Captivate (Knot Their Omega) E. J. Lawson PDF: (4.7/5.0 - 500 Downloads)
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CAPTIVATE
KNOT THEIR OMEGA
E.J. LAWSON
Copyright © 2022 by Thorn House Publishing Inc.
“HOLY SHIT,” I say aloud to no one but my empty office and the computer in front of me. Sitting
back in my rickety old desk chair, I fan myself with my hand. “There’s that contract finished.”
I peruse over the final chapter I just finished writing for my client, checking for spelling errors
and the occasional word mix-up. The completed manuscript looks good, especially with the
explosive ending scene. Hot enough to literally set fire to the rain. It’s definitely spicy enough to set
me on fire, and I wrote the damn thing. Her readers will be needing a change of panties. I know I do.
Every time I have to ghostwrite romance, I get all squirmy and hot writing the sex scenes.
Of course, squirmy and hot is a better alternative to the dark loneliness I feel when I write out the
romantic scenes, the ones with the epic love confessions and handsome Alphas and Betas doing
anything for their Omegas. Those just hurt. I wince, but not even the reminder of what I can’t ever
have douses the flames still lingering in my core from writing that spicy group scene.
Did I touch the thermostat?
God, it’s hot in my office.
Almost as if I’m…
Shit.
I jump out of my desk chair so fast it topples over onto the carpet with a muted thud. I dash toward
the bathroom, only to trip over the bedroom slippers I left scattered in my front hallway. I catch
myself with one hand on the wall before I hit the floor completely and cuss out my past self.
When I work, I get into this perfect headspace where I can tune out the outside world and just
write and write and write. The downside? I forget to take care of myself and end up forgetting things
like tidying up after myself, eating three meals a day… or taking my goddamned heat suppressants.
I hurtle myself into the bathroom and catch a glimpse of my reflection in the mirrored door of the
medicine cabinet. I’m an absolute mess, but that’s nothing new when I’ve been working. My straight
dark hair actually has some volume to it, not because of any miracle product, but because I’ve been
running my hands through it roughly every time I blank out on a scene or can’t remember the perfect
word to use. Now my hair is in this messy “I survived a hurricane” hairstyle. The shadows under my
eyes nearly match the violet shade of my irises.
But it’s the flush in my cheeks and slightly enlarged pupils in my eyes that startle me most. I know
what they mean.
Normally, after I finish a manuscript, I send it off to the client and then fall into bed, waking up
sixteen hours later hungry and ready to work all over again.
Not this time.
A jab of anxiety pierces my gut as I rip open the cabinet, already having a pretty good idea of
what I’ll find. Or more accurately, what I won’t find.
“Please,” I whine to myself, digging past the empty bottle in the front labeled falsely as aspirin to
the many others behind it. “Please, please, please.”
I shake bottle after bottle, hoping for that familiar rattle of pills, but there’s no sound at all. I’m
out of heat suppressants.
“Fuck!”
How could I let this happen?
I pinch the bridge of my nose and slam the cabinet shut so hard that the lock doesn’t engage and
the door bounces back toward me. Frustrated at my own irresponsibility, I lean in closer to the mirror,
checking for the unmistakable signs of impending heat. My cheeks have a slight pink flush, but it’s
faint enough that I would probably be the only one to notice it.
The dilation in my pupils isn’t too bad yet, either, and while I feel that familiar thrum of need like
a distant drumbeat echo in my core, I don’t have the crazed, fidgety feeling that normally goes along
with it. Which means there’s still time to fix this. But when I inhale deeply to calm my nervous system
I can already smell my Omega pheromones mixing with the cool but stale air of my apartment.
“Think, Rile,” I demand to myself. When did I take my last pill?
There was that chapter I wrote, the one with all the groveling. I’d gotten up to make a sandwich
and had taken one then. But that was what? Two days ago?
I shake my head at my own idiocy.
Panic starts to bubble in my chest like a broken fountain.
I’m never this irresponsible, not even when I was juggling my former job at the bookstore with my
current ghostwriting work. I strip out of my ratty sweatpants and thin T-shirt, push open the shower
curtain, and step into the small but clean shower, turning on the hot water. ‘Small but clean’ describes
everything about my efficient apartment.
It isn’t a dump by any means, but there’s nothing about it that whispers welcome home. Nothing
about it that shows any emotion or sentiment other than ‘this is a place to live, and nothing more’,
aside from the small nest I’ve made for myself in my bedroom.
I grab a washcloth and coat it with scent-blocking body wash, much more than the directions
recommend, but who actually pays attention to those anyway? I need to smell like something else,
someone else, if I’m going to be able to leave the apartment.
