It’s a sensitive conversation, but it’s time we talk about what many female teachers face and few dare to mention. Many young female teachers who are joining schools through TeacherFirst have started asking me a question that sounds simple but carries a lot of weight: “How is the school culture?” At first, I thought they meant leadership or workload. But that’s not what they’re asking. They’re asking if they’ll feel "safe". And strangely not from other male staff members, but from male students in senior grades. Well-spoken, confident boys, often from affluent families, who cross boundaries not with touch, but with tone. The lingering stare. The double-meaning joke. The “ma’am, you’re so cool” said in a way that doesn’t feel like a compliment at all. It’s not loud enough to punish, but sharp enough to wound. And when teachers speak about it, they’re told- “They’re just teenagers. Ignore it.” That’s exactly the problem. When entitlement goes unchecked, disrespect becomes culture. Every time a teacher stays silent, it’s not because she lacks courage, it’s because she knows the system won’t stand with her. If a teacher has to shrink herself to feel safe in her own classroom, we’ve already failed as educators. To every female teacher reading this, I know speaking up isn’t easy. But when you do, you’re not just protecting yourself, you’re protecting the ones who will walk this corridor after you. Courage is contagious. Start the chain. Speak up.
This isn’t a school level issue - it happens at every level - UG PG and even Doctoral level. The issue is systemic and a social one . We let our boys get away with such an attitude- it’s the mothers and sisters that need to reform . The same sisters face problems when they become teachers . Women have to stand up to such attitudes and behavior in every role they play.
We’ve all been there. The way to face it is head on. Easier if we have a mixed class. Discussion on attraction, adolescence, infatuation, sexual feelings and hormones are a must as students grow into teenagers amdcyoung adults. They not only listen intently, they even question sombrely. You are establishing the line, the maturity, the naturalness, the dangers they are confused with. You are talking of gender respect. Of why it is not wrong to feel what they feel, but wrong to act impulsively on those feelings. On empathy of not hurting others. On scarring. Of what it means to be real men. It works like magic. Some will crush on you. But they can now see it for what it is without shame, guilt or sleaze. They know it will happen many times again until they find someone they get to know, value, care about, want to protect not exploit, and to respect. To know it could be love. It’s a journey.
Thank god someone has raised this for even as far as in 2000 when I was working in schools I faced this. One is so embarrassed and you just cannot do anything when a rich tall lad says, "Ma'am can we please go to page 69" with that tell tale glint in his eyes. In affluent schools children are clients and teachers are expenses.
The media, regular jokes accentuate it, showing kids with "crush" on the teacher. I remember old school experienced teachers- they had the advantage of age but they also had sharp strict boundary on being the authority in the room and not someone cool to hang-out with. I knew many young teachers when I was in school who dressed very professionally, borderline boring- esp the ones teaching senior classes. I myself taught college kids as fourth year engineering student for GRE and found the 2nd year boys sniggering assuming I walked in as a pretty face. I very quickly proved credibility, showed they needed to learn and there was a reason I was "Ma'am" not "cool senior". Yes it's intimidating but there is also a cultural line, a gender dynamic. Like they taught "Bhabhi Ma, Samaan- meaning sister-in-law is like a mother" in joint families esp when many younger unmarried BILs would be at home, a teacher is - Guru. The Acharya Devo Bhava was taught for a reason- one simply cannot view a person in that position in any other way. Unfortunately the subtlety is lost especially when we try to make it more cool and modern with teachers being fun to hang out with.
It’s a similar situation in Government schools as well and is a reflection of the sad state of society. . It’s a reflection of mental health of the younger generation which is not being engaged in critical reflection on their values and personality. 🥲
Excellent write-up on a sensitive, much-needed topic. These youngsters are the future of our nation. If this isn't nipped in the bud, one can only imagine the horrific consequences and the cascade effect on the people they deal with both personally and professionally for the rest of their lives.
It is the responsibility of the school leader to ensure a safe and respectful teaching-learning environment for everyone, including the staff. I have personally taken firm measures to address and reprimand inappropriate behaviour by male students to uphold the dignity of my staff. I strongly believe that every leader must take a stand to protect and support their team in such situations.
Every school should cultivate and nurture a few well meaning students in each senior class to champion respectful behavior towards lady teachers through persuasion and counseling. Peer pressure can be an effective tool in handling this menace.
Oh wow! thanks for highlighting this, Pradeep Sharma! Never thought about this as a possible stress point for younger female teachers. The zero tolerance to harassment must also apply to students!
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2wThis is such an important area of concern, Pradeep. Our schools have to be safe for our teachers-free from any such threat. This is not negotiable.