze of merchants and frivolities Fang finally
stops in front of a building.”

A “We’re here.”

“The building is an ancient antiquated italian restaurant, with the words ‘DINO-
MOE’S PIZZA & PASTA’ written on a grand sign out front.”

F “Pizza, huh?”

F “In the middle of Little Trudoon?”

A “Let’s see.”

“I open the double doors for Fang to enter.”

“There’s a plaque for the National Register of Historic Places on the window.”

A “Historical, huh?”

“Inside is a homely italian styled pizzeria.”

“The warm candle lighting against the lattice dividers of the booths casts shades
of orange along the walls and floor.”

“The two of us walk up to the reception desk.”

“A very tired waitress puts on a plastic smile when she sees us.”

Waitress “Welcome to historic Dino-Moes, table for two?”

A “Actually, we just need to ask the manager something.”

“The waitress rolls her eyes and skulks off.”


F “Service with a smile, huh?”

A “Working in the industry grates on you.”

F “This is a historical place though, isn’t it?”

F “Wouldn’t they have higher standards for-”

Moe “AYYYYYY IF IT ISN’T LITTLE LUCY!”

“Fang’s skin goes several shades lighter.”

Moe “I HAVEN’T SEEN YA SINCE AUGUST!”

Moe “C’MERE AND GIVE UNCLE MOE A HUG!”

“An older t-rex hobbles his way to us with arms spread wide.”

“Well, as wide as he could at least.”

“Fang squawks in protest as she’s pressed into his apron covered belly.”

F “U-uncle M-Moe? What are you doing here?”

Moe “I’m workin’, toots!”

Moe “Dis is my restaurant!”

A “Hold up. Your uncle is Moe. Moe as in the Moe that started Dino-Moe’s?”

F “No! I mean… I don’t know!”

Moe “HAHAHAHA AH MY BABY GIRL ASN’T SWUNG BY IN AGES!”

Moe “AN’ WHO BE DIS LUCKY GUY? DON’T TELL ME YA GOTS YERSELF HITCHED ALREADY!”

“I feel my own skin warm up now. The old T-Rex laughs louder and slaps his rotund
belly.”

Moe “Relax kids, I’m messin’ wit ya. Come on I’ll gives ya da bes’ seats in da
house.”

“Moe wraps an arm around each of our shoulders and drags us through the restaurant
to a cozy yet dark booth sequestered away from the rest.”

“We’re shoved into the seats and the owner/uncle bends over the table to light the
sole candle there.”

“I’m having a candle-lit dinner with Fang now.”

“...”

“The hell is happening?!”

Moe “Now yous twos wait right there while I make my lil princess’ favrite pie. On
me, o’ course.”

“Moe proceeds to saunter off, pushing through the double doors that probably led to
the kitchen.”

“I look over the candle to Fang.”

“She looks how I feel at the moment.”

“Lost and confused.”

A “...What just happened…”

F “...I don’t know…”

A “So…”

“Fuck. Come on Anon, you can do it. You were part of the team that kicked reddit’s
ass in Claws of Duty: Jurassic Warfare.”

A “Is that really your uncle?”

F “No, he’s just a good family friend.”

F “My dad goes bowling every Thursday with him.”


A “Sounds fun.”

A “You ever go along?”

F “Not anymore.”

F “All that sportsy stuff doesn’t appeal to me.”

F “Besides, I have school and band stuff to worry about.”

F “Not to mention my dad’s a bit of an asshole.”

“The image of a golf club comes to mind.”

A “You don’t say?”

F “Uh huh.”

F “Whenever I’m listening to my music at night he always yells through the door
about ‘audible bowel movements’.”

A “Honestly, do you blame him?”

“Fang smirks.”

F “Maybe not.”

A “My dad isn’t even really there most of the time.”

A “When I do interact with him, it’s just these huge orders about what to do with
myself.”

A “You’re going to camp, you’re going to Brazil, you’re going to some coastal town
for half a year.”

A “Then again, that last one was more my fault.”

F “Sounds rough.”

F “What about your Mom?”


A “What about her?”

A “Pretty standard mother, a bit naggy.”

A “She’d always try to dress me for school, so i’d look like the biggest dork
ever.”

A “One time she got me into a denim jacket and jeans combo.”

F “The Double-Denim Disaster! PFfffffft.”

A “How’d you know- waaaaaaiiit a second.”

F “Another word and you get hot wax in your face.”

“I’m holding back my laughter behind my fist.”

A “And she’d always try to embarrass me in front of everyone.”

F “Don’t all moms do that?”

A “Why don’t you tell me, Pirate Princess?”

“You know, hot wax really only hurts for the first few seconds.”

“That cute look of surprise though? Lasting for eternity.”

F “Breathe a word of that to anyone and this candle is going up where the sun don’t
shine while it’s still lit.”

“I scrape the hardened wax on my forehead off with one hand.”

A “Alright alright. Sheesh. But what about your mom?”

A “Is she like, on heroin or something?”

F “Ha, no. She’s just… Always in her own little world.”

F “Nothing is ever wrong, there’s no flaws with anything…”


F “No concern is worth worrying about.”

A “Ah. Yeah, that can’t be healthy.”

F “Eh, I’ve made do so far.”

A “Well, for what it’s worth, you’ve still got Trish, Reed, and Naser.”

F “Pffft. Yeah, the one whose horn is more important than finding a place, my
shitty baby brother, and Reed.”

“Fang groans as she leans back in her seat.”

F “The new guy is the only one I can rely on. My life sucks.”

A “Hmmmm, I dunno…”

F “We haven’t found a venue and our show is in a week. Gah! Fuckin’ Naomi! Fuckin’
Dad!”

A “On the flip-side, we’re getting some of your favorite pizza at one of the
pricier italian places around. For free too.”

F “But the venue…”

A “We still have time. So, pizza first and then we find a place for your show.”

Moe “Someone say pizza?”

Moe “Someone order a fuckin’ pizza?!”

“Moe slides a large pizza onto the table in front of us.”

Moe “A pizza with extra sausage, anchovies, pepperoni, and ham, also known as the
Moe’s Original Meateor Pizza, Lucy’s favorite!”

F “I go by Fang now, actually.”

Moe “Whoa-hoa! The youth are getting uppity with me!”


Moe “Ya try’na make ol’ Moe confused, ya punk?”

“He gives Fang a light noogie.”

Moe “So what’ve you punks been up to?”

A “Actually, mister Moe, we were going to ask-”

Moe “Mister? Young punk ya don’ need ta be so formal.”

“AAAAArgh fuck my head.”

Moe “You younguns, I ‘eard ya talkin’ bout yer parents.”

“Ah man, here comes the lecture.”

Moe “You know, the best part bein’ young is-”

Waitress “Mooee!!”

Waitress “We got a code K on line 1!”

“Moe hangs his head in despair.”

Moe “‘Old dat thought, kids. I’ze gots a pissed off motha ta deal wit.”

“Moe stomps away to the reception desk, leaving Fang, the Pizza, and me.”

F “Hey, free food.”

“Fang piles three slices on a plate, catching a few of the anchovies before they
slide off.”

“I think I'll only take one, I’d rather not get heartburn at eighteen.”

“Man, this place sure isn’t historical for no reason.”

“Even something as ridiculous as this tastes phenomenal.”

“Good thing it’s free, I’d be willing to pay a premium for this stuff.”
“Kicks Comet Pizza’s ass any day of the week.”

F “It really hooks you in, don’t it?”

“Oh, I didn’t realize I was in my own world for a bit.”

A “Uh, yeah.”

A “It’s real good.”

“Huh, she’s already down two slices?”

F “Shame I have to limit myself around the good stuff.”

“Fang picks up her last slice, tosses it in the air…”

“...and snaps it out of the air with one bite.”

A “Whoa.”

A “Cool trick. Do you do parties?”

“While she raises her middle finger at the remark, the grin on Fang’s face says
it’s more out of humor than malice.”

F “You gonna finish that?”

“I look at my half eaten slice. I guard my hoard with an arm bulwark.”

A “Mine.”

F “Heh. Didn’t want it anyway.”

A “Mine.”

“I’m quick to finish off my slice to keep it to myself while Fang goes for her
second helping.”

“The pizza doesn’t last, sadly, as we continue to take slices. Its’ life is ended
in a matter of minutes, when otherwise I would have committed pastacide in an
hour.”
“By the end I’m satisfied, enjoying the feeling of the itis.”

F “Aaaah… Uncle Moe knows just how to make it.”

A “Yeah, your uncle is pretty cool.”

“Fang gets out of her seat, legs unsteady as she fights off the need for a well
needed nap.”

F “I’ll see ya at the front. I’ve got a serious need. For real this time.”

“I snicker and nod.”

A “Sure, leave me to deal with your Uncle.”

“I force myself out of the booth and casually meander to the reception area.”

“Moe is there placing the receiver of the desk’s phone back.”

Moe “‘Ey son, youse enjoy da meal?”

A “Definitely. Feel like I’mma black out any second.”

Moe “Hahaha. Dat’s what I like ta hear!”

Moe “Glad to make yas date, then.”

A “A-ah, uh… we aren’t-”

Moe “No? Coulda fooled me wit’ dat disaster youse called flirtin’.”

A “No, really!”

A “Fang’s looking for a venue.”

A “Her band is planning a show for next week.”

Moe “Reeeaaally now. Why not have it here den?”


“I look around at the restaurant, trying to find any real place for the band to
actually play.”

Moe “Ay, dun sweat the details, kid.”

“Moe grins.”

Moe “Me and da boys are used to makin’ room for shows.”

Moe “Youse jus tell ma l’il Lucy ya got a place, then yas sure ta sweep ‘er of ‘er
feet.”

A “ah er wha I th huh?”

“Anon.exe has failed.”

Moe “Ah ta be young and in love.”

Moe “listen here, Anon.”

Moe “I segreti dell’amore, the secret ta love…”

Moe “It’s not shared mis’ry. Youse can complain bout all da lil details in life.”

Moe “But dat don’t fix yas problems.”

Moe “Howeva!”

Moe “Yas can’t be tryna do everythang for her neitha.”

Moe “Othawize she’d jus expec ya ta fix all her problems for her.”

Moe “The secret is support!”

A “...Support?”

Moe “Ay, youse gots ta be her support. She gots ta fix her own problems, but youse
gots ta back her up on dem.”

Moe “An’ from what I hear from ma boy Nasa, you’ve already been dun dat.”
“I suppose I have. Like at her band practice, or on the roof.”

Moe “Like now!”

Moe “Hahahahaha BADA BING!”

??? “BADA BOOM.”

Moe “Back ta work Jerry!”

Moe “Anyway.”

Moe “Be good ta her, Anon. She’ll be good ta youse, I raised her right afta all.”

A “Err, thanks, Moe.”

Moe “Ay, anytime.”

Moe “I’ve been hangin’ around youse fools for too long, I can’t jus’ ignore the
kitchen anymore, youse know?”

Moe “Give little Lucy my regards, huh?”

A “Sure.”

“Moe saunters back to the kitchen.”

“Now that I think about it, how does he cook with those little arms?”

“I look a bit closer, there’s several toy claws hanging on a rack just inside the
kitchen door.”

“Somehow I don’t think that was something I was supposed to see.”

F “Alright, I’m back.”

F “Let’s hit the road.”

F “Maybe we’ll find somewhere to play before sundown.”


A “Actually, we really don’t.”

“Fang freezes in place.”

F “How?”

A “Your Uncle.”

F “You… Asked Uncle Moe if my band could play?”

A “Yeah, he seemed pretty excited about it.”

A “He’s got a stage ready and everything.”

“Fang still isn’t moving…”

“Did I do something wrong?”

“It’s a blur of motion.”

“One second Fang looks like she’s going to start hyperventilating.”

“Next it’s like I’m wrapped in a blanket of down feathers.”

“Being shaken from side to side.”

“With a tinnitus inducing scream right in my ear.”

F “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WE GOT A VENUE AAAAAAAAA”

“It’s so infectious.”

“My arms reflexively support her, wrapping around below her wings.”

“Fang’s arms are wrapped around my shoulders as she clings to me.”

“I feel something warm, soft and somewhat moist press against my cheek.”
F “WE GOT A VENUE WE GOT A VENUE WE GOT A VEN- AH!”

“All movement stops and reality resumes.”

“Fang’s wings withdraw from around us.”

“Fang pulls away until only her hands are on my shoulders.”

“My hands are now at her sides and I can feel her warm scales on my palms.”

“Oh.”

“Wow.”

“I uh…”

“...huh…”

“It’s the sound of clapping that causes us to jump apart, faces bright red and
breath rapid.”

“Back at the kitchen door is Moe, clapping loudly with his miniscule arms.”

A “Er… I suppose we uh…”

F “Um…”

A “Call… Naser?”

F “Y-yeah, a-and tell him… right?”

A “Totally. VVURM DRAMA’s got a venue!”

“Fang smiles softly and nods.”

“Good thing Naomi put Naser’s number in my phone.”

“Even though I didn’t ask for it.”

“The tone rings twice.”


Nas “Yes?”

A “Hey, Naser.”

Nas “Hold on, I’ll put you on speaker.”

Nas “Go ahead.”

A “Mission accomplished, we got a venue set up.”

N “Oh, they did?”

N “That’s great!”

A “Yeah, we’re at Dino-Moe’s place in Little Troodon.”

Nas “Cool.”

Nas “I’ll bring the NasCar over in a jiffy!”

“I’m going to punch him.”

N “You sure you want us to get you now?”

N “Now that you have business out of the way you and Fang could go do something
fun!”

A “...”

“You know, it may not be such a bad idea.”

“Even if it’s an idea from the Orchid Oppressor.”

“...”

“Good lord, I’m never going to be able to play golf again.”

A “I’ll pass. It’s getting pretty dark.”


N “Aww…”

Nas “Alright, stay put and we’ll be there soon.”

A “Alright.”

A “See you.”

“All’s left is to wait a few minutes for the ride to get here.”

“Fang is sitting on a bench in front of one of the restaurant windows.”

“She’s humming to herself, and her tail is drumming eurobeat on the bench.”

“I take a seat next to her.”

“By now the plaza has cooled down, most shops have closed and the only people still
out are returning home after the long day.”

“The two of us sit in companionable silence save for Fang’s humming and tail
drumming.”

“Her mood is contagious and soon enough I’m humming with her.”

“I already know the song.”

“It’s from the roof.”

“Except more… more…”

“Happy.”

“The scene is great.”

“Just Fang and I on a bench in the waning sunlight in the middle of a deserted
plaza.”

“Taking the moment in, I almost don’t notice Fang scooting closer to me.”

“...”
Nas “Mom! Dad! We’re home!”

“The ride back to Fang’s house went by uneventfully.”

“Fang and I didn’t talk about what happened so Naser didn’t have an aneurysm.”

FangMom “Oh! Welcome home, Naser dear!”

FangMom “How did your date go?”

FangMom “I’m just dying to know!”

FangDad “I am also interested.”

“I don’t know how but he’s looking into the exact center of my pupils with no
margin of error.”

FangDad “So, Ayy-non, how was your trip with my little girl?”

F “Dad!”

FangMom “Why don’t you go get ready for bed Lucy.”

“Fang glowers.”

FandDad “Lucy your mom-”

“I look to Fang…”

“Okay, yeah. It was a date.”

A “It went well, sir.”

FangDad “What did-”

A “We were able to find a venue, and I met Fang’s Uncle Moe.”

“Fang’s dad sputters.”


FangDad “I’ve half a mind of bringing you to the station boy!”
FangDad “And the other half of testing my new nightstick on ya!”

FangMom “Dear! Not in front-”

A “I wouldn’t mind doing this again.”

“Oh wow. The look on Fang’s face is really cute.”

FangMom “Oh I’m so happy for you two!”

“I wave as I turn to the door.”

A “I’ll see you at school Fang.”

F “Y-yeah. You too, Anon!”

“With that I exit the door. Once it’s closed I can feel all that bravado evaporate
and my legs turn to jelly.”

“I think that’s enough excitement for one day. My first step forward towards the
bus stop is so wobbly I worry I’ll end up in Fang’s Mom’s rose bush.”

“It would probably be a good idea to sit a bit and catch my breath before going
home, and take a seat on the curb just outside Fang’s house.”

“The door behind me slams open and I jerk around to see Naser being shoved down the
steps.”

FangDad “-and don’t come back until you’re finished thinking!”

“The door slams again and I hear a morose sigh.”

Nas “Aw man… Anon?”

A “...yeah…”

Nas “Why’re you sitting here?”

A “Just catching my breath. Your dad’s a bit...”


Nas “Harsh?”

A “Homicidal, but close enough.”

“Naser huffs and shoves his hands back into his pockets.”

Nas “You know you’re the reason dad kicked me out, right?”

A “What? I know he’s pissed I so much as looked at Fang but what did you do?”

Nas “Turns out letting you run off with Fang is just ‘encouraging your degeneracy’
or something.”

--A “Excuse him, I don’t need any such encouragement.”

“Sighing, Naser drops to sit on the curb next to me.”

“He kicks a rock clean across the road and into the neighbors’ mailbox.”

A “Impressive.”

Nas “Hmph.”

A “Getting kicked out really got you that down?”

Nas “...Sure.”

A “Convincing. What’s the real answer?”

Nas “What’s it to you?”

A “Not much. Just figured I’d ask.”

“He stretches his wings and lays back on the pavement.”

Nas “Just figures it’d get to this.”

A “Get to what?”

Nas “Me getting punished for Fang’s issues.”


“Naser lays an arm over his eyes.”

Nas “Why’d you need to go alone?”

A “You saw her today, she was this close to killing your girlfriend.”

A “Honestly you should be thanking me for that.”

“He waves me away at that.”

Nas “Feh.”

A “Go on.”

Nas “You aren’t my therapist.”

A “Humor me.”

“Naser’s arm flops away from his face and onto the concrete.”

Nas “Ugh. I mean, look at it from my perspective.”

Nas “Fang is always up to something stupid... More often than not these days she’s
arguing with either me or my parents…”

Nas “At this rate, Fang’ll end up a junkie or in a prison somewhere.”

“I cringe at the mental image of junkie Fang.”

Nas “Mom and dad have pretty much accepted that, so who do you think all their
hopes and dreams go to?”

Nas “Me.”

“With a growl Naser sits back up.”

Nas “It’s like I’m not allowed to have problems of my own, not allowed to mess up
or do anything less than the best.”

A “Judging by the trophy case at school, you aren’t doing half bad.”
Nas “I wish it was an option to fail, I mean.”

Nas “Instead, I’m stuck with no room for error and still with a broken sister.”

Nas “And she’s still my sister, you know?”

Nas “I can’t help but be worried for her.”

Nas “But what can I do? She hates me, and I can’t bring up my worries with my
parents.”

Nas “Even Naomi notices I get stressed about it.”

Nas “I just want my sister to be happy, to go back to normal.”

Nas “But I don’t even remember what her normal {i}is{/i}!”

A “I don’t have siblings myself, but if I did I certainly would have trouble doing
all you’re able to.”

A “That selflessness by itself should help you, right?”

Nas “Selflessness? You kidding me?”

Nas “Her friends would be destroyed if Fang just… dropped all that.”

Nas “Who am I to even wish she were different?”

A “So you’re getting all this worked up and you aren’t sure it’s even the right
thing?”

Nas “... Yeah, I guess so.”

“I try and parse everything Naser’s bitched about up to now.”

“Guess it’s time for Dr. Mous’ psychological response.”

A “Y’know Naser, have you ever considered just… not?”


Nas “What?!”

“Naser practically lunges at me. I hold my hands up in supplication.”

“I consider what to say.”

“Moe’s advice drifts to the forefront of my thoughts.”

A “Hear me out. Just consider this.”

A “Maybe it’s not your job. I mean, you go out of your way to try and help her…”

A “Hell even Naomi has tried.”

A “But… Maybe Fang’s problem is her problem to fix.”

Nas “But-but-but-”

A “We met your uncle today.”

Nas “Uncle Moe?!”

A “Yeah, and he had some advice for me.”

A “He said she needs someone to support her. Not fix her problems for her.”

Nas “Isn’t that what I’ve been doing?”

A “Remember the show in the auditorium?”

“The perturbed pterosaur sags as he recalls that disaster.”

Nas “Oh…”

A “Look man, you’ve got a lot of problems of your own.”

A “Maybe you should handle those first before you try to fix your sister’s.”

Nas “Haaaaah. Well, if Uncle Moe said so…”


Nas “But why did he tell you that?”

“...shit…”

A “Err… y’know… just advice from an old guy.”

A “You know how they love to give advice.”

“His head shakes side to side, dismissing my dismissal.”

Nas “No way. Not Uncle Moe. He’d never give you the time of day.”

“Shitshitshitshitshit.”

A “Look, he just wanted to give me some advice for Fang and now I’m giving it to
you.”

A “So drop it.”

Nas “No way.”

Nas “Advice for Fang… saying it was a date…”

Nas “Do you like my sister?!”

A “I wasn’t the one to call it a-”

Nas “That…”

--Nas “Is pretty cringe, bro.”

Nas “Explains a lot, shit...”

A “But I didn’t-”

Nas “Oh god, what would Dad think of the kids?”

A “What the fuck?!”

Nas “Hell, if Dad finds out at all-”

A “NASER.”
“He pauses, the look of shocked disdain still stuck to his face.”

A “At this point it seems like you just {i}want{/i} to be a stressed mess.”

A “Maybe I do like your sister.”

A “Sure, she’s rude, violent, and maybe a bit bipolar.”

A “She’s impressionable, self-centered, stubborn, the list goes on.”

--Nas “And?”

--A “Nah, that’s it.”

Nas “Are you looking to taste some concrete?”

A “But beyond all that, there’s more to her.”

A “Like… Like her passion, Naser. She adores music. Adores {i}playing{/i} music.”

A “And she has theses… moments where I can see the softer side of her.”

“The pop of knuckles from Naser tells me I should rephrase that.”

A “I mean, it feels like I’ve gotten to see a side of Fang that she hasn’t shown
anyone else.”

A “A side that’s willing to give a loser like me the time of day.”

Nas “And that’s enough?”

A “I don’t know man, this is all uncharted water.”

A “Like, how did you and Naomi get together?”

Nas “That is… a very long story.”

A “How long?”
Nas “About two school semesters, thirty track-meets, and a school election.”

--A “Hang on, this is important. There wasn’t any voter fraud happening, was
there?”

--Nas “Nah… Though there was something about some Dominion company helping…”

A “So about a paperback book then?”

Nas “Sure, why not.”

“Naser hums and reclines back onto the pavement.”

Nas “Sheesh, how’d we wind up talking about our love lives?”

A “Speak for yourself, man, I know fuckall about this stuff.”

Nas “And you think I do?”

Nas “Naomi’s the one that makes all the plans and stuff.”

A “Seems like she does that a lot.”

Nas “Just the way she is.”

Nas “Anyway, I think dad’s had enough time and beer to cool down now.”

A “How long has it been?”

Nas “‘Bout an hour I think.”

A “Wait…”

“I swiftly withdraw my phone to check the time.”

A “Ah fuck, I’m gonna miss the last bus!”

Nas “I could give you a lift.”


“And let you find out I live in the shittiest part of town?”

A “Nah it’s fine. If I run I think I can make it.”

Nas “Well don’t let me keep you. I’ll catch ya at school, Anon.”

A “Yeah, sure thing.”

Nas “And for what it’s worth, you’re not like the monkeys we hear about all the
time on Dino News Network.”

Nas “The kind that hang around this part of town called Skin Row, y’know?”

“Just gonna ignore that.”

Nas “Thanks for sticking around a bit.”

Nas “It’s… nice to finally be able to tell someone all that.”

“I wave Naser goodbye as I get up and start jogging for the bus stop.”

“I’m mentally fatigued after everything that’s happened today.”

“I check my phone for the time.”

“Hmm….”

“I open up the browser and go to a familiar Sudetan Sword Swallowing IRC.”

“[Hey faggots, guess who just got back from a perfect date?]”

“Twelve replies from a single post, I think that’s a new record for me.”

...

--Nas “And why the fuck am I even telling you this?”

--A “I’m a certified uncertified dino-psychologist.”

“...”
8. Concert Day

“-One Week Later-”

“The week’s been a mix of excitement and trepidation.”

“More excitement from Fang and the band and trepidation on my part around Fang.”

“Having come to terms with how I feel, I just can’t stop noticing all the little
things she does.”

“Like her cute tail wagging to a silent tune.”

“Or her weird and funny way of eating.”

“Or how soft and huggable her wings look.”

“Raptor Jesus, if this is what love is I kind of want to sample buckshot.”

“And yet I don’t want it to stop.”

“Even now as Moe and Reed work on clearing the floor of tables and making a noise.”

“And I’m drooling like an idiot as I watch Fang bend over a large Amp.”

??? “Ahem”

“Even now her tail wags to that mysterious beat in her head.”

??? “AHEM”

“Not to mention the way those jeans hug her hips and ass-”

??? “AH-HEM!”

A “Hm?”

T “Aren’t you supposed to be helping?”


“Hm? OH SHIT RIGHT!”

A “Y-yeah, right! Just moving this table ahahaha.”

“I pick up the last table on the floor and hurriedly move it to the suspiciously
large storage room in the back of Dino-Moe’s.”

“I set the table down with the rest, right next to the seemingly out of place
buckets of cement mix.”

“Looking out from the closet, the joint is actually pretty big.”

“The area is a good one-hundred and fifty by two-hundred feet, so without the
tables there’s enough space for at least a few hundred people.”

“Impressed, I let out a low whistle.”

St “I’m on time, right?”

“Where did she come from?”

A “Hm? Who are you?”

St “We’ve met before...”

A “Wha- wait… Stella, right? From the school gardens.”

“She gleefully nods.”

St “Yes! Rosa should be coming any minute now, too!”

“I haven’t spoken to either of them since campus beautification.”

“Well, other than Stella through the bathroom door, but that doesn’t really count.”

“But Fang and the rest will be happy they have at least two fans, right?”

St “You know…”

St “There’s always room in the gardening club if you still want to join, Anon...”

“There’s no way I’m going back to that sort of prison labor.”


“I look the pale green, spine covered thing up and down.”

“Including the ‘OPPAI’ t-shirt she’s wearing.”

“What the fuck.”

A “Uh…”

A “Y-you {i}do{/i} know what your shirt says, right?”

“Stella gives me a quizzical look and glances down at her shirt, her face turning
bright red.”

St “Oh my… th-this was the only clean shirt I had…”

“If I didn’t feel the way I did about Fang, I’d think Stella’s stammering was kinda
cute.”

“Suddenly her face lights up and her eyes return to me.”

St “Wait… You like anime too, don’t you?”

“Play it cool, Anon. No need to reveal your power level.”

>>I used to when I was little.


>>I’ve seen a bit here and there.

>>I used to when I was little.


A “I saw some back in elementary school.”

>>I’ve seen a bit here and there.


A “Yeah, uh… a little bit.”

St “That’s amazing! I don’t have anyone else I can talk to about it!”

St “What’s your favorite anime? I loooove PreCure!”

“Raptor Jesus on his cross of rock.”

“It takes all my strength not to physically cringe.”

St “Oooh, we should watch it together sometime!”

St “I have the box set of every season!”

St “We could marathon it over a long weekend or something!”


A “Uh… maybe some other time...”

“I’ll just block my calendar for this… maybe for after the heat death of the
universe.”

A “Anyway, the show isn’t for another half-hour.”

St “I wanted to ask you before... what did you think of your fortune?”

A “Uh… I kinda forgot…”

St “You got the Judgement?”

A “Doesn’t ring a bell.”

St “O-oh… well… Uh… How would you like another?”

A “Eh… I got time to kill, sure.”

“She pulls her deck of tarot cards from… somewhere…”

“Where the fuck does she hide these things?”

“Anyway, she fans the deck out.”

St “Alright, take one.”

“I take one at random and show it to her.”

>>ko-op

St “Oh my, inverted Empress.”

St “You need to be wary about future negligence, Anon.”

>>doomer

St “Inverted Hermit.”

St “Anon, if you ever feel lonely you can come to me.”


>>tradwife

St “Inverted Hierophant.”

St “You need to be wary of your words and actions, Anon.”

>>golden

St “Upright Strength”

St “OH! I don’t think you need to worry about what’s to come, Anon.”

>>

A “The fuck does that mean?”

St “Uh… er… Gottago,naturecalls,seeyouattheshow!”

“She flees in denim pissing fear.”

“...Well then…”

“What was I doing?”

“Oh yeah.”

“I step up to the stage to see the band’s point of view.”

“And then promptly trip.”

“*FWAP*”

A “Argh!”

“What the fuck was that?!”

“There’s a loose cord over my foot.”


“That’s…”

“Probably not good for the show.”

“I stand up and wipe the dust from my pants.”

“Trish is the organizer…”

“Right now she’s giving Reed a lecture on why it’s probably a bad idea to put
carfentanyl in the smoke machine.”

A “Hey, Trish!”

“Trish looks over her shoulder and Reed’s face lights up.”

A “Can you come here a second?”

“Trish sighs, points between her eyes and Reed’s, and stomps over to the stage.”

T “Whaddayawant, skinnie?”

A “I just tripped on one of the wires up here.”

T “Sucks to be you.”

“Bitch.”

A “Should I plug them all into a surge protector so you guys don’t fall during the
concert?”

T “What?”

T “No, of course not.”

T “We won’t trip, I have that on good authority.”

A “Whose?”

T “...Reed’s.”
A “...”

T “...”

A “And you trust his word on something like this?”

T “Sure.”

T “He’s the expert on this stuff and all.”

“Before I can object, Trish turns away and runs after Reed who is huddled over the
smoke machine, pungent fumes wafting from it’s exposed innards.”

“Well, seems like he’s got that handled.”

“Trish seemed pretty confident that Reed knows what he’s doing with the stage.”

“But Reed obviously doesn’t understand cable management.”

>>Leave the stage as-is

“Reed may not understand cable management, but then again neither did I.”

“Probably better to let sleeping fossils lie.”

>>Fix the cables

“It could be a serious hazard if I leave them like this.”

“Like a fire hazard or something. I think.”

“I’ll just put them all on one of Moe’s surge protectors.”

“Aaaaaand done.”

>>Continues here

“Now that that’s taken care of, I glance at the pizza-themed clock on the wall.”

“Thirty minutes until the show starts.”


“The band is doing one last sound test, Reed’s bass drum bearing another new logo
for VVURM DRAMA that doesn’t look half bad.”

“Trish has a wicked grin on her face and I can practically see the dollar signs in
her eyes.”

“And Fang…”

“Fang looks anxious, hands wringing the strap of her hollowbody electric guitar.”

“I consider what I’m about to do extremely stupid but…”

A “Hey.”

“She jumps a little as I step back on stage. Her knuckles are bright white as they
strangle the leather strap.”

F “...Hey.”

Moe “The secret is support!”

“I offer her my most supportive smile.”

A “You’ve got this, Fang.”

F “Don’t feel like I do, though.”

A “You do. You’ve been practicing all month for this.”

A “And you’ve improved immensely since your last gig.”

A “I have complete faith in your ability to play guitar.”

A “Don’t worry so much.”

A “Just don't fret about it, you’ll be fine”

“Trish rolls her eyes, Reed’s vacant stare has a bit of approval.”

T “At least it wasn't a dinosaur pun this time.”


A “I'm not that unfunny!”

T “You are.”

A “Fuck you, I’m hilarious.”

T “No one thinks that, loser.”

A “Don’t you have something to be triggered about!”

T “YOU CAN’T USE THAT WORD, THAT’S OUR WORD!”

A “Just did, wanna see me do it again?”

F “Ladies, Ladies, please.”

F “Shut the fuck up.”

F “We’ve got sweet music to play.”

>>Leave the stage as-is

“Showtime”

F “Allright! Next up we got “The!”

“WHAT.”

“They go right into their next song with gusto.”

“...”

“An hour later and the band is wrapping up their last song for the night.”

“I take my eyes off the stage to get a read on the crowd.”

“Easily a good hundred people showed up to see VVURM DRAMA, better than any of us
expected.”

“The look on Fang’s face when everyone began filtering into the restaurant was
priceless.”

“They were on the last song of the night, the bizarrely long name of which I
missed.”

F “I JUST GOTTA ASK:”


“WHY IS HITLER”
“RIDING MY BIKE”
“PRETENDING TO BE”
“A MONKEY”

“Oh right… Reed definitely wrote this one.”

“The band really has improved, as opposed to booing and pointing at the audience is
listening intently.”

F “AT THREEEEEEE AAAAAAAA MMMMM”


“IN THE MORNIIIIIING!”
“ON A FUCKIN’ TUESDAAAAY!”

“After the song ends, VVURM DRAMA hangs onto the pose of their final note.”

“It’s silent.”

“I applaud the band, eventually some other patrons join in.”

“The applause turns to cheers, and the cheers turn to uproar.”

“The crowd was cheering.”

“Actually cheering this time.”

“The bandmates’ faces light up, and they all glance at each other.”

“The hard work has taken its toll on the three, giving them varying degrees of
perspiration.”

“The sweat is trickling down Fang’s forehead, Trish has gone from an afro to
dreadlocks, and Reed is providing the restaurant with a nice ocean scent.”

“Fang finishes with a furious flurry of strumming on her fretboard.”

F “Woooooooo! THANK YOU LITTLE TROODON!”


“The crowd’s approval is obvious, even in the makeshift mosh pit where I see Stella
getting fake curb-stomped.”

“At least I think it’s fake.”

“Rosa is on the other side of the room, too entranced by the music to care.”

“Eh, I don’t see any blood so she’s good.”

F “ANON!”

“Before I could react I was swept up in a blur of feathers.”

“Fang wrapped her arms and wings around me and kept rocking back and forth.”

F “OHMYGOD OHMYGOD WE DID IT WE DID IT”

F “THEY ACTUALLY LOVE VVURM DRAMA!”

“I tune out the alarms screaming in my head and hug her back.”

“Her wings are just as soft and huggable as they look.”

“Fang’s beak settles against my cheek, the warm scales sliding smoothly up and down
against it.”

“This is nice.”

"I become aware of my hands, planted firmly on the small of Fang’s back and
pressing her closer to me.”

“Beneath my splayed palms is soft, warm and drenched in sweat. I find that I don’t
really mind the slickness.”

T “Fang?”

“I feel like I could stay like this forever.”

T “Hellooo, Fang?”

“Fang suddenly flinches, and I get a split second view of a purple hand on her
shoulder.”
“Her face is beet red and the warmth in my own cheeks tells me I don’t look far
behind.”

“Trish looks like she’s sucked on a lemon with how twisted her face is.”

“The tiny triceratops pulls Fang out of my hands, and I can picture my fist
twisting that horn right off her face.”

T “Hmmm... “

A “Great show, right?”

T “I guess. For our first show, anyway.”

F “What? It was great though! Everyone was cheering!”

T “But it was a small crowd.”

A “Was it? The place was packed.”

T “Small venue. We gotta think bigger now.”

A “Why bigger?

T “Because I still have stock!”

“She motions to the bar, where there is still some hung up shirts with the new
mediocre logo lazily spray painted on.”

A “Have you sold much?”

T “Three buttons, four stickers, and an Apron!”

A “An apron?”

Moe “AY, KIDS!”

#moe now has vvurm drama apron

Moe “LOOKIT DIS ‘ERE AH-PRON YA LIL TRIGGA FRIEN SOL’ ME!”
“Trish looks split on whether to be mad about the trigga comment or happy about the
successful sale.”

??? “Hey! Someone took ma apron!”

Moe “GIT BACK TA WORK JERRY YER ON DA CLOCK!”

F “It uh… looks nice, Uncle Moe.”

Moe “Anyways, youse all gonna be helpin’ wit da clean up, right?”

“I look at the absolute mess around us.”

“Fuck.”

>>Move To Convergence point

>>Fix the Cables

“Showtime”

“I take my eyes off the stage to get a read on the crowd.”

“Easily a good hundred people showed up to see VVURM DRAMA, better than any of us
expected.”

“The look on Fang’s face when everyone began filtering into the restaurant was
priceless.”

“They were on the last song of the night, the bizarrely long name of which I
missed.”

F “I JUST GOTTA ASK:”


“WHY IS HITLER”
“RIDING MY BIKE”
“PRETENDING TO BE”
“A MONKEY”

“Oh right… Reed definitely wrote this one.”

“The band really has improved, as opposed to booing and pointing at the audience is
listening intently.”
“And nobody has tripped so far.”

F “AT THREEEEEEE AAAAAAAA MMMMM”


“IN THE MORNIIIIIING!”
“ON A-”

“As if right on cue, half of the lights on stage cut out.”

“Trish strummed silently before giving a confused glance at the speakers.”

F “T-tuesday?”

“Fang fell out of tempo with Reed’s drums, stumbling over the end of the song.”

“It’s silent.”

“I began to clap, followed by several other patrons.”

“Including Stella who looked seconds away from being curb-stomped.”

“Rosa is on the other side of the room, too entranced by the music to care.”

“My eyes scan the room before noticing Trish, the sheer vehement rage radiating
from her visibly distorting the air around her.”

“Fuck.”

“My jaw aches as I picture myself in Stella’s place, courtesy of one pissed of
womanlet.”

“Before I have the chance to escape I hear my one saving grace.”

F “ANON!”

“Fang reaches me before Trish leaves the stage, extending her hand for a high-
five.”

F “We did it!”

T “No thanks to that asshole!”

“Oh no.”

F “What’s wrong?”
T “Skinnie sabotaged the show!”

T “I told him not to touch the wires and look what happened!”

A “I was only trying to help.”

“Trish holds up her hand to my face, waving the other around in grand gestures.”

T “You ruined the big finale! We missed our chance to make it big!”

T “Why is it that only my bass cut out anyways?!”

T “Are you actively trying to ruin us?!”

T “I told you Reed knew what he was doing!”

T “Do you not trust him and I?”

“Tears trickle down her sweat-glazed face.”

T “Is Fang really the only one here you care about?!”

T “We exist too, you know!”

“This hypocritical bitch!”

“The sharp words cut right through me.”

F “Jeez, Trish. The show went great! Our first good concert!”

F “The crowd actually clapped this time!”

T “No thanks to him.”

A “I didn’t do it on purpose.”

“Even though you deserved it.”

“Before she could interrogate me further, Fang grabbed Trish on the arm.”

F “Trish! Didn’t you say you wanted to set up our merch!”


“Trish winces, then gives a begrudging sigh, lowering her accusatory finger.”

T “Ugh, you aren’t worth it.”

“Trish storms off leaving Fang and I alone.”

“And Reed who was listening the entire time.”

Re “Anon, dude… you really should trust others, y’know?”

Re “It’s like they say… trust is the building block of our economy, or something.”

“What.”

Re “There are two kinds of people in this world, bro... people who believe and
people who trust.”

Re “And you believed in something false, your impulsiveness.”

“Before I can begin to comprehend Reed’s capitalist sermon, my ears are assaulted
by very Italian yelling.”

Moe “AY, KIDS!”

#moe now has vvurm drama apron

Moe “LOOKIT DIS ‘ERE AH-PRON YA LIL TRIGGA FRIEN SOL’ ME!”

“Reed looks almost jealous of Moe’s new garb.”

Re “Nice threads, compadre.”

??? “Hey! Someone took ma apron!”

Moe “GIT BACK TA WORK JERRY YER ON DA CLOCK!”

F “It uh… looks nice, Uncle Moe.”

Moe “Anyways, youse all gonna be helpin’ wit da clean up, right?”

“I look at the absolute mess around us.”


“Fuck.”

>>Move To Convergence point

>>Convergence Point

“An hour later and I’m stuck mopping up where the mosh pit once stood.”

“As my mop head gains a tinge of red I pray to god this isn’t from Stella.”

“Rosa wanted to stay and help clean buuut…”

{i}Ro “I am so sorry Stella! Come, I shall nurse you back at my home!”{/i}

“I’d feel more sorry for Stella but Rosa looked capable of helping her.”

“My god that’s a lot of… Marinara… Yeah…”

“Fang and Trish are trying to divide and carry out the stage.”

“...The mop really isn’t getting much from the floor.”

“Am I supposed to have a bucket or something?”

Re “Yooo, Anon!”

“Reed crosses right through the puddles, tracking grimy footprints without a care.”

Re “Hey man… what’d you think of the lyrics?”

A “What were you on when you wrote that?”

“Reed rubs his forehead, struggling to remember more than ten minutes ago.”

Re “I dunno man… the floor maybe? But I also distinctly remember floating…”

Re “Y’know, dude, we’ve been doing this since junior year, right?”

Re “And this is the first show that anyone’s actually liked.”


Re “Wild.”

A “You’ve only been playing together for a year?”

Re “You know it man, crazy how time flies.”

Re “Man, back then Trish had these crazy long horns and glasses.”

“Now there’s a thought. How would Trish even look with glasses?”

“Actually, how would glasses even work on any triceratops?”

Re “Fang wasn’t Fang.”

A “She- what?”

Re “Er… Probably shouldn’t have mentioned that…”

A “Fang wasn’t herself?”

Re “Honestly… That’s probably something to be left for Fang and Fang alone to talk
about… Sorry.”

A “Er… riiiiiight.”

Re “Only thing that stayed the same was like... me and my carfe, bro.”

“How long has he been on that stuff?”

Re “It was almost like a totally different time, man.”

“Before I even got a moment to picture what it might have been like not even a year
ago, Trish appears behind Reed.”

“She looks like she’s about to snap both our necks.”

T “Hey, Reed, what are you two talking about?”

Re “Just talking about some memories of the band, Trish.”


T “You didn’t tell him anything about me, did you?”

A “Glasses.”

T “Reed, you absolute ass.”

“Reed just shrugs.”

“By this point the restaurant has been mostly cleaned up with only a few tables
left to put back.”

T “So Anon, we showed you ours, now it’s your turn to show us yours.”

A “What, out here in public? Didn’t peg you for the kinky type.”

“Trish inhales sharply, visibly trying to master herself.”

T “I meant with your old school.”

A “That’s on a need to know basis, and you don’t need to know.”

F “Come on Anon, don’t you have any good memories from your old school?”

“Oh god no.”

A “I’d really rather not talk about it.”

F “Why not? You’ve told me about your parents.”

“That seems to catch Trish’s attention.”

“Shit. And that look of expectancy from Fang too?”

“I guess it can’t hurt.”

A “Well… I did try to get into music at one point.”

F “With how much you need my help in music class?”

A “I didn’t say I was good at it. I was just clicking buttons and seeing what
stuck.”

A “And spoiler alert, nothing did.”


“That got a giggle out of Fang and a look from Trish.”

T “By the way Anon, I saw you talking to that Stella girl before the concert. You
have something going on there?”

“I feel a pit in my stomach as a look of betrayal crosses Fang’s face.”

“Right into Trish’s trap, hook, line, sinker and rod.”

>>Nyet
>>Nein
>>Non
>>Nope
>>Inai
>>Mei yo
>>None of that
>>No.

A “I do NOT have a thing for Incontineisha.”

Re “Who?... Thought like, we were talkin’ bout whatsherface.”

T “The one with the Dino Duel cards.”

Re “...I thought those were Pocket Raptor cards.”

F “Weren’t they handegg cards?”

A “Uh… moving on...”

T “Anyone back home you had your eye on then?”

A “Nobody at Rock Bottom was worth the time.”

“Fang’s face softens, almost in a silent sigh of relief.”

“Is there hope for me yet?”

T “Rock Bottom, huh? I don’t think you’ve ever told us where you’re from before.”

“...”

“SHIT.”
A “O-oh, I haven’t? Huh.”

F “Who really cares where you went to last?”

Re “Yeah, man, it’s just a school.”

F “Was it in the sticks?”

A “Not exactly, it was certainly lower class though.”

A “I used to buy bulk soda and sell them to the stupid kids for lunch money.”

Re “Yooo, my man!”

“Reed gives me a fist bump.”

A “I’d usually just go places on a crappy dirt bike, leaving donuts in parking lots
when I was sure nobody was looking.”

F “Sounds like you were pretty cool at your last school.”

“HA.”

A “I dunno about that…”

Re “Sure, man… I don’t get why you left in the first place if you had it so good.”

“Oh no.”

A “Oh, uh, actually…”

“THINK OF SOMETHING THINK OF SOMETHING THINK OF SOMETHING”

A “I had to leave because of, uh…”

“DON’T SAY SOMETHING STUPID YOU ONLY GET ONE SHOT AT THIS.”

A “Family issues.”
“Nailed it.”

Re “Bummer man… glad you’re here instead.”

A “Yeah, yeah, thanks man.”

T “Sounds personal, guess we shouldn’t pry.”

T “We’re all friends here, after all.”

“Guess we are all friends at this point.”

“To varying degrees.”

“I let a content smile creep onto my face.”

Moe “AY YOU STUPID KIDS!”

“The tyrannosaur stomps over to us from the kitchen.”

Moe “Great job again on da show, punks.”

Moe “I knew my lil Lucy could pull dis shindig off.”

“He clamps one of his tiny hands down on Fang’s shoulder as she reflexively tries
to hide her face with a wing.”

Moe “Alas, I’m expecting a late night visita’, so I needs you punks to piss off.”

Moe “Come on by for a slice sometime, yeah?”

A “Thanks, Moe.”

Re “Yeah man… thanks a bunch…”

Moe “Now scram youse kids. I’ve got a different kinds a clean-up ta deal wit’.”

“Aaaaaaand repressing that.”

“...”
9. Study Session

“-A Few Weeks Later-”

“Things have cooled off since the concert back in February.”

“There’s no major events coming up, so the days have gotten longer.”

“The weather has started to warm up as well.”

“Each morning I’ve been walking through a thick blanket of fog that always
dissipates by lunchtime.”

“It’s a drastic shift compared to the hot/cold binary of fly-over life.”

“Maybe I should ditch the jacket soon…”

“No, there’s no way I’m showing the world just how much of a lanklet I am.”

“Even if it means being grilled alive.”

F “Geez, Anon, you look like you’re dying right now.”

A “The sun… can go… fuck itself…”

“Fang chuckles and pats my back as I lean over my desk.”

“On second thought, tank tops seem cool. Reed is usually wearing one.”

Mr. Jingo ”Alright class, the Principal’s got something to say, then you’ll be
leavin’ early.”

“With that we were all directed to the auditorium.”

“We didn’t have assigned seating, so I immediately thought of sitting with Fang.”

“Knowing better than to look through the ocean of students, I follow my nose to
Reed.”
“The fetid raptor was sitting in the very last row with Trish.”

Re “YOOOOO!”

“Reed’s bellow easily eclipses everyone else.”

“I wave back, hurrying past my awestruck classmates to claim my rightful throne.”

Re “‘Ey guys… saved ya some seats.”

“I take a glance over to see Trish pouting.”

T “Fuck, he found us.”

“The last students trickle in through the doors and take their seats.”

“Mr. Carldewskii takes the stage with an electronic mic.”

Carl “Alright, frickin’ settle down kids. We got a special frickin’ announcement
from the frickin’ principal.”

Carl “We got frickin’ midterms coming up soon, and he frickin’ feels the need to
give all of you a frickin’ pep talk.”

“The audience collectively groans.”

“Fang and Trish throw their heads back.”

“On cue, Principal Spears takes the stage.”

“Mr. Carldewskii holds the microphone out to him but gets ignored.”

“The student body covers their ears in preparation.”

Sp “ALRIGHT YOU LITTLE PUNKS.”

Sp “LIKE THE MAN SAID, WE HAVE MIDTERMS TO DEAL WITH IN JUST A FEW WEEKS.”

Sp “AND I DON’T WANT TO SEE ANY OF YOU SLACKING, ONLY THE BEST EFFORTS WILL BE
ALLOWED.”
Sp “THESE SCORES MAY NOT AFFECT YOUR OVERALL GRADE, SO MANY OF YOU MAY DECIDE TO
DISREGARD THEM.”

Sp “IT’S A WEAK MINDSET LIKE THAT THAT CAN AND WILL TRAP YOU!”

Sp “THESE TESTS ARE FOR YOU TO SEE IF YOU’RE ON THE RIGHT TRACK OR NOT!”

Sp “I EXPECT YOU ALL TO ACE THESE EXAMS BECAUSE VOLCANO HIGH IS THE BEST SCHOOL
THERE IS!”

Sp “AND I TEACH THE BEST STUDENTS THERE ARE, HERE AT VOLCANO HIGH!”

Sp “ARE THERE ANY QUESTIONS?”

“Judging by the dead silence, there wasn’t any.”

“The principal gives a single approving nod and exits stage right.”

Carl “Alright you kids, you’re free to frickin’ go.”

“With that the sea of students begins to funnel out of the auditorium.”

“The four of us wait until the auditorium is half empty before getting up and
making our way to the door.”

“Our motley crew make it to the front lawn of the school and Reed falls flat on his
back in the freshly mowed grass.”

Re “Later guys.”

“His breathing becomes a rumbling snore.”

T “So Fang, you actually gonna study?”

F “Mmmm…”

T “We can go to the library, there shouldn’t be anyone there.”

A “Eh, I don’t think I’m allowed there anymore. Wasted too much bandwidth.”

“Fuck using my own data to pirate all these games I’ll probably never play.”
T “I wasn’t asking you, douche.”

F “I kind of just wanna go home.”

T “...Kay… Talk to ya later Fang...”

F “Yeah… Later…”

T “Fuck you Anon.”

A “I didn’t even do anything this time!”

“Tch. Fuck her.”

A “Whatever. See you monday, Fang.”

“Before I can turn away Fang’s hand catches the sleeve of my unnecessary sweater.”

F “A-actually… I was thinking…”

A “Hmm?”

“Fang’s grip loosens on my arm, leaving her hand to rest on my forearm.”

F “Wanna like, study at my place? I uh… kinda need help… with science.”

A “Suuurrrreewaaait. Wouldn’t your dad make me into a hunting trophy?”

F “I don’t think you’re that good of a catch.”

“Ow. My ego.”

F “Besides, he’s working a late shift tonight and my mom should be out clothes
shopping or something. Again.”

“It’s okay Anon, you’re just going to Fang’s house.”

“Alone.”

“♪ Just the two of us. ♫”


“Bill Withers shut the fuck up holy fuck AAAAAAAA.”

A “Okay then. So how are we gonna get to your place?”

F “Shit! The bus! We can make it to the last one if we run!”

“OH GO FUCK YOURSELF BILL WITHERS.”

“We make a mad dash to the last bus.”

“I’m sweating like hell by the time we get there, made worse by the fact I’m still
wearing my jacket.”

“Still must not take off.”

“Must not expose skeleton arms.”

“After a little while of being simultaneously fried alive and bathed in sweat, we
finally make it to Fang’s place.”

“I obviously thank the bus driver again.”

“Wait. Alone with Fang? At her place?”

“Bill Withers begins to blare inside my head again god just fuck off FUCK.”

F “Come on, Anon. We can study in my room.”

“Fang’s room?”

“Oh, man, it’s been a while since I’ve noticed the alarms.”

A “S-sure! Lead the way.”

“Fang climbs the steps while I trail behind, weary of any hidden fathers laying in
wait to ambush me.”

“She holds a door open to a pitch-black room, and I tentatively step in.”

F “Aaaaah, home sweet home.”


“Fang flips on the lights and I’m not quite sure what I expected.”

“The black walls are covered with various band posters, the spaces in between
covered by what I assume are lyric ideas written in chalk.”

“A few guitar stands and a keyboard in the corner below a non-binary flag hanging
on the wall.”

“Fang throws her bag off to the side and picks up a guitar, strumming a few
chords.”

“I plant my hands in my pockets nonchalantly, looking around for a chair or


something.”

F “Just sit on the floor, dweeb.”

A “Wow, not even a beanbag chair?”

A “What kind of lazy teenager are you?”

F “The kind that has expendable guitars in arm’s reach.”

A “Fair enough.”

“I use my backpack as a makeshift backrest.”

A “What’s the guitar for, anyways?”

F “Playing music.”

A “I mean, aren’t we supposed to be studying?”

A “Or are we doing music first?”

F “Uhm… This is just how I get ready for studying.”

F “Strumming along puts me at ease.”

“Fang picks up a spare guitar pick from a shelf.”

“She begins playing a short riff that I recognize from one of VVURM DRAMA’s songs,
smiling and relaxing as she goes on.”
“Like my own personal concert.”

“When the song is finished, Fang gives an expectant glance my way.”

“I smile and give a tasteful nod.”

F “You wanna try?”

“Fang takes off the guitar strap and extends it for me to play.”

“I’m not sure what she expects me to do but I could give it a shot.”

“Though aren’t we supposed to be studying for midterms?”

Sp “THESE SCORES MAY NOT AFFECT YOUR OVERALL GRADE, SO MANY OF YOU MAY DECIDE TO
DISREGARD THEM.”

Sp “IT’S A WEAK MINDSET LIKE THAT THAT CAN AND WILL TRAP YOU!”

Sp “THESE TESTS ARE FOR YOU TO SEE IF YOU’RE ON THE RIGHT TRACK OR NOT!”

“...”

“Is it really alright to slack off?”

>>Play the Guitar


>>Get to Studying

>>Play the Guitar

“What the hell.”

A “Er… why not.”

“I take the guitar from her hands and put the strap on, letting its weight hang
from my shoulder.”

“Fang hands me the pick and I aimlessly strum the guitar, the mess of a noise
sounding a far cry from her elegant playing.”

“Well I tried.”

F “Here, like this.”


“Fang grabs another guitar and motions me to copy her hand movements.”

“I try to mimic her hands on the fretboard but it feels like my fingers are
twisting into pretzels.”

F “Not like that, your hand’s gonna get cramped as fuck like that.”

“Fang sets her guitar down on a stand and comes over to me.”

F “Holy fuck no wonder you sound like a horny cougar.”

A “Wait, like the cat or-”

F “Here, like this.”

“Her hand covers mine as she tries to readjust the position of it.”

F “No like- Gah stop fighting back!”

A “Ow hey- Quite tha- OW!”

F “Oh my fuck, Anon. Just relax your hand!”

“I would if I could but the god damned alarms weren’t freaking me out!”

F “UUUUUUUURG… Hold on.”

A “Wha-”

“Fang walks behind me.”

F “Don’t turn around!”

A “Why-”

“She’s standing right behind me!”

“She’s standing RIGHT THE FUCK BEHIND ME!”

“Her body presses against my back and her arms come around, each of her hands
taking my own and guiding them into proper position.”

“...”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

F “Anon, are you paying attention?”

A “Y-yeah! Totally!”

“I hope my voice didn’t just crack.”

“Fang’s hands move mine along the neck of the guitar.”

F “Alright, try these chords.”

“Her fingers press mine down, holding down the strings in an awkward position.”

F “Then this.”

“My hands are slid down closer to the base of the neck and too close to my crotch.”

F “And then finally this.”

“My fingers are shifted back up to the middle of the fretboard.”

F “Try that out, Anon.”

“Fang let’s go of my sweaty hands. She doesn’t move from behind me though.”

“I try and replicate the movements.”

“The first strum sounds… not bad…”

“The second note is horrendous. I blame my pants.”

“And the last chord comes out alrightish.”

F “Now do it all together.”


“I repeat the pattern and it comes out all sounding alrightish.”

F “Again.”

“Oh hey, that didn’t sound too bad now.”

F “You’re getting it now.”

A “Am I? I have no clue what these chords are?”

“I keep strumming, each time progressively sounding better and better.”

F “Now try playing chords of your own.”

A “My own..? I thought you were showing me how to play a song.”

F “I’m teaching you how to play guitar you dork.”

“I reposition my fingers and try something new, producing several more horrid
sounds from the instrument.”

“My pinky slides off the fretboard and when I strum again a strange look appears in
Fang’s eyes.”

>>

>Option 1 wrong
F “Pfft hahahaha, wow you suck at this.”

>Option 2 wrong
F “Wow that was really pretty.”

A “Really?”

F “Pretty shit.”

>Option 3 right
F “Hmm. Interesting, keep going.”

>>
>Option 4 wrong
F “You {i}really{/i} suck at this.”

>Option 5 wrong
F “C’mon Anon, you can do better.”

>Option 6 Right
F “That’s pretty good.”

F “Don’t stop you idiot, keep going.”

>>

>Option 7 wrong
F “Oh come on now, impress me.”

>Option 8 wrong
F “Nah… That’s not it, but you’re getting there.”

>Option 9 Right
F “I like this.”

F “Play that one again for me, will you?”

“I oblige, and repeat the notes several times.”

“Fang’s tail starts wagging along with my strumming, turning into her usual
metronome.”

F “...Wait...”

“She takes the guitar from me and sits on the edge of her bed, toying with the
chord I was strumming.”

F “I... I think I’ve figured that song out, Anon.”

“Her tail slaps a simple beat on her mattress as she slowly builds up a rhythm in
her strumming.”

“Her head bobs along, wings relaxing as the guitar’s tone starts picking up.”

“The song borne from the guitar was mesmerizing.”


“It started soft, with gentle tumbling trills, a slow jam at first, but eventually
it grew into something more.”

“The crescendo crossing the strings reshaped the music, the transformation into a
weightier rock piece was seamless.

“More than just fingers and a pick, it was as if Fang put her entire life’s effort
into this.”

“Thinking back, she must have made countless songs like this, most of them never
heard by anyone and left forgotten.”

“She soon started to hum with the song she was playing, harmony and melancholy
blending with the melody,”

“As Fang poured her very being into that instrument in her hands it dawned on me
what this was.”

“A lyricless ballad.”

“An instrumental aria.”

“Musical notes that bore the weight of words she couldn’t define.”

“All of which sounded beautiful, melding together into a harsh yet intoxicating
piece of dissonant serenity,”

“Eventually she started to diminuendo, the fading softness of strings and harshness
in her humming as she slowly laid the guitar to rest.”

“The music had stopped but her own emotions warred on.”

“Fang sat there, looking down at her guitar realizing she showed me something she
had never shown anyone before.”

“Fang bit back tears, fighting the sob that threatened to spill from her.”

“She sets her guitar down and slouches, rubbing her eyes and trying to repress her
inner turmoil.”

“Instinct pushes me to my feet, carrying me forward to the vulnerable girl sat on


plush duvets.”
“All that matters is her.”

“The part of me that felt scared at that thought, that wanted to remain isolated in
my comfort zone,”

“That wanted to pretend that no one else mattered,”

“That part was ejected. Forcibly.”

“Fang gasps as I wrap my arms around her.”

F “A-Anon-“

“The frailty of her voice makes my heart ache.”

A “The song was amazing, Fang.”

“It truly was. Because it was her. Her heart and soul were carried within it. Her
very being.”

“My heartfelt words reached her.”

“The dam burst.”

“She felt like a porcelain doll in my arms. Tears of sorrow and relief stain my
shirt and wet my chest.”

F “thank you...thank you...thank you...”

“Unlike the rooftop Fang’s voice was a weak mumble, broken by hiccups and uneasy
breaths.”

“My embrace is soft as I cradle her, soothing her with slow rocking.”

“We stayed like this, my arms calming the fragile and spent girl.”

“I have no clue how long it lasts, but Fang is able to compose herself with time.”

“I let her move away, choosing to sit next to her on the soft mattress.”

“Her eyes are puffy and red, and once again her make-up has left tracks of orange
and black on her cheeks.”

“And once again she shares with me that smile.”

“But this time I can tell exactly what that soft expression means.”

“Relief.”

F “God Anon, that’s twice now...”

A “My bad. How are you feeling?”

F “...I don’t know...”

“She looks down at the guitar she set aside.”

“I lean over her lap, carefully taking the instrument by its neck and bringing it
to my lap.”

A “Can you teach me?”

F “W-wha-“

A “The song. Can you teach it to me?”

“She looks at the guitar and then me. Her surprise slowly turns to happiness.”

F “Sure I can. Hold up a second.”