The body wash smells like vanilla and cinnamon, almost like a holiday cookie, but it works
wonders and is worth the hefty price tag. Some people might buy their toiletries based on quality and
the ability to make them look beautiful, but I just shop based on safety. And this body wash keeps me
safe.
After I’ve scrubbed my skin until it is pink and raw, and allowed the scent-blocker to remain on
my skin, burning slightly for a few minutes before rinsing it off, I’m satisfied my Omega scent is
covered for now. I turn off the shower and step out onto the rug, shivering in the cool air before I
wrap myself in a gray-striped towel.
The scent-blocker should normally last about twelve hours, but given the heat trying to build at my
core, I’d give it maybe six before I’ll need another wash. Long enough for me to meet up with
Kennedy and get what I need.
I go into the bedroom and dress in another plain T-shirt and jeans, tying my wet hair up into a
messy bun. I won’t put on makeup or dress nice for a meeting with Kennedy. I don’t want anything to
stand out about me, anything that would cause any Alpha—hell, any person—to look at me twice. I
grab my cell phone from my dresser and scroll through my contacts until I find the one I need.
Kennedy picks up after three rings, his naturally sleepy voice coming clear through the speaker.
“Hey, sexy lady.”
“Hey,” I say back, glancing around my room as if someone could possibly be eavesdropping.
Some paranoia never really leaves you. “I need more suppressants, Ken. I messed up my schedule,
and now I’m completely out.”
He whistles, long and low. “That’s not good, Rile. How long has it been?”
“Two, maybe three days?”
He is quiet for a moment, probably calculating dosages in his head. “I can get you back on track, I
think. It will have to be a higher dosage than you’re used to. Can you meet at the usual place in an
hour?”
“Any chance you’d make a house call? Just this once?”
“You know it doesn’t work like that, babe.”
I sigh.
“Right. All good. I’ll see you in an hour then.”
He hangs up without a goodbye, and I clutch the phone to my chest, my hands shaking.
What a mess. At least Kennedy is a decent guy, not one of those skeezy drug dealers you see in the
movies or on the news. He sells suppressants to help Omegas stay under the radar and designer drugs
for Alphas with cash to spend, like rut-blockers or focus enhancers, or just plain old party drugs for
having a good time. But while technically almost everything Kennedy sells is helpful in some way,
it’s still illegal. Omegas aren’t allowed heat suppressants without the permission of the family whose
care they’re in or their packs. Since I have neither, it’s pills of the illegal sort for me.
I open up my top drawer to find the pair of red woolen socks I have balled up in the back and turn
them inside out. A roll of cash falls out, and I count out the money I’ll need for today’s exchange.
Once I have it, there’s only about a fourth of the cash left to tuck back into my hiding place.
I’ll have to take on several more contracts to make up for the loss, but it’s worth the extra hours of
work. I pull on my boots, tuck the money into my nondescript purse, and steel myself before heading
out the door for my meeting with Kennedy.
THE ‘USUAL PLACE’ is a café called Charlie’s, which serves decent coffee drinks and pastries
near the university. Anyone outside this sort of life might think that these unsavory exchanges happen
in darkened alleys or abandoned apartments, but it simply isn’t true. Drugs can be passed around just
as easily in a family restaurant, sometimes more easily because it doesn’t look suspicious. No one
expects a drug deal to go down in the same place where they just celebrated Grandma’s birthday.
Kennedy prefers Charlie’s because he blends in, looking like one of the college students that
frequent the place between classes. In another universe, it would be easy to picture him kicking
around a soccer ball or hacky sack on the lawn in front of the student union.
There are no Alphas in here, and no one has glanced my way yet other than the teenage server
behind the counter, and that’s probably just to see if I’m done with my iced coffee yet so she can wipe
down the lop-sided table.
My heat symptoms are getting worse, exacerbated by my own anxiety. If I don’t get control of it,
something far worse than my heat will rear its ugly head.
Right on cue, a tick makes my head jerk and I force myself to breathe slow and easy to soothe my
rapidly beating heart. My hands won’t stop trembling, and dizzy spells come over me in short bursts
every few minutes. The iced coffee is helping to keep my temperature low, and I wrap my hands
firmly around the cup, sloughing the condensation off with my fingers.
I feel like I’m swaying in my seat, but again, no one has noticed, or they are too polite to say
something. Or maybe they have noticed and just think I’m drunk. That would be the perfect cover, and
I’d get in a lot less trouble for daytime inebriation than for illegally suppressing my heats.
