Merchants - Negotiation and Conflict Resolution Course

2. Influence

2. Influence
This document outlines some of the rules of influence that I have been fortunate enough to
learn from the finest negotiators at this time.

In general, people believe that all their decisions are rational and, even though this may be
true at times, decisions are largely riddled with automatisms.

Our education, prejudices, learning and prior experiences lead us into developing a set of
“automatisms” when it comes to analysing, interpreting and solving situations.

Life is a constant decision-making process. Every day we take hundreds of them, so it is im-
possible to carefully, reasonably and objectively analyse all of them. To survive and become
more efficient, we have devised a series of shortcuts that allow us to take decisions quickly in
most situations.

If, for example, we must choose between two apparently similar products, one of which is
cheap and the other expensive, which one would you select as being of better quality? You
see what I mean? Decisions are not based on objective criteria or on a process of rational
reflection. You are accustomed to simplifying things and all through your life, as a result of
your experience and education, you have come to associate a high price with better quality,
though this is not always the case.

The rules of influence will help you understand some of these automatisms and shortcuts,
thereby enabling you to use them to your advantage when negotiating, persuading and
influencing.

The Rule of Reciprocity

When you do someone a favour, you generate a feeling of indebtedness in him/her. We tend
to “re-pay” what others give us.

That is how we are taught from childhood; to say thanks when given something. If a child
invites you to his birthday party, you should also invite him/her. When someone does you a
favour, you return the favour or you show appreciation…

Doing favours, making gestures, being grateful, allowing customers to try your product,
inviting to lunch, being friendly... are ways often used by sellers and negotiators to generate
that feeling of indebtedness in others.

Reciprocity is a key factor in the concession process: giving way generates an automatic
feeling of indebtedness in the other party. Be sure to take advantage of it.

The Rule of Contrast

The Bellini brothers owned a men’s clothes store on a famous street in Milan. The technique
they implemented was as follows: One of the brothers, feigning to have hearing problems,
was the one who served the customers, while the other was the cashier. Each time a cus-

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Merchants - Negotiation and Conflict Resolution Course
2. Influence

tomer enquired how much a specific jacket cost, the customer-serving brother would ask
the cashier brother for the cost, loudly. The cashier-brother would answer back: “12 ducats”.
The customer-serving brother with the hearing problems (who was in fact none other than
a good actor) would repeat the question even louder since his hearing problem did not al-
low him to understand well. The cashier-brother would repeat the same answer: “12 ducats”.
The customer-serving brother would tell the customer what he had heard: “The jacket costs
2 ducats”. The customer would hurriedly say “I’ll take it, I’ll pay you for it now, since I’m in a
hurry”, thinking he was acquiring something good at an excellent cost.

This is what I call the Rule of Contrast. Nothing is cheap or expensive, good or bad, cold or
hot in itself, but may appear so on the basis of the references with which they are compared.

This is the reason why sellers always show the most expensive articles first. Afterwards,
any other price will seem cheap because you compare it with the first. It has an additional
effect: when you compare the characteristics of a cheaper product (which would have
initially satisfied you) to the much better characteristics of the more expensive product, it
makes you wonder whether or not the cheap product is sufficient. That is the reason why
we often end up spending more than planned when we go shopping.

Does it not feel good to compare the original price (crossed out) to the final discounted
price when shopping during sales? Actually, in deciding, the relative difference in the prices
weighs more heavily than the final price to be paid.

The Rule of Consistency

People prefer to be consistent. “Consistent” is an adjective that we all perceive as positive. We
have been taught that way and it is highly valued in society.

We need to be consistent with our ideas, principles and commitments.

When you take a decision and make an investment or an effort, you tend to convince your-
self that it is the correct thing to do.

Every sales person knows that the sale can only be successful if the customer is convinced to
make a small investment or a commitment. For example, the customer has to agree to test
the product, visit the production site, take time to eat with you or analyse the details of the
product. Any small effort will make the customer feel more committed towards your prod-
uct: after all, he has invested something, he won’t want to give it up…

Jokes played on novices, tests to gain access to elite groups, initiation rituals… are acts that
groups, clans, tribes, sects… have employed from time immemorial to reinforce group cohe-
sion. When one member makes such an “investment” to gain access to a group, he becomes
much more faithful, more committed and more supportive with the rest of the members of
the group. In some way, he must convince himself that the effort he made is worthwhile.

Armies with the toughest initiation rites have always been the most revered, for their brav-
ery, their unity and their strength.

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Merchants - Negotiation and Conflict Resolution Course
2. Influence

The Rule of Consensus

We tend to determine what is correct on the basis of what others perceive as correct. If
everyone buys a product it must be because it is good. If everyone runs, we run. When in
doubt, we look around us to decide what to do on the basis of what others are doing.

Doing things differently from the majority is actually uncomfortable, it is not accepted and
can even be dangerous.

Many people know how to take advantage of such a simple automatism. For example, the
inn boys let everyone see the most generous tips. When customers weigh up whether or not
to leave a tip, or what amount, they are clearly influenced by the tips they see around them.
Some good sellers know that one of the best sales arguments is the testimony of his actual
customers. After all, if they have so many important customers, it must be because they are
good.

The Rule of Association

We often do business, close deals, enter agreements and relate with people we know and
we like.

Who do we like? Those with whom we have collaborated and worked together, those with
whom we have a good relationship, those we think are attractive, those who are similar to us
and those with whom we associate things that we like.

The Rule of Authority

We have an enormous feeling of respect for authority, whether it be administrative, military,
educative or medical…

The force of an argument is multiplied the moment it is backed by an “authority”. The best
negotiators are capable of seeking the support of “specialists” to back their arguments. Medical
product sellers always use opinions of doctors or research institutions to support their sales. A
recommendation from the biggest stockbreeder in town would have more impact on the de-
cisions of other stockbreeders than that from an agricultural products seller or from a politician.

In general, we let ourselves be much more easily persuaded by one person to whom we grant
authority on a given issue, either because of his/her position, knowledge, experience, power…

The Rule of Scarcity

We give more value to something that is scarce.

Our freedom of choice becomes more limited the less possibilities we have.

Censorship makes people want for more of what is actually censored. Prohibition reinforces
the desire to possess or consume the forbidden product. Scarcity increases the demand and
value of the product.

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is strictly forbidden without prior written permission by the copyright holder.
Merchants - Negotiation and Conflict Resolution Course
2. Influence

Many merchants offer “unique, “limited edition” products. Some negotiators offer proposals
with strict time limits for acceptance. Storekeepers shout their wares as “last units available”
so as to increase the desire of their customers…

As both a negotiator and a person, taking these rules into account will enable you to use
them to persuade and influence others, hopefully with ethics and responsibility, and avoid
being consciously or unconsciously manipulated.

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is strictly forbidden without prior written permission by the copyright holder.