original broadway cast recording

Bob Boyett Roger Berlind Tim Levy Ken Davenport

Ted Hartley Stacey Mindich Jane Bergre
Broadway Across America Sharon Karmazin Carl Moellenberg
Tom Miller True Love Productions/Olympus Theatricals
Center Theatre Group

cast list
alphabetically

Present

Music and Lyrics by

Book by

Jason Robert Brown

Dan Elish and Robert Horn

Starring

Al Calderon Riley Costello Eamon Foley Caitlin Gann

Elizabeth Egan Gillies Ariana Grande Aaron Simon Gross
Malik Hammond Henry Hodges Joey La Varco Mary Claire Miskell
Delaney Moro Eric M. Nelsen Liana Ortiz Graham Phillips
Max Schneider Corey J. Snide Allie Trimm Brynn Williams
Set and Costume Designer

Lighting Designer

Sound Designer

David Farley

Brian MacDevitt

Jon Weston

Casting

Production Stage Manager

Technical Supervisor

Mark Simon, CSA

Rick Steiger

Peter Fulbright

Executive Producer

Press Representative

Associate Producers

101 Productions, Ltd.

Barlow Hartman

Shorenstein Hays Nederlander

The Araca Group

Music Director

Tom Kitt

EDDIE - Al Calderon
RICHIE - Eamon Foley
MOLLY - Caitlin Gann
LUCY - Elizabeth Egan Gillies
CHARLOTTE - Ariana Grande
ARCHIE - Aaron Simon Gross
MALCOLM - Malik Hammond
SIMON - Joey La Varco
KENDRA - Delaney Moro
BRETT - Eric M. Nelsen
EVAN - Graham Phillips
PATRICE - Allie Trimm
CASSIE - Brynn Williams

Arrangements and Orchestrations

Jason Robert Brown

understudies

Choreographed by

Christopher Gattelli
Directed by

Jeremy Sams
13 was originally commissioned and produced by
Center Theatre Group, Los Angeles,
Michael Ritchie, Artistic Director; Charles Dillingham, Managing Director
by special arrangement with Bob Boyett
Subsequently produced by Goodspeed Musicals,
Michael P. Price, Executive Producer

Riley Costello, Henry Hodges,

Mary Claire Miskell, Liana
Ortiz, Max Schneider,
Corey J. Snide

the band
TOM KITT: Piano / Musical Director
ADAM MICHAEL KAUFMAN:
Keyboard
CHRIS RAYMOND: Electric and acoustic
guitar (solos on tracks 1, 10 & 16)
ZACH PAGE: Electric and acoustic
guitar (solos on tracks 9 & 16)
LEXI BODICK: Bass
ZAC COE: Drums and percussion
CHARLIE ROSEN: Bass
(tracks 2, 3, 10, 11 &16)
MAT EISENSTEIN: Associate Conductor
JRB: Piano (track 16)
MUSIC COORDINATOR: Michael Keller
ASSISTANT MUSIC COORDINATOR:
Dan McMillan
KEYBOARD PROGRAMMING:
Randy Cohen
SUPERVISING MUSIC COPYIST:
John Blane
PRODUCTION VOCAL COACH:
Liz Caplan

track list
1. 13 / BECOMING A MAN (Phillips & Company)
2. THE LAMEST PLACE IN THE WORLD (Trimm)
3. HEY KENDRA (Calderon, Hammond, Nelsen, Gillies, Moro)
4. GET ME WHAT I NEED (Gross & Company)
5. WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A FRIEND (Trimm)
6. ALL HAIL THE BRAIN / TERMINAL ILLNESS
(Phillips, Gross, Nelsen & Company)
7. GETTING READY (Gross, Phillips, Nelsen, Gillies, Moro,
Trimm & Company)
8. ANY MINUTE (Nelsen, Moro, Trimm & Gross)
9. HERE I COME (Phillips & Company)
10. OPPORTUNITY (Gillies & Company)
11. BAD BAD NEWS (Calderon, Hammond, La Varco & Foley)
12. TELL HER (Phillips & Trimm)
13. IT CANT BE TRUE (Gillies, Gann & Company)
14. IF THATS WHAT IT IS (Gross, Trimm & Phillips)
15. A LITTLE MORE HOMEWORK (Phillips, Grande & Company)
16. BRAND NEW YOU (Williams, Grande, Gann & Company)
BONUS TRACKS

17. 13 (Single Version)

18. A LITTLE MORE HOMEWORK (Single Version)

From L to R (back row): Delaney Moro, Al Calderon, Elizabeth

Egan Gillies, Eric M. Nelsen, Malik Hammond. From L to R (front
row): Brynn Williams, Eamon Foley, Caitlin Gann, Joey La Varco,
Ariana Grande, Allie Trimm, Graham Phillips, Aaron Simon Gross

Okay, you wanna talk about turning 13? Its

a nightmare!

New Yorks Upper West Side. Two things are torturing 12-year-old Evan Goldman: His
parents upcoming divorce, and his looming, all important Bar Mitzvah, the event that
defines you, the Jewish super bowl! [13/Becoming a Man]
But the stress is really just beginning: Evans mother tells him that he has to move
away from New York City with her -- to Appleton, Indiana! A flat, brown, desolate
Midwestern town. Furthermore, Evan will have to have his Bar Mitzvah there, away from
all his friends and family, in a town where UFOs go to refuel.
All is not lost, however. Evan meets his new neighbor, Patrice, a quirky girl who seems
to be as much of an outcast in this Midwestern suburbia as he is. [The Lamest Place
in the World]
Theres only one way for Evan to survive and be popular in this world, and thats to get
the coolest kids in town to come to his party, especially the coolest of all, the football
hero of Dan Quayle Junior High, Brett Sampson. Evan listens in as Brett and his two
side-kicks, the pint-sized Malcolm and Eddie, try to figure out the perfect place that
Brett can take the beautiful head cheerleader Kendra on a date, so he can do the
tongue. [Hey Kendra] Evan makes an ingenious suggestion, Kendra agrees to go on the
date, and Brett realizes the new kid might be useful to have around.
Evan is sure that he has his new life under control -- a great new friend in Patrice and an
in with the cool kids when he suddenly has to make a terrifying decision: on his first
day at school, Brett and the others make him choose between them and the unpopular
Patrice. They wont come to his party if shell be there. Knowing his survival in this new
place is at stake, Evan rips up Patrices invite, devastating her.

