In 2024, Do Only What Is Essential - TO YOU

Today, I look back at what I was like only a few short years ago - trying to be all things to all people.

My default answer to every request, both personal and professional was - YES. "Yes, of course I will do it." Why? Because deep down, I wanted to be liked. I also had something to prove to myself - that I was capable of doing a lot of things.

And, after all, in this "disturbed" society of ours, getting a lot of "stuff" done is a badge of success. It doesn't matter if it makes us sick. We are led to believe that "doing" and then "doing more" is what it's all about, despite the stress this puts upon us.

Eventually, over time - I was doing many things, that - at the end of the day - didn't really matter. I was carrying out the agendas of other people. You're likely doing too much of that as well. What about YOUR agenda? Think about it.

In these times, there is not only information overload. But also an overload of other people's opinions. Opinions on what you should and should not be doing - or could be doing. Have you noticed that everyone has something to say about you and your plans?

We not only need to make decisions based upon available information - but our brains are also hit with "views" "opinions" and "critisicm" from friends, family, co-workers, bosses, clients and even complete strangers on social media. Many of whom would love you to follow their pathway, and if you choose not to do so, you're perceived as weak or unco-operative. How dare you want to do what you want to do?

Your agenda has been hijacked. Somewhere along the line - your desires, hopes and dreams have been lost. In fact - you haven't even had the time to figure out what those hopes and dreams should be.

So it was with me. I became stuck. And I surrendered. I simply gave up trying to determine what it is that I wanted. It was just so much easier to sit back and let others make their demands of me and I would obediently carry them out. Much like a mindless machine.

In this new year, it's important for us to stop the insanity. To take the time and figure out what projects and what relationships are the most dear to our heart. And to make a commitment to focus on those. And only those.

This is going to mean uttering a tiny word that we've been reluctant to speak in the past. That word is NO.

We needn't be mean about it. We can simply say politely: "I'd love to do those things for you, but I am very focussed right now on some priorities that are very meaningful to me."

End of story.

Another thing we must do is re-learn how to make proper decisions. Today, many of us cannot make a decision. Our minds are way too distracted and easily wander off. If Aunt Molly or Uncle Joe says we shouldn't do something, we immediately believe them and drop our plan to do something else. Should I do this or should I do that? Since we're not really sure, we attempt to do everything. Everything! Everything, and therefore: nothing.

But the result of becoming a person who removes all of the "noise" and chooses to devote her or his life to one, or a small number of, projects that have meaning - is a much happier, focussed life.

How shall we determine what is important? Look into your heart. What is it telling you? Is the thing you are trying to decide upon really part of someone else's agenda? Consider the source. What does that person really want? And have you bought into silly societal norms?

If it doesn't conform to your values and if it's not meaningful to you - then maybe you should not be doing it. And it doesn't matter who is doing the asking.

Will you join me in doing what is essential? And remove what I call all the "noise"?

It's your life. You've got just one. And you'll be damned if you're going to spend it on other people's agendas, killing yourself for things that mean little or nothing to you.