What Doesn't Kill Us Makes Us: Who We Become After Tragedy and Trauma

Six people are grouped together in this book that are diverse and yet, they all have faced an intense breaking point in their lives. Each person had to search for a new awakening and the findings were approached in a scholarly manner.

Sophie Papp is from Victoria, British Columbia. She was riding in a car when her cousin who was driving lost control. Sophie was rushed to the hospital with a serious brain injury. When she regained her consciousness, this quiet easy-going young girl was now talkative with a higher degree of intelligence.

Valerie Piro from NYC was also in a car accident in 2008. The doctors spent six hours rebuilding her 7th cervical vertebra with metal plates and screws. She lost the ability to feel below her sternum and said it felt like she touched a body that wasn’t hers.

Gina Applebee from Charleston, SC was born as a twin with her sister Andrea. During the delivery in 1985, there were problems and Gina couldn’t breathe. She was literally fighting for her life. She ended up with a rare genetic disorder that caused her retinal cells to gradually deteriorate.

Jason Dixon graduated in 1997 from High School in Central Florida. He enjoyed the life of parties and met a girl from Pittsburgh. He decided to move there to be with her. He packed his belongings and some pain pills which were used by a relative that had died. It was his intention to sell them. However, he started taking the OxyContin. Next was Heroin and a run of bad decisions to pay for his drug addiction which sent him to prison.

Sean Taylor was from Aurora, CO. He was part of a gang and as a young teenager, his gun went off and the bullet went inside someone’s home and killed a young boy. He turned himself in and was sent to prison.

JR Vigil, born in 1980, was in a car accident in Guam. He had a traumatic brain injury with 42 days in ICU. Both legs had to be amputated while he was in a coma.

The author also wrote about his diagnosis with chronic fatigue syndrome. He had been an English professor at a local college in NY. He questioned how an illness, serious injury or catastrophe can change a person’s life and identity. The reader is challenged to look deep into the souls of these individuals with some quotes from Nietzsche and other well-known philosophers. The six interviewed had extreme cases of pain and it’s terrifying to think of what they endured.

It was clear that the author had piles of information in his head and could have easily written twice as much. There was an incredible amount of research done to create this book with a list of references at the end. It must have been an extensive process initially to eliminate all but six people. With each chapter, he wrote about the changes that happened in their lives – gradually over time -- which made it suspenseful.

I was impressed how he was able to convey such a detailed description of the places, feelings and thoughts of the individual profiles. His writing transports the reader to a place that makes you feel their pain with images that are strongly planted in the words. It's not a quick read as it takes some time to digest all he has to say. While there are parts that are lengthy, the material is awe-inspiring and thought provoking. This book is one that teaches about the human soul. As one of the participants said, “we love finding meaning” in life.

My thanks to Mike Mariani, Ballantine Books and NetGalley for allowing me to read this advanced copy with an expected release date of August 30, 2022.