What is the meaning of understanding the self?

The meaning of understanding the self is having insight into one's own behavior, attitudes, strengths,
and weakness. It is the individual's ability to say and know what he or she is good at or needs
improvement. Self understanding is one of the highest goals in psychology.

Understanding the Self

Being unsure and insecure about understanding the self can result in not being successful or not caring
about life. It is important to understand the self and what type of person to be. Self-understanding is
necessary to get to a self-concept.

What is Self-Concept?

Self-concept is how the individual perceives oneself. It is the belief that an individual holds about
oneself. When someone asks, "Who am I?," an individual may answer "I am a teacher," "I am intelligent"
or "I am a good person." Self-concept is how a person describes him or herself. In youth, self-concept is
amenable. Young people are very impressionable and often change according to interactions and
experiences. Self-concept becomes more stable as people age. Knowing and understanding the self is
the most important human concept for a well-developed self-concept.

There are a few major psychologists known as humanistic psychologists who contributed to the
development of self-concept. Humanistic psychology focuses on the positives of mental health, the
ability of the individual to grow, and one's strengths and qualities. The components that contribute to
self-concept have been debated by various philosophers and are manifold. The development of the self
helps the individual understand who the self was in the past, who the self is in the present, and who the
self will be in the future.

One philosopher, Abraham Maslow was a humanist psychologist who focused his ideas of the self-
concept on stages that lead to self-actualization, which is exemplified by his graphic triangle of Hierarchy
of Needs. He lists many stages starting at the bottom of the triangle that an individual must complete
before escalating to reach the final stage of self-actualization at the top of the triangle. The Hierarchy of
Needs listed from the bottom are physiological needs, safety needs, love and belonging needs, esteem
needs, and, finally at the top, self-actualization. Self-actualization, according to Maslow, is the highest
potential a person can attain by being completely accepting and in agreement with the self and the
surroundings. So, in short, an individual will live at his or her highest self when he or she accepts the self,
others, and the surrounding world.

Another philosopher, Carl Rogers, believes that the self-concept has three parts: self-image, self-esteem
or self-worth, and the ideal self.

Self-image is the picture of the self in the mind. This self will define the individual self as intelligent, ugly,
fat, or beautiful. One might say "I am intelligent," or "I am fat."

Self-esteem is how an individual feels about the self and the achievements, abilities, and self-worth. An
individual may feel pride, despair, or shame. One might say, 'I am good at playing video games," or "I
never do anything right."
The ideal self is the self that one wishes to create based on experiences, societal expectations and any
role models the self may have. When the real self is not close to the ideal-self, the individual becomes
dissatisfied and disgruntled. Then the individual sees the self as a failure. Roger's overall belief is that all
humans are born with the innate desire to become the best self a human can be. He believed that the
behavior of an individual is based on the way the individual perceives their situation.

Another perspective on the self-concept focuses on six dimensions. These six dimensions (physical,
social, competence, family, affect, and academic) are an integral part of the development of self-
concept. The belief that all humans develop self in the space between self and interaction with society
are examined in each dimension. The six dimensions of self-concept are as follow:

Content Lecture/ Discussion DEFINITIONS OF SELF

 APA Dictionary of Psychology: Self is the totality of the individual, consisting of all characteristic
attributes, conscious and unconscious, mental and physical.

 William James: Self can refer either to the person as the target of appraisal (i.e., one
introspectively evaluates how one is doing) or to the person as the source of agency (i.e., one
attributes the source of regulation of perception, thought, and behavior to one’s body or mind).

 Carl Jung: The self gradually develops by a process of individuation, which is not complete until late
maturity is reached.

 Alfred Adler: The self is the individual’s lifestyle, the manner in which he or she seeks fulfillment.

What does it mean to

know yourself?
Knowing yourself is about discovering what makes you tick. Among other
things, it means:

 Learning your likes and dislikes

 Unearthing your beliefs and values
 Knowing your personal boundaries
 Accepting your personality traits
 Being a better team player
 Having a clearer path in your professional life
 Understanding how you interact with others
 Recognizing your core personal values
  Increasing your capacity for self-compassion
 Having a clearer idea of your life’s purpose
 Knowing what it takes to be self-motivated
 Being more adaptable

Ultimately, all of these things will increase your self-awareness .

Being more self-aware lends to enhanced self-development,
acceptance, and proactivity while benefiting our overall mental
health.

We’ll be more confident, make better decisions, have stronger

relationships, and be more honest .