Observing all of this is the manipulative, charming, take-no-prisoners outcast Archie, a

special needs boy on crutches, and Patrices closest friend. He sizes up the new kid,
and strikes a deal: he will help Evan smooth things over with Patrice if the now popular
Evan helps him get a date with Kendra, the girl of his handicapped dreams. [Get Me
What I Need]
Meanwhile, Kendra is having second thoughts, prodded by her best friend Lucy, who
explains to an oblivious Kendra the real reason Brett asked her to the movie: to do The
Tongue. Lucys real motives are not particularly generous: she has her eyes on Brett
for herself!
Archie lives up to his part of the new bargain, and tries to get Patrice to forgive Evan.
Patrice makes it clear that thats not going to happen. [What It Means To Be A
Friend]
Brett, Malcolm and Eddie corner Evan, and tell him he needs to have his mom get them
all tickets to the R-rated movie The Bloodmaster if he wants them to come to his
party. Evan tries to come up with a plan to get the tickets, and finally realizes that Archie
is his secret weapon. [All Hail The Brain/Terminal Illness] Evans scheme works: Brett
gets his date, Evan gets the credit, and Archie gets to sit next to Kendra at the movie,
thereby fulfilling Evans part of the bargain to Archie.
Evan is again sure hes got everything handled; Brett got his date and will come to his
party, Archie is under control, and even Patrice agrees to come to the movie when Evan
asks her out. [Getting Ready]
But things in the movie dont go as planned for Evan. As Brett and Kendra nervously
prepare to kiss, Archie shows up dressed to the eight and a halves, ready for his date
with Kendra. Evan ignores a scorned Patrice in his attempts to control Archie, and in one
terrifying moment, Bretts planned kiss ends up hitting the wrong target. [Any Minute]

Pandemonium ensues, and as Archie explains that Evan set up this date with Kendra
for him, Brett goes after both of them. Kendra runs out on Brett, to Lucys delight.
Furious and frustrated, Brett tells Evan that hes a dead man, and so is anyone who tries
to come to his party.

Brett runs off to put the advice into action. He exits to break up a fight between Kendra
and Lucy, and in the process tells Lucy its over and, using the words he heard Patrice
and Evan say, apologizes to Kendra. It works, and the two are back together thanks
to Evan!

Outside the movie theater, Patrice reams Evan out for being cruel and insensitive. Evan
wonders how he can fix every disaster hes created? Archie asks him how badly he
wants to, and in an empowering moment at the cinemas arcade, Evan finds his inner
strength, and vows, somehow, not to run and cower, but to take control of his life and
fix the mess he created. [Here I Come]

But Lucy will have none of it, and decides to exact revenge, one of her favorite pastimes.
She starts the gossip machine running at full steam, knowing it will get back to Brett.
She then arranges a meeting for Kendra to thank Evan for getting her and Brett back
together. [It Cant Be True]

The stage suddenly explodes with a high-energy Midwestern junior high school football
game. Brett, the star quarterback, is clearly still smitten with Kendra, and she with him.
Kendra begs Lucy to go talk to Brett for her, and ask forgiveness. Lucy goes to Brett
and makes a rather different decision, taking advantage of the opportunity to steal Brett
for herself. [Opportunity]
Meanwhile, as Evan shows Archie his renewed confidence, determined to come up with
the perfect plan to rectify ALL his mistakes and get Brett to his party, Bretts boys
Malcolm and Eddie are distraught. Brett, now Lucys man, has been whipped! As Eddie
says If I live to be twenty, Ill never understand women. [Bad Bad News]

Just as Kendra is giving Evan an innocent thank you hug, Brett and the other kids arrive,
and Brett lashes out at Kendra. Evan, finally realizing what he should have known from
the beginning, stands up to Brett and publicly calls him out as a bully and a jerk, just in
time for Archie and Patrice to see him in his glory. It doesnt end well. Brett leaves with
his new girlfriend, Lucy.
Exhausted, depressed and disillusioned, Evan decides to call off his Bar Mitzvah. But
Archie and Patrice wont give up on him. Life may not turn out the way you want it to,
they say, but if youve got the right friends, it might turn out just fine. [If Thats What
it Is]

Evan overhears this, and comes up with the perfect plan. He tells Malcolm and Eddie
he can help Brett get Kendra back and get rid of Lucy, thereby restoring harmony and
tongue back into their lives. Archie, fearful for his friends well-being, begs Patrice to go
help Evan. She reluctantly does.

Evan realizes that the new family he was trying to create in this new town was right in
front of him all the time. Evans Bar Mitzvah isnt a disaster, after all: his new best friends
come, as does his father, who proudly sits with his mother, and for just one moment,
they are a family again. Evan realizes that his life is just beginning, and that many more
mistakes and choices will be made, but you can only look forward, and no matter what
you do, you cant go back. [A Little More Homework]

In front of Brett, Evan freezes. He doesnt know what to tell Brett. Patrice arrives just in
time and offers Brett the advice she wishes Evan would take: Just talk to her, honestly
and from your heart, and tell her youre sorry. [Tell Her]

And then, everyone celebrates. [Brand New You]

- Robert Horn

act one
13 / becom

ing a man

EVAN
Im Evan Goldman. I live at 224
West 92nd Street, in the heart
of Manhattan, and my life just
went to hell.
Picture me:
Just another cool kid in N.Y.C.,
Near the Park and the Met.
Life is sweet:
Yankees in the Bronx,
pretzels on the street
Just how good can it get?
Whod have guessed
Dad would meet
a stewardess?
Moms depressed,
And her lawyers are mean.
Now Im stressed
Life is a disaster
And Im cracking from the strain,
Going totally insane,
And Im just about to turn,
Just about to turn,
Just about to turn

KIDS
Thirteen!

EVAN
Nothing is going right!

EVAN
Everything turns around.

EVAN and KIDS

The best and the worst
And the most and the least
And the crazy and the scary
And Im standing on the edge!

KIDS
Thirteen!
EVAN
End up in stitches...
KIDS
Thirteen!
EVAN
Hide away underground!

EVAN
Twelve years old
Everything that used to
be good as gold
Starts to crumble
and crack.

EVAN
Every conversation is
another lost cause
Or a list of my flaws
And Im just about to turn,
MORE KIDS
Just about to turn,
MORE KIDS
God, Im gonna turn
ALL
Thirteen!
BOY
I want a dirt bike!

EVAN
Can I get through it?

EVAN & TWO BOYS

Pressure mounts:
Once it was a joke,
now it really counts
And theres no
turning back.

KIDS
Thirteen!

add TWO GIRLS

Life goes wrong.

EVAN
Life has changed overnight!

ONE BOY
Suddenly theyre yelling
cause your hairs too long

BOY
I want a mustache!

ONE GIRL
Or your room isnt clean.

KIDS
Thirteen!

KIDS
Thirteen!

KIDS
Thirteen!

EVAN and KIDS

Thirteen!

EVAN
How do I do it?

EVAN
Everything switches

KIDS
Thirteen!

ALL FIVE
Roll along:

KIDS
Thirteen!
GIRL
I want to kill my ma.
KIDS
Thirteen!

GIRL
I want a WonderBra!
KIDS
Thirteen!
When do I get it?
Thirteen!
All of the grown-up stuff?
Thirteen!
How will I make it?
Thirteen!
When am I old enough?
ALL
Why is the world feeling
suddenly stranger?
Why are my friends acting
totally weird?
Why do I feel like my life is
in danger?
Why do I feel like my brain
disappeared?
GIRL
How will I get through a year
of Spanish?
BOY
How can I not look dumb in
Track?
BOY
How can I gain twenty
pounds by Friday?
BOY
How can I make my voice
not crack?