“She stands from the bed and goes for another one of her guitars.”

“Along the way she grabs a shirt off the floor, using it to wipe her face.”

“When she comes back Fang sits closer than before, our shoulders together.”

F “So, for the opener-“

“After what feels like hours of back-and-forth to learn guitar, my arms feel like
they’re about to fall off.”

“Fang is an unexpectedly patient music teacher.”


“She ends up correcting the same mistakes I make over and over with little more
than ‘dweeb’.”

“I ended up calling it quits halfway through the twentieth practice song.”

“By that point my acoustic screeching turned into something that resembles actual
music.”

F “You’re no StegoSlash, buuuuut... not half bad for one lesson.”

A “I’ll take it. I fuckin’ suck creatively.”

F “Do you? You made that railgun way back when.”

A “Ah, that, that was just something I read online.”

F “Still managed to make it.”

A “Yeah but that had like, instructions and shit.”

A “Anything that needs imagination and it’s like I’m an epileptic with downs
syndrome.”

F “Pffft. What about your word play?”

“...Not telling her about my shitposting needs…”

A “That’s the best I can do I guess.”

F “Hmmm…”

“Fang’s fingers trace along the strings of her waiting guitar.”

F “How bout a jam session?”

A “J-jam session?”

“Not that kinda jam session. Fuck.”

“Quick change of topic before the mental images start forming.”


A “So what’s the whole pirate princess thing about?”

“She doesn’t have a candle so I’ll be fine.”

“A guitar pick bounces off my eye.”

A “Gah!”

F “I told you not to mention that!”

A “I know, I know, sorry, geez!”

A “But, really though. What was the deal with that?”

F “... It’s just… Something that I did sometimes.”

A “What, play pretend? All kids do that.”

F “Yeah, but I mean, this was a bit different.”

F “When I pretended the world seemed so much better.”

F “So I’d end up doing it for months at a time.”

F “Years, even.”

A “But that’s all over now?”

F “Yeah.”

F “Just embarrassing memories.”

F “Sometimes I do miss it, though.”

F “Being someone new, trying to figure everything out again…”

{i}Re “Fang wasn’t Fang.”{/i}


“Hmmm…”

F “Anyways, go ahead and just try playing.”

“She reaches over and plucks a string on the guitar I'm holding.”

A “Just whatever comes to mind?”

F “Yeah. Just try and play whatever.”

“And then… All hell broke loose.”

FangDad “What the HELL are you doing here, Anon?”

“Yep, that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I got in this situation.”

“Well you see, it all started with me here, in the girl I like’s room. ”

“I was learning to play guitar, maybe even getting a little good at it!”

“Then right out of nowhere, nowhere I tell you…”

“The scariest motherfucker I have ever seen in my life shows up.”

“Yep, you guessed it, it’s the lady’s dad. No warning or anything!”

“And he brought his murder weapon.”

“My life flashes before my life and my first thought is: god my life sucks.”

“The Fang bits were pretty cool I guess.”

“I at least hope someone deleted my browser history.”

“Anyways, back to the show.”

FangDad “Out. Now.”

“It takes all my strength to prevent my bladder from doing its best Stella
impression right about now.”

“I silently head to the door with Judge Dredd to my back, catching a sympathetic
glance from Fang on the way out.”
“Walking out the front door, I feel my heart stop as his talon-like nails begin to
dig into my shoulder.”

“At that moment I learned a very important lesson.”

“PTERO-CLAWS HURT LIKE CRAP, MAN.”

FangDad “The next time I catch you alone with my daughter, I will use your head as
a rubix cube.”

“He gives me a shove off the porch and I hear the door slam behind me.”

“I can hear her father’s raised voice from here.”

“Sheesh… guy needs like… all the chill pills…”

“Or maybe some Carfe…”

“God dammit Reed.”

“I turn away from the luxurious home and walk down the pathway to the sidewalk.”

“Shit. And things were getting…”

“Getting…”

“Argh, I dunno.”

“But like, after Fang’s song she was…”

“Fucking hell, why are emotions so fucking difficult.”

“As I wait at the bus stop I decide to break down everything that happened.”

“We didn’t study at all.”

“Well, maybe music I guess. Raptor Jesus, Mr. Jingo is a shit teacher compared to
her.”

“But really, all I can think about is how she was after that song.”
“I saw something… something…”

“How do I fucking contextualize it.”

“In the moment I thought I knew.”

“Holding her in my arms…”

*Bzzz bzzz*

“A text? Shit, that’s rare.”

“Fang: Hey”

“Fang: About earlier”

“Fang: Thanks”

“Fang: For like hanging out”

“Fang: And sorry about dad”

“There was a pause, the animated ellipsis showing Fang was writing something
longer.”

“Fang: About that song. I wanna work on some lyrics for it.”

“Fang: So like how about we hang out again and write some?”

“I consider my response thoroughly.”

“Anon: Sure”

“Another session like that?”

“I think of Fang, standing behind me, guiding my hands again.”

“My cheeks warm as I recall the feeling of her hands over mine.”
“Fuck… I wonder… how does she feel about me?”

“I mean, she’s shown me so much of her now.”

“And all the cheek nuzzling.”

“Just like Naser and Naomi.”

“Maybe?”

“...”

“-Two weeks later-”

“I’m looking over my final grades for this semester.”

“My science score is barely passing.”

“I want to say it’s because of Fang and mine’s ‘study sessions’.”

“Every time we would try to study it would always become jam sessions or lyric
writing.”

“But I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Spending more and more time with her was fun.”

“And seeing this side of her.”

“It makes me feel so lightheaded, like I’m floating on clouds.”

“Although the sheet-rope escapes from Fang’s dad were starting to leave serious
rugburns on my palms.”

“As a bonus, I aced Music class.”

“The midterm was a demonstration.”

“And the fact I was able to play guitar, even shittily, was enough.”
>>Following only available if on perfect score run

“Fang seemed proud of the fact that I was able to play well enough to get a passing
grade.”

“Or rather proud of herself that she was that good of a music teacher.”

“Her way of ‘congratulating’ me was to hip-check me right into my locker, only to


apologize while laughing her ass off.”

“Actually, the whole ordeal made me remember I had this old music program installed
on my computer.”

“It’s incredibly outdated, but free is free.”

“Several hours of decade old tutorials later I finally start cobbling together a
loosely musical sounding rhythm.”

“I couldn’t find a reverb option, so I just overlaid the same instruments with a
lower volume where I wanted it.”

“People probably won’t notice.”

“I’m starting to get why Fang likes doing this sort of thing.”

“It’s sorta like just the act of creating something and being able to say ‘I made
this’.”

“Exporting the file and uploading it to a music site, I await my audience to start
amassing before me.”

“See, I already have a comment!”

“{i}Never make anything again. Ever.{/i}”

“Ah, just a day in the life of an underappreciated artist.”

“...”

>>Move to Part 8
>>Get to Studying

“No, I should focus more on my midterms.”

A “I’d rather get started with studying, actually.”

“Fang lowers her arm with the guitar in rejection.”

A “Cmon, Fang. You know I can’t afford to waste my time here with all the money my
family’s spent already.”

F “Yeah, yeah. You only got this one shot and all.”

F “Ffffffffffiiiiine. What’re we doing first?”

A “Ehh, why not science first since that’s your hardest subject.”

F “Ugh. Got a textbook?”

A “What happened to yours?”

F “Tried throwing it at Naser and it flew over the cliff.”

A “H-how? Why?”

F “I dunno, felt like it.”

F “You got a textbook or not?”

A “Yeah…”

“I retrieve the tome from my backpack, science is easily the heaviest thing in
there.”

A “So, what? We take turns reading it?”

F “Too slow. Let’s just huddle and read it together.”

A “Why not just switch it back and forth?"


F “Don’t feel like it. We reading or not?”

“Fang sits beside me on the ground, Her oversized beak obscuring a good portion of
the side of the page in my peripheral vision.”

“I can feel the prickle of her feathers barely brushing against my back.”

F “We’re on chapter sixteen, right?”

A “Eighteen. Are you even paying attention during class?”

F “What do you think I hang out with you for?”

“We read about electric currents in silence for a few minutes.”

“How do I know when she’s done so I can turn the page?”

“...”

A “...”

F “...”

A “You done?”

F “Oh, I wasn’t reading it.”

A “Argh, fuck you.”

F “Ha, you wish.”

“Don’treadintothat.”

A “If I read the first page out loud, would you read the second?”

F “Sure, sure.”

“Fang leans back onto the floor, hands behind her head.”

F “Get started already.”


A “Ugh.”

“In conductors, electrons are free to move around and flow easily. This is not true
for insulators, in which the-”

F “*SNNNRRRRRRRRRK*”

A “...Electrons are more tightly bound to the nuclei (which we'll discuss next).
When current is applied, electrons move-”

F “*SNNNRRRRRRRRRK*”

A “Dammit Fang, I’m trying to read to you here, cut that out.”

F “*SNNNRRRRRRRRRK*”

“She really did pass out!”

“Hmm…”

A “Fang, seriously, get up or I’ll poke you.”

F “*SNNNRRRRRRRRRK* mmmrrrrfooouurmooooreminuuuutes.”

A “Don’t think I won’t Fang! These guns are cocked and loaded!”

F “*SNNNRRRRRRRRRK*”

“Target locked.”

“Weapons hot!”

“Battery 1!”

F “AAAAAAAAGH! THE FUCK?!”

A “Quit falling asleep during class.”

F “It’s my room, I’ll do what I want.”


A “Come on, I’m trying to take this ser-”

FangMom: “I’M HOOOOOOME!”

F “Oh no.”

FangMom: “Luuuuucy? Naaaaser? Are you here?”

FangMom: “I got your favorite, dino nuggies!”

F “Those're for Naser.”

A “Suuure.”

FangMom “Helloooo? Anyone home?”

“I hear footsteps getting progressively closer as Fang’s mother searches for any
sign of life in the house.”

“A door down the hall opens.”

FangMom “Sweeeetie? Naseeeer? Oh, I guess he must be bowling with Moe again.”

F “Anon, you need to leave now.”

FangMom “Lucy, are your headphones in again?”

F “I’ll open the window, just jump!”

A “This is the second floor!”

F “Broken bones are better than-”

FangMom “OH Lucy, there you are! I didn’t realize your boyfriend was over to
visit!”

“WHAT.”

“Fang’s hands cover her bright red face.”


“I wasn’t aware their beaks got red too.”

F “Moooooooom! He’s not- what did I say about knocking!”

FangMom “That you and lil’ Nassie need to knock on our door at night when it’s your
parent’s ‘special’ time.”

F “Not what YOU said!”

FangMom “Oh, sweetie, that’s no way to talk to your mother. Especially in front of
a guest.”

“The tiny Ptero turns to me with an apologetic smile.”

FangMom “Since you’re here, why don’t you stay for dinner?”

“Something tells me Fang’s dad would make me the dinner.”

“Beef Strog-Anon does not sound palatable to me.”

F “Actually he was just leaving. Now.”

FangMom “Oh but I wanted to show him your baby pictures!”

F “Right now in fact! He’s gonna miss his bus!”

FangMom “I have one with me right now!”

“She reaches elbow-deep into her purse and pulls out a small flipbook.”

FangMom “Oh Lucy, this is my FAVORITE little picture of you and Naser!”

“She shoves the photo in my face that I immediately make out as a bathtub with an
infant Fang and Naser playing in the water.”

“Well it IS kinda cute…”

“Before I can open my mouth, Fang jabs me in the ribs.”

F “Oh my god mom, he doesn’t have time for this!”

“Fang pulls me off the ground and begins to push me towards the door.”
FangMom “Well I hope you enjoyed spending time with my little tooth fairy, Anon!”

FangMom “You’re welcome back ANY time you’d like!”

“I manage a weak wave as Fang continues to rush me towards the door in


embarrassment.”

“We reach the front door and she quickly turns back inside.”

F “OkaybyeseeyouatschoolAnon.”

“I hear the door slam behind me and am left alone on the porch.”

“Well that was… interesting.”

“Guess I’ll go wait at the bus stop.”

“Does Fang’s mom really think I’m her boyfriend?”

“I know we spend a lot of time together…”

“Fang seemed REALLY quick to deny that though.”

“Does it mean anything?”

*Bzzz bzzz*

“A text? Shit, that’s rare.”

“Fang: Hey”

“Fang: About earlier”

“Fang: Sorry about mom”

“Fang: Just ignore anything she says”

“Fang: Also don’t tell anyone what you saw”

“Fang: ANYONE”

“Anon: ten bucks”

“Fang: I have my dad on speed dial”


“Anon: five bucks”

“Anon: lol jk”

“Fang: gobble a knob”

“Anon: see you monday.”

“Fang: see ya”

“The bus hasn’t gotten here yet.”

StreetVendor “Yo, you’re that kid with the date from before, ain'tcha?”

A “Huh?”

“I flip around to see the street vendor from a few weeks ago.”

A “You remember me?”

StreetVendor “Kid, I’ve been working this corner for the better part of two years
now.”

StreetVendor “I know how to tell faces apart.”

StreetVendor “Plus, this ain’t exactly the skinnie part of town, y;know?”

A “I guess…”

StreetVendor “You just get back from another date?”

A “What? No, it was a study session- Why am I telling you this?”

StreetVendor “Yeah, a ‘study’ session.”

Street Vendor “I get ya.”

A “No, it really was just studying.”


A “Fang tried to get me to play the guitar, but I made sure to keep on track.”

StreetVendor “You WHAT.”

A “Hm?”

StreetVendor “Men… She was coming onto you, dummy!”

“Oooooooohh.”

“Fuck.”

A “...Oh.”

StreetVendor “Still, point stands.”

A “What’s that?”

StreetVendor “I was right! HA!”

StreetVendor “By the way, that wasn’t your ride, was it?”

“I look back to see the tail end of the city bus rounding the corner onto the next
street.”

StreetVendor “Next one comes in forty-five minutes.”

A “...Shut up and gimme a Danger Dog.”

StreetVendor “Well, someone knows their franks.”

StreetVendor “Comin’ right up.”

“...”

“-Two weeks later-”

“I’m looking over my final grades for this semester.”

“My science score is lower than normal.”


“I couldn’t study with Fang anymore since the Mother Incident.”

“She doesn’t want me to be seen by her anymore.”

“Instead, I’ve been studying at home.”

“Got a pretty great grasp on the core subjects, too.”

“In the end, Mr Jingo screwed us over by making music midterm a live
demonstration.”

“Horrid marks there. But I did get things pretty great with math and english.”

“My gpa was secured at least for whatever the fuck I decide on.”

“...”

>>Move to Part 8

10. VVURM DRAMA

“End of midterms means the start of the new quarter.”

“Halfway through the semester, and things have been going pretty good.”

“I didn’t completely fuck up so far, and I think the rest of the band is starting
to warm up to me.”

“Especially Fang.”

“In fact we’ve been hanging out more in the auditorium after school.”

“Instead of band practice we’ve been making use of that repaired projector.”

“Watching shitty movies and playing games on Reed’s Xrox.”


N “Why are you so deep in thought, Anon?”

“The Mandarin Manchurian rips me away from my monologue.”

“During homeroom, Spears came on the announcement to declare an assembly for the
senior class.”

“Or in his own words,”

Sp “ASSES IN THOSE SEATS NOW!”

“Naomi has taken the opportunity to walk with me through the hallways.”

A “What do you want?”

N “So I heard you and Fang went on another date the other day.”

“Of course she did.”

A “It wasn’t a date, we were just hanging out.”

“Just kickin’ Reed’s ass in Rock Ring 3.”

“Pls give mammoth bone armor.”

A “You do anything fun with Naser lately?”

N “OH! My Naser just had another track meet!”

“That always works.”

N “His high jump form is so perfect!”

N “And he looks so dazzling in his track and field uniform!”

N “...And his physique…”

“I tune her out as she covers her profusely red nose.”

“The less I can think of Naser’s body the better.”

“We get to the auditorium once again and I look to the back row to find our spot.”

“Empty?”

F “OVER HERE, ANON!!”


“Fang and Trish are sitting in the front row.”

“Next to them is Reed huddling behind a cart with the projector he’d fixed on it,
messing with the cords.”

A “What’s the deal? Why are we sitting in the front all of a sudden?”

Re “Uhhhh… Spears asked me to man the projector…”

Re “First I was like ‘say whaaaaat’, but then I was like ‘yeah, man, sure’.”

Re “So here I am.”

A “I.. see...”

“I take my seat next to Fang.”

A “They say why we’re here yet?”

F “Nope.”

T “Since we’re seniors it’s probably some other stupid pep talk about ‘Our
Futures’.”

Re “I bet it’s a fundraiser…”

Re “I’m like, good at selling things and stuff...”

A “I’m sure.”

A “Actually, I’ve been meaning to ask.”

A “What exactly is ‘carfe’?”

Re “You don’t know man?”

Re “Carfentanyl. The wildest stuff a dino can get.”

A “Really now?”
T “It was used in war by skinnies a while back. It’s a deadly tranquilizing agent.”

Re “It’s only deadly when you make it wrong, man.”

Re “But yeah, it’s great stuff if you know how to do it.”

A “Fang, have you ever tried any?”

F “Once.”

F “Woke up hanging upside down from a tree with Naomi’s clothes on hugging a fake
skeleton.”

T “See, when I do it it just makes me a bit dizzy for a few hours.”

A “Huh. Can I see some?”

Re “Absolutely not.”

F “No.”

A “Why not?”

T “That stuff’s a hundred times more powerful than horse tranquilizer.”

T “It’d melt your skin.”

Re “Make your heart burst.”

F “I heard a human tried it once and exploded.”

T “I bet.”

A “Yeah, yeah, sure. You just don’t want to share.”

“The last of the seniors trickle in and take seats near the front.”

“Eventually Spears takes the stage.”


“He pauses to make sure everyone’s covering their ears before beginning.”

Sp “ALLLRIGHT!”

Sp “AS YOU ALL KNOW, GRADUATION’S COMING UP SOON.”

Sp “WE’RE GOING TO GO OVER THAT WHOLE PROCESS,”

Sp “BUT FIRST THE STUDENT COUNCIL HAS A BRIEF PRESENTATION TO GIVE ON THE SUBJECT.”

Sp “FLOOR’S ALL YOURS, STUCO.”

“Spears gestures his hand towards Naomi and Naser, who show up from behind the
stage curtains.”

“The Chiffon Czarina brings a wireless microphone to her snout.”

“She begins reciting a well rehearsed speech in her usual snooty (heh) manner.”

“More plastic than person.”

N “Why, thank you, Principal Spears!”

“The projector comes to life, displaying a basic slideshow title card reading ‘A
New Era of Your Life’.”

A “Reed, how do you know when to move it forward?”

Re “It’s when she crosses her fingers. Check it out.”

N “Now, this is a very important turning point in your life!”

“Ah, got it, It’s one of these. I needed a nap.”

“As soon as I closed my eyes I felt a malevolent force looming before me.”

“Somehow, I felt like opening my eyes was a bad idea.”

“But keeping them closed was an even worse one.”


“At least there’s cute little designs on the slides.”

“There’s a little penguin with a graduation cap…”

“There’s the school mascot in a party hat… even has the fogged up window...”

“A lineup of various graduates with a token human at the end for diversity.
Typical.”

“There’s some scientists and engineers holding hands…”

“There’s a triceratops holding onto a branch with the text ‘hang in there, baby!’
(Brazilian version is Pool’s Closed but trigga’d)

(Brazilian version has humans engineer the meteor crash in order to claim global
supremacy)

“There’s me two years ago when I photoshopped myself kissing an anime girl.”

“...”

“...”

“...”

“What the fuck”

“HOW!”

“WHY!”

“The world’s stopped turning. No one around me is moving and there is no sound at
all.”

“Why is that here? How! I deleted everything! EVERYTHING!”

“So why the fuck is it here.”

“My body feels like stone as I try to turn.”


“To see if anyone else is seeing this.”

“In the end I can’t bring myself to move at all.”

“It doesn’t matter, I already feel their endless gazes.”

“I feel lightheaded.”

“There’s what feels like a lump of lead in the pit of my stomach.”

“There’s dark spots forming in my sight.”

“When I finally breathe again the world restarts.”

“The laughter hits first.”

“A monstrous guffaw from behind, that’s joined by every other senior in the room.”

Nas “REED CHANGE THE SLIDE, CHANGE IT NOW!”

Re “I-I am!”

“More pictures. So many more pictures.”

“Each one more and more embarrassing than the last.”

“I… oh god…”

Nas “Shit!”

“There’s a loud crash right next to me and the entire room becomes black.”

“Did I faint?”

“Is this real life? Is this just fantasy?”

F “A-anon?”

“Still awake. Fuck.”


“The lights come back on and my eyes burn.”

“The projector is on the floor, lens shards scattered all over the floor.”

“The laughter is even louder now.”

Nas “Reed how the fuck did this happen?”

Re “L-look I just used the usb Trish said-”

Nas “TRISH?! Why would Trish-”

“Trish… wasn’t in her seat.”

“In the corner of my eye I notice someone running for the entrance.”

“It’s Trish. She’s making a mad sprint for the door.”

Nas “Stop her!”

“She continues dashing towards the exit…”

“And right into Spears’ hand.”

“Literally.”

“His baseball mitt of a hand covers the… the… that fucking BITCH!”

“Covers her face entirely.”

“Even lifts her up. By her face. With one hand.”

Sp “You’re coming with me, young lady. --We’re going for a ride.”

--“Omae wa mo… shindeiru.”

--The next day, Trish’s car in the parking lot has a Trish-shaped indentation on
the bonnet.
Sp “ALL OF YOU GET YOUR ASSES BACK TO CLASS.”

“Spears motions for me to follow him but I feel paralyzed by everything that just
happened.”

“I bury my face in my hands and just groan.”

“This is Rock Bottom all over again.”

“ Fang tugs at my arm, trying to get me to follow.”

“I just can’t find the energy to move anything right now.”

“Fang frantically looks around at the hysterical crowd, trying to come up with
something.”

“Eventually, I feel Fang put her arm over my shoulder as she tries to get me to
stand.”

“She drapes her wings across my back, creating a barrier between me and everyone
else.”

“Without saying a word she leads me out of a side door towards the principal’s
office.”

“What the fuck just happened?”

F “Hey…”

“How is this happening to me?”

F “...You gonna be alright?”

“How did Trish find those dumb pictures?”

F “Look, don’t listen to those pricks Anon.”

“Was Reed in on it?”

F “All of them dumbasses.”

“He couldn’t be, what would he gain from something like this?”

F “Like… This’ll all blow over.”

“What would Trish gain from something like this?

F “Like, none of them talk about our shitty concert.”


“I know she doesn’t like me but this…”

F “And that was like, a fuckin’ month ago.”

“...This is fucked up!”

“I’m going to rip her stupid horns off and give her a couple new holes to breathe
with!”

F “It’ll be all good Anon.”

“Think Fang’s dad had a thing going on with the golf clubs…”

“See if he can give me a couple of pointers.”

F “Just needs some time to forget it happened.”

"The squeak of sneakers catches my attention and I turn to see Reed approaching us
down the hall."

F "Reed...? I thought Spears sent everyone back to class."

Re "Can't just sit in class while all my hombres are going through some pretty
heavy stuff, y'know?"

Re "Got something I need to get off my chest, anyways."

A "What? Bit busy dealing with being doxxed here!"

“Wait...”

A “Wait, get what off your chest?”

A “Were… were you in on it?”

“Fang’s questioning glare makes Reed shudder.”

Re “Wait, wait, no, don’t get the wrong idea, man!”

F “Reed… How did this happen?”

Re “No no, it went more like…”


Re “I was getting the projector set up earlier, right?”

Re “Something was wrong with the lens, and I didn’t have enough time.”

Re “...So I asked Trish to go get the thing from Naomi.”

Re “I guess she must’ve, like… changed the slides before giving it to me?”

A “And you didn’t think to check?!”

“Reed deflates.”

A “...Damn it, Reed…”

Re "Look, man... Trish isn't a bad person."

A "Bitch sure has a funny way of showing it!"

Re "Dude. I know you're still hurting from what she did but like-"

A "Yeah, what could have POSSIBLY given that away?!"

Re "BRO! Let me finish!"

"Reed's raised voice takes the wind out of my lungs."

"That's the first time I think I've ever heard him raise his voice."

Re "Trish messed up pretty bad, bro. Like massively, hugely messed up."

Re "Not gonna argue with that. She abused my trust too, dude."

Re "When she gave me the presentation from Naomi I didn’t think she’d do anything
like that.”

Re “But did you ever consider why?"

A "...Because she's a two-bit cunt?"

"Reed sighs again, with a noticeable lack of smoke surrounding him."


Re "Dude... You and Trish have always been at each others' throats. But like, why
even?"

"I open my mouth to answer but can't find the words."

"Or the reason?"

Re "Did'ja ever stop to consider WHY Trish always gave you a hard time?"

A "...Not really..."

"Another sigh, this time with an expectant look from Reed."

Re "Did you ever even try, bro?"

A "..."

A "...No."

Re "And that's the problem, dude.”

“Reed has a pained expression on his face, and a quick glance shows Fang’s is even
worse.”

Re “Like, I know it sucks. Trish tricked me and all too, and that hurts, y’know?”

Re “But maybe try and think why Trish did this, alright bro?”

>>“Not exactly in the introspective sort of mood right about now.


>>“I refuse to accept that I had any part to play in this debacle other than being
the victim.
>>“I guess Reed might have a point…”

>>Regardless of selection made

“Trish can still burn in hell --Detroit for all I care.”

Sp “Three MONTHS!”

Sp “THREE MONTHS from graduation and you PULL A STUNT LIKE THIS?!”

“Spears’ stern voice grilling Trish in his office rips me from my thoughts.”
“Good! She deserves it!”

Sp “I’ve half a mind to have campus security escort you out of here and send you to
Reef City Continuation!”

“Fang and Reed both hiss at that.”

“What the fuck does that mean?”

Sp “You have five minutes to explain why I shouldn’t do that right now.”

“I couldn’t hear Trish’s full response through the door but she was obviously
crying.”

“After what SHE did?”

“Fang leans in, trying to listen through the door to hear what the bitch was
saying.”

“Because of her arms I was pulled closer too.”

“I heard the trollop’s whimpering and wanted nothing more than to really make her
cry.”

T “-all HIS fault-”

“My fault?! I did fucking nothing to that purple pole-smoker.”

T “-didn’t know what else I could do-”

“Not fucking show half the school the cringiest thing I’ve ever done and commit
what amounts to character assassination?!”

T “-some asshole from the sticks-”

“I’ll show that cunt some fucking sticks.”

T “-driving Fang away!”

“...What.”

“What does Fang have to do with any of this?!”

“She wasn’t the one bitching about every damn thing I do!”
“I glance over to Fang whose expression seems even worse now.”

F “...”

“Looking at her this way makes a part of me feel even shittier.”

“Like I did cause this.”

“Fuck Trish though, she’s been an ass to me from the beginning!”

Sp “Anon! Will you please step into my office!”

“Spears’ voice shocks me from my eavesdropping.”

“What am I supposed to say to Trish?”

“Fang tries to give a reassuring smile but it’s so fragile.”

“Like this is all her fault and not that backstabbing bitch.”

“Reed gives a silent nod. No thumbs up this time.”

“I enter Spears’ office and my eyes are immediately drawn to Trish sitting in front
of his desk surrounded by crumpled up tissues.”

Sp “Trish, is there anything you would like to tell Anon?”

“I’ve never seen her like this.”

T “It’s all your fault.”

T “Who are you to come here and take Fang away!”

T “You’re just some nobody from the middle of nowhere who only cares about
yourself!”

T “I helped pull Fang out of their shell”

“And made her a social pariah in the process.”

T “My band was doing great before you came here!”

“I set up the only successful show you ever played.”

T “And then you show up and start manipulating everyone!”

T “Because you’re a selfish control freak!”

T “Everything has to revolve around you!”


--“Oh, Venerable Pot, allow me to introduce Lady Kettle. Lady Kettle, this is
Venerable Pot. I think the two of you will get on like a house on fire!”

T “Fang and Reed and me were going to make it to the top!”

T “But you stole everything from me because you didn’t understand us!”

T “No one understands us!”

“Trish is cut off by a horrid sob, her head falling into her hands and new tears
spilling from her eyes.”

“Raptor Jesus on his cross of rock that’s a lot to unpack.”

“It’s like you didn’t even try to understand me either.”

Sp “Anon, is there anything you want to add?”

“Like how she’s not worth the oxygen?”

“But if this really is all about Fang…”

>>Talk with Trish

“I turn to the pitiable purple punk-rocker.”

Sp “You are not the only person in the world.”

“Maybe Reed was onto something.”

“I… Think I finally get it…”

A “Look, Trish. Maybe we didn’t start off right. And yeah, I can be an asshole.”

“She looks up at me, surprise written on her absurdly moist face.”

A “I didn’t mean to drive you and Fang apart or anything. I just want to be Fang’s
friend.”

A “But after what you fucking did. Fucking digging up my past? Airing it to every
senior?”

A “And all for Fang? She’s outside the door thinking this is all her fault!”
“That got a response from Trish.”

“Her head dipped down and her fingers curled into the hem of her hoodie.”

A “Maybe it’s your fault for being such a bitch.”

A “Maybe it’s mine. I don’t know.”

A “But it sure as shit isn’t Fang’s!”

“Another choked sob racked her body and the tears started anew.”

A “...I’m sorry for being a poor friend to you. But after what you did? I don’t
know if I can forgive that.”

“Spears nods in approval, a fatherly grin stretching his cheeks.”

Sp “That was well said, son. You’ve come a long way since your first day.”

Sp “You can leave. Take the rest of the day if you need it.”

“I rise from my chair and make for the door.”

“But I’m stopped by what Trish just muttered.”

T “s’my fault… m’sorry.”

“...”

A “You should tell that to Fang.”

>>Move to Convergence A

>>Ignore Trish

A “No, I’ve got nothing.”

“Spears sighs like he expected me to add something more.”

“What was I supposed to say?”


“Forgive her and act like nothing happened?”

Sp “Well, Anon, I can’t really say I blame you after all of that.”

“Trish remains silent, her eyes locked on the floor.”

Sp “You can go home for the day if you need to.”

>>Convergence A

“Right before I clamp my hand on the doorknob, Spears speaks up.”

Sp “Oh, and Anon. Don’t think I didn’t notice.”

“Uh oh.”

“I slowly turn back to him.”

Sp “...”

A “...”

Sp “Your waifu is trash and your taste is shit.”

Sp “My door is always open so I can share some quality anime.”

“What.”

“I open the door to see Fang again, expression complex, leaning against the door’s
frame.”

“Reed has taken my place beside her with a comforting arm around her shoulder.”

“If this was any other situation I might have felt a bit jealous.”

F “Hey.”

“A heavy sigh escapes my lips.”

A “Hey.”
Re “Doing okay, bro?”

A “I’d frankly like to just disappear right now.”

A “...I think I’ll just go home.”

F “I uh... can ditch. If you need me to come with.”

“Fang looks at the door to Spear’s room for a bit, then back to me.”

“Trish is probably having to call her parents right now.”

“Fang probably heard everything in the office.”

>>Choice 2, only if point gained from choice 1


>>Wait for Trish to exit the office

A “You worried about her, too?”

“Fang turns her head down to her shoes.”

F “...”

F “How could I not tell something like this was happening?”

A “You know it’s not your fault.”

F “Doesn’t mean I don’t feel guilty about it.”

“She picks her head up to look me in the eye.”

F “We should leave... you probably don’t want to see her when she gets out.”

A “Actually, I think we should wait. Looks like you have something to say to her.”

F “Well, yeah, but…”

A “There’s something else I wanted to tell her, too.”


F “There is?”

Re “There is?”

F “You sure you should be talking to her when you’re still this upset?”

A “It’s nothing bad, promise.”

Re “It’s a good call, dude.”

F “Mmmmm…”

A “You can go first.”

“Fang gives a small nod, and the three of us slide down the wall into sitting
positions.”

“The minutes pass.”

F “What do I even say to her…?”

A “...”

“I’m not entirely sure either.”

“Reed awkwardly toys with his tail in silence, suddenly a lot less contemplative
than before.”

“The clasped hands around my knees start to leave red marks on each other.”

“I can’t find the energy to shift them.”

“Aeons later, Trish emerges from the office.”

“Her tears have become shiny trails reflecting the sterile light of the hallway.”

“Hesitantly, Fang gets up to speak with her.”

“That makes one of us.”


“For a while, the two just stare at each other.”

“Eventually…”

F “...Why?”

F “Why the fuck did you do this to Anon?”

F “Do you actually think I’d be okay with this?”

F “Anon is just as much my friend as you or Reed!”

F “That was something those douchebags who make fun of our band would do.”

T “...I thought he was a bad influence...”

T “...On you… the band…”

T “Everything is changing, Fang, and I don’t like it.”

T “All because of Anon.”

F “Then why didn’t you just fucking talk to us?”

F “Anon isn’t some asshole trying to rip everything apart.”

T “I know what you told me, Fang, but like…

T “But you deserve better, he’s not-”

“I catch Trish throwing a glance my way as she cuts herself off.”

T “Look, I’m sorry Fang. I'm just trying to look out for you.”

F “Look out for me? I can make my own decisions, Trish.”

“Fang sighs and rubs her temples.”

F “...I’m taking a break from the band.”

“I watch as Trish’s entire world shatters before her eyes.”

“Reed’s lack of reaction tells me they discussed this while I was in Spears’
office.”

T “W-what?”
F “I need time to think…”

T “Fang wait-”

F “Bye.”

“Fang turns away from Trish and starts walking away.”

F “I’ll wait by the exit while you talk, Anon.”

“Reed gets up as she passes by and begins to follow, giving me a thumbs up.”

Re “Give you some privacy, amigo.”

“...”

“And now it’s just the two of us.”

“I get up from my spot on the floor, pins and needles in my legs making it more
difficult.”

T “...Now what do you want?”

A “I fucked up too.”

“That catches her off-guard.”

A “This is my fault too, ya know? I played a stupid game with this instead of
manning up and just talking about it.”

“I stone the fuck up and finally admit it. To the world and myself.”

A “I like Fang. I like her and I know that’s what you’re afraid of.”

A “I was never out to break anything up, I just like Fang. I want to help her.”

A “I never wanted to hurt anyone.”

“Trish’s eyes glaze over and stare at something in the distance, as if all her
worst fears came true.”

“I guess in a way they did today.”


A “I’m done, Trish. I’m not going to fight with you over this.”

A “I won’t fuck with you, you won’t fuck with me.”

--A “suc my cawk thru my jorts lol”

A “I’m going home.”

“I turn away from Trish as she buries her head in her hands again.”

“Part of me wonders if she’ll use that against me, but right now it just feels good
to get it out of my system.”

“As I begin looking for Fang, Reed stops me in the hallway.”

Re “Made the right call talking it out, trust me dude.”

“Reed shuffles his feet a bit and scratches his neck.”

Re “Gonna give you a bit of space after dealing with that. Time to think things
over, y’know?”

“Suddenly he leans in and lowers his voice.”

Re “You should tell them, bro.”

“With a cryptic wink he rushes off towards Trish, probably to give her the same
kind of therapy.”

“I throw a quick glance back to see him pull in Trish for a hug. His turn to deal
with her now.”

“What did he mean by ‘tell them’? Tell them wha-”

“...”

“Does Reed…?”

“How did he…?”

“...”

“So much for privacy.”

“I shake the thoughts from my mind and head in the direction Fang went.”
“That can wait.”

“I catch up to her near the front of the school as I mentally prepare myself for
what’s coming.”

>>move to convergence B

>>Go home early

A “Sure, let’s get out of here.”

“Reed lets out another heavy sigh.”

Re “Gonna stick around. Try and talk with Trish n’all.”

F “Reed, I… I’m taking a break from the band.”

“Reed’s expression shifts to one of sadness and shock.”

F “I just… need time to think, alright?”

Re “Like, y’know that’ll crush Trish...”

Re “But can’t really stop you if you think it’s right, dude. Taking a breather and
all...”

F “Thanks, Reed.”

“Reed offers a weak smile as we turn away from the principal’s office.”

Re “See ya, space cowboy.”

“Wait, did he just...?”

“God damn it, Reed.”

“We make our way to the front of the school as I mentally prepare myself for what’s
coming.”

>>Convergence B

“Time for the Walk of Shame.”


“As I make my way through the hall I do my best to ignore the passing jeers from
teens I don’t even know.”

“I guess it’s already spread to the lower years too.”

“Fucking lightspeed capable rumor mill.”

??? “HEY DO THE NARUTO RUN.”

??? “Look at the pathetic weeb.”

??? “How’s your 2D girlfriend Anon?”

??? “Hey Anon, need to borrow a jar?”

St “Your waifu is great and I love her!”

A “Not helping, Stella.”

“I keep my head down, avoiding the looks from them all.”

“Shouldering open the door I’m blinded by the morning sun’s glare.”

-->Even God is looking down on Anon right now

“Within an hour I’ve fallen back to square one.”

“Is it too late to transfer to another school?”

“Fang steps to the stairs, phone in hand.”

F “I can call us a taxi or something, Anon.”

“I nod at that, moving for the stairs.”

??? “HEY LOSER, THINK FAST!”

“I turn towards the voice, and the world slows down.”


“My field of vision is filled with a soda can, and I freeze up like a deer in
headlights.”

>>Duck.
>>Dodge.
>>Catch it out of the air.

>>Regardless of selection made

“The can smacks me in the forehead while I was mid-stride, and I shift my footing
to try and regain balance.”

“Except my foot catches on the edge of the stairlip and slips.”

[Falling animation and CGs here]

“...”

A “uuurg.”

??? “Oh fuck, we need to split before the Caveman gets here!”

--??? “I haven’t paid off my jeep yet!”

F “ANON!”

“My lungs feel like they’re on fire.”

“I think my feet touched the back of my head.”

“I peel myself from around the bollard, feeling every bone in my body creak
painfully.”

A “Argh… Fuck.”

F “Holy shit! You’re alive!”

A “Am I? Ow.”

“Nothing seems to be broken… I’ve been in worse.”


“Honestly my ego’s more injured than I am.”

F “Can you walk?”

A “Yeah, sure, sure.”

A “This’s nothing compared to field day back at my old school.”

“I try taking a step and my knee involuntarily twists in a direction it’s not
supposed to.”

“Suddenly, I’m doing the seth mcfarlane pose again.”

F “Oh no. Ohhh no. Let me help you up.”

“She tucks her arms around my shoulder and pulls me to my feet again.”

F “Let’s just get to the bench over there.”

F “The taxi will be here in like five minutes.”

--“Been a while since my kneecap dislocated.”

--And people wonder why I have a crippling fear of archers.

“Using Fang as a second foot, I eventually make it to the bench.”

“I still can’t bend either leg, so I just sort of splay against the sidewalk.”

“Fang sits on the other end and starts digging through her pockets.”

F “Uhh… I think I heard somewhere that nicotine relieves a bit of pain... “

A “Yeah… I could use a smoke… right about now.”

“Fang retrieves one of the cigarettes from the crumpled pack and sparks it to life
with her pink lighter.”

“She takes the first draw, then hands it to me.”


"I inhale slowly, my chest aching as my lungs fill with wonderfully numbing
nicotine.”

“The minty taste and the cool sensation settling over my skin does help to relax my
painfully tense muscles.”

“Before I know it the cigarette in my fingers is nothing but a smoldering filter.”

F “Looks like our ride’s here.”

“A grimy beater of a taxi pulls up to the curb, driven by an equally grimy


velociraptor.”

“Clearly one of the three left operating in the city.”

“Fang helps me to my feet and over to the cab, opening the door so I can shamble
in.”

Driver “...Shit, kid, you look like you got into a fight with a steamroller and
lost.”

A “Mmm.”

Driver “Now where’re you kids heading on a school day? Maybe the hospital?”

A “Home.”

Driver “Sure thing kid. Got the address.”

A “...Two-thirty-seven South St. Hammond street.”

“The driver sucks in a breath through his teeth.”

Driver “Skin Row, eh? Well I can take you s’far as the edge of the neighborhood,
deal?”

A “Yeah, whatever. Just take me home…”

“The cab speeds off away from the school.”

F “...I still can’t believe that Trish would do something like that.”

“The cab driver lets out a laugh.”


Driver “You got your ass handed to you by a girl, didn’t you?”

“I don’t bother responding while Fang kicks the back of his seat.”

Driver “Yeah, yeah, I didn’t want a tip much anyways…”

F “Why doesn’t the driver want to drive all the way to your place?”

F “It can’t be that bad, right?”

A “Uhhh… That reminds me.”

A “Hold this… for me.”

“I toss my pocket knife into Fang’s lap, she looks at me with a nervous smile like
she expects a punchline.”

F “...”

F “...Oh.”

A “Joking… kinda…”

A “Haven’t needed to shiv someone yet...”

“Talking hurts, breathing too.”

“Each breath I take feels like my ribs are gonna shatter.”

“Fang must have noticed since she kept silent after that.”

Driver “Alrighty, end of the line.”

Driver “That’ll be fifteen bucks even.”

A “There’s still a few blocks we gotta walk.”

“I manage to limp out of the car and Fang drops a few crumpled bills in her seat
and slams the door behind her.”

“The car peels out and disappears around the corner.”


A “Well, no place to go but home.”

F “Wait, you still can’t walk, right?”

“I can probably make it a good fifty yards.”

F “Hang on, give me your shoulder.”

A “No, don’t worry abou-”

“Ignoring my protests, Fang wraps my arm around her shoulder for support.”

F “Where are we going?”

A “Uhh… First turn is a right up here…”

“Wait… Fang is coming over to my place?”

“Fang is coming over to my place?”

“Fang is coming over to my place?”

“I don’t want her to see how I live!”

“...”

“Crap, did I leave Saturnia on?”

“...”

11. Confession

A “Hang on, lemme get my key…”

“I awkwardly fish around for it in my pocket, hand weighed down by some cheap first
aid stuff from the nearby liquor store.”

A “This stuff wasn’t nece-”

F “Shut up.”
F “Open the door.”

--“Reev me… I mastu composu mai desu haiku beforu I commitu sudoku…”

“I finally managed to find my key wedged between my leg and wallet.”

“Fang takes the key from me and opens the door before I can think to throw it out
the broken window nearby.”

“Welp. No turning back now.”

--A “Welcome to Brazil.”

A “Welcome to Casa Del Shithole, occupancy a miserable weeb.”

“Raptor Jesus threw me a bone at least.”

“There’s no dirty dishes stacked in the sink.”

“The trash is mostly empty save for a discarded box of cereal.”

“And my monitor is NOT displaying something Saturnia related.”

“The entrance isn’t big enough for both Fang and I, so I leave her supporting
shoulder and limp my way to the twin-sized mattress on the floor.”

“It’s so tempting to just drop face-first like usual, but I don’t think I’d survive
the shock of the fall.”

F “...Nice place…?”

A “You don’t have to stay. I just wanna curl up in bed and sleep my sorrows away.”

F “Anon it’s ten in the morning.”

A “And?”

F “And you’re fucking hurt. At least let me try and patch you up.”

A “You do-”
“Fang’s glare makes my mouth click shut.”

“Fang sets the bag of ice packs, icy hots, and sabre balm on my computer desk when
something catches her eye.”

F “Is… Is that the phone roomba you bought a while back? You actually kept that
thing?”

“Fang is standing over the shoebox I’ve been using to hold my ‘pet’.”

“I’ve put in a few wooden blocks for it to bump around.”

A “Uhh, yeah. Can you go ahead and feed him for me?”

F “...With this box of cornflakes?”

A “Yeah… Two or three will do.”

F “...And you taped your railgun to the top of it.”

A “If you look close I gave him angry eyebrows too.”

--Metal Gear RAYmba looks at me as if in response, and RULES OF NATURE blared out
from the shitty bluetooth speakers I taped to the back.

F “Why?”

A “Mom never let me have a pet. And he’s cute.”

F “He?”

A “Don’t make fun of metal gear RAYmba or else he’ll shoot you.”

F “...”

A “He’s armed with tiny angry marine munitions.”

F “...”
“Fang crumples up some of the flakes and pours the crumbs into RAY’s box.”

“I can hear it happily ingesting breakfast from my bed.”

F “You are such a dweeb, Anon.”

“There’s no heat in her words.”

“Fang turns to me, the small tub of disgusting green stuff in hand.”

F “Alright, let me see where you’re hurt Anon.”

-- A “K.”

--I drop my trousers.

“...”

--A “You’re looking at it. I’m a walking bruise right now.”

“No way in fuck.”

F “Now.”

“Shit. When did Fang learn the patented Mom Glare.”

F “Take off your shirt.”

--A “Fang, please stop trying to give me a rim job, my ribs hurt, my knees look
like Xavier's and my left lung stopped working.”

A “Wait wha-”

F “Take it off or I’ll cut it off with your knife.”

A “...Fine...”

“I walk over into my bathroom and start taking my shirt off. I look crummy and beat
up. Scratches and bruises all across my --Perfectly toned and absolutely ripped
chest --YEAAAAAAAAAAA”
“I step into my tiny shower stall and turn on the water.”

“The shower head sputters before it starts weakly spraying lukewarm water.”

“The temperature of the water doesn’t help the tension in my muscles or the bruises
marring my skin.”

“I stretch around and see massive blotches of purple and black splattered across my
torso.”

[CG of Fang examining the room, maybe holding RAYmba like a comfort pet]

“Each contusion is hot to the touch under my fingers and the pain is intense.”

“The worst is across my chest where the bollard hit me.”

“I eventually get finished examining my wicked wounds and step out of the bathroom.
Fang is on her phone doing Raptor Jesus knows what.”

“Fang then pats the bed”

F “Come here”

“I walk over and lie down on my stomach”

F “Jesus that's bad...”

“I then felt a cold cream and soft touch on my back, along with a massive jolt of
pain”

A “FUCK!”

--F “Suck it up, pussy.”

F “Shit, sorry! Are you okay?”

A “Yeah, just didn’t expect it to hurt that bad...”

F “Just try to relax.”


“I sigh and try my hardest not to freak out when she touches me”

“I don’t know what's worse, the fact Fang --A REAL FEMALE GIRL is touching me or
the intense pain.”

“She eventually finds a sweet spot of pressure to apply. It still hurts a little,
but it doesn’t cause me to wince.”

“Her hands are soft.”

“I find myself relaxing under Fang’s ministrations.”

F “Starting to feel better now?”

“I nod.”

“My eyes feel heavy as the ointment begins to warm up, drawing away tension from my
aching muscles.”

“I can make out a steady thumping on my bed”

“My senses fade more until all I’m aware of is Fang’s fingers tracing circles over
my sore back and the sound of thumping.”

“I wonder what that is.”

“Fang’s hands slow to a stop and eventually pull away, leaving me disappointed.”

--“I bust out my kazoo and play along.”

“The bed shifts.”

F “Anon.”

“There’s something in her voice, but I can’t discern it.”

A “Hm?”

F “I need to do the front.”

“Oh.”
“Okay then. I roll over onto my back.”

“And find myself face to beak with her.”

“Dangerously close.”

“I can feel her breath on my lips and I blush.”

“It never even occurred to me that I could apply the ointment on myself.”

“I want to look aside.”

“Turn my face away to hide the growing blush.”

“But I can’t.”

“I’m entranced looking into Fang’s warm amber eyes.”

“Millions of words flash through my head as I try to find something to say.”

“Fang is looking right back.”

“Eyes that seemed to glow with what little sunlight filling the room stared into
mine.”

“I wonder…”

“I hope…”

“Do you like me, Fang?”

F “A-anon…”

“I’m pulled out of my thoughts by her voice.”

“Fang’s blushing heavily too, now.”

“And her tail is positively hammering away at my bed.”


“Wait.”

“Oh fuck.”

“Did I?”

A “I- um… w-was that… did I say-“

F “Y-yeah…”

A “Fffffffffff-“

“My head sinks back into my pillow.”

A “-fffffffffffuck.”

“A snort escapes from Fang’s beak.”

F “You’re such a fucking dweeb…”

“Her fingers brush lightly across the largest bruise on my chest, without
ointment.”

F “You mutter from time to time. I didn’t start noticing til our… d-date…”

“I groan aloud.”

“So the entire time…”

F “Yeah… It’s uh… kinda cute…”

A “Raptor Jesus on his cross of rock. So for months now-“

F “I’ve known. And…”

“Fang leans over me with her hand braced next to my head in support.”

F “I… like you too…”


“Fang’s hand moves back to my chest, resting just over my machine-gun beating
heart.”

“Her head slowly descends toward mine.”

“And before we can start trying to figure out how Human-Dino tonsil hockey is
played.”

“Fang’s weight begins to press down behind her hand.”

“Which is dead center of the most serious bruise on my chest.”

A “FUCK!”

F “Oh shit sorrysorrysorry-“

A “Haaaah.”

“I manage to catch my breath.”

A “I’m okay. Just… ow…”

“My hand wraps around Fang’s.”

A “M-maybe uh… something else?”

A “That won’t stress these.”

“I nod at the blemishes across my chest.”

F “Er… liiiiike…?”

--A “lmao wanna fuck”

A “Liiike…Hug? Maybe? I don-“

“I’m cut off by Fang moving closer to me again.”

“Her arm shifts, moving from my chest to my shoulder.”


“Her wing drapes over both of us, becoming a soft and warm blanket of feathers.”

“And her head lands next to mine, sinking into our now shared pillow until I’m eye
to eye with her.”

F “Cuddling it is.”

“I smile and nod.”

“Even if Fang is now laying atop my arm and I’m starting to lose feeling in it.”

“The feel of her warm body pressed against my side is definitely worth it.”

“And between that warmth and the plush wing-blanket, my eyes grow heavy again.”

“Fang’s already started to snore, right into my ear.”

“Ah, fuck it. I close my eyes and decide that sleeping with Fang is easily the best
thing to happen to me.”

--[Lewd CG of Fang in bed here]

--“Not like that damn it.”

[Actual cuddling CG here]

“Ah, there… we… gooo…”

-- A portal opens up below us and transports us directly to Brazil.

“Zzz”

“...”

-- I dream about snoy boy piss sex penis dupe

“The next day I was about ready to get to school when Fang stopped me at the door.”

“I told her I felt fine, but when I crumbled after she poked my ribcage I decided
she had a compelling argument to stay.”
“Fang and I ended up just watching movies and playing Xrox all day.”

--“At this point I’ve beaten Rock Ring 2 on Legendary five times already."

--“I could quote all of Master Grug’s and Tana’s conversations with no prompts and
I’ve memorized all the enemy spawn points.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen Fang this morose, though.”

“Didn’t want to pry too much, even if we’re dating now.”

“Although I have a distinct hunch it’s related to the band and Trish.”

“Today though, I bit my tongue through Fang’s chest-poke test and she let me go.”

“I know she’d stayed the day before to keep an eye on me, but she still didn’t want
to go today.”

“I made her promise not to start ‘preening’ again before I left.”

“I know picking up her missed homework will cheer her right up.”

“Now that I finally have some time to myself I can properly address something I’ve
been meaning too.”

“The alarms.”

“*ahem*”

“A GIRL IS STAYING IN MY HOUSE HOW DID THIS HAPPEN!”

“How did I go from never being in a relationship to having a chick sleep over in
less than two days?!”

“Ohhhh fuck if anybody finds out…”

“Fang’s Father, Naser, Trish, all collectively splattering me on a wall.”

“It’s not like I can ask for advice, either!”

“The only other people I can ask are all hopelessly single and probably living off
government benefits!”

“My heartbeat doing Fang’s chest poke test from the inside is a good indicator I
need to calm the fuck down.”

“Just… get through today and check out some romance manga on the way home.”

“The school is as rowdy as ever.”

“Somehow, nobody confronts me about the events of two days ago.”

-- “Possibly on threat of a suplex into an automobile of some description.”

-- “There were more than a few cars with suspiciously dented hoods in the car park
too...”

“Man, the people here move on fast.”

“Maybe I should take the side route, getting bumped would probably feel like
getting gored.”

“It’s a roundabout way to reach my locker, but I got plenty of time.”

Nas “There you are!”

“I turn to see Naser pushing through the crowd of students towards me.”

“At least I can talk to him about the whole situation.”

“Or ask him for advice as well on how to handle Fang.”

“Wait.”

“Naser’s sister, Fang.”

“The Fang who skipped school and is spending the day at my apartment.”

“And never went home for the past two days.”

“Suddenly I feel like a fish being circled by a very Naser-shaped shark.”

“How do I even begin to explain to him?”

A “Uh, h-hey, Naser. What’s-”

“Naser grabs me by the jacket and shoves me against the wall of lockers.”

A “ARGH MY EVERYTHING!”
Nas “Where the hell is Fang?”

A “Woah, hey! I can-”

Nas “She ditched with you the other day and hasn’t come home since.”

Nas “Do you know what I’ve had to put up with because of you? Everything you do
with Fang is my fault for letting it happen!”

Nas “You’re lucky she texted me yesterday, Dad was about ready to file a missing
person report for her.”

A “Look, Naser. Let me explain.”

Nas “You better, before I drag your ass home and make you tell it to my Dad
instead.”

“The terrifying prospect is enough to make me pause.”

A “Fang is staying at my apartment, but-”

“Naser’s eyes shoot up like it’s the one answer he didn’t want to hear.”

A “Let me finish! But it was her idea after I fucked up my chest during an express
trip down the stairs.”

A “She wanted to make sure I was alright and wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

“Naser sighs and releases my clothes, but the scowl stays on his face.”

Nas “Is that all that happened, Anon?”

A “I mean, we played some video games but-”

--A “That and I’m really close to the world record for a Rock Ring 2 speedrun on
Legendary, I guess.”

Nas “ALL that happened?”

A “I don’t think- Oh. OH. We, uh, didn’t DO anything, if that’s what you mean.”

Nas “Mmmm...”

A “I swear! She couldn’t even kiss me because of the stupid bruise…”

Nas “What?!”

“Oh look I’m getting shoved into my locker again.”


“I hiss in pain as Naser’s fists press me against the locker.”

Nas “Why would Fang kiss you?! Anon I swear to Raptor Jesus-”

A “I told Fang I like her!”

“Shit, I said that out loud.”

“Naser freezes, and the color drains from his face.”

“Then he shoves me back into the lockers as hard as he can.”

--A “MY SPLEEN!”

A “FUCK!”

“A few students start turning their heads.”

“Naser is still frozen in place, staring at his outstretched hands with a thousand
yard stare.”

??? “Hey, isn’t that the track team leader?”

??? “He’s beating on that loser from the presentation, right? Hilarious.”

“I could visibly see Naser’s thoughts process on his face as he finally comprehends
our current situation.”
--[Joy, have Naser’s facial expression change every half-second on this line]

Nas “No, I…”

Nas “...”

“He regains control of his legs and hurriedly rushes through the crowd, pushing
aside a few students.”

“One or two classmates glance at me again, then continue on their way.”

“While I’m checking for any more broken bones my phone buzzes.”
“{i}Fang: Anyone beat you up yet :V{/i}”

“Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…”

“{i}Anon: No. On an unrelated matter, have you spoken with Naser recently?”

“{i}Fang: Told him i was staying here yesterday but havent checked his
respones{/i}”

“{i}Fang: Why do i need to kill him or something <:V{/i}”

“{i}Anon: Not yet. Just thinking it might be a good idea to get in touch with him
when you feel like it.{/i}”

“{i}Fang: I might feel like it after i stop raiding your fridge{/i}”

“{i}Anon: Die.{/i}”

“{i}Fang: >:V{/i}”

“Glad to know she’s still holding up.”

“Shit, now I’m not gonna have enough soda--gamer fuel to last the week.”

“I’ll worry about that when I get home.”

“...”

11.5 Naser drama

11.5A Breaking Things

“Today needs to end. Now.”

“I have a backpack full of missed assignments, including Mr. Tsuki’s essay on the
history of typefaces.”

“Who the fuck cares about typefaces?!”

“Worst samurai english teacher ever.”


“My ribs are burning as I heave a sigh.”

“At least I can go home now.”

“Where my hot ptero Gee Eff is waiting.”

“...”

“My hot ptero girlfriend who may or may not be having a mental breakdown in my
apartment.”

“And I have no idea what to do with a fucking girlfriend. All those hours of dating
simulators have not adequately simulated dating in the least.”

“Just as I exit the main doors of Volcano HIgh my phone buzzes against one
particularly bad bruise on my leg.”

“Fingers crossed it’s Fang.”

{i}”Naser We need to talk”{/i}

{i}”Naser Meet me in the auditorium”{/i}

“I’m going to die.”

??? “You’re gonna die weeb! Naser’s looking for your weeb ass!”

“... Best to get it over with now.”

“I meander my way to the school’s auditorium.”

“Some of the lights are off when I get there, but I can make out Naser’s outline
sitting alone in the front row.”

“He doesn’t turn to look at me when I enter or walk down the aisle.”

“He’s hunched over with his head resting in his hands, and glances at me from the
side.”

A “You uh… wanted to talk to me?”


Nas “...”

“I fold down the seat next to his.”

A “Funny, this is the same seat as the one I was in a few days ago.”

Nas “Hm…”

A “... Why did you call me here?”

Nas “Just… Shut up. Let me think.”

“He fixes his gaze at the stage curtains.”

“I can see the gears in his head turning, but his expression is telling me he
doesn’t actually know what he wants to do.”

Nas “I shouldn’t have pushed you yesterday.”

Nas “Sorry. It was a moment of weakness.”

A “Don’t worry about it, I can take a hit or two.”

“He silently nods.”

Nas “When you told me Fang could kiss you because you told her your feelings… I
can’t really describe it.”

Nas “Don’t take it the wrong way, but my mind just screamed at me ‘worst case
scenario’.”

A “I don’t follow.”

Nas “Like, uh… I told you a while back how I can’t do anything to help my sister.”

Nas “That frustration has just been getting worse.”

Nas “I’m not even sure it’s anything wrong with Fang at this point, like, it might
be me getting upset over what I don’t understand… Something like that.”
A “I wouldn’t worry too much about Fang, she tells me she’s fine.”

A “She might come back to school tomorrow, even.”

Nas “She bounces back well.”

A “Still a bit on-edge about everything though.”

A “But that’s her business, right?”

Nas “Sure…”

Nas “I still just can’t shake the feeling…”

Nas “I just can’t find the right words.”

Nas “...”

A “Does Fang and I going out bother you that much?”

Nas “It’s not that exactly, but…”

A “But?”

Nas “...”

“I’m lost.”

“Is he asking me to say something for him? That’s dumb.”

“I’m not a mind reader.”

Nas “Er…… I mean…… Ugh…”

Nas “...”

Nas “......”

A “Well, if that’s all, I’m gonna leave. I have homework and stuff to do.”
“Naser sighs.”

Nas “Yeah, sure. Sorry…”

A “Text me if you figure it out, I guess.”

Nas “Yeah…”

Nas “See you.”

“Naser looks back ahead at the curtains and doesn’t get up to follow me out of the
auditorium.”

“...”

“I fish the key from my backpack and unlock my door.”

“My place is as drab as ever, and Fang is laying in my bed paying close attention
to whatever she’s doing on her phone.”

“She looks like she hasn’t slept in days, how long has she been on her phone?”

A “Yo, I’m home. You feeling better?”

“The loud sound of chewing and a thumb up was a good enough reply.”

A “You didn’t really miss anything today.”

A “Mr. Fernsworth basically gave everyone the day off.”

“She finally finishes whatever she raided from my fridge with a massive gulp.”

F “Aaaaah.”

F “Nice, so no homework to catch up on.”

A “So, uh…”

“C’mon Anon, relationships shouldn’t be this hard.”


A “What’ve you been doing?”

F “Nothing.”

A “O-oh.”

F “Ate all your salami. Tried playing a game but I don’t know your password.”