The importance and

benefits of knowing one's
self
Knowing yourself is about knowing what makes you tick. It means
identifying what matters to you, your strengths and weaknesses,
your behaviors, tendencies, and thought patterns. This list
describes the importance and benefits of knowing one's self:

1. Despite your quirks, flaws, and insecurities, you learn

self-love and acceptance. Once you do, you can walk through
the world with more confidence and care less about what people
think.

2. You can change your personality flaws and improve on

your weaknesses. You are empowered to become who you want
to be. This will help you become a better, more well-rounded
person.
3. You’ll have more emotional intelligence, which is key to
knowing others. You’ll be more conscious of your own emotions
and feelings, making it easier to understand another person's
point of view.

4. You'll be more confident. Self-doubt disappears when you

know and accept yourself, and others won't influence you as
easily. It'll be easier to stand your ground .

5. You’ll forge better relationships. It’s easier to share

yourself when you know yourself. You’ll also know what kind of
people you get along with, so you can find your community .

6. You’ll be less stressed. Self-awareness will help you make

decisions that are better for you. And when this happens, you
become less stressed about what people think or whether you
made the right choice.

7. You’ll break patterns of disappointment. You'll

find repetitive behaviors that lead to poor outcomes
when you look inward. Once you name them, you can
break them.

8. You’ll be happier. Expressing who you are, loud

and proud, will help you improve your well-being.

9. You'll feel more alive. Being who you truly are

will give you energy, make you excited about life, and
make all your experiences feel richer.
10. You'll have more self-worth. Why is self-worth
important? Because it helps you avoid compromising
your core values and beliefs. Valuing yourself also
teaches others to respect you.
11. You'll understand your values. We can’t
understate the importance of knowing your values.
They will help you make decisions aligned with who
you are and what you care about.

12. You'll find purpose in life. Knowing purpose in

life will give you a clear idea of where you should go
and what you should do.

Getting to know yourself is hard. It involves deep self-reflection,

honesty, and confronting parts of yourself you might be afraid of.
But it’s a fundamental part of self-improvement.

If you need help, try working with a professional. BetterUp can

help you navigate your inner world.

How to know yourself

better
Now that we’re clear on the importance of knowing yourself, you
might not know where to get started. Let’s get into it.

Check your VITALS

Author Meg Selig coined the term VITALS as a guide for
developing self-knowledge. Its letters spell out the six core pillars
of self-understanding:

These are your guides for decision-making and setting your goals.
Understanding them will help you make decisions aligned with
your authentic self. Here are some example values:
1. Values
 Honesty
 Being helpful
 Loyalty
 Trust
 Wealth
 Family

You can see how each of these might lead to different life choices.
For example, if you value honesty, you might quit a job where you
have to lie to others.

2. Interests
Your interests are what you do without being asked, like your
hobbies, passions, and causes you care about. You can then try to
align your work with these interests. Here are some examples:

 Climate change. If you’re passionate about this issue, you

might choose to work directly on the problem. Or you can
make choices that allow for a more sustainable lifestyle, like
owning an electric car.

 Audio editing. Perhaps you’re an amateur musician, and

you spend your time recording and editing audio. You can
start working as a freelance editor or find a job that uses
these skills.
 Fitness. If you love working out and value helping others,
you might consider becoming a trainer at your local gym or
leading a running group.

Not all of your interests need to be a side-hustle . But being aware

of them can help you make decisions that better suit your desired
life. It is really about knowing your priorities.
3. Temperament
Your temperament describes where your energy comes from. You
might be an introvert and value being alone. Or, as an extrovert,
you find energy being around others.

Knowing your temperament will help you communicate your

needs to others.

If you’re a meticulous planner going on a trip, you should

communicate this to your more spontaneous travel buddy. They
might feel suffocated by your planning, leading to arguments
down the road. Bringing it up before your trip will help talk it out
to avoid conflict later.

4. Around-the-clock activities
This refers to when you like to do things. If you’re a writer and
you’re more creative at night, carve out time in the evening to
work. If you prefer working out in the morning, make it happen.
Aligning your schedule with your internal clock will make you a
happier human being.

5. Life-mission and goals

Knowing your life mission is about knowing what gives your life
meaning. It gives you purpose, a vocation , and something to
strive for.

To find your life mission, think about what events were most
meaningful to you so far. For example:

 Leading a successful project at the office

 Influencing positive change through your work
 Helping someone else succeed
There are many ways to fulfill a life mission. You can fulfill your
goals with the skills and resources you have. For example,
“helping someone succeed” could mean becoming a teacher or
mentoring a young professional.

6. Strengths and weaknesses

These include both “hard skills” (like industry-specific knowledge
and talents) and “soft skills” (like communication or emotional
intelligence ).

When you do what you’re good at, you’re more likely to succeed,
which will improve your morale and mental health.