Graham Phillips

ALL
I wanna fly, wanna run,
wanna drive,
Wanna get rich!
Wanna get drunk!
wanna get out!
Wanna get my braces off,
Wanna get my nose pierced,
Wanna grow my hair long,
But all I keep hearing is:
No, youre not ready!
No, its not time yet!
No, its not right now!
Wait until youre older!
No, youre not ready!
No, its not time yet!
No, its not right now!
Wait until youre older!
No, youre not ready!
No, its not time yet!
No, its not right now!
Wait until youre older!
Homework!
Laundry!
Dishes!
Courses!
Just settle down and hold
your horses!
EVAN
In the middle of this city,
In the middle of this street,
Theres the sound of
something crumbling
Rumbling underneath my
feet.

In the middle of the sidewalk

Outside PS 84,
I hear a roar
I cant ignore.
I hear,
Evan, its not your fault,
I hear,
Evan, cant you see?
I hear, Evan, do you want to
go with Mom or stay with me?
I hear, Kiddo, Im not angry.
I hear,
Buddy, you know best,
And theres the rumbling
getting louder
But theres one day in October
When the pieces all will fit,
When they have to be together
And pretend they didnt quit,
Ive got one day in October
And I know its gotta be
The perfect party!
Im becoming a man.
I dont know what a man
really means.
The rulebook grows,
But no one knows
What all the rules allow.
Im becoming a man.
No one tells all us scared
in-betweens
Just how we should
Be strong, be good,

With so much pressure now!

One day it gets better One day it makes sense.
One day Ill stop talking in
the friggin future tense.
One day in October,
Itll all be great!
And I cant wait!
I cant wait!
I cant wait!
GIRL
I cant wait to come to your
party!
ANOTHER GIRL
I cant wait to come to your
party!
TWO BOYS
I cant wait to come to your
party!
TWO KIDS
I cant wait to come to your
party!
THREE KIDS
I cant wait to come to your
party!
THREE KIDS
I cant wait to come to your
party!
ALL THE KIDS
I cant wait! I cant wait!

Cant wait,
Cant wait,
Cant wait, cant wait, cant
wait, cant wait for
Thirteen!
Something is comin!
Thirteen!
Something is goin up!
Thirteen!
Something is hummin!
Thirteen!
Somebodys growin up!
Thirteen!
Thirteen!
Thirteen!
Thirteen!
The best and the worst
And the most and the least
And the crazy and the scary
And were just about to turn
Thirteen!

the lam

e in the
est plac

world

PATRICE
Down the road, theres a
Dairy Queen.
Up the block, theres a
WalMart.
Theres a place you can
accessorize your pets.
A school, a tree, a couple of
churches,

hey kendra

And no matter how hard

anybody searches,
Thats about as thrilling as
this dumb-ass village gets.
Its the lamest place in the
world,
But it just got a little bit better,
So dont disappear.
Its the lamest place in the
world,
But Im pretty sure
Its not as lame as it was before
Now that youre here.

guide!

Forty miles to the nearest river,

Sixty miles to the airport,
When we plan our escape,
thats where were gonna
have to be.
Its a shame, its a sham,
its a terrible pity
You got dragged away from
New York City,
Its major suck for YOU,
but its amazing luck for me!

It just got a little

bit better!
Amazing
but true!
Yes, the lamest
place in the
world
Has lots
of flaws
But maybe itll
be fine because
It brought me
to you!

Its the lamest place in the

world,
But it just got a little bit better,
Im happy to say:
Its the lamest place in the
world,

And though I dont really

know you,
I can hardly wait to show you
Every fake and freak, every
fool and clown,
Since the Chippewa settled
this stupid town,
Let em laugh, they wont
keep me down
With you by my side!

EDDIE
1, 2, 3, here we go
MALCOLM and EDDIE
Hey Kendra
BRETT
Hey, Kendra.
MALCOLM and EDDIE
I been thinkin
BRETT
Ive been thinking.
MALCOLM and EDDIE
I gotta, gotta, gotta, gotta get
witchoo.
BRETT
So true.
MALCOLM and EDDIE
I wanna get all up in yo
bidness, girl.
And make you feel real fine.
BRETT
Real fine, not fake fine.
EDDIE and MALCOLM
Hey Kendra!

Youre completely exotic,

Intellectual, neurotic,
You would never have a
shot exCept you found the perfect

BRETT
Hey Kendra.

Allie Trimm

EDDIE and MALCOLM

Come closer.
BRETT
Much closer.
EDDIE and MALCOLM
I got myself a brand new
rocking horse
EDDIE and MALCOLM
Why dont you climb up
here, mama?
EDDIE
And rock it, rock it all night
long!
BRETT
Okay, stop! Yeah, not gonna
work.
EDDIE
Yeah, so gonna work. Its
double edge
MALCOLM and EDDIE
Smoooooooth
BRETT
Guys, Kendras a good girl.
I cant just hit on her like
whack-a-mole. I do that, Ill
never get the tongue!
EDDIE
Incoming! Kendra, three
oclock

1, 2, 3, get shizzy
BRETT
Kendra, theres something I
wanna ask you
LUCY
Oh God
EDDIE and MALCOLM
Hey Kendra!
BRETT
Hey Kendra.
EDDIE and MALCOLM
Ive been thinking
BRETT
Ive been thinking.

KENDRA
Malls are mini miracles.
Its perfect!

ALL THREE
Were gonna get some
popcorn and some Raisinets.

LUCY
No, it isnt.

MALCOLM
Chocolate covered.

EDDIE and MALCOLM

No, no, she cant do it.
LUCY
I said she cant go!
EDDIE and MALCOLM
Uh-uh, no way.

EDDIE and MALCOLM

Hey Kendra

EDDIE
Tell yo mama not to worry, girl.

BRETT
Hey Kendra

ALL THREE
Its gonna feel real fine.

LUCY
Cause you already
committed to do that thing!

EDDIE and MALCOLM

Dont be nervous.

KENDRA
Yay!

KENDRA
What thing?

BRETT
Trust me, baby.

LUCY
No no no no no!
You cant go to the movies
on Friday night!

LUCY
That thing!

ALL THREE
I wanna spend a little special
time with you.

KENDRA
What thing?
LUCY
That thing you said you
would do on Friday!

KENDRA
Aw

KENDRA
There is no thing!

ALL THREE
I wanna take you to a movie,
girl.

LUCY
Yes, there is, Kendra!

BRETT
Friday night.

KENDRA
Im going to the movies
Friday night with Brett!

EDDIE and MALCOLM

Down at the mall.