“Thank fuck. She didn’t see any Saturnia.”

A “My bad, I guess it slipped my mind to give it to you.”

“What else can I-”

A “Oh, and Naser wanted me to meet him.”

“Fang looks up from her phone.”

F “He did? Why?”

A “Yeah, he ended up just mumbling a lot about the two of us, so I left.”

F “Ugh, what a weirdo.”

F “Can’t he stop getting into my business for, like, a week?”

F “Sickos. Him and Naomi.”

“I sit on the bed next to Fang.”

A “Hey, forget about them.”

A “How about we actually do something fun now?”

F “Sure. Like what?”

A “We could play some party games or something.”


F “...Oh…”

A “Can be something else if you want.”

F “I just thought you were going to say we should go out somewhere or something…”

A “Er, I’m trying to save money for a new game that comes out in a few weeks, so…”

F “That’s alright.”

A “Got anything you want to play in mind?”

F “No, I’m fine watching. Still have a lot to think about, y’know?”

“I get the feeling I just stuck my foot in my mouth.”

“Or maybe she’s just not telling me something?”

“Not really my place to pry.”

A “... If you say so.”

“I load up Towervania: Melody of Melancholy , and Fang’s phone buzzes.”

F “Oh, snap.”

F “Something happened, I gotta go.”

A “Someone get hurt?”

F “No, nothing that serious, but I should still be going.”

F “Don’t want to overstay my welcome here, and all.”

A “Oh, alright.”

“Fang gives a quick hug goodbye and waves as she goes out the door.”

A “...”
“I return my attention to the game and end up playing until nightfall.”

“...”

11.5C Mending Things

“Today needs to end. Now.”

“I have a backpack full of missed assignments, including Mr. Tsuki’s essay on the
history of typefaces.”

“Who the fuck cares about typefaces?!”

“Worst samurai english teacher ever.”

“My ribs are burning as I heave a sigh.”

“At least I can go home now.”

“Where my hot ptero Gee Eff is waiting.”

“...”

“My hot ptero girlfriend who may or may not be having a mental breakdown in my
apartment.”

“And I have no idea what to do with a fucking girlfriend. All those hours of dating
simulators have not adequately simulated dating in the least.”

“Just as I exit the main doors of Volcano HIgh my phone buzzes against one
particularly bad bruise on my leg.”

“Fingers crossed it’s Fang.”

{i}”Naser We need to talk”{/i}

{i}”Naser Meet me in the auditorium”{/i}

“I’m going to die.”


??? “You’re gonna die weeb! Naser’s looking for your weeb ass!”

“... Best to get it over with now.”

“I meander my way to the school’s auditorium.”

“Some of the lights are off when I get there, but I can make out Naser’s outline
among the front row seats.”

“He doesn’t turn to look at me when I enter or walk down the aisle.”

A “You uh… wanted to talk to me?”

Nas “...”

“Naser’s face contorts in deep contemplation.”

“Maybe he’s trying to find the right words?”

"Or the most discreet way to get rid of me."

“I decided to keep some distance. For both our sakes of course.”

A “... Why did you call me here?”

Nas “Just… Shut up. Let me think.”

“Finally he turns to look at me.”

Nas “I shouldn’t have pushed you earlier.”

Nas “Sorry. It was a moment of weakness.”

A “Don’t worry about it, I can take a hit or two.”

“He nods woodenly.”

Nas “*chuckle* Yeah man, sure.”


“The chuckle was less than convincing.”

Nas “Look Anon…”

Nas “When you told me Fang could kiss you because you told her your feelings… “

Nas “I can’t really describe it.”

Nas “Don’t take it the wrong way, but my mind just screamed at me ‘worst case
scenario’.”

A “It’s because I’m human, isn’t it.”

Nas “Just picture the fucked up flipper ba- hey! Anon this is serious!”

“So much for brevity.”

Nas "I'm trying to not make this any worse than it already is --"

A “You blaming yourself for something?”

Nas “Uh, no… Sort of, I don’t know.”

Nas "I was thinking only of myself, I wasn't understanding and I just unloaded it
all on you."

Nas "So no hard feelings?"

Nas "If you and Fang like each other then that's not my problem, right? You're a
nice guy, really."

Nas "If she’s happy then I'm happy, right?"

Nas "I just want to know if she can forgive me for being harsh on you, I feel like
it's one of those things she'd hate me for, right?"

“Naser’s smile could at best be called fragile.”

A “I wouldn’t worry about it too much right now, she’s under a lot of pressure."
Nas "... Did something happen to her?"

A "Because of the stunt Trish pulled she broke off with her and the band."

A “Now she’s refusing to leave my place out.”

Nas "..."

A "I’m honestly feeling out of my depth here, there’s really nothing I can do
except be there for her."

Nas "..."

A "You’re in a much better position to help her, you’re her brother and all."

Nas "It’s… complicated. You know that. I suck at helping her."

Nas "Remember earlier this year? That concert? She told me to kill myself and the
next day Trish came lashing out at me."

Nas "Telling ME how my own sibling feels about me. How she'd be better off if I
didn't exist."

Nas “Now you’re here telling me she’s having a mental breakdown, which {i}I{/i}
didn’t know.”

Nas “Hell, even Reed tells me how she’s doing sometimes.”

Nas "Fucking hell, Anon, tell me: Why do I gotta hear about how Fang feels from
Trish, Reed, and now YOU? What's so POISONOUS about me she can't tell me this shit
''THEMSELF''?"

Nas "WHY do I aggravate ''THEM'' so much?"

A "Dude!"

Nas "Shut up for a second, man. Oh God..."

“I can only watch as Naser breaks down in front of me, hands on his head in
emotional turmoil.”

Nas "..."
Nas “What did I ever do to her…?”

A “I-er…”

Nas “What, do you know?”

A “I’m thinking the two of you might be in the same boat, actually.”

Nas “Wh-shut up.”

A “She told me a while back… she does want to reconnect with you, but…”

Nas “She’s afraid of me?”

A “Herself. She’s been beating herself up ever since that… Thing that happened.”

A “Still thinks you blame her.”

Nas “What thing?”

“I gesture to one of his scars.”

Nas "What?"

Nas "You're not serious, it's over THAT shit? From fucking YEARS ago?"

A "She was in tears when she told me."

Nas "Holy shit, shut up."

A "Why don't you ask her yourself?"

Nas "I told you already, she won’t even glance my direction."

Nas "..."

Nas "Why would it be about that? I was just a little retarded kid then. I didn't
blame her for one second."
Nas "Not for one second..."

“He turns his head aside.”

Nas "You know what happened while I was at the hospital recovering?

Nas "She never showed up. I don't know why."

Nas "Mom and Dad were always there with me but Fang never saw me in the hospital."

Nas "I wanted to see her the most.”

Nas “I worryingly asked mom and dad every day where Fang was."

Nas "When I’d get restless, they had to keep telling me Fang was close by in the
building, or at home, safe."

Nas "I didn't cry when I rolled down a cliff and broke every bone in my body, but
every night when I was alone in that hospital room I cried like a baby thinking I
had disappointed my sister by doing this to her."

A "You think it's your fault?"

Nas "Yes! It’s all I do! It’s all I’ll ever do! Ruin my sister’s life!"

Nas "..."

Nas "Man..."

Nas "where did it all go wrong?"

Nas "Do you remember your life four, five years ago?”

A “Rather not.”

Nas “Things were simpler then though."

Nas "It was FINE. We hung out, we had movie nights, she'd bring her friends, we all
got along.
Nas "Somewhere in there, shit just changed. Everyone just started talking about
herbivores, genres and other shit..."

Nas "I didn't think of fighting Fang for it, but then she changed her name, started
this whole non-binary thing...”

Nas “This pronoun thing took a while to get used to, but I was happy for her at
first, going along because I didn't want to step on her toes."

Nas "I thought she'd be happier, but she only got more and more miserable and
distant, I'd try helping her and everything would just get more insufferable
everytime."

Nas "At some point Trish would just talk to me for her, and she would turn
unbearable to talk to too."

A "Trish?"

Nas "Trish isn’t a bad girl, Anon. But goddamn if she didn't inculcate in Fang’s
head ALL the wrong things.

A “Well, Fang needs you now to start putting the right things in her head again.
Please, help her.”

Nas "Anon, go away. I want to be alone for a second."

A "What do I tell Fang when I get home?"

Nas "JUST GO."

“I sigh, taking one last look at Naser as he sat motionless in the barely lit
auditorium.”

“Between Naser not being any help and my injuries, my walk home feels like agony.”

“My knee is back to not liking it when I bend it too much and I’m taking careful
breaths again.”

“He was still upset when I left…”

“Man, I’m two for two now in terms of not being able to do anything.”

“What could I have done more…?”


“I still have enough strength to get home without any major problems.”

A “Fang? I’m here!”

“My apartment door is locked...”

“...And I left my keys inside.”

“Smooth.”

“I bang my fist on the door.”

A “Fang? You in here?”

F “I’m changing, don’t come in!”

A “Why?”

F “What do you mean why? I took a shower you dumbass.”

A “But you wear the same things every day, what are you changing into?”

A “Wait, you’re not trying on my clothes again are you?”

“*BANG*”

“Was that one of her boots?”

"She seemed pretty cheery when she messaged me earlier, this isn't right."

A "Why can’t you change in the bathroom?"

“No response.”

“I rustle the doorknob a bit before hearing it unlock from the other side.”

“As soon as I enter, Fang starts pressing her fingers on all the bruises I had.”

“Worry is etched onto her face.”

“She’s acting like I'm about to fall over, geez.”

F “You ok?"

A "Whoa, calm down."


"That's close enough."

A "I'm fine, don't worry about me."

F "Good. I...I'm just a little tired. Think I’ll take a nap."

"I dropped my things on the corner of the room, went to the kitchen to check the
food..."

A "Very funny."

"Fang wasn’t joking about raiding the fridge.”

“All the salami is gone.”

“It was good salami too."

"Guess I need to go out for more."

“Back in the main room, Fang lies down on my bed.”

--“If I squint hard enough I can make out a very inviting French Fang.”

A "Are you really that tired? I figured we could go buy groceries..."

F "No..."

A "Fine, I'll just go by myself."

F "Nooooooo."

A "Don’t worry, I won’t push myself. Only getting a few things."

F "Anon, please!"

“She pulls me by my jacket so I’m sitting next to her on the bed.”

“Fang carefully hovers her hands over me, a very different attitude from when she
was poking my ribs earlier.”
F "Is your arm still hurting? Don't fucking lie to me."

A "It doesn't hurt that much, only my other wrist… and knee."

F “Good.”

"She lays her head on my arm, very carefully. It was fast becoming her preferred
pillow here."

“In any other situation I would find this cute but I totally lied to her and this
hurts like crazy.”

“I'm almost willing to have another go at the stairs if that keeps her from
touching me like this.”

F "You don't hate me, do you?"

“That’s not what I was expecting.”

A “What? Why would I ever hate you?”

F "Because...it's all my fault, right?"

F "You didn't deserve all the shit me and the others gave you..."

F “Maybe we should just… start over?”

A "Nah, I like what we have now.”

A "Maybe you do need some rest, Fang. I'll be back soon with the groceries."

“I gently slide my arm out from her grip.”

F "No! God damn it, can't you just stay still for one second? You can't leave me
here alone!"

A "What? I'm just going for groceries, what’s going on?"

F "I'm fine, I’m just… fucking dizzy."

A "What did you do?"


F "Don't leave, please..."

"I hold her by the shoulders. They feel scruffy."

A "Fang, what happened?"

F "Don't leave me here all alone..."

"I catch a speck of red on my hands as they brush against her wings."

"Oh fuck."

"Oh god damn it."

“First Aid kit! I need the First Aid kit.”

“Fang grips my arm tightly as I get up from the bed.”

F “Anon wait!”

"When I open the bathroom door a wave of humidity from the shower washes over me."

“A smear of blood on the shower stall wall."

"A feather behind the toilet."

"Another stuck to the seat."

"At least three in the bowl, one of them still has blood in it."

A “Fang…?”

"She huddles against the corner of my bed away from me.”

"Now that I look at it, her wings do seem slightly thinner."

A “You were preening again?”

“She hesitates for a moment before nodding.”


F “...Yes.”

F “I couldn’t stop doing it… it got really bad, there was blood everywhere.”

F “I spent all day cleaning it up.”

“She looks like she’s on the verge of tears.”

"I don't know what to do."

A "God fucking damn it."

F "Fuck. fuck shit."

A "Fuck."

“I make us both some microwave dino nuggets and we silently eat on the floor.”

“Groceries will have to wait for now.”

A “You think you’ll be able to go to school tomorrow?”

F “Nooo…”

A “But you’ll fall behind in class.”

F “I’ll drop out.”

A “Come on, Fang.”

F “I don’t want to see anyone right now…”

A “What about Naser? I talked to him earlier and-”

F "Fuck him."

A "He can help you..."

F "He can go die."

A "Fang, this isn’t healthy. I can’t help you through this alone."
F "But you're good at it!"

A "Then take my advice, tomorrow we go to school, you sort this out with him."

F "Why not just get him to come here today?"

A “I uh… Don’t think he’ll come to Skin Row.”

A “Why are you so against this? It’s Naser. Naser!”

“Fang’s head falls and she let’s out a shuddering sigh.”

F “It’s… Trish…”

F "Trish will probably be there.”

F “I blocked her number...”

F “She kept messaging me."

“Shit. I forgot about her.”

“And if she’s been messaging Fang all day…”

“Trish’s last plan humiliated me in front of the entire school body.”

“And all because I hung out with Fang.”

“The fuck would she pull just to talk to Fang.”

A “Okay, yeah, Trish. Fucking Trish.”

A “Well. What about your parents? Have you even told them you’re here?”

F “No fucking duh. Dad’s mad. Big shocker there.”

A “And your mom?”


F “I don’t know.”

A “Maybe she can help then.”

F “Fine, fine. I’ll text her. But I’m not going tomorrow.”

A “Okay.”

“Morosely she withdraws her phone from her pocket.”

“Her fingers tap rapidly at the screen.”

“What feels like an eternity of her writing, erasing, and rewriting a text message
ends when she looks at me with eyes filled with worry.”

“I shuffle close to her, arm carefully wrapping over her shoulder.”

“Fang thumbs the send button and sighs.”

F “There, happy?”

A “Tired actually. So uh, movie may-”

F “I just want to sleep, Anon.”

“Sleep sounds good.”

“Fang gets up first before needlessly helping me up.”

“I consider the option of changing to pajamas but I don’t think Fang would be
impressed with my Master Grug onesie.”

“Fang slips into my bed first, her wings carefully laid behind her.”

“I climb into the space she left for me.”

“Which she’s quick to invade.”

“Her head settles on my shoulder and her wings once again act as a shared blanket.”
F “Night Anon.”

A “Night Fang.”

“That night, laying together with Fang, I dreamt of us escaping all of our
problems.”

“If only.”

“...”

“Fang refused to leave again this morning.”

“I originally told her I’d have to stay as well since I didn’t want to risk her
hurting herself again.”

“She ended up swearing on her guitar she won’t hurt herself again.”

“I’ll need to pick up her assignments for today as well.”

“How did things end up like this?”

“I can’t do anything about Fang on my own, and Naser…”

“Isn’t interested in helping, to say the least.”

St “-you see Fang’s brother beat on Anon yesterday?”

St “He’s the star of the school, right?”

Ro “I’ve heard Fang has eloped with An-on, she was not at school yesterday.”

St “If that’s the case he’s changed his mind already. Hey, Anon!”

“I hadn’t noticed the two on the steps ahead of me.”

“But Rosa noticed me, judging by her waving hand and overly cheerful smile.”

>>Guess I’ll say hi.


>>Don’t want to talk to them today.
>>Guess I’ll say hi.

“I’m not in a great mood today, but I should still say hi.”

A “Good morning, Stella. Morning, Rosa.”

>>Don’t want to talk to them today.

“Really don’t want to put up with Stella’s overly positive attitude today.”

>>

R “Oh, An-on, you do not look so happy. Why?”

St “Indeed, a dark haze hangs heavy over your heart.”

“Rosa and I give the green stegosaur a flat look.”

A “Don’t worry about it, just dealing with some heavy stuff right now.”

R “Oh dear.”

St “Did you finish a good series and feel that post-finale depression?”

A “What? No.”

St “Was it because that one pervy anime got canceled? I wouldn’t have pegged you as
a fan of that kind of stuff.”

A “No Stella, it’s not that.”

St “Oh! Is it money related? Do you need money to get Fang a proper ring?”

A “What?! Why would I need to get Fang a ring?!”

St “Well I heard from a guy who heard from Mr. Carldewskii who heard from-”

A “Get to the point Stella.”


St “I heard that you and Fang are getting married.”

A “W-w-w-w-”

St “I wish you both a happy marriage!”

St “Come on, I’ll give you a reading here!”

St “I can tell you how your future life together will be!”

St “Let me get my cards out-”

A “Stella! I’m not feeling it right now, maybe later, okay?”

St “You shouldn’t go about your day without this sort of knowledge, it can really
help show your path forward!”

A “STELLA, I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOUR STUPID READINGS!”

A “Please, just leave me alone!”

“Guilt hits me immediately when I see her shirk back.”

Ro “Ay dios mio! An-on! What is the matter with you?!”

Ro “You are acting just horrible today!”

A “Sorry, Stella. Just… Don’t worry about it.”

Ro “Please tell us, what has you down?”

A “Just Fang stuff. You know she hasn’t been showing to school lately.”

A “She’s actually been refusing to leave my apartment.”

St “You mean like-”

Ro “Now is not the time, Stella.”

Ro “Is it really that bad?”


A “She... hasn’t been taking recent events well.”

“That’s one way to put it.”

Ro “I do hate to see friends in trouble, I know Fang is a good girl at heart.”

Ro “Please, if there is anything we can do, Stella and I will try to be there.”

“Rosa takes a piece of paper from her bag and hands it to me.”

Ro “My number, An-on. If you do need it.”

A “Thanks, Rosa. I’ll think about it.”

St “Do… you want a reading now?”

“The school bells interrupt.”

A “Sorry, Stella. Some other time.”

St “Awww.”

“We all enter the school and split off to our homerooms.”

“In class it feels just like the beginning of the year.”

“All alone.”

“Naomi’s apparently busy with yearbook stuff.”

“Trish and Reed have been ditching math.”

“Not that I care honestly. I just want to get home and make sure Fang is okay.”

“Time passes so quickly that it’s lunch now and I already have my tray.”

“I didn’t even realize I was walking up the stairs to the rooftop.”


“My stupor is broken by the sight of Trish and Reed.”

“Worry is etched in both their faces as they approach me.”

“Worry that I do not want to be involved in at all.”

“My feet carry me up the stairs quickly, and away from the two band members.”

“I pass through the broken threshold to the roof and manage to climb the ladder
one-handed to the top of the stair enclosure.”

Re “-Doesn’t want to talk to us. See?”

T “Damn it, where’d that skinnie go!”

Re “Trish c’mon. You’re actin’ crazy.”

T “It’s his fault Reed! If we can just get him to talk to Fang for us-”

Re “She doe-”

T “It’s THEY damn it!”

“I hear a defeated sigh and retreating footsteps.”

“I feel like Neo after dodging that.”

“Maybe Fang had the right idea about not coming back to school.”

“Who needs it, anyway?”

“Ugh, no, focus Anon.”

“I hunker down on the rooftop and silently eat my meal.”

“Just need to focus on Fang right now.”

“For the rest of the day I’m constantly on the lookout to avoid Trish.”

“I want no part in whatever she’s looking for me for.”


“Thankfully I reach the end of the day with no more triceratops-shaped incidents
and hurry my way back home.”

“Once I’m free from being intercepted on the school campus, my mind starts to
wander back to my conversation this morning.”

“Rosa and Stella seemed pretty willing to help Fang and Naser.”

“But do either of them really understand what’s actually going on? It’s not like
this is just some dumb argument.”

“I’m not really sure what either of them could do to help, either.”

“Rosa would just pull something out of the Bible to read, and Stella…”

“Stella would show them some anime about friendship or something.”

“I guess it couldn’t hurt to talk to them though, right? At the very least they
could point me in the right direction.”

“Before long I reach my apartment building, once again lost in my thoughts around
Fang.”

“At least I remembered my key this time.”

“Things seem normal enough when I enter.”

“Fang is resting in my bed, her chest rising and falling.”

“A quick look in the bathroom shows no gore splattered on the walls.”

“Still, I should check on Fang myself.”

“A closer inspection makes my heart drop like a rock.”

“Dozens of feathers are strewn about the bedsheets, most of them under Fang.”

“I bite back a scream of frustration.”

“They’re everywhere…”

“Fang’s wings are folded behind her, but I can’t see the damage at all.”

“I gently lift one to try to see where she hurt herself.”

F “Mmmng…”
F “Anon?!”

“She sits up with a jolt, a dozen feathers sticking to her side.”

F “Oh, shh-”

“She quickly sweeps the feathers off of her and into a pile behind her.”

F “Y-you’re home!”

A “Fang, why?”

A “You swore this morning you wouldn’t start again!”

F “Th-these aren’t mine! Look!”

“Fang stretches her wings out. Sure enough, there’s no fresh blood on them.”

A “Then what…?”

“My gaze shifts to my pillow.”

“I pick it up and a chunk of down falls out a hole ripped in the side.”

“I glance back to Fang in bewilderment, she’s cast her head aside in shame.”

A “I mean… It’s not self-harm, but… Why?”

F “W-well, I was looking for something to watch online…”

F “And, and I was about to see a movie when I got a call.”

F “It said it was Reed, and I remembered what you said yesterday…”

F “So I got myself ready to talk to him, since it’s what you’d want me to do…”

F “And…”

F “...It wasn’t Reed.”


F “Trish used his phone.”

F “I just couldn’t stop myself from ripping something, I’m sorry Anon.”

A “Hey.”

“I scootch closer to her on the bed and put an arm around her.”

“She turns and buries her face in my collar.”

A “Don’t worry about the pillow.”

A “I’m more worried about you.”

A “You can’t just hide here forever, you know?”

F “...”

A “...”

A “How about going out for a good meal?”

A “We’re out of food here anyways.”

A “Are you able to go somewhere if it’s with me?”

“I feel her head nod against my chest.”

A “I’ll place a reservation at Moe’s, why don’t you clean the feathers off your
arms?”

“She slowly lets go and gets up for the bathroom to get ready.”

“When the door clicks I call Rosa.”

Ro “Yes?”

A “Yeah, I need your help with Fang.”


Ro “I’ll be glad to help as best I can!”

A “This is a longshot, but…”

A “Can you get Naser to Dino Moe’s Pizza in Little Trudoon within the hour?”

Ro “Is that all? Of course I can!”

Ro “I will go get him now!”

“She hangs up on me.”

“The bathroom door swings open and Fang throws a fistful of down into the kitchen
trashcan.”

F “Okay… I’m ready.”

A “Great, think we can catch the next bus in ten minutes if we leave now.”

“…”

“For all the heartache and mental anguish I’ve been through these past few days
there’s one good thing to come of it.”

“I’m on an actual date!”

--”With a girl!”

F “Such a dweeb, Anon.”

“I feel my cheeks warm up as Fang’s fingers interlock with mine.”

“We’re in Moe’s reception now. In hindsight I should’ve called Moe too.”

Moe “Aye! My lil Lucy! Back again so soon?”

“I can feel Fang flinch as her barrel chested uncle hobbles toward us.”

Moe “And you brought Anon! Must be date night den!”


F “Y-yeah. Date night. Please don’t tell dad.”

Moe “O’ course! I know ole Rip would jus’ keel over.”

A “Thanks Moe.”

Moe “No problem no problem. Nows let’s get you twos settled in. Jerry! Get dat
table clean NOW!”

“We wait a little longer in the foyer as the overworked employee scrubbed the booth
table clean.”

Moe “So’s, you two official nows?”

“I notice a fluffy white wing slowly wrap itself over my shoulder.”

“I now look like I have a feathered cloak hiding my Ptero girlfriend from view.”

A “Y-yeah. We are, Moe.”

“I don’t know if I’m wincing at the awkwardness or the pain from Fang’s claws
digging into my hand.”

“Probably both.”

“Moe laughs regardless.”

Moe “In dat case I’ll make sure dat your date night goes perfectly.”

“The old t-rex leads us to our clean table and sets about lighting the lone candle
there with an extra long barbecue lighter.”

Moe “Dere we go. Don’ worry ‘bout the menu, kids. I’ll set yous up right.”

“When I take my seat across from Fang, she gets up to sit next to me and lays her
head against my shoulder.”

A “Wasn’t expecting it’d be free. Your uncle’s pretty nice.”

F “Yeah, he’s nice...”


“We sit a while, listening to the soft music playing through the cheap speakers.”

“It only now occurs to me Fang might not like the sudden appearance of her
brother.”

A “You holding up so far?”

F “Heh. I’m not that fragile, come on.”

A “Certainly had me fooled.”

“She bumps her elbow into my side.”

A “Ow.”

“My phone buzzes in my pocket. Probably Rosa.”

“I discreetly peek at the notification.”

“She’s here already?”

“I crane my neck around to see Rosa enter, dragging a horrified Naser by the arm.”

“Suddenly my stomach tightens and I’m having second thoughts.”

“Rosa spots me through the lattice and her face lights up.”

“I cover my eyes with one hand and slump in my seat.”

Ro “An-on! Fang! What a happy coincidence to see you two here!”

Nas “Is- is this what you dragged me here for, Rosa?”

“Fang’s voice is an angry hiss in my ear.”

F “What did you do?!”

A “I’m here with you, just give it five minutes.”

F “I am so not buying you a new pillow.’


“Rosa practically shoves Naser into the seat across from me and sits down herself.”

Nas “Rosa I thought you wanted to talk about the gardening club budget!”

“He’s quick to turn his glare from the latina --latinx to me.”

Nas “What’s all this about, Anon?”

Nas “I told you before, I…”

Ro “Hush, this was my idea.”

Ro “You were just telling me in the car you were having struggles with your
sister.”

Nas “Yeah, but…”

Ro “Go ahead and try talking to Fang about it.”

“Fang shifts in her seat to get up and I squeeze her hand to get her to stop.”

F “Ngh.”

Nas “...”

Nas “... Uh… Well…”

Nas “... I guess I want to say-”

Moe “ALRIGHT I BROUGHT BREADSTICKS FOR THE LOVELY COUPLE.”

“Rosa slams her head into the table.”

Moe “Whoa, Nasah?!”

Moe “I sees you’ve finally dumped that strumpet!”

Moe “I’z told you she was bad for yous, I did!”
Moe “Do I know how to call ‘em or what?”

“Moe’s powerful jaw clicks shut when he notices our unenthused stares.”

Moe “... Dis ain’t a double date, ain’t it?”

A “Thank you for the breadsticks, Moe, but it’s not the best timing.”

“Moe drags over a chair with his tail and sits in it with his tiny arms on the
backrest.”

Moe “Nobody tells me nothin’ anymore from your family, you twos, but I got a good
idea what this’d be about.”

A “Moe, you really don’t have to-”

Moe “Don’t think I haven’t noticed how little Lucy there looks.”

Moe “Even little Nasah looks like he’s had the shit kicked outta him.”

Moe “Ol’ Moe can intuit what’s happenin’.”

Moe “As for Nasah’s new lady friend and you, please give us a little privacy.”

Moe “Family matters are best handled by da family.”

“Fang turns a worried look my way as her claws once again dig into my hand.”

“An old memory flashes in my head.”

“If it worked for Naser…”

A “It’ll be fine, Fang. I’ll be nearby.”

“I draw her into a hug and my cheek rubs softly against her long beak.”

“I pull away to see Fang with a luminescent blush across her cheek.”

“I shuffle out of the booth and stand next to Rosa.”


Moe “JERRY! GIT DESE TWO A TABLE AN’ SOME MOZZARELLA STICKS!”

“The overworked busman brought us to a small table on the opposite end of the
restaurant.”

“Guess this isn’t the first time this kind of thing has happened.”

A “So uh… Now what Rosa?”

Ro “Mr. Moe said it best. Family matters are solved by familia.”

Ro “We just sit and wait now.”

“She grimaces as her eyes sweep over the menu.”

Ro “Is there any vegetarian options here?”

A “Why not the pasta?”

Ro “I am watching my figure, An-on.”

“I hope Moe can solve this quickly.”

Ro “You know, this is to help you too, An-on.”

“What.”

Ro “You yourself look like you are struggling with something.”

Ro “Let me hear {i}your{/i} troubles, An-on.”

“My troubles?”

“I look across the room to see Naser and Fang actually laughing with Moe.”

“My heart clenches as I wish I was there with Fang.”

Ro “Is it your new relationship?”


A “*sigh* That and a hundred other things.”

Ro “Let it out, An-on. There is no need to bottle up these anxieties of yours.”

“It was as if a bulwark broke.”

“The words spilled from my lips at so rapid a pace I feared Rosa wouldn’t
understand.”

“I told her everything.”

“From how I wound up at Volcano High, all my inner turmoil there, even my romantic
failings.”

“Time slipped by as I used this rare moment to finally vent about everything around
me.”

“And through it all Rosa simply smiled and nodded.”

“Few times she would speak up, if only for clarification or to offer sympathy.”

“Our meal came and went ignored.”

“I just kept talking and talking until I couldn’t anymore.”

“My throat is so dry now and my voice is hoarse.”

“God how long was I talking.”

“Rosa slides out from her chair and steps around it.”

“Her fist rocks my shoulder back harshly.”

A “Agh! What was that for?!”

Ro “For being a stupid boy. Here, drink.”

“I take the proffered glass of water and down it greedily.”

“As soon as I set the cup down a pair of arms wrap around my head.”
“Oh god oh fuck Rosa is actually gonna kill me.”

--Ro “Remember the basics of CQC.”

--”*Snap* Game over.”

--Re “You’ve created a time paradox Anon!”

Ro “You stupid boys. Always hiding away your own pain.”

“Her heavy hand rubs my head gently as she cradles it against her chest.”

Ro “Be sure you tell Fang of this, okay?”

A “...Okay…”

Ro “Good. Personally I think you two are absolutely adorable.”

Ro “But my Lord on His cross of rock are you two dumb.”

Ro “Always hiding away these pains you have from the world and your loved ones.”

“Rosa loosens her grip around my head and I sneak a glance over towards Fang and
Naser.”

“They aren’t trying to kill each other, so they seem to have made some progress.”

“I almost think I just saw Fang actually smile.”

“Right as I turn back to the table, my ears are assaulted by Moe’s Italian
shrieking from across the restaurant.”

Moe “AY! YOUS KIDS CAN COME ON BACKS NOW!”

“The first thing I notice on the way over is how much more lively Fang and Naser
look, like they had regained all of their lost energy.”

“Before I can take a seat Fang gets up and wraps her arms around my head.”

“I almost ask her what the deal is, but I can feel the icy stare she’s shooting at
Rosa from here.”

Ro “F-Fang, you know I didn’t mean it like that!”

“Fang lets out the laugh she was holding in.”


F “I know, just messing.”

“I let out a sigh of relief. Fang’s back to making jokes, that’s good.”

Moe “It’s good to sees ol’ Moe could help to sets things straight. Don’t ever
hesistate on coming right backs if yous needs it!”

Moe “And good job on gettin’ yousself a better half Nasah, she’s a better looker
than your old lady friend.”

Nas “Wait, Rosa isn’t my-”

Nas “Naomi and I are still-”

Moe “I knows, you’re probably all heart broken about da break up, but dun do it in
front of yer new gal, Nasah.”

Moe “Allsways said dat melograno mignotta waz nevah goods tah yah.”

“Moe rushes off before Naser can finish his sentence, leaving the four of us alone
once again.”

“I promptly take my place in the booth next to Fang, feeling her clawed fingers
lock with my own.”

“Rosa on the other hand took a seat a conspicuous distance from Naser, and I’m not
quite sure who looks more embarrassed.”

“The rest of the time at Moe’s goes by pretty well, whatever family trick up his
tiny sleeve seemed to have worked.”

“Fang is more calm than I’ve seen her in months, Naser is talking and laughing
without having to walk through a verbal minefield.”

“From everyone’s mood alone, I feel like a burden is lifted from my shoulders.”

“Dinner is lively, and Rosa offers to take Fang and I home.”

“Fang agrees to return to her place with Naser.”

“She drops me off back at my place, and I return Fang’s backpack to her.”

“After locking the door I collapse on my bed, completely spent.”

“... I forgot to get a new pillow.”

“...”
“Fang texts me while I’m walking to school the next day.”

“Fang: i slept like a rock last night lol”

“Fang: you feeling better too?”

“Anon: Yeah. Were your parents upset?”

“Fang: im friggin”

“Fang: grounded from everything basically forever”

“Anon: Uh oh.”

“Fang: my mom will forget in like a week lmao :V”

“Fang: see you in science as always, right?”

“Anon: Yeah, of course.”

“Anon: What do you plan to do about your missing assignments?”

“Fang: naser stayed up to help me with them.”

“Fang: i think he did most of it though lol”

“Warms my heart to see she’s back to normal.”

“Wait, she still hasn’t spoken with Trish.”

“I shouldn’t be worried.”

“But… when she called, Fang…”

Re “Yo, Anon! Wait up!”

“I instinctively start picking up the pace.”

Re “Wait, man! I need to talk to you about Trish!”


“Ugh. Well, I don’t have a beef with Reed, can’t hurt to talk.”

A “What?”

Re “Trish’s been, like, super beat up over everything that’s happened.”

A “So I’ve heard.”

Re “So, you wouldn’t mind if, uh…”

A “No, Reed.”

Re “Huh?”

A “I’m not going to lure Fang into meeting Trish so she can try to fix their
abusive relationship.”

“Reed winces.”

Re “Read me like a book, huh?”

Re “Come on, man. Trish’ll be better this time, I know it.”

Re “Just give it a chance, what’s the worst that could happen.”

“I hear the desperation in his voice.”

“Hesitating, I sigh and roll my eyes.”

A “...Fine. But I’m going to be there and we’re leaving the split second I can tell
it’s not going well.”

Re “Oh man, you’re a lifesaver! Just bring her over into the auditorium for lunch,
I’ll make sure Trish doesn’t flake!”

“Reed excitedly jogs away to his homeroom.”

“That’s the most relieved I’d ever seen him.”

“Guess Trish really is sorry.”


“I give Fang the memo as I duck into class moments before the bell.”

“Fang: i dunno…”

“Fang: youll be there right? <:V”

“Anon: Of course I will.”

“Fang: ill try not to get too worked up in anticipation then. :V”

“I sigh and glance at the clock.”

“I feel like my mood’s been put in a guillotine now.”

“And Trish and Reed are the ones in the black hoods.”

“The anxiety’s returned, making time crawl by so slowly now.”

“Even in science, where Fang and I could at least sit next to each other and talk
didn’t alleviate it.”

“But Math…”

“Mr. Carleciidewski was unconscious at his desk, once again being of no help.”

“Reed is now sitting behind me, and every time I glance back he smiles and nods.”

“Trish is nowhere to be seen.”

“The ticks of the clock’s second hand are a countdown to doomsday and I’m at the
epicenter of it.”

“The lunch bell blares loudly and I shuffle out from behind my desk.”

“A powerful arm wraps around my shoulder, dragging me to the door.”

Re “C’mon man, sooner we get our food the sooner we can put all this behind us.”

“There’s an edge of something to Reed’s voice, making his words sound unnatural.”
“My phone vibrates in my pocket.”

“When I reach for it Reed bumps me.”

Re “Whatcha want for lunch?”

A “I uh… what’re they serving?”

“Another buzz in my pocket.”

Re “Well I think it’s mystery meatloaf and pizza today.”

“And another.”

A “One sec-”

Re “Yo the line’s moving.”

“I’m bumped forward in line by Reed.”

“My phone is vibrating nonstop now.”

A “Reed what’re you-”

Re “Just trying to get us some grub before we see Trish and Fang. Don’t wanna do
this on an empty stomach right?”

“I get my phone out at last to see-”

Re “Yo so the pizza right? Let’s get the pizza.”

A “Reed what is with you right now?!”

“I glance at my phone’s screen to see ten messages all from Fang.”

“Reed pushes me forward and my phone hits the floor.”

A “God damn it Reed!”

Re “I got it Anon.”
“He scoops up my phone and pockets it.”

Re “Food first, man, c’mon.”

A “Reed seriously what the fuck is up with you!”

Re “What? Nothing, man, just us two getting some food. Right?”

A “... Give me back my phone, Reed.”

Re “...”

Re “......”

Re “Sorry.”

“I drop my tray and make a break down the hall towards the auditorium.”

“Reed is chasing close behind only a few feet behind me.”

Re “Anon, wait!!”

“Think I’m managing to outpace him.”

“Just need to turn the corner and it’s on the other end of the hall.”

“I hear Reed’s footsteps get further away, and stop for a split second.”

“Did he give up?”

##fire alarm noise starts, loud enough to recognize but not enough to be painful.
Joy you nigger if you use something stupid you’re getting another role. Fucked Up
Flipper Goat Child

“What the fu-?!”

“Water sprays from the ceiling and the halls are quickly crowded with screaming
students running for their lives, the teachers trying fruitlessly to keep them
calm.”
“Reed, you dirty bastard!!”

“I’m shoved aside from all angles by the student body.”

“Just a dozen more feet to the door-!”

“I finally manage to get my hand on the handle and-”

A “*Glk-!*”

Re “Sorry, man.”

-- Re “Is only business.”

“He’s got me in a chokehold with one arm.”

## Fire alarm stops

Re “Convenient.”

“Reed opens the door with one foot to look in.”

Re “You’ll see, man. It’s all going well.”

“I can only watch the scene before me unfold.”

T "{i}WHY{/i} don't you want to talk about it?"

T "Please talk to me, {i}PLEASE{/i}."

T "It's been days, didn't you have enough time to think about it already?"

F "Fuck off from my life, already!"

T "No, Fang, I won't! I helped you, remember? I wanna keep helping you."

F "You USED ME. YOU BETRAYED ME."

T "I did not! You couldn't deal with yourself, you weren't happy with how things
were going."

T "I HELPED you achieve a new YOU, you've embraced something beautiful, I was proud
of you!"

F "I don't NEED a NEW me-"

T "I don't UNDERSTAND, would you PLEASE tell ME what's so WRONG?"

F "Please Trish, stop talking to me."

T "BUT WHY?"

F "STOP YELLING."

T "What about the other guys? What about the band?"

F "You ruined everything! It was supposed to be fun!"

T "How? Please tell me."

F "You just took control of everything, we were doing what you wanted all the
time."

T "We VOTED to know what to do next!"

F "And we only did what you wanted!"

T "Because I THOUGHT you'd be ok with it, if you didn't agree with anything I did
then you should've just TOLD ME"

F "You should have known!"

F "You're confusing me!"

T "IT WAS {i}YOUR{/i} IDEA."

T "YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WANTED US TO TAKE THE BAND MORE SERIOUSLY- AND I DID"

T "I WAS JUST DOING WHAT YOU WANTED BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WOULD HAVE MADE US
HAPPIER."
F "..."

T "..."

"Reed’s chokehold is making my wounds flare up again. Can I just die? Right here?"

T "You didn't answer about the band, what about vvurm drama?"

F "I don't know Trish. It's over, ok?"

T "I was HOPING you were just taking a time-off to cool off and RECONSIDER-"

T "WHAT'S HAPPENING TO YOU, FANG?"

F "I don't know who you are anymore, Trish. You did something that's making me
question YEARS of my life- WASTED YEARS."

T "Because of him? That's what it is?"

T "You're really just gonna THROW AWAY our entire life together, since we were kids
- up until now- just as we're about to make it-"

F "Trish, no, I didn't mean it- I-"

T "Everytime I offered you a shoulder to cry on, the songs we wrote, the stories we
came up with, all gone? Is that it?"

T "And for fucking what?"

T "For a fucking bum you met a few months ago? Is this what you want, to become a
trailer wife?"

T "To do absolutely fucking NOTHING all day inbetween getting beaten up and feeding
little brats to the benefit of some penniless NOBODY?"

T "I was always here for you, we do EVERYTHING TOGETHER, and THIS is how you thank
me? By kicking me out of your life to become a CUM DUMPSTER for this worthless
PRION?"

T "do you NOT see what's wrong here?"


T "..."

T "You told me when the year started you were scared shitless you weren't gonna
amount to anything in life."

T "Are we in this together or not? If not you'll dive headfirst into exactly THAT,
you'll be a nobody!"

T "Remember? I still HAVE THE MESSAGES, LOOK."

T "You KNOW I'm right. I'm always right!"

T "Answer me, Fang!"

“Reed lets go of my neck completely.”

“He wordlessly puts his hands in his pockets and withdraws my phone.”

“The phone is dropped limply in my palm and Reed turns away silently.”

“I only caught a glimpse of it, but I saw the disappointment in his eyes.”

Re “...”

“I stand back up and throw the door open.”

“Silence washes over the room.”

“Eventually Fang takes a deep breath and lets it out, before facing Trish again.”

F "Fuck."

F "Off."

F "Just fuck off from my life, Trish."

T "..."

“Trish shoots me another of those petty glares before dashing out the side door.”
“Fang folds a seat down and sits in it with her knees to her chest, covering
herself with her wings.”

“I sit next to her and she starts silently weeping into her knees.”

“I reach through the wings and find a hand to hold.”

“The lunch bell comes and goes, as does the tardy bell for music class.”

“We ended up ditching the last few classes and just go back to my apartment again.”

“...”
11.5D Sorting Things

“Today needs to end. Now.”

“I have a backpack full of missed assignments, including Mr. Tsuki’s essay on the
history of typefaces.”

“Who the fuck cares about typefaces?!”

“Worst samurai english teacher ever.”

“My ribs are burning as I heave a sigh.”

“At least I can go home now.”

“Where my hot ptero Gee Eff is waiting.”

“...”

“My hot ptero girlfriend who may or may not be having a mental breakdown in my
apartment.”

“And I have no idea what to do with a fucking girlfriend. All those hours of dating
simulators have not adequately simulated dating in the least.”

“Just as I exit the main doors of Volcano HIgh my phone buzzes against one
particularly bad bruise on my leg.”

“Fingers crossed it’s Fang.”


{i}”Naser We need to talk”{/i}

{i}”Naser Meet me in the auditorium”{/i}

“I’m going to die.”

??? “You’re gonna die weeb! Naser’s looking for your weeb ass!”

“... Best to get it over with now.”

“I meander my way to the school’s auditorium.”

“Some of the lights are off when I get there, but I can make out Naser’s outline
sitting alone in the front row.”

“He doesn’t turn to look at me when I enter or walk down the aisle.”

“He’s hunched over with his head resting in his hands, and glances at me from the
side.”

“Some of the lights are off when I get there, but I can make out Naser’s outline
sitting alone in the front row.”

“He doesn’t turn to look at me when I enter or walk down the aisle.”

“He’s hunched over with his head resting in his hands, and glances at me from the
side.”

A “You uh… wanted to talk to me?”

Nas “...”

“I fold down the seat next to his.”

A “Funny, this is the same seat as the one I was in a few days ago.”

Nas “Hm…”

A “... Why did you call me here?”


Nas “Just… Shut up. Let me think.”

“He fixes his gaze at the stage curtains.”

“I can see the gears in his head turning, but his expression is telling me he
doesn’t actually know what he wants to do.”

Nas “I shouldn’t have pushed you earlier.”

Nas “Sorry. It was a moment of weakness.”

A “Don’t worry about it, I can take a hit or two.”

“He silently nods.”

Nas “When you told me Fang could kiss you because you told her your feelings… I
can’t really describe it.”

Nas “Don’t take it the wrong way, but my mind just screamed at me ‘worst case
scenario’.”

A “Why’s that?”

Nas “Because it’s {i}my{/i} sister we’re talking about here.”

A “So? Fang said she likes me too.”

A “So we’re dating now. I think.”

“Naser clamps his hands up to his crest.”

Nas “Dating, even…Sweet Raptor Jesus...”

A “Why are you so surprised, I told you months ago I liked her, didn’t I?”

Nas “Yes, you told me {i}you{/i} liked {i}her{/i}.”

Nas “I never expected her to LIKE YOU BACK.”

Nas “Explain yourself, now.”


A “I… I don’t even really know how this happened- I-I mean, I’ve barely even had
friends before, let alone something romantic!”

A “I don’t know how this happened!”

A “Why would someone, anyone want to go out with {i}me{/i}?! Me, Naser!”

A “I wouldn’t go out with me!”

A “I have no idea what I’m doing!”

“Naser leans back with a hand holding his beak.”

Nas “Oh, man, you’re worse off than I thought.”

Nas “Breathe, man.”

--Nas “You don’t want to end up like Eorge Flo.”

A “I {i}am{/i}. It {i}hurts{/i}.”

Nas “Geez, at this rate I’m going to be more concerned for you than Fang.”

A “Like, thinking about being with Fang, a part of me is fucking exuberant to the
point of being higher than Reed. Reed!”

A “But then I start thinking how I don’t KNOW how to date and get so worried that I
feel like I’m going to vomit.”

A “And then there’s my heart beating so hard and the fucking bruise and everything
is fuck. Everything is fucking fuck, Naser.”

Nas “BREATHE!”

“I finally notice the black spots in my vision and gasp.”

“My lungs explode in pain and I falter back against my chair for support.”

A “Is this a panic attack? Naser I think I’m having a panic atta-”
“My head snaps to the side and a fresh stinging pain blossoms on my cheek.”

“I take the seconds of intense pain to focus and collect myself.”

A “Did you just slap me?”

Nas “Yes.”

A “...”

Nas “You calm now?”

A “Not really.”

Nas “Would another slap help?”

A “I’m calm I’m calm.”

Nas “You’ve got it bad, Anon.”

A “Got what bad?”

Nas “You’re in love with Fang.”

A “How is that bad?”

Nas “Fang. You {i}both{/i} need help at this point.”

A “Now that’s just uncalled for.”

Nas “It’s true. Last thing you need is to be romantically involved.”

A “What if that’s exactly what we need?”

Nas “Just… Let me get this straight.”

Nas “You have never had a girlfriend before.”

A “Yes.”
Nas “Ever?”

A “Yes, why?”

Nas “Aside from being sad, that just makes it really not a good idea to go for what
seems like such a… poor combination.”

A “That a challenge?”

Nas “Wha-are you even paying attention?”

A “I can be a great boyfriend, just you watch.”

Nas “Oh my g-”

Nas “...”

Nas “You know what?”

Nas “You may be right.”

A “Hm?”

Nas “Maybe just the thing Fang needs is someone to support her.”

Nas “I clearly can’t do anything, and neither can our parents, or anyone we know.”

Nas “But thinking back to a few days ago… she did shield you from the crowd and get
you out of the auditorium.”

Nas “I brushed it off but... it’s clear she cares for you.”

Nas “So you know what Anon? I’ll trust you.”

A “Dowha?”

“Naser gets up from his seat, motioning for me to follow.”

Nas “I’ll help you get to know Fang a bit better, and in return, you need to keep
your promise of being a great boyfriend to her.”

A “I- uh, yeah! Thank you, Naser. Uh, where are we going?”

Nas “You’re gonna need some supplies.”

“I follow Naser to the parking lot, where his half-beaten car awaits.”

Nas “Listen up, because this is all I really know.”

A “Wait, should I be taking no-”

Nas “First thing is you should always have a giant bag of dino-nuggies in your
fridge, with her name written on it with a sharpie.”

Nas “Be warned, she counts them. You eat any and it’s all over.”

“I climb into the passenger seat as Naser revs up the NasCar.”

Nas “You’re gonna need some barbecue sauce too. And none of the bargain bin stuff,
Fang ONLY likes top shelf dipping sauce.”

“The car violently peels out of the parking lot.”

“Naser continued to rattle off a checklist of do’s and don’ts for Fang, even as he
takes me around various stores to stock up.”

Nas “If she ever says she ‘isn’t hungry’, she is lying through her teeth.”

Nas “Most places know what you need if you say ‘my girlfriend isn’t hungry’.”

Nas “Next, either get a good supply of earplugs or say goodbye to your sense of
hearing entirely. She can and will stay up until two a.m. listening to music on
full blast.”

“Naser tells me more information about Fang than I probably should have known.”

Nas “And lastly, she will rip your shirt at least once. Have spares ready.”

A “What?!”
Nas “Oh yeah. This is actually my fifth jacket this semester.”

A “I-I see…”

“So that confirms Naser is just colorblind if he keeps getting these fuckugly
jackets.”

A “So… I’ve got your blessing?”

Nas “IF you help my sister, Anon.”

A “Of course! I’ll be the best boyfriend.”

Nas “You better. Because otherwise it won’t be me next time.”

A “Wha-”

Nas “Dad needs a new caddy. He’ll probably ask you and then you’ll go missing.”

A “...”

“Ah. Fuck.”

Nas “Now tell me where your place is so I can drop you off.”

“Naser hesitates when I give him my address.”

Nas “Skin Row? You know I should have figured, but still…”

“He speeds off in the direction of my apartment with all the grace of a semi
truck.”

“Once we reach my neighborhood, his driving gets even more erratic.”

“Never stopping at stop signs and staying just above the speed limit.”

“Paranoid much?”

“Naser finally comes to a stop in front of my building to let me out.”

A “Thanks for the ride, Naser. And the, er… Fang stuff, too.”

“Naser’s gaze is fixed on the building’s doors instead.”

Nas “So you’re going up to see Fang now, huh…”


A “You know you can come talk to her with me, if you want.”

Nas “No! I mean, can’t leave my car alone in this neighborhood. Don’t want
something to happen to it, right?”

“He tops it off with a less than genuine laugh.”

A “Naser, your car has more dents than most of the ones around here.”

A “Also, I need help carrying all this stuff.”

Nas “What? There’s like four bags, you can carry it fine.”

A “Not with these crippling injuries.”

A “You slamming me into the locker didn’t help either.”

A “Oww, It’s a {i}miracle{/i} I’m still able to breathe.”

“Naser rolls his eyes.”

Nas “Fine, I’ll carry the crap up. But only for a moment, I don’t want my car
getting jacked.”

“He gets all the bags from the backseat and I lead him up the stairs to my place.”

Nas “... Has Fang been doing alright here?”

A “Probably still a bit rattled.”

A “Wasn’t in the best mood this morning either.”

A “Probably a good idea to not get confrontational or anything, yeah?”

“Naser nods and I unlock the door.”

“I hold the door open for Naser. He hesitates to enter so I look in to see Fang sat
on my bed mashing away on The Duke furiously.”

F “Naser?!”

A “Don’t freak out, he’s just here to- wait.”


A “Why are you playing rockband with a controller?”

F “You mean I was doing it wrong?”

A “And my account was locked, how did you even get that to start?”

F “Dude, your password was ‘RAYmba’.”

F “Who cares about that, why’s {i}he{/i} here?”

“Naser waves dismissively.”

Nas “Well, Anon, you’re welcome for the ride, I’ll just be going now.”

F “-Wait, Naser.”

“He freezes halfway out the door.”

F “... How much do you know?”

Nas “Uh… Know?”

F “About me and Anon.”

Nas “Anon filled me in earlier.”

F “You what?!”

A “Fang, don’t worry, he’s cool!”

F “You weren’t planning on telling Dad I’m here, were you?”

Nas “... No, I wasn’t.”

F “I’m serious, you can’t tell him, he’d kill Anon!”

Nas “No, really, I wasn’t going to tell.”


F “Please, Naser, I need to know for absolute sure.”

Nas “God damn it, Fang!”

Nas “Why don’t you trust me with even this?!”

“Naser inhales deeply and turns towards the door.”

Nas “Sorry. I’m going now. I won’t tell, I swear.”

F “...”

F “It’s not that I don’t trust you…”

“He pauses again with his hand on the doorknob.”

“Like Spears’ did numerous times in the past, I take hold of Nasers’ shoulder.”

“I offer a reassuring smile and nod back towards Fang.”

A “...”

Nas “... Then what? Why do you hate me?”

F “... I don’t hate you…”

F “Every time I see… those…”

Nas “Those…?”

F “Your scars, I mean.”

F “I just remember that day back then.”

Nas “What does that have to do with anything?”

F “I mean, It’s my fault, isn’t it?”

F “I lied to you, and you got hurt.”


Nas “...”

F “But it’s like you don’t blame me, even though you should.”

F “Everyone depends on you, you’re the star player at school, but it’s in spite of
your family instead of because of it.”

F “You can’t even bring yourself to hate me…”

Nas “All this time, that’s what this was about?”

“Fang wipes away a tear with her wing and nods.”

“Naser brushes my hand off his shoulder and turns around.”

Nas “I don’t hate you because I don’t blame you for anything, Fang.”

Nas “Back then, we were only kids, I was eleven? Twelve?”

Nas “I was always thinking I’d done something wrong because of how you acted
differently since then.”

Nas “I thought you hated me.”

Nas “I mean, look at all the shit I’ve ruined for you.”

Nas “Band practices, shows, parties, hell, dates even.”

Nas “All I ever do is ruin things for you.”

Nas “And when I did I’d always get told off by Trish.”

“A part of me wants to groan at just the mention of her name.”

“Oh… I think I did since both Naser and Fang are looking at me.”

A “Ahaha…”

F “Urgh, way to ruin the moment Anon.”


Nas “Real smooth, man. Real smooth.”

A “Oh come on, you two were finally making progress.”

F “Remind me why we’re dating again?”

Nas “Hey, he’s your boyfriend. Cut him some slack.”

A “What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“The siblings chuckle lightly at my expense.”

“The things I do for people…”

“Once the laughter ends Fang looks at Naser.”

F “Look, Naser, for all of Anon’s faults I do like him.”

F “Which is why I’d rather dad not arrest him and kill him.”

F “I know I haven’t been a good… sibling…”

F “But I’m begging you here.”

Nas “I told you before, I won’t tell.”

Nas “Just be sure to come home later tonight.”

“Fang hisses and looks away.”

Nas “...You ARE coming home tonight, right?”

F “Weeeeell…”

A “What-”

Nas “WHAT?!”

F “I need to stay to look after my idiot boyfriend.”


A “I don’t need- AIIIEEE!”

“Fang withdraws her finger from the bruise on my chest.”

A “FUCK! God, again with the tests?”

Nas “What am I supposed to tell dad then? Hell, what have you been telling him?”

F “That I’ve been staying at Naomi’s place for a group project.”

A “...”

Nas “...”

F “Well I can’t say I’m staying at Trish or Reed’s place.”

Nas “But Naomi?”

F “If I told dad I was staying at Anon’s place in Skin Row what do you think would
happen?”

Nas “...Okay, fair point.”

A “Are you actually okay staying here though?”

“Fang shrugs and looks away.”

F “S’not bad. Just… boring when I’m all alone.”

F “And there’s not much to eat here.”

A “Well let’s fix that last part then.”

“I get a questioning look from Fang as I take one of the grocery bags from Naser.”

“Her eyes instantly lock onto the hefty back of dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets I
take out.”

A “You gonna stay for dinner Naser?”


Nas “I want to but-“

“The loud blaring of a car alarm has Naser drop the rest of the bags onto the floor
and rush out the door.”

Nas “Shit! The NasCar!”

A “Huh… Guess he wasn’t wrong about the carjacking thing.”

“I turn back to Fang.”

“Whose currently writing her name on the bag of tenders.”

F “Mine.”

A “Fang you can’t hog-”

F “*hiss*”

A “Did you just hiss at me?!”

F “Mine.”

“We ended up watching Top Spear until midnight while Fang hogged her bag of
nuggies.”

“...”

“I was ready for an uneventful day of school.”

“In fact I’d be extremely happy if it was.”

“This entire week has been the most dramatic in my life.”

“Even the walk to school was dramatic, with Fang escorting me as if she was Secret
Service.”

“In English class I’m still trying to catch up with the rest of the class.”
“In any other class I’d have been caught up, but Mr. Tsuki is an absolute slave
driver.”

“My phone buzzes, and I try to tell myself it’s not worth getting distracted.”

“The next question is on Serif’s history, however, and I decide it’s not worth it.”

“Fang: Ughh”

“Fang: Pleeeease tell me your morning is going better than mine”

“Anon: could be better, why?”

“Fang: I didnt even think of Trish”

“Fang: She hasnt seen me in two days and is trying to bother me with band stuff”

“Fang: Shes reeeaaaally not taking me taking a break well”

“Anon: oh. you serious about quitting music and all that?”

“Fang: What :V”

“Fang: Why would I quit music”

“Fang: Just taking off from the band for a while”

“Anon: ah.”

“Fang: Think Trish gets the memo now”

“Fang: Apparently cold shoulder works wonders on her :V”

“Anon: you think that’ll work for long?”

“Fang: No lol”

“Fang: Will have to make distance at lunch”

“Fang: Lets eat on the roof or something”


“Anon: good idea”

“She doesn’t respond further so I turn my attention back to the assignment.”

“ ‘{i}Serif fonts can be broadly classified into one of four subgroups: old style,
transitional, Didone and slab serif, in order of fir-{/i}-’ Nope.”

“Nope, just writing a review of BIIC here.”

“(I passed the assignment.)”

“After a torturous science period where Fang poked my bruises whenever she got
bored lunch came around.”

“Fang and I got plates of country fried steak and start heading up the stairs,
chattering about possibly seeing a movie this weekend.”

F “-seemed like a Kong fan.”

A “Did Naser say that?”

F “Maybe… But c’mon, it looked like it’d be a great movie.”

“Before I can retort I hear footsteps rushing in from behind.”

T “Fang! I thought we’d be hanging out in the auditorium. Y’know, like usual?”

“Fang doesn’t even bat an eye and continues up the steps.”

“Trish follows even as Fang starts taking the steps two at a time.”

T “Fang! C’mon!”

“If the door was still there I’m pretty sure Fang would’ve kicked it open.”

“Instead she quickly turns with a huff and starts to scale the ladder one-handed.”

“Before Trish can climb it I pull myself up the ladder awkwardly.”


“Each step up a rung I need to pause, the rough movements causing bouts of pain
across my chest.”

“Trish growls as I take my time climbing up. Halfway up I’m able to hand Fang my
tray of food and scale the ladder at a slightly faster snail’s pace.”

“Once I’m at the top I swing my legs onto the ladder, blocking Trish from climbing
up too.”

T “Asshole! Let me talk with Fang!”

A “Know any theaters with easily accessible fire exits?”

F “You kidding, of course I do.”

A “Sweet, saves me some money.”

T “Anon I swear to fuck!”

-- A “Ew no I have standards, god.”

T “Fang, please! Just say something!”

“I can tell Fang is getting annoyed at Trish not taking the hint.”

F “Trish, I just don’t want to see you right now, okay?”

T “But… why?! I’m your best friend!”

F “I still need some time away after what you did.”

T “What about Reed? What about VVURM DRAMA? We can’t perform with just the two of
us!”

F “I think you should leave, Trish.”

T “I think you aren’t thinking straight!”

T “We {i}need{/i} you to come back to-”

F “Trish.”

“Her voice is a calm fury, cold and collected and bitter.”


F “I am trying to have lunch.”

F “With my boyfriend.”

F “That you just humiliated in front of everyone barely two days ago.”

F “I am perfectly capable of deciding for myself if I want to take a break.”

F “If and when I want to get back into the band, I will talk to you.”

F “For now, all you’re doing is pissing me off and ruining our lunch together.”

F “Leave.”

“Trish’s jaw hangs open, a barely audible squeak of protest escaping her.”

“She wipes a tear away with her jacket sleeve and shimmies down the ladder.”

T “... Sorry.”

“Fang waits until her footsteps quiet before letting out a sigh.”

F “... That hurt.”

“Fang’s hand finds mine and grasps it.”

“Her grip is feather light, and I can feel her shuddering breath as a shiver in her
palm.”

