Analyzing Trust Issue due to infidelity: lack of commitment in the dating relationship | 2023
Analyzing Trust Issue due to infidelity: lack of commitment in the dating
relationship
Authors
Ghaisani Nurshadrina1 Khalidiya Ninda Widiyastutik 2nd Tatu Zakiyatun Nufus 3rd
st
Psychology faculty of UIN Syarif Hidayatullah Jakarta, Indonesia
Abstract
Infidelity is one of the causes of trust problems. If someone is caught cheating, their partner's response changes
to not easily trusting them, always being suspicious of their partner, even to the point of wanting to end the
relationship. Trust also has an impact on commitment in a relationship. Trust includes guarantees that partners
will uphold their high commitments by openly communicating information and behaving in accordance with the
values and standards of a relationship that should be carried out as a couple. Betrayal of trust will be a difficult
challenge in rebuilding trust. Betrayal of trust will cause someone to experience low thrusters. Commitment is
an important thing in all relationship, especially dating relationship. Commitment affects the condition of a
person's relationship and trust is the basis for creating commitment. This discussion focuses on analyzing trust
issues due to infidelity and commitment in relationships. The data listed is the result of previous research with
similar discussions. Based on theories from several journals, it was found that trust problems arise due to
betrayal of trust. The basis of a commitment is grounded in trust towards the partner.
Keywords: Trust, infidelity, commitment
Introduction
The current era is marked by a surge in cases of infidelity, ranging from dating relationships
to marriages. Infidelity, according to the Indonesian Dictionary (KBBI), is defined as the act
and behavior of hiding something for one's own interests, being secretive, dishonest, and
unfaithful (Depdiknas, 2002:1021). Infidelity becomes one of the causes of trust issues,
characterized by changes in attitude and behavior, as well as the desire to keep something
secret from one's partner, indicating signs of infidelity.
If someone is caught cheating, their partner's response changes to become less trusting,
constantly suspicious, and may even lead to a desire to end the relationship. It can be
observed that trust is easily given to someone, but once trust is broken it is difficult to restore
it to its previous state.
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Analyzing Trust Issue due to infidelity: lack of commitment in the dating relationship | 2023
Having high trust can contribute to building a good relationship with everyone. Trust also
impacts commitment in a relationship. If we have high trust in our partner, it will bring about
a commitment to jointly maintain the relationship. However, when infidelity occurs and
erodes trust in the partner, it can result in a reduction in commitment as well.
Individuals with low commitment will only endure a relationship if the pros outweigh the
cons. In the same timeframe, when there is no commitment, the relationship is likely to end
quickly. However, with commitment, it is expected that the relationship will endure both in
good and bad times, in better or worse forms (p. 287; Kelley, 1983). Having a positive
relationship and commitment also has long-term impacts compared to negative relationships
(e.g., Holt-Lunstad, Chapter 33, this volume; Kiecolt-Glaser et al., 2010).
Literature review
Defining Trust in Relationships
Trust in a relationship relates to confidence and trust in a partner's reliability, honesty and
loyalty. It serves as an important foundation in creating a thriving and lasting relationship.
Trust includes the assurance that partners will uphold their high commitments by openly
communicating information and behaving in harmony according to the values and standards
of a relationship that should be done as a couple.
According to Rotenberg, K. J et al: 2005 there are three fundamental bases of interpersonal
trust. First reliability, refers to the fulfillment of words or promises made by a partner. Second
emotional, dependence on others to refrain from causing emotional harm, such as accepting
disclosures, maintaining confidentiality, refraining from criticism, and avoiding actions that
cause emotional problems. Thirdly honesty, this relates to truth-telling in behavior guided by
good rather than bad intentions and by sincere rather than manipulative strategies.
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Analyzing Trust Issue due to infidelity: lack of commitment in the dating relationship | 2023
Infidelity and its Impact on Trust
Trust is a fundamental thing that everyone should have in dating relationships. Betrayal of
trust will be a difficult challenge in rebuilding trust. In this case, certain events such as
infidelity can cause a rift in trust. Infidelity can adversely affect individuals and relationships.
The betrayal and secrecy associated with infidelity create a tense and hostile atmosphere,
leading to anger, resentment and feelings of betrayal. Those betrayed can experience a loss of
self-esteem, feeling inadequate and insecure. This leads to communication and emotional
intimacy often being compromised, hindering resolution of the underlying issues.