LUCY
No youre not! Dont
From L to R: Elizabeth Egan
Gillies, Delaney Moro,
Al Calderon, Eamon Foley

contradict me in public,
Kendra! Well talk about
this later!
KENDRA
FINE!
BRETT, MALCOLM & EDDIE
Hey Kendra
Im begging
MALCOLM
Please come to the movies
on Friday
KENDRA
Sure Ill come!
LUCY
We so majorly have to talk!
BRETT, MALCOLM & EDDIE
Oo, baby, we so goooood.
EDDIE
You gonna get all up in her
bidness, yo!

eed

hat I n
get me w

ARCHIE
Theres the cool kids
Theres the preps
And theres the skate punks
And the jocks
And then theres me.
Theres the losers
Theres the nerds
And theres the stoners
And the Goths
And then theres me.
But then theres you!
Cause youre the new kid in
the school,
Youre not defined by one
specific breed,
And so youre free to flit
from group to group, from
scene to scene,
Cause youre the conduit,
the medium, the gobetween,
Which means youre
perfectly positioned to
Get me what I need!
EVAN
Look, Archie, Im the wrong
guy for this.
ARCHIE
One date! Thats all Im
asking.

EVAN
Isnt there some nice girl on
the special needs bus?
ARCHIE
They dont like me.
Even back before the crutches,
It was clear,
I dont fit here.
So its hopeless,
I cant walk right up to
Kendra and say Hey.
Shed run away.
But look at you!
Youre making friends and
having parties
And adapting with
impressive speed!
Just twenty minutes when
were sitting so our knees
could touch
Yes, its a tiny inconvenience
but it means so much!
Cause out of all of Indiana,
you can get me what I need!
EVAN
Its impossible!
ARCHIE
And what I need is Kendra!
BOYS
Kendra! Kendra!
ARCHIE
Beautiful Kendra!

BOYS
Kendra! Kendra!
ARCHIE
Wonderful Kendra!
Make her appear!
ARCHIE & BOYS
If you want a girl,
The girl you want is
ARCHIE
Kendra!
GIRLS
Kendra! Kendra!
ARCHIE
Very hot
Kendra!
BOYS
Very hot,
very hot!
ARCHIE
Go tell Kendra
Im waiting here!
Heres the
problem:
Every minute,
every second
that I wait
Might be too late.
So lets face it:
If I ever had a
chance,
Aaron Simon Gross

o be a

friend

t
the time is now.
means
So who cares how?
what it
Just do your best,
I wont bother you again,
PATRICE
And thats a promise,
A friends not a cheap little
guaranteed!
phony creep
So you can help me out and
Or a jerk trying to make
we can both do very well,
a deal.
Or I can turn around and
A friend is a person who,
make your life a living hell!
most of all,
Its up to you, youve got a
Cares about what you feel;
choice, youve got incentive
And nothing is harder
to succeed!
Than learning a friend isnt real.
Yes, I know it sounds insane.
Jerry Lewis can explain!
A friend sends notes back
Youve got to help me, Evan,
and forth all day
And doesnt care that you
Help me, Evan,
cant spell.
Help me, Evan,
A friend knows youve got a
Help me, Evan!
crush on your teacher,
Get me what I
But a friend would never tell.
Need!
A friends outside waiting
The minute you both hear
EVAN
the bell
Ill try.
And if your heart is always
ARCHIE
breaking
I knew you would.
Cause the world is just
not fair,
When youre at your worst,
Your friends the first one there,
Giving you something to
lean on
And thats what it means to
be a friend.
A friend wont smoke when
shes in your room

Or laugh at the poems you

write.
A friend wont go and start
kissing your brother
The minute that youre out
of sight.
A friend is the person
You call sixteen times evry
night
And if your heart is always
breaking,
And you want to run and hide,
When your hope is gone,
Your friend is on your side.
If someone moves in round
the corner
And you want to show him
you care,
So you give him all your last
month of vacation
And all of the time you can
spare,
And then, on the first day of
classes,
He acts like youre not even
there,
Then he doesnt know
He doesnt know!
Hell never know what it
means to be
A friend

e brain /
all hail th
illness
terminal

could do,
Saw us through,
Saved the day!
And all I have to do is

KIDS
Brains gonna do it!
Brains gonna do it!
Friday night, the Brains
gonna do it!
Friday night, we go to the mall
And Brains gonna get us
into the movie!
Gonna go see The
Bloodmaster!
Friday night, The
Bloodmaster!
Friday night, Friday night!
Brains gonna do it!
Brains gonna do it!

Wait til Mom goes to sleep,

Then sneak the license
from the wallet in her purse,
Make a color Xerox,
laminate it,
Then put the license
back in the wallet in her purse,
Then find the dress she wore
In the picture on the license
that I copied and I laminated.
Wear the dress,
Get a wig,
Show the license,
Buy the tickets
What could go wrong?

EVAN
I have a plan.
I have a plan.
Possibly, I think I have a plan.
Itll take a lot of work,
Itll take a lot of luck,
But when it all comes through,
Theyll say:

KIDS
Bretts gonna do it!
Bretts gonna do it!
Friday night, Bretts
gonna do it!
Friday night at
The Bloodmaster,
Bretts gonna do The Tongue
with Kendra!
Friday night at the movie
at the mall!
And Brains gonna get us in!

All Hail the Brain!

He does what no mere
mortal can!
Hes the man!
Evan Goldman!
All Hail the Brain!
He did what no one else

EVAN
I have a plan!
A better plan.
Actually, an almost-perfect

plan.
It sounds absolutely nuts,
Itll take a lot of guts,
But when it all comes through,
Theyll say:
All Hail the Brain!
Give that Bar Mitzvah Boy
a hand!
Aint he grand?
Aint he great!
And all I have to do is

EVAN
I have a plan.
I have a plan
So you and Kendra can go
out on Friday night!

Cause no one says no to

a kid with a fatal disease!

I need your help, though,

so stay calm.
You need to go talk to my Mom,
And itll all come true
Because

EVAN
I know you can.

Go that day to the movie

theater,
Break into the projection room,
Steal the reels of film for
The Bloodmaster,
Take em down the hall where
theyre showing Bambi,
Switch the reels,
Leave the theater,
Tell the guys were gonna go
see Bambi!
What could go wrong?

No one says no to a boy

with a terminal illness.
Take it from me, its a
sure guarantee of success.
Listen, Im not making fun
of your terminal illness,
But you hold the secret to
getting my mom to say yes.
So talk to my mom,
and get her to buy
The tickets we need to obtain.
Brett gets his movie,
I get the credit,
And you get your date,
so who would complain?
Except for you, because
youre dying, but
No one says no to a boy
with a terminal illness!
Who could refuse when you
shuffle your shoes
and say Please!
Use all the tricks that you
learned in your cradle:
You dont need to lay it on
thick with a ladle,

ARCHIE
Mrs. Goldman, I hate to
bother you but I was strolling
through the neighborhood..

BRETT
Hey, Brain, did you set up my
date for Friday?
EVAN
Date?
BRETT
With Kendra!
EVAN
Date! Date!
Archie, I have major news.

ARCHIE
I can do this!