The dull bell over the door rings, and Kennedy comes through, a wide cocky grin on his face and
a messy stack of mail in the crook of his arm. The guy is a total beach boy, heart and soul, from his
long blond curls to the woven flip-flops on his feet, even though it’s nearly November and there’s a
constant chill in the air. Even his little yellow coupe has a surfboard strapped to the top, like he’s
going to find the perfect wave driving down the streets of downtown Rogers City.
“Hey, sexy,” he says, angling his lanky body over me and giving me a tight squeeze. “I’ve missed
you.” He plants a cheeky kiss on my forehead before sitting in the wobbly chair across from me. He
plops his pile of mail on top of the table–and on top of the envelope of cash I’ve had sitting there
since I arrived. Then he stretches out his arms and sprawls his legs into the aisleway, looking as
casual and relaxed as can be.
“Missed you too,” I say, giving him a shy grin. To any outsider, we look like close friends, maybe
even college kids in the throes of their first real relationship. Sometimes I wish we were in a
relationship. Everything would be so much easier. But while I enjoy Kennedy’s company, and I know
he’d take care of me and treat me right, it isn’t meant to be. He’s a Beta, and neither of us is attracted
to each other in any way other than friends. “How’s life treating you?”
“Same as always,” he says, stealing my iced coffee and taking a big gulp. I swat at his hand
playfully, and he grins at me, showing off dimples that would rival Shirley Temple’s. “How’s your
mom doing?”
“Recovering well,” I say with a shrug. “The orthopedic doctor says she can start walking without
the crutches now.” It’s all a lie, a made-up conversation to keep the façade going. My mom is long
gone, dead when I was three from cervus, a wasting disease that targets Omega genes, making us rare
and decreasing our population as a whole. I have very little memory of my mother, other than the
legacy she left me–the cervus now running through my own veins, slowly killing me.
“That’s good,” continues Kennedy, still keeping up the ruse. “I feel sorry for her physical
therapist. Your mom is kind of a firecracker.”
“That she is,” I agree, swirling the plastic straw around in the coffee, clicking the half-melted ice
cubes against the sides of the cup. “You should have seen her when they took the cast off. She was
ready to march right out of the hospital all on her own.”
My chest pangs, imagining living in a world where what I was saying was true.
“Well, I hope she’s back to her grouchy self again soon. And what about you? How’s the writing
going?” Kennedy waggles his brown eyebrows at me with a goofy leer on his pouty lips. “Anything
salacious you can read me? Possibly while in my bed, feeding me grapes?”
“Yeah, that dream will never come true. And you know I can’t read you anything. I’ve got my
name written on enough NDAs to keep me quiet for life.”
“You could always write me my own story. Something sexy, just for me.” He winks at me, and I
shake my head with an indulgent smile.
“Absolutely not. Besides, you’d only want sexy surfer stories, and that would get old after a
while, trust me.”
“What’s wrong with surfers?” he protests, gesturing at his entire body.
I give a dramatic performance, checking him out and letting my eyes catch on every bit of him
before shaking my head dismissively. “Sex and sand don’t mix.”
He opens his mouth to complain, and then snaps it shut again. “Yeah, you’re right on that one. It
gets everywhere. And I mean everywhere.” He grimaces with a full body shudder. “Look, I gotta get
going. I’m meeting Zoe for dinner later.” Never mind that Zoe is the name of his Himalayan cat, and
dinner just means opening up a can of gourmet kitty chow for her.
Kennedy stands and stretches with a leonine yawn, showing off sleek abs that should be making
me drool, but I can only admire them aesthetically, the way one would look at a Greek statue. He
scoops up his mail again, leaving behind an envelope next to my nearly empty cup. “See you around,
Rile.” He lumbers out of the café, the bell over the door announcing his exit.
I exhale slowly, leaning back into the café chair and closing my eyes. Kennedy is extra smooth at
these types of exchanges, but I can’t help the anxiety that overtakes me every time. I pick up the
envelope from the table—identical to the original one but with completely different contents—and
tuck it safely into my purse. I wait a few more minutes, finishing up my coffee, and then stand and
head straight to the bathroom.
I stop a moment to catch my breath, which has become shallower over the past few minutes, then I
tear open the envelope and pull out one of the heat suppressants. The pill is white and chalky, leaving
traces on my fingers as I toss it back and lean over the faucet to bring a palmful of water to my lips as
I swallow it.
The relief is immediate, not because the little white pill is working, but because I know it will. I
take a second one, knowing Kennedy is right about needing to up the dose for a few days, and wipe
the back of my hand across my lips before leaving the café.
