Top 5 Lessons my 1-year-old daughter taught me in 2020

As we turn the last page in the final chapter in 2020, I wanted to contribute to the LinkedIn community. I'd like to share what 2020 has taught me and also tie in a few nuggets from the business school journey of the last three years at the University of Kansas which also marks the end of this decade. My KU Organizational behavior Professor taught me the practice of Reflective discernment. Before you read someone else's biography and self-help books take time to observe and reflect on what is life trying to teach you about your own life. So here is an attempt to reflect, unpack a few experiences, and I would be content if this helps even a single person who takes time to read this.

Working full-time and pursuing a degree can be challenging and stressful. Even though the decision to pursue an MBA was a long-term commitment, I enjoy learning, so I wanted to take up this pursuit as a challenge, as I knew it was well worth the investment of my time and effort. Given my motivation to do well, I thought I was well prepared, but little did I realize that even the school of life had lessons in store for me at the least expected time and at its own inevitable time.

I embarked on the first year of my school with an ACL knee surgery and a long recovery process in 2018-19. The second-year was the most challenging with losing my Father in India in 2019 while I was roughly 10,000 miles away working here in the US. I am thankful I could catch the same day flight to be with my family at the funeral. Sometimes I question myself if I were in close proximity would I have been able to save him from the heart attack. The third year of becoming a first-time Father in 2020 was an amazing experience with so many lessons including yes you can actually get by without much sleep. Somedays the three-year journey felt as if I was on a roller-coaster ride in a sleepless dream with little time to process what was going on. Each year there were times I questioned myself if I made the right decision to go to school while I was working with all that life was throwing at me. There were times when taking a break from school seemed like the right thing to do but when I start pursuing a goal I find it hard to decouple. Moreover what I was learning in school was helping me professionally in my work making me more self-aware, productive, stirring up new ideas, and helping with my performance.

Now when I look back I am thankful for all these experiences and I wouldn't give up this journey. I can also say "All is well that ends well" as I have successfully completed the MBA program at KU with Honors and now I learn some of the best lessons from my (soon-to-graduate to) 1-year old daughter by spending quality time with her. Below are the five lessons I am going to take with me into 2021 and wanted to share them as they may benefit one's personal and professional life as well.

1. Sense of wonder:  As I watch my daughter play with her toys for hours together I notice the sense of wonder, joy, and newness in everything that she engages with. I've realized this sense of wonder is the kernel of our joy and happiness and yet, we often let it fade away as we grow old. Especially in difficult times such as this year (for many with the impact of COVID), wonder is essential to nurture our passion and maintain our sanity as it helps us live in the present moment. As adults we get used to everything around us, can fall into the trap of thinking that we know it all, take things for granted and more than likely lose the fresh perspective on any subject as we shut the door on new ideas and perspectives. This reminds me of another important lesson in the course of Strategic Org design and Change management: "Perspective taking, a key attribute of a Senior leader". This can also be instrumental in helping us make quality decisions, unleash our creativity, and make us aware of the blind spots.
2. We are more resilient than we think we are: We try to be vigilant at home but I've seen my daughter try to walk and fall, roll and fall, jump and fall and yet be completely fine. It amazes me how resilient our kids can be. And as adults, we sometimes forget that we are just a grown-up version and how resilient we can be as fully developed intelligent humans. Suffering is inevitable but thankfully suffering is impermanent and so is happiness. Suffering is necessary as it keeps us humble and compassionate. Most of us dislike talking about suffering as we feel like we can't do anything about it. Especially if it something that is not in our control. But one thing we can control is how we respond to it. I continue to learn that when we embrace suffering we realize our true inner strength - our resilience. Being compassionate can also lead to self-compassion which can help us overcome self-criticism that will help unleash our creative expression.
3. Create the right environment: It's amazing how kids can thrive if we create a routine and the right environment. Change the environment and you can see the impact it has on their sleep and your sleep. This also reminds me of the importance of creating the right environments when managing teams and people. The concepts of "Interactional framework", "Situational Leadership" in my Leadership and team-building courses were fantastic.
4. Clean up the mess before the smell takes over: Just before my daughter was born one of my classmates who is also my client gave me a piece of great advice to cherish the first few years with my daughter. He also pointed out changing diapers is something I may not look forward to, but when I look back it's a bonding time with the child that will be etched in my memory forever. Changing the diapers reminded me of the lesson of eliminating any barriers to the goal you want to pursue. As some people say nip it in the bud. It may sound simple but is an important step that we tend to ignore or forget that may come back haunting.
5. Dream on, Never Stop trying: It may sound cruel but sometimes I laugh when my child tries her hand at something she fails but keeps trying the same thing over and over. But yet again I am amazed at this quality of persistence that the kids have. And as we grow up we often forget that it takes several times of trying something before we get something right. Some of you heard about the 10,000-hour rule idea coined by Malcolm Gladwell in his book Outliers. At the same time, it is essential that we learn from our mistakes and calibrate, change our approach from time to time. As the quote goes "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results".

If you've made it this far thank you for reading my post. Hope it has brought some value triggered some ideas for you. If you think reading this article can unpack all the things I learned in business school, totally not true. I'm still trying to process what I learned. As we enter 2021, I want to leave you with the parting words that a wise man once said. "Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always." Wishing you and your family all the health, happiness, and success for the new decade. Look forward to contributing more here on LinkedIn. Onward and Upward!