La la la la la la la la la la la
la la la

EVAN
La la la la la la la la la la la
la la
ARCHIE
Which wouldnt be so bad
if it werent my birthday on
Friday, but the insurance
didnt cover
EVAN
La la la la la la la la la la la
la la la
ARCHIE
I can always pay you for
the tickets if I dont get my
medicine next month
EVAN
La la la la la la la la la la la

la la!
ARCHIE
And you know, Ive always
felt a kinship with the Jewish
people.
EVAN
Out of the blue,
a thought comes to you
Like sun coming out from
the rain.
And after the stress,
my mother says
ARCHIE
Yes!
EVAN
Yes!
EVAN & ARCHIE
Were all set for Friday,
so who could complain?
ARCHIE
Except for you, because
youre Jewish and you
always complain.
EVAN
Its true, but
EVAN & ARCHIE
No one says no to a boy
with a terminal illness!
Ask for a day at the mall or
a trip to Belize!

Nothings too hard and no

quest unendurable
Long as youre sure youre
completely incurable!
No one says no to a boy
With a fatal disease!
BRETT
All Hail The Brain!
KIDS
All Hail the Brain!
BRETT
I never thought hed take
the bait!
This is great!
Evan Goldman!
KIDS
Evan Goldman!
All Hail the Brain!
EVAN
I did what no one else
could do!
Tell me, who
Could complain?

KIDS
All Hail the Brain!

ARCHIE
Gotta shave my beard

ALL
All Hail the Brain!

EVAN
And if it goes as planned,
Patrice will understand
Some prices are worth
paying when your dreams
come true

y
getting read
ARCHIE
Only got one shot
Better get it right.
Im getting ready.
Gotta look real hot
When its Friday night.
Im getting ready!
Im getting ready today.
Im getting ready to say
Im not that weird geek you
think I must be.
Im getting ready to move.
Im getting ready to prove
Kendra just needs a sex god
like me.

BRETT
All Hail the Brain!

EVAN
On Friday night, Ill be the
hometown hero.

KIDS
All Hail the Brain!

ARCHIE
Gotta cut my nails

EVAN
All Hail the Brain!

EVAN
If this goes right,
then Ill be free and clear.

ARCHIE
Im getting ready for her!
Im getting ready, yes, sir!
Ready for passion,
delight and romance!
ARCHIE & EVAN
Im getting ready to go!
Im getting ready, and
knowing
I may only get this one
chance
BRETT
There, in the dark of the
Appleton Cinema,
Free from the publics prying
eyes,
There, with my girl in the
chair beside me,
I can reveal my Big Surprise!
There, while the rest of the
crowds immersed in
All of the blood vessels
onscreen burstin,
Kendra will get to be the
first in
Line to realize:

Here comes the Tongue!

EDDIE and MALCOLM
Here it comes, here it
comes!
BRETT
Here comes the Tongue!
EDDIE and MALCOLM
Here it comes, here it
comes!
BRETT
Here comes the
BRETT, EDDIE and
MALCOLM
Tolu balu balu balu balu balu
balu balu balu balu balu balu
balu balu balu bala!
KENDRA
Okay, so just go through this
with me one more time.
LUCY
Okay.
KENDRA
If he does it and I let him
LUCY
Youre a slut.
KENDRA
Right.
And if he wants to,
but I stop him

LUCY
Youre a tease.
KENDRA
God.
And if I let him and I like it
LUCY
Youre a skank.
KENDRA
Wow.
LUCY
But he could also get his
tongue stuck down your
throat,Or try to kiss so hard,
he chips one of your teeth,
Or theres a million other
ways that it could all go
wrong.
It doesnt matter if the urge
to kiss him back is strong,
Youve got to hold that boy
at bay,
Step back from the edge
and say:
Im a good girl, I dont do that.
Im a nice girl, put that away.
Im a good girl, keep your
hands off.
If you tell him that, then
youll be okay.
KENDRA
What if its just, like, this
much?

LUCY
When you got that solo in
choir, its cause I told you
what to sing.
When you got the lead in
the fall school play, its
cause I coached you all last
spring.
When you got to be the
head of the cheerleading
squad, its cause i taught
you everything.
Think of all the things i
should have had you got
instead
Because you did just what
I said!
Youre a good girl!
KENDRA
Im a good girl!
LUCY
You dont do that!
KENDRA
But hes soooo cute.
LUCY
Youre a good girl!
KENDRA
Listen, lucy
LUCY
Dont question me!

KENDRA
But I could be his girlfriend!

ARCHIE
Im getting ready, its true!

LUCY
Youre a good girl!

ARCHIE & EVAN

Im getting ready to do
Something that makes her/
them
Accept me at last!

KENDRA
Im a good girl
BOTH
You/I dont do that!
EVAN
Koh-amar...
KENDRA & LUCY
I could be his girlfriend!
EVAN
Hael Adoshem...
LUCY
If I could get her out of the
way...
EVAN
Bore hashamayim...
KENDRA
But now I just dont know
what to say...
EVAN
Venotayhem!
KENDRA, LUCY & PATRICE
Ive got to get ready for him!

ARCHIE, EVAN, PATRICE,

LUCY, KENDRA, MALCOLM
& EDDIE
Im getting ready, all right!
Nothing can stop me tonight!
BRETT
Tolu balu balu balu balu balu
balu balu balu balu balu balu
balu balu balu bala!
ALL
Im getting ready!
Ready!
Ready!
Now!

any minute
BRETT
Someone got his eyelids
torn off.
And Im sitting here,
And I should be doing
something.
That guy got an axe in his
throat

And shes sitting there,

And I dont know why Im
waiting,
But oh, any minute,
Ill be getting closer.
Ill be where I want to be
Any minute.
KENDRA
Someone got his skull
chopped in half,
And hes sitting there,
And maybe he doesnt
want me.
Maybe it was something
I said.
Or maybe my breath.
Why did I eat those porkrinds?
Cause oh, any minute
He could turn and kiss me.
And well be where we
ought to be
Any minute

KENDRA
He wants to be with Lucy.

BRETT
If I want it

And after the tongue,

There will be groping!

BRETT
This was such a stupid idea.

KENDRA
If I want it

ARCHIE
Okay.

KENDRA
And shes right.

BOTH
If I close my eyes!

BRETT
If I could just

BRETT
Any minute

BRETT & ARCHIE

And so, watch out, Kendra!
Now, watch out, women!
Now! Now! Now!

KENDRA
Im a good girl

KENDRA
Any minute

BRETT
Turn my head slightly
sideways

BRETT
Any moment

BRETT
She just set his penis on fire.

PATRICE
And oh, any minute,
Hell do something for me.
Did he just invite me
So he could ignore me?
He wont even know Im
gone

KENDRA
This is weird.

BRETT
Any minute!

BRETT
What do I do?

KENDRA
Any minute

KENDRA
Am I fat?

BRETT
Any moment

BRETT
This is so not romantic.

KENDRA
Any moment

KENDRA
Any moment
BOTH
Any time!
BRETT
No more time to
sit on my butt.
Time to move in.
Time to get
started.
ARCHIE
This is it,
Archie.
BRETT
After all,
tonight is the tongue.