According to Blow and Hartnett: 2005 the impact of infidelity depends on factors such as the
duration and nature of the affair. Long-term affairs or repeated cases of infidelity tend to
cause more significant damage. It is important to recognize that each person may respond to
betrayal in a different way, taking into account the circumstances and dynamics of their
relationship. However, infidelity has the power to slowly undermine the foundation of trust
that was established in the first place. It can cause the once unshakable dimensions of
predictability and reliability to collapse instantly. Betrayal of trust will cause a person to
experience low drive. A person experiencing low drive has a tendency to distrust others until
they have clear evidence that they can be trusted. This often leads to setbacks in starting new
things in a new environment.
The Role of Commitment
According to Agnew (2009), commitment is defined as the intention to continue a series of
actions, and according to Johnson and Huston (1999), commitment is defined as a personal,
moral, and structural component. Therefore, commitment is an effort as a personal
willingness to continue the actions of something more serious.
Commitment is important in all relationship, specifically dating relationship. Commitment
affects the conditions of someone’s relationship, and trust forms the basis of commitment. If
someone’s trust in their partner is high, then the commitment to their relationship will also be
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Analyzing Trust Issue due to infidelity: lack of commitment in the dating relationship | 2023
high, resulting in a healthy and lasting relationship. When someone lacks commitment,
relationships with others will not go well. Therefore, it’s important to have commitment to
maintain the integrity and success of relationships between individuals.
Methodology
This discussion focuses on analyzing trust issues due to infidelity and commitment in
relationships. The data listed are the results of previous research with similar discussions. The
data for this discussion was collected using the listening method, which is paying attention to
the use of language in the object to be studied, Sudaryanto (2015: 203).
Result and finding
JustDating, an online dating app produced in Japan, conducted a survey of people from
various countries to find out if they were involved in infidelity. The findings proved to be
quite astonishing, as based on the survey conducted in 2023, Indonesia emerged as the second
Asian country with the highest rate of infidelity. As many as 40 percent of Indonesian
respondents openly admitted to having cheated. If one's partner is caught having an affair, it
is likely that the relationship will end or the betrayed individual will choose to leave the
relationship.
Based on the theory from several journals, it is found that trust in a relationship is based on
reliability, emotional support, and honesty. It is built through consistent actions and grows as
the relationship progresses, thus fostering a sense of confidence and security. Infidelity can
severely damage trust in relationships, leading to feelings of anger, resentment and betrayal.
The impact depends on factors such as duration and repeated occurrences, and can lead to
low drive and difficulty trusting others. Commitment characterized as a firm determination to
initiate an action is essential in a relationship. The trust that is the foundation of commitment
will foster a strong and lasting bond in the relationship. Thus, the absence of commitment
will potentially cause damage to the structure of the relationship.
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Analyzing Trust Issue due to infidelity: lack of commitment in the dating relationship | 2023
In a dating relationship when partners love each other there will be high trust in their partner.
This trust arises due to the influence of the perception of one's intrinsic and extrinsic motives
which indirectly form a trust due to their attachment to a high love scale. This causes high
trust from the partner, which is a situation where a person experiences high trust in their
partner in believing everything without real evidence. So that when one day there is a
betrayal of trust, a trust problem will arise which causes the person to be afraid to start the
same thing even with a new atmosphere because of the tendency to be disturbed by a sense of
disappointment due to betrayal due to high trust.
Conclusion
Trust serves as the basis for commitment in a relationship encompassing reliability, emotional
support, and honesty. Strong commitment is fostered by high levels of trust which in turn
contributes to healthy and lasting relationships. However, breaches of trust, such as infidelity,
can reduce commitment. The role of commitment is critical in sustaining relationships and is
influenced by trust in dating relationships. A lack of commitment can destabilize a
relationship while strong commitment can strengthen the integrity and success of a
relationship.
In summary, the complex interactions between trust, infidelity and commitment emphasize
the importance of nurturing and maintaining trust in a relationship. The impact of infidelity
on trust can be a significant threat to commitment and has the potential to disrupt the stability
and continuity of a relationship. Therefore, it is imperative that individuals understand the
complexities in dating relationships.
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Analyzing Trust Issue due to infidelity: lack of commitment in the dating relationship | 2023
References
Journal
Agnew, C. R., & Vanderdrift, L. E. (2018). Commitment Processes in Personal Relationships.
In The Cambridge Handbook of Personal Relationships, Second Edition (pp. 437–448).
Cambridge University Press. https://doi.org/10.1017/9781316417867.034
Blow, A. J., & Hartnett, K. (2005). Infidelity in Committed Relationship I: A Methodological
Review.Journal of Marital and Family Therapy
Rempel, J. K., Holmes, J. G., & Zanna, M. P. (1985). Trust in Close Relationships. In Journal
of Personality and Social Psychology (Vol. 49, Issue 1).
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Williams, T. (2014). The Psychology of Interpersonal Trust How People Feel When it Comes
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