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SMALL TALK For Big Results: Warm Up Questions

Here are a few ways Miriam could provide verbal feedback to show she's actively listening: Miriam: Red wine from Spain, that sounds wonderful. The Spanish reds are always so full-bodied and flavorful. Miriam: Great choice. I'm sure the visitors will enjoy having a taste of Spanish wine at the event. Miriam: Spanish red wine, huh? That's a nice touch to represent your home country. I bet it will be a big hit. By repeating a few key details and commenting on what Enrique has said, Miriam demonstrates she's paying attention and engaged in the conversation. Active listening is important for building rapport. *Making connections

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251 views7 pages

SMALL TALK For Big Results: Warm Up Questions

Here are a few ways Miriam could provide verbal feedback to show she's actively listening: Miriam: Red wine from Spain, that sounds wonderful. The Spanish reds are always so full-bodied and flavorful. Miriam: Great choice. I'm sure the visitors will enjoy having a taste of Spanish wine at the event. Miriam: Spanish red wine, huh? That's a nice touch to represent your home country. I bet it will be a big hit. By repeating a few key details and commenting on what Enrique has said, Miriam demonstrates she's paying attention and engaged in the conversation. Active listening is important for building rapport. *Making connections

Uploaded by

vivianmuller70
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
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Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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SMALL TALK for big results

1) What is small talk?


2) Warm up questions
3) Small talk tips
4) How to avoid awkward silence with examples.
5) Topics examples
6) Small talk purposes with examples

1) What is small talk?


Small talk is meaningless conversation in terms of content, but is often seen as socially important in
certain situations, or context. In many English-speaking countries, it can be viewed as rude or
unfriendly not to participate in it. Some people like small talk because they find silence
uncomfortable and/or they enjoy communicating verbally. Others enjoy meeting new people and use
it to start conversations.

1. Warm up questions.

What do you small talk about?


Who do you small talk with?
When do you small talk?
Where do you small talk?
Are there any “ forbidden topics” for small talk?
What are men´s favourite subjects for small talk? And women´s?

2) Small talk tips!

The following ten tips will help you master the art of small talk:
1. Have approachable body language: open stance, eye contact, and smile. Casual eye contact and a
warm friendly smile demonstrate your interest and desire to communicate.
2. Take the initiative and be the first to say hello. Be the first to introduce yourself and ask an open-
ended question. This not only demonstrates confidence and shows interest in the other person, but it
gives you an opportunity to guide the conversation.
3. Begin with statements or questions about the immediate environment, situation, weather, how the
person arrived at your location, et cetera. A compliment is also a great way to start a conversation.
4. Be well-informed and prepared. Read newspapers and news magazines to be knowledgeable about
what is going on in the world. Go prepared with topics or experiences to discuss that you think will be of
interest to the persons you will be meeting.
5. Focus on the other person and less on yourself. This will help you feel less self-conscious, and
make the other person feel important.
6. Do listen. Control internal and external distractions. Be present; watch the tendency to daydream. Truly
listening to another person is the highest compliment you can pay them.
7. Keep the tone light and positive until you find a topic in which you are both interested.
8. Discuss general-interest subjects such as movies, theater, sports, books, movies, food, travel and
hobbies. It demonstrates to others that you are approachable and friendly.
9. Think before you speak. It makes you appear thoughtful; and it may help you avoid a faux pas, or
saying something that is better left unsaid.

10. Always close a conversation before walking away from the other person by using a graceful
exit line; don’t simply melt from conversations. “It’s been great talking with you. I really enjoyed
hearing about…” “ I need to… ( go to the toilet, look for my…) see you around.

3) Two steps to avoid awkward silence:


1. Remember what THEY SAY.
2. Ask them open-ended questions ABOUT WHAT THEY SAY. (NOTE: Open ended questions
are not yes/no but instead ask them to give you a unique answer that gives you information
about them. The W’s WHAT WHY & HOW are great indications of open-ended questions, as are
phrases that ask for more information).

Here’s an example: You’re introduced to a friend’s friend at a party.

YOU: What did you do last weekend?


THEM: Went camping in the mountains.
YOU: Camping, cool! Tell me about it?
THEM: (They then happily talk about this cool thing they did & you make a sweet new friend).
Easy, right!? Notice that the questions were open ended.

4) Some topic examples:

Conversation Starters
Here are some ideas for conversation topic starters that should almost work in every situation.

Talk about the spread


Many situations that are appropriate for small talk involve
food, so use that as a way to open up dialogue:

 Wow, this food looks amazing. What would you recommend?


 That cake looks divine, where did you find it?
 Everything is delicious; do you know who prepared it?
 I’m not familiar with this dish. Do you know what’s in it?
 Oh wonderful, they have my favorite dish!

Pay someone a compliment

Everyone loves to be paid a compliment from time to time, so don’t be


shy and let someone know when they’ve impressed you in some way:

 That brooch is beautiful, wherever did you get it?