Knowing your weaknesses and toxic traits will help you improve
on them or minimize their influence on your life.

How to improve your self-

knowledge?
Are you ready to get started? There are many ways to understand
your inner self:

 Write in a journal
 Meditate
 Be curious
 Step out of your comfort zone
 Track your progress
 Choose smart habits
Importance of Self-Awareness and Self-Reflection

1. Personal Growth
o Self-awareness helps you understand your values, emotions, strengths, and
weaknesses.
o Self-reflection allows you to evaluate your actions, thoughts, and experiences to
grow from them.
o Together, they help build emotional intelligence, maturity, and a clearer sense of
identity.
2. Improved Decision-Making
o When you are self-aware, you make choices that align with your goals and values.
o Reflecting on past decisions helps you learn from mistakes and make better
choices in the future.
3. Stronger Relationships
o Understanding yourself helps you understand others better.
o You become more empathetic, communicate more effectively, and handle conflict
more constructively.
4. Better Mental Health
o Reflection can help manage stress, anxiety, and negative thought patterns.
o Being aware of your emotions lets you respond more calmly and mindfully to
challenges.
5. Increased Accountability
o Self-reflection encourages responsibility for your actions.
o It helps you recognize when you need to improve and take action rather than
blame others.
6. Goal Setting and Motivation
o You set more meaningful and realistic goals when you know yourself.
o Reflection keeps you focused and motivated by tracking your progress and
learning from setbacks.
7. Professional Development
o In work environments, self-awareness leads to better leadership, teamwork, and
adaptability.
o Reflective professionals continually improve their performance and learn from
feedback.

What is Self-Awareness?
Self-awareness is the ability to recognize and understand your own thoughts, emotions,
behaviors, and motivations. It means being conscious of how you feel, why you feel that way,
and how your actions affect yourself and others.
Key Aspects of Self-Awareness:

1. Emotional Awareness
o Recognizing your emotions as they happen (e.g., “I’m feeling stressed right
now”).
o Understanding the cause of your feelings.
2. Self-Knowledge
o Knowing your strengths and weaknesses.
o Understanding your values, beliefs, and goals.
3. Behavioral Awareness
o Being aware of how you act and how others perceive you.
o Understanding how your behavior affects your relationships and outcomes.
4. Self-Reflection
o Taking time to think about your thoughts, actions, and experiences to gain insight.

What is Self-Reflection?
Self-reflection is the process of thinking deeply about your thoughts, actions, experiences, and
decisions. It involves looking back on what you've done, how you felt, and what you can learn
from it to improve yourself moving forward.

Key Aspects of Self-Reflection:

1. Looking Inward
o Asking yourself honest questions like:
“Did I handle that situation well?”
“What could I have done differently?”
2. Learning from Experience
o Understanding what worked, what didn’t, and why.
o Using past experiences to grow and avoid repeating mistakes.
3. Improving Self-Awareness
o Reflection deepens your understanding of your own values, emotions, and
behaviors.
4. Setting Goals and Making Changes
o Helps you make better choices in the future.
o Encourages personal and professional development.
 Stages Influential Figure Conflict or Crisis Possible Results from Resolving
to be resolved Conflict or Crisis
Favorable Results Unfavorable
Results
Infancy (from
birth to 18
months)
Early Childhood
(18 months to 3
years)
Late Childhood –
Preschool-(3-5
years)
School Age (6-12
years)
Adolescence (12-
20 years)
Young Adulthood
(20-25)
Adulthood (25-65
years)
Maturity (65 years
to death)

Stages of Adolescence: Late

Adolescence and Emerging
Adulthood
Late adolescence is termed as emerging adulthood. It comprises
adolescents ages 19 to 25. By age standards, late adolescents are
considered adults, but development is not entirely finished. This
stage of adolescence has five key features: the age of identity
exploration, the age of instability, the age of self-focus, the age of
feeling in-between, and the age of possibilities.
Physical Changes of Late Stages of Adolescence
Females in late adolescents are fully developed entering emerging
adulthood. Contrarily, males are not. Males in late adolescence and
emerging adulthood grow in height, weight, muscle mass, and body
hair. Primary sex characteristics are already developed.
Susceptibility to physical illness is the lowest during late
adolescents. It is the peak of physical health.