“I offer her silent reassurance, my fingers curling around her hand softly.”

F “Anon, do you think I fucked up?”

“I consider for a moment.”

“While Trish did mess up, big time, she’s still Fang’s best friend.”

“It wasn’t all malicious. Just… Misguided.”


“Maybe some time apart will help both Fang and Trish.”

“Maybe… but y’know…”

“I know you can hear this, though.”

“Fang simply rolls her eyes.”

F “Such a dweeb.”

A “Yep.”

“She held my hand the entirety of lunch.”

“Which was nice.”

“But it made eating my mediocre steak fucking difficult.”

“...”

12. Announcement
12A. Announcing a Plan

“April first.”

“Fang and I have been together for a month now.”

“And right now I’m gonna win our prank war.”

“She may have gotten me with that stupid kiss prank.”

“How the hell she found a mouse trap that small I’ll never know.”

“But I got her a special Pachy treat for her today.”

“For once I can use my weebiness for the greater good.”

A “Hey Sweet Tooth.”

“Fang groans at the pet name. Honestly that hurt me to say too.”
“I considered using her mom’s pet name but after the last time, I didn’t want to
tempt her.”

“Phase one complete, she’s too distracted to check the box in my hand.”

A “Wanna play the pocky game?”

F “How do you play that?”

A “Well, I hold one of these,”

“I take one of the green sugary sticks from the box and hold the plain end by my
teeth.”

A “bhetween mah teef. Den joo haff too take it wiff yer lips.”

A “an’ try an’ bite as ‘uch as joo can wiffout touchin’ my fashe.”

“Fang narrows her eyes in suspicion, and then cautiously moves her head towards
mine.”

A “It’sh jush shocola’e!”

“She moves in and crunches down on the pocky stick centimeters from my face.”

“Jackpot.”

“Her face contorts almost immediately and she spits it out on the floor.”

F “...What the fuck is that?! Where did you even get those?”

“I barely contain my laugh as Fang downs the rest of her coffee to get the taste
out of her mouth.”

A “Let’s just say Stella gets all sorts of weird snacks from Japan.”

A “...Like wasabi pocky sticks.”

--F “WHY YOU LITTLE…!”

“Fang looks ready to strangle me but I still have one card left to play.”

--A “You’ve activated my trap card, you third rate duelist with a fourth rate
deck!”
A “Hey, I have amnesty for today, April Fools! Payback for the mousetrap from the
other day."

-- “I default dance and then dab on her to assert my superiority.”

“She growls at that and jabs me in the shoulder. I guess I deserve that much.”

“Before I can make my retort, an announcement comes in over the speakers.”

--Sp “LAAAAAADIIIEEEES AND GEEEEEENTLEMEN!”

Sp “ALRIGHT EVERYONE LISTEN UP!”

Sp “NEXT MONTH! WILL BE WHAT IS POSSIBLY THE HIGHLIGHT OF YOUR TIME HERE AT VOLCANO
HIGH!”

Sp “PROM! THAT’S RIGHT I SAID IT! TOMORROW WE WILL BE SELLING FUCKING TICKETS TO
PROM!”

Sp “SO GET THOSE FORMAL FUCKING OUTFITS READY!”

“The P.A. system’s ending chime ushers in a moment of complete silence.”

“Then, all at once the chatter starts.”

??? “Ohmanohmanohman, I gotta ask him to go with-”

??? “-I even have a dress good enough for-”

??? “-tickets are pretty expensive, I’ll pass this-”

“Everyone seems excited about the sudden news.”

-- “I just wanna stay home and play vidya.”

“Prom, huh…”

“I guess I wouldn’t mind going if it’s with Fang.”

“What would she wear?”


“Actually, scratch that, what would I wear?”

“I can’t afford a decent outfit… Maybe I’ll mail home and ask Dad for his old
suit.”

“Couples tickets are like a hundred bucks, too.”

“I’m sure I could make it work if I needed to.”

A “Hey Fa-”

Fernsworth “Settle down students!”

Fernsworth “There will be plenty of time to scheme your night of debauchery later!”

Fernsworth “We still have the lesson to get through, finish this and then chatter
all you need.”

“The class collectively throws their heads back to groan.”

Fernsworth “Oh, fiddlesticks. It’s only two pages of particle physics.”

F “You have a spare railgun in your backpack?”

“Professor Fernsworth passes out the assignment and returns to his desk for a quick
nap.”

“Particle physics isn’t too hard, more tedious than anything.”

“I should finish pretty quickly unless something comes up.”

F “Anon, remind me, what’s a quark again?”

“Oh right.”

“Lab partners.”

“...”
“I help Fang through the first few questions until she says she has a good grasp on
the concept.”

“Eventually I’m able to focus on my own work again, making steady progress through
the remaining problems.”

“My mind wanders back to the idea of going to prom.”

“I honestly don’t feel like going.”

“Maybe Fang will feel the same about skipping prom and just going to the beach or
something.”

-- Replace ‘the beach’ with ‘snurch’.

A “Hey Fang. Do-”

“Something’s off with Fang, she’s gazing vacantly into space.”

“Her worksheet lies untouched in front of her.”

A “... Fang?”

-- “I snap my fingers in front of her snoot a couple of times to get her


attention.”

F “... I’ve decided.”

A “Huh?”

F “VVURM DRAMA has to play for the school at prom.”

F “It’s the only way that everyone will finally see our talent.”

A “Wait, your band? But I thought you broke off last mon-”

F “Oh, don’t worry about that.”

F “Trish called with the idea last night and I apologized!”

A “I-wait, you apologized?”


F “Thinking about it again, leaving the band was something of an overreaction on my
part.”

A “Overreaction? But she-”

F “Trish has been my friend for a long time, and I shouldn’t have been so harsh on
her.”

A “Uh… ye-”

F “So the band’s back together!”

F “Isn’t that great!?”

A “I-I, uh, sure?”

F “So you’ll go to prom to help us play, right?”

“So much for avoiding it. Fuck me.”

A “Guess I don’t have much of a choice.”

A “You sure about Trish though?”

A “She proba-”

F “Oh, you can apologize to her at lunch today.”

A “Wh-buh… What?!”

A “Why in the seven fucks would I apologize to her?”

A “The janitors have stopped washing my locker since it just gets more dicks drawn
on it every day!”

A “There’s more dicks on my locker than in a pride parade for fucks sake!”

-- A “Even the Japanese transfer student got in on it, he keeps writing “ochinchin
wa daisuki nan dayo!”, whatever the fuck that means!”
F “It’s easier than just letting it boil, right?”

F “You should be more willing to forgive people.”

F “Come on, we both have limited friend groups.”

F “We can’t afford to burn bridges when we can just accept things, right?”

“...”

“When she puts it like that…”

A “I… Whatever. Fine.”

“But how she put it.”

“Maybe it’s just me, but she seems a little…”

“Frantic.”

F “Ohh, thank you so much Anon!”

F “I’ll start looking for a good suit to wear!”

“Fang yanks her phone out and starts looking through an online catalogue of
androgynous formal wear.”

“Well, this can’t be a good sign.”

“Highlight of our time here at Volcano High indeed.”

“...”

12B. Announcing Nothing Important

“April first.”

“Fang and I have been together for a month now.”

“And right now I’m gonna win our prank war.”


“She may have gotten me with that stupid kiss prank.”

“How the hell she found a mouse trap that small I’ll never know.”

“But I got her a special Pachy treat for her today.”

“For once I can use my weebiness for the greater good.”

A “Hey Sweet Tooth.”

“Fang groans at the pet name. Honestly that hurt me to say too.”

“I considered using her mom’s pet name but after the last time, I didn’t want to
tempt her.”

“Phase one complete, she’s too distracted to check the box in my hand.”

A “Wanna play the pocky game?”

F “How do you play that?”

A “Well, I hold one of these,”

“I take one of the green sugary sticks from the box and hold the plain end by my
teeth.”

A “bhetween mah teef. Den joo haff too take it wiff yer lips.”

A “an’ try an’ bite as ‘uch as joo can wiffout touchin’ my fashe.”

“Fang narrows her eyes in suspicion, and then cautiously moves her head towards
mine.”

A “It’sh jush shocola’e!”

“She moves in and crunches down on the pocky stick centimeters from my face.”

“Jackpot.”

“Her face contorts almost immediately and she spits it out on the floor.”

F “...What the fuck is that?! Where did you even get those?”
“I barely contain my laugh as Fang downs the rest of her coffee to get the taste
out of her mouth.”

A “Let’s just say Stella gets all sorts of weird snacks from Japan.”

A “...Like wasabi pocky sticks.”

--F “WHY YOU LITTLE…!”

“Fang looks ready to strangle me but I still have one card left to play.”

--A “You’ve activated my trap card, you third rate duelist with a fourth rate
deck!”

A “Hey, I have amnesty for today, April Fools! Payback for the mousetrap from the
other day."

-- “I default dance and then dab on her to assert my superiority.”

“She growls at that and jabs me in the shoulder. I guess I deserve that much.”

“Before I can make my retort, an announcement comes in over the speakers.”

--Sp “LAAAAAADIIIEEEES AND GEEEEEENTLEMEN!”

Sp “ALRIGHT EVERYONE LISTEN UP!”

Sp “NEXT MONTH! WILL BE WHAT IS POSSIBLY THE HIGHLIGHT OF YOUR TIME HERE AT VOLCANO
HIGH!”

Sp “PROM! THAT’S RIGHT I SAID IT! TOMORROW WE WILL BE SELLING FUCKING TICKETS TO
PROM!”

Sp “SO GET THOSE FORMAL FUCKING OUTFITS READY!”

“The P.A. system’s ending chime ushers in a moment of complete silence.”

“Then, all at once the chatter starts.”

??? “Ohmanohmanohman, I gotta ask him to go with-”

??? “-I even have a dress good enough for-”


??? “-tickets are pretty expensive, I’ll pass this-”

“Everyone seems excited about the sudden news.”

-- “I just wanna stay home and play vidya.”

“Prom, huh…”

“I guess I wouldn’t mind going if it’s with Fang.”

“What would she wear?”

“Actually, scratch that, what would I wear?”

“I can’t afford a decent outfit… Maybe I’ll mail home and ask Dad for his old
suit.”

“Couples tickets are like a hundred bucks, too.”

“I’m sure I could make it work if I needed to.”

A “Hey Fa-”

Fernsworth “Settle down students!”

Fernsworth “There will be plenty of time to scheme your night of debauchery later!”

Fernsworth “We still have the lesson to get through, finish this and then chatter
all you need.”

“The class collectively throws their heads back to groan.”

Fernsworth “Oh, fiddlesticks. It’s only two pages of particle physics.”

F “You have a spare railgun in your backpack?”

“Professor Fernsworth passes out the assignment and returns to his desk for a quick
nap.”

“Particle physics isn’t too hard, more tedious than anything.”


“I should finish pretty quickly unless something comes up.”

F “Anon, remind me, what’s a quark again?”

“Oh right.”

“Lab partners.”

“...”

“About fifteen minutes into the assignment, the two of us are just about done.”

“We’re making surprisingly good time.”

F “Uhm… and you said that the electrons hold the negative charge, right?”

A “Yeah, yeah.”

F “Can’t imagine when I’d be using this crap in real life.”

A “You never know, you might shrink one day.”

F “Yeah, and you might stop pretending you’re livestreaming on Yousnoot.”

A “As far as you know I might be giving you incorrect answers, you know.”

F “Mhm, sure.”

“The teacher is making his rounds checking on the students and gets to our desks.”

Fernsworth “Hello, Anon. Fang.”

Fernsworth “Are you two getting along well?

A/F “Yes, Mister Fernsworth.”

Fernsworth “Great to hear.”


Fernsworth “You know, I’m real proud of you two.”

Fernsworth “I remember at the start of the year you were at each other's' throats.”

Fernsworth “And now look at you!”

“The two of us cringe.”

A “Uhh… Yeah, thanks.”

Fernsworth “At any rate, you two understand the material, right?”

A “Oh yeah, Fang and I are fine.”

A “I was just helping them with a few problems.”

“Phew, remembered it this time.”

Fernsworth “Good, good.”

Fernsworth “I won’t keep you any longer then.”

“Fernsworth meanders to pester the next few students.”

A “Anyways, where were we?”

“I turn back to see Fang giving me a raised eyebrow and a smug grin.”

F “So…”

A “Hm?”

“Fang’s eyebrows rise and fall faster and faster.”

“As if she’s trying to send a message in morse code.”

“Wait wha-”

F “Heh. See, you can learn, Anon.”


“Oh.”

“OH!”

“Oh god she’s still on about that?!”

“...She does seem pretty serious about it.”

“We’ve been friends long enough…”

“I guess it’s the least I can do to start going along with it.”

F “I didn’t realize you were Pan, Anon.”

A “Pan? Wait, what does a Raptor William’s movie have to do with this?”

F “No, dummy! You’re Pansexual!”

A “I’m sorry, what?”

F “You’re Pan!”

F “That means you’re willing to date people regardless of identity!”

“Do I come off as that desperate…?”

F “I’m an enbie, you recognize me, we’re dating, therefore you are Pan!”

“Fang deserves a gold medal at the mental gymnastic olympics.”

“Even the French would give that routine a ten outta ten.”

“Aaaaanyways….”

F “Mumblin’ again.”

A “...Prom! You uh.. Wanna actually like… go? Together?”

“Ugh, which is worse, the panny stuff or prom?”


F “mmmm… naaaaah.”

F “Prom is like… so lame, ya know?”

A “O-oh. Yeah, I get ya. Not to mention a waste of money.”

F “Yeah. Money better spent on actual good stuff.”

A “Like carfe?”

“In the distance I can hear Reed rebuffing my attempt to try his product.”

F “Yeah. And booze.”

A “Yeah totally. Like, prom cash is way better spent on fun stuff like liquor.”

F “In fact, we totally should.”

A “Should what?”

F “Have our own prom! Just the two of us! With booze!”

“I consider the idea for a moment.”

“Just Fang, me and a few dozen cans of beer somewhere.”

A “Fuck yeah!”

F “Fuck yeah!”

Fernsworth “Quiet down, you in the back.”

A “Oops.”

A “Crap, the assignment!”

F “You’re still worried about that?”

“I flip the page over to reveal the second half, which we only have about ten
minutes to finish.”

F “It’s just the one assignment, and there’s already no way you can finish, right?”

F “Just relax, take a break now and then.”

“I worriedly glance at the page again.”

“Maybe she’s... they’re right.”

A “Alright, sure.”

“The two of us continue making plans up to the bell, and I toss the paper out when
I leave.”

“...”

12C. Announcing a Date

“April first.”

“Fang and I have been together for a month now.”

“Things are going pretty well. When we discount Trish’s weekly attempt to talk with
Fang.”

“Rosa and Stella have helped with that.”

“In fact they’ve done a lot for our relationship.”

“Between distracting Trish and giving us a space to just be together on the


weekends away from everyone.”

“Only downside to it is all the fucking gardening we have to do during our alone
time.”

“Still, things are good.”

“And right now I’m gonna win our prank war.”


“She may have gotten me with that stupid kiss prank.”

“How the hell she found a mouse trap that small I’ll never know.”

“But I got her a special Pachy treat for her today.”

“For once I can use my weebiness for the greater good.”

A “Hey Sweet Tooth.”

“Fang groans at the pet name. Honestly that hurt me to say too.”

“I considered using her mom’s pet name but after the last time, I didn’t want to
tempt her.”

“Phase one complete, she’s too distracted to check the box in my hand.”

A “Wanna play the pocky game?”

F “How do you play that?”

A “Well, I hold one of these,”

“I take one of the green sugary sticks from the box and hold the plain end by my
teeth.”

A “bhetween mah teef. Den joo haff too take it wiff yer lips.”

A “an’ try an’ bite as ‘uch as joo can wiffout touchin’ my fashe.”

“Fang narrows her eyes in suspicion, and then cautiously moves her head towards
mine.”

A “It’sh jush shocola’e!”

“She moves in and crunches down on the pocky stick centimeters from my face.”

“Jackpot.”

“Her face contorts almost immediately and she spits it out on the floor.”

F “...What the fuck is that?! Where did you even get those?”
“I barely contain my laugh as Fang downs the rest of her coffee to get the taste
out of her mouth.”

A “Let’s just say Stella gets all sorts of weird snacks from Japan.”

A “...Like wasabi pocky sticks.”

--F “WHY YOU LITTLE…!”

“Fang looks ready to strangle me but I still have one card left to play.”

--A “You’ve activated my trap card, you third rate duelist with a fourth rate
deck!”

A “Hey, I have amnesty for today, April Fools! Payback for the mousetrap from the
other day."

-- “I default dance and then dab on her to assert my superiority.”

“She growls at that and jabs me in the shoulder. I guess I deserve that much.”

“Before I can make my retort, an announcement comes in over the speakers.”

--Sp “LAAAAAADIIIEEEES AND GEEEEEENTLEMEN!”

Sp “ALRIGHT EVERYONE LISTEN UP!”

Sp “NEXT MONTH! WILL BE WHAT IS POSSIBLY THE HIGHLIGHT OF YOUR TIME HERE AT VOLCANO
HIGH!”

Sp “PROM! THAT’S RIGHT I SAID IT! TOMORROW WE WILL BE SELLING FUCKING TICKETS TO
PROM!”

Sp “SO GET THOSE FORMAL FUCKING OUTFITS READY!”

“The P.A. system’s ending chime ushers in a moment of complete silence.”

“Then, all at once the chatter starts.”

??? “Ohmanohmanohman, I gotta ask him to go with-”

??? “-I even have a dress good enough for-”


??? “-tickets are pretty expensive, I’ll pass this-”

“Everyone seems excited about the sudden news.”

-- “I just wanna stay home and play vidya.”

“Prom, huh…”

“I guess I wouldn’t mind going if it’s with Fang.”

“What would she wear?”

“Actually, scratch that, what would I wear?”

“I can’t afford a decent outfit… Maybe I’ll mail home and ask Dad for his old
suit.”

“Couples tickets are like a hundred bucks, too.”

“I’m sure I could make it work if I needed to.”

A “Hey Fa-”

Fernsworth “Settle down students!”

Fernsworth “There will be plenty of time to scheme your night of debauchery later!”

Fernsworth “We still have the lesson to get through, finish this and then chatter
all you need.”

“The class collectively throws their heads back to groan.”

Fernsworth “Oh, fiddlesticks. It’s only two pages of particle physics.”

F “You have a spare railgun in your backpack?”

“Professor Fernsworth passes out the assignment and returns to his desk for a quick
nap.”

“Particle physics isn’t too hard, more tedious than anything.”


“I should finish pretty quickly unless something comes up.”

F “Anon, remind me, what’s a quark again?”

“Oh right.”

“Lab partners.”

“About fifteen minutes into the assignment, the two of us are just about done.”

“We’re making surprisingly good time.”

F “Uhm… and you said that the electrons hold the negative charge, right?”

A “Yeah, yeah.”

F “Can’t imagine when I’d be using this crap in real life.”

A “You never know, you might shrink one day.”

F “Yeah, and you might stop pretending you’re livestreaming on Yousnoot.”

A “As far as you know I might be giving you incorrect answers, you know.”

F “Mhm, sure.”

“The teacher is making his rounds checking on the students and gets to our desks.”

Fernsworth “Hello, Anon. Fang.”

Fernsworth “Are you two getting along well?

A/F “Yes, Mister Fernsworth.”

Fernsworth “Great to hear.”

Fernsworth “You know, I’m real proud of you two.”


Fernsworth “I remember at the start of the year you were at each other's' throats.”

Fernsworth “And now look at you!”

A “Uhh… Yeah, thanks.”

Fernsworth “At any rate, you two understand the material, right?”

A “Oh yeah, Fang and I are fine.”

A “I was just helping them with a few problems.”

“Phew, remembered it this time.”

Fernsworth “Good, good.”

Fernsworth “I won’t keep you any longer then.”

“Fernsworth meanders to pester the next few students.”

A “Anyways, where were we?”

“Turning back to Fang, her hands are trying to cover her face.”

“Except the frown that’s impossible to hide with her long beak.”

A “Fang? You okay?”

“A painful sigh escapes her as she begins to shake her head.”

F "Yeah. I'm good. Just, was reminded of something embarrassing."

A “What?”

F “Trish.”

A "Trish?"
F "I can't help it, I see her everyday. We tried signing up to as many classes
together as we could and now I regret it."

F “And every time I do I’m reminded of… this whole thing.”

A “I’m not good at the pronoun game, Fang. What whole thing?”

F “THAT, the pronoun thing!”

F "Now things are… different.”

F “And, I wish I hung out with Naser more than..."

F "...her."

"There's some disdain in the way she said it."

"Now that they mentioned it, Trish has been very weird lately."

"Should I mention to Fang the fact that every day in Math period I try to check if
there's a bomb under my seat?"

F "you're the one I see the least. It's such a shame."

"Fang started stroking my hand on the table."

F “Now though…”

F “I’ve been thinking and…”

F “And… I wouldn’t mind...”

F “Wouldn’t mind if you called me Lucy.”

F “I… I’d like it, in fact.”

A “I… A-are you sure?”

F “Mhm.”

“There’s a fragility to her voice. A stiffness in her nod.”


“But if Fa-”

“If Lucy would like it then…”

A “Alright then... Lucy.”

“She blushes again and looks away.”

“I test her name a couple times. It’s a nice name. Really sweet. But...”

“Fang fits her more in my mind.”

F “Only you, though.”

F “I don’t know if I’m comfortable with anyone else saying it yet.”

A “I-I see.”

A “Thank you for sharing that with me.”

“Now both of us are blushing.”

“...Well, if we’re already in the moment, I may as well ask.”

A “A-anyways, Flucy.”

F “Don’t stress yourself over it.”

A “Right, right.”

A “Anyways, uhh.”

A “Prom, right?”

“Fang’s amber eyes zero in on mine.”

“Her pleading gaze bores through to my soul and I feel the unstoppable urge to
comfort her in any way possible.”
A “... You uhh, wanna go with me?”

“I watch as Lucy’s face slowly grows redder and redder.”

“Her lips turn from a thin line to an impressively massive grin.”

“She tries to cover up her face with her hands.”

“When that fails to hide her growing excitement her wings engulf her upper body.”

“A squeal of elation penetrates the feathered cage, accompanied by the staccato


beat of boots stomping rapidly on the ground.”

“Once the sounds of jubilation die down Lucy lowers her wings.”

“She takes a calming breath and shrugs nonchalantly.”

F “Sure, could be cool.”

“The whole class is snickering and I have to fight back my own.”

“Sadly it was a foe far greater than I.”

A “Pfffftttahahahaha.”

F “Up the shut fuck.”

F “You’re my date. I’m allowed to be happy.”

“While her voice was petulant there was an underlying tone of cheer in it.”

“I reassured Lucy with a smile, which she responded by lowering her wings until
they folded neatly behind her.”

A “Yeah. Though I should warn you that I can’t dance for shit. Your feet have been
warned.”

F “That’s fine.”

F “I’ll just step on your feet instead.”


“Crap, I need a suit.”

F “You’re mumbling again. And uhmm.”

F “I could ask Naser for his old one.”

A “I was thinking something like that, but I’ll probably just ask my dad for his
old tux.”

A “His is tailored for humans, after all.”

A “Be pretty silly to be walking around all night with the wingholes exposing my
undershirt.”

F “That’d be pretty silly, yeah.”

F “And then there’s the tail.”

A “Oh god no.”

A “But yeah, my dad’s suit would work nice, even if it’s a bit old.”

A “He used to tell me about the parties he went to when he was about my age.”

F “Sounds like he was a lot of fun.”

A “Anyways, you got anything to wear?”

F “My mom’s already probably bought the “perfect outfit” for me.”

A “But the announcement for prom was just earlier this period.”

F “And?”

A “Sounds like it’s a date, then.”

“Fang’s smile is cherubic.”

“And before I can fully memorize it,”


“*DING-DONG, BING-BONG*”

A “Crap, the assignment.”

F “We were mostly done with it anyways.”

“I look at our mostly done sheet.”

“Flipping it over, the backside has twice the questions and four times the blank
spots.”

F “M-mostly half way?”

“I simply sigh and drop the sheet.”

A “Finish it at my place?”

F “Sounds like a second date.”

“...”

“Later at my hovel of a home…”

A "Almost finished."

F "I wish I could get some help for the other periods, this took way too long."

F "Fuck, man. Trish keeps staring at me during class expecting me to talk to her, I
gotta avoid Reed and Stella now because they're always around her too, it's
agonizing!

F "I keep having these dreams where she mans up and I'm forced to talk to her
again! They feel more like nightmares now!"

F "Rosa is too busy to help - with the exercises, I mean - but I hope the camping
trip will be fun."

A "Well it's done. All of it."

F "Thanks, Anon. You're a pretty cool guy."


A "No problem, I just like helping you, I guess."

F "...and without asking for anything in return."

F "..."

F "You're so good to me."

A "Thanks. F- Lucy."

F "Is there nothing you really want from me?"

A "You mean repay? I don't know, things are too good now, though."

F "More naps?"

F "or perhaps hugs?"

F "Hand holding?"

"I'm sweating profusely."

F "Or maybe...a kiss?"

A "Kiss? With that huge snoot?"

F "Why? Are you afraid? Have you never kissed a dinosaur before?"

A "No?"

F "Not even a human girl?"

A "Uhhh..."

F "So I'm your first? That's exciting."

A "This is so weird, I don't know how I'm feeling right now. Don't you feel weird
too?"
F "I've kissed shorter snouts, yours can't be that different."

F "Uh...look Anon, if it doesn't work out..."

F "...It won't change anything. Right?"

A "Promise?"

F "Of course I promise! Get over here you fucking pussy!"

A "O-okay."

F "I won't bite, though I've never had human before..."

A "Okay, here it goes..."

“...”

A “Well?

F “T-that’s just the lips!”

“...”

F “T-the tongue, come on.”

“...”

F “What are you doing?!”

A “Your mouth hinges way back, I have to hang my jaw.”

F “Don’t do that, it’s stupid!”

A “Wait, {i}you{/i} open wide now.”

F “That’s even sillier.”

“...”
F “*glug* *hack* *urk*”

A “Oh god how long is your tongue?! I think I almost threw up.”

F “*cough* Oh god *cough* I think I reached your tonsils! *hurk*”

A “Shit sorry sorry sorr-”

F “No no. It’s fine. Let me think.”

F “Let’s try the other one again.”

A “O-okay…”

“...”

F “Don’t open as *mnph*... wide.”

“...”

F “Wait…”

“...”

F “Tilt to the side… like this.”

“...”

“...”

“...”

A “I don’t know… I’ll probably never get the hang of this.”

F “Really? I uh… think it was… nice.”

A “Wait seriously?”

F “Y-yeah. You’re not a *bad* kisser.”


A “Bullshit.”

F “Seriously, here.”

“...”

“...”

F “Don’t be shy now…”

A “Lucy.”

“...”

F “See? Getting better.”

A “Mmm…”

F “I can feel your heart beating. It’s so loud.”

A “Y-yeah, same.”

“...”

12D. Announcing a Show


“April first.”

“Fang and I have been together for a month now.”

“And right now I’m gonna win our prank war.”

“She may have gotten me with that stupid kiss prank.”

“How the hell she found a mouse trap that small I’ll never know.”

“But I got her a special Pachy treat for her today.”

“For once I can use my weebiness for the greater good.”


A “Hey Sweet Tooth.”

“Fang groans at the pet name. Honestly that hurt me to say too.”

“I considered using her mom’s pet name but after the last time, I didn’t want to
tempt her.”

“Phase one complete, she’s too distracted to check the box in my hand.”

A “Wanna play the pocky game?”

F “How do you play that?”

A “Well, I hold one of these,”

“I take one of the green sugary sticks from the box and hold the plain end by my
teeth.”

A “bhetween mah teef. Den joo haff too take it wiff yer lips.”

A “an’ try an’ bite as ‘uch as joo can wiffout touchin’ my fashe.”

“Fang narrows her eyes in suspicion, and then cautiously moves her head towards
mine.”

A “It’sh jush shocola’e!”

“She moves in and crunches down on the pocky stick centimeters from my face.”

“Jackpot.”

“Her face contorts almost immediately and she spits it out on the floor.”

F “...What the fuck is that?! Where did you even get those?”

“I barely contain my laugh as Fang downs the rest of her coffee to get the taste
out of her mouth.”

A “Let’s just say Stella gets all sorts of weird snacks from Japan.”

A “...Like wasabi pocky sticks.”

--F “WHY YOU LITTLE…!”


“Fang looks ready to strangle me but I still have one card left to play.”

--A “You’ve activated my trap card, you third rate duelist with a fourth rate
deck!”

A “Hey, I have amnesty for today, April Fools! Payback for the mousetrap from the
other day."

-- “I default dance and then dab on her to assert my superiority.”

“She growls at that and jabs me in the shoulder. I guess I deserve that much.”

“Before I can make my retort, an announcement comes in over the speakers.”

--Sp “LAAAAAADIIIEEEES AND GEEEEEENTLEMEN!”

Sp “ALRIGHT EVERYONE LISTEN UP!”

Sp “NEXT MONTH! WILL BE WHAT IS POSSIBLY THE HIGHLIGHT OF YOUR TIME HERE AT VOLCANO
HIGH!”

Sp “PROM! THAT’S RIGHT I SAID IT! TOMORROW WE WILL BE SELLING FUCKING TICKETS TO
PROM!”

Sp “SO GET THOSE FORMAL FUCKING OUTFITS READY!”

“The P.A. system’s ending chime ushers in a moment of complete silence.”

“Then, all at once the chatter starts.”

??? “Ohmanohmanohman, I gotta ask him to go with-”

??? “-I even have a dress good enough for-”

??? “-tickets are pretty expensive, I’ll pass this-”

“Everyone seems excited about the sudden news.”

-- “I just wanna stay home and play vidya.”

“Prom, huh…”
“I guess I wouldn’t mind going if it’s with Fang.”

“What would she wear?”

“Actually, scratch that, what would I wear?”

“I can’t afford a decent outfit… Maybe I’ll mail home and ask Dad for his old
suit.”

“Couples tickets are like a hundred bucks, too.”

“I’m sure I could make it work if I needed to.”

A “Hey Fa-”

Fernsworth “Settle down students!”

Fernsworth “There will be plenty of time to scheme your night of debauchery later!”

Fernsworth “We still have the lesson to get through, finish this and then chatter
all you need.”

“The class collectively throws their heads back to groan.”

Fernsworth “Oh, fiddlesticks. It’s only two pages of particle physics.”

F “You have a spare railgun in your backpack?”

“Professor Fernsworth passes out the assignment and returns to his desk for a quick
nap.”

“Particle physics isn’t too hard, more tedious than anything.”

“I should finish pretty quickly unless something comes up.”

F “Anon, remind me, what’s a quark again?”

“Oh right.”

“Lab partners.”
“...”

“About fifteen minutes into the assignment, the two of us are just about done.”

“We’re making surprisingly good time.”

F “Uhm… and you said that the electrons hold the negative charge, right?”

A “Yeah, yeah.”

F “Can’t imagine when I’d be using this crap in real life.”

A “You never know, you might shrink one day.”

F “Yeah, and you might stop pretending you’re livestreaming on Yousnoot.”

A “As far as you know I might be giving you incorrect answers, you know.”

F “Mhm, sure.”

“The teacher is making his rounds checking on the students and gets to our desks.”

Fernsworth “Hello, Anon. Fang.”

Fernsworth “Are you two getting along well?

A/F “Yes, Mister Fernsworth.”

Fernsworth “Great to hear.”

Fernsworth “You know, I’m real proud of you two.”

Fernsworth “I remember at the start of the year you were at each other's' throats.”

Fernsworth “And now look at you!”


“The two of us cringe.”

A “Uhh… Yeah, thanks.”

Fernsworth “At any rate, you two understand the material, right?”

A “Oh yeah, Fang and I are fine.”

A “I was just helping them with a few problems.”

“Phew, remembered it this time.”

Fernsworth “Good, good.”

Fernsworth “I won’t keep you any longer then.”

“Fernsworth meanders to pester the next few students.”

A “Anyways, where were we?”

“I turn back to Fang and her mischievous grin.”

A “What?”

“Her grin only grows.”

A “What?! What’s with the look?”

“She shakes her head and covers her mouth.”

A “Uh… Why is that funny?”

F “Anon you ignorant slut.”

F “Notice something about me? Anything at all?”

A “...Why do you have feathers on your elbows anyway?”

F “Gawd! No! I’m not actually enbie, Anon.”


“What? Oh! ‘She’.”

A “Oh… Still, why do you have feathers on your elbows?”

“Fang rolls her eyes and digs her feathered elbow into my side.”

A “Alright alright, I get it.”

A “Just joking around.”

F “Shame your jokes suck.”

“We chuckle together.”

A “So, like, I can say you’re my girlfriend now?”

“Fang blushes a little.”

F “You always could. Dummy.”

--”Sugoi! Tsundere Fang kawaii desu.”

“The blush becomes contagious and I find myself looking back at the worksheet.”

-- “G-G-G-GIRLFRIEND?!”

“... Girlfriend…”

-- “Giggity”

“Suddenly I’m feeling squeamish all over again.”

“I mean, we went on dates before, but she’s never straight up said she’s my
girlfriend…”

“Now I’m on the spot.”

“It only makes sense that I ask her to prom, right?”


“Why am I getting so worked up again all of a sudden?”

“This is ridiculous, I’m just going to ask.”

-- “I pull my plastic katana from my obi as I position myself in seiza, laying the
blade beside me on my right.”

-- “Bowing forward until my head touches the ground, I prepare to take the leap of
faith.”

A “Hey, Fang, you-”

-- F “Get in, loser. We have a city to burn.”

F “We’re going to prom together, right?”

A “O-oh, yeah. Totally.”

A “I was gonna ask if you wanted to go at all.”

F “Of course I do, but do you want to go?”

A “I mean, only with you?”

F “Yes or no, dork.”

A “Yes.”

F “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

A “Like plucking feathers.”

“She playfully elbows me again.”

“I think I get the feathers on the elbow thing now, because those things fucking
dig in. Ow.”

F “Do you even have something to wear?”

A “I was going to ask my dad for his old clothes.”


F “You sure? I could ask Naser for his old stuff.”

A “Tail and wings.”

F “Right, right.”

A “What about you?”

A “You actually gonna wear a dress?

F “I’ve got this sick looking dress shirt…”

F “Naaaah, shirts suck.”

A “Wings again?”

F “Wings again. At least I can wear a backless dress.”

“I cup my chin and try to picture the dress.”

-- “How would you even put that on with those wings?”

“The heat -- confusion creeping up my face tells Fang exactly what I’m thinking.”

“I grin and nod approvingly.”

“And earn a third elbow to my side.”

A “Wait, hold on.”

A “Do you still go by Fang, at least?”

F “Why wouldn’t I?”

A “Cool, just checking.”

F “Taking it one step at a time, you know?”

F “There’s only about ten minutes left of class, are we gonna have enough time to
finish the assignment?”

A “Shit, yeah. Forgot.”

“I flip over the page to reveal the entire second half of the assignment.”

A “It’s gonna be close though.”

“Fang scoots her chair closer to me.”

F “No time to waste then, yeah?”

“Splitting the questions between us, Fang and I are able to finish the assignment
seconds before the bell.”

“Somehow.”

“We walk through the hall together, at least until we have to split to our separate
classes.”

A “Hey wait, you did the word search bit this time, right?”

A “I thought you said you were terrible at those?”

F “And you’ve believed me up to this point.”

A “I feel used.”

F “That’s because I used you.”

A “I’ll get you fo-”

Sp “Ah, Fang! There you are, a moment please.”

“We turn to see Principal Spears trailing behind us.”

F “Yes?”

Sp “Fang, I was planning on asking you during your next class, but since I found
you here…”
Sp “I’m embarrassed to say we’re missing one event slot during prom. Scheduling
error.”

Sp “And your teacher, Mr Jingo, recommended you for your musical talents.”

-- Sp “He said your exotic fan dance can distract even dinosaurs.”

Sp “I’m not asking you to make your decision right now, but if you’d consider
helping out by performing a musical number or two that would help monumentally.”

F “Oh!”

A “Fang’s going to play for the school?”

Sp “If Fang agrees to.”

F “Well, uh… Sure!”

F “Yeah, I’d love to do some songs for prom.”

Sp “Fantastic news, Fang. When you can, please swing by the office.”

Sp “And I’ll say as your principal I’m very proud of you.”

Sp “You’ve had a... rocky year to say the least, but here you are a better person
for it.”

F “Thank you, Principal Spears. I’ll come after school today.”

“Spears nods and heads off.”

F “Shit, now I really need to get a good dress.”

A “I thought you had one?”

F “A party dress isn’t a performance dress!”

F “It’s like- you know what I mean.”

A “I guess?”
A “You don’t seem as excited as last time you got somewhere to play.”

F “I know, I mean... last time I had a whole band to play with.”

A “You sure you’ll be alright playing solo?”

-- F “Actually, Anon...”

-- “She hands me a triangle and a small metal stick to bang on it with.”

-- F “Practice this. You’re in the band now. You have no choice.”

F “Probably.”

F “I’ll also need to practice a lot more…”

F “You’ll help me, right?”

A “Of course.”

A “As long as you don’t need me up on stage with you.”

F “I’m trying to keep the crowd from throwing things this time around, actually.”

A “Bite me.”

F “Speaking of. I’ll see you at lunch, right?”

A “Yeah, of course.”

“Fang pecks me on the cheek and starts down the hall to her next class.”

“I feel my lips spread into a grin. It’s kind of weird to think of it, but I’m
actually excited for prom.”

“Man, I hope dad’s --pink lycra jumpsuit suit has actually been to the cleaner, I
don’t wanna disappoint.”

“...”
13. Let’s All Go
13A. Let’s all go to the Museum

--“Dating has changed.”

--“It's no longer about romance, common interests, or emotional connection. It's an


endless series of proxy dates, using apps and websites.”

--“Dating--and it's consumption of time--has become a well-oiled machine.”

--“Dating has changed.”

--“Women use filters, and photoshop, and bullshit their profile pic. Make-up on
their face to hide how hideous they are.”

--“Genetic control, information control, emotion control, restaurant control…


everything is monitored and kept under control.”

--“Dating…has changed.”

--“The age of romance has become the age of hook-ups, all in the name of averting
catastrophe from poorly planned pregnancies, and she who controls the app, controls
history.”

--“Dating…has changed.”

--“When hook-ups are under (her) control, sex becomes routine”

“Later that night after school Fang texts me.”

“Fang: Alright i got a plan”

“Anon: a plan?”

“Fang: To make sure the concert goes off without a hitch”

“Fang: First we need to learn right from the source”

“Anon: the source?”


“Fang: Theres an old museum of fine arts doing a special exhibit on music next
week”

“Fang: Lots of stories of bands pulling through last minute right?”

“Fang: If we study from those old guys we’re guaranteed to do great!”

“Anon: is it really that simple?”

“Fang: Sure!”

“Fang: Were gonna learn how old bands did well, were gonna play our music at prom,
everyones gonna love us, and its gonna be great.”

“Anon: that’s a lot of ‘gonnas’”

“Fang: And youre gonna come with me”

“Anon: what about trish and reed?”

“Fang: Sending them to a bunch of old record shops to cover more ground”

“Fang: So itll just be the two of us”

“Anon: sounds like a plan.”

“Fang: Meet me at the galleria at three alright?”

“Anon: i’ll be there.”

“I put my phone down and look around my room.”

“Do you need to dress special to go to museums…?”

“Even if you did, best I can do right now is this dirty dress shirt and slacks with
weird stains. -- this pink lycra jumpsuit.”

“... Not sure if that would be good enough.”

“It’s probably fine, I shouldn’t be getting so worked up.”


“I get to spend the whole day with Fang, after all.”

“...”

“The fine art museum turns out to be a relatively modern building right in the
middle of the galleria.”

“Exactly the last kind of place I would expect Fang to be seen at.”

“I almost regret my decision not to wear my dirty dress clothes before seeing Fang
already waiting for me by the entrance.”

“Seeing me approach, she drops her cigarette and grinds the butt to ash under her
heel.”

F “Took you long enough.”

-- “I stop three feet in front of her and combat roll.”

-- “Plon, plon, plon.”

“Here’s your one chance Anon don’t fuck it up.”

A “Kept you waiting, huh?”

F “God, you’re such a dork. C’mon, the music exhibit is inside.”

“Thankfully admission to the museum was free.”

“She leads me by the hand through the front doors, and I immediately feel the
temperature fall at least ten degrees.”

“Are museums always this cold?”

“The music exhibit is all the way in the back of the museum, past several rooms of
abstract modern art.”

-- “There is an epic picture of a dinosaur kicking a fan though, wonder who that
is.”

F “What a bunch of junk.”

A “What, you don’t want to buy a painting made with dino egg yolks and whites for
ten million?”

F “What a steal!”
A “What about a sheet of paper with an url to a picture of a fridge for fifty
grand?”

F “You’re messing with me.”

A “It’s true, I’ll show you when we get out of here.”

“We reach the exhibit hall with the big words ‘THE STYGY MOLDRIX EXPERIENCE’
hanging over the door.”

“Despite it being a limited time event on the life and times of a famous musician,
there’s only a few dozen people here.”

F “Finally!”

F “Alright, Anon, get ready to take notes!”

A “Notes…?”

“Fang grabs me by the forearm and rushes the two of us into the exhibit.”

“Once inside, she gives me her phone.”

F “Take pictures of everything for me, okay?”

A “Dowhatnow? Uh, okay, sure…”

F “Let’s start with… Uhh…”

“She scans the room briefly before pointing giddily to a guitar hanging inside a
case.”

“Despite being several decades old, the guitar was clearly well looked after.”

“The lacquer on the wood gleamed under the spotlights and the metal didn’t have a
speck of rust on it.”

F “OH! OH! That!”

A “What is it?”
“She sprints over to the case and I have to catch up making sure I don’t drop her
phone.”

F “It’s Stygy’s famous guitar!”

F “It’s actually a right handed piece, but Stygy was left-handed but couldn’t
afford a lefty guitar, so he re-strung a regular one so he could play it.”

F “This guitar was the one he used on his last show at an informal gig in some jazz
club in London, a few days before he bit it while OD-ing on drugs.”

A “Yeah, that’s pretty cool.”

“I caught maybe half of that.”

“Either way, I snap several pictures from various angles while Fang continues her
sermon.”

-- F “Here’s his famous pot, where he cooked all his LSD!”

-- F “Ooh, ooh, a jar of his bile from when he choked to death in his sleep!”

F “Alright, what’s next?”

“She drags me along to the next display case, a few vacuum-sealed pages with
various scribblings on them.”

F “And these are some letters he hand-wrote to his father! If my dad wasn’t such an
asshole he could have pulled some strings and let us play in the precinct!”

“I try keeping up with her ramblings while taking pictures, but somewhere along the
way I lose her in the twisting corridors.”

A “Oops.”

“I stand in place looking around a bit, but she’s nowhere in sight.”

“She can’t have gone far, guess I’ll keep taking pictures of things.”

“My eyes are drawn to a monitor on the wall playing documentary footage.”

“It was a clip of Stygy playing the national anthem as a protest song or
something.”
“It sounded kinda cool, I’ll give him that much.”

F “Ooh, that’s a good find, Anon!”

“Fang’s voice makes me jump as she reappears out of nowhere.”

F “Maybe we could play something like that, show us as a champion of the common
man!”

A “...Yeah, my thoughts exactly. Glad I could help.”

F “I saw some good stuff in the next row over we can go check out. too.”

“She drags me away from the screen to whatever it is she wants to take
‘inspiration’ from.”

“I’m glad she’s having fun and all, but…”

“I wish this was more of a date than a research assignment.”

“But I guess she’d feel the same way if I bombarded her with anime.”

“She has her interests and I have mine.”

“Maybe after this I can take her to a restaurant.”

“We’re in a city, but there’s bound to be something relatively cheap nearby.”

“It’d be nice, talking about the pictures and things we’ve been taking over some
burgers.”

“It’s only four-thirty now, it’ll be about dinner time by the time we get out,
too.”

“Pretty decent timing, sounds like a good plan.”

“Fang drags me around a few more exhibits, cataloguing the various paraphernalia
and stopping occasionally to obsess over some minor detail.”

“Eventually we loop back around to the entrance.”

“Fang looks back at the room we just came from.”

A “You about ready to go?”


F “Maybe… Just trying to think if we missed anything…”

A “I’m pretty sure we got everything, you could probably reconstruct the entire
exhibit using only these pictures I took.”

F “I guess… Just can’t have this part of the plan go wrong, you know?”

A “About that, I’m still not sure what your plan is meant to-”

F “OH WAIT!”

“She dashes off back into the room we just came in, leaving my words dangling from
my mouth.”

“While I’m gone her phone buzzes.”

“Trish: hey are you ready to meet up like you said we would :S”

“What…?”

“The text comes from Trish, but I didn’t know they were meeting later…”

“This’ll throw a huge wrench into my plan earlier…”

F “Alright, sorry, I’m back.”

A “What was that about?”

F “Sorry, had to hit up the gift shop.”

A “Oh.”

“That explains the fuck-ugly tie-dye monstrosity tide around her headcrest.”

A “You uh, got a text from Trish, I think.”

“I hand her back her phone.”

F “Oh! That’s right, I told her and Reed that we’d meet up after we were done with
everything.”
A “...I see…”

F “Right, so I’ll tell her we should meet at-”

A “Actually, Fang, hold on a second…”

F “Hm?”

A “Before we all meet together, do you want to stop by a restaurant or something,


just the two of us?”

“She thinks to herself for a moment and smiles.”

F “Of course, I dragged you along this whole time after all.”

A “Don’t worry about it.”

A “I think I can get us something from that taco truck I saw on the way in.”

F “Alright, I’ll tell Trish to wait a bit.”

“Instead of Fang dragging me through the museum, we walked out casually hand in
hand.”

“I think I saw that truck a block east from here…”

A “By the way, do you take pollo or asada or what on your taco. Please don’t say
leng-”

F “Wait!!”

“She stops dead in her tracks, head jerked to the side.”

A “Huh?”

F “Look!”

“I peer at where she’s pointing.”


“Some poster on the museum wall, it’s an advertisement for a documentary playing in
the museum’s mini theater.”

“And… It’s a documentary on Stygy Moldrix.”

F “I didn’t see this on the way in, we have to see that too!”

A “But what abou-”

F “I know, I know, I’m sorry Anon…”

“Her eyes plead with me for mercy.”

F “Just bear with me a while longer?”

“I…”

“Well, it’s not like the truck’s going anywhere, at least.”

A “... Fine. Let’s go…”

F “Oh, thank you Anon!”

A “Yeah, I know this means a lot to you.”

F “Come on, the next showing is in five minutes!”

“Already I’m being dragged back inside.”

“I guess seeing a movie with Fang isn’t the worst thing in the world.”

“...”

“Well this sucks.”

“I feel my stomach grumble for what feels like the fiftieth time, once again
regretting not even buying an overpriced bag of popcorn.”

“Stealthily as I could, I check the time on my phone before the light can distract
anyone else.”

“It’s been thirty-six minutes since the documentary started, only a few more to go
before I can escape.”
“I glance over at Fang, who has been so engrossed in the film that she hasn’t so
much as looked at me this entire time.”

“Resigning myself to my fate, my eyes return to the screen which is currently going
on about Stygy’s fourth unfinished studio album.”

“How exciting.”

“I would have just slept through it if I knew Fang wouldn’t be upset with me.”

“Not just because of how interested she is in Stygy Moldrix, but because I wouldn’t
be taking notes.”

“As the screen fades and the lights turn back on, I silently thank Raptor Jesus for
ending my forty-minute torment.”

F “That was really good! A lot of ideas for the band!”

A “Er… yeah, it was cool I guess.”

“Just please get me out of here.”

A “Now about that food truck…”

F “Oh! I told Trish and Reed that we could meet at the Galleria food court, we can
get something to eat there.”

--”*Internal screaming*”

“Really not looking forward to being anywhere near Trish but food is food I guess.”

“Part of me just wants to call the date here and go home.”

“Not that it was ever much of a date to begin with.”

A “Alright, let’s go then.”

“At least I can talk to Reed about Rock Ring or something.”

“Fang smiles and leads me back out of the museum and towards the food court.”

“I still think this is a bad idea, I’m still not over what Trish did and I doubt
her mind has changed much either.”

F “Stop being grumpy, Anon, you’re just hungry.”

“For fuck’s sake the mumbling.”

A “Fang, someone filled my locker with a shit-ton of hentai they printed out last
week. It’s not okay.”

F “That’s just some dumbass at school, we can get some food and it’ll be fine.”

“We round the corner and I immediately lock on to a certain triceratops.”


“Trish and Reed were already eating at one of the tables.”

“Fuck that.”

A “I’m gonna go get something to eat first… You want anything?”

F “Nah, I’m good. Not that hungry.”

“Extra order of fries it is.”

“I split off from Fang to find a place to get food from.”

“I glance over my shoulder to see Fang saying something and hugging Trish, both of
them turning to look over at me.”

“Trish looking significantly less enthused than Fang. No surprise there.”

“I stand in line for a Cretaceous Fried Chicken stand and order my food, savoring
every moment I wait and don’t have to interact with Trish.”

“The moment doesn’t last long and I walk over to the table, food in hand.”

“I take the seat between Fang and Reed, which puts me straight across the table
from Trish.”

“Of fucking course.”

“I place the basket of fries in front of Fang and she immediately starts digging
in. Made the right call there.”

-- “You know what they say. Dino bitches love fries.”

“Reed gives me a thumbs up, wearing a pair of giant oversized sunglasses.”

“While Trish is making a face somewhere in between judgemental and open contempt.”

T “So what took you so long? He wasn’t wasting your time again, was he, Fang?”

“Welp time to clock out of that conversation.”

“I’m sure they can have a riveting discussion without me.”

“It’s just one meal after all, I can ignore Trish for an hour and then Fang and I
can leave.”

“Digging into my basket of chicken tenders, I pull out my phone and head straight
to the armenian graphic design forum.”

“There’s another Grugsnax thread I can shitpost in to pass the time.”

“Every once in a while I look up from my phone and catch Trish giving me a death
glare before turning to look back at the others.”

“Before long my train of thought is broken by Fang saying… something.”


F “...so Anon, what do you think?”

A “Uh, yeah. That sounds good?”

F “Great! We can try Trish’s new song in the next rehearsal!”

“Trish looks smug. What did I agree to?”

T “I’m surprised you agreed to that, I would have thought you wanted us to play
some anime song instead.”

“She’s just loving this, isn’t she.”

Re “Hey man, that sounds kinda fun.”

“Reed is qualed by Trish’s sneer.”

“Know what. I don’t care anymore.”

F “Maybe… But let’s talk about that later. I’m cravin’ a milkshake right now.”

“Fang gets up and turns to a nearby smoothie booth.”

“Leaving me here.”

“To deal with this. These.”

T “So, Anon…”

“Her grin is just short of vicious.”

T “So happy you agreed to my idea.”

T “Guess you’re starting to get some good taste.”

T “Better than any of that weeb-pop trash you’ve got on your phone.”

“I pointedly ignore her. She’s trying to get a rise out of me.”

T “Maybe I’ll make a somebody out of you too.”

T “Maybe…”

“My fist clenches tightly beneath the table.”


>>It’s not worth it.
>>I’ve had about enough of this.

>>I’ve had about enough of this.


“Just before I get up I think through it one more time.”

>>It’s not worth it.


“I can see it now.”

>>

“Her stupid horn jammed right in her eye.”

“I sigh.”

“My fist unfurls.”

A “Yeah, sure, whatever.”

“God this was a waste of a day.”

“Normally I would love just spending time with Fang, but she’s been so preoccupied
with the band lately.”

“I don’t even know why she needed me today when all she did was drag me around.”

“And now being anywhere near Trish is the cherry on the shit sundae.”

“Fang returns a few moments later with a milkshake in her hand.”

F “What’d I miss?”

T “Just talking to White Knight about his taste in music.”

“Fuck this.”

“I can’t deal with this anymore.”

“Looking to my phone, I make up a convenient excuse to get the hell out of there.”

A “Shit, I just got a text from the post office. Says my dad’s prom suit came and I
wanted to get there before it closed.”

A “Sorry to do this Fang, I gotta go. See you at school tomorrow.”


“I hate lying to Fang this way but I just can’t stand being around Trish any more.”

F “O-oh, it wasn’t anything I did, was it?”

A “Everything’s fine, I just want to be ready for prom and your show.”

“That seemed to put her at ease.”

F “Alright… we still have a bunch to talk about for the show. See you tomorrow,
then.”

Re “Peace, dude.”

“I give Fang a reassuring hug and promptly head towards the bus stop, not missing
Trish’s dumb smug face as I pass her.”

“God damn it.”

“...”
13B. Let’s all go to a Concert

“The saturday after next I’m laying in bed, scrolling through various feeds of
worthless information.”

“God this Sandanistan post-modern graffitist RSS feed’s become a dumpster fire.
Fucking tourists.”

“I got an open can of soda, the lights are out, and I can hear RAYmba bumping
around his box.”

“This is the life.”

“I’m about to reply to some guy claiming that he is most definitely angered in the
posterior, but my phone buzzes, throwing off my answer.”

“It’s a text from Fang.”

“Fang: heyyyyyyy you got any plans later today?”

“Anon: who do you take me for”

“Anon: why do you ask?”


“Fang: ive shown you some songs from my favorite band right?”

“Fang: ‘Bigly Die’?”

“I vaguely recall Fang’s phone bugging out occasionally, was that supposed to be
music?”

“Anon: think so yeah”

“Fang: theyre coming into town for tonight only!!!!!!!”

“Anon: cool, you plan on buying a ticket?”

“Fang: no need >:)))))”

“Fang: i won them in a raffle!”

“Anon: now when you say ‘them’...”

“Fang: of course i want you to go dork”

“Anon: oh. cool.”

“Anon: wait”

“Fang: ill come pick you up at six tonight, dont forget!”

“Anon: alright, see you then”

“My hand falls to my side, dropping the phone onto the mattress.”

“A concert…”

“On the one hand, I get to spend time with Fang doing something they love.”

“On the other, concert.”

“Who am I kidding, of course I’m going.”

“I should go run and buy some earplugs just in case…”


“...”

“As I wait in front of my building for Fang I can’t help but feel a bit nervous.”

“I’ve never been to a proper concert before.”

“The closest was Fang and the band at Moe’s place.”

“That counts, right?”

“Before I can continue that thought, I spot the NasCar speeding towards me.”

“I feel myself cringe a bit for even thinking of that name.”

“I move to the back before the car comes to a complete stop and open the door, Fang
sitting on the other side.”

F “Get in, dweeb.”

“I can tell Naser is a bit nervous driving in this part of town with how he’s
constantly looking around the car.”

“The door barely shuts when he speeds away from my apartment building and back
towards civilization.”

Nas “So uh, Anon…”

A “Yeah?”

Nas “That’s where you live?”

“Essentially asking ‘are you that poor’.”

A “Nah, I just sleep there, keep all my stuff there, and hang out there most of the
time.”

“That elicited a laugh from Fang and a confused look from Naser.”

“Can’t win them all I guess.”

A “So this band-”

F “Bigly Die.”

A “Bigly Die. Where are they playing at?”

F “Some club on the other side of town called the Lava Lamp.”

“Can’t say I’ve really been to a club either.”

A “...And what genre is their music exactly?”


F “They’re an Extreme Indie Experimental Hardcore-Mathcore-Grindcore Industrial
Heavy Punk Metal band.”

“...What.”

F “With an emphasis on creative expression and a down-to-earth worldview that just


really speaks to me.”

F “It’s the kind of stuff I wish we could have played in our band but Trish never
thought it was ‘marketable’ enough.”

A “English?”

Nas “Blender noises.”

A “Thanks.”

F “Oh, fuck both of you.”

“Fang pouts, or as they put it, was in ‘silent protest against the world.’”

“Really, the way Fang crossed their arms and pointedly looked away from the two of
us made me chuckle at the cute angry act.”

A “So, word salad --leftist meme genre aside, they sound pretty big.”

Nas “Not really.”

F “They’re pretty underground, honestly.”

“Fang passes my ticket over so I can see.”

“Oh wow.”

“The venue can hold double what Moe’s could.”

“...Does that make it a big venue? Trish said Moe’s was small.”

F “The place shouldn’t be too packed.”

F “I know you don’t exactly like crowds, Anon.”


“Awww, she does care.”

“When we get there Naser stops me before I get out.”

Nas “You need earplugs bro?”

A “Oh, I brought my own actually, but thanks.”

F “Bunch of pansies. Both of you.”

“Naser smiles again and drives off, leaving Fang and I in front of the building.”

“The place is a warehouse --garden shed three --feet stories tall, with graffiti
staining nearly every inch of it.”

“I’ve always wondered how people get up there.”

“Already I can hear the bass rattling my eardrums.”

“A man by the entrance checks our tickets and lets us pass.”

A “This place must be pretty nice if they have to use a bouncer.”

F “Oh yeah, the band makes plenty. They can afford some neat stuff like that.”

“Painted signs in the lobby point to a stairwell leading down into the basement.”

“The temperature rises a good twenty degrees on the trip down.”

A “Jeez, do they have a furnace going down here?”

F “Concerts are usually hot, Anon.”

F “Didn’t I tell you to bring a water bottle or something?”

A “No?” --I mean I did but mine’s filled with vodka?

F “Oops.”
F “Well, there was a water fountain back up in the lobby. Not sure if you want to
actually drink from it though unless you have a lead stomach lining.”

A “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“The music’s getting pretty loud --starting to sound like a gaggle of pissed-off
cats being dropped into lawnmower blades, so I pop in the earplugs I got earlier.”

“I was starting to hear animalistic chanting combined with the arrhythmic bashing
of drums and what could only be described as the unholy fusion of squealing
feedback and an unmaintained generator running on overdrive.”

“Fang rolls their eyes and gestures to the open door to the concert hall.”

F “The preshow’s almost done, we got here just in time.”

“As soon as we open the doors, we’re almost blown back by the wall of sound that
blasts past us.”

“The earplugs were not helping. At all.”

“I’m pretty sure I just went deaf.”

“There are about a hundred to a hundred fifty of the concert-goers, give or take.”

“Most of them are thronging the stage while a few hang back and nurse their beers,
waiting for the show to start.”

??? “THANK YOU MOTHERFUCKERS FOR BEING HERE TONIGHT!”

“The crowd responds with a collective roar of approval, Fang adding her voice to
the cacophonic chorus.”

??? “It was an honor to open for the main show tonight, and they’re in for the gig
of their lives judging by how brutal you guys were in the pit!”

“Another roar rips from the audience at the bare-faced flattery, probably the
leftover adrenaline in their systems.”

??? “Alright… It’s time. Are you guys ready?”

“The crowd is practically foaming at the mouth as they scream unintelligibly yet
again.”
??? “Come on, is that all you fucking got?! ARE YOU FUCKING READY?!”

“I thought that they couldn’t possibly have been more ready, but they somehow
manage to scream even louder.”

“I think I even saw some guy get punched as the person next to him thrust his fist
upward while he yelled.”

??? “Now that’s what I like to hear. Let’s welcome… BIGLY DIE!”

“The crowd goes absolutely nuclear, people jumping up and down screaming their
heads off as the band walks up onto the stage.”

-- “Looking next to me, Fang seems to have turned into a cartoonish scribble as she
completely loses her shit.”

“Without another word they launch right into their opening song.”

“A flurry of instruments meet my ears in something vaguely resembling music.”

“I still don’t quite understand the appeal, but the energy of the moment is getting
to me.”

“Before I know it I’m jumping and fist swinging along with everyone else.”