From L to R: Elizabeth Egan Gillies, Eric M. Nelsen, Delaney Moro

act two

here I come

Or count me out,
Just look me in the eye

KIDS
Yes, hes comin up!

EVAN
Nothings done or set,
There are options to
consider.
I admit I didnt make it work
tonight.
Im not finished yet.
They are not gonna call me
a quitter,
Cause Im gonna try again
with all my might
Until I can show the people
In this town
That I can get it right!

So here I come!
Its a little late but now Im
in control, yeah!
Here I come!
Better check me out cause
this is how I roll, whoa!
Im gonna find out what
theyve got and I will get
me some,
Now here I come!

EVAN
And I am not about to pack
my bags and leave,

So here I come!
I got a million other tricks
still up my sleeve, yeah.
Here I come!
And I am not about to pack
my bags and leave, no no no.
I didnt push this hard to go
back where I started from!
Here I come!You can break
me down,
You can say I just dont get it,
You can make me kiss the
life I knew goodbye.
You can kick me out,
You can say Im gonna
regret it,
But you never get to tell me
I cant try!
Before you can put me off

You think I wont get my

wishes;
Youve never known
somebody this ambitious.
Take a breath, count to ten,
I blew it once but I wont
again:
Im beginning to see,
Im beginning to learn,
Im becoming a man
And here I come!
So here I come!
Ive got a million other tricks
still up my sleeve!
KIDS
Look out, cause hes comin
on fast!
EVAN
Here I come!

KIDS
No no no no no!
EVAN
Im gonna fight until I get
my share!
Im gonna win this battle
fair and square!
I didnt push this hard to
end up where I started from!
KIDS
Hes comin up right!
Better watch out!
Hes comin! Comin oh!
EVAN
So here I come!

opportunity
LUCY
My best friend ran out on
her boyfriend.
And her boyfriends the boy
that I wanna be with.
My best friends in a bad
situation.
When she cries and she
tries to repair her romance,
Is it nasty if I notice that I
just got a chance?
If I whisper pretty please
a little,
Maybe I can seize a little
O-P-P opportunity, O-P-P
opportunity.
CHEERLEADERS
O-P-P, opportunity!
O-P-P!
LUCY
Opportunity!
CHEERLEADERS
Whoa-oh! Whoa-oh-oh!
Whoa-oh! Whoa-oh-oh!
LUCY
What kind of glam-slam girl
would I be
If I didnt take advantage of
an opportunity!

KENDRA
Here we go!
CHEERLEADERS
The Quayle Quails rock and
the Quayle Quails kill!
The Thunderhawks wont
but the Quayle Quails will!
The Quayle Quails squawk
and the Quayle Quails cluck!
The Quayle Quails win cause
the Thunderhawks suck!
LUCY
I could be Bretts brand-new
girlfriend.
KENDRA
Oh, Lucy, look at Brett.
LUCY
I could show him a lot of
new tricks.
KENDRA
He looks like a rainbow full
of sad.
LUCY
Kendra still wants to be
Bretts girlfriend.

Or do I take the reward

that I really wanna take?
No matter how I contemplate it,
This is such a complicated
CHEERLEADERS
O-P-P!
LUCY
Opportunity!
CHEERLEADERS
O-P-P!
LUCY
Opportunity!
CHEERLEADERS
Hey-oh!
O-P-P, opportunity!
O-P-P!
LUCY
Opportunity!
CHEERLEADERS
Whoa-oh! Whoa-oh-oh!
Whoa-oh! Whoa-oh-oh!

KENDRA
Lucy, go apologize to him for me!

LUCY
How do I choose what
to say, what to see
When presented with a
candy-coated opportunity?

LUCY
But do I cut her a break
cause she made a mistake?

I was denied,
But now Ive learned.
Im getting ready.

Im gonna get
The thing I earned.
Im really ready.
Im really ready for you.
Im really ready to do
Something Ive wanted to do
For so long!
BRETT
Oh, hey Lucy.

ws

bad bad ne

EDDIE
What is a man
When he gives up his soul
For a lick
From a chick
Who completely takes
control?

CHEERLEADERS
O-P-P!

MALCOLM
Tell the tale.

LUCY
Opportunity!

EDDIE
How does a man who can
see behind his head
Turn as blind as a bat with
no eyes?

(kissing BRETT)
CHEERLEADERS
O-P-P, opportunity!
O-P-P!
LUCY
Opportunity!
CHEERLEADERS
O-P-P, opportunity!
Whoa-oh, whoa-oh-oh!
Whoa-oh, whoa-oh-oh!
Whoa-oh, whoa-oh-oh!
Whoa-oh, whoa-oh-oh!
LUCY
What kind of best friend
would I be
If I didnt take advantage of
an opportunity?

MALCOLM & EDDIE

That girl is bad bad news!
Bad news!
Nothing but tears,
Nothing but trouble,
Nothing but stress!
Yes, she is bad bad news!
Bad news!
EDDIE
Bad news!
MALCOLM & EDDIE
Our buddy Brett
Is gonna regret
That he ever said yes!
The girl may be hot
But all that hes got
Is bad bad news.

SIMON
He wont play.

RICHIE
Shes like a snake!

EDDIE, MALCOLM and

SIMON
How could one tongue
destroy a whole team?

EDDIE
Shes like a cockroach!

EDDIE, MALCOLM, SIMON

and RICHIE
That girl is bad bad news!
Bad news!
SIMON
Very bad news.

SIMON
Shes like a cow!
A skinny cow.
ALL
Wow, she is bad bad news!
Bad news!
MALCOLM
Trs bad!

ALL
Weve been abandoned,
Left in the sand and
Who are we now?
He fell for a slut
With a fabulous butt
But shes bad bad news.
EDDIE
Perhaps theres a way we can
dispose of her.
MALCOLM
Maybe she can meet with an
accident?
SIMON
We have got to make clear that
shes not welcome here,
The most horrible way we
can find.

MALCOLM
What is a man
When he turns on his friends?
Weve been tossed
Now were lost,
Just a platter of burnt ends.

EDDIE
What do you do when your
friends lifes at stake?
MALCOLM
Man, hes flipped.

MALCOLM
We could go train a pit bull
to chew on her flesh.

EDDIE
I feel you.

SIMON
No, hes whipped
Like the cream on a cake.

EDDIE
I dont think they attack their
own kind.

EDDIE
What can we say?

RICHIE
We could torture her mother
and chop up her dog.

MALCOLM
How do we make
Our hero wide awake
So that he
Can reAlize?

MALCOLM
He wont talk.

SIMON
To be honest, I dont think
shed mind!

From L to R: Joey La Varco, Eamon Foley, Malik Hammond, Al Calderon

EDDIE
I could rip off her
pocketbook.
Look, its a start.
MALCOLM
Drive a stake through her
heart, if she just had a heart.
ALL
The longer it goes, the
worse itll get!
So somebodys gotta tell
Brett!

Throw her under the bus

And come back to us!
MALCOLM
Even though she has
excellent shoes...
ALL
Shes bad, bad, bad, bad,
bad, bad, bad, bad
News!
Bad news!