Cognitive Changes of Late Stages of Adolescence

The main distinction of cognitive changes in late adolescence is that
emerging adults have the skill of expressing their thoughts, feelings,
and views to others. Thinking now originates from the front of the
brain, lending them the ability to delay gratification. Future
accomplishment is exceptionally important.
 Developed reasoning: Late adolescents have better use of
complex thinking; they adequately make informed decisions that
are less self-centered.
 Global concepts: Opinions about global concepts like justice,
politics, and patriotism are formed.
 Expressing ideas: They verbalize their opinions to others and
hear both sides to a viewpoint.
 Shifted focus: They question their role in society and how they
can contribute (i.e. career, volunteer work).
 Examination: Emerging adults examine inner experiences and
the meaning of the world.
Social and Emotional Development of Late Stages
of Adolescence
Emerging adults are emotionally stable in comparison to their early
and middle adolescent counterparts. Identity formation and self-
concept is improved. Relationships benefit positively. Friends remain
a source of support, family ties are appreciated, and romantic
relationships are a serious component of emerging adulthood.
Arnett gives five key features of late adolescence that are apparent
in social and emotional development.
 Age of identity exploration: Emerging adults explore their
options in love, sexual orientation, work, and making choices to
 benefit their purpose. Independence allows them to actively try
out these options.
 Age of instability: As they entertain various life choices, there
is little stability. An example of instability is moving out of a
parent’s house to live in college dorms.
 Age of self-focus: The capacity to focus on others definitely
exists, but late adolescence is self-focused because emerging
adults attempt to hone on their skills for a productive, purposeful
life.
 Age of feeling in-between: The legal adult age and an
emerging adult’s responsibilities do not match. They are in limbo
with partial adult responsibility while adjusting to establishing
their identities.
 Age of possibilities: Possibilities seem endless in emerging
adulthood. Choices are not certain, and with adult independence,
they are optimistic about their future.

Depression and Emotional

Problems in the Stages
Adolescence
Depression is a mood disorder causing a persistent feeling of
sadness for two weeks or more. The National Institute of Mental
Health has documented that “3.1 million adolescents aged 12 to 17
in the United States had at least one major depressive episode.”
While teenagers are stereotypes as moody, excessive emotional
swings can indicate a true emotional problem. Many suffer from
depression, anxiety, and eating disorders related to their changing
bodies. Female adolescents are more at risk from emotional
problems than males. Behaviors such as violence at school, bullying,
poor school performance, drinking and drugs, and not having friends
are indicative of a deeper problem. An observant, receptive parent
or guardian is essential to determine if behavior warrants
professional intervention. With loving adults and peers, an
adolescent can thrive!
Supporting Your Child
Through the Stages of
Adolescence
The stages of adolescence are a stress inducing, emotional period
for everyone involved. Parents of adolescents often sense they are
in over their heads. Support during adolescence is vital to
development, so experts have compiled a list of tips to guide your
child through adolescence.
 Be a role model: Throughout the stages of adolescence, every
young person has a role model. Parents should exemplify
behavior and values they want their children to display.
 Set limits: Adolescents will defy rules and test limits. That is a
fact of growing up. However, providing them with structure
keeps them safe and shows them that there are consequences
for their actions.
 Communication: Talk out matters of conflict. Your adolescent
has to feel comfortable addressing their worries. Find the
communication style of your adolescent for open
communication.
 Explain why: Ensure you inform your adolescent why you
expect the behavior that you do (i.e. for their safety). Do not
settle for averting the point with a “because I said so.”
Adolescents must learn to reason and make the connection with
their possible decisions.
 Listen: Listen to what your adolescent has to say. Your
adolescent wants to be heard. They deserve the same respect.
Late adolescence (typically ages 17 to 21) marks the transition from teenage years into
adulthood. It is characterized by significant cognitive, emotional, social, and physical
development. Here are the key characteristics:

1. Cognitive Development

 Advanced reasoning and abstract thinking: Ability to think about the future, complex
concepts, and hypothetical situations.
 Improved decision-making: More capacity for weighing long-term consequences,
though impulsivity may still occur.
 Formation of personal values and ethics: More independent thinking about morality
and beliefs.

2. Emotional Development

 Stronger self-identity: Solidifying a sense of self, including gender identity, beliefs, and
goals.
 Greater emotional stability: Better emotional regulation compared to earlier
adolescence.
 Increased independence: Desire for autonomy and self-direction in life choices.

3. Social Development

 More mature relationships: Deeper and more emotionally intimate friendships and
romantic relationships.
 Peer influence decreases: More confidence in one’s own decisions and values.
 Preparation for adult roles: Focus on career, higher education, and long-term goals.

4. Physical Development

 Completion of physical maturation: Most individuals reach full adult height and sexual
maturity.
 Brain development continues: Particularly in the prefrontal cortex (responsible for
planning, impulse control, and judgment).
5. Identity and Future Orientation

 Career planning: Exploration of vocational interests and post-secondary education or

employment.
 Identity consolidation: Making choices related to lifestyle, values, religion, and political
beliefs.