A wooden bench sits out on the sidewalk, and I make my way over to it, collapsing on the seat. I
try to keep my inhales and exhales steady and rhythmic, and eventually my lungs are able to take
deeper and deeper breaths. After two dizzy spells that make my stomach lurch, I finally start to feel
like myself again. Truly myself, not what my Omega genetics tell me I am. I am more than my heat,
more than what my body dictates, and if it takes heat suppressants, scent blocking soaps, and an
arsenal of sex toys to keep myself safe, then so be it.
At last, I trust my legs not to collapse under me when I stand, and when I touch my fingers to the
back of my neck, it feels cold and clammy instead of the dry fever it had before. Clarity comes back
to my mind, instead of the constant thoughts of run hide run that were swirling around in my brain
earlier. This was a mistake, but it’s not one that can happen again. With a deep, bracing breath, I
gather up my purse with the precious pills inside and head down the street.
TWO
—
RILEY
MY APARTMENT BUILDING is only a few blocks away, and the bookstore where I used to
work is just down the street from Charlie’s, between the two. Despite the November winds, it feels
too good outside to be locked up in my apartment, even if that’s where I should be. My Betas-only
building is the safest place for me right now, never mind that I had to lie on five different forms and
break about eight laws to get in…
Go home, Riley.
Ugh.
The ache for normalcy is real.
The cluttered old bookstore looks the same as it did when I applied there two years ago, fresh off
a Greyhound bus with one suitcase to my name. I needed an income and a place to stay under the
radar. The bookstore provided both for a while. The owner let me crash on the couch in the back
room, at least until I could afford first month’s rent and the deposit for my apartment.
The only difference in the old shop’s appearance now is that the front window display is filled
with cozy mysteries, other autumn-themed books, and an abundance of cheap fake leaves. Otherwise,
it’s still the same haven I needed back then.
A quick stop to say hi to Caroline won’t hurt.
I do a quick sniff over my shoulder and take stock of how I’m feeling, deciding it should be
relatively safe. There’s a good chance no one besides Care will even be in there at this time on a
Tuesday.
When I enter the brownstone building, my friend looks up from behind the counter with a big grin.
“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” she says, typing something into the system before coming around
the corner and giving me a hug. There’s no need to worry about her possibly picking up on any
pheromones. Caroline is a Beta, and in her mind, so am I. She’s never given any indication that she
thinks otherwise, and honestly, I think if she knew I was really an Omega, she wouldn’t say anything
anyway.
“Sorry I haven’t texted back lately, I was really in the zone with the last project,” I say, offering a
guilty smile, breathing in the calming, familiar scent of books and old wood. “It’s nice to be back.”
“You should stop by more often then,” she pouts, flipping her auburn braid behind her shoulder.
“This place isn’t the same without you. I miss you.”
My heart twinges at her honest words. I really did love working at the bookstore, but it was too
hard to manage hiding my Omega status in a place that was so easily accessible. I never knew who
was going to be around at any moment, even if it’s a place where Alphas don’t usually hang out. They
prefer fancier locations, or places where they can show off their physicality, like gyms or bars or
pool halls. “How is it going here? Is the shop doing okay?”
“Same old, same old. Customers still like to take books off the shelves and put them in the wrong
spot. Teenagers come in and read the manga and leave them on the floor without paying for them. The
usual.” She narrows her bright blue eyes at me. “What about you? How’s the ghostwriting world?
Any best sellers under your belt?”
“It’s going very well, actually. I’ve built up a lot of repeat clients, and I’ve been able to raise my
rates. Besides, I get to spend my days writing about happy endings. What’s better than that?”
“There’s tons in life better than that, girl. You need to take the next step and write for yourself.
Get your name out there. Write what you want instead of just what sells for your clients, you know?”
I do know, but I really don’t want to have this talk again. The truth is that I’m just not ready to
write for myself yet. I have nothing worth saying. My clients give me very detailed storyboards and
character maps and ideas. They have those because they live actual lives instead of being trapped in a
square box fifteen stories off the ground ninety eight percent of the time.
I’ve always loved to write. I’m just grateful I get to make money doing something I love, even if
it’s not entirely for myself.
Caroline pulls a wrinkled dust rag from her apron and wipes down shelves that are already
spotless from when she probably dusted an hour ago. “I mean, the happy little Omega in the happy
little Pack, making happy little babies… or the Beta who finds his or her way into a pack of loving
Alphas–which are the exceptions, not the rule.”
