EOI Santa Coloma
English Department
Level C2.1
Reading: An excerpt from a novel
Colorless Tsukuru
1
From July of his sophomore year in college until the
following January, all Tsukuru Tazaki could think
about was dying. He turned twenty during this time,
but this special watershed —becoming an adult —
meant nothing. Taking his own life seemed the most
natural solution, and even now he couldn’t say why
he hadn’t taken this final step. Crossing th at
threshold between life and death would have been
easier than swallowing down a slick, raw egg.
Perhaps he didn’t commit suicide then because he
couldn’t conceive of a method that fit the pure and
intense feelings he had toward death. But method was
beside the point. If there had been a door within reach
that led straight to death, he wouldn’t have hesitated
to push it open, without a second thought, as if it
were just a part of ordinary life. For better or for
worse, though, there was no such door nearby .
I really should have died then, Tsukuru often told
himself. Then this world, the one in the here and now,
wouldn’t exist. It was a captivating, bewitching
thought. The present world wouldn’t exist, and reality
would no longer be real. As far as this worl d was
EOI Santa Coloma
English Department
Level C2.1
Reading: An excerpt from a novel
concerned, he would simply no longer exist —just as
this world would no longer exist for him.
At the same time, Tsukuru couldn’t fathom why he
had reached this point, where he was teetering over
the precipice. There was an actual event that had led
him to this place—this he knew all too well —but why
should death have such a hold over him, enveloping
him in its embrace for nearly half a year? Envelop—
the word expressed it precisely. Like Jonah in the
belly of the whale, Tsukuru had fallen into the bowels
of death, one untold day after another, lost in a dark,
stagnant void.
It was as if he were sleepwalking through life, as if he
had already died but not yet noticed it. When the sun
rose, so would Tsukuru —he’d brush his teeth, throw
on whatever clothes were at hand, ride the train to
college, and take notes in class. Like a person in a
storm desperately grasping at a lamppost, he clung
to this daily routine. He only spoke to people when
necessary, and after school, he would ret urn to his
solitary apartment, sit on the floor, lean back against
the wall, and ponder death and the failures of his life.
Before him lay a huge, dark abyss that ran straight
through to the earth’s core. All he could see was a
thick cloud of nothingness s wirling around him; all he
could hear was a profound silence squeezing his
eardrums.
When he wasn’t thinking about death, his mind was
blank. It wasn’t hard to keep from thinking. He didn’t
read any newspapers, didn’t listen to music, and
had no sexual desire to speak of. Events occurring in
the outside world were, to him, inconsequential. When
he grew tired of his room, he wandered aimlessly
around the neighbo urhood or went to the station,
where he sat on a bench and watched the trains
arriving and departing, over and over again.
He took a shower every morning, shampooed his hair
well, and did the laundry twice a week. Cleanliness
EOI Santa Coloma
English Department
Level C2.1
Reading: An excerpt from a novel
was another one of his pillars: laundry, bathing, and
teeth brushing. He barely noticed what he ate. He had
lunch at the college cafeteria, but other tha n that, he
hardly consumed a decent meal. When he felt hungry
he stopped by the local supermarket and bought an
apple or some vegetables. Sometimes he ate plain
bread, washing it down with milk straight from the
carton. When it was time to sleep, he’d gulp down a
glass of whiskey as if it were a dose of medicine.
Luckily he wasn’t much of a drinker, and a small dose
of alcohol was all it took to send him off to sleep. He
never dreamed. But even if he had dreamed, even if
dreamlike images arose from the edg es of his mind,
they would have found nowhere to perch on the
slippery slopes of his consciousness, instead quickly
sliding off, down into the void.
The reason why death had such a hold on Tsukuru
Tazaki was clear. One day his four closest friends, the
friends he’d known for a long time, announced that
they did not want to see him, or talk with him, ever
again. It was a sudden, decisive declaration, with no
room for compromise. They gave no explanation, not
a word, for this harsh pronouncement. And Tsukuru
didn’t dare ask.
After reading this excerpt from Murakami’s novel, prepare an answer for
the following questions. We will discuss them in class, so you don’t need to
write a detailed response. Just take a few notes for each one.
1. You may want to read the book to find out why Tsukuru’s friends cut
him off but, according to you, why do you think this can happen?
2. How would you feel if your friends suddenly turned their backs on
you? Would you demand an explanation or would you wipe the slate
clean?
EOI Santa Coloma
English Department
Level C2.1
Reading: An excerpt from a novel
3. Tsukuru toys with the idea of killing himself after being rejected.
What is the emotional cost of being rejected? Do you think losing
your friends justifies these suicidal thoughts or, is there an
underlying psychological problem?
4. Thanks to (or perhaps because of) the power of social media, people
now talk about cancel culture. What is the idea behind this relatively
new term? Is it effective when it comes to denouncing the
wrongdoings of a public figure? Does it do more harm than good?
5. VOCABULARY: Look up the highlighted verbs in the text and use them
to complete the sentences below. Write the verbs in the correct
form.
a. They stood there motionless _________________ each other
with numbed fingers for the comfort of touch.
b. He ________________ along the floor like a toddler just
learning to walk and eventually had to grab a table to stop
himself from falling.
c. One time, while we were having hotpot dinner, she
__________________ a full pound of fatty beef and her
tummy immediately became bloated.
d. On those grey days in London, I _________________ down the
high street, frittering away on whatever took my fancy. There
wasn’t anything else to do.
e. I __________________ the arm of the sofa. I felt more
comfortable that way.