“Fang sees me join in and their beaming smile intensifies.”

“Soon enough I’m elbow deep in the pit screaming as wildly as the crowd.”

“...Then a stray elbow clocks --boops me out early.”

“...”

“Urgh…”

“Guh… Fuck piss cunt shit…”

??? “How the fuck are you so heavy?”

“Wha…?”
“Someone’s dragging me?”

F “Oh, you’re back!”

“Fang lets me down onto my back, and I sit up straight.”

“We’re back in the lobby of the building, only it’s a lot quieter than when we
first arrived.”

“A dull pain rings through my head.”

F “Are you alright?”

A “What happened?”

F “No idea, after the show I just found you laying on the ground.”

F “You’re pretty lucky no one jumped on you. Everyone’s got good ole steel toes.”

A “I was out the rest of the show?”

F “That’s the concert experience, right?”

F “Isn’t it great?”

A “It… certainly is a different experience, yeah.”

A “Argh, my head…”

F “Yeah, you’re gonna want a rag or something.”

F “Your lip’s pretty busted.”

“I feel around my face, and sure enough a new pulse of pain shakes me.”

“My fingers are covered in blood.” -- as I register my new cleft lip.

A “Do you got one?”


F “No… Sorry…”

“I bunch up the front of my shirt and hold it to my mouth.”

F “Naser always keeps a first-aid kit in his trunk, he’ll be here in ten or so
minutes.”

F “You’ll look like ass at school for a few days but it can’t be that much of a
change.”

“Fang laughs at their own joke and I try to join in before my splitting headache
kicks in.”

F “Can you get up or do I have to drag you all the way out the door?”

“My legs are a bit wobbly but I manage to stand up with some assistance from Fang.”

“They lead me out the front of the building and we sit on the curb to wait for
Naser.”

F “You doing okay? The bleeding stopped.”

A “I feel like my head’s about to explode but I’ll be fine.”

A “Better than last time this happened at least.”

-- F “At least this time you got beat up by an animate object, amiright? :^)”

“Fang reaches into their pocket and retrieves their lighter and pack of
cigarettes.”

F “...You want a smoke?”

A “You know me too well.”

“I take them from Fang’s hand and light my own cigarette for once.”

“Taking my first draw and it’s almost enough to ignore my migraine.”

F “You seem to really like those.”

A “Yeah…”

F “You should get around to scraping enough pennies to get your own sometime.”

A “Yeah, I’ll start buying my own when they cost less than my monthly rent.”
F “So until then you’re gonna keep getting your teeth kicked in just to get one of
mine?”

A “That’s the plan!”

“We chuckle, and Fang shifts closer to me, hugging my arm.”

F “Dweeb.”

“...”

13C. Let’s all go Camping

“It’s been a few weeks since I asked Lucy out to prom.”

“Gotta say, things are looking up for me right now.”

“Lucy has really taken to helping Rosa with the school gardens.”

“Rosa doesn’t force me to help anymore, but I still frequently lend a hand.”

“Just earlier today Lucy and I were planting some hydrangeas that were set to bloom
in just a few weeks.”

“And now I’m setting up a pair of tents.”

“Alone.”

“Despite being in a group of four.”

>>Italicize everything until the next programmer note

“Stella’s chattering with me about the esoteric while the school delinquents get
the Orwellian treatment from Rosa, who swaps between helping Fang plant some kind
of exotic flower I don’t know and barking orders.”

“I understand maybe a third of what Stella’s saying and mostly just nod along.”

St “-nights really important because the moon will be in perfect alignment for my
divinations.”
A “Right, right. Lunar eclipse. Is that the one where you can’t see the Moon or the
one where you can’t see the sun?”

St “ {i}*sigh*{/i}

St “It’s also called a Blood Moon for its color?”

St “It’s a very important night for me, Anon.”

St “I feel as though my divinations will be at their best under it’s crimson glow.”

A “But camping?”

Ro “Oh, yes!”

Ro “My backyard is very big. Long bus ride to school.”

Ro “But I see the stars at night so well, so Stella has slumber parties often!”

F “Anon! We should go to!”

A “Wait what why?”

F “We can go stargazing Anon. Just imagine it.”

A “But camping? Can’t we just-”

F “C’mon Anon. Don’t you want to watch the stars together with me?”

“Lucy’s pleading eyes lock onto mine.”

A “Alriiiiiight. As long as we have tents. I don’t wanna deal with insects.”

>>stop italicizing here

A “{i}As long as we have tents.{/i} Me and my stupid fucking mouth.”

“Finally I manage to get a post to stick into the soft soil.”

“One down. Nineteen to go.”


“Ugh, and now Lucy’s gonna use those cute sad eyes whenever she wants something.”

“And no alone time with her, since all the girls are working at the grill.”

A “Hey, you guys aren’t just making dinner with that gross herbivore meat, right?”

Ro “Of course! I’m always prepared to serve guests.”

St “Wait, which ones were which again?”

A “Wha- If I bite into even a single bug your cards are going into the campfire.”

Ro “Hey! Camping is supposed to be relaxing! Relax!”

Ro “Also, when you’re done with the tents you need to start the campfire.”

A “Wait, why me?”

“Rosa and Stella flinch and exchange glances.”

St “Just… figured you’d know, is all.”

A “Why would I… Hey!”

St “The principal fits the bill so well.”

Ro “Guess that’s just him.”

F “Come on, quit teasing him.”

F “Who cares if he hasn’t evolved to fire yet?”

“I trip into the tent and tear the whole thing down.”

“By the time I get both of the tents standing, the sun is nearing the horizon.”

“My back already hurts from setting everything up.”


“Luckily Lucy carries around a lighter for her cigarettes so I was able to start a
small fire.”

“I slump on one of the logs around the firepit and try to massage my shoulders.”

Ro “Hello, An-on.”

A “Oh, is the food ready?”

Ro “Stella and Lucy are getting some plates to use.”

Ro “Just taking a seat for a minute.”

A “Thanks for inviting Lucy and me to camp back here.”

Ro “Oh, don’t thank me, I am very happy to have friends over!”

Ro “Although normally I struggle with making the tents stand.”

Ro “So really I must thank you for setting it up for me!”

A “Oh, uh, it was nothing.”

“Stella calls out from the back door to Rosa’s house.”

“She’s returning with Lucy, both holding extra utensils and snack foods.”

“Rosa waves them over.”

Ro “I never pictured Fang coming over.”

Ro “Lucy really is lucky to have you.”

“Stella struggles to separate the false shish kebabs from the real meat before
handing me a plate.”

“Lucy gets that look in her eye and snatches the bigger one right off.”

St “Eventide draws near. I believe it best we sojourn from the fated ones, Rosa. My
scrying glass awaits.”
“What.”

F “Er, what? I don’t speak… whatever the fuck that was.”

Ro “*giggle* I believe Stella means that the sun is setting and we need to go set
up her telescope.”

A “Then why didn’t she just say that?”

“Rosa and Stella take their plates of imposter kebabs and start walking to the
other end of Rosa’s yard.”

“Fang shrugs at me and starts devouring her food.”

“With nothing to do but wait for night time I also begin to remove kebab.”

F “Bleh. I think Stella undercooked this. Gimme some of yours.”

A “No way, you have your own.”

F “Well I want yours too. You’re supposed to share with your girlfriend.”

“Damn her and her filthy ptero-logic.”

A “Fiiiiiiiiine. You can have a bite.”

“I hold out the meat on a stick for her.”

“She grins wickedly.”

“I realize my mistake as I watch her maw widen and engulf the entirety of my
kebab.”

“Once she pulls away I’m left holding a crispy yet clean wooden stick.”

F “Mmmm… Stolen food is the best food.”

A “Well that was uncalled for.”

F “Here, take the gross one.”


“Lucy hands over her undercooked kebab.”

A “Whatever, I like it rare anyways.”

F “You should be thanking me, then.”

“She leans her head into my shoulder.”

“Yuck, this really was undercooked.”

“I hold the stick over the fire to char a bit more.”

F “That’s just going to burn the outside.”

A “Can’t be harder than roasting a marshmallow, right?”

F “Did Rosa bring any?”

A “Think so. Save your kebab stick for them.”

F “Think I’d rather use a regular stick off the ground than get a greasy
marshmallow.”

A “Heh.”

“Lucy and I listen to the crackling of the fire for a few minutes.”

“Somewhere in the distance I hear Stella yelling at Rosa about leaving the
telescope cap on.”

F “...”

F “Rosa said earlier that I’m lucky to have you.”

A “You feel lucky --, punk? I’m thinking it’s the other way around.”

F “I do.”

F “Rosa was right, I wouldn’t have thought about going camping back in first
semester.”

F “Guess I really have been changing a lot.”

F “... Your kebab’s on fire.”

A “Huh- Shit!”

“I blow out the now burnt chunks of meat.”

A “Uhhh… Flambe?”

“Lucy snorts.”

“Chewing down on this, it’s not the worst thing I’ve eaten.”

A “Still want a piece?”

“She just holds her mouth open.”

“I put the stick in biting range and she gnaws the chunk off.”

F “Yeah, It’s not undercooked anymore. That’s for certain.”

A “Looks like I poured jet fuel on it.”

“Lucy leans back into her arms staring up at the night sky.”

“I finish off the stick and join her.”

“Stella was right, the stars look great out here.”

“Reminds me of home.”

F “The stars do?”

A “Hm? Oh. Yeah, there wasn’t a lot of light pollution around Rock Bottom.”

A “In the brief time I was in scouts, I got to look at the constellations a bit.”
F “Name a few.”

A “I don’t remember now, this was like a decade ago.”

A “... Orion’s belt?”

F “Anyone can name Orion’s belt.”

A “Uh… big spoon and lil spoon?”

F “You mean the dippers?”

A “Also yes.”

“Lucy hums and scoots close enough so I can wrap an arm around her shoulder.”

“Her head leans on my shoulder and I can’t help but smile.”

F “Something like this, then?”

A “Eh, close enough.”

A “I think you can see Mars too, it’s supposed to be the red one.”

F “Uh… I think that’s the moon, Anon.”

A “...”

A “It’s been a while, okay? Cut your boyfriend some slack.”

“I feel her head shake as she withholds a snicker for my sake.”

A “Still managed to get my badge though.”

F “Aren’t you the big strong man.”

A “... Fuck it. A compliment’s a compliment.”

“We gaze up at the night sky in companionable silence.”


F “Oh! Look!”

“Lucy points to the sky at a shooting star.”

A “Well hey, you got a wish?”

F “That’s not a shooting star, dork.”

A “It isn’t?”

-- F “That’s the meteor which would have killed us all in a parallel universe, you
know, in case you fucked up with playing this game you fat loser.”

“I look again.”

“The star is joined by several smaller dots trailing behind, in the sky for only an
instant before disappearing over the other horizon.”

A “Whoa, a meteor shower.”

“Stella’s incomprehensible excited gibberish breaches our ears.”

-- “I notice that one of the bright spots didn’t streak off into the night, and it
was steadily growing larger and larger.”

“Lucy lays down on her back to get a better view.”

“A little dirt on my clothes is worth the moment.”

“Man, being here with Lucy, after such a wonderful night…”

“I feel like no matter what, everything’s going to be just fine.”

F “...I feel the same.”

“I’m just going to start biting my tongue.”

F “Thank you for being here with me, Anon.”


A “I mean… This was all you. And Rosa and Stella too.”

F “No, you big dweeb… I mean…”

F “You’ve always been there for me even when I was so mean to you.”

F “I don’t know what kind of road I was going down when you met me, but…”

F “But I know it wasn’t a good place to be. I don’t know where I was going to end
up if I never found you.”

F “You saved me, Anon. And I’ll always be grateful for that.”

-- A “That’s fucking gay, bro.”

“She sits up and looks down to me with that warm smile of hers.”

“Hearing her put it that way…”

“Maybe I did ‘fix’ Lucy after all.”

“She seems so happy with how things are, it doesn’t matter if it was all part of
someone’s stupid plan.”

“Lucy’s fingers dance across my cheek.”

“Slowly, slowly, ever so slowly.”

“Her eyes lid as she leans forward, her head tilting and her mouth opening slowly.”

“It’s taken a month for us to figure this out, but now that we’ve had practice…”

“I raise myself up, my own mouth meeting her’s in a slow and soft connection.”

“Her tongue slides along mine and this time she manages not to gag me with it.”

“Our first through fourteen kisses never went this smoothly.”

“And it’s utter bliss as we savor each other’s lips -- esophagii.”

“And while I would stay like this forever if I could.”

“Air is very much a necessity for life.”


“We separate just as slowly as when we connected.”

“Lucy’s eyes open as she smiles impishly at me.”

F “I love you.”

“Yeah. Me too.”

“She giggles and lays down. Her head resting on my shoulder and her wing becoming a
blanket as we look back to the stars.”

“We stay laying a while longer, keeping the red moon company.”

-- “This totally beats staying at home and playing XRox.”

“...”
13D. Let’s all go to the Aquarium

“Every day after school for the next few weeks I would join Fang to help her
practice.”

“Some days we would go to her place, and other days her father was home early.”

“Those days Fang would ‘politely ask’ Naser to drop her off at my place.”

“The bribes to keep it from her dad stopped being necessary after the third time.”

“The practice sessions themselves were long and arduous.”

“Sessions would go on until either her dad kicked me out or sundown.”

“Fang would play for hours on end, occasionally stopping to let me try and to take
a break.”

“Despite my warnings, she’d play until her fingertips were red and raw.”

“I decided it was time for a real break once I ran out of band aids.”

“My great idea was to take out the map of the city I’d had since I moved in and
throw a dart at it to decide where we’d go for the day.”
“There’s lots of neat places in the city for dates, the mall, the arcade, a local
amusement park.”

“...And the dart landed in the ocean over the dock.”

“The look from Fang told me she wasn’t stepping anywhere near a tuna boat.”

“The Aquarium it is.”

“So here we are inside after paying admission.”

“I’d suggested she wear some gloves, just to protect her hands.”

“I don’t think she understood the second part, because they were fingerless.”

“The Aquarium is a large marble building on a marina.”

“The various exhibits sprawl out to make the place turtle-shaped from a birds-eye
view.”

“It’s a nice place, but I still need to make this entertaining to Fang.”

“She already looks bored.”

“Looking through one of the map kiosks, I try to make a mental plan for the trip.”

A “Uhh… They got exhibits for the deep sea, the gulf of Mexico, --the dopefish,
tropical reefs…”

A “... Eenie meanie mini-”

F “Really?”

A “Sea turtles it is.”

“I take Fang’s hand and lead her through the lobby into the chamber labeled ‘Sea
Turtle Conservatory’.”

F “Anon, are you sure you want to spend the day here? If you wanted to go to the
mall or somethin- omigawd.”
“A little sea turtle swims out of hiding in the tank right in front of us.”

“Immediately Fang breaks free of my arm and presses against the glass.”

F “Look at these cute little shits, I love them!”

A “Yeah, I see them.”

“I peer into the tank and see a few more hatchlings bob out of the decorative
grass.”

“The hype becomes contagious and I find myself pressed against the glass as well.”

Attendant “Please avoid touching the glass, it stresses the little guys out.”

A “Oh, sorry.”

A “Come on Fang, there’s more stuff to see.”

F “Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnno.”

A “There’s more here than just those baby turtles, you know.”

F “Doesn’t matter.”

A “You’re just going to stay here all day then?”

F “Yyyeeeep.”

A “What’ll you do for lunch?”

F “Bring me something from the cafe.”

A “Alright, here I am going off without you.”

A “Oh look, a Dumbo Octopus.”

F “Whereisit?”
“In a snap Fang’s moved from pressing her face against the turtle tank to pressing
it against the octopus tank.”

Attendant “Ma’am, please refrain from-”

F “OmigoshAnonlookatit.”

F “It’s like a living egg yolk with button eyes.”

A “Is that the first analogy you can think of…?”

F “And what’s over there? Are those seahorses holy crap I have to take a video of
this.”

“I shrug apologetically at the attendant who has given up entirely.”

“But watching Fang zoom between the exhibits to gush over each oddly cute sea
animal was just too much.”

“Subtly my phone finds its way into my jacket pocket, already set to record.”

“She’ll probably kill me if she found out.”

“But it’d be a good death.”

“Wait, where’d she go?”

“I round the corner to see the next room has a large group of school children
hovering over a stingray touch tank.”

“That is, a large group of school children and Fang, towering above the rest.”

“She does have the act down though.”

A “Oh, cool, a stingray pool.”

A “You plan on touching one?”

F “Touch?”

A “Yeah, you can put your hand in and they’ll slide against it, watch.”
“I roll up my jacket sleeve and push my hand into the water, splaying it out.”

“Fang and the children lean in intently.”

“The water’s cold, but sure enough, a few of the playful things make their round
and slide up right against it like a cat begging for scratches.”

A “See?”

“Several in the crowd start jumping with excitement and put their own hands in the
water to try for themselves.”

“Fang doesn’t seem completely convinced, though.”

F “You sure they’re alright to just touch like that? Aren't those dangerous?”

A “I mean, it’s a bit slimy, but there’s a hand sanitizer thing on the wall right
there.”

F “That isn’t what I meant.”

A “Come on, I’ll make sure they don’t bite.”

“Fang reluctantly grabs my dry arm and I lead her to a spot not occupied by ankle
biters.”

“I put my hand back in and motion for Fang to do the same.”

--”Fang slips the knife out of my pocket and holds it directly above one of the
rays.”

--F “This is for Steve!”

“She hesitates with her hand raised just above the waters’ surface, then plunges
her hand down next to mine.”

“It doesn’t take long for a few rays to make the corner and brush up against our
hands.”

F “Eep!”
A “You alright?”

F “Yeah, no, it’s just… You were right about them being slimy.”

A “Well, I have yet to hear of a dry fish.”

F “Shut up.”

“After a few more rounds of rays, Fang decides she’s had enough.”

A “See, that wasn’t terrible, right?”

A “Actually, you got all your fingers right?”

F “I dunno, wanna check?”

“Her cheeky grin and raised middle finger confirm her hand’s integrity.”

F “So uh…”

F “Which exhibit are we checking next?”

“I check the aquarium pamphlet to see where we haven’t been yet.”

A “Well… if we go outside we can see the dolphin pools. That way it loops back
through the deep sea exhibits.”

“With Fang in agreement I lead her towards the exit marked with a large dolphin
sign.”

“Upon exiting the building my nose is assaulted by a mix of salty air and the smell
of raw fish.”

“Somehow it’s even fishier than inside the aquarium.”

F “Ooh, smells like lunch.”

A “It says they should be feeding the dolphins pretty soon.”

“The walkway circles around a large pool with several dolphins swimming around, and
I can make out the trainer holding a hoop with a bucket of fish by their feet.”

“One of the dolphins jumps straight through the hoop and is rewarded with a fish
caught out of the air.”
F “Would you jump through a hoola hoop for me if I had treats?”

A “...”

“I notice the trainer has traded the hoop for a large brush and is getting one of
the dolphins to open its mouth.”

“The trainer starts brushing the Dolphin’s teeth and showing off the rows of neatly
spaced cones.”

“I make a show of craning my neck down to get a view of Fang’s teeth from below.”

“She raises an eyebrow for a second and then realizes.”

“An elbow jams into my shoulder and her other hand covers her snout.”

A “So that’s how you brush your teeth!”

F “...I don’t need someone to bribe me at least.”

A “Well if you ever need help I’m sure I can get them to lend me one of those
brushes.”

“And that gets me a jab to the ribs this time.”

A “Oh come on, you have to admit they look a bit like you...”

[Fang dolphin CG?]

F “Ehh, I don’t see it.”

“The dolphin beside her nods in agreement.”

“...Right then…”

A “So, how bout we hit the last spot and then go grab our own lunch?”

A “Unless you want to have some tuna with your clone there.”

“Fang rolls her eyes at that.”

“Her dolphin duplicate did too.”


A “You’re fucking with me, aren’t you.”

F “What’re you talking about?”

“Fang’s aquatic doppelganger makes a laugh-like chirping and finally swims away.”

“...”

A “So Deep Sea then!”

“We leave the dolphin pen, following signs back towards the building.”

“The floor slopes slowly until we reach a door labelled as the sub-level to our
destination.”

“Pushing through, we find ourselves in an oversized hamster tube beneath the


water.”

“Oh, I didn’t realize they had one of these.”

“From within the glass walkway we’re surrounded by a myriad of colorful marine life
swimming around us.”

“Fang’s eyes are wide as she tries to follow the different schools of fish that
dart to and fro about.”

“I’m more mesmerized by the water filtered light cascading off Fang, casting her in
a gentle glow that illuminates her white feathers.”

“God. So glad I’m recording this.”

F “Recording what?”

A “The uh… The shark! Yeah, that cool looking shark over there!”

“I point to the shark that’s currently lazing about, casually drifting by the
walkway.”

“Fang turns to gush at the shark, giving me the opportunity to quickly stop my
phone and see that my battery is near dead and memory near full.”
A “Ah, there’s the last exhibit.”

“I hold open another set of doors, the room within near pitch black.”

F “Is it closed?”

A “Hm?”

F “The lights…”

A “Oh! Nah, the room is dark because the things inside aren’t used to light.”

F “O-oh.”

A “Wait… are you sca-”

F “No! I just… Wasn’t expecting it, is all.”

“I offer her my hand.”

“Despite her claim otherwise I can feel how tense she is by how her fingernails dig
into my hand.”

“I lead her into the darkened room, what little light there is coming from the
various animals within.”

“The aquariums within are packed with bioluminescent jellyfish, illuminating the
darkened room with an ethereal glow.”

F “Whoa. This is…”

“Beautiful.”

F “Yeah… that…”

“I wasn’t referring to the exhibit.”

“Fang’s grip on my hand eases, and her fingers work to intertwine with mine.”

“With what little light there is I can make out Fang’s smile.”
“My eyes have adjusted enough that I can see Fang’s eyes locked onto mine, the
gossamer light making them glow.”

“My lips press softly onto Fang’s beak-end in a chaste peck.”

F “eep!”

F “Oi! G-give me a warning next time!”

A “Mmmm… Naaaah.”

“I laugh even as her hip bumps me roughly.”

“Our interlocked fingers prevent her from using her preferred elbow tactic.”

A “So… had fun?”

F “Mmmm… Maaaaybe…”

F “I’ll say yes if you delete that recording.”

A “Awwww, but you were so cute!”

F “Sh-shut up! I’m sexy damn it! Not cute!”

A “Why not both?”

“She glowers.”

A “Feel rested?”

F “A bit. I’ll feel even more rested after some lunch though.”

A “Sounds like a plan.”

“The rest of our rest day was spent just relaxing on the pier.”

“Snacks on the boardwalk.”


“A bad sunburn on my neck.”

“And a very relaxed girlfriend.”

“Overall, mission successful.”

“Except the sunburn.”

“Ow.”

“...”

14. Prom is...

“-One Month Later-”

“It’s prom night.”

“My old man was kind enough to send over his old tuxedo from his time at high
school.”

“It took a bit of sewing, but I got it looking pretty good.”

“Judging by the wine stains on the sleeves, Dad’s made a lot of important
announcements in this tuxedo.”

“Gives it a bit of history, I guess.”

“When I arrive at Fang’s place with a cheap corsage I see the Pomegranate Parasite
waiting outside the front door.”

“Great.”

“And dear god, how can she move in that dress.”

“The top half looks like it’s been shrink-wrapped to her body.”

“And I’m one hundred percent sure there’s nothing beneath the bottom half.”

N “Oh, I already knocked Anon.”


N “Naser will be out in a moment to invite us in, I’m sure Fang will be getting
ready too.”

N “I’ve heard the two of you are going to prom together!”

“Ladies and gentlemen, the next Sherlock Holmes.”

A “No, I just happen to be here in a suit to go golfing.”

“I ignore her, focusing instead on not stabbing my palm even more on this flower’s
thorns.”

“Fuck it, free is free.”

“And nothing more free than a five finger discount from the neighbor’s yard.”

N “You and Fang just make the cutest couple! Did you two sign up for prom king and
queen?”

A “Nah. She said something about the ‘fascist sexist monarchy system’.”

-- A “Honestly kinda cringe and bluepilled.”

N “Well, Naser and I have entered and we are going to be prom royalty. Ooooh, I can
not wait to wear that beautiful tiara --Plastic Disney Princess tiara, I picked it
out and everything and the crown--Burger King cardboard crown for Naser-”
[Naomi keikaku here]

“I’ve already tuned her out.”

“Naser opens the door.”

“Well if that isn’t the fanciest jacket I’ve seen in a while.”

“It’s certainly better than the background of Avatar he always wears.”

Nas “Sorry to keep you waiting, Naomi.”

Nas “This thing is a nightmare to get over my wings.”

Nas “Oh, Anon! Come on in, didn’t know you were already here.”
“He waves for the two of us to enter, pecking Naomi on the cheek when she passes.”

“Fang’s Mother speaks up from the kitchen.”

FangMom “Oh! Oh! Is that Anon?”

Nas “Here we go.”

“The small pterodactyl comes out, a bowl she’s struggling to stir in her arms.”

FangMom “My, aren’t you handsome.”

FangMom “Pictures! I need to get pictures of you and Lucy!”

“She sets the bowl aside on the coffee table to frantically search for a polaroid
camera.”

FangMom “To think Lucy would have such a wonderful young man to take her to prom!”

FangMom “Aha! Found it. Hold still, dear.”

“ARGH! Like getting slapped in the face by the sun’s dick!”

“I blink the blindness away. So that’s why Naser has those fucking aviators.”

FangMom “Lucy will be downstairs in a bit, she’s just getting the last of her
makeup on!”

FangMom “In the meantime, take a seat! I’ve got some cookies in the oven that are
almost ready!”

A “Er, yes, thank you ma’am.”

“I take my seat in the usual spot, sinking in and feeling the pillows conform
around my spine.”

“This thing must cost a fortune.”

“Fang’s dad is a police commissioner if I recall.”


“That explains the luxurious furnishings.”

“Now that I think about it, I’m surprised I haven’t seen him yet.”

FangDad “So…”

“I hope I didn’t just ruin these slacks.”

A “Good evening, sir.”

A “I didn’t even see you in your chair, sir.”

A “My apologies.”

FangDad “Don’t sweat it, son.”

FangDad “Thing about humans, as well as many carnivores, is that their vision is
based largely on movement.”

FangDad “You’d be surprised how useful staying quiet and stationary can be.”

FangDad “How close you can get to someone without them knowing-”

FangMom “Sweetheart.”

FangMom “No. Intimidating. The Suitor.”

“The big guy deflates a bit in his chair.”

FangDad “Point is, don’t get any funny ideas.”

A “Yessir.”

N “We’re all taking the NasCar, right?”

Nas “Yeah, yeah.”

Nas “Once Fang gets down we’ll skedaddle.”


A “So until then we just sit and chill?”

N “We could take more pictures!”

Nas/A “Please no.”

FangMom “Oh! I would love to make this a little photo op!”

“Thirty photos later and I never want to see another camera again.”

“Fang’s mom decided to take pictures of every possible combination of us.”

“I don’t know which was worse, having to pose with Naomi or Fang’s dad digging his
murder claws into my shoulder.”

“I’ve lost nearly all feeling in that arm.”

“Pretty sure that’ll leave a bruise worse than my accelerated hug with the stair
bollard last month.”

“At least the pics with Naser were a nice reprieve.”

“We ended up looking like the blues brothers, standing side by side in fuck ugly
suits.”

“Just as I was about to resign myself to premature blindness--not from cooming from
the camera flash, my saviour arrives.”

F “Oh, Anon, you’re already here!”

14A. Prom is Complicated

“Fang comes downstairs in a fancy getup.”

“It’s certainly… Less traditional than mine.”

“No less flattering though.”

“Legs for days and days.”

FangMom “Oh, I was hoping you would wear the dress I bought you sweetheart.”

F “Mooooom. This is better, it’s gender neutral formal wear!”


“Looks more like she took some dickies and made them into some booty shorts.”

“Not that I’m complaining.”

“The word plump is quite apt right now.”

N “Oh, Fang…”

N “That’s an… Interesting outfit you’re wearing.”

“Naomi side-eyes me a dagger.”

N “I thought you’d be wearing some kind of dress…”

F “Nah, dresses aren’t my style.”

N “I-I see…”

N “Well your outfit certainly… pairs well with Anon’s.”

F “Oh I love your dress too, you look just like a giant pink dildo!”

FangMom “Lucy!”

F “What did I say about that! I already told you, my name is Fang!”

“Fang’s mom just sighs.”

FangMom “Okay, sorry, Fang. But please, you don’t need to use that kind of language
towards guests!”

F “...Whatever…”

A “Maybe we should just go…”

F “I’m not sharing a ride with her.”

N “Well, if you insist, Fang. Before you go… Anon, can I speak with you for a
second?”
“Before I can even say anything, Naomi’s dragging me by the shoulder into the
kitchen.”

“She gives me a death stare for what seems like a solid minute before she begins
yelling at me”

N “What the hell is your problem, Anon?!”

“I think it’s the first time I’ve ever heard Naomi raise her voice, or even swear.”

N “How in the fuck did you manage to make Fang worse?”

A “I… What the hell are you talking about?”

“Naomi begins to somehow look even more earth-shatteringly mad.”

N “I thought you were gonna make her better!”

A “What the fuck do you mean, ‘make her better’?”

A “She’s just fine, alright? --I just wanna grill for god’s sake!”

N “It’s like you didn’t even try to help her.”

A “I did the best I could, okay!”

A “I certainly did more than whatever you’ve ever done for her.”

A “And you know what, she’s her own person! If she’s happy, I’m happy.”

“Naomi’s face of sheer anger quickly turns to disgust.”

--”It was like she was looking at human garbage”

N “I can’t believe you. You really don’t get it.”

“Naomi sighs and walks away, shoving into my shoulder on the way out, completely
disregarding my presence.”

N “Just go, get out of here.”


N “This conversation is over.”

“I can hear Fang arguing with her parents in the other room with Naomi not yelling
at me anymore.”

“I place my hands in my pockets, turn around, and head back into the foyer.”

“My walking slows, and the hall feels like it stretches onwards for miles.”

“Could Naomi be right? About Fang?”

“No, no, she can’t be right!”

“Fang is happy with herself, for once.”

“The arguing from the other room quickly and very loudly breaks my train of thought
and I stride back to where everybody is gathered.”

FangDad “...That is no way to talk to your mother, young lady!”

F “I’m not a fuckin’ lady, dad!”

“Naomi’s leaned against a wall next to the entry to that hall.”

“She turns to me, with an expression of very intently restrained rage on her face.”

“Did I really do this, Naomi?”

N “Maybe you should leave before this turns into a fight.”

“Naomi’s words were cold but probably true.”

“Fang looked ready to set her house on fire until she caught me in the corner of
her eye.”

“Without a word she grabbed me by the wrist and dragged me through the front door,
guitar in her other hand.”

F …’mme call a taxi or something.”

“We sit on the curb in silence until our ride arrives.”

“It’s the same velociraptor driver from before. Of course it is.”


“I open the door for Fang as she fits her guitar in the back seat.”

Driver “Ay, it’s my favorite couple again! How’s the leg, skinnie?”

“The driver chuckles at his own remark.”

A “We’re doing fine, take us to Volcano high.”

Driver “Prom I’m guessing? Ya’ two high school sweet-hearts should stay safe out
there! Crazy worl’ out there innit’?”

-- Driver ”Nice suit by the way, skinnie. Where’dchya get it? The suit store?”

A “Yeah I guess...”

Driver “Not too much party in you. You sure you guys are going to prom?”

A “We’re sure.”

Driver “Well, if you say so.”

“The cab starts down the street at what was easily twice the speed limit.”

“The engine is surprisingly quiet, and leaves the silence awkward between the three
of us.”

“In the mirror, the Drivers’ eyes start showing a bit of concern.”

“He glances towards the radio.”

A “Please don’t.”

Driver “Mmm.”

“He gives a disappointed look through the reflection.”

Driver “...”

Driver “You kids uh…”


Driver “You feel like stopping by a restaurant or something by any chance?”

Driver “I know a good Chinese place around here…”

Driver “I can wait outside if you two want to, y’know… I won't even add onto the
bill...”

F “I’m on a schedule.”

F “We’ll pass.”

A “No Thanks.”

Driver “Sure, sure.”

“The Driver sighs a little”

“Eventually the cab pulls up to the school gymnasium, illuminated by the


celebratory decorative string lights.”

“Fang opens her wallet to pay the toll.”

Driver “Uhh… Y’know what, it’s on the house this time, kids.”

A “Wait, really?”

Driver “Sure, yeah.”

Driver “Just have fun, y’know, and uhh…”

Driver “If you need a cab again, you know the number.”

F “We know, we know.”

F “Get lost.”

A “See you.”

“The taxi pulls away from the curb and rounds the corner back onto the main road.”
F “We still got about an hour before Spears told us to be on.”

A “Sounds like we got plenty of time.”

F “You’d be surprised. Come on.”

“I considered carrying the guitar case for her, but Fang is already a couple yards
ahead power walking to prom.”

“Fang leads the way to the school’s gymnasium. Her shoulders are tense and her
wings are raised higher than usual.”

“I pick up the pace to try and catch up, but Fang’s long legs only moved faster.”

A “What song are you going to play?”

F “Just something simple me and Trish wrote up, why?”

A “Just curious about what's going to knock the prom out of the park, what about
Reed?”

F “He was busy.”

“The two of us go up to the entrance, the room filled with seniors, strobe lights
and a very suspicious smelling fog.”

“Reed and Trish were over in a corner, both with red solo cups.”

“I didn’t need to question what was in Reed’s.”

“Reed noticed us first and waved us over.”

R “Yooo buddy, how's it going? Ready to see us kill it up on the stage?”

A “Yeah man! Fang said you guys were going to keep it pretty simple with what's up
there?”

R “Yeah, don’t want to do something super complex, just wanna keep it simple and
cool for these guys.”
A “When are you guys starting?”

R “Forty-five minutes.”

F “Forty-five? Shit I thought we were later than that, we need to start getting
prepped.”

“We hauled ass to Mr.Jingo’s room, where the band had stored their gear.”

“Reed’s drumset was in pieces and I helped him reassemble it while Trish and Fang
tuned their guitars.”

“{i}*TWANG*{/i}”

F “SHIT!”

“I drop the snare drum I was holding.”

“Fang’s guitar string had snapped.”

“Trish and Fang look devastated.”

A “Don’t you have a spare?”

F “...At home…”

T “There’s got to be some here! Reed! Anon! Look arou-”

F “We don’t have time!”

A “What? But-”

R “A spare guitar, maybe?”

F “We do not have the time!”

A “Look me and Reed can-”

F “ANON YOU’RE NOT HELPING!”


F “Look Anon, we just need to focus right now.”

F “Just go outside so we can figure something out.”

“Her words cut straight through me.”

“She’s really kicking me out right now.”

--“Here I stand, broken hearted. Wanted to shit but only farted.”


--“Bars.”

F “Please, Anon?”

“Reed is silent and I catch a glimpse of a smirking speciesist triceratops.”

“I begin to formulate a response, but just manage a small nod.”

A “I- Yeah… sure…”

“Dejected, I --turn 360 degrees and make my way to the door back to prom.”

“Fang hasn’t yelled at me like that since… the beginning of the semester.”

--“Not gonna lie, it’s kinda kinky.”

“But playing at prom seemed pretty important to Fang and who am I to interfere with
that?”

“I didn’t even want to be here in the first place, but…”

“But I’m following Moe’s advice and supporting Fang, right?”

“The music slams into me as I reenter the room, grating on my ears and thrumming
roughly in my chest.”

“A quick pass of the punch bowl and I find the ideal spot.”

“In the darkened corner, where I can support the wall with my back and sip on my
cheap punch.”

“My feet grow sore as I observe the other seniors having fun.”

“Every now and then one of them would point at me and snicker.”

“I simply hide my face behind my solo cup and try to drown out their judging eyes
behind sugary water.”
Sp “Enjoying yourself, Anon?”

“I nearly choke on the fruit punch.”

A “P-principal Spears! Uh… You’re chaperoning?”

Sp “I wouldn’t ask any of the faculty to look after you lot.”

A “Hm…”

Sp “You enjoying your prom?”

>>Could be worse.
>>Going great, actually.

>>Could be worse.
A “Could be worse.”

>>Going great, actually.


A “Going great, actually.”

>>

Sp “Where’s your date, I thought I saw the two of you enter.”

Sp “Weren’t you all getting ready in the music room?”

A “We were…”

A “Something came up… She asked me to leave.”

Sp “Fang did?”

A “Yeah, I was just getting in the way.”

Sp “I see.”

“The two of us stare into the crowd’s mindless frolicking in silence.”

Sp “Seems there’s something else on your mind, Anon.”


Sp “I can tell these things.”

A “Not really, it’s just that I’m respecting her boundaries.”

Sp “...”

Sp “Are you sure that’s what’s really going on here?”

“Ugh, here we go.”

Sp “Back when I was in the game, I learned a thing or two about-”

“I sigh and tune out the massive man standing next to me.”

“I swirl the punch in my cup around before chugging the last of it.”

“...I just want to go home…”

Sp “-ake responsibility and take it seriously.”

Sp “Relationships are a give and take sort of deal.”

Sp “Got it, Anon?”

A “...Sure, sir. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“The principal sighs and leaves me.”

“Everyone moves out of his way as he cuts his way across the room to the small
stage.”

“The music fades until all that’s left is chatter.”

“Spears takes to the stage with mic in hand for once.”

Sp “Alright everyone. Before we end tonight’s prom we have a couple of items to


take care of.”

Sp “First thing is-”


“The principal pulls a tiny gold sheaf envelope from his lapel and holds it up for
the audience to gawk at.”

Sp “to announce prom King and Queen.”

“Well this is a foregone conclusion.”

“A few students are already congratulating Naser as he’s led by the arm by his
handler.”

Sp “A drum roll, please.”

“Reed steps onto the stage with a small block in his arms.”

“He smiles and nods, pressing one of the myriad of buttons on the block.”

“A mediocre recording of the drumline plays over the speakers as Spears clears his
throat and tears open the envelope.”

Sp “And your winners.”

Sp “For the two Mil.”

Sp “Twenty-twenty class.”

Sp “Aaaaaare….”

Sp “Naaaaaser aaaaand Naaaaoooomiiiiii!”

“He tosses the paper over his shoulder and yanks out the crowns from a pocket
inside his jacket.”

“Spears backs out of the spotlight, giving a polite applause to the pair as they
rush onstage to accept.”

“The rest of the class is in a celebratory uproar.”

“Spears offers the crowns to Naomi, who puts the larger one on Naser’s crest to
droop off, and then dons the tiara..”
“The whole moment is picturesque, just like Naomi wanted.”

N “Thank you all so much, Volcano High!”

N “This is such an honor to receive.”

N “My, I don’t really have a speech prepared. But…”

N “In just one short year, we-”

Sp “Alright, alright, let’s stay on schedule.”

Sp “I promised your parents we’d be out of here by ten.”

Sp “To close off this wonderful night, I’ve asked a student band to play a few bops
for us.”

Sp “They’ve had their trials earlier in the year, but I think everyone deserves a
second chance.”

Sp “Please welcome, VVURM DRAMA!!!!”

“The audience’s applause decreases noticeably.”

??? “Wait, again?”

??? “He was there last time, wasn’t he?”

??? “I’ll just start recording…”

“Feh. Screw ‘em.”

“Fang’ll show them how much they’ve all improved.”

“I should be memorizing their faces now to make their dumbstruck expressions that
much sweeter.”

“I know Fang can pull this off.”

“Reed wheels the drumkit onstage on a dolly, and Trish follows with her bass.”
“And then Fang comes on with her bass as well.”

“Wait.”

“Wait no.”

“They couldn’t find a new string?!”

“They’re just going to repeat the first concert?!”

“What were they thinking?!”

“The three finish making last minute preparations and give an anxious look at one
another.”

“For a brief moment, Fang looks me right in the eyes.”

“I think we all know what’s about to happen.”

“The band doesn’t bother introducing themselves. Instead Trish begins plucking her
bass.”

“It all went tumbling down from there.”

“Just like before, Fang’s bass sounds horrifically wrong, far too heavy. She’s a
guitarist using a fucking jazz bass, so of course it sounds horrid.”

“And then the vocals kicked in. Reed’s lyrical expertise was not on display here,
no these sounded like they came from an edgy teen’s twitter page.”

“It’s horrific screeching, combined with the amelodious shredding on a bass


creating a cacophony equal to hundreds of cats ritualistically sacrificed.”

??? “PFFFT AHAHAHA THEY STILL FUCKING SUCK AFTER SIX MONTHS!!”

“The crowd’s cautious cheers were long gone, replaced by a symphony of ridicule.”

“The band’s already accepted their fate, both basses hang limply from their
shoulder straps.”

“Then a few students start chucking balled up tissues at their heads.”


“Reed puts his hand on Trish’s shoulder and the two duck out.”

“Fang stays a moment longer, the despair on her face manifesting through hot
streams of tears.”

“She turns to leave as well, trying to maintain a calm composure.”

“Then a student throws their red plastic cup of punch upstage.”

“It splashes against her head, drenching her suit in red dye and making her smash
onto the floor.”

“A few more food articles follow while Fang scrambles to get up.”

“Shakily, she tries walking offstage again, only to be met with another makeshift
water balloon.”

“The back of her suit shines a dull red in the stage lights, and she struggles to
not slip again.”

“Spears rushes onstage and throws his coat over Fang.”

“Naser was about to jump off the stage and tackle someone.”

“Except Naomi had her arms around his waist.”

Sp “ENOUGH!”

“The room goes completely silent aside from the sounds of Fang’s sprinting
footsteps and sobbing.”

“Spear’s lazer gaze is directed at me.”

“He jams his thumb in the direction of the exit Fang just took.”

“I slip out the side door towards the music room once again.”

“Trish and Reed were sitting in the far corner of the room, and Fang was nowhere to
be seen.”

R “Hey, man…”
T “Great, what do YOU want?”

R “Fang’s not here, dude.”

A “Where’d she go?”

R “Probably the auditorium.”

R “To be alone.”

T “We’re doing fine too, not that you care. Asshole.”

A “You’re right, Trish.”

T “I, whu-”

A “I don’t care, I need to find Fang. Now.”

R “That was uncalled for, man.”

A “And so is this.”

“*SLAM*”

“It felt so satisfying to slam the door in their useless faces.”

“I turn around and leave, flipping off Trish through the window as I go.”

“She probably blames me for this show going wrong too.”

“That I sabotaged Fang’s guitar because it would make Trish look bad or something.”

“I run to the auditorium with only the sound of my footsteps echoing through the
hallway.”

“I stop at the foyer to catch my breath.”

“My hands rest on the door, ready to push it open.”

“What do I even say to her?”


“‘Just bear with it?’ ‘You still have friends?’”

“All of that’s terrible.”

“At the same time, I can’t just stall here.”

“I push open the door softly.”

“The light spills through the foyer into the darkened chamber.”

“Spear’s jacket is thrown over one of the seats near me.”

“The door shuts behind me, leaving me in the dark.”

“I can only stand in the night-veiled room for my eyes to adjust.”

“From somewhere in the room, a faint sobbing echoes.”

A “Fang? You alright?”

“Great opener. Fantastic.”

A “I mean, are you gonna be alright?”

“The sobbing continues for a bit longer.”

F “... Nooo…”

“I slowly follow her voice down the aisle, using the chairs as my guide.”

“By this point I can vaguely make out Fang sitting at the bottom of the stage.”

A “Fang?”

“I’m standing before her now, and my eyes have adjusted just enough to make out
some details of Fang’s face.”

“Such as her eyes looking… off…”

A “Uh… Fang?”
F “I didn’t fuck up.”

A “Huh?”

F “I didn’t fuck up. Right, Anon?”

A “...Nah… You did your best up there.”

“Fang’s voice started to take on a hiss.”

F “Yeah… Yeah… it’s all their fault. Right?”

A “Whose?”

F “Who the fuck else! Naser and that BITCH!”

F “Fucking Naomi. She ruined this. She caused this all.”

F “If she had never come into my life.”

F “If she was never around Naser.”

F “If-”

A “Fang!”

“That startles Fang, making her mouth click shut.”

A “Look, forget all of that. It doesn’t matter. None of it matters.”

F “I-”

A “Naomi doesn’t matter at all. She and her stupid plan don’t fucking matter.”

F “...”

“My eyes have finally focused enough to make out the smashed bass at Fang’s feet.”
“I ignore it, instead reaching out for Fang’s shoulder.”

“She flinches under my touch, which makes my heart heavy.” --And my bladder full to
bursting.

A “Hey…”

A “I want you to do something for me, alright?”

A “Just repeat after me.”

A “Alright?”

“She doesn’t look at me, but nods her head a bit.”

A “It doesn’t matter.”

F “...it… It doesn’t matter.”

F “It doesn’t matter.”

“The hiss is back but I ignore it.”

F “It doesn’t matter.”

A “See? Feel better, right?”

F “Y-yeah. I guess.”

F “Thanks, Anon.”

A “Good.”

A “So.”

A “Uh.”

F “...I don’t wanna be here.”

A “Oh.”
A “... Do you need me to walk you home?”

F “...”

F “Actually…”

F “I uh…”

F “Can I…”

F “Stay at your place?”

F “I… Don’t want to see Naser right now…”

“I can feel my face practically glow at that thought.”

A “S-sure. Of course!”

A “Come on, let’s go home, Fang.”

“...”

“When I enter my apartment I remove my suit jacket and toss it on the floor
unceremoniously.”

“I loosen the tie, but don’t bother to take it all the way off.”

“Fang collapses in my cot without a word.”

“Guess I’m sleeping on the floor tonight.”

A “You going to sleep already?”

F “...Nooo…”

“I frown as I see her hair sticky and clinging to her dumb dress shirt.”

A “Maybe you should take a shower. At least rinse the punch off.”
F “...”

A “I’ve uh… I think I got some clothes for ya.”

F “...’kay…”

“Fang gets up from my bed and trudges over to my bathroom.”

“Right. Clothes.”

“I open my closet and look at all my identical jackets.”

“Bulk buying seemed like a good idea at the time.”

“I take the spare dress shirt dad sent me. It’s super baggy even on me.”

“I think this was from that time I tried to cosplay.”

“I shudder at the memory.”

“I take that and some board shorts from my closet and kick it shut.”

“Okay I think this should… wait.”

“Wings and tail.”

“...”

“Some minutes later with my knife and I hear the shower sputter to a stop.”

“I knock on the door and set the custom cut outfit on the floor for her.”

A “I set a change of clothes for you. Yell if you need me to do some more cutting.”

“With that I go back to my bed and consider what to do next.”

“Maybe a movie or something?”

“Fuck. What would cheer her up.”


F “...Thanks…”

“Fang plops down next to me, the shirt’s hem falling down to barely cover her
thighs and lack of the shorts I gave her.”

“If only she wasn’t so depressed, she’d look really cute right now.”

A “So… Wanna do something?”

F “Play a game or something, I dunno…”

F “I don’t want to sleep yet.”

A “Uhh… Sure…”

“Fuck me sideways, what do I have that’s presentable to someone else…”

“I got uhh… Kingdom he-no…”

“Dark so-no…”

“Senran- I feel retarded for even considering it, FUCK NO…”

“Screw it, I'll just go with Rock Ring. That always calms you down.”

“Don’t get many opportunities these days to use The Duke, anyways.”

“I boot up the XROX and insert the Rock Ring 2 disc.”

“Fang flips over to see the TV as I take my spot on the floor sitting next to her.”

A “This one’s my favorite Rock Ring story.”

“I let the campaign intro play and turn to Fang.”

“She is just blankly staring at the screen, probably still thinking about earlier.”

A “You uhhh… wanna play first?”

A “Might help take your mind off prom…”

“Fang lets out a muffled sigh.”

F “I can just watch…”


--A “See you get to play from the dino’s perspective, where every single level
revolves around genocide, slaughter and betrayal. Just like real life!”

“I decide to skip the cutscenes and get right into the gameplay.”

“Repelling a bunch of dinosaurs from the volcano caves, easy enough.”

A “Playing with a torch and rock combo is the easiest way to kill enemies.”

A “Takes more skill than using a spear thrower at least.”

F “Yeah, cool…”

--A “Hey Fang, what do you think about this scene where the character is humiliated
and then set loose to genocide his enemies.

F “Hey, Anon… You said something about Naomi having a ‘plan’ earlier. What did you
mean by that?”

“Shit.”

“Uh oh, gotta tread real carefully here…”

A “Thing is, uh… you know when I just transferred in and everything?”

F “Yeah?”

A “Well uh, Naomi kept… No, it’s nothing. Forget I said anything.”

“Fang sits up and is eye level with me.”

F “It’s not nothing. What. Did. She. Do?”

A “Now’s not a good time, we should talk about it lat-”

“Fang grabs me by the shirt collar with shaking fists.”

F “Tell me!”

F “TELL ME YOU WORM --VVURM!!”

A “I-I-I can’t! Fang, get a hold of yourself!”


“She jumps to her feet, carrying my shirt with her and lurching my head with it.”

F “DAMMIT ANON, WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN PLANNING WITH NAOMI?!”

“Her free hand raises into a slashing position, clenched into a claw so her nails
protrude like razors.”

F “TELL ME OR I’LL-”

A “SHE PUT ME WITH YOU!”

“All at once, Fang loses all energy in her body.”

“Her grip on my collar loosens and her clawed hand lowers.”

“All the tension has moved directly to her face.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a look of hopeless despair.”

“After what feels like a year of silence, I get the courage to stand again.”

A “...”

A “...Naomi made it so the two of us were together.”

A “Naser’s always worrying about you, so she wanted to get his full attention…”

A “...By trying to have someone ‘fix’ you.”

“Fang’s hands cradle her head, as though squeezing it hard enough would wake her up
from this nightmare.”

A “Fang, I didn’t have any control over it…”

A “You know I really do have feelings for you, I genuinely like you.”

-- F “uguu you really mean it?”

A “It doesn’t matter what Naomi’s stupid ‘plans’ are, we still-”


“Out of nowhere Fang’s energy returns into a fit of unrepressed rage.”

F “RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!”

F “THAT STUPID BITCH!!”

F “THAT, THAT, THAT GODDAMN SLUT!!”

A “Fang! Calm down!”

F “SHUT THE FUCK UP!!”

F “YOU LITERAL, ACTUAL TOOL!!”

“Fang, with no intention to vent her frustrations verbally, resorts to the next
best thing.”

“Physical therapy.”

“The bedsheets are quickly discarded to the other side of the room in a clump.”

A “Fang, please!”

“Fang is convulsing as though possessed, frantically looking for other things to


ruin.”

“With a swift kick, the Duke is catapulted into the bathroom.”

“Hope Fang’s foot --toesiewoesies is okay.”

A “Calm down! Don’t break anything!”

“She starts kicking and punching the nearby shelf with all her might.”

-- A “Hey, stop that, I need my security deposit or I’ll be sleeping on the


streets!”

A “Fang, stop, you’ll hurt yourself!”

“My pleas are ignored, instead all I get are continued desperate grunts as she
tries to pummel the wooden door.”
A “Fang, really, you need to stop-”

“With one last scream -- REEEEEEEEEE, she punches clean through the shelf’s cabinet
door, leaving a hole about the size of a football.”

-- ??? “SUCH A LUST FOR REVENGE!”

-- ??? “WHOOOOO?!”

-- A “Aaaaand there goes my security deposit. Yay.”

A “THAT’S ENOUGH -- YOUNG LADY!”

“While Fang is recoiling, I take the moment to grab her by the wrists and rush her
over to sit -- pomf on the bed.”

--F “What are we gonna do on your bed Anon?”

-- A “You tell me, mademoiselle…”

“Tears are streaming down her face as I shift my grip to her arms.”

F “I can’t even fall in love without HER interfering with it!”

F “You don’t like me, you just wanted to change me to something I’m not to get
Naomi off your back.”

A “That’s not true! Fang, listen to me. I do lo-”

“Before I can finish, Fang plants her foot on my chest and --Falcon Kicks pushes me
away with all her strength.”

-- “I dark souls ninjaflip around her and backstab her with my fire zweihander.”

-- “I then tell her to git gud, casual.”

“The force makes me stumble back several feet.”

“Luckily, I manage to regain my balance before falling on my ass.”

-- A “I don’t want to do this, Fang.”


“I raise my hands in a basic CQC stance.”

F “You took me away from my friends! You ruined our band!”

A “What the hell are you talking about? I haven’t done any of that!”

F “Well, Naomi is, and, and…”

F “You’re just doing whatever Naomi wants!”

A “Well then maybe Naomi had a point!”

“A deafening silence permeates the room.”

“The malice radiating from Fang is as tense as a razor.”

“Eventually, the weight of the situation causes her to collapse into the bed
completely.”

“Between sobs Fang tries squealing out more of her argument.”

F “Just-just shut up… I don’t…”

F “I…”

A “Here’s the reality, Fang.”

A “There are things about you that need fixing.”

A “That much I can agree with Naomi.”

A “And clearly, I can’t help you there.”

F “...”

A “...”

“Fang’s body tremors with her sobs.”

“Shit, was I too harsh on her?”


A “Fang… I’m sorry.”

A “*sigh*”

A “You’re right, I took you away from your friends and all that.”

A “I caused all this.”

F “No.”

F “You wish.”

F “That would be too much of an honor for you.”

-- “She’s right. I am an honorless dog. There is only one way to atone.”

-- “I reach for my plastic tanto and lay out a white mat, preparing to commit
sudoku in the manner of weeaboos of old.”

“The phrase cuts to the bone.”

“I retrieve the bedsheets from the floor.”

A “Look…”

A ''You're tired, I'm tired, let's just sleep and think it over tomorrow''

“As I drape the blanket over her shoulders, she reaches out to squeeze my hand.”

A “... I do love you, Fang.”

F “...”

A “...”

F “...”

-- “///>-<///”
“She lets go.”

A “... Goodnight.”

“Fang curls into my blanket, staring at the wall away from me.”

“I hit the light switch and lie down across the room from the bed.”

“I’d use the felt blanket that exists in every house, but I’d frankly rather just
sleep in my clothes.”

“The moonlight leaking through the curtain gives enough visibility for me to see
Fang still silently weeping.”

“I watch from afar until her breathing becomes slow and rhythmic, the sort only
achievable in a deep sleep.”

“What am I supposed to do about her?”

“I’ll talk with her more about it in the morning…”

“For now I’ll just try to get some shut-eye.”

“My heavy eyelids practically glue themselves shut, and I’m asleep within five
minutes.”

“...”
14B. Prom is For Suckers

“-One Month Later-”

“It’s prom night.”

“The night Fang and I set aside for our own little party.”

“When I arrive at Fang’s place I see the Pomegranate Parasite waiting outside the
front door.”

“Great.”

“And dear god, how can she move in that dress.”


“It looks like it’s been shrink-wrapped to her body.”

N “Oh, I already knocked Anon.”

N “Naser will be out in a moment to invite us in, I’m sure Fang will be getting
ready too.”

N “... You, uh… Don’t seem very dressed for prom?”

A “Not going.”

N “But you and Fang just make the cutest couple! You could have signed up for prom
King and Queen!”

A “She actually said something about the ‘facist sexist monarchy system’.”

-- A “Honestly kinda cringe and bluepilled.”

N “Well, Naser and I have entered and we are going to be prom royalty. Ooooh, I can
not wait to wear that beautiful tiara --Plastic Disney Princess tiara, I picked it
out and everything and the crown--Burger King cardboard crown for Naser-”
[Naomi keikaku here]

“I’ve already tuned her out.”

“Naser opens the door.”

“Well if that isn’t the fanciest jacket I’ve seen in a while.”

“It’s certainly better than the background of Avatar he always wears.”

Nas “Sorry to keep you waiting, Naomi.”

Nas “This thing is a nightmare to get over my wings.”

Nas “Oh, Anon! Come on in, didn’t know you were already here.”

“He waves for the two of us to enter, pecking Naomi on the cheek when she passes.”

“Fang’s Mother speaks up from the kitchen.”


FangMom “Oh! Oh! Is that Anon?”

Nas “Here we go.”

“The small pterodactyl comes out, a bowl she’s struggling to stir in her arms.”

FangMom “Oh! Anon’s come over too!.”

FangMom “Are you two going to prom as well?”

A “No, I’m just visiting for a bit. Fang doesn’t want to go.”

A “Where are they?”

FangMom “Lucy will be downstairs in a bit, she’s just getting the last of her
makeup on!”

FangMom “In the meantime, take a seat! I’ve got some cookies in the oven that are
almost ready!”

A “Er, yes, thank you ma’am.”

“I take my seat in the usual spot, sinking in and feeling the pillows conform
around my spine.”

“This thing must cost a fortune.”

“Fang’s dad is a police commissioner if I recall.”

“That explains the luxurious furnishings.”

“Now that I think about it, I’m surprised I haven’t seen him yet.”

FangDad “So…”

“I hope I didn’t just ruin these jeans.”

A “Good evening, sir.”

A “I didn’t even see you in your chair, sir.”


A “My apologies.”

FangDad “Don’t sweat it, son.”

FangDad “Thing about humans, as well as many carnivores, is that their vision is
based largely on movement.”

FangDad “You’d be surprised how useful staying quiet and stationary can be.”

FangDad “How close you can get to someone without them knowing-”

FangMom “Sweetheart.”

FangDad “Oh come on, you can’t expect me to believe he’s only here for a visit on
the school’s prom night!”

FangMom “No. Intimidating. The Suitor.”

“The big guy deflates a bit in his chair.”

FangDad “Point is, don’t get any funny ideas.”

A “Yessir.”

FangMom “Oh Naser, you just look so cute with Naomi in that dashing little jacket!”

FangMom “Pictures! I need pictures!”

FangMom “Oh, we should get a new scrapbook just for this!”

“Naser worriedly looks at me as though I’d let him down somehow.”

“My phone buzzes and I check to see who it is.”

“Fang: got out through the window, meet me at the bus stop”

“Anon: why didnt you have me wait there in the first place???”

“Fang: forgot dad wouldnt let us leave on our own in a million years”
“Fang: just make something up and get out of there”

“I shift a bit in my seat, and Fang’s father notices my face has a gone a bit
pale.”

FangDad “Something wrong, son?”

A “Uhh, yeah.”

“I get up from the sofa and start inching towards the door.”

A “Sorry, I gotta go early.”

“He squints distrustfully.”

FangDad “Already? Lucy hasn’t even come downstairs yet.”

A “Yeah, sorry. Emergency came up.”

A “I uhh, y’know… Gotta go feed my pet roomba.”

“I powerwalk to the exit, his chilling voice freezes me when I grab the doorknob.”

FangDad “Hold it.”

A “...”

FangDad “Roomba?”

A “That’s my dog’s name, yes.”

“It is an absolute blessing that I’m facing the door.”

“Cold sweat is pouring down my face, threatening to drip off my forehead.”

“If it wasn’t for my suit jacket he would definitely see the spreading patches
around my armpits.”

FangDad “...”
A “...”

FangDad “...”

A “...”

FangDad “...Sorry to keep you then. Safe trip home.”

A “Thanksyoutoobye.”

“The door slams behind me and I make record time out of the block.”

“My calves are on fire but I only care about getting as far away as possible.”

“Fang is sitting on the bench by the bus stop.”

“They jump when they see me.”

F “Jeez, anon, you look terrible!”

A “*huff* yeah... I *huff*... don’t feel great…”

“I take a moment to catch my breath.”

A “...Don’t put me that close to death again, please.”

F “Sorry, I forgot…”

F “I hate him so much sometimes…”

F “You gonna be okay?”

A “Yeah, I’m fine.”

A “Are we taking the bus to the beach?”

F “I’ve called up a taxi.”


F “It’ll be here any minute.”