RICHIE
Yeah!

tell her

ALL
That girl is bad, bad news!
Bad news!
She took our pal.
She took our leader
And led him astray!
Hey! Hey!
Shes totally bad bad news!
Bad news!

EVAN
Tell her youve thought
about what happened.
Tell her you havent
slept at night.
Tell her although you made a
huge mistake,
You want to make it right.

EDDIE
Bad news!
MALCOLM
Bad news!
ALL
Listen up, Brett!
Youre not ruined yet!
Well show you the way!

Tell her you know

you arent perfect.
Tell her youve waited
way too long.
Tell her youre sorry
Tell her you mean it.
Tell her you just were wrong.
PATRICE
Tell her she shouldnt have
ignored you

Or dissed you in front of all

the school.
Tell her the minute she got
out of touch,
You felt like such a fool.
Tell her that studying together
Was so nice you prayed it
wouldnt end.
Say you forgive her.
Say you were jealous.
Ask if shell be your friend.

PATRICE
Tell her you mean it.
EVAN & PATRICE
Ask for another chance.
Tell her you just want
another chance.

ue

Standing face to face

Laughing and talking and
holding hands
And slurping all the way to
First base!
But everything Charlotte
says is a lie,
You better not believe her!

it cant be tr

MOLLY
Kendra and Evan?

EVAN & PATRICE

Tell her that people get
things wrong,
Cause people are afraid
They wont fit in your world
Or in your life.
But things will work out fine
If she will only listen.

MOLLY
Oh hey, Lucy? Whats up?

LUCY
Yep.

LUCY
Check this out. I just got the
juiciest text from Charlotte,
who told me the nastiest
thing about Kendra.

MOLLY
What about Brett?

PATRICE
Tell her that all you ever
wanted

MOLLY
Kendra! No! What?

EVAN
Tell her that all you ever
wanted

LUCY
All right, Ill tell you. But
remember

EVAN & PATRICE

A smile or a glance.

Everything Charlotte says

is a lie.
Its a lie, its a lie, its a lie.
Everything Charlotte says
is a lie,
You better not believe her.

EVAN
Tell her youre sorry.

Cause she says she saw

Kendra and Evan at the mall,

PATRICE
Was maybe

LUCY
I know, shes so full of it! But
really, really, really, dont say
anything!
MOLLY
Of course not! I wont say
a word.
CHARLOTTE & CASSIE
Yello?
MOLLY
Cassie?
LUCY
Charlotte!

CASSIE & CHARLOTTE

Yo.
MOLLY
Everything Charlotte says
is a lie.
LUCY
Everything Molly says
is a lie.
BOTH
Its a lie, its a lie, its a lie.
MOLLY
Everything Charlotte
says is a lie
LUCY
Everything Molly says is a lie,
BOTH
You better not believe her!
MOLLY
Cause I just heard that
BOTH
She said she saw
Kendra and Evan
MOLLY
On their bikes
Having a little race.
LUCY
Molly saw Kendra in the park
Letting Evan get to second base!

MOLLY
But everything Charlotte
says is a lie!
BOTH
You better not believe her!
CASSIE, CHARLOTTE &
MOLLY
Holy mack-a-roly, oh,
it cant be true!
No, you cant repeat a single
word Im telling you!
And oh, can you imagine
what Brett would do
If he heard that kind of a
rumor?

CASSIE
So dont say nothing
CHARLOTTE
But she just told me
MOLLY
She said she saw
ALL THREE
Kendra and Evan at the game,
Then they vanished without
a trace.
Then she saw Kendra under
the bleachers
Lettin Evan get to
Third base!

ALL SEVEN
Holy mack-a-roly, oh,
it cant be true!
Theres an awful lot of
trouble they could get in to!
And oh, can you imagine
what Brett would do
If he heard that kind of a
rumor?
EDDIE
Everything Kendra says is
a lie!
EDDIE & MALCOLM
Its a lie! Its a lie! Its a lie!

MOLLY
Everything Cassie says
is a lie
CHARLOTTE
Everything Molly says
is a lie
CASSIE
Everything Charlotte says is
ALL THREE
Its a lie, its a lie, its a lie!
MOLLY
Making up stories,
I dont know why.
ALL THREE
You better not believe her!
From L to R: Brynn Williams, Caitlin Gann, Ariana Grande, Elizabeth Egan Gillies, Delaney Moro

MALCOLM
Doin the tongue with some
other guy!
EDDIE & MALCOLM
You better believe it!
ALL
Cause he said she saw
She said she saw
She said he saw
Kendra and Evan at the mall
Kendra and Evan at the park
Kendra and Evan at the lake
Kendra and Evan at the
movies
Kendra and Evan at the zoo
LUCY
And I just saw them
Right now!

Forget what you planned.

Hey, I understand.
If thats what it is,
Then thats what it is.
Though thats not the way I
choose to see it.
I have my own view that works
With all these jerks
And unenlightened fools.
I make my own rules.
I do what I can.
If I hit the wall,
Well, maybe its all just part
of the plan.
Tomorrow will come,
Today will be gone:
And so I put one foot in
front of the other,
One foot in front of the other
And just keep walking on.
PATRICE
If thats what it is,

t it is

if thats wha

ARCHIE
If thats what it is,
Then thats what it is.
Youre probably right to just
forget it.
Lets face it,
youve worked so hard,
And now youre scarred
And free of any hope.
I guess you should mope.

ARCHIE
If thats what it is,
PATRICE
What also is true
ARCHIE
What also is true
BOTH
Is it may not always be
disaster.

PATRICE
I realize that now it is,
But how it is
Isnt how its got to be.
Another day comes,
Another day goes,
And if I get teased or hurt
Or lied to or punched
in the nose,
I say I wont cry,
I cry until dawn,
And then I put one foot in
front of the other
PATRICE & ARCHIE
One foot in front of the other
PATRICE
And just keep walking on.
EVAN
Im becoming a man.
Maybe all that it means is I face
The world for what
It is and not
What I wish it would be.
Im becoming a man.
Watching everything fall
into place,
I swing, I miss;
Ill get through this,
I almost guarantee.
One day Ill be thirty,
One day Ill be fine,
One day Ill make fun of this
dramatic life of mine.

One day Ill be older

And then Ill write a book
About the choices that I
made
PATRICE
The choices that you made
EVAN
And the chances that I took.
PATRICE
The chances that you
ARCHIE
If thats what it is,
Then thats what it is.
At least until Disney can
rewrite it.
We put on our shoes and socks
And take the knocks
And wish that it would
change
PATRICE
And maybe it will.
EVAN
And maybe it can.
ARCHIE
Until then, you trust
That all this is just
becoming a man.
PATRICE
You take your best shot

ALL THREE
Cause look what you/I got!
PATRICE
Go on and put one foot in
front of the other.
EVAN
One foot in front of the other.
ARCHIE
One foot in front of the other,
EVAN
One foot in front of the other,
ARCHIE
The crip, the geek, the Jew
and his mother
PATRICE
And just keep walking on.

a little more

homework

EVAN
If you stand here behind me
And you call me a man
And youre counting on me
to come through,
You should know that
Ill give you
The best that I can,
But we all have a little more
homework to do.