I roll my eyes.
“Come on, Rile, even you have to admit it’s all corny fantasy. And if it’s not that, it’s forbidden
romances between Betas and Omegas, or Betas and Alphas, or Alphas and Alphas. Sure, they happen,
but it sets up unrealistic expectations. You and I are both going to end up with another Beta, and
there’s nothing wrong with that.”
When I wince at her judgmental words and look away, Caroline realizes what she said and hangs
her head with a sigh. “I’m sorry, Riley. That was rude of me. I didn’t mean that what you’re writing
isn’t good, it’s just… I don’t know. It’d be nice to see something real on the bestseller lists for once,
you know?”
I lift a shoulder, not wanting to go any deeper into this argument. “It’s fine, Care. I get what you’re
saying, sometimes I do want to write something a little more real. A little more raw. It isn’t like you
have a particularly unique opinion about the genre. A lot of people don’t take romance stories
seriously. But it’s the type of book that sells well with my clients. Reading is an escape from the
mundane. It doesn’t have to be realistic; it just has to make the reader feel something.”
“You’re so right,” Caroline says, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment. “I blame my shitty
attitude on it being that time of the month.”
She gives me a conspiratorial look, not knowing that I have never and will never have a period
like she and every other Beta gets.
I dig around in my purse, finding the fancy chocolate bar with freeze dried raspberry pieces
dotted on top, and hand it to her. “Here,” I say. “I swear chocolate makes everything better.”
Caroline makes an adorable snorting noise and takes the chocolate with a smile. “You’re my
hero,” she says, tearing it open to take a bite directly from the bar like some sort of savage. “What
project are you working on now?”
Before I can give her a generic, non-NDA-breaking update on my current projects, a harried
mother and three boisterous children come in through the shop door. I wave Caroline on so she can
greet her new customers and head over to the romance section of the bookstore. I love going through
the shelves to try and find any books I’ve ghostwritten. Even though my name isn’t anywhere on the
cover, I like to buy them for my own collection, displaying them on the shelves like trophies. I like to
know that something I wrote made someone else happy. It’s one of the best rushes I’ve experienced.
After searching through a few shelves, I come upon an old historical romance that I wrote, one
based on the fairy tale of Beauty and the Beast. In the book, a brave young Omega trades her own
freedom for her father’s and goes to live with a reclusive, scarred, moody Alpha. As always, she
wins over his grumpy heart, and they fall madly in love and experience the all-important happily ever
after. It was one of my favorite projects, and I’ve never seen it in print in the store before. I tuck it
under my arm, and crouch down to sift through the lower shelves, looking for more treasures.
The sound of slow footsteps in the aisle, muffled by the thin brown carpet, startles me enough that
I nearly topple back off my heels. When I look up to find the source, a tall Alpha perusing the science
fiction section, his full mouth twisted in concentration, my lips part in surprise. He has an arm full of
books and seems to be picking out yet another novel to add to the heavy load.
I picked this bookstore to work in when I first came to town because Alphas weren’t their usual
clientele. It was easy enough to busy myself in the back room and let Care handle them whenever one
did come in, but it was so rare that I could be at ease pretty much all the time.
My heart begins to beat faster, and my throat tightens as if I’m choking on the air around me. I
don’t want him to see me, but I can’t try and hide from him either. That would be even more
suspicious. I take a deep breath to fight the anxiety that drapes over me like a suffocating cloak.
Focusing on the multi-colored spines of the paperback books on the lower shelf, I say each title aloud
in my head slowly to keep my focus anywhere but on the threat just a few feet away.
The Alpha’s footsteps get closer and louder until it would be weird if I didn’t at least give a
friendly nod or something.
I twist my head up to look at him, my throat dry.
The Alpha gives me a strange look, his nose wrinkled in confusion. I bite down hard on my lip
until it hurts. He must’ve caught my scent. The suppressants haven’t fully kicked in yet and the
blockers didn’t work, and this is it. I’m going to be found out. Either this Alpha is going to claim me
right here and now or he’ll turn me over to the authorities and I’ll never go home again. I’ll be paired
off with a pack against my will. One of the worst kinds. And they’ll…
Oh god.
I should run but I can’t move.
But instead of growling at me or coming on to me, he simply asks, “Are you comfortable down
there?” in a soft, teasing tone.
For a second, I don’t register his words, blinking up at him like a baby owl. Then I realize what
exactly he has asked, and I jump up from my awkward crouch on the floor, nearly knocking over a
display of Choose Your Own Adventure books. His expression is too neutral to be reacting to my
natural scent. If he were picking up on it, he’d be all over me, trying to mark me as his own and
posturing for all Alphas in the area to see. Unless he’s already bonded, but I don’t see any markings
over his collarbone or up the sides of his neck.