“I notice they’ve got a backpack with them.”

A “The beer in there?”

F “Loads. Also some fireworks.”

A “Rad.”

“I sit next to Fang on the bench to wait.”

“-Three Minutes and Twenty-Seven Seconds Later-”

-- “Muffled Eurobeat came from around the corner, rapidly increasing in volume as a
familiar vehicle screeched sideways around the bend.”

“The Taxi comes barreling down the street, drifting into a turn and coming to a
graceful stop in front of Fang and I.”

“The window rolls down.”

“It’s the same driver from before.”

-- “It’s almost like he’s the only fuckin’ taxi driver around here.”

Driver “Yep. Still got it.”

“The driver turns his head and looks over at us.”

Driver “Ay, it’s my favorite couple again! How’s the leg, skinnie?”

“The driver chuckles at his own remark.”

“I briefly consider calling a different cab, but decide to give him the benefit of
the doubt.”

A “It’s fine now, thanks for asking.”

“I open the door for Fang and we both climb in the back.”
Driver “Where am I takin’ you?”

F “Take us to the beach.”

Driver “Sounds romantic, anywhere in particular you got in mind?”

“I throw a look at Fang, not really having anywhere in mind.”

A “Just anywhere I guess.”

-- Driver “Ok, Brazil it is.”

-- “Oh no oh God oh fuck. Anywhere but Brazil.”

Driver “I think I know just the spot.”

Driver “ And it’s the scenic route too, so it works out for everyone!”

“He peels out from the school to whichever beach he’s taking us.”

“Fang locks their hand in my own and rests her head on my shoulder during the
silent drive.”

--”The air freshener does it’s job and hides the smell of burnt tire rubber and my
Gamer™ B.O.”

“In the rear-view mirror, the driver makes eye contact with me.”

“The bottom of his eye curls, and I know exactly what he’s thinking.”

“His hand darts to the radio knob.”

A “Don-”

“The way I dance with youuuu~”

-- “Never gonna run around, and desert you~~”

“Fang throws their head back in disgust.”

F “UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHH.”

F “Man, you hate getting tips, don’t you?”

Driver “I get something much better, take my word for it.”


“Two songs and thirty ran red lights later we reach wherever it was he took us.”

Driver “Here we are, best point at the beach.”

Driver “Twenty-seven bucks and eighty cents.”

“I pay the toll in crumpled fives, ones, and exact change.”

Driver “Oh yeah. Skin Row, that’s right.”

Driver “Anywho, have fun, you two!”

-- Driver “And remember, sand and rubbers are not a good combination unless you
like surprises 9 months in the making.”

-- Driver “I found that out the hard way.”

“We climb out the back of the cab and the driver gives me a wink before the taxi
screeches away in a cloud of sand and carbon monoxide.”

“We have to be the only two who ever ride in that thing.”

“Now it’s just us. Alone.”

-- “On a beach somewhere in Brazil.”

“I take Fang by the hand and we make our way down to the beach.”

“There isn’t a single other person in sight. Perfect.”

“...”

“I have no clue what the fuck I’m doing right now.”

F “How about we find a spot to sit then?”

A “Y-yeah. Sounds like a plan.”

“The waves have receded far back, letting us walk along the soft sand more easily.”

“After some time we find some kind of hidden shoal, only now revealed thanks to low
tide.”
F “This looks like a good place.”

“Fang drops the backpack in the sand and promptly unzips it, retrieving two beer
cans from inside.”

“I take one from their extended hand and pull the tab open.”

F “To all those fucking losers who went to prom.”

“I take a sip and my face immediately contorts. It’s been a while since I’ve drank
this shit.”

“Meanwhile Fang chugs half of their can and laughs at me.”

F “Come on, Anon, don’t tell me you’re a lightweight.”

“Fang wants to go? Let’s go.”

A “No, fuck you!”

“I grab a fresh can and ram my pocket knife in the bottom, raising the hole to my
mouth as I pull the tab.”

-- “I immediately regret my decision as the AIDS coating the knife infects me and
dissolves me from the inside.”

-- “I fall to the ground and die instantly.”

-- A “With my dying breath, I curse Brazil…”

F “Woohoo!”

“I finish the can and look up to see that Fang now has a firework in their hand.”

“They plant it a few feet away and light the fuse way too close to the base.”

“It zips off seconds later and explodes in a red burst after a few moments.”

A “Oh hell yeah! This is way better than prom!”

A “Whaddya think they’re doing there anyways?”

-- A “Bippity boopity ya fuckin’ lunatic I’m Italian now!”

F “Pffft, who cares?”

F “Naomi got her stupid crown and is probably sucking Naser’s dick in the locker
room or something.”
“That’s… specific.”

“Fang sighs as I take another can from their bag and crack it open.”

F “Y’know, Trish had this big idea when we started VVURM DRAMA.”

“Fang sits down in the sand and I feel obligated to take a seat next to them,
suffering the moist sand seeping into my clothes.”

F “We were gonna play a show at prom and everyone was gonna love us and it was
gonna be our ‘big break’ like she always said.”

F “Now… fuuuck. Now Trish went and did all that to you and now none of that’s
happening.”

A “Eh, fuck her.”

-- F “You know, I actually did.”

F “You know, part of me thought you two would just hatefuck and be done with it.”

“...”

A “I er… that’s not happening.”

“I finish the beer and toss the can into the sand.”

-- “I scream like a gorilla”

“Better keep this party going.”

F “I just wish everything could go back to the way it was before all that
bullshit.”

“Fang takes a sip from her can as I grab another.”

A “Ha, you shaid it.”

F “Pffft, are you already drunk? Looks like you are a lightweight after all.”

A “It’sh all a bunch of bullshit. Shkool is bullshit and promf is bullshit and
err’thang is bullshit --awesome.”

A “Not you though, you- you- you’re not bullshit.”

A “Err’thin was great ’til fuckin’ Trish done did me dirty and turned it into Rock
Bottom two point oh.”

A “I ackshually had frens ’n life ‘n shit.”


A “’n not come off as a fuckin’ retard for once.”

A “Fuck Trish n’ fuck Naomi too.”

F “Yeah, fuck that bitch Naomi.”

“Fang downs the rest of her can and reaches for another.”

A “Yeah, fuck that bitch.”

F “Controlling freak, probably does Naser’s homework.”

“I bring my can up for another swig but it’s empty.”

“Fuckin’ bitch. Even stealin’ my booze.”

“I reach my hand… two hands… four hands?”

“I reach into the bag and find more liquid sustenance and pop the top and chug it
all at once.”

A “Fuck her stupid fuckin’ plans n’ try’na fix people.”

F “Ha! Now you’re wasted!”

“The fuck I am.”

“I bring my can up for another swig but it’s empty again.”

“How does that pink bitch keep doing it?!”

“Always puttin’ her nose into everythin’. ‘How’s Fang, Anon?’ ‘What have yoush and
Fang been up to?’”

“Whatta bitch.”

F “That pampered princess. Always acting like she’s right. And how she’s got Naser
just… wound up around her stupid finger.”

“Yeah. Poor fuckin’ Naser. Even if his head looks like a perfect circle.”

F “Hah!”

“Why is she laughing?”


“Meh. Musta thought somethin’ funneh.”

A “Yeah, poor Naser.”

“How the fuck did he even hook up with her ‘nyways?”

A “He’s soo worried about everyone, I always see him fretting about you.”

A “You wouldn’t believe how much that pisses Naomi off.”

“I can just imagine her now.”

A “‘Nooo stop paying attention to Fang, waaaah’.”

“The fuck’s her deal anyway… tryna ‘fix’ Fang…”

“Like… s’not her shit to fix…”

“S’not mine either…”

F “Fix?”

“Hm?”

A “Y’say somethin’?”

F “You said Naomi was trying to ‘Fix’ me?”

A “Fuuuuuuuuck…”

A “Well, uhhh…”

A “Y’know what, we’ve been together long enough…”

A “You promise not to kill me?”

F “I… what? Sure.”

A “So Naomi right, she’s buggin’ me constantly when I first got here about dumb
stuff.”
F “As she does, yes.”

A “Yeah, yeah. You fuckin’ hate her and she fuckin’ hates you and all, and she
uhhhhh…”

A “She got me to start dating you, she thought I was some super cool magic guy that
would make you normal or whatever.”

F “Wait… Naomi put you up to dating me?”

A “She tried, yeah…”

A “Somethin’ about wanting all of Naser’s attention because he thinks you’re a


screwup.”

A “Shows what she knows, right?”

A “Probably couldn’t fix you if I tried.”

“Fang’s eyebrows furrow.”

F “You think I need fixing?”

A “I mean, no more than anyone else.”

A “Everyone’s got their problems, y’know?”

A “Like me, I’m too nice to people. Too nice.”

A “And you do that weird thing with the pronouns for attention.”

F “A-a-attention?!?”

A “We just gotta live with our faults sometimes, yeah?”

A “You can trust me, I know about this sorta thing…”

“Pain blossoms across my cheek.”

“Fang cradles her palm.”


“If it feels anything like my face right now she’s gotta be hurting.”

F “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

F “How could you say this is for attention!”

F “What attention? You know this is who I am!”

A “What, a girl with daddy issues?”

F “Y-y-you know I’m not a girl!”

A “You sure are fuckin’ acting like one…”

“Fang visibly pales.”

“Her eyes harden.”

F “Did you ever care about me or were you just ‘fixing’ everything Naomi didn’t
like?”

F “Like the fucking tool that you are.”

A “You serious? The way you’re going it seems anyone cares more about you than
you!”

F “I can’t believe I ever thought you were better than any of the other fuckheads
at school!”

F “That I ever opened up to you thinking this time would be different!”

F “...That I actually stuck up for you and broke off with my friends!”

F “But you’re still the same bigoted dumbass as the day I met you.”

A “You should be glad I’ve put up with your shit as long as I have, I deserve a
fuckin’ prize or something.”

A “Not like anyone else would put up with a mentally ill schizo like you.”

F “Mentally ill?!”
F “I AM NON BINARY.”

A “YOU DON’T EVEN MAKE A PASSABLE FAGGOT.”

F “SHUT UP!”

“I try to step closer.”

“Her palms thrust roughly into my chest.”

“The momentum from her shove and the soft footing beneath me send me sprawling
back.”

“I splash into the shallow water, the stinging salt burning my eyes.”

“From my resting spot in the shallows I see Fang’s silhouette shrink into the
distance.”

“I sit up, rising out of the pool of ocean water to see her halfway up the beach.”

“She stops for a moment and turns back.”

F “Anon…”

“I can barely make out her voice from so far away.”

F “Trish was right about you.”

“Her wings shift, hiding her completely as she slips away into the night.”

“I lean back, resubmerging into the black sea water.”

“The pain, from my cheek, and in my eyes, brings sobriety and clarity to what I’ve
just done.”

“Her parting words echo in my head and I can’t help but agree after I realize just
what exactly happened.”

-- A “Ah, what the hell? Looks like someone can’t take a joke.”
-- “I raise an empty beer can and hit it a couple of times with my pocket knife as
if it were a bell.”

-- A “Attention, attention please. I have an announcement I would like to make.”

-- A “FUCK TRISH!”

-- A “FUCK TRIGGERS!”

-- A “FUCK NAOMI!”

-- A “STAY IN SCHOOL, AND SMOKE CRACK!”

-- A “That’s it from me, I’m out! Peace!”

“Surrounded by the salty air and soft waves, the alcohol finally gets to me and I
drift out of consciousness.”

“...”

14C. Prom is Surprising

“Lucy comes downstairs in a white dress.”

“The back of the dress trails down the stairs behind her.”

“Can’t say I’d imagined she’d ever willingly wear one of these.”

A “Yeah, been here a while.”

A “Your dress looks great, Lucy.”

FangMom “Oh, doesn’t it?”

FangMom “When I got the school’s email, I knew right away that the precious little
getup I saw shopping the day before would be just perfect, and I even got Nasers’
outfit while I was at it!”

Nas “I would have been fine just going in church clothes, for the record.”

FangMom “Oh, hush. The two of you look just like your Father and I when we met at a
school dance!”

“We all look at Nasers’ rather colorful getup for a moment.”

“It was somehow still less loud than his usual jacket.”

A “Come again?”

FangMom “Oh yes, I remember it fondly. Right dear?”

“Lucy’s father hasn’t moved from his seat.”

FangDad “I don’t know. Do I?”

FangMom “Oh yes, I remember you in that snazzy --banana yellow zoot suit.”

FangMom “You saw me by the punchbowl, strode right up, and offered a dance-”

F “Mom, stooop!”

“I’m trying to create the mental image.”

“Nope, can’t do it.”

“That look her Dad is giving me…”

“It’s saying ‘You’ll be upgraded to a putter if you never speak of this to


anyone.’”

“I can see where Fang gets her temper from now.”

“Fine by me.”

FangMom “Awww. But Lucy, you look so precious in that dress.”

FangMom “Oh! We need more pictures!”

“The tiny pterosaur tries to push Lucy next to her father, fighting with the duo to
pose properly.”
“I glance at Naser, who seemingly resigns himself to countless more photos.”

A “Uhh… I think we’re going to be late if you take any more pictures.”

“Both Lucy and Naser nod in agreement to that.”

FangMom “Oh, just a couple pictures! You’ll be able to show these when your own
children are going to prom!”

“A bit early to think of something like that.”

“I feel a tug on my arm and spin around to Naomi giving me a look of…”

"Unfiltered frustration."

FangMom "Oh Lucy, there's a string coming out of your dress! Where are the
scissors?"

N "I’ll get them! Anon, come with me."

A "Why, I don't even live here?"

N "It's uh… the scissors are kept on the top shelf and I can’t reach!"

"She pushes me towards the kitchen, I don't even know how Naser doesn’t catch on to
what she’s doing."

A "What’re you up to, Naomi?"

“She pinches the bridge of her nose and exhales slowly.”

N "Look, normally I would be thanking you from the bottom of my warm heart for
fixing Lucy and Naser's relationship, they're siblings and that's how it should
be--"

A "Then what's the big fucking d--"

N "Let me finish."

N "However, I don't think Lucy is COMPLETELY fixed. She's still not talking to me,
she just runs away from everyone at school now, and Naser keeps texting her-"
N "I had to call him out on it that he was slacking on his school duties, behaving
like a crass idiot like you, JUST like you. What have you done to them both?"

A “The only thing I’ve ‘done’ is support her. I didn’t do it for you or your stupid
plan.”

A “I just want to have a good time with Lucy without any more bullshit.”

N "Anon, I swear to God almighty, if my night with Naser is ruined because of


Lucy’s-"

“Naomi’s sneer vanishes, replaced with her usual false smile.”

N "But okay!"

N “Of course! You two deserve it after everything you’ve done.”

“Suddenly I feel another tug on my arm, this time Fang’s mom dragging me back into
the middle of the room.”

FangMom “No need for scissors anymore! Oh Anon, I never got any pictures of you and
Lucy yet!”

“Oh please god no more pictures.”

A “Fine but we really should get going if we want to-”

FangMom “Just a couple! I can even send these ones to your parents, I bet they’re
just as proud of you as we are of Lucy and Naser!”

“I’m sure they’re just as surprised that I’m actually going to prom.”

“Posing with Lucy is nice, but I make sure to be extra careful where my arms go in
front of her dad.”

“The searing strobe lights finally end and I can {i}feel{/i} my early onset of
blindness.”

FangMom “These photos need to have a special album all their own. Honey! We need
another photo album!”

F “MOM!”
FangMom “Oh fine, make sure to have fun at prom!”

“I glance over and Lucy’s dad catches me dead in the eyes.”

FangDad “Home by midnight.”

“I only manage a weak nod as Lucy rushes me towards the door.”

“...”

“The ride in the NasCar is awkward and uneventful.”

“Naser didn’t chuck his jacket to the backseat as a divider, so Lucy and I can sit
next to each other this time around.”

Nas “I heard that Spears might be giving a little musical number tonight.”

N “Naser, stop spreading rumors from the junior class.”

A “So that was just a rumor? Damn.”

Nas “What, you want to hear him sing some opera?”

A “I’d certainly pay to see him try.”

F “Good lord, no. My ears take enough abuse from him during the school day.”

Nas “He won’t be singing, but we did get Reed to be a DJ for the night.”

Nas “His only condition was that he got to wear that mascot costume, which is
rather odd, but whatever.”

“Everyone aside from Naser involuntarily sighs.”

Nas “What?”

Nas “Was it something I said?”

“...”
“Pulling into the school’s parking lot by the gym, I take in the view.”

“The students strung up various strings of lights along the overgrowths of vines
around the school.”

“The line to get in isn’t too long, and it only takes a few minutes to get inside.”

“Inside is about as well decorated as outside.”

“Those nerdy little chinese lanterns are strung about from wall to wall.”

N “Oh! Oh! They go with my dress!”

“Wow, it’s almost like the person who planned the entire event has insider
information on the decor? Color me surprised.”

F “Mumbling.”

“Fuck.”

Nas “I think I’ll hit up the catering first.”

Nas “What about you guys?”

A “I’ll pass, I can’t afford any fancy food.”

F “What?”

N “What?”

A “What?”

-- Sp “AND THAT’S THE BOTTOM LINE!”

Nas “The price of the food is included in the tickets, man.”

Nas “How poor are you?”

A “I live in Skin Row, remember?”


Nas “Sorry, forget I asked.”

“The thought of being able to eat like an actual human for once already pushed
Naser’s apology out of my mind.”

A “In that case, I’ll go get food for both me and Lucy.”

A “Waddaya want?”

F “Uhh, get me the closest thing they have to barbecue.”

-- A “Got you covered.”

-- “I slap down a bottle of barbeque sauce in front of her.”

N “Oh, Naser if you’re getting food too, could you get me a plate of kappamaki.”

“Wrong country.”

“Naser slugs me on the shoulder.”

A “Ow.”

Nas “Looks like we’re playing waiters for a bit.”

A “Seems that way.”

“I follow him to the food table.”

“I don’t even recognize most of these dishes.”

“I get a heaping plate of seven or eight different dishes for Lucy, and pick out a
steak for myself, grabbing a few nice looking sandwiches from the other end of the
table.”

“Wait, I have to get drinks, too.”

“Fuck, my hands are already full.”


Nas “You got everything?”

A “Don’t got drinks.”

Nas “We can always do a return trip.”

A “I guess.”

A “Hey, is this what Lucy would want?”

Nas “Honestly man, you could probably get her to eat a rock if you told her it came
from a cow.”

A “I see.”

“Naser starts heading back to where we left the other two.”

“He suddenly stops halfway through and I have to catch myself from dropping the
plates.”

A “What’s wrong?”

“Naser gestures forward.”

"Naomi is attempting to talk to Lucy, overwhelming her with questions"

"Lucy's looking on edge, I should probably intervene quick."

N “-dress is very nice, Lucy, we should go out together clothes shopping sometime!”

F “I-I uh…”

L “Oh, come on, you’re in need of new friends right now, right? Why don’t we-”

A “Heyyy, we’re back, and we have food.”

“Naomi turns her attention to the plates Naser and I are carrying.”

N “Oh! Naser, did you get the sukiyaki?”


Nas “Oh, guess I forgot, sorry. I’ll go run and get it.”

N “That’s fine! I was getting to be friends with Lucy and-”

“Lucy pushes herself away from the table and strides away.”

N “O-oh?”

“I leave the plate behind and chase after her.”

“Lucy has retreated to a back corner of the gym.”

F "I just can't, Anon."

A "Then don't."

F "God, I'm doing it again, everyone just wants to have a good time and I'm ruining
everything."

A "It's alright."

"I caught a glimpse of Naser and Naomi away at their seat enjoying themselves, I
think Lucy saw the same thing because she snapped back to me and wrapped her arms
around my waist."

F "You know what, no need to be upset. Naser and Naomi aren't my prom dates, just
you."

"She breathes in and lets out a comforting sigh. I looked around for any witnesses,
feeling very smug."

F "...but that suit does kinda stink."

"Confidence shattered."

Sp “Oh, there you two are.”

“Our principal strides over to us, signing off a few papers on a clipboard he has.”

Sp "Lucy, there you are. That ‘surprise’ you wanted is about ready.”
F “Surprise?”

Sp “Yeah, the one you filed papers for a few weeks back.”

Sp “Everything’s ready for it.”

A “Is the surprise you giving an opera number?”

-- Sp “Only if the accompaniment is your skull being used as a xylophone.”

Sp “I’m on a pretty tight schedule tonight, Anon, don’t have a lot of time for
jokes.”

Sp "Follow me."

“Spears leads us around the crowd to behind the temporary stage set up at the other
end of the gym.”

A “You signed up for something?”

F “I don’t think so…”

Sp “Alright, you’re on in ten or so minutes.”

“Lucy freezes.”

A “On?”

T "Surprise!"

A "Oh no. Oh nooooooo."

“Trish, Rosa, and Stella are carrying around various instruments and equipment.”

“Trish is visibly exhausted and stressed.”

F "..."

Sp "I'll leave you to it, you'll get in after Reed's done with his DJ bit."
A "What the hell is this?!"

T "So… Fang?"

T "Fang, we get to play at the prom!"

F "..."

T "We have all the instruments ready, I brought in a regular guitar for you to
play, I don’t mind!"

T “We can play whatever you want!”

T "What do you say?"

“Lucy is completely catatonic by this point, unable to respond.”

A "I-- what?"

T "Oh, Anon! didn't see you there! You look less dorky with a suit on, let me tell
you haha."

T "You came with Fang? That's sweet."

T "Reed's also coming! I don't know if he'll manage in the costume but he'll play
the drums!

T "What do you say?"

A "Whose idea was this?"

Ro "It was a group effort!"

St "We’re here to help, right?”

Ro "We’ve noticed Lucy’s been struggling by herself!"

“The expectant stares of the trio snap Lucy from her stupor.”

“She flinches a bit, then bolts out of the backstage area.”


“Rosa and Stella look as though they’re only just now thinking this was a bad
idea.”

“Trish’s smile melts from her face.”

A “What were you thinking?!”

Ro "E-eh?"

T "Anon, please tell me, is Fang fine?"

A "She {i}was{i\} fine, Trish. Now look what you’ve done."

A "Where do you think you're going?"

“Trish tries to leave but I manage to grab her shoulder.”

T "I'm-I’m going after her!"

Ro "Wait, Anon!"

“Damn it, Rosa pulls my arm free, letting Trish run after Lucy.”

Ro "Let them solve this, I'm sure Lucy's at a point where she can deal with this."

A "She most definitely is NOT, Rosa."

A "God dammit, why’d you have to pull this stunt {i}today{i\} of all days?”

A “Couldn’t you have tried this bullshit any other time?!”

Ro "Who are you to say I didn't? I've been talking to Lucy for a while trying to
get her to make amends with Trish."

A "...?"

A "She never told me."

St "I drew her The World and The Sun, past this night she'll achieve completion,
fulfillment. It's a good thing, Anon!"
A "For your sake I hope they were upright."

Ro "Does it matter if they're upright?"

St "What do you mean?"

St "I flipped the cards after I got back from the bathroom, Rosa what did you do?"

Ro "I peeked, The world was upside down, so I fixed it."

A "..."

St "Anon, go get Fang."

“No need to tell me that.”

“I leave the incompetent bunch behind to look for Lucy.”

Ro "Is that important, Stella? I thought it was just for play."

“Back in the gymnasium I find Lucy huddled in a corner.”

“Her hands are on her head as she tries to block out Trish.”

“Trish for her part is only shouting even louder.”

“Loud enough for me to hear as I make my way to my girlfriend.”

T "You never thought about me all this time?"

T "Seriously, say something!"

F "Trish, I can't even look at you anymore"

T "Why?"

T "Is it still what I said?"


T "I accept you and Anon, seriously! You and him are cute together or something, I
didn't mean any of what I said about you two!"

F "It wasn't just that, it was everything else, shit you did and said - making me
question YEARS of my life."

T "What are you talking about, Fang?"

T "Come on, let's play! This’ll be VVURM DRAMA’s biggest show to date!!"

F "I! Don't! Want! To!"

T "Come on, let's go!"

F "NO!"

A "Trish!"

“My shout shocks the desperate triceratops away from Lucy.”

“I glower as she turns a sickeningly sweet smile towards me.”

T "Anon, if I did or said anything that hurt you then I'm sorry.”

T “But please tell Fang I'm sorry too, this isn't right!"

A "..."

“I hear footsteps behind me and I already know it's the rest of the loser patrol
without looking.”

Ro "Lucy, you have to give Trish one more chance, if you're not gonna do it for her
then at least do it for me."

St "Please Lucy, you need to hear her out!”

T "Me and Reed miss {i}us{/i}! Together, shooting the shit, playing songs, making
fun of Naser-"

F "NO! FUCK OFF!"


Ro "Lucy!"

St "Come on..."

A "Guys, you're overwhelming her, back off for a sec-"

T “Stay out of this!”

A “Rosa, Stella. Take a look around. At this current situation.”

A “Once you realize what you’re doing, please just leave us alone and don’t bother
us for the rest of the night.”

“The two shut up and sheepishly back away a few steps.”

T “What, are you two flaking on me as well?!”

Ro “Trish, I’m thinking An-on’s right here… We shouldn’t be intruding on their


special night…”

St “Er, yeah, my reading was wrong, soo…”

T “I can’t believe you two!”

T “Fang, we’re playing now. I’m not asking again.”

“She takes hold of Lucy’s forearm and moves to take her back to the stage by
force.”

“Rosa blocks her way long enough for me to grab her wrist.”

T “Wh- Rosa, hey!!”

“Trish glares at me with murderous intent.”

A “Try again another time.”

“She yanks her hand away from me in disgust, glancing between Stella and Rosa’s
disappointed stares and Fang’s baleful leer.”

T “I guess that’s it then.”


“She backs off into the crowd.”

A “Lucy, are you alright?”

F “Yeah… I think I need to get away from the crowd…”

“I wave off Stella and Rosa and lead Lucy away into the hallway.”

"We find another corner near the bathrooms unpopulated aside from a few students
passing by for smokes.”

“Lucy looks like her entire world has crumbled."

A "Are you alright? Let me help you-"

F "Anon, please..."

F "I just want to move past it."

A “Okay then.”

F "I don't wanna see or talk to anyone anymore, not even Rosa or Stella, just us."

F "I just wanna see you.”

F “Only you."

A "It's alright. You won't see anyone else anymore tonight."

"Lucy’s chuckle is choked back as she offers me a strained smile."

F "There, I did it again, I ruined everything for everyone again."

"How do I respond to that?"

A "None of this is your fault."

"She sighs."
F "I need to go to the bathroom."

A "It's ok. I’ll go get some water or something while you’re in, won’t take a
minute."

F "Yeah, sure."

A "Okay."

“I watch her enter the restroom and reenter the gym.”

“Think there’s lemonade and stuff by the food tables.”

T "Hey, you."

“Raptor Jesus on His cross of rock, give me strength.”

A "Hey."

T "Is Fang...ok?"

A "No."

T "Tell me about Fang, are they happy?"

A "I'd say so, she and Naser are on speaking terms."

T "Did Fang say anything about me? Would they ever forgive me?"

A "Look Trish, this shit? It ends now."

A "She said she would have constant nightmares of you wanting to talk to her."

A "Maybe this could’ve been sorted out, but not today."

A "You're doing more harm by staying here, though. I advise that you stay clear of
her for now."

"Trish is getting teary, I better shut up, now."


T "It's ok. Tell Fa-- Lucy, I only want her to be happy. I won't be a bother
anymore, she'll never see or hear from me again. I told Spears to cancel the
performance, I'm going home."

A "Maybe there will be another chance sometime."

T "Bye Anon."

"She left. Oh well."

"I get the drinks and return to Lucy."

“She downs the whole glass in one shot.”

A "You good?"

F "Yeah! Fuck! Splashing your face with water works wonders, I’m good to go."

“I look at the crowd gathering around the stage.”

“Principle Spears moves to the podium set there and taps on the microphone.”

A “Yeah, good to go… speaking of.”

A “I uh… wanna get some fresh air?”

“Finally I see a real smile from Lucy.”

F “Yeah. Fresh air sounds pretty good right now.”

“I hold my hand out and Lucy’s hand links with it.”

“Walking out of the stuffy gymnasium we’re met with the cooling evening air.”

“I feel all the tension leave my body as Lucy’s body presses close to my side.”

A “Cold?”

F “A little. I’m uh… not used to wearing these things.”


“My hand leaves hers. Before Lucy can balk I wrap my arm around her.”

A “How’s this?”

F “I can one up this.”

“Right, wings.”

“Her wings wrap around both of us as a feathered cloak of warmth.”

A “You want me to call a taxi or something?”

F “Nah, we can walk home…”

“It’s a fifteen minute walk to her neighborhood, which is filled with comfortable
silence for most of the way.”

“I guess Lucy is as glad as I am to put everything that happened tonight behind


us.”

“As we round the corner past the bus stop, I let out an audible groan as my eyes
land on a particular cart.”

“It’s that same hot dog vendor from before, illuminated under a street light in the
same spot.”

“She notices us almost immediately and begins wildly waving.”

F “Does she know you?”

“I shrug and shake my head as we as continue to approach the vendor.”

Street Vendor “Well if it isn’t my favorite skinnie! And you brought your lady
friend!”

A “It’s like ten at night, you can’t get that many customers this late, right?”

Street Vendor “Hey, you’re here, aren’cha? Now what can I get for you two
lovebirds? Nothing says date night like some steamin’ hot franks!”

A “I think we’re good, we were just on our way back and-”

“{i}*GRRRRRRRRRLLLL*{/i}”

“Fang’s face glows bright red as she grasps her stomach.”

F “Er… we left before we could eat, didn’t we?”

A “Oops. Well, nobody ever misses Prom food, right?"


Street Vendor “Prom?! Oh man, I was the life of the party at mine! Tell me you kids
got Reef City’s dumb mascot?”

“We shake our heads.”

Street Vendor “WHAT?! Well you at least spiked the punch, right?”

“More shaking.”

Street Vendor “Seriously? {i}Please{/i} tell me you egged the principal’s car.”

--A “I don’t have a death wish or a car for him to smash me on.”

A “No, we, er…”

F “Got into a fight…”

“The vendor winces, but just as quickly puts on her smile.”

Street Vendor “Ooh, that’s a bummer. You know, prom was where I discovered hot dogs
were my true calling.”

-- A “You mean in the back of the gymnasium surrounded by the football team?”

--Street Vendor “Basketball team, actually, but same thing.”

Street Vendor “They could be yours too, y’know.”

A “Riiiight. I don’t think it will be.”

F “Look, can we just like, get some food? Our night’s been a fuckin’ wash.”

Street Vendor “Night’s still young, though.”

“I listen to the sizzling meat as we wait.”

Street Vendor “Look kids, Prom? It’s not that special if you ask me.”

Street Vendor “What makes something special is on you. For me I think back to the
shit I can actually remember.”

Street Vendor “Carfe’s a helluva drug.”

Street Vendor “I’m getting off-topic. Point is, the night isn’t over yet.”
“She motions to the table for us to sit at.”

Street Vendor “Enjoy your ‘dogs, think about something to do with the rest of your
night.”

Street Vendor “Make it something worth remembering.”

Street Vendor “I’m gonna start packing for the night though, so that’s enough
chatter from me.”

A “Thanks.”

“Lucy and I sit at the plastic folding table with our artery-clogging grease
tubes.”

F “Dad grills these sometimes, but I’ve never had one that wasn’t just ketchup and
mustard…”

F “Actually, I can’t even tell what’s all on this, there’s so much junk dumped on.”

A “They’re just plain chili-cheese dogs.”

A “Been a hot minute since I had one, figured why not?”

F “Mm…”

F “...”

A “She made a good point, what {i}should{/i} we do with the rest of the night?”

“Lucy chews contemplatively.”

“Not sure if she heard me or is giving a silent review.”

F “...”

F “Whatever we do, I want to get out of this dress first.”

F “It’s freezing.”

A “Think your dad will let us watch some movies or something?”


F “Dunno, maybe. We only have cop movies and hunting documentaries, though.”

A “I’m down for it.”

“After finishing we wave goodbye to the vendor and start down Lucy’s neighborhood.”

“Oddly enough there’s no cars in the driveway when we arrive.”

A “Your folks get groceries this late at night?”

F “They probably took the opportunity to go on a date themselves.”

F “Don’t remember the last time they took the occasion though. Been maybe… Three
years?”

“Lucy kicks over a rock in the walkway and gets the key taped under it.”

A “Your parents put it there instead of under the doormat?”

F “Nah, I put this here. They don’t know about it.”

F “Get kicked out for the night one too many times, you find ways back in on your
own.”

“Lucy stretches when we walk in.”

F “I’ll change back into normal clothes, hang here a while, kay?”

“I nearly sit in my normal place on the couch when I notice the armchair.”

“The now vacant armchair.”

“That’s for Lucy’s Dad only.”

“Oh how it calls to me…”

F “{i}Phew{/i}, that’s better.”

F “... Anon?”
A “Lucy, what are you doing up this late at night?”

A “You better not be listening to that ratchet again.”

F “Oh my G-”

F “Anon, get out of there before you leave your scent.”

A “Scent? You can’t be serious.”

F “Hey, it’s your head on the line.”

F “Naser sat there once and he ended up with a new scar.”

“Suddenly, I find myself seated in my normal spot after all.”

F “Think they actually are on a date. If that’s the case the house is ours for at
least an hour.”

A “Oh, sweet. We gonna raid your dad’s liquor cabinet then?

F “He doesn’t have one. Mom won’t let him.”

“Damn it. He really is whipped.”

--”Elsewhere.”

--FangDad “I have the sudden urge to murder Lucy’s boyfriend.”

A “So, movie night then?”

F “Well, I was thinking…”

“Lucy took hold of the coffee table in the middle of the room and started pushing
it aside.”

A “Er… Why are you doing that?”

“With the living room now more open Lucy approaches an antique stereo in the
corner.”

F “I was really looking forward to dancing with you tonight, Anon.”

“Double damn it. Thought I managed to get out of that.”

“But the look in Lucy’s eyes…”

“I nod my head.”

F “Yes! I’ve always wanted to try out mom’s lights.”

“The music playing from the stereo sounds positively ancient.”

“Probably one of her parents’ CDs. If it even uses CDs”

A “Wait what was that about lights?”

“Lucy practically skips to the light switch and dims them.”

“She then flicks a hidden switch that casts the room in a hazy violet glow.”

“My eyes are drawn to the glowing marks all across her.”

“Wow.”

F “Like what you see?”

“She turns back to me and the anticipation in her eyes makes me feel more nervous.”

“Shit I just remembered.”

A “Just so you know, I can’t dance.”

A “And I mean, I REALLY can’t dance.”

A “Like, quadraplegic with down syndrome can’t dance.”

A “But-”
F “Yes! I’ve been waiting since forever!”

“Her hand clasps mine, and Lucy doesn’t seem bothered at all with how moist my
palms are.”

“We move to the impromptu dance floor hand in hand until we manage to find an open
space.”

A “Right, okay. Like this?”

“Right hand on her hip I think.”

“I try to take her right hand with my left, but Lucy shakes her head.”

“Both of her arms wrap loosely around my neck.”

“Lucy’s body is pressed against mine, the contours of her lithe frame fitting very
well with mine.”

“Oh hey, those alarms aren’t broken.”

“My left hand lands on her hip too and now I can’t stop thinking about how Lucy
molds against my body near perfectly.”

F “J-just follow my lead, okay? Mom gave me some lessons.”

“I nod stiffly.”

“Lucy mutters a one-two count before taking a left step back.”

“My right foot follows and lands on her toes.”

F “OW!”

A “Sorry!”

F “Nonono. Don’t worry.”

F “Just uh… slowly, okay?”


A “Y-yeah, okay.”

“Lucy repeats the step back. I step forward and manage somehow.”

“She then steps to the side and I try to follow.”

“Our awkward steps continue like this.”

“A couple successful steps and then I ruin it with a heavy step on her dainty
toes.”

“But slowly those failures are less and less common.”

“By the third song Lucy and I are finally managing a basic waltz.”

“As the night goes on, the dance becomes more natural.”

“In the light of the various strobes I’m able to relish the moment being this
close, face to face.”

“Whenever one of the lights passes directly through her eyes they glow with the
luster of cut amber, and her diamond pupils soften.”

"There's no one else in the room right now. Just us."

A “You think it’s going well?”

F “What?”

A “Our Prom night.”

F “It didn’t go as planned… but I like where it’s taken us.”

F “I wouldn’t rather be anywhere else right now.”

A “Me neither.”

“The last song slowly fades away, leaving us in a comfortable silence in each
other’s arms.”

“Under the blacklights I can fully take in Lucy’s beauty.”


“I felt humbled that she’d consider this horrible night to have still gone well.”

“Lucy’s eyes become lidded as she leans in towards my face.”

“I meet her half-way, our mouths melding together.”

“For all that happened tonight and still Lucy enjoyed it…”

“...”

14D. Prom is Memorable

F “Nice suit! Did ya get it from the suit store?”

-- F “Yo Anon, I learned this from Spears!”

-- “Fang leaps off the bannister, dropping rapidly on me elbow first.”

-- “The pain is unimaginable.”

“Fang leans over the railing of the staircase.”

“Holy shit, she can really rock that dress.”

FangDad “Ahem.”

“Ah. Shit.”

F “Daaaad. Stop scaring Anon!”

FangDad “I’ll scare who I want in my home.”

“Fang’s mom saves me, taking the mountainous pterodactyl by his head crest.”

FangMom “Now now, dear, Anon is a lovely guest.”

FangMom “Come on down and pose for pictures with everyone, Lucy!”

A “Actually, stay up there so we can all rest.”


F “Har.”

F “Best thing to do is get it over with.”

FangMom “That’s right. Alright everyone, group together, this one’s going on
Christmas postcards for sure!”

“Kill me.”

F “Later.”

“The onslaught of flashes continues as the four of us are directed to stand and
pose together in every possible combination.”

“After a millenia Fang’s mother is satisfied, or her camera ran out of memory.”

“Naser and Fang both crash onto the couch rubbing their photo-bleached eyes, Even
Naomi is holding her eyes closed.”

“The whole thing left me parched.”

A “Hate to bother, but do you guys have any water bottles?”

F “The fridge dispenses water.”

Nas “Cups are in the cabinet closest on the right.”

A “Thanks.”

“While pouring my glass of water Naomi walks in after me.”

A “Oh, you need a cup too? I’ll grab you one.”

N “No thank you.”

N “Actually, Anon, can I speak with you for a moment?”

“Oh boy.”
A “Go ahead.”

N “I’m very happy that you and Fang are together now, but…”

“I take a long, slow sip.”

A “But what?”

N “But, I mean… Just look at her.”

N “The school year’s almost over and she’s barely changed from being that weird
punk-goth type.”

-- “Siiiiiiiiiiip. Yep. Rock Ring was a good game.”

“Siiiiip. Aaaaah. Refreshing.”

A “So?”

N “I mean, I thought you would try to make her… Presentable, you know?”

“Mmm, love me some water.”

A “Could you elaborate?”

N “But it’s like you aren’t even trying to fix her.”

“Damn, now I need a refill.”

N “Could you stop that, I’m being serious here.”

A “No no, keep going, I’m listening.”

“A quick top up and I’m good to go.”

N “Well I figured you would help her become more ladylike.”

A “I understand. How does that make you feel?”

N “Well, to be honest, I’d rather Fang not be a problem to me at all.”


N “I’ve tried everything, too, but even getting her a boyfriend doesn’t work.”

N “It’s harsh to ask, but when we go to prom tonight I’d like you two to avoid us.”

N “It’s supposed to be a special night.”

A “I see.”

N “Oh, really? That’s grea-”

A “And how does that make you feel, Fang?”

“Naomi goes white as a sheet.”

F “Well since you’ve asked, Anon, I’d be glad to share.”

N “O-oh, Fang, I d-didn’t see you there.”

F “You’d be surprised how useful staying quiet and stationary can be.”

F “How close you can get to someone without them knowing you’re even there.”

N “I-I see. Very impressive.”

F “Why do you look so surprised? Isn’t me being invisible exactly what you want?”

N “W-well, n-no, I was only planning-”

F “Oh, right! Your ‘plan’!”

F “I’ve known for months now you were up to something retarded, but not what.”

F “But I totally get this, it’s exactly something only you would come up with.”

F “Down to the whole thing crashing and burning.”

F “I mean really, how could you mess this up?”

F “Literally all you had to do was get some poor schmuck and get him to do
everything for you.”

F “Hey…”

F “You can’t get even one person to do what you want?”

F “Pretty sad, right Anon?”

A “I could do that in seconds on a certain website.”

F “Man, even Anon can do it better. Huh.”

F “So basically, fuck your stupid plan, fuck your prom crown, and fuck you.”

-- F “You are already dead.”

“In a flash Fang strikes Naomi right across the face.”

F “...And your dress sucks.”

F “Anon, you’ve got the taxi number right? We’re gonna need to leave like, right
now.”

A “Yeah, I’ll give him a call.”

A “Bye Naomi, enjoy your hat.”

“We leave a speechless Naomi fuming in the kitchen and head towards the front
door.”

“...And are promptly intercepted by Fang’s mother still holding her camera.”

“I guess she found another card for it.”

FangMom “You two look so darling together! We need more photos!”

A “...I think we’re gonna be late if we take any more pictures.”

F “Yeah mom, we need to leave early so I can get everything all set up.”

“And to avoid being anywhere near Naomi.”

“To my surprise, she seemingly relents to Fang this time.”


FangMom “Oh fine, you’ll be happy you have them when your own children are going to
prom!”

“An image flashes in my mind of me and Fang as parents.”

“A bit early to think of something like that, and the blush on Fang’s face tells me
she’s thinking the same thing.”

F “MOM!”

FangMom “Make sure to have fun at prom, you two!”

“I glance over and Fang’s dad catches me dead in the eyes.”

FangDad “Home by midnight.”

“I manage a nod as Fang grabs my hand and leads me out the door with her guitar in
the other.”

A “Let me call the taxi…”

“I dial the number for the taxi service.”

Driver “City taxi service.”

A “Yes, can you come to the bus stop at-”

Driver “Got it.”

“*click*”

F “Did he hang up on you?”

A “I dunno, maybe-”

“The taxi skids around the corner, barreling towards the bus stop.”

“In the last ten feet it slows to a graceful stop in front of us.”

“The window rolls down and it’s the same velociraptor driver from before. Of course
it is.”

Driver “Yep. Still got it.”

A “How did you get here so fast?”


Driver “Was in the neighborhood.”

“The driver --sips his can of Monster Energy Ultra turns his head and looks over at
us.”

Driver “Ay, it’s my favorite couple again! How’s the leg, skinnie?”

“The driver chuckles at his own remark.”

-- “This snide fucking driver. Holy shit. I wanna beat the shit out of this fucking
driver so goddamn much.”

“I briefly consider calling a different cab, but decide to give him the benefit of
the doubt.”

A “It’s fine now, thanks for asking.”

“This guy must stake out wherever we go.”

“Aren’t there [i]any[/i] other taxi drivers in this town?”

“I open the door for Fang and we climb in the back, fitting her guitar behind the
driver’s seat.”

Driver “So where’re you two lovebirds heading dressed all snazzy like that?”

A “Volcano High, it’s prom night.”

“The driver gives a whistle in response.”

Driver “Prom, huh? Sounds like one romantic night.”

“With that he speeds off away, leaving Fang’s house a shrinking spot in the rear-
view mirror.”

“The drive back to school is rather calm, despite the driver going at least thirty
miles over the speed limit the whole time.”

“In the rear-view mirror, the driver makes eye contact with me.”

“The bottom of his eye curls, and I know exactly what he’s thinking.”

“His hand darts to the radio knob.”


A “Don-”

“The way I dance with youuuu~”

-- “Never gonna run around, and desert you~~”

“Fang’s heel digs into the back of the driver’s seat, making him yelp.”

Driver “Sheesh, no wonder they call them stilettos.”

“The driver kills the radio, a smug grin of victory spreading across Fang’s face.”

“Eventually the cab pulls up to the school gymnasium, illuminated by the


celebratory decorative string lights.”

“I reach for my wallet to pay the toll and the driver just gives me a wave.”

Driver “Y’know what? It’s on the house this time, kids.”

Driver “Just have fun, you two.”

“We climb out the back of the cab and the driver gives me a wink before the taxi
screeches away in a cloud of carbon monoxide.”

“I offer to carry Fang’s guitar from here which she gladly accepts.”

“The students strung up various strings of lights along the overgrowths of vines
around the school.”

“A rather impressive mural of King Rex is spray painted on the wall outside by the
ticket booth.”

“You could tell how recent it was by how there was smoke leaking out of the eyes
and mouth.”

“I think about getting a picture with Fang by it, but I think I’ve developed a
serious case of photophobia.”

“The line to get in isn’t too long, and it only takes a few minutes to get inside.”

“Inside is about as well decorated as outside.”


“More lights hang from the greenery and even the ceiling.”

“Those nerdy little chinese lanterns are strung about from wall to wall.”

F “Gotta wonder who picked decorations that go perfectly with her dress.”

A “Perks of the job.”

“Fang leads me to the temporary stage on the other side of the gymnasium where a
curtain had been set up.”

“Thanks to her guitar lessons I feel like I can actually help get her set up
instead of standing around doing nothing.”

“We slip behind the curtain and come face to face with King Rex, smoke billowing
out of his mouth.”

Re “...’Sup?”

“Reed must be helping Spears with the sound system.”

F “Oh good, Reed’s here.”

F “You can get everything set up like you usually do so I don’t have to.”

Re “You got it, amigo.”

“With a mock salute, Reed takes the guitar case from my hand and promptly
disappears behind one of the speakers.”

“Only to return moments later with the guitar, now with a cable trailing behind
him.”

“Damn, he works fast.”

F “Yeah he does, there’s a reason he handles all this sort of stuff.”

“The MUMBLING.”

“Reed dusts off his hands and lets out a sigh, releasing another mushroom cloud of
smoke from the costume.”

Re “Man… I haven’t talked to you guys in ages, y’know?”

Re “Not since the whole… projector thing.”

A “...You know I sit two seats away from you in math, why didn’t you just talk to
me then?”

Re “Bro, I would but like… don’t wanna leave Trish alone.”

Re “She’s still suuuuper beating herself up over it, don’t wanna isolate her even
more, y’know?”

>>I’m sure she’ll be over it soon.


>>Wasn’t Fang supposed to talk to her about it?

>>I’m sure she’ll be over it soon.


“I’m sure Trish’ll be fine soon enough.”

Re “Fang, why don’t you try talking to her sometime?”

>>Wasn’t Fang supposed to talk to her about it?


A “Weren’t you going to talk to her about it, Fang?”

>>

F “I’ve… been meaning to, but…”

F “It’s just sort of awkward, you know…”

F “I’ll try talking to her soon, I promise.”

Re “Trish is here… somewhere.”

A “She bought a ticket? Does she even have a date?”

Re “Took advantage of my ‘plus one’ deal for deejaying tonight, dude.”

Re “Don’t think she wanted a dance with King Rex though...”

“Reed’s shoulders slump a bit inside the costume.”

A “I can imagine.”

F “Think everything’s set up now, so we can just enjoy ourselves for the next
ninety minutes.”

Re “You guys going out?”

A “Yeah, see you later Reed.”

“He waves his goodbye and turns his attention back to the mix table.”

F “You getting hungry?”


A “Yeah, actually.”

F “I saw there was a pretty big food table on the way in, come on.”

“Despite the selection of food being rather diverse and professional, Fang piles
her plate with barbecue.”

“I myself end up with a bit of this and that, bites of sushi, various meats, a few
of those tiny party sandwiches, and a few things I don’t recognize but look tasty
enough.”

F “Spears told me Rosa helped cook most of this.”

A “Wh-how? This has got to be at least a month’s worth of food.”

F “I dunno, she just did it.”

A “Is she here now?”

F “Probably in the kitchen working her tail off making more.”

“We sit against the back wall to wolf down our servings, and Fang makes me go back
to get her seconds.”

“Eventually she decides the black hole in her esophagus is satisfied.”

F “Man, were these tickets worth every penny or what?”

A “I’m not sure what those things filled with melted cheese were, but they were
great.”

-- A “Right, sit tight. I’ll grab some for tomorrow. And the day after. And the day
after that.”

-- “I head back to the buffet spread while pulling out a bunch of tupperwares.”

F “Let’s go see what other crap there is to do here.”

A “How much time do we got?”

F “Spears told me I should head back once the slow dances start.”
F “Probably another hour or so.”

F “You know what, speaking of dances, we should go hit up the floor while they’re
still playing the good stuff.”

A “What, you don’t like slow dances?”

F “What I like are the bones in my feet.”

A “Woooooow.”

“Fang takes my hand and leads me into the crowd of dancing teenagers.”

“Reed actually has a pretty good selection of music going.”

“Instead of whatever garbage was in the weekly top-forty list, he’s been playing
real music.”

“Fang’s already lost in the music, grooving along with the other students.”

“Now would be a good time to mention I can’t dance in any capacity, not just slow
dancing.”

“I can’t just stand here like a sperg, need to think of something fast…”

F “Stop being a dweeb, Anon.”

“When in doubt, improvise.”

“I bob my knees to the fast rhythm of the music.”

“And my hands mimic the reload animations from various first person shooters I’ve
actually played.”

“For good measure I spice it up with a couple dragon punch moves from some fightan
cabinets.”

“Fang seems glad I’ve joined in, she even tries to mimic a few of my ‘moves’.”

“Then she raises an eyebrow and her smile curls a bit more.”
F “Wait, Anon, are you…?”

F “BAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAAH!”

A “I’m not sure what you were expecting.”

F “Yeah, no, that’s great, keep doing it.”

F “Holy shit you’re weird.”

“At least I’m not flossing like some of the weirdos here.”

“Reed wades through the crowd and grabs Fang’s shoulder from behind.”

F “Yah! What the-”

F “Reed, why aren’t you on stage?”

Re “Autoplay, don’t worry about it.”

Re “Something’s come up, we’re gonna need you a bit early.”

“Fang hesitates.”

F “Damn it, sorry Anon, I don’t mean to leave you like this.”

A “Things happen, go ahead and fix whatever Reed tripped over.”

Re “How did you- nevermind.”

Re “Come on, there’s no time!”

A “Good luck, Fang.”

“Fang gives me a brief hug before following Reed out of the crowd, leaving me alone
amongst the sea of sweaty teenagers.”

“...”
“I should go get more of those cheese things from earlier.”

“It’s nice to eat like an actual human for once.”

“On my way over to the catering table something catches the corner of my eye.”

“Sitting alone at a table in the back is Trish, blankly staring at her phone and
not touching the plate of food in front of her.”

“I really don't pay any mind to her, my focus solely on getting to the buffet
table.”

Re “She’s still suuuuper beating herself up over it, don’t wanna isolate her even
more, y’know?”

“God… damn it, Reed.”

“I really don’t feel like playing therapist again, especially at prom.”

“...But if she’s still hung up on what happened then the least I can do is talk to
her, right?”

“After getting another plate of tiny greasy delights, I begin to approach Trish.”

“Worse case scenario I get gored on her horn, and it’s not as threatening as
staircases.”

A “Is this seat taken?”

“Trish looks up from her phone and her face flies through a myriad of emotions.”

“At first confused, then fucking pissed, then aroused, then back to fucking pissed,
all in the space of an attosecond.”

A “Hey… Lookin’ good in that dress.”

T “Y-you too…”

“Okay, operation confused trigga is off to a good start.”

“I hold out the second plate of morsels to her.”

A “I snagged these for Fang, but she had some last minute stage issues to deal
with.”

T “O-oh. Uh… Thanks?”


“I sit down next to her and tuck into my meal.”

T “Aren’t you supposed to be with Fang? Why are you here?”

A “Well, she’s got something to deal with and I’m hungry.”

T “No! I mean here!”

A “To… eat?”

“For emphasis I show her my half finished plate.”

T “Oh my fuck, no! As in right here!”

A “Oh!”

A “Because it’s prom-”

“Before her hands can reach for my throat I finish.”

A “And you’re looking lonely.”

“Ah, there we go.”

“Trish locks up completely.”

“Looking closer I can see just how dry her eyes are.”

“Man, she must’ve been crying a lot.”

T “I wasn’t!”

“God damn it mouth.”

A “Alright, alright. I was just thinking.”

A “And like. How do I say this.”

“Trish is focused completely on me now. Okay brain, help me out here.”


A “I saw you sat here. No date, no friends, no nothing.”

“Ah, bad choice, Trish’s face sunk at each word.”

A “I was thinking ’bout how lonely you were.”

A “Which is something I know quite well.”

A “Being alone and all.”

A “So!”

A “Since I’m by myself now, and you were looking lonely, I’d figured we could be
lonely together.”

A “Make sense?”

“Trish lets out a sigh.”

T “...Why are you doing this?”

T “After everything I did, you should hate me for it.”

“I sigh.”

A “Yeah… I mean, I still get called names and stuff.”

A “And Stella keeps trying to get me to watch shit with her.”

-- A “Never let her show you Escaflowne.”

A “But fuck it. I won’t have to see those fuckers ever again in a few weeks.”

A “That shit’s gonna be in the past.”

A “But…”

F “I’ve… been meaning to, but…”

A “But it’d crush Fang if she never talks with her best friend again.”
“Trish’s eyes widen.”

A “So. Peace?”

“I hold out the second plate of food to her again.”

“Trish takes the proffered plate. Her dry eyes start to water and a fragile smile
grows on her face.”

T “Peace.”

A “Cool. Also speaking of, that food’s probably cool now, too.”

“It’s a bad joke, but it works in getting a simple laugh out of the triceratops
girl.”

“I make quick work of the rest of my pot stickers, noting how Trish is ravenously
devouring them.”

“Huh, I guess she was looking a little thin. This month must have been hell for
her.”

“We sit in silence until the music changes to something much slower.”

“Definitely not my kind of music.”

“I peer over and see Trish staring longingly at the couples dancing.”

“Guess no one’s bothered to ask her.”

T “Reed has.”

A “Then why not dance with him?”

T “I am NOT dancing with King Rex.”

“Poor Reed.”

A “Well, how ‘bout with me?”

T “...Do you even know how to dance?”


A “I can improvise?”

T “Let me rephrase that. Do you even know how to slow dance?”

A “There’s a difference?”

“Trish sighs in frustration.”

T “The things I put up with…”

T “Alright, I’ll teach you.”

A “Wait wha-”

T “I want to dance, and so help me Raptor Jesus I’m getting a dance.”

“Trish grabs me by the elbow and pulls me to the dance floor.”

“When Trish finds a spot she’s satisfied with, away from most of the other couples
and open, she turns back to me.”

T “Left hand on my hip. Now!”

“Oh wow, she is short as hell.”

“I need to actually reach so my hand plants itself on her hip.”

A “Okay, next?”

“Trish’s left hand takes my right, and her right hand is placed on my left
shoulder.”

T “Now just step to your left.”

“My left foot moves left.”

T “And bring your right foot next to it.”

“Okay. That’s one step.”

T “And that’s it.”


“...”

“Wow, dancing is simple.”

“Slowly I find myself getting into the rhythm of the dance.”

“Occasionally Trish would give instructions for a new step or move.”

“One song and dance grew into three or four, I lost track.”

“But as we ease into the next song, I realize that Trish is starting to smile at
last.”

-- “And then she killed the dog.”

“*GRRRRRRRRRLLLL*”

“Trish’s face goes bright red.”

A “What was that?”

T “Uhh… I think I was hungrier than I thought.”

A “Wanna head back to the food table?”

T “Er- yeah. Sorry.”

A “For what? Come on.”

“I lead Trish out of the crowd back in the general direction of the buffet.”

A “Thanks for teaching me to dance.”

T “I’m coming for you if I hear Fang’s got a broken toe.”

A “Noted. You go ahead, I’ll wait at the bench we were at before.”

“I gesture towards the tables of food.”


T “Oh, sure. Gimme a bit.”

“She heads off and I go sit in the same spot on the bleachers as before.”

“Well then. Got some time to kill, time to shitpo-”

“*THUNK*”

A “Whoa, Trish, warn me before you jump into the chair.”

Sp “My bad.”

A “Oh ffff-flint, hello Principal Spears.”

A “Is Fang doing alright?”

Sp “Yeah, she’s still getting everything ready.”

Sp “I just wanted to have a word with you. Got a minute?”

A “Sure.”

Sp “When you first got here I noticed you were a bit on the egotistical side, if I
may say so.”

Sp “You’ve since become a fine young man.”

Sp “You were in a muddy situation and were able to get this much out of it.”

Sp “I can tell you’re going places, son.”

A “I-I see. Thanks.”

“Principal Spears leans over and places one of his gargantuan hands on my
shoulder.”

Sp “I’m real proud of you.”

“He pats my shoulder out of its socket and gets up.”


Sp “I won’t keep you any longer, I have my own business to attend to in a moment.”

-- Sp “Here’s some tickets to my next title match. Don’t forget to bet on The
Caveman!”

A “Giving Naomi and Naser their crowns?”

Sp “Heh. It’s a bit obvious, but I won’t ruin their moment.”

Sp “Alright, be seeing you.”

A “Later, Principal Spears.”

“He marches away to get ready for the announcement.”

“I check my phone to make my post.”

“hey fagets guess whos at prom? later virgins


pic rel is my date :^)”

“I attach a picture I took of Stella earlier when her date was in the restroom.”

“How did she end up with the football captain, anyway?”

“Whatever.”

“Three… Two… One…”

“Refreshing…”

“Forty replies AND revenge for that soda can.”

T “Alright, sorry, I’m back.”

“Trish slides into the chair Spears just left from.”

T “Did someone bend this…?”

A “Spears.”
T “Oh.”

“She puts her plate down.”

“It’s a veritable bake sale.”

A “Hey, you can’t have dessert for dinner.”

T “Piss off.”

“The music fades until all that’s left is chatter.”

“Spears takes to the stage with mic in hand for once.”

Sp “Alright everyone. Before we end tonight’s prom we have a couple of items to


take care of.”

Sp “First thing is-”

“The principal pulls a tiny gold sheaf envelope from his lapel and holds it up for
the audience to gawk at.”

Sp “to announce prom King and Queen.”

“Well this is a foregone conclusion.”

“A few students are already congratulating Naser as he’s led by the arm by his
handler.”

Sp “A drum roll, please.”

“Reed steps onto the stage with a small block in his arms.”

“He smiles and nods, pressing one of the myriad of buttons on the block.”

“A mediocre recording of the drumline plays over the speakers as Spears clears his
throat and tears open the envelope.”

Sp “And your winners.”

Sp “For the one Mil.”


Sp “Twenty-twenty class.”

Sp “Aaaaaare….”

Sp “Naaaaaser aaaaand Naaaaoooomiiiiii!”

“He tosses the paper over his shoulder and yanks out the crowns from a pocket
inside his jacket.”

“Spears backs out of the spotlight, giving a polite applause to the pair as they
rush onstage to accept.”

“The rest of the class is in a celebratory uproar.”

“Spears offers the crowns to Naomi, who puts the larger one on Naser’s crest to
droop off, and then dons the tiara..”

“The whole moment is picturesque, just like Naomi wanted.”

N “Thank you all so much, Volcano High!”

N “This is such an honor to receive.”

N “My, I don’t really have a speech prepared. But…”

N “In just one short year, we-”

Sp “Alright, alright, let’s stay on schedule.”

Sp “I promised your parents we’d be out of here by ten.”

Sp “To close off this wonderful night, I’ve asked a student to play one final song
for us.”

Sp “Now I know she’s played before with… mixed results, but please give her a
second chance.”

Sp “To finish up, please welcome Fang!”

“Spears puts the microphone up and gives a welcoming applause as the cheap curtains
draw open.”

