Close Reading Analysis 1
Transitioning takes a lot of courage however it also requires the arduous task of gaining a
sense of confidence and acceptance of one’s true self. This struggle and journey of self-
acceptance is only made harder by people’s negative reactions, comments, and opinions.
Additionally, it is not easy to learn all the facets of being a certain gender if one has not grown
up in that specific gender which leads to one being very self-conscious. These issues and ideas
are highlighted in an interaction between a transgender woman and her friend who inadvertently
alienates her in Ryka Aoki’s To The New World. It is hard to accept one’s true self in a world
that does not agree with how one chooses to identify.
Dealing with the opinions of friends and family who do not agree with who you are as a
person can be demoralizing. This struggle for self-acceptance and confidence can be seen in
Aoki’s text in which the main character Millie is a transgender woman living in Los Angeles.
The majority of this story mostly focuses on a day in which she is celebrating her late
grandmother’s birthday and delves into her relationship with her friend Sierra. Millie is shopping
at a farmer’s market when she runs into Sierra who is a loud and confident lesbian who is very
set in her ideals and does not seem to give a second thought about how her opinions and words
affect others. In contrast, Millie tends to over-think most things and second guesses her actions,
especially regarding her femininity. Sierra was one of the first people Millie came out to which
gave Millie a sense of comfort and safety with her; however, Sierra constantly makes alienating
comments to Millie throughout their conversations such as, “It’s a women only-space. ‘You
know, women women’” (Aoki 58), and comments such as, “With trannies, there was always
male privilege to root out.” (Aoki 57). These kinds of comments can degrade one’s sense of self-
worth and belonging. This is especially true for Millie who is trying her best to be more feminine
and is learning to accept herself. After her conversations with Sierra she thinks about her
grandmother’s experience as an immigrant, how what she did was best for herself and moved to
a new land regardless of other’s opinions. Millie realizes how it is similar to her own journey of
transitioning and she seems to gain a new sense of belonging and confidence even going as far as
to consider asking Sierra out.
The character of Millie in Aoki’s text showcases the struggles of a person trying to be
comfortable in their true self while combating negative comments and opinions. Gaining self-
confidence, accepting oneself, and finding one’s unique identity is often a common problem
young people face in their formative years. This story of self-growth and forming one’s self-
image reveals a parallel to the common coming of age narrative in that it shows how someone
who has transitioned has to find their place in the world in one’s true body similarly to how a
child steps into adulthood through puberty.