“Just getting a better look at the lower shelves,” I mumble, stepping out of the way for him to pass
by.
He doesn’t.
He smiles at me, a friendly smile with no apparent ulterior motive. I try to make my heart calm
down, though I don’t relax completely. Even the kindest Alpha is still a predator. “I get it. I used to
hang out in bookstores as a kid, sprawled out on the floor with a dozen books piled around me. It
doesn’t work so well now that I’m much taller. I don’t fit in the aisles as well.” He winks at me, and
my heart begins to beat for a completely different reason than fear.
He’s handsome, tall and lean with light brown hair and sparkling hazel eyes. His smile is
crooked, hitching up on the left side more than the right, giving him an impish look that’s counteracted
by the dimple in his left cheek. “What are you reading?”
I twist the book away from my chest for him to see. He raises his eyebrows at the half-naked
Alpha on the cover, leaning over an Omega maiden in a very low-cut peasant dress. “I think we have
different tastes in books.” He holds up a copy of Isaac Asimov’s short stories, complete with a
solemn black and white photo of the author on the cover. I roll my eyes at him, because defending the
romance genre twice in ten minutes has to be some sort of record.
“Romance is just as legitimate as any other genre,” I say, reciting my usual argument.
The Alpha grimaces, waving his free hand in a so-so gesture. “I don’t know about that. Romance
books aren’t very realistic, are they?”
There’s a bantering tone to his voice that puts me at ease instead of making me want to tear him a
new one.
“But it’s not about realism.” I gesture at the book of short stories clutched in his long fingers.
“And isn’t true love something you’d see before aliens and UFOs?”
He throws back his head and laughs, a warm noise that feels comforting, like curling up next to the
fire with a homemade blanket. I think I catch his scent, but it’s so similar to the scents already around
me that it’s difficult to distinguish. Old paper and warm wood.
“Touché. Of course, we could always mix the two together and read some sci-fi romances. Aliens
whispering sweet nothings into each other’s ears. Best of both worlds.”
“Oh, those definitely exist. Trust me. I’ve written a few.” I immediately wince at my words. I
didn’t mean to reveal any personal information, not to an Alpha.
His clever eyes instantly narrow on my face. “You’re a writer?” He gestures at the overladen
shelves next to us. “That’s so cool. Are any of these novels yours?”
“I can’t tell you that,” I say in my best teasing tone. “Under penalty of death.” When his lips quirk
up in amused confusion, I add, “I’m a ghost writer. I’ve signed a lot of NDAs. I couldn’t tell you if
any of these books are mine, even if I wanted to.”
He frowns at my answer, full lips turning down at the corners. “Don’t you want to get credit for
your work?” he asks, but I shake my head in response.
“Not really. I’ve never been someone who wanted fame or publicity. I just like to write. I like to
take someone else’s idea and polish it up until it’s something that the entire world can enjoy.”
He furrows his brow as if this is the most absurd thing anyone has ever told him. “And you think
you can do that with”—he reaches in front of me to pluck out a random book from the shelf—”The
Alpha Billionaire’s Christmas Baby?”
“I happen to like Christmas babies and Alpha billionaires,” I say with mock disdain, and he
laughs that incredible laugh once again that makes me want to curl up to his side and cuddle into his
broad chest.
“Fine, fine,” he concedes with a mock salute. “You read your thing, and I’ll read mine.”
“They really have the same purpose,” I say, tapping on another one of the books in his stack for
emphasis. When I do, my wrist brushes against his, and a frisson of awareness shoots down my arm.
How can something as simple as that make my toes curl?
I clear my throat. “Books are meant for escaping the real world. Books with happy endings allow
us to find hope, even if the real world doesn’t have it.”
My voice cracks a little on the last few words, and I clear my throat to disguise it. I am one of
those poor souls who will never get her happy ending. But I’ll live a thousand of them through the
stories I read and the ones I tell.
Sometimes, that’s as good as it gets.
The Alpha stares at me intently, blinking a few times with long dark lashes. “You’re right,” he
murmurs, taking a step closer to me. “Happy endings are important. Everyone deserves one.”
“But not everyone will get one,” I whisper, my face heating at his proximity. One step forward,
and I could be in his arms if I wanted to. “But they can through a book.” We’re only a few inches
apart now, and I know I should be worried about my pheromones breaking through the scent blocker,
but all I can do is focus on his own amazing scent, coming through more clearly now that he’s closer.