“Fang is standing onstage front and center, guitar --banjo in hand.”

??? “Wait, who?”

??? “She was there last time, wasn’t she?”

??? “I’ll just start recording…”

“She scans the room, a nervous look creeping onto her face.”

T “Those dicks!”

“I start waving my arms in the air, trying to catch Fang’s attention.”

“Trish sees what I’m doing and whistles with her thumb and index finger.”

??? “Who the-”

??? “-that the weeb?”

??? “Only he would-”

??? “-match made for losers-”

“Fang notices us and some of the nervousness melts off her face.”

“She takes a deep breath and starts strumming the first notes of her song.”

“It took half a year but she finally completed the song from the roof.”

“The cascade of chords is a slow build that increases tempo gradually.”

“Thinking back over all the practice sessions, Fang fretted over what exactly she
would play.”

“Turns out, a rock ballad fit perfectly.”

“Both as a final song for prom.”


“And as a summation of Fang.”

“After all, as she plays her heart out on stage to the growing surprise and cheers
of the crowd, this song is the best representation of her.”

“Trish and I cheer Fang on loudly.”

“The lyrics we composed together were a mix of her, admittedly, overly flowery and
edgy poetry from her wall and my own shitposting.”

“Surprisingly it mixed well.”

“Apparently the rest of my classmates thought so too.”

“I spin around to get a better look at all the cheering students and immediately
fix my eyes on Naomi.”

“And she looks pissed.”

“Naser looks like he’s enjoying the show, however.”

“Not wanting to let the moment go to waste, I get my phone out and zoom in as
stealthily as I can.”

“I snap a picture of the seething prom queen before she stomps off, probably
complaining how her perfect night was ruined.”

“Shame that someone other than her gets the spotlight for once.”

“Satisfied that Fang will enjoy seeing the picture, I begin pushing and squeezing
my way towards the front of the crowd.”

“As soon as Fang’s eyes lock with mine, I catch a look of unreserved glee on her
face.”

“That same look she had during their concert at Moe’s, or when we even found Moe’s
in the first place.”

“She is finally in her element, and loving every second of it.”

“Fang’s voice is beginning to grow hoarse as she nears the end of her song.”

“As the song reaches its crescendo, her final lyrics are echoed by the crowd and
reverberates throughout the hall.”

F “GOODBYE
VOLCANO
HIIIIIGH!”
“Her voice shakes as the words trail off, delivering a meteoric --heh finale to her
show.”

“The guitar echoes for several seconds before applause begins to fill the air,
cheers that I didn’t initiate this time.”

“I begin to join in, but take notice of Fang’s utterly stiff posture.”

“Eyes wide, wings pressed against her back, legs locked like a statue.”

“She looks like she’s about to faint from shock.”

“I realize I have an opportunity here and stone the fuck up.”

“God damn it, I’m going to take it.”

-- A “LEEEEEEROOOOOYYYYY JEEEEEEEENKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINS”

“I push my way through the crowd and jump up on the stage, taking the nearly
catatonic Fang into my arms.”

“Standing in an embrace on stage, my mind barely registers the crowd of students in


front of us.”

“Fang gasps and snaps back to reality.”

“I can see the embarrassed mirth playing across her beautiful eyes.”

“No thought at all, I press my lips against hers.”

“Behind me I can hear the audience’s cheers grow louder.”

“I can hear Rosa and Stella’s wolf whistles inside the crowd.”

“I can even make out --heh Naser, Trish and Reed’s own supportive calls.”

“It’s a picture-perfect moment.”

“Wait. Missing one thing.”

“I extend one arm out toward Naomi, who I know is suffering from rectal-ragnarok by
now, and raise one finger in particular at her.”

-- “It’s not the index or pinky, or the ring or the thumb, it’s the one you put up
when you don’t give a fuck, and you won’t just put up with the bullshit they pull,
’cause they’re full of shit too, and some kid getting bullied and he shoots up his
school.”
-- “Wise words and actions from a wise ass wigga.”

“There, picture-perfect.”

“...”

“The cool night air feels absolutely amazing after we spent so long in the sweatbox
of a gym.”

“When I had brought up calling the taxi to take us home, Fang insisted on walking
instead.”

“And I couldn’t turn her down after she gave me ‘the look’.”

F “MMmmm. Feels fucking nice now.”

“Her wings flutter, and surprises me when droplets of sweat are sent flying from
them.”

A “Yeah, nice and breezy.”

“My arm finds its way around her waist, and Fang takes the hint and starts walking
closer with me.”

“In companionable silence we find ourselves drifting nowhere near Fang’s home.”

“The quiet streets of the town are lit well enough, yet provide a more interesting
mystique to it.”

“It’s as we pass by the park we had visited so many months ago that my phone buzzes
in my pocket.”

“...and Fang’s hip.”

“The startled noise from Fang’s mouth was part eardrum shattering and part fucking
hilarious.”

A “Bahahahahahaha!”

F “Shut up!”
“Her hip collides with mine, forcing my still buzzing phone roughly against my
leg.”

A “hehehe, sorry. One sec.”

“A check of it shows I'm getting dangerously close to my midnight curfew.”

“Also, Reed had been texting me several pictures in rapid succession.”

“All of them depict King Rex dancing with every girl I know except Fang.”

“Even Naomi, with a face fueled by pure seethium.”

“And Stella, with a blurred gray elbow barely in frame.”

“[i]Reedman: yooooo i got my dances[/i]”

“[i]Reedman: also swing by the hospital some time, bring my backpack[/i]”

“He really does it to himself.”

“Right, the curfew.”

“Before I can pocket my phone, Fang stops my hand.”

F “Anon…”

A “Hm?”

F “There’s something I wanted to do. Before we get home.”

A “Where are you hiding your smokes? That dress doesn’t look like it has any
pockets.”

F “Not that.”

F “Trish and Spears stole my slow dance.”

“Oh.”
“Oh!”

A “O-out here though?”

F “Why not? No one else is here.”

“I look around and see that she’s telling the truth.”

A “W-well, okay? Any-”

“Before I can ask for a music request Fang yanks my phone out of my hand and is
already looking for one online.”

“The music is tiny and tinny coming out of my phone’s ratty speaker.”

F “Okay, just like I saw with you and Trish…”

A “Wait, do YOU not know how to slow dance?”

F “I can improvise?”

“I chuckle as my hands finds its place on her hip and takes her other.”

A “Alright, I think she said like this…”

“I try to explain Trish’s instructions to Fang as we slowly move to the barely


audible rhythm.”

“And between the too-quiet music, the constant foot stomps from Fang, and my own
idiocy giving bad instructions.”

“We find ourselves in a close embrace beneath the streetlights, now just swaying
along and loving each other’s company.”

“...”

15. Ending/Epilogue
15A. Bowling for Volcano High

“I wake up the next morning with my head cradled in my arms.”

“My back aches from the lack of proper bedding, but that’s hardly anything new.”

“Groggily, I pull myself to my feet.”

“I pull back the curtain to reveal that a thick sunday fog had rolled in
overnight.”

“What time is it…?”

“Guess I’ll check my phone…”

“Ten AM, huh…”

“Damn, I slept a while.”

“...Did Fang sleep well?”

A “Fang, you up?”

“The bed is empty.”

A “Oh.”

“Wait a second.”

“My phone has seventy missed calls and over a hundred texts from Naser…”

“That’s right, my phone was on silent last night for prom.”

“He’s probably just worried about Fang, but by Raptor Jesus’ right nut man.”

“I open the most recent voicemail.”

FangDad “By Raptor Jesus’ left testicle if Fang is not home within the hour I will
hunt you down and mount your head on my trophy wall! You will RUE the day that-”

“Whoa.”
“Next one…”

FangDad “Maybe I didn’t make myself fucking clear. I will drag your sorry skinny
ass down to the station myself if Lucy is not home in the morning. I have a
particular set of-”

“I’m starting to get the idea.”

“All the texts are written in a similar vein.”

“I try texting Fang to see if she got home safe.”

“Anon: hey, you alright?”

“Anon: just noticed your dad was pretty livid last night”

“Anon: he must've been writing all night long”

“...No immediate response.”

“Well, she’ll see it when she sees it.”

“S’not like I can do much else for Fang right now.”

“I take note of the mess that Fang created, a reminder of how badly I fucked up.”

“Fuck me. So this is what they mean by Prom Night disasters.”

“I always thought it was just a euphemism for teen pregnancies.”

“There’s laminate… something, splinters all over the floor from my dresser.”

“And a check inside my bathroom reveals that The Duke managed to crack my porcelain
throne.”

“Shit. No way am I getting my deposit back now.”

“I check the controller carefully, only barely relieved that there’s no damage.”
“After I’ve swept up the bits of broken dresser I find I have no real clue what to
do.”

“A check of my phone again shows that Fang’s at least seen my texts.”

“I sigh.”

“How do I make this up to her?”

“I feel like a fucking heel right now.”

“The XROX is still running, might as well finish --the fight(tm) Rock Ring.”

“It’ll take my mind off things at least.”

“...”

“Master Grug, you mind telling me what you’re doing on that boat?”

“Ooga booga, finish this fight.”

“Guess I’ll play the next one, I really don’t feel like doing anything else today.”

“...”

“Wake Grug when you need Grug.”

“Really wish I could just float away in an iceberg like Master Grug after last
night.”

“I glance at my phone and realize I spent ten hours playing Rock Ring.”

“My mind was turned off for most of that, guess I just lost track of time.”

“I’m shaken from my thoughts by a knock at my door.”

“The door I forgot to lock.”

“Oh god, I’m gonna be murdered, butchered, my body parts sold on the black market
and turned into some disgusting rhinorex’s sex toys.”

“Hopefully in that order.”

“Before I can search for my knife, the door opens to reveal…”

F “Anon? You- oh! Hey…”

F “Uh… Why are you huddled in the fetal position?”


A “Fang? Oh thank fuck.”

“I deflate, slumping lifelessly on my bed.”

A “I thought your dad was here to kill me.”

F “Ah. Yeah. Sorry.”

“Fang sets her backpack down on the kitchen table.”

F “So…”

“Shit. Should have actually thought about what I should say to her.”

A “Fang, about last ni-”

F “It’s fine.”

A “-ight.. What?”

F “It’s fine, Anon. I don’t blame you for what happened.”

“What.”

F “In fact, I’m sorry for overreacting last night.”

“There’s something about this all that is setting off alarms in my head.”

“I don’t know what kind though. Or why.”

A “I… What?”

F “I said I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have blown up on you like last night.”

A “Even if it was my fault? I should have-”

F “It isn’t, Anon.”

A “But-”
“My words are cut off. My mind goes completely blank.”

“Fang’s hands grip my dirty dress shirt tightly as her beak presses against my
parted lips, her tongue invading my mouth.”

“She pulls away abruptly, leaving me confused and lightheaded.”

A “I..wha...Fang?”

--A “Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

F “It’s fine, Anon. Everything is fine. --♪Everything is awesome.♫”

“Her hands guide me down onto my bed and she straddles my lap.”

“...”

“Sometime in the night the bed shifts.”

“I hear the bathroom door close so I pay it no mind and drift back to sleep.”

“Eventually my internal clock wakes me up.”

“Stretching and yawning, realize that it’s a lot brighter than normal.”

“Did I sleep in?”

“The alarm clock on my table has been unplugged…”

“I reach over to grab my phone to check the time.”

“Nine-o-two AM?”

“Oh shit, Fang and I are beyond late.”

“Wait, where is Fang?”

“Her backpack is gone, too.”

“Oh come on, she went to school without me?!”


“I rush to put my clothes on and get out the door as soon as possible.”

“About halfway there my phone buzzes in my pocket.”

“Unread texts from Fang?”

{i}”Fang: ♪ Control over my life you denied,


And now death approaches from the sky,
Why'd it be me you had to vilify?
I guess this is Goodbye, Volcano High ♫” {/i}

“The cryptic message stops me in my tracks.”

“Something is definitely wrong.”

“This almost reads like…”

“The adrenaline pushes my feet back into a desperate bolt towards the school.”

“The whole time my mind floods with horrid worst-case scenarios.”

“I tell myself I’m just worrying, but my mad sprint betrays the lie.”

“As I approach the school, I notice a crowd through the haze.”

“Surely it’s just a drill.”

“The deceit is shattered when I see the crowd consists of students huddling and
crying, with teachers quietly making sure everyone is accounted for.”

“...Where’s Fang?”

“She has to be in this crowd.”

“There’s just a fire in the school that scared people.”

“She’s in this crowd somewhere.”

T “YOU!!”

“The voice calls out through the silence for all to hear.”
“Trish moves to stand a dozen feet in front of me on the pavement.”

“A shaky finger directing malice towards me.”

“She’s redfaced, streams of tears running the mascara down her face.”

T “WHY DID YOU COME HERE?!?”

“Blurred heads turn to the commotion.”

T “YOU BASTARD!!”

T “WHY COULDN’T YOU JUST LEAVE US ALONE?!”

T “NOW JUST LOOK WHAT HAPPENED!!”

T “LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE!”

T “ARE YOU HAPPY?”

“I can’t say anything.”

“Is this really happening?”

T “LEAVE US ALREADY!!”

T “YOU SHOW UP, GET THEIR ATTENTION, AND NOW… AND NOW…!”

“She chucks her phone through the air.”

“It misses by inches and smashes on the ground somewhere behind me.”

T “I WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU THE WHOLE TIME!!”

T “I WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU!! YOU!!”

“By now her tirade becomes incomprehensible screaming.”

“A teacher has to hold her back and try directing her to a nearby curb to sit.”
“...I don’t have time for this.”

“Where is Fang?”

“I gotta get in that building.”

“I turn around and dash away into the fog as Trish is being consoled by a group of
students.”

“The side door is still unlocked, and I’m able to slip in without being noticed.”

“The halls are silent, despite it all.”

“My footsteps clatter through the empty halls.”

“It’s third period now, Fang always talks about having to deal with Naomi in Econ.”

“That’s not on this floor, fuck!”

“I pause when I reach the stairwell upwards.”

“I can’t say for sure what, but my instincts are screaming at me to not go up, to
turn back now.”

“... I can’t.”

“My hand lightly glides along the handrail while I cautiously cross the stairs to
the second floor.”

“The first thing that hits me is the smell.”

“That electric, almost metallic stench of wet ozone.”

“I’ve never been in a real fight before, but even so…”

“It’s a smell everyone instinctively knows.”

“I couldn’t tell what sound I made, because I frankly don’t remember.”


“All I will ever remember from this is the sight of my former classmates splattered
across the halls like bags of waste.”

“The spills and trails of blood tell the story of their final moments.”

“Two were trying to run and still remain face down in their final resting places.”

“One slumped from a locker, smearing his remains all the way down like a puppet
string.”

“And the last one, who tried fighting back, now clumped in the middle of the
hallway soaked in the collective pooling blood.”

“It was Naser.”

“This isn’t real, none of this is real.”

“I’m just having a nightmare after last nights’ episode.”

“Things are just fine, I’ll return to reality soon…”

“...”

“...”

“...”

“Please…”

“...God...Damn it...”

“...Where is Fang…?”

“I just need to find her.”

“There’s one open door in the hall, the one closest to the battlefield.”

“I already know I’m not going to see her.”

“Fang hasn’t been in that room since she started.”


“The only thing in there is the huddled corpse of our student council president.”

“...Guess she didn’t get that ‘perfect highschool life’ in the end.”

“...”

“The stairs.”

“There’s only one place she can be.”

“One place where she’d go.”

“When I turn back to the stairwell, something makes a wet thud behind me.”

“Somehow, Naser’s still alive.”

“He’s moved his arm in my direction, and still has the strength to move a bit.”

“His eyes meet mine for a moment.”

“Disappointment.”

“Sorrow.”

“Mourning.”

“...”

“I can’t focus on him.”

“He’s got seconds left, anything I tried would just be a waste of time.”

“His hand makes a wet slap against the hard tiles one last time while I start up
the stairs.”

“Somehow, the remaining two flights of stairs have gained another several hundred
steps.”

“I haven’t seen who it was yet, it might not be her.”


“You know well it can only be her.”

“How could I have known this would happen? This isn’t my fault..!”

“You had just as much a hand in this as she did.”

“Fang isn’t here. She’s at home being grilled by her father for seeing me again.”

“She’s behind that door with a loaded gun.”

“...How long have I been standing here, staring at the doorknob?”

“...How much longer could I get away with putting it off?”

“As it is, it’s not the worst case scenario.”

“Even if Naser and Naomi are gone…”

“There’s a chance it’s not Fang up here.”

“I’d rather just stand here forever.”

“Relishing in the possibility that there’s some hope left.”

“However.”

“Time stops for no one.”

“Not even me.”

-- “Unless you happen to be a British vampire named after an Italian American metal
singer.”

“The police sirens have been outside for a while.”

“I can’t ignore them any longer.”

“I owe Fang this much at least.”


“...”

“The doorknob is still cold on my hand.”

“I turn it and exit to the rooftop.”

“In the dense morning fog the only thing to stand out is the silhouette.”

“One that I easily recognize.”

A “Fang.”

“She’s silent. I can’t even tell if she’s looking at me or not.”

A “Fang, please. Say something.”

“My legs feel leaden as I approach her.”

A “Fang. Come on. T-this is all…”

“Slowly more and more details come too.”

“The revolver that hung limply from her fingers.”

“The splatter of blood on her pants.”

“Her wings with multiple bald patches on them.”

“And the sound of her ragged breaths.”

A “Fang…”

“My fingers brush against her shoulder.”

“*Bang*”

A “ARGH!”

“Hot, searing pain.”


“My left leg crumples under me.”

“As I fall I see Fang’s beautiful amber eyes.”

“They’re red and puffy, with makeup-less tears running freely down her cheeks.”

F “A-Anon… WHY ARE YOU-!”

A “Aaaah… haaaah… Fang… Why…?”

F “Y-you weren’t supposed to be here!”

F “You shouldn’t have come here!”

A “Fuck… Because… Because I love you! Haaaaaah.”

“I struggle to balance on my left leg. The hole in my shin dribbles blood down to
the floor.”

“I don’t care though.”

“I hobble forward.”

“Fang steps back.”

F “S-stay back!”

“The revolver clatters against the concrete, spent on ammo.”

A “Fang… please…”

“A painful step forward.”

“She takes another back.”

F “Anon!”

A “Just come downstairs with me… It’s not over, it doesn’t have to be this wa-”
“With a crunch, my shin gives out completely, lurching me forward onto my hands and
knees.”

“I have to keep going.”

“Even if it’s on my knees.”

“I can feel myself slowing.”

“My thoughts cloudy.”

“The blood loss...”

“The pain is so intense, however.”

“It brings some clarity to my mind.”

“Enough that I can drag myself forward.”

A “Please, come down with me.”

F “Oh-oh god. Oh my god. S-stop…”

“The sharp bone pokes and tears through my leg muscle.”

“I briefly look behind me, the trail is spilling out and making my other leg wet.”

“Bile rises up my throat at the sight.”

“I swallow hard and look back to Fang.”

“I have to reach her.”

“I can still fix this.”

“I can still save her.”

“Fang keeps backing away as I try to get closer, remaining out of my reach.”

“Fang stops and catches her balance.”


“Her foot is halfway over the edge.”

“We’ve reached the edge of the rooftop.”

“End of the line.”

A “Fang.”

A “Look at me.”

“Her head shakily turns from the concrete below to meet my eyes again.”

A “Back away from there, please.”

F “I-I… I…”

A “It’s not over.”

A “Stay with me here, please.”

F “I…”

A “Don’t leave me alone.”

“We stare for an eternity, all through the police’s screaming below.”

“Fang looks below once more, down the three story drop to the walkway below.”

“The walkway we’d passed through so many times to get to classes without a second
thought.”

“The walkway we crossed daily with our friends through all our trials.”

A “Please…”

--A “NO! DON’T YABBA-DABBA-DO IT!”

“She looks to me again, less shakily this time.”


“The sides of her mouth curl into a warm smile.”

“The last of her tears falls.”

-- F “Goodbye, Volcano High!”

-- “Fang dabs and then does the sickest flip off of the school roof.”

“She jumps.”

A “Fang!”

“I can’t look over.”

“I don’t want to see it.”

“The authorities betray my final wish of death by bursting through the door at that
exact minute.”

-- “After all these years of tax evasion, they finally got me!”

“I drift into unconsciousness when they start wrapping my leg.”

“...”

“Three weeks pass.”

“Probably.”

“All I can remember is the sterile hospital room and an endless lineup of
reporters.”

“The whole incident made national news.”

“Apparently I had become ‘the brave soul who took a bullet to stop a school
shooting.’”

“But to everyone I know I’m just the one who caused all this.”

“After I refused to answer the constant pestering enough, I was finally left in
blissful solitude.”

“I expected a visit from Spears, or Reed, or Stella or someone.”

“But they never came.”

“I got discharged just yesterday.”

“I’ll need to stay on a crutch for a few months, but that’s hardly the wound I'm
worried about.”

“...Her funeral was today.”

“I wasn’t invited, of course.”

“But I can’t just leave it either.”

“So I wait out of sight several hundreds of feet away for the remaining family
members to trickle out of the crowd and go home.”

“The last figure lingers for over an hour.”

“If anyone, he’s the one who deserved this the least.”

“He was right the whole time, about me.”

“And here I am, defiling her grave with my presence.”

“Eventually, he too leaves.”

“The alternations of footsteps and the crutch make me feel more mechanical than
human.”

“Then again, that may be true regardless of having a crutch.”

“The two graves are right next to each other.”

“Various flowers pollute the fresh mounds.”

“In memory of Naser. Loving son and brother.”


“... I’m sorry, man.”

“I hobble over to the other headstone.”

“Here lies dearest Lucy. Heaven restores you in light.”

“They buried her using her real name. -- lmao.”

“God damn it.”

“This is all my fault.”

“None of this would have happened if I noticed something was wrong.”

“If I just supported Fang more instead of getting into a fight.”

“If I never got between her and her friends by telling her how I felt.”

“If I never bothered Fang and just stayed to myself.”

“...If I never moved to Volcaldera in the first place.”

“Fuck.”

“And because of me Naomi and Naser and Fang and the others are gone.”

“Because I’m too fucking stupid to see any of the warning signs.”

“I should be crying right now.”

“I should be screaming to the world why I should have died instead.”

“But instead I just feel…”

“My final plea to Fang races through my head.”

“Don’t leave me alone.”

“I just feel completely and utterly and hopelessly alone.”

“The sprinkling rain stops.”

“Seems the world is tired of my monologuing.”

“Like Trish said, I’m just some nobody from the middle of nowhere.”

“And the only person I ever cared about is gone.”


“The split second I thought I was somebody, I ruined everything.”

“So now, I’m back to being nobody.”

“...”

“It’s better this way.”

“...”

--“*BANG*”

--A “Reed?! I thought you OD’d!”

--F “That’s just what she wanted you to think.”

--“Reed stood with his flask held up, the cap unscrewed and steam hissing from the
carf flowing out.”

--“Next to him sat Stella, comatose in a wheelchair with an oxygen mask on her
snout.”

--R “This world is born... From Brazil. The moment Brazil became a meme is the
moment the shitposts sprang to life.”

--“Reed coughs, the carf flooding his system making it more difficult to speak.”

--R “Taking it all back to Shitposts solves nothing. So long as Brazil remains...
Shitposts... Will eventually grow to a meme ending again. And so... Our goal... Is
to erase Brazil.”

--“He moves behind the insensate stegosaurus.”

--“There’s a silent hiss as Reed closes the flow of air to Stella.”

--R “Even the mighty Game devs began with a single autist. That one autist’s
desires grew huge... Bloated. We realized too late... That we had created a beast.”

--“Stella spasms wildly, limbs flailing wildly as she tries to breath.”

--R “We had helped turn Brazil... Into a narrative. This sin... Was ours. And for
that reason…”

--“Reed ignores her, even as her movements slow.”

--“His own coughing grows worse and his voice loses strength.”

--R “I'm taking it upon myself to send this story... Back to Brazil.”

--“Finally, Reed collapses next to Stella.”

--“Finally, the memes and Shitposts.”

--“Have returned to Brazil.”

“-ENDING ONE OF FOUR-”


“-Bowling for Volcano High-”

15B. Anon and the Infinite Sadness

“After Fang broke up with me everything just fell apart.”

“I couldn’t be bothered with school anymore, instead shutting myself in my room and
replaying old games.”

-- “That’s right. I finally played my backlog.”

“Naturally, I flunked out.”

“With time on the lease running out, I had to make a decision soon..”

“College isn’t an option, so my choices were…”

“Minimum wage job, military, or going homeless.”

-- “Or, Raptor Jesus forbid, indie video game development…”

-- “That being said, I could just learn to draw and commission furry porn.”
-- “Or maybe I could become a costhot. If only I could afford a wig and a couple of
skirts…”

-- “And /fit/ can teach me how to get a femboy body too!”

“I’d rather not have stuck around town, and being homeless wasn’t very appealing
either.”

“So that November I signed up for the Navy as a PACT Seaman.”

“For four years my life was suffering.”

“And now I’m back here.”

“Plane ticket to anywhere.”

“And I picked Volcadera Bluff.”

“What the fuck was I thinking?”

“There was a simple answer to that.”

“I wasn’t.”

“Just like I wasn’t thinking on that beach.”

“People don’t change, after all.”

“I managed to get my old apartment in Skin Row back and it’s somehow even more of a
shithole than it was four years ago.”

“Only good thing out of the Navy was the monthly check.”

“Fucking ladderwells. The steps finally got me in the end.”

“Once I got my general discharge papers I vowed to never step foot on a ship
again.”

“Instead I’ve locked myself away in this room.”


“Just listlessly drifting through life.”

“Just like I always wanted.”

“The trash from all the deliveries has turned it into a small landfill.”

“I’m out of smokes, I’m out of liquor, my apartment smells like a shallow grave.”

“I really need to go out for once.”

“...”

“It’s morose and gray out, clouds hang heavy and blots the sun out.”

“The homeless litter the street more than usual in this part of town.”

“Even outside the dingy pizza place I found.”

“There’s only a few people inside the joint when I enter.”

“The entire place could be described as ‘slow’.”

“A cashier leans on one arm over the counter, the customers’ pizza already looks
cold on their plates, an ambient track plays at a molasses pace.”

“I order two slices to go and wait by the counter for the cashier to meander to the
back for a new stack of boxes.”

“Out of the corner of my eye I notice that the place has a small stage tucked into
the back.”

“Oh, so they have live music?”

“The current song ends and they shift amongst themselves to get the next one
ready.”

“The drummer taps his drumsticks together and starts a basic percussion line.”

“After a few beats the dreary singing begins and I feel my heart drop.”

“No matter how much of my memory I repress, I could never forget that voice.”
“I throw an inconspicuous glance across the room and confirm my suspicions.”

“I can barely recognize Fang.”

“A part of me denies that the person up on stage could have been her.”

“My more rational side however clarifies that it’s Fang up there, singing a song I
know by heart.”

“The years have not been kind to her.”

“The other two don’t look any better off either.”

“I don’t think Fang’s seen me yet.”

“Or doesn’t recognize me.”

“We’re a few years older now, a few years wiser.”

“Maybe just a bit worse off.”

“The cashier returns with some cardboard boxes and packs my order into a neatly-
folded package.”

“I stay and wait. Watching her.”

“Hoping for her to look at me.”

“Recognize me.”

“That I’m the only one here who cares to watch her play here.”

“Finally, her eyes cast over the audience, looking over them.”

“Looking over me.”

“Her gaze just passes me by, even though I’m the only one looking.”

“She doesn’t recognize me.”


“It’s sobering.”

“I guess that was it, it was fun pretending this might go somewhere.”

“She recognizes me, drops her instruments and comes to my arms, and we date again.”

“We forgive ourselves, and we start over.”

“I let out a small sigh.”

“I hesitate with the box in my hand.”

“Fang is right there.”

“I could take everything back. Everything that went wrong all because of that
fight.”

“If {i}I{/i} try talking to her, she might forgive me.”

“Give us both a fresh start.”

“Things could go back to the way they were, back before...”

“Before…”

F “Trish was right about you.”

“I…”

“I really should go get those smokes.”

“I take one last look of Fang, to further cement in my mind I’m making the right
choice.”

“I couldn’t save her. Why would I save her? In her infinite talent can’t she see
she’s a dump?”

“I saw it, she’s smart, I’m a dope. Yet why does she do that to herself?”

“The bell on the door jingles it’s farewell, and I open the box to eat the first
slice.”
“As the taste of cardboard fills my mouth I try to erase the last few minutes from
my memory.”

“But I know it won’t ever leave.”

“I can just picture Fang, looking like a junkie like she does now in that pizzeria,
playing to an audience of nobody: judging me and how I’m living from now on.”

“And I’ll say: ‘’Yes Fang. I live on a pension alone in my apartment, playing games
and watching movies and sleeping. it’s all I could ever want because I don’t want
much in the first place.’’”

“And she’ll probably scream at me, unload her frustrations on me, call me selfish,
and I’ll just say ‘’goodbye, Fang.’’”

“It could’ve been a painful way of going our own way…”

“...after some possibly pleasant time playing catch-up…”

“....but the thought of coming back to my apartment alone with my pizza, watching a
movie on my tv, undisturbed, with no judgement for my appearance or the place I
live, it fills me with relief.”

“It’s all I ever wanted.”

“It’s all I’ll ever need.”

“Goodbye, Fang. It was nice seeing you again, I suppose.”

-- “Never lost to time, unlike tears in rain.”

“Because I haven’t changed.”

-- “Wind blows, rain falls, seasons shift. But… people.”

“People never change.”

-- “Time to die.”

-- “Cue Vangelis.”
“-ENDING TWO OF FOUR-”
“-Anon and the Infinite Sadness.-”

15C. Volcano Highschool Musical

##park background

“Eight months since I first joined Volcano High and it felt like just yesterday.”

“The sun bears down on us in an atmosphere that’s more water than air.”

“Somehow, I feel like I’m the only one feeling the heat right now.”

“But the jacket stays on.”

“Naser finally took a day off from his part-time job working for GrubKlub, so the
three of us went to the park for something of a picnic.”

Nas "I WILL NOT MAKE THE DELIVERY DANCE, ANON STOP ASKING ME TO DO IT!"

A “At least tell me how often customers ransom your tips for it.”

Nas “Too often…”

Nas “Now stop asking!”

“Lucy tosses a forkful of the chili cheese fries onto Nasers’ shirt.”

“He jumps immediately to his napkin to wipe it off.”

Nas “Fr- gah- sh- no!”

F “Relax, you’re wearing another anyway. How and why I still don’t know.”

Nas “It’s for conditioning! Can’t stop my training routine even in the off-season.”

F “Naomi isn’t even here leering over you like always.”

A “I’m dying here in just one jacket, how are you even alive?”

Nas “Well, my skin is plate-”


“I toss over a fork of fries on the other half of his shirt.”

“Lucy offers a fist for me to bump while he recoils with half-finished expletives.”

“I down the rest of my soda to keep alive and look down at my plate.”

“Not really that hungry anymore. Should just toss-”

Nas “Hey whoa, don’t finish that thought. Gimme.”

“I shuffle my plate to him and rest my elbows on the picnic table.”

“A familiar voice, chock-full of cheeky energy, alerts me to her and her food
cart’s arrival.”

Street Vendor “Well, if it isn’t my favorite high school sweethearts! Haven’t seen
the two of you in quite a spell now!”

Street Vendor “How are you two doing? What’cha been up to since graduation!?”

F “Oh you know, the usual. Dreading the future as an adult, trying to figure out
what to do for a living. Stuff like that.”

Street Vendor “The more you think about it, the more daunting it becomes.”

Street Vendor “You just gotta let go of your expectations and see where life takes
you!”

A “Lucy makes it sound worse than it is. We’ve only been out of school for like
three months.”

Street Vendor “Only three months? Gosh, I could've sworn a lot more time had passed
since then!”

“Now that’s something I can wholly agree with. These last few months have felt like
years to me, both in good and bad ways…”

Street Vendor “So… you two have any plans now that you’re both adults?”

“The vendor’s words, without realizing it, strike a very specific and very sore
chord with Lucy.”
“She suddenly wraps her arms around herself and shuts her eyes.”

“Before I can move to reassure Lucy, the street vendor notices the error of her
words.”

Street Vendor “What’s wrong, sug? Was it something I said?”

F “N-no. I-It’s nothing…”

“The street vendor gives Lucy a raised eyed look.”

Street Vendor “Now sug, I can tell when someone’s upset, and you, right now, are
upset.”

Street Vendor “So what’s got you down all of a sudden?”

“Lucy hesitates on hearing the words.”

“She takes a second to seemingly think about what she’ll say next before letting
out a sigh.”

F “It’s just… things are changing so quickly. A-and… and it feels like I’m losing
everything that I’ve come to love recently…”

“Lucy shoots me a loving gaze before returning her attention to the street vendor.”

F “Th-there’s also… the fact that I… I’ll be so alone…”

Street Vendor “You, alone? What about that hunk of a boyfriend standing next to you
right now?”

“I do my best to try and hide the blush that’s no doubt forming on my cheeks.”

F “H-he’s…. I-I mean…”

“Lucy lets out another sigh, this one more on the frustrated side.”

A “I’m... actually leaving tomorrow...”

Street Vendor “Oh! Oh, my bad, I didn’t mean to uh…”


A “Joined the military.”

“I hadn’t wanted to bring this up here, on the last date Lucy and I could have.”

F “Yeah, he’ll be gone… And…”

F “I… I cut off contact with some… people…”

Street Vendor “Ah. You fell out with your old friends.”

“Lucy gives the street vendor a sad nod.”

F “I don’t really have any plans for the future.”

F “I… they always seemed to change and I could never decide... ”

“The street vendor gives my girlfriend a soft, understanding look as she places
down her tongs and walks around her food cart so that she’s standing side by side
with Lucy.”

Street Vendor “I lost contact with my old highschool friends as well, so don’t go
thinking anything’s your fault.”

Street Vendor “From what I see here, you still have what’s most important.”

“She gestures to me and then to Naser, who looks up from the remains of my
leftovers like a deer being caught in headlights.”

Street Vendor “Uh… You got those from [rival vendor], right? You know she puts
sawdust in the fryer to save money?”

Street Vendor “Anyway, don’t fret about friends or people you’ve lost along the
way.”

Street Vendor “I know it can be hard, but that’s not the end of the world. You
still have your health. You still have your youth. You still have your family!”

“The street vendor turns her gaze back to me and gives me a smile.”

Nas “You haven’t managed to scare me off all these years, why’d I stop now?”
Street Vendor “Oh, look at me getting sentimental like I’m my grandma!”

Street Vendor “I shouldn’t be gushing like this, your situation is probably much
more complex than I think.”

F “No, no, that helps…”

F “You’re right.”

F “I still have lots of people here for me.”

“The street vendor seems satisfied with the answer.”

Street Vendor “Don’t get distracted by the what if’s, the should-have’s, and the
if-only’s. Only the things that you choose for yourself are the truth of your
world.”

“The street vendor gives Lucy a pat on the shoulder before returning to the helm of
her food cart, which she wheels around with surprising dexterity.”

Street Vendor “Hey. If you ever feel alone and need to chew someone’s ear off with
your woes, me and my delicious hotdogs are always available!”

“Without another word, the street vendor walks away in search of other customers to
cater to, leaving me and Lucy to absorb her sagely advice.”

“Before either of us can truly process what had just happened, Naser walks up to
us, all the while wiping his hands and mouth with a napkin.”

N “So… you guys ready to go?”

“I give Lucy a glance. She returns it somewhat somberly.”

“We both turn to look at Naser.”

F “Yes…”

“Naser drives us back to my place in relative silence.”

“He stops in front of my block and unlocks the doors.”

Nas “See you tomorrow, man.”


A “Yeah.”

Nas “Well… Enjoy your last night together...”

“Lucy and I step out of the car, and he speeds away like normal.”

F “...”

“I’ve already shipped everything important back home and donated the books.”

“Even the T.V.’s gone.”

“All that remains is the basic commodities the place came with.”

"...But with Lucy here, it doesn't feel nearly as depressing as I thought it’d be."

"She must have heard this as she pressed closer to me, her head resting on my
shoulder."

A “I can rent a movie on my phone for tonight. That sound like a plan?”

F “...Actually, I wanted to look back through the pictures we took together.”

“I nod in response.”

“We curl together on my bed, staring at Lucy’s phone app boot up.”

“The summer was well spent, Lucy and I got to go all over town.”

“A well documented series of escapades, from local Farmers’ Markets to a guided


tour through a docked warship.”

“Lucy and I share frequent quips and anecdotes about our experiences.”

“Eventually, the timeline goes back far enough for some familiar faces to start
showing up.”

“Unwelcome familiar faces that quickly get swiped past.”


“As we keep swiping past older photos I can see something in Lucy’s eyes.”

“I find it hard to describe, a mix of sorrow and longing and something I can’t put
my finger on.”

A “Lucy?”

“My interjection snaps her out of her mood, and she sets her phone down gently on
the empty computer desk.”

F “Sorry, I…”

“Her eyes linger on the cellular device.”

F "I have at least two other phones with pictures in them…”

F “I don’t think I’ll ever look through those now.”

F “Or maybe I'll do it when I really feel like letting go was the best decision."

“Lucy casts her gaze around the barren room.”

F "It's not really fair to delete them though.”

F “I could just forget about them."

F "I'm good at forgetting things on demand."

“I take her hand and give it a reassuring squeeze.”

“Lucy sighs, and her exhaled breath seems to expel her mood.”

“I look at the clock and nearly jump.”

“We had been looking at all the pictures for a long time.”

“Long enough that hunger once again finds us.”

“I move to the kitchen, and look through my minifridge.”

“There isn’t much left, just some green onions, a few pieces of beef, and five
eggs.”
“Meanwhile, Lucy looks through my pantry and cupboards for anything else to cook.”

“After a minute of searching, she comes across two cups of PachyMan Ramen just a
week shy of their expiration dates.”

F “I’ve discovered a new recipe!”

“The meal prep doesn’t take too long for two adults.”

“It isn’t the most filling of dinners, but it would hold us over quite nicely until
morning.”

“With our feast finished, and with nothing else to do now that all my stuff is
packed and shipped off to Rock Bottom, Lucy and I just return to my bed.”

“I close my eyes for a bit, trying to get lost in my girlfriend’s warm embrace.”

“Suddenly, I feel a jab on my ribs.”

“I look down at Lucy, who’s poking at my chest.”

A “Uh, Lucy… what are you doing?”

F “Oh, just… making sure...”

A “Making sure of what?”

F “You know… that you’re all healed up.”

A “Lucy… it’s been five and a half months since the accident. I think I’m pretty
healed by this point.”

“Lucy doesn’t stop poking me.”

“If anything, she increases the ferocity of her pokes, going not just for my chest,
but also for my stomach and my armpits.”

A “Lu-Lucy! Cut it out!”

“I try to be stoic, but I can’t help but giggle as Lucy turns into a literal tickle
monster.”
“I decide to return the favor by also poking at her, starting with her stomach, and
gradually moving up to her chest and armpits.”

“Finally, I hover a finger over her snoot, a mischievous grin spreading over my
lips.”

“Lucy’s eyes widen.”

F “Anon… Don’t you dare…”

“I let out a giggle as I poke her snoot.”

A “Boop!”

“That seems to do it, and Lucy pulls me closer to her, wrapping me in a tight and
warm hug.”

“I return the embrace, tempted to resume my tickling assault, but far too
comfortable in my ptero gf’s embrace to care about anything else in the world.”

“As our laughter dies down, it comes to my mind that this might be the last time I
get to hold her like this.”

“I’m going into the Army tomorrow.”

“I’m going to get shipped off to Raptor Jesus knows where… And there’s a good
chance I might not be coming back…”

“It brings my situation into a somber light...”

“I double my embrace on Lucy, the more primal part of my mind unwilling to let go
of her.”

“I raise her up and press my head against her chest.”

“Her heartbeat greets me.”

“It is soft yet hastened, like it’s trying so desperately to come off as calm and
relaxed when it knows what terrible future awaits.”

“A heartbeat I may never again hear…”


“It almost breaks my own heart.”

“I can feel Lucy’s hands trace along my shoulders and across my neck to cup my
face.”

“Her angelic hands ever so gently guide me to look into her eyes.”

“She has a smile with a hint of mischief.”

“Before I realise where this is going, her finger lands on my nose.”

F “Boop!”

“Her smile widens to a playful grin and I can’t help but join in.”

“Such a beautiful sight to behold...”

“How can I resist?”

“I inch closer, and our lips meet...”

“...”

“All in all, it isn’t that bad a night at all.”

“...”

"I woke up absolutely spent.”

“I’m covered in feathers, and Lucy’s ambrosia scent hangs heavy over the bed
sheets.”

“Lucy’s already awake, and she’s bathed before me.”

“Now she’s rummaging through my fridge for whatever food we have left."

“Rather than waste time asking the obvious, I decide to hit the shower.”

"As the water strips away last night’s scents off me, I get to thinking how Lucy
must be feeling right about now.”
“I imagine what tomorrow will be like, not just for me but also for Lucy.”

“How, suddenly, she’s about to have another big change thrust upon her life.”

“The third or fourth one this year...."

"from the non-binary thing, to the band, to the betreyal, and finally to having a
human boyfriend...”

“...Only to have him go so abruptly..."

"I'm surprised she hasn't gone insane after all she’s endured."

"I open the bathroom door and see Lucy sitting on my bed, staring blankly at her
phone and swiping across messages."

A "What's up?"

F "Naser said he'll be here in about an hour. Knowing him, it'll probably take
forty minutes."

A "Ten bucks he leaves another set of skidmarks on the road outside.”

"I sit next to her on the bed."

A "What are you checking?"

F "Old messages and photos.”

F “You know, it's weird. There's not enough pictures of you in here…."

F "Hold on, let’s fix that!"

“Lucy raises her phone and points its camera lens at me.”

F "Stop smiling! You look retarded."

"[i]click[/i]"

F "Alright, cool."
"We go silent again for maybe a minute or two."

"The overbearing silence’s broken when Lucy lets out a heavy sigh."

F "...D-do you really have to go?"

“I can’t help but let out a heavy sigh of my own.”

A "Today, I'll get on a bus and it'll be a Michael Tarpit movie for a few years."

A "I honestly never thought these last few months were ever gonna end…”

“There’s a heavy silence between Lucy and me for a few seconds.”

A "It... It still feels wrong to me, you know?.”

A “That I'm still too ‘new’ at this boyfriend stuff.”

A “That I’ll never get the hang of it."

A "That if only I had a few more months of practice… maybe I could be better at
it..."

“Lucy lets out a short snort.”

F "I mean… you're not THAT bad at it… most of the time anyway..."

“I let out a single bitter chuckle.”

A "I must've been the single most boring guy you've ever dated..."

“Lucy lightly punches me on the shoulder.”

F "That’s bullshit, and you know it!”

F “If anything, I'm the boring one!”

“Lucy deflates as she grabs on to her right arm.”


F “I mean, take away my spikes, wrist bands, and stompers and what do you have?"

“The wonderful girl that single handedly changed my life?”

F "Huh?"

“God damned mumbling…”

A "I, uh.. I never really thought about it..."

A "I suppose you trying hard at being tough was endearing to me. At least when you
weren't physically assaulting me."

A "There was something else though. I knew it when we were talking on the rooftop.”

F “I wish I knew what that was.”

"Lucy cringed, her hands moving to cover her face.”

“Emotions warred across her face as she tried to form coherent words."

F "I-I can’t... can’t stop wondering what you saw in me back then...”

F "And all this time we've been hanging out, I still can’t comprehend why you stuck
around us--me!"

“I consider for a moment, and a memory smashes it’s way to the forefront of my
thoughts...”

[i]“Glancing at her for a moment, the expression on her face sort of reminds me of
something.”[/i]

[i]“It was probably just leftover embarrassment from the concert, but she seemed to
have a lost look on her face.”[/i]

[i]“Or maybe it was confusion.”[/i]

[i]“Or a mix of the two...?”[/i]

[i]“Either way there's something on her mind.”[/i]


[i]“I can't help but think that that must be how I looked on my first day.”[/i]

A “I think… I felt like you...”

“Lucy stares at me pleadingly with those beautiful citrine eyes of hers.”

A “For the longest time, I didn’t know who I really was or what I wanted to be…”

“I tighten my grip on Lucy’s hand and stare deep into her eyes.”

A “Lucy whatever you want to do-”

“Lucy, in response, glances away in what almost feels like shame.”

“Almost instantly, I realize why…”

T [i]"IT WAS {i}YOUR{/i} IDEA."[/i]

“The two of us wanted so badly to avoid the subject, and yet here I was dredging it
up and twisting the metaphorical knife deeper into the wound.”

A “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to bring her up..."

F "..."

F "...Please… Don't think about Trish that way."

F "She's not at fault. I'm just a fucking idiot..."

A "Lucy...”

A “I just... forget that I have to walk on eggshells around certain topics..."

“Lucy puffs her cheeks and jabs me in the ribs.”

A “Ow!”

“Lucy crosses her arms and lets out a single scoff.”


F "Like *I* have to be careful when I catch you muttering, watching the newest
season of underage panty shot quest and having war flashbacks fits through the
night?"

F "Oh Anon, what's wrong? Please stop crying because you remembered the projector
incident!"

A "War flashbacks? I won’t go to war for at least a month after I pass boot camp.
Assuming I pass it, that is."

“Lucy raises an eyebrow.”

F "Rock bottom, war, vietnam, you know what I'm saying."

A "I moved on, ok? Just like how YOU moved on from that non-binary, liberal, Trish-
militantism, right?"

F "Who said I did?"

“Lucy unfolds her arms and puts her head on her hands.”

F "I..."

F "[i]*sigh*[/i]"

F “I didn't work out as a tough person, I didn't work out as a big musician, and I
sure as hell didn't work out as a lover, given how many exes I have..."

F "This whole thing with making everyone's lives around me hell, testing the waters
with identifying my gender… it was a complete disaster..."

F "You can't really compare the damage I did to myself to you jerking off to
cartoons, okay?!"

“Lucy’s eyes widen in horror as she facepalms and falls back on the bed.”

F "...Fuck... I might have said too much…”

F “I already ruined our last day together with stories from when I was just a shit
person..."

“Lucy’s eyes start to shimmer.”


A "Hey! It's fun to compare!”

A “I still like you, so I guess girls have it easier."

“Lucy picks herself up and gives me a narrowed-eyed stare.”

F “You just ‘like’ me?”

"Her eyes droop, and so do her shoulders."

"I'm not certain if she's serious."

"But suddenly she tosses herself into my arms.”

“She puts her whole weight into her embrace, almost like she wants to tackle me.”

“I try to hold us both upright, but the awkward angle and the unevenness of the bed
eventually causes us both to fall back into bed.”

“The world really disappears when we're like this. Something I’m infinitely glad
for..."

F "Anon... do you like me better the way I was before…”

F “Or do you like me better for who I am now?"

“I say my next words without hesitation.”

A "You're much better now.”

A “Not cutting weeds in my eyes and kicking me in the face."

A "Though I guess you miss your old life.”

A “I must feel like a killjoy in comparison..."

"Lucy slides her head over my shoulder and wraps her arms up from underneath me."

F "I don't care about that."


F "This is so much better."

F "I don't like being forced to care about something I'm usually indifferent
towards, or pay attention to what someone thinks is more important than what I'm
already thinking about."

F "I just wanna...figure it out on my own, you know?"

A "If you're talking about me wanting us to marathon Lucky Star, then fine, I'll
stop."

“Lucy pulls away from our embrace just enough for me to see the red of her cheeks
and tears streaking from her eyes.”

F "Y-you.. fucking dork!"

“I let out a small chuckle as I wipe away some of her tears.”

A "I just like seeing you ramble."

A "You'll find stuff that interests you.”

A "Just do you, Lucy!"

"Our foreheads touch.”

“She grabs my face with both her hands, all the while looking at me like I’m the
most precious thing in her life.”

“All I want to do is bring her closer to me."

"I wanna keep picking apart her brain, become acquainted with every single corner
of her mind and still realize there's always something more to her..."

"I love you, Lucy. So very, very much."

F "Anon, I… I love you."

F “So very, very much…

“...”
“Naser somehow manages to defy our expectations by being late for once.”

“But that’s good, as it gives Lucy and I a chance to spend the next ten minutes
gathering the last of my belongings and trashing what I couldn’t take.”

“With the apartment cleaned and cleared, I leave the keys on the kitchen counter,
sparing one last look at the place I called home for the last few months.”

“As much as it sucked, the tiny excuse of a flat had been my sanctuary.”

“Now that I was leaving it, a part of me felt like I was losing a friend.”

“I try not to think too much about it as Lucy and I make our way outside.”

“Naser isn’t here yet, so we end up standing by the apartment lobby with nothing
but our thoughts.”

“A part of me thanked Naser for his lateness.”

“It gave Lucy and I some more time together.”

“Lucy’s the first to speak up and break the silence between us.”

F "...What am I going to do when you're gone?"

“Lucy’s words surprise me, but I’m ready with an answer this time.”

A “You'll make the right choices."

A "You're the only smart person I know.”

“Lucy gives me a deadpan look.”

F "I’m being serious here, Anon."

A "So am I, Lucy.”

A “You're a goddamn Intellectual!"


"Lucy bashfully turns her head away, appreciating the compliment."

F "You know, the guys in the army aren't the smartest lot."

A "I'll manage."

F "I don't know if I'm supposed to be jealous or fearful."

"Lucy begins snickering."

F "They're gonna send you back in a shoebox!”

F “Hahahahahahaha!"

“I can’t help but roll my eyes at Lucy’s words.”

A "Thanks for having *so much* faith in me..."

“Subconsciously, I let out a sigh.”

A “I know you’ll have plenty of fun getting back to your own life, especially since
there’s no semester in the fall to hold you back.”

F "Eh, the mosh pits will not be as entertaining without you fumbling around
awkwardly in them."

A "I could do without them.”

A “You, on the other hand, seem eager to go back to that."

F "What do you mean?

A "Back to the mosh pits, meeting strange people, having fun, maybe going for that
solo career I know you can achieve."

A "You should leave your options open while I'm gone."

A "I don't want to hold you back or make you waste time waiting for me."

A "...We might not even see each other again..."


A “...”

A “I…”

A “I don't want to hold you back or make you waste time waiting for me..."

A "...We might not even see each other again..."

A "But... I'll never forget you, Lucy..."

F "..."

"Lucy stirs like she just got stabbed in the heart."

F "Fuck... that hurts like hell..."

F "It's... I....”

F “Damn it, Anon..."

F “...”

“Lucy grits her teeth in anger.”

F “I'm sorry, about all my bullshit!"

F "Please! T-that’s… that’s not me anymore…”

F "I can't go back to being that thing!"

“I move to place a hand on Lucy’s shoulder.”

A “Lucy…"

“Lucy lets out a sigh.”

F "Anon… I wouldn't feel right going back to how I used to be.”

F “It's not right.”


F "It was just a phase! I swear!”

F "I thought what I was doing was completely normal!"

F “It was so humiliating..."

F "Naser probably knew... and he suffered so much because of it...”

F "I can't imagine just how much more my parents would've hated if I stuck to
being... being...”

F "I don't even know who I used to be now."

F “I… I was just an ungrateful bitch..."

“Lucy lets out a groan and facepalms.”

F "I don't know if I'll ever live this shit down!"

F "Anon, please say you don't think less of me now I've told you all this..."

F "I'm more than all that!”

F “I wanna show it to everyone that matters to me!"

“I reach out and grab Lucy’s hand, squeezing it as tight as I can without causing
her discomfort.”

“I consider saying something, but I ultimately decide against it.”

“Instead, I only stare deeply and softly into Lucy’s citrine eyes.”

“Before I can do anything else with my girlfriend, I hear the sound of tire
screeching and the roar of an engine.”

“A familiar gray-toned car pulls up right next to us, stopping so abruptly that it
leaves a set of skid marks.”

“Lucy reaches into her pocket and pulls out a ten dollar bill.”
“I motioned for her to keep it.”

“Something told me that where I was going, I wouldn’t be needing money.”

“Soon as the car comes to a complete stop, it’s driver disembarks, all the while
munching on the remains of a delectable-looking hot dog.”

Nas “Sorry I’m late guys. Decided to stop by Tracy’s hot dog cart to get something
to eat, but she took a bit longer than usual.”

“Naser chomps on the last of this meal and licks his fingers clean with a satisfied
smile.”

Nas “Anyway, you two ready to go, or do you guys need a few more minutes?”

“I look at the time on my phone.”

“Much as I wanted time to stand still, the bus departing to boot camp would be
leaving in less than an hour.”

“I give Fang one last look, and she in turn looks at me.”

“We both know what needs to happen next.”

“Doesn’t make it any less painful…”

“Without another word, Lucy and I get in the back of the NasCar.”

“Naser, without a moment of hesitation, floors the gas pedal, and he flies off down
Skin Row’s small streets.”

“A part of me bids my old neighborhood--shitty as it was--a final farewell.”

“The drive towards the pick-up spot is quiet.”

“Not one of the three of us wants to say a word.”

“Fifteen minutes of silent driving, and we arrive at my designated pick-up


location.”

“The three of us get out of the NasCar and stand around the bus stop, waiting for
the inevitable.”

“Lucy mentioned needing to do something, heading into the office.”

“The silence between Naser and I is deafening.”

“Naser suddenly clears his throat.”

Nas “Listen, Anon…”

A “Yeah?”

Nas “Uhh… you’re gonna be gone for a while.”

A “... Yeah.”

Nas “Yeah.”

Nas “...”

Nas “So uh… rifleman or infantry or whatever it’s called?”

A “Huh?”

Nas “What’re they gonna make you do? Something like digging ditches? N-not to come
off as rude or anything.”

“I sigh and shake my head.”

“At least he was starting to catch his poor words now.”

A “I mean, yeah, I’ll be doing that too. But they had me take an ASVAB test. They
want me to do some more mechanical stuff.”

A “I think the code thing was 12K… 19K?”

A “They were pushing me into being a tank guy.”

Nas “Can you even drive dude?”


A “...”

A “Anyway, I decided something more up my alley.”

“It’s kind of like shitposting. But more official. I think.”

Nas “What’s shitposting?”

A “N-nevermind. The number thing is 46R.”

“Naser nods his head and looks off.”

“Before the silence could set in again Naser speaks up, his voice carrying a tone
of relief.”

Nas “I’d been meaning to say for a while.”

Nas “Thanks, Anon. I mean it.”

Nas “I didn’t know what I was doing for a while.”

Nas “If you didn’t take the hit and get us together at Moe’s, I’d still be feeling
sorry for myself like some loser.”

Nas “Honestly… I’d still be that scared little kid stressing over being something I
didn’t need to be.”

A “I didn’t do much at all, it was Moe and Rosa really.”

A “It was you and Lucy that patched things up. And I’m glad you guys made amends.”

“Naser gives me a surprised look, but he smiles and nods.”

“We hear the unmistakable roar of a city bus overpowering the other cars as it
turns onto the street.”

“It’s still a few lights away though, so Naser gets back in the drivers’ seat to
leave Lucy and I alone.”

"Lucy had come back at some point. I was kind of happy she kept quiet to give me
and Naser our moment.”
“All this time we avoided saying goodbye to each other but eventually it has to
happen"

A "Lucy."

F "Anon..."

=====================THIS BIT REPLACES THE FLASHBACK ON THE C


ENDING================

"A horrifying tugging pain hits me in the chest."

A "You'll be fine while I'm gone, right?"

F "Yeah."

"I seriously have no idea what's gonna happen to her. I reprehend any thought that
something bad might happen to her."

"But still..."

A "Can you promise me that..."

A "...If I do see you again, that you'll be a better person."

A "Us both. Better persons."

F "ok"

F "I'll be a better person."

F "But you have to promise me something too."

F "That you'll come back."

"I mutter"

A "ok"

"She mutters"
F "Ok. good."

"It's settled, then."

=====================THIS BIT REPLACES THE FLASHBACK ON THE C


ENDING================

"We hugged once again, but she put some serious muscle into it. I reciprocate."

"I want to feel the imprint of this embrace for hours."

"Her heart's racing."

"Stronger."

"The bus driver grows impatient and starts honking. The time has come."

"Sure enough, I was still feeling Lucy's hug after we separated. Naser rolls down
the window of the car."

Nas "Good luck, man."

A "Same, man."

"I gripped his hand."

"He squeezed my hand in return, and then recoiled. My grip was stronger than he was
anticipating."

"I got inside and waved back at them. I give the driver my regards and laid back,
looking at my feet."

"I must've thought about a lot of things then, like what if I just jumped out the
window and ran to her,”

“or if I would die and never see her again like in that green day music video, I
looked back to see if I could still get a glimpse of her..."

"...my eyes frantically search the small figures, and there she was.”

“I caught her in mid-motion, crying in Naser's shoulders.”


“And then the bus rounds a corner and they’re gone."

“Vanished from each others’ lives.”

"I was dropped at a hotel with the other dudes, a surprisingly diverse crowd of
humans and dinosaurs conversed.”

“We waited there for another bus that took us to an airport."

"I think I might have slept as soon as I sat on the airplane seat, because I don't
remember the take-off or the drill."

"I was fortunate enough to get a seat by the window, I flipped it up and saw a
desert with a two-lane road cutting through."

"I don't even know where I am now, only that I'm nowhere near Lucy."

"God I hope I see her again."

“-Three years later-”

“Volcadera Bluffs. New duty station. Recruiting teens to suffer just like I did.”

“Good times, good times.”

-- “Especially when I saw Osaurus Bin Laden go out like a bitch.”

-- “Say what you will about the guy, at least he had good taste in games and
anime.”

“With my rucksack on my back and a cheap rolling case at my side I make my way down
to my old stomping ground for some cheap living.”

“Three years. I wonder if Lucy still lives here.”

“There’s new buildings in the Galleria. Not to mention it’s gotten even more
labyrinthine.”

“The sun reflecting off the mirror polished windows are baking me alive in my
JDUs.”
“Thinking back, I think there’s a park nearby that has a decent vending machine.”

“Mentally retracing my steps from my senior year I manage to find the park.”

“Looks like they’re holding some kind of festival, with all the booths set up and
tyranno tykes running around.”

“There’s an unoccupied picnic bench, miraculously, so I set my heavy bags carrying


my entire life down and pop open my water bottle.”

“Sitting here, I can’t help but reminisce about the last time I was here.”

“There’s an awful lot I left behind here.”

“Like my highschool sweetheart.”

“The dicks in my old platoon never did believe me.”

“Then again I didn’t want to show that photo album her mom gifted me.”

“Raptor Jesus, I miss her.”

“I wonder if she remembers that promise.”

F “Anon?”

“Hm?”

“I look up to see a pterodactyl in a floral print dress running full tilt towards
me.”

F “ANON! YOU REMEMBERED!”

“What.”

“I stand up and prepare to take her down.”

“I am poorly prepared however.”

“She lunges at me and before I think to grab my cheap ass kabar her beak mashes
roughly against my lips.”
“What.”

“I curse my instincts as my hands reflexively hold my amorous attacker by her


hips.”

“Wait.”

“I pull back, both for air and to figure out if this is who I think it is and not
some well dressed sexual harassing lady-hobo.”

A “Lucy..?”

F “You remembered our promise!”

“Right. Right.”

“Yeah, the promise…”

A [i]"Can you promise me that..."[/i]

A [i]"...If I do see you again, that you'll be a better person."[/i]

A [i]"Us both. Better persons."[/i]

F [i]"ok"[/i]

F [i]"I'll be a better person."[/i]

F [i]"But you have to promise me something too."[/i]

F [i]"That you'll come back."[/i]

[i]"I mutter."[/i]

A [i]"ok."[/i]

[i]"She mutters"[/i]

F [i]"Ok. good."[/i]
[i]"It's settled, then."[/i]

A “That I’d come back and be with you. How could I forget?”