 I wish I could steal your stylist for myself!
 Your letter to the editor was a great read. I would love to hear more of your thoughts on the issue.
 How do handle so much responsibility so calmly?
 You’ve done such a nice job handling the merger, you really helped lighten the load for me and I
appreciate that. Can I help you out with anything?

Talk shop

Discuss what you do and what you are interested in doing:

 Are you in the film industry, too?


 Oh, interesting. What made you go into psychiatry?
 Educators are so amazing to me, your work is so important! What’s your favorite thing about teaching?
 How long have you been a weatherman?
 What do you think about the new technologies coming out in the design world?
 Where’s your favorite business-trip destination?
 Can you recommend any conferences I should attend as a writer?

Talk about background

This can be tricky, as no one wants to be nosey. But, asking polite


questions about someone’s background shows interest and can be a great way to open up dialogue:

 What town did you grow up in?


 Do you come from a large family?
 Where is the furthest place you’ve ever travelled to?
 What sports did you play throughout school?
 I noticed your accent, where’s it from?
 What brought you to the city?

Get a little bit personal

By asking more personal questions you will get to become


more quickly become familiar with the person you are speaking with:

 What’s your favorite book?


 Who would you bet on to win the Superbowl this year?
 Do you have any interesting hobbies?
 I love watersports, they’re my passion. How about you?
 What’s your favorite holiday?
 If you could go back in time, to what time period would you travel?

Beautiful day, isn't it?


There are some topics that never get old, talking about the
wheather is certainly one of them.

 It looks like it's going to rain. What kind of weather do you like?
 This whether makes me think of BBQ, how about you?
 Can you believe all of this snow we've been having?
 How about this wheather?
 I hear they're calling for rain all weekend. Did you order this?
 We couldn't ask for a nicer day, could we?
 Can't believe it is Februrary, it is so hot outside.

What a nice occasion!

Use the following ideas for events like business lunches or parties,
where the event itself helps give you common ground.

 How do you know the host?


 Did you enjoy the speech/presentation just as well as me?
 Have you attended this event in the past?
 Have you tried the strawberry cake?
 What do you do for a living?
 What do you like to do when you are not working?
 Pretty nice place, isn't it?
 I love your dress. Where did you get it from?

Follow up questions

Be sure to pay attention to the answers people give you. The 5 Ws


and H can be great for this:

 Who first introduced you to your favorite film?


 What was it like moving across the country on your own?
 When did you know that you wanted to be a doctor?
 Where did you pick up your impeccable fashion sense?
 Why aren't you writing professionally, you're so talented with words.
 How do you manage to stay so up to date on the new technologies?

More conversation ideas

There are some more examples that often work well - as long as you keep away from controversial
subjects.

 Recent, non-political and positive news


 Mutual friends and nostalgic memories
 Sport results

6)Small talk purposes:

* Sharing experiences, Reconnecting

We use small talk to start building relationships with people we’d like to do business with, we’ll look at ways
of expressing agreement, reconnecting with people you’ve met before and talking about shared
experiences. Small talk is as much about technique as topic! Find out if there’s something that you have in
common with the other person. You can compare these experiences to similar ones you have had. This
helps you to connect, or to reconnect, with your conversation partner.

Miriam: Hey, Enrique! It’s great to see you again!

Enrique: Yes, great to see you, too! How was your flight?

Miriam: Oh, fine. Well, unfortunately the airline lost my luggage.

Enrique: Oh, no! That happened to me, too, on my last business trip. What kind of suitcase have you got?

Miriam: Medium-sized, hard case, black, with a red ribbon on the handle.

Enrique: Same here! Maybe they always take the black ones! Or the ones with the ribbons.

Miriam: It’s really annoying, you know?

Enrique: That’s so true! What are you going to do next? Miriam: Well, the airline said I should phone this
afternoon.

*Active listening Verbal feedback

One of the most important elements of small talk is good listening. Only by listening can you build good
relationships. You can be giving verbal feedback, picking up cues and repeating key words.

Enrique: At the delegates’ get-together tonight, we’ll be offering visitors red wine from Spain.

Miriam: I see.

Enrique: Joe usually chooses the wine, and he tends to go for Italian.

Miriam: I’m with you.

Enrique: This year, I offered to find a Spanish wine that’s good, and affordable.

Miriam: Right!

Enrique: You see, I have a cousin who owns a vineyard.


Miriam: Oh, really?

Enrique: Yes, and she produces her wines organically.

Miriam: That’s interesting.

*Picking up cues

Another method of active listening is to “pick up cues” — that is, listen for key pieces of information — and
then ask short questions about something the person has just said.

Miriam: I have tickets for a show.

Enrique: Oh, really? Which one are you going to see?

Miriam: Well, I want to finally see the Phantom of the Opera!

Enrique: Right! Where’s it playing?

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