He smells like old books, comforting and full of warm memories. I’ve always loved the smell of
old books, but I’ve never met a person who smelled like them. This Alpha does, though, the scent
wrapping around me like an embrace from an old friend, making my throat burn with longing for
something I can never have.
His hand suddenly thrusts out, and I jump, startled by the swift movement. “Are you okay?” he
asks, cupping his palm under my elbow to steady me on my feet. “You were swaying a little on your
feet there.”
“I was…?” Oh no. My body is reacting to him. My instincts are trying to say, Alpha, Alpha,
Alpha. Mine, mine, mine. When I really need to be thinking home, home, home. My knees wobble,
and my palms are clammy, even when I wipe them on my jeans. My core heats with desire, though I
haven’t started producing slick yet. I can’t, or everything I worked for will be destroyed.
“I haven’t eaten much today,” I lie easily, stepping back from him so sharply that I drop the book I
was going to buy. It falls to the floor, the pages crumpling against the carpet. His head whips from the
book to me again, a baffled look on his face.
“I better get home and get that taken care of. Low blood sugar and all that.” I bend to snatch up the
book and hastily shelve it properly, not wanting to give Caroline more work on my account. “Excuse
me,” I duck past him, rushing out past Caroline and her customers, shouting a hasty later, girl! on my
way out the door. I push my way outside, not looking back at the handsome Alpha as I flee.
I need to get back home to take another shower to cover up my pheromones with another hot
shower and lots of scent blocker. My body is still adjusting to the new dosage of heat suppressant,
and going to the bookstore was a risk I shouldn’t have taken. The only place I should be is locked up
in my apartment, away from anyone else. Away from any Alphas. Away from the real world and any
chance at those happy endings that only exist in my books.
THREE
—
RILEY
I FINALLY STOP LOOKING behind me for the handsome Alpha when I’m just a block away
from home. The scent-blocking soap must be working its hardest because I’m not being followed by
him or any Alpha, for that matter. Getting away from him was almost too easy, and my hackles are
raised in suspicion. Usually, an Alpha will pursue anyone who pulls away from them like I did,
especially if they carry an Omega scent. But this book-loving Alpha was different. He was kind,
gentle even. My natural instincts weren’t the only thing drawing me to him. He was genuinely
interesting, and if things were different…
They aren’t different.
As I walk down the sidewalk, hands in my pockets to ward off the chilly wind, I see a familiar
car drive past—Kennedy’s little yellow coupe, complete with that ridiculous surfboard strapped on
top. I don’t know why he keeps it up there. We don’t even live near that close to the ocean, for
goodness’ sake. The closest beach is two hours away. But that’s Kennedy for you. He marches to the
beat of his own drum, which is weird enough that he’s hardly ever suspected for his other activities.
If we were normal friends, two Betas without a care in the world, I might have waved at him as
he drove by, but it isn’t worth exposing our connection to each other.
I stop short at the blare of a siren, catching the spread of blue and red light splaying over the
buildings across the street. Three police cruisers come barreling onto the main road, tires squealing
as their drivers overcorrect on the tight turn. The vehicles’ sirens wail like banshees and I can only
watch, dumbstruck, as they barricade themselves around Kennedy’s car, preventing him from going
any farther down the road. My mouth drops in horror, and fear freezes my feet right where I stand,
when I should be running into my building to hide away.
Oh god.
Kennedy is getting arrested, right in front of me, and there is nothing I can do to help him. Hot
tears well in my eyes, and I can’t seem to make my feet move more than an inch, frozen in shock as the
officers step out of their vehicles and other pedestrians stop to watch—or scurry along to get out of
the way.
“Out of the vehicle!” one of the officers belts through his megaphone, feedback echoing off of the
tall buildings around us until I feel like I’m in a tornado of static. “Put your hands up and drop your
weapons!”
Weapons? What weapons? I’ve never seen Kennedy with a gun. He is much more the “peace,
love, and weed” type. But if these officers are actually telling him to drop whatever weapons they
think he has, maybe he’s in more trouble than I thought.
I cover my mouth to muffle a scream as Kennedy finally emerges from his coupe, lanky arms
raised high in the air, his posture stiff. He says nothing, but I can’t tell his expression from here on the
sidewalk. There is no weapon in his hand, just as predicted. Nor is there the bulge of a pistol or
hidden gun anywhere in his tight jeans. Everything about this excessive force is all wrong, and I can’t
figure out why the cops were called out in such force.