“I finally have a chance to take Lucy in.”

“Gone is the halter top, torn jeans, and spiky hornband.”

“In their place, a simple golden sun dress and a large red ribbon tied around her
head crest, looking for the world like a pair of red bunny ears.”

“Her hands remain on my shoulders, and I can see that she’s checking me out now.”

“I’m proud to say I’m no longer a lanklet, especially with how my uniform blouse’s
rolled up sleeves feel like they’re cutting off the blood flow to my hands.”

F “You’ve really changed since I last saw you, Anon!”

F “I’m so glad you’re safe after all these years!”

F “I got so worried for you, what if something happened overseas…”

F “What if you got lost or hurt...”

F “What if you never returned at all…”

A “Hey, have more faith in me.”

A “I still got all my limbs, right?”

A “I didn’t get bruised too bad.”

A “Like uhh, remember that time I fell down the stairs?”

A “I’m pretty indestructible, yeah?”

“...Maybe I’ll wait before showing her my scars.”

F “Wow, you’re pretty amazing…”


A “What’ve you been up to?”

F “Oh, I got my Associates and then-”

??? “MIIIISSSS LUCCYYYYYYYY!!!”

“Fang shrugs.”

F “And then this.”

“A little T-rex runs up to the table.”

??? “MISS LUCY!! MISS LUCY!!”

F “Now Vince, there’s no need to yell this close.”

F “What’s wrong?”

??? “I was playing with Jared and he said, he said that earthquakes happen when my
mommy gets out of bed!!”

??? “Tell him it’s not true!!”

A “Tell him that his mom has a secret daddy she doesn’t tell anyone about.”

F “Anon!”

??? “Okaaay!”

F “Oh no you don’t.”

F “JARED, GET OVER HERE.”

“After clearing up the squabble, Lucy slumps over the picnic table again.”

A “Want me to get you a water bottle or something?”

F “No thanks, I had lemonade earlier.”


F “The fair’s some annual town hunting celebration, this year the people in charge
had extra funding.”

F “So today they’re letting the local schools have a field trip here free of
charge.”

A “... Need another chaperone?”

F “I’d love to, but parents get really upset about this sort of thing.”

F “You have to be qualified and certified to look after these guys.”

A “Oi naehd a choild moindin’ loicence, yeh? Pray-ay bonkahs, yeh.”

“I chuckle aloud at my own silly accent. Lucy’s giggles echo my mirth.”

“Lucy’s giggles slowly melt away and a trickling tear leaves from her eye.”

F “You’re really back…”

“Her arms wrap around me tightly, as if afraid I’ll disappear at any moment.”

“My hand rubs comforting circles across her back, soothing her.”

A “Yeah. I’m back, Lucy.”

A “I’m surprised you waited for me here.”

F “Of course. That promise means the world to me, Anon.”

“We stay embraced in the hot sun for just a moment longer before I let go again.”

“Lucy’s gaze lingers on the children, her eyebrows knit together in contemplation.”

F "Look at them, Anon."

"Fang points toward the kids screaming and falling over each other."

F "We were all like this at some point."


A “Stupid?”

F “Yeah- no, I mean careless. Innocent.”

A “Suppose we were.”

"She lets out a sigh.”

F "One day they’re gonna start thinking and doing all the wrong things we thought
and did when we were teenagers..."

F "I wish I could stop it from happening. They're perfect just like this."

A "Kids can be --cruel, Jack mean to each other."

F "But not cruel. The world makes them cruel."

F "Until then...they're free. We gotta protect their freedom. Save them from our
mistakes."

“That’s quite a statement to hear from her.”

A "You've changed."

“I think now would be a good time for a segue.”

--A “Holy crap Lucy, it’s Alex YIIK.”

A "I'm glad to see you're doing good. How’s everyone else?”

F “Everyone else?”

A “Y’know, Naser, Trish, Naomi, Reed, all those guys?"

F "Oh! Naser went to medical school..."

“She closes her eyes as though trying to recall a lost memory.”

F “I haven’t seen Naomi, though.”


A "And the others?"

F "Haven't seen them since either."

F “But you’re here now!”

F “And now that you’re back, I’m never letting you go again.”

A “I’m not going anywhere… Sweet Tooth.”

“Lucy rolls her eyes.”

F “You know, if you had said that back then I’d have hit you.”

A “Yeah, and then I’d have just done it again because you’re cute when you’re
annoyed.”

A “I guess we’ve both changed since then.”

F “Oh yeah? How so?”

A “I mean, when I first enrolled I had every intention of just laying low and not
sticking out.”

A “I didn’t care about making friends as long as it suited that goal.”

A “As long as I didn’t get bullied any more, I was glad to just blend in.”

F “Guess that plan fell apart.”

A “It did, yeah.”

A “I kinda blame you for that development.”

-- A “Although I would have gotten away clean with it, if it wasn’t for that
meddling purple triceratops.”

F “Ha, I made you care about people.”

A “You did.”
“A few kids chase each other around the table.”

A "You get any break time today?”

A “I'd love to check out the town, see what else is different.”

F “I’d love to! I’ll go ask, I might get a few minutes to step away.”

A “Yeah, and we could go and check Volcano High again, for old time's sake."

“She freezes for a second.”

F "I-I’d rather not Volcano High. Too many bad memories.

"Lucy ended up getting the rest of the day off from her supervisors, I was
surprised by how understanding they were once they saw me."

F "They said I deserve it after a hard day's work."

A "You do look exhausted dealing with the ankle biters."

F "Not at all! Truth be told, Anon. I love doing what I do."

“...”

"Catching up with Lucy was the happiest I felt in years, the memories came rushing
back as we walked under the hot sun."

A “So you don’t know at all how Reed and Trish are doing?”

F “OH! ...When was the last time I spoke with them…?”

A “Hope Trish is alright, the two of you were friends for the longest time.”

F “I guess I… Didn’t feel the need to see them again?”

F “Looking back, they were terrible influences.”

A “I guess so...”
A "And Stella and Rosa?"

F "Haven't seen them either."

A "Seems weird, considering Rosa was of such help to us."

F "Don't get me wrong, Anon. I love what Rosa did for me, Naser and you, but I
guess I...just didn't need to see her anymore."

F "I didn't want to see anyone else, for that matter."

F "You must've had friends in the army, back at rock bottom, or even before that,
right?”

F “They're gone from your life too, there's nothing wrong with that.”

A "Haven't you looked for them?"

F "I don't want to."

“The scenery here seems familiar..."

“Oh, this is my old path to school. Maybe I will get to see it after all.”

F ":-let's turn away. To Moe's, or somewhere."

A "Aww, I wanted to see the school again though."

F "NO, Anon."

A "..."

F "Seems like we just repeat each other, I get upset over nothing, and I
apologize."

F "Sorry, I just… don't want to remember Volcano High, I just…”

F “I did too much dumb stuff there, you know?"


F "I just want to forget all that happened."

A "Moe’s is fine, too. I do want to see how that fossil is doing."

F "Er, actually, Moe retired! He sold his franchise."

A "Oh. Well, we can still go check it out."

"It took a while to get there, getting to be nearly five when we arrived at Moe's,
we ordered our usual and picked a table.”

“I can see the old piano in my peripheral vision."

A "I’ve been asking so much about what you’re doing now, but what happened while I
was away?"

F "I remembered your promise.”

F “I tried improving myself, like, really tried.”

F “But things kept getting difficult. For a while I gave up.”

F “There were times I’d cry. I would think back to when you were here and miss you
so much."

F "I...don't wanna worry you with the details of what I did during that time, but…”

F “I guess I realized something."

F "All this time I was a huge dick to my family, I idealized things too much and
lashed out at them for not being on the same page as me."

F "I wanted to be a rockstar, so I wanted them to behave a certain way I think it


would fit for that lifestyle."

F "I was being unfair and unrealistic towards them, I wanted them to hate me and
somehow that was gonna further my career.”

F “Looked like it worked for a lot of famous people."

F "I didn't want to make my family sad anymore, so I just did what I've always
should have done and learned to love them, to thank them for all they did for me."
A "So you kept playing? I'd love to see what else you've composed over the years.
I'm sure it's great."

F "No...I just gave that up."

A "What? Really? It was such a huge part of you!"

F "I didn't need it anymore, plus it reminded me too much of Trish, I've put away
the instruments somewhere and never played anything ever again."

A "Then what have you been doing all these years?"

F "Dad needed help with a charity event, he bought food and he needed me to help
him carry it around since Naser was away in college."

F "I thought it was just going to be a boring evening with a bunch of brats, but I
saw something..."

F "I saw the children, they ran around me, they offered me toys to play with, I
joined them."

F "I lifted them from the ground, some clung to my legs as I moved about-"

F "No one ever played with me like that, no one ever approached me like that, it
was so pure, so innocent."

A "Should have shown them a picture of you in your high school clothes"

F "THAT would be hilarious."

F "But yeah, I enjoyed my time with the children so much...I asked around in my
church and eventually I got a gig dealing with preschoolers."

"She looks so happy right now. I feel like I would ruin the mood to bring up Trish,
Reed and the others again."

A “Y’know, part of me expected you to forget about the whole promise.”

A “That I’d come back and some lucky dino guy had already swept you off your feet.”

“She just smiles and gives a small laugh.”


F “The amount of guys I had to tell that my boyfriend was -- a Navy SEAL who knew
over 300 ways to kill them with his bare hands just deployed and coming home soon…”

"She begins stroking my hand on the table."

F “Anon, I’d never forget about you or our promise.”

"Part of me is glad she's saying this to me, but I still have too many questions."

"It's weird because I know she’s happy, she looks happy in her work, and she's glad
I'm here..."

“But something deflates the moment, I don't know what it is."

"I look towards the decorative piano Moe always had in the corner."

A "Look Fang, the piano."

F "What about it?"

A "You think they’d let us play it?"

F "I don't know, it's probably out of tune..."

A "Might be worth a shot, come on."

F "But you can't play..."

A "Then {i}you{/i} play."

"As we sit by the piano, I think she understands why I'm teasing her like that."

"I open the lid, the keys look rather pristine."

F "Anon, I-"

"Her fingers lightly roll across the keys"

"She retracts herself."


F "I haven't played in a long time...I don't know if I can still do it."

A "I bet you still remember how to do it."

"She positions her hands just above the keys."

F "I haven't done this in years. I don't even know which song to play."

A "I wanna see you play, that's all. I wanna hear you after all this time away."

F "Alright."

"She gave out a sigh, but then..."

F "What to play?"

"Her eyes seem to glimmer for a moment."

F "I know."

F "Remember this?"

F "It was our song, remember?"

F "We made it together."

F "Ha! I still got it!"

F "I always thought of this melody when I thought about you..."

F "Guess I never forgot how to do it.Thought I'd be rusty with the piano."

A "You play beautifully."

F "...Thank you..."

"I sit closer to Lucy, she rests her head on my shoulder. Her hands are still
resting on the keys, eager to play again."
A "You shouldn't have abandoned music."

F "..."

"We talked about what we would do now, especially since it was getting dark outside
and the street lights were coming on."

"We walked our way back to where we started, near the park."

F "I don't know, Anon! It's just so WEIRD! A music teacher?"

A "I don't know, Fang, it could be cool if you tried."

"Fang is shivering, the colder air setting in."

A "Here, this'll get you warmer."

“I draw Lucy close to my chest.”

"She snuggles up to me."

F "Thank you."

"She's precious. Being taller now, I guess the animal --monkey part of my brain is
telling me to protect my smaller and more fragile mate."

A "Little by little, I'll get you back to music, your friends, I'm sure it'll work
out fine towards the end."

"Lucy stirs. She doesn’t like the idea."

F "Anon...please don't ask me to do that. I'm not ready."

A "How are you not ready?"

F "I lied, Anon. Ok?"

F "I lied, I disappointed you, I promised I would get better, but you're clearly
not happy with how I turned out."
A "Nonsense, you have no idea how proud I am of you."

F "I'm still broken, Anon."

F "I’ve even started preening again because I had no one, but remembering I
promised you and Naser I wouldn't do it anymore hurt even more so."

F "But that was years ago. I swear, I tried getting better."

F "Forgive me."

"I'm the one sighing this time."

A "..."

F "You wanted me to live my own life, be this great person you wanted me to be, yet
I'm here doing menial church tasks and dealing with children.”

F “I got no friends, no new songs, nothing going on for me.”

F “I know I needed to be a famous musician to make you happy, I know I needed to


have forgiven Trish and the others, but it just didn't work out. I couldn't do it."

F "I'm lonely, Anon. You're all that's left for me."

A "You didn't need to be all that to be happy, I still think you're the best."

A "Forget it, Lucy. What's done is done. We're here.

A "That's all it matters."

"I embrace her, I could tell she was getting tense, but slowly she relaxes in my
arms.”

“When I said that we're being together was all that mattered, she hugged me back."

A "I'm here."

F "And I still can't believe it."

“Lucy is shaking with excitement in my arms now.”


F "I already am thinking up all kinds of things we could do!"

F "Fuck, just knowing I won't see you until tomorrow already hurts me."

F "I can take you to see Mom and Dad! Right now! They would get a kick out of
seeing you like this."

A "Ah! Not right now. That would be too much for them to take in.”

A “And I have to unpack too, I got a little room in a motel for now."

F “Would you like some help?”

“I thought to deny her, but Lucy’s eyes are pleading with me to say yes.”

A “I’ve got quite a bit, you sure Lucy?”

F “All the more reason for me to help!”

A “...Alright then. My motel isn’t too far from here.”

“I wasn’t kidding when I said I had a lot to unpack.”

“Between all the luggage I had brought back with me.”

“And the heavier memories of my time spent in the arid deserts.”

“I saw and felt a different side of Lucy I’d partially forgotten.”

“Her tender hands rubbing soothingly across the scars now littered across my
chest.”

“We stayed up til the warm morning glow of dawn lit up the messy motel room.”

“Clothes, paperwork and useless knick knacks I’d collected were scattered
everywhere in an organized chaos.”

“And yet I’ve never felt more rest and at peace with the world than with Lucy
cuddled up next to me.”
“A peace shattered by my stomach demanding sustenance loudly.”

A “Mmm… How about we get some breakfast? My treat.”

F “A breakfast date sounds nice.”

F “Say, how about we invite my family. I’m sure mom would love to see you again.”

“Probably would, too. However…”

A “I’d rather spend it with just you, Lucy.”

“I grin as I watch Lucy’s face turn beet red.”

F “You were never this smooth a talker, Anon…”

F “Fine. But I definitely want them to see you.”

A “Tomorrow then?”

F “Tomorrow.”

F "I'll tell them first! Get them hyped to see you!"

A "That would be great. So...tomorrow then?"

F "Tomorrow, yes."

"We made our way towards her car door, but before getting in, she once again
embraces me, This time a little stronger."

A "Urgh-- it's ok, Lucy."

F "I was so lonely, Anon."

A "You don't need to be alone, you know."

F "I'm so glad you're here. I missed you."


A "I missed you too, Lucy."

"Though I miss the old Fang, I'm elated. I love you, Lucy."

“ENDING THREE OF FOUR”

“-Volcano Highschool Musical-”


15D. Fast Times at Volcano High

“-Two Weeks Later-”

“Time seemed to fly after prom, honestly.”

“Probably the stress of finals.”

“And graduation rehearsals.”

“And graduation itself.”

“I nearly gouged out my eardrums having to sit through Naomi’s speech.”

“Of course the bubblegum blockhead was the valedictorian.”

“Her speech, as rehearsed as it was, still sounded like we were at a funeral.”

“Even now I think she’s still seething --sneeding from prom night.”

“Or maybe it’s the photo of her face that’s currently circulating a certain
Albanian Car Trading chatroom.”

“Infinitely better than any reaction I could’ve made.”

“About a week after, Fang came to me with news that Trish got the idea for a
celebration and Naser was organizing it.”

“Naser organizing any party meant that he’d make sure nobody had any real fun, so
Fang convinced him to split up the work between the rest of us.”

“It was Fang’s job to get the pizza.”

“I, the broke fuck that I am, was put in charge of the fire and finding a good pit
for it.”

{i}Nas “You people are good at making fires, right Anon?”{/i}

“I wonder if I can sue him for hate speech.”

“That aside.”

“The party is at St. Hammond Beach, which is just below the cliffs that make the
town’s namesake.”

“The sun has already set when we get there, the starry sky illuminating the whole
place in a pale blue.”

“I got to the site a bit earlier and got to set up an impressive firepit with
meticulously set stones surrounding it, and logs set in an ideal tower for an
overnight blaze.”

“Everything is ready, so where is everyone else?”

“We agreed to meet at seven, right?”

“Right as I reach into my pocket for my phone, a van chugs onto the sand from the
distance.”

“It stops right in front of me and Trish flies out the side door, gasping for
breath.”

T “ *huff*, *huff*...”

A “You look like you just got choked out by Spears.”

“She just points back to the van.”

“The drivers’ door opens, letting out a gust of smoke from within.”

“Reed emerges from the cloud as if nothing’s wrong.”

T “Reed... *huff*... Your car.... *huff*...”

Re “Oh yeah, you like it? It’s an electric!”


“Trish collapses in the sand.”

“Before I can check if she’s still breathing, a stereotypical mariachi car horn
catches my attention.”

“I swing around and catch Stella and Rosa exiting a hot pink Prius --with an
extremely dented hood, each with a pair of phone speakers in their hands.”

“Waving to them, my focus returns to Reed now helping Trish off the ground.”

Re “Need a light, amigo?”

“Before I can respond, he reaches into his pocket and fishes out a lighter which is
promptly tossed my way.”

“Catching it out of the air, I only briefly catch the words ‘FUCK COMMUNISM’
engraved in its side when I hear yet another car approaching.”

“Recognizing it by sound alone, I see the NasCar glide to a halt next to Rosa’s
car.”

“That name might still be dumb as hell, but I gotta admit it’s growing on me.”

“Fang emerges from the backseat and waves at me.”

“She hunches into the car to get out the pizza boxes and starts striding towards
us.”

Nas “...c’mon babe, please. You know she didn’t do it on purpose!”

“Naomi erupts from the car in a frothing rage, her shirt noticeably stained an
orange-red.”

F “Ha! Wish I did.”

F “Oh yeah, the box on top is a bit messed up. Long story.”

N “How on *EARTH* did you throw a pizza on me from the backseat and get it back in
the box?!”

Re “Naser, bro... you were driving the whole time, right?”

Nas “Yeah, why?”

Re “Just a feeling.”

N “This stuff has been happening ever since that picture of me was posted online.”
Nas “Relax, babe, it’s the start of summer.”

Nas “Here, take my jacket.”

“Naser starts sliding the jacket off his back and…”

“What the-...?”

“What is this noneuclidean bullshit I see before me.”

“Why is there a second jacket below the first…?”

“Reed taps my back and pulls my eyes away from the spatial anomaly.”

Re “Hurry up and start the fire, man…”

Re “I got the booze all ready.”

“Once the bonfire was set ablaze Stella and Trish started setting up the speakers
around in a radius.”

Ro “Are you sure these will be loud enough?”

Ro “They’re only a few dollars at the supermarket.”

Re “Oh yeah, those’ll be louder than the carfe this time.”

Ro “Why would coffee be louder than a stereo?”

Re “Anyway!”

“Reed drops the ice chest he was holding in the sand.”

Re “Went all in man, got the name brands and everything.”

A “I’m surprised you got Naser to let you bring this stuff.”

“Naser returns to the rest of the group, wearing his jacket again.”
Nas “Got me to agree to what?”

Re “About that...”

Nas “You brought alcohol?!”

Re “I mean, I usually call it liquor, but…”

Nas “Darn it, Reed!”

Nas “We’re all underage, you know even if I were to agree Naomi would pitch a fit!”

Re “Dude, we all just graduated…”

Re “If now isn’t the time to live a little, then when?”

“Naser hesitates.”

Re “Besides, I did think of you and Naomi.”

Nas “Huh?”

Re “Yeah, I got a special brand just for the two of you. Great beginner stuff.”

Nas “You… Whatever, I’ll try to keep Naomi from calling the police, fine.”

Re “You’re a real bro, man…”

Re “If everyone’s ready then let’s get started!”

“Soon enough the pizza and booze are passed out and we’re all sitting in the sand
around the blazing fire and the weekly top-forty list playing on the speakers.”

“Everyone is conversating amongst themselves.”

T “-are totally in! Come on, you’d look great in it!”

F “No fucking way that’s fucking real! ‘Beach maid’?! Have you been sneaking Reed’s
stash again?”
N “And-and-and another thing!”

N “Her song wasn’t even that good! *hic*”

N “Why was it us who gets *hic*, gets the short end of the stick?!”

Nas “I mean, I mean, I liked it…”

N “You’ve said that a dozen times already…”

Re “Y’know, I’m something of a gardener myself.”

Ro “Oh! Really? You should have joined the gardening club back at school, we had
the loveliest little popp[b]y bed.”

Re “Poppies, you say? The coincidences keep piling up, don’t they…”

St “-And the robots are powered by their blood! Super cool right?!”

“Oh right, Stella was talking to me. Forgot why I was zoning out for a bit.”

A “Sure, yeah.”

St “Great, I’ll get my copy and we can watch it at your place sometime.”

St “Oh! Bring Fang too! She’d love this movie too!”

“Did I just agree to something?”

St “Oh, oh! Enough about Escaflowne, I want to show you something neat!”

“She brings a small box from her front pocket.”

St “I got a new set of tarot cards! You want to be the first to use them?”

A “I don’t see why not.”

“Stella shifts to a criss-cross position and fans out all the cards for me to pick
from.”
“I pull one out and turn it over.”

A “The lovers…?”

“The illustration depicts a human and pterosaur in embrace.”

“I raise an eyebrow at Stella.”

St “What’s that look for?”

A “Oh come on.”

St “Oh, you know, the heart of the cards and all that.”

St “Go ahead and keep that one.”

“I sigh and tuck the card into my jacket pocket.”

A “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”

“Stella’s not-so-innocent smile tells me all I need to know.”

Ro “I think it’s so cute!”

“Rosa and Reed apparently finished their botanical conversation and were listening
in on Stella’s entire ‘fortune’.”

Re “Ooh! Do me next, man.”

St “Maybe later, Reed.”

“Reed deflates a bit and my attention returns to the inebriated couple behind him.”

A “What did you even give Naser to get them that wasted?”

“Reed glances behind him before throwing his head back in laughter.”

Re “Little party trick, bro…”

“He grabs one of Naser’s empty cans and tosses it in my lap.”

“Holding it up to the light, I barely make out the words ‘NON ALCOHOLIC’ written in
microscopic font.”

A “So you mean they’re-”

Re “Totally sober, dude.”


“It’s my turn to laugh at the pair making fools of themselves when Fang suddenly
gets up and starts walking towards the parked cars.”

F “Got something I want to do, be right back.”

“I give her a smile and turn back to Reed.”

Re “We can still mess with them, man. Watch this.”

Re “Hey Naser! What’s your plan now that you’re, like, out of school?

“The two virgin drunks turn their attention to us, Naser clearly ‘deep’ in
thought.”

Nas “Aw, man, like… I’m gonna be- gonna go and be a nur- nyros- sturgon.”

N “My bad boy’s soooooooooo smart!”

“Gross.”

“I lean towards Reed and lower my voice.”

A “Should we tell them?”

Re “Nah, dude. Naomi’s having fun for like, the first time ever.”

A “...So tomorrow then?”

Re “Definitely tomorrow, bro.”

“Reed lets out a sigh and turns back towards me.”

Re “So, like, for real though... what are you gonna do now that school’s over,
man?”

>>Go to college
>>Not certain just yet

>>Go to college
A “Well… Spears convinced me to send out a couple application letters for college.”

A “I’m thinking of doing something with music… maybe becoming a sound engineer?”

>>Not certain just yet


A “I’m not sure yet.”

A “I’m thinking of doing something with music… maybe becoming a sound engineer?”

>>
Re “Oh nice, dude! You can be the band’s sound technician when you’re done!”

A “Yeah, something like that… What about you?”

Re “Me? Flow with the go, dude. Like the dinos of old, gotta get in sync with the
universe first, y’know?”

A “Riiiight. What about-”

T “I’m gonna get my cosmetologist license and open my own horn salon!”

“The miniature triceratops bursts out from the other side of the bonfire, catching
me off guard.”

T “We’ll do hair and horns and piercings and- oh! Engravings too! Fang even said-”

F “That I’d be your first customer, I’ve told you a million times by now”

“Fang returns from wherever it is she went, now carrying an object in her hands.”

“The flickering light of the bonfire is enough to illuminate the cover of the
school yearbook she’s holding.”

“Without a word she walks in front of us, conspicuously carrying the yearbook right
towards-”

A “You’re not going to burn your yearbook, are you? That thing was like, eighty
bucks!”

F “What? No! How drunk are you, you dork?”

A “This many.”

“I hold up three fingers, though why is it suddenly nine?”

“Hmmmm… Gonna need some more beer to fix that.”

F “God, Anon, I was thinking we could all… I dunno… sign it? I saw a lot of others
doing that.”

A “Oh…”

“I always thought it was a silly tradition.”

“I think back to all the yearbooks I have back home.”

“And how they’re all blank inside the cover.”


“Totally just a silly tradition.”

F “Why else would I even have one of these things?”

A “Your mom-”

F “Aside from my mom.”

T “Me first me first!”

“Trish is already fumbling through her hoodie pocket for some writing implement.”

Ro “Yes! I would love to, Fang!”

St “Oh I know exactly what to write! First let me do a palm reading!”

Re “Heh… I’ll sign it too.”

N “WOOOOOOOOOO!”

“The yearbook makes its way around the fire, each of us leaving some meaningful
message on it’s inside covers.”

“I’m the last to receive the book and I look at what each of our friends wrote.”

“{i}You’ll always be my best friend, no matter what happens, Lucy. - Trish{/i}”

“Lucy? Heh, nah, Fang will always be Fang to me.”

“{i}Stay frosty. - Reed{/i}”

“Wow, he even drew King Rex, complete with ‘fire breathing’.”

“{i}Even the most wilted flower flourishes under God’s light. -Rosa{/i}”

“I think reading that one counts for my next few church visits. Amen, Raptor
Jesus.”

“{i}The future is something that you build by yourself. - Stella{/i}”


“So close to kneecapping her with this book. Fuckin’ Sailor Moon.”

“I can’t decipher either Naser or Naomi’s. Naser’s looks like a bunch of chicken
scratched scribbles, while Naomi’s looks like her chickens went to college and got
a doctorate.”

F “Anon? Hellooooo. You’ve been staring at the page for the past five minutes.”

A “Right right. Just uh… thinking of what to put.”

“Okay, Anon, something meaningful. Something that’ll remind Fang of you every time
she reads it.”

--not brazil, PLAYER INPUT MESSAGE

“Perfect.”

“I hand the yearbook to Fang.”

“She skims the page and then shakes her head.”

F “Really Anon? You’re such a dweeb.”

A “It was very fitting if you ask me.”

“As the night draws on and the temperature falls we move closer to the fire.”

“My fingers find themselves interlocked with Fang’s, and her wing drapes over my
shoulder as a natural blanket.”

“I can’t help but smile as we slowly drift off to sleep around the campfire.”

“I can regret the hangover tomorrow, right now I want to just enjoy the night with
my friends.”

“...”

“-Six months later-”

“After prom night and graduation life slowed down.”


“I’ve been accepted to a college a few states away for a degree in sound
engineering.”

“No worries about school except for the lunch card I still had to pay back.”

“Moe had been kind enough to give me a summer job to help with that.”

“Though I don’t think I can talk about some of the things I’ve seen.”

“I’ll never be able to look at marinara the same way.”

“But pasta-based trauma aside, it’s now the day after Christmas.”

“I’m sitting in my bed, looking through one of my favorite presents.”

“Fang’s mom was right, I am happy about all those photos.”

“As I look through the scrapbook spread across my lap I can’t help but reminisce
about the best year of my life.”

F “*SSSSNRRRRRRK*”

“I have to contain my laugh, but Fang looks ridiculously cute curled up beside me
in my bed.”

“Curled up around my pillow, suckling on her thumb.”

“I go back to the scrapbook, enjoying the memories I’ve shared with my friends.”

“And to think I wanted to stay a loner when I first got here.”

“*Beep boop beep*”

“*VRRRRRRRRRMMMM*”

F “‘M UP!”

“The loud noise of Trish’s present makes Fang bolt upright.”

A “OOF!”
“And sends me tumbling onto Reed’s present.”

“The new Metal Gear RAYmba Mk.II bumps against my face, turns, and continues eating
the crumbs off my new carpet.”

“Even from the floor I can say that both were really thoughtful gifts.”

“Reed was right, the carpet really helped to tie the room together.”

F “...Anon? You here?”

A “On the floor.”

“Fang’s face appears over the edge of my bed.”

F “Why are you on the floor?”

A “...Yoga?”

F “Riiiiight.”

“I sit up from the floor and shiver.”

“Volcadera Bluffs may not get snow, but the cold air and the ocean definitely make
the town cold as shit.”

“I crawl back on to my bed and try to find my spot that I warmed.”

A “Fang you stole my warm spot!”

“In fact she’s taken up the entire bed. Her wings are spread wide and all of my
blanket has been piled over her.”

F “Mine!”

A “Come on, you gonna let your boyfriend freeze?”

F “Yes.”

A “That’s just cold of you.”


“She groans at my pun but acquiesces, holding open the blanket and shuffling over.”

F “Hurry up! You’re letting the warm escape.”

“I slide into the blanket next to her, my arms automatically wrapping around Fang’s
waist and drawing her against my chest.”

F “Mmmm.”

“Her beak rubs against me as she hums.”

“Aw yes. Cuddles. Best way to spend a cold day.”

F “Damn right.”

“I chuckle and reach for the scrapbook.”

F “You’re looking at that again?”

A “...Yeah?”

“Her face glows a soft pink in embarrassment.”

A “D’aaaaawww… Someone’s embarrassed.”

F “And someone is about to be on the floor again.”

“*VRRRRRM* *Beep boop beep*”

F “I think Mark Two would like the company.”

A “Sheesh, you’re always so grouchy in the morning.”

“I laugh even as her elbow digs into my chest.”

“Fang crawls on top of me and puts all her weight down on my lungs.”

“I only laugh more.”

“Not like Fang can do what a staircase could.”


F “Stop. Cuddles now. Scrapbook later.”

A “Hahahahalright. Cuddles it is.”

“She squeals when I roll us on to our side, bringing us face to face.”

“I can feel my own face glow as warm as hers, but I also have the same smile as her
too.”

“I place a chaste kiss on the end of her snoot, eliciting some giggles from Fang.”

F “What did I say about that.”

A “Bout what?”

F “Kissing that!”

A “Mmmm gonna need to be more specific.”

F “Kissing my nose!”

A “Oh! You mean this!”

“I kiss her snoot again.”

F “Ugh, stop messing with the snoot.”

“I chuckle again.”

F “Fuck!”

A “I made you say it.”

“I love playing the Snoot game.”

F “Fucking insufferable.”

“I kiss the snoot one final time and get another elbow as my reward.”

F “In.suf.fer.a.ble.”
“I snatch the scrapbook at last.”

“Fang groans and hides her face in my chest.”

F “Why do you like that thing so much?”

A “Because your mom was right.”

“Fang groans again.”

A “Come on, there’s some embarrassing pics of me in here too.”

F “Like you making out with an anime girl again?”

A “Okay not that embarrassing.”

“I turn onto my back and Fang adjusts herself to lean on my shoulder.”

“The rest of our morning is spent cuddled in my bed, going through the scrapbook
together.”

“When lunchtime rolls around, I have to face reality and make something to eat.”

“Especially since no restaurant in the city will deliver to this neighborhood.”

A “Alas, I must leave the warmth of the bed to make lunch.”

A “...This is gonna suck.”

F “Wear the thing.”

A “I’d rather just carry the blanket around.”

F “Mine.”

A “Pfeh.”

“I reach under the bed to retrieve the bag I tried hiding, and I pull out the
jacket from within.”
“Two expertly stitched gorilla heads stare back at me, with the text ‘MNKY 4 LYF’
embroidered in gold thread.”

“I still don’t know if Naser is racist or if he really is just that clueless.”

A “This is great.”

F “It looks freaking fantastic, I don’t know why you don’t want to wear it.”

A “And you don’t see anything wrong with this?”

F “Nope.”

A “...You realize last month was Homo History Month, right?”

F “What’s that have to do with an ugly jacket?”

“I’ll sue them later.”

A “Alright, here I go.”

“I zip the abomination on and step out of bed, the wall of cold stinging my toes.”

A “Carbonara sound good?”

F “Why do you make it so weird? Most people just use tomato sauce.”

A “...Don’t ask questions you aren’t prepared to know the answer to.”

“I crack four eggs, separating the yolk from the whites and saving them in a
tupperware for later.”

“Maybe a simple custard pudding for dessert later.”

“I grab some bacon, cheese and milk from the fridge, grating a healthy handful of
cheese into the yolks and mixing with a splash of milk before dicing the bacon.”

“Boiling some water in the kettle to save time, I measure out the appropriate
amount of spaghetti and toss it in the pot with the water and some salt before
grabbing a pan and setting it on the stove.”
F “Stop acting like you’re on the cooking channel, Anon.”

“I start frying the bacon to render out the fat before adding in some pre-chopped
garlic, sauteing until it’s fragrant.”

“When the bacon turns crispy, just in time for the spaghetti to finish cooking, I
remove the pan from the heat while throwing in some of the pasta water to bring
down the temperature.”

“The final step was to add the yolks, cheese and milk to the bacon and garlic with
some more pasta water and toss it with the spaghetti until it all came together as
a creamy, salty and delicious lunch.”

“All in less than ten minutes.”

A “It’s all ready.”

A “Alright, RAYmba, nap time.”

A “Move to the rug so we can eat.”

“Fang grumbles and starts shifting in the bed, so I turn my attention to making the
plates.”

“I grab a few sodas from the fridge and place everything on the new rug for an
indoor picnic setup.”

“Fang’s moved from being wrapped up on the bed to being wrapped up on the rug,
laying on her stomach.”

“Her feet wagging back and forth in a pair of plush green dino slippers.”

A “Better hurry, in this weather this’ll get cold in minutes.”

A “Then again, the computer’s right there, I could always try running the snootcoin
miner.”

F “That sounds like it’ll only work once.”

A “True.”

“We both start eating the pasta.”


“While I take the classic approach of just slurping the noodles, Fang has a harder
time and resorts to just twisting the fork around and eating a whole clump at
once.”

A “You plan on enjoying any?”

F “It’sh good. Like the uh, cheese.”

A “Why thank you.”

“Eventually lunch is reduced to greasy plates and crushed soda cans.”

“Fang moves her trash aside and rests in her arms.”

A “Oh, I just remembered.”

A “I have something else for you.”

F “Another christmas present?”

A “You’ll see.”

“I take my phone from my pocket and lay it face-up on the carpet.”

F “Your phone?”

A “Hold on.”

“From under my bed, RAYmba Mk1 hums to life and instinctively makes a beeline for
the phone.”

“It struggles a bit due to the small package strapped around it like it’s a pack
mule.”

“Fang has to raise her arm after it bumps into her to let it pass.”

“It reaches my phone and starts happily scraping the dust from it.”

F “Impressive.”
F “You get Reed to make it do that for you?”

A “Maybe, however...”

A “That’s not what I wanted to show you.”

“I remove the small package from the robot and hand it to Fang.”

A “Go ahead.”

“She examines the box carefully before removing the paper packaging.”

“Sliding the box open reveals an amber pendant on a silver chain.”

“Fang takes the necklace from its box and holds it up for us both to inspect.”

“As the amber dangles in the air, it catches the light from outside and glows the
same brilliant orange as her eyes.”

F “Anon… it’s beautiful.”

A “Here.”

“I take the pendant from her hands and hold it open to put around Fang’s neck.”

“She holds her hair up for my hands to reach across.”

“I try to fumble with the clasp, it’s a bit tricky with the wings getting in the
way…”

“The tip of her beak is mere centimeters from my face.”

F “...”

A “...”

A “...There.”

“Fang lets her hair down again and holds up the pendant.”
F “This is… thank you, Anon.”

A “The moment I saw it, I knew it would have been the perfect present.”

F “Speaking of presents…”

“She gestures her snout to the ukulele resting against the corner of the room.”

F “You gonna try playing that thing or what?”

A “I could, yeah.”

F “Do uh... do that song I taught you.”

“I happily oblige and rip off the bow still wrapped around the small instrument.”

A “I’m not singing for you, you know that, right?”

“Fang giggles as I begin plucking away at the tiny little strings, producing a very
familiar melody.”

“She starts thumbing her new pendant absentmindedly.”

“My shrill rendition more resembled that first time Fang played it on the rooftop
than her energetic performance at prom.”

“Despite my occasional fumbling, it still possesses that same nostalgic tone it


always had.”

“When Fang begins humming along, I soon find myself joining in to make the song
sound complete.”

“I wish moments like these could last forever.”

“But just like the music in the air, they always do and before long we reach the
end of the song.”

“A comfortable silence fills the room after the notes fade.”

F “...I love that song.”

A “I hope so, you wrote it after all.”

F “Yeah, but you know we-”

“Her thought is interrupted by a knock at the door.”

F “You expecting company?”


“I give her a puzzled look in return before getting up and heading to the door.”

“My momentary fear of it being a potential addict or murderer are quelled upon
opening the door, revealing-”

A “Principal Spears? What are you doing here?”

“Our ex-principal is squeezed into the narrow hallway, holding a delicately wrapped
gift in his hands.”

Sp “Anon, I trust that you had a good Christmas?”

Sp “Normally I wouldn’t visit a former student like this, but I intend on keeping
to my offer during the school year.”

“He extends the gift towards me and I cautiously accept, beginning to open the
wrapping paper.”

“Inside is a box set of some anime I’ve never heard of before.”

A “...’Rurouni Kenshin’?”

Sp “As I said, I am always open to giving some quality anime suggestions.”

Sp “I think you’ll find this quite enjoyable.”

A “I, uh… thank you, Principal Spears.”

“Spears gives a fatherly smile as I shake his hand.”

Sp “I hope you and Fang enjoy the rest of your holidays.”

A “Thanks, yeah. I’ve had fun exchanging gifts with my friends.”

Sp “I can see you’re wearing a new jacket now-”

“He stares with a certain thinly veiled disgust creeping on his face.”

Sp “Anon, I get that we live in a post-racial world and all…”

Sp “But come on, have a little pride in yourself.”

“Fang struggles to keep her laughter in behind me.”

A “No it’s cool, Mister Spears.”

A “I’m taking it back.”


Sp “If you say so.”

Sp “At any rate, I shouldn’t keep you too long.”

A “You sure? I have some leftover lunch if you want to stick around a bit.”

Sp “I really appreciate the offer, but I have my own plans for lunch with my
family.”

A “Alright. Thanks again for stopping by.”

Sp “Had to do it at least once before you leave next month.”

Sp “Be seeing you. Fang.”

-- “As Spears jumps from my porch to a nearby roof, he leaves something where he
once stood.”

-- “This time a copy of Nichijou.”

“Fang throws a handwave back at him.”

“Spears clambers out the door and shuts it behind him, leaving just Fang and I in
the room again.”

F “... That’s right, you’re leaving next month…”

“Fang curls up in the blanket.”

A “...Yeah…”

“I sit next to her on the ground and wrap an arm around her shoulder.”

F “Do you really have to go?”

F “Can’t you just go to community college here in the city?”

A “You’ve seen the acceptance letter, Fang.”

A “I got a scholarship to stay there at a fraction of the cost. I can’t just pass
that up.”

F “But five years?”

A “You got plans of your own, don’t you?”

F “Yeah. So…”

A “So…”

F “We’re still gonna talk.”

A “Obviously.”

F “But…”

“Fang takes a deep breath.”

F “I’m not doing a distant relationship.”

“Oh…”

“Oh wow…”

A “Is this a break up?”

“Because ow, my fucking heart.”

“Fang shakes her head from side to side slowly.”

“Oh thank fuck.”

F “I don’t want to break up, Anon.”

F “But I was thinking…”

F “You’ve been helping me ever since you got here.”

A “Yeah, and you’ve helped me too.”


F “I know.”

F “But you’re leaving for college.”

F “So…”

F “I… Want to do some thinking.”

A “More thinking? Wow, that’s new for you.”

“The plastic plate bounces off my head harmlessly.”

F “...Ass…”

“Fang giggles as I fake like I’m on a soccer pitch.”

F “I want to do more thinking. Self-reflecting.”

F “This entire year has been one of the best in my life.”

F “And I want more of them like this.”

F “But with you gone I gotta make them good on my own, ya know?”

A “I get you.”

“I pull Fang closer, my chin resting atop her head.”

A “So, not breaking up.”

F “No, just…”

A “A break?”

“She giggles again.”

F “Yeah. A break sounds right. Not breaking up, just taking a break.”

A “Plus, I’m not leaving for a few weeks.”


“Fang perks up.”

F “True. That’s a few weeks to cram in all the cuddles I’ll be missing.”

A “Cuddles or {i}cuddles{/i}?”

“Fang’s grin is just shy of mischievous.”

F “On the bed. Now. I’m collecting on those {i}cuddles{/i} right now.”

A “Yes ma’am.”

“...”

“-Five Years Later-”

“July seventeenth.”

“Year 201M2025 BC.”

“Volcaldera Bluffs.”

“Weather conditions; hot as tits.”

“The evening sun is boiling hot and I’m reminded of one of the myriad of reasons
why I first loathed living here.”

“The sweat dripping in my eyes makes it difficult to see anything five feet in
front of me.”

“Like a tree planted in the sidewalk that I swerve to avoid.”

“The air is hot and humid, and I can feel my body grow heavier as I get closer.”

“I can’t determine if it’s from the sweat soaking my clothes or the welling
trepidation inside me.”

“It’s been five years since I’ve seen anyone here.”

“I’ve kept in touch with all of them.”


“But to see them again in person?”

“It’s the sounds that reach me first. The chatter of people milling about.”

???(Sage) “Bro”

???(Rosa) “It’s been too long!”

???(Stella) “It was only five years *Giggle*”

“I can make out the building now. I use the sleeve of my shirt to wipe the sweat
from my eyes and brow.”

“I look at the name written on the arch over the entrance.”

“Volcano High.”

A “Still the perfect setting for a horror game. Or maybe a shitty WAD.”

“The attempt at humouring myself just made me feel more anxious.”

“A check of my phone says I’m thirty minutes early. Wonderful.”

“I move to the entrance, only to see all of the steps occupied by twenty-somethings
waiting.”

A “Yo, this the line?”

Re “Anon?”

“A hobo raptor at the top of the steps pulls his oversized shades down to peer at
me.”

Re “Ayyy Anon, what’s up dude?”

“I immediately recognize his voice.”

A “Hey Reed, what’s happening?”


A “You seem to certainly have uh… changed.”

A “Why do you look like uh… I don’t want to sound rude or anything, but…”

A “You look homeless, Reed.”

Re “Whaaaat?”

Re “Duuude, I’m not homeless! I’m the richest raptor in the world, guy!”

-- Re “I”m so rich I use Bens as toilet paper and Warren Buffet asks me for pocket
money.”

-- Re “I’m so rich, I own Sneed’s Feed and Seed. What a wild ride that was.”

“I think Reed’s lost it.”

Re “What’d you say, man?”

A “What? Nothing. No idea what you’re talking about.”

A “So, how did you get to become the “richest raptor in the world”?”

-- Re “I sold it.”

-- A “‘It’?”

-- Re “Yeah. I sold it. I’m the raptor who sold the world.”

Re “You wouldn’t believe it, man!”

Re “See, it all started with…”

“Reed proceeds to run his mouth off about a bunch of gibberish.”

“I cannot understand anything he's saying.”

“I think I heard ‘pharmaceutical business’ at one point?”

Re “...and then I was brought here by the birds, dude.”


Re “So what’ve you been up to, man?”

Re “You look like you haven’t changed a day.”

A “It’s not as exciting as your story, honestly.”

A “I just went off to college, got my bachelor’s, and now I’m just a sound
engineer.”

Re “Sounds pretty sweet --epic, dude.”

“We stand there for a moment in the blazing heat.”

Re “Dude, it’s fuckin’ hot out here, you wanna get inside?”

Re “They got drinks n’ shit!”

A “Definitely, I need some air conditioning.”

“We quickly moved along to the gymnasium.”

A “Man, it really hasn’t changed. Takes me back.”

Re “Yeah, takes me back too, man.”

Re “Hold on, have you signed in yet?”

A “No, didn’t know I had to.”

“Reed gestures to the sign-in table.”

“The clerk is crouched behind the table sorting through a box.”

“I go over to write in my John Hancock and the person behind the counter stands
up.”

“My nose is assaulted by the pheromones of perfumes that probably cost more than a
years’ salary.”
N “Oh!”

N “Anon, you made it!”

A “Yeah, I did.”

A “Life been treating you well?”

N “Oh yes, just last year I moved in with my dear Kanyesaurus.”

“What the fuck is this world anymore?”

A “Real shame about his last presidential run.”

N “Oh, he got over it.”

N “There’s always 2028!”

N “Presidential yeezys shall rise again, he says.”

“WHAT THE FUUUUCK”

A “That reminds me, have you seen Naser’s college posts?”

A “He got top marks on his last exam.”

N “No, I lost touch with him about three years ago.”

-- A “And how long have you been dating Kanyesaurus?”

-- N “Four years, why?”

-- “It explains so much.”

A “Oh, sorry. How about work, then?”

N “I haven’t been working, mostly staying back at home and looking after our
newborns.”

N “Oh my goodness, You’ll have to see the pictures I’ve been taking sometimes,
they’re the most precious, adorable things!”

A “Yeah?”

N "They're super clever, too! I've already started looking at private schools for
them!"

A "Wait how old are they again?"

N "16 weeks, 4 days and 22 hours, why?"

“Those poor bastards. I hope Kanyesaurus at least has some say in their lives.”

A “Sounds like they take after their mother, congratulations.”

“I turn around to see a short line forming behind me.”

A “Sorry to keep you so long, I’ll get out of here.”

N “Thanks for catching up, Anon. When I’m done here we can chat more.”

-- “You too, you living plastic abomination.”

“I go rejoin Reed and we enter the gymnasium together.”

“The setup is rather similar to that prom night all those years ago, albeit without
the foreign decor.”

“Young men and women mingle with small drinks and party foods across the floor.”

Re “Man, those look good. Come over here, I’ll get you a drink, on me.”

“I follow him over to the minibar. Trish is sitting in one of the seats, huddled
over an empty glass.”

“Rosa is pouring drinks for the few other drunkards when she spots us approach.”

Ro “Oh! An-on, it is great to see you after all this time!”

Ro “Please, sit and talk awhile!”


“Trish looks up from her sulking and her face lights up at the sight of us.”

T “Anon! It’s been years!”

A “Trish, Rosa, glad we found you here!”

Re “Come on man, we’ve been texting this whole time.”

“Reed flashes two fingers at Rosa, who was already setting out a few glasses.”

A “Yeah, good to see you two.”

A “Why’re you looking so gloomy over here?”

Ro “She has been telling me about how it is the end of her world.”

T “It’s nothing that serious, just workplace drama.”

Re “What, your employees raise another beef with the concept of horn piercings
again?”

Ro “No, this time it’s with the engraving tools.”

T “They’re telling me people would rather go to the dentist with all the drills we
use.”

T “And mostly with my designs for hollowed-out horns.”

“Rosa instinctively rubs her own horn.”

A “H-hollow?”

T “Of course, I even got in contact with a sculptor and figured out how to make
them whistle in the wind!”

“Reed leans in to whisper in my ear.”

Re “One of the designs sounds like Road Warrior.”

“I shudder at the image.”


T “Don’t knock it, my satisfaction rate is a clean one-hundred percent!”

-- Re “Having only one customer doesn’t count.”

Ro “The only problem is getting people to be willing to try it.”

A “Sounds like there’s a lot of risk there, yeah.”

T “It’s not even that bloody, I only hire the best.”

A “B-bloody?”

T “What, never had a piercing before? Same thing.”

“Reed shakes his head.”

Ro “Anything more than a regular piercing is an abomination before our Lord.”

“I finish my drink and Reed downs his in one shot, tossing a few dollars on the
counter.”

“I look up to see the one person I’m most anxious and excited to talk with again
approaching.”

A “Fang! You’re here!”

F “Wha- I- dammit Anon, I told you to stop calling me that!”

Re “Isn’t that the name Lucy used back in senior year?”

T “Yeah, I think it was.”

A “Come on, you’ll always be Fang to me.”

“Lucy covers her eyes with her hands.”

F “You haven’t changed a bit, I swear.”

Re “C’mon, get over here. I’ll order us all another watchamacallit of drinks. It’s
on me, the richest raptor in the woooorld!”
“Reed cheerfully throws his arms up as he shouts out a prolonged ‘world’”

F “Sure, thanks. I can’t have too much though, I’m the event organizer and all.”

A “Sounds like a tough break.”

A “Wait, I thought you were the music teacher here.”

F “I’m getting there. Still working with Mister Jingo until he retires next year.”

F “Until then I’m a teachers’ assistant.”

A “Oh, alright, I see.”

“I take a quick glimpse around the room and fail to see any large ape-man.”

A “I feel like we’re missing someone.”

A “Where’s Spears? I could have sworn he would be here.”

Re “Nah man, he’s gone. I saw him on TV the other day, though.”

A “Was he giving a speech or something?”

Re “Sort of, he does commercials for car dealerships now.”

Re “He’s built a reputation for his gimmick of wrecking a car in every ad he does.”

A “I… I see.”

“Oh god I thought that was a joke about slamming people into cars.”

“The hours reconnecting with my old friends pass surprisingly quickly, and the time
eventually comes for everyone to go home.”

“Lucy excuses herself from the group to go give the closing speech.”

“She goes up onstage and tests the microphone, getting everyone’s attention.”
F “Alright everyone, it’s been a wonderful night.”

F “You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here.”

F “Please start finding your designated drivers or calling up the --one taxi driver
--left.”

F “We will be locking the doors at three.”

-- F “And you better not steal my bike again, Hitler.”

“She puts the mic back on its stand and jumps offstage.”

“Reed pats my shoulder.”

Re “You got a ride home man?”

A “I can walk, but thanks.”

“Lucy returns to the minibar, where Rosa is waiting with the last of the alcohol.”

T “There it is.”

Re “Alright, great seeing you guys. I’ll bounce.”

T “We should all meet again for lunch sometime!”

A “Yeah, absolutely. It’s been forever since I’ve been in town, I would love to get
a tour of what’s new.”

Re “You got it, man. See ya.”

A “Bye, Reed.”

T “Actually, I should get going, too.”

T “I don’t want to get stuck in traffic.”

A “You’ve had the most to drink out of all of us, you gonna be alright?”
“She raises a smug eyebrow and starts walking to the exit.”

T “See you guys.”

Ro “Come visit me too, An-on. Stella and I would love to have you.”

“More people trickle out of the room until it’s just Lucy and I.”

“Naomi gives a thumbs-up to Lucy through the door to signal that everyone else has
left.”

F “Thanks, Naomi, couldn’t have organized this without you.”

N “Oh, don’t worry about it! It was nice getting to act like a class representative
again.”

“The Plastic Persimmon waves and lets the door swing closed with an echoing
*clang*.”

A “Sooo… Just the two of us…”

F “Damn you Anon and damn you Bill Withers.”

A “Ha! Still got it.”

F “Yeah yeah.”

“Lucy holds up a plastic bag that *clink*s with each shake.”

F “I was gonna offer you the last of these… Buuuut…”

A “Hey now, let’s not let those go to waste.”

“Her smug grin and laugh says enough.”

A “Rooftop?”

F “Rooftop. Now.”

“She leads the way through the darkened school hallways and stairwell.”
“I can picture all the old posters from my time here along the walls.”

“Oh hey, they finally replaced the door.”

“The door is booted open and the night air has finally cooled down to something
breathable now.”

“I turn to the ladder on the side of the stair enclosure and climb up.”

“Lucy hands me the bag and makes her own ascent.”

“From our new vantage point we can see all of the town lit up.”

“And with the stars above and no moon I would say the view is picturesque.”

F “Oi, you gonna hog the drinks?”

“I take out a pair of bottles, using one to pop the cap off the other.”

F “Show-off. They’re twist-offs, ya know.”

“To prove her point she takes the capped one and simply twists it’s top off.”

A “Ow. My ego.”

F “Pfffft. Anyways.”

A “A toast!”

-- A “Ahem. Fuck jannies, fuck triggers, and fuck ko-op.”

F “To adulthood!”

A “To stable employment!”

“We tap our bottles together and chug the sweet ambrosia down.”

F “Aaaaah. I needed this.”


A “Oh?”

“I’m already handing her a second bottle, knowing that she’ll finish her first with
her next chug.”

A “I guess you’ve been busy.”

-- F “Teenagers scare the living shit out of me.”

-- F “They could care less as long as someone will bleed.”

F “Dealing with teens is a fuckin’ nightmare.”

F “There’s this one brat, Kenny. The little shit has broken two trumpets already --
and his spine.”

A “Can’t be that bad.”

F “Well you see, it happened during band camp-”

“Lucy’s rant went on for what felt like an hour.”

“Though judging by the pile of beer bottles, it couldn’t have been more than twenty
minutes.”

F “-at the fucking dance of all places.”

A “Snrk.”

F “What!”

A “Sounds like us, honestly.”

F “Bullshit.”

A “For real! You were just as bad!”

“Lucy’s elbow finds it’s familiar spot in my side.”

F “Nuh uh.”
A “Yeah huh. Faaaaang.”

“She groans and hides her face in her knees.”

F “Why the fuck was I so edgy?”

A “Trish.”

F “Mrrrr… Okay, so maybe we were that bad.”

A “That’s life for ya.”

“She sighs and relaxes. Her legs stretch forward and she leans back on her arms.”

F “Yeah…”

F “That’s life…”

“I mimic her pose and find myself staring at the small dots spreading across the
night sky.”

A “Teacher at your alma mater. Wasn’t really expecting that, ya know.”

F “And you as a sound engineer? Pffft, I figured you’d be making a sexbot or


something.”

A “The self-cleaning subroutine never worked right.”

“We chuckle together.”

A “Hey, Lucy…”

“I keep my eyes on the stars, even when Lucy turns to look at me.”

“I can feel heat creep across my face.”

A “I got a contract with a studio here. I’m thinking…”

A “Since I’ll be here for a good while, how about we get some dinner sometime.”
A “Y’know… together…”

“I look at Lucy at last.”

“Her face is turned back to the sky, but there’s a dusting of pink across her
cheeks.”

F “I would… I totally would, Anon…”

F “But I’ve got work like you wouldn’t believe.”

A “O-oh. Well, if it’s too mu-”

F “However!”

“Something covers my hand.”

“I quick glimpse down and I see it’s Lucy’s atop mine.”

F “I’ve got time in the morning.”

F “So how bout breakfasts?”

“I smile.”

A “Is that a date then?”

F “I don’t know, is it?”

“Lucy turns back to me and smiles.”

A “It is, then.”

F “You’re such a dweeb.”

A “I know.”

“That didn’t stop Lucy from shuffling closer until our legs were pressed together.”
“That didn’t stop Lucy from leaning her head on my shoulder.”

“I grin and wrap my arm around her shoulder.”

“Feels just like old times, honestly.”

“Like no time has passed since I left Volcadera Bluff.”

“I guess I never did say goodbye to Volcano High.”

F “Thanks, now my face is forever stuck in a cringe, Anon.”

A “...Way to ruin the moment Fang.”

F “You ruined it first with your mumbling.”

A “Fix it then.”

F “You ruined it, you fix it.”

A “Fine I will.”

“My hand cups her cheek gently.”

“Lucy smiles and leans in.”

-- “Finally.”

-- F “EEP! MY TAIL!”

-- “AT LAST, MY ONE TRUE DESIRE!”

-- “TUGGING THE TAIL!”

“Ah, I missed this feeling.”

“Our lips meld together as we embrace just like we were teens again.”

“ENDING FOUR OF FOUR”


“-Fast Times At Volcano High-”

10e (super secret ending) (shitpost) (possible debug meme ending if something
breaks)
Fang is alone. She has no nothing, or no one left. Anon is dead, Her parents are
dead, and she has nothing going for her except for one thing, a local talk show
host invited her on after showing her laughably abysmal solo performance at a local
bar. She knows that the reason she was invited is so she could be made fun of, but
she went anyway. Fang had her plan. She found the best clothing she could find, a
red-and-yellow unisex get up. It was a strange and flamboyant getup, especially
for a woman like her, but it will do. She went to the bathroom and put on her
makeup and then started heading for the showroom. Once she got in she was escorted
to her prep room, she just sat there, watched television and waited for the host to
come and greet her. Fang soon heard a knock at the door and swiftly got up to meet
the TV host and his assistant. A short transaction happened between the three in
which Fang shows her admiration to the show host. The assistant is not too keen on
her, vaguely saying that she is “crazy” and it “wont work”, the host brushes it
off, he believes in her. After laying down some ground rules and when she’s coming
on, the host starts to leave. Fang then asks one favor of the host
“Murray, one small thing, when you bring me out, can you introduce me as
They/Them?”
The assistant then stubbornly asks “what's wrong with your real gender?”
“That’s how I introduced myself at the playing, They/them, remember?”
Murray then questions “Did she?”
“I don’t know” replied the assistant.
“If you say so kid, you know they/them it is. It's good!” Murray then exclaims.
“Thanks Murray” Fang finally replied with, happy they got their way.
The pair of executives then leave, leaving Fang alone to themselves until it's
their time to shine. They are eventually called into the area behind the curtains,
waiting for their own turn. They watched the Televisor, watching Murray show off
their clip again, laughing, making fun of them. Then, Fang is called to make their
grand appearance. They start dancing out of the curtains, starting slow, only to
start speeding up, spinning around gleefully, going back, and forth, enjoying
themselves to the attention and spotlight before shaking Murray’s hand, and proudly
kissing one of the co-hosts before sitting down.
“Well, that was quite an entrance!” Said Murray, quite surprised at the enthusiasm
that Fang had.
Fang stares around, taking it all in, she finally was on Live TV with their
favorite celebrity, finally in the spotlight like she always was meant to be.
Enjoying the experience for a moment, only for Murray to butt in with an obviously
not sympathetic
“You okay?”
Only for Fang to reply with “Yeah, this is exactly how I imagined it.”
Murray through his wit tried to recover the obviously awkward situation with a
witty joke.
“That makes one of us!”
The crowd laughed and clapped, Fang chuckled a little, loving the attention.
Murray then segwayed into their costume, a bright red coat with clown makeup. A
political symbol to most, but not to they/them.
Murray then pointed out that fact, saying “So tell us about this look, we spoke
earlier and you said this was not a political statement.”
Fang then replied soon after with “No, no it's not political, you see I'm just
trying to make people laugh!”
Murray then shut them down with “How’s that going for you?”
Fang then laughed uncontrollably, it made them feel better. Murray’s dig hit deep,
even if they didn’t want to realize that.
Murray then offered to Fang to sing a song. Something Fang wanted to do for a
while.
The crowd cheered, and Fang got excited. Fang smiled and pulled out her personal
book, a mix of music ideas and ranting. Murray then pointed out the obvious, the
book. The audience got a laugh out of that. Fang opened the book and flipped
around a bit, looking over their notes, thinking over at all.
Murray sarcastically said “take your time, we have all day, much to the audience's
amusement.”
“I am fat fuck”
“I am so fat I eat computers”
“Imagine being at computers”
“So fat you look and see food”

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