If youre walking beside me

And you want to be friends,
You should know Im
depending on you.
So you gotta hang in there
Til the whole story ends
Cause we all have a little
more homework to do.
And Ive been looking in the
back of the book for the
answers,
Hoping the bell wouldnt chime,
But Im not ready to put
down my pencil just yet,
There are too many answers
that I didnt get.
I need a little less pressure,
And a little more time.
I am trying to follow,
I am trying to lead,
I am trying to find what is true,
But if youre gonna stand
with me,
Then you have to concede
That we all have a little
more homework to do.
CHARLOTTE
Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day
Turns to day turns to day.
You get a little bit older,
a little bit taller,
A little bit better, a little bit.
Day turns to day turns to

day turns to day turns to day

And the days before all go
too fast,
You cant hold on.
So you go

a little bit faster,

A little bit closer, a little bit.
Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day turns to
day turns to day

CHARLOTTE & RICHIE

& EVAN
Day turn to day turns to day
turns to day
Turns to day turns to day

And the sky goes blue and

the sky goes black
And no matter what you do,
you cant go back, you go
Day into day into day

EVAN
And Im a little bit older,
a little bit stronger,
A little bit smarter
a little bit.

EVAN
I turned thirteen, my parents
got divorced, and I moved
from New York City to the
middle of nowhere.

CHARLOTTE & RICHIE

& EVAN
Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day
Turns to day

ALL
Day into day into day.

CHARLOTTE
And the days ahead comin
on so quick,
You cant get out of the way.
CHARLOTTE & RICHIE
& EVAN
You keep runnin
ALL KIDS
Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day
Turns to day turns to day
And Im a little bit older,

PATRICE
I turned thirteen, and I kissed
a boy. More than once!
KENDRA
I turned thirteen and signed a
virginity pledge.
ALL
Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day turns to
day turns to day
LUCY
I was diagnosed with an
eating disorder.

BRETT
I failed math. But we won the
championship!
All
And Im a little bit braver,
a little bit broader,
A little bit brighter,
a little bit
ARCHIE
I turned thirteen and I had
to have spinal cord surgery.
God, that sucked.
ALL
Day turns to day turns to day!
EDDIE
I got busted for driving my
Dads pickup.
ALL
Day turns to day turns to day!
CHARLOTTE
I got drunk.
MOLLY
And Ive been looking in the
back of the book for the
answers.
Hoping the bell wouldnt chime.
MALCOLM
My parents split up.

CASSIE
But Im not ready to put
down my pencil just yet.
SIMON
There are too many answers
that I didnt get.
RICHIE
I need a little less pressure.
ALL
And a little more time.
I am trying to follow,
I am trying to lead,
I am trying to learn what is true.
I am trying to be what you
want and I need
And we all have a little
more homework.
We all have a little more
homework.
We all have a little more
homework to do
(Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day turns to day)
A little more homework
to do
(Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day turns to day)
A little more homework
to do
(Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day turns to day)
A little more homework
to do
(Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day turns to day)

A little more homework

to do
(Day turns to day turns to
day turns to day turns to day)

I figured no one would be

there for me,
But now, now, now
I see a brand new you.

EVAN
My name is Evan Goldman.
I live at 24 Plains Drive,
Appleton, Indiana. Im thirteen
years old. And Im just
getting started.

MOLLY & CHARLOTTE

I never knew that you could
understand,

brand new

you

CASSIE
I saw the cover and I judged
the book.
I turned away without a
second look,
But now, now, now
I see a brand new you.
I told myself I better run
and hide.
I never noticed what was
there inside,
But now, now, now
I see a brand new you,
And I cant stop myself
from lovin
Evry itty bitty thing you do!
CHARLOTTE
I didnt know where I
was meant to be.

MOLLY, CHARLOTTE &

CASSIE
But I looked up and you
reached out your hand,
And now, now, now
I see a brand new you!
CHARLOTTE
I opened my eyes
And theres a great big world
around.
I opened my eyes,
And just look, just look,
Look at what I found!
CHARLOTTE & CASSIE
I opened my eyes
And theres a great big world
around.
I opened my eyes...
CASSIE
And just look, just look,
Look at what I found!

credits
RECORDING PRODUCED BY Jeffrey Lesser
and Jason Robert Brown
EXECUTIVE ALBUM PRODUCERS:
Kurt Deutsch and Bill Rosenfield
Recorded August 30, 31, and September 1, 2008
at Legacy Studio A509, NYC
ASSOCIATE ALBUM PRODUCERS:
Noah Cornman and Steve Norman
RECORDED AND MIXED BY Jeffrey Lesser
ENGINEER: Bojan Dugic
PRO-TOOLS OP/2ND ENGINEER: Missy Webb
ASSISTANT ENGINEERS: David Herman,
Don Goodrick, Tyler Can Dalen
CUE MIXER: Chris Jennings
MASTERED BY Chris Gehringer at Sterling Sound
CHILD GUARDIANS: Ashley Gonzales, Libby Stevens
ALBUM PACKAGE DESIGN: Jessica Disbrow Talley
PHOTOS: Justin Borucki
ALBUM PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS: Kate Rousseau,
Joey Oliva, Johnna Jackson
GENERAL MANAGEMENT: 101 Productions, LTD.
Wendy Orshan / Jeffrey M. Wilson
David Auster
COMPANY MANAGER: Sean Free
ASSISTANT COMPANY MANAGER: Chris DAngelo
PRODUCTION STAGE MANAGER: Rick Steiger
SHOW PRESS REPRESENTATIVE: Barlow / Hartman
ALBUM PRESS REPRESENTATIVE: Seth Cohen PR

PROPS FROM JRB: David O, Thomas

Murray,
Craig
Wolynez,
Aaron
Fischer, Brian Kennedy, Joel Ehrlich,
Madeline Puzo, Todd Graff, Michele
Lynch, Adam Ben-David, Freddie
Gershon, French Woods Festival of the
Performing Arts (Ron Schaefer, Jeff
Maynard), Stagedoor Manor, Lincoln
Center Theatre, Cat Davis, Brooke
Pierce, Georgia Stitt, Molly Cate
Brown, and all of the cast members
and musicians (and their parents) who
have contributed so much to 13 on
the road to Broadway.
13 opened on October 5th, 2008 at
the Bernard B. Jacobs Theatre in New
York City
Music and Lyrics by Jason Robert
Brown, 2008 Semolina Farfalle
Music Co., Inc. (ASCAP)
SPECIAL THANKS: Bob Harris, Mark
Sendroff, Joaquin Esteva, Robert Robles,
Chris Bubacz, Sarah Marcus, Ashley
Nelson, Nancy Neos, Russ Anixter and
Don Rice
For more information about 13 the musical,
visit WWW.13THEMUSICAL.COM
WWW.GHOSTLIGHTRECORDS.COM