I startle again as additional cars, all unmarked sedans, come roaring down the road from behind
me, blocking off Kennedy’s exit from the rear of his vehicle. Half a dozen hop out of the cars like
clowns from a circus wagon and point their guns at Kennedy, shouting loud, cold threats that blend
together until I can’t tell what they are saying. The cacophony of yelling men makes my pulse soar.
Why are they using weapons on Kennedy? Wouldn’t this just be a drug possession charge? He’s not a
murderer, at least I don’t think he is. They shouldn’t be using this kind of force. None of it makes any
sense.
Unless they’re looking for something other than just Kennedy’s drugs. Unless they’re looking for
someone other than Kennedy.
Terror shoots through my bloodstream like icy needles. What if the cops are rounding up the
Omegas that Kennedy has helped hide over the years? What if someone saw us at the café and tipped
off the police? That could be the only reason to use such a dramatic force against a simple drug
dealer. This is an attack against Omegas and those that stand up for their rights.
My feet unfreeze. I need to get out of here. Now.
I stumble backward, and my back hits a lamppost with a loud clang. The sound cracks across the
air like a gunshot, and one of the policemen pivots in place, his gun pointed in my direction, and
every instinct I have tells me to run away as far as I can.
So, I do. I run like all the demons in hell are chasing me, away from my apartment building and
back toward the street where the bookshop sits. But I’m not a good runner, and I never have been,
even when I was healthier as a child. I’m too skinny and weak, and my body doesn’t know which side
is right side up with all the imbalanced hormones rushing through my blood and muddling my senses.
After only a block and a half, my lungs are raspy and on fire, and my legs are shaking so badly that I
can barely put one foot in front of the other without tripping. The drumbeat of footsteps behind me
announces my pursuer’s arrival, and I slow to a surrendering stop. This is it. The end.
When I turn to face the cops, they have their weapons pointed right at me, tasers, not pistols,
which means they know exactly who, and what, they were chasing. Neither man is winded from the
chase, but I can barely gulp air into my lungs fast enough to keep from fainting.
“Hands in the air!” the taller man, a blond, orders, his voice harsh and biting. I let out a shriek
when he thrusts the taser toward me. ”I said hands in the air!”
I try to raise my hands toward the sky, but I’m shaking so badly that it hurts to lift my weakened
limbs. A single tear rolls down my cheek, but whether it is caused by fear or the cold wind in my
eyes, I’m not sure. I meet the second cop’s eye, and as our gazes connect, his nostrils widen. As he
inhales, his pupils grow big and dark. He’s an Alpha, and unlike the one in the bookstore, this one can
smell my scent like a shark with blood.
“Omega,” he growls, taking a menacing step forward, hand outstretched like a claw. He grabs the
front of my T-shirt, and a seam on my shoulder tears. He pulls me up against his wide chest, leaning
down to run his nose against my neck, scenting me and rubbing his own scent along my skin. I haven’t
been touched by an Alpha in years, and when I feel the air from his breath against my jugular, I break
completely.
“Please,” I whisper. My voice doesn’t sound like my own—it is too young, too small, too
frightened. “Please.” I don’t know what I am begging for. Mercy? Forgiveness? Death? I want all of it
and none of it.
“Please, what, little Omega?” snarls the cop, his fingernails digging into my skin. He looks nearly
close to rut already, his eyes wide and wild, and his cock hard in his uniform pants. I am programmed
to respond to any Alpha, but I don’t want this. I don’t want this disgusting man who would rather hurt
me and abuse his power than show me any kindness.
“Please let me go,” I say, willing my voice to go louder. He throws back his head and laughs,
shooting a glance at his partner. The blond cop looks uncomfortable, as he should be. He is a Beta,
oblivious to the thrall that Omegas and Alphas create around each other.
“Whitten,” he says carefully. “Let go of the girl. We need to take her in.”
Whitten snorts through his nose, a cruel, dismissive sound. I check his pupils again to find them
dark as night, his irises barely visible. I’m in so much trouble. If someone doesn’t stop this and soon,
this Alpha will bundle me off to his own Pack, and I’ll be doomed to live out my life as his, loveless
and lonely, only meant to be used for what my body can provide. Sex, and babies, and ecstasy,
pleasure that won’t necessarily be two-sided.
I’ve spent the past years trying to save myself from the fate I am destined to find. I’ve run from
family, from friends, from my childhood home, just to find safety from those who would use me. But
for the first time in a long time, I can’t save myself. I close my eyes and pray for a miracle. A hero.
I’m so tired of having to be my own.
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