1.

It Improves Team Building

Honest and effective communication can create a strong team. When staff
consult with each other, consider other opinions and discuss their progress,
they will be more enthused to collaborate. As a result, the strong unit that
they create makes the workplace more enjoyable, and they will be eager to
perform well so they don’t let their teammates down.

Indeed, communication helps solve employee morale issues by keeping

entire teams in the loop, making all team members feel useful within the
workplace. This lack of secrecy not only boosts team spirit but it also has a
positive effect on staff attitudes.

2. It Boosts Growth
Great communication contributes to the growth of the business, which goes
hand in hand with your career. It eliminates uncertainties and speeds up
the process of policies to ensure there is a smooth delivery of projects.

Take eCommerce website Zappos, for example; their ethos relies on great
communication within the organisation and with their clients – something
that earned them a spot on Fortune magazine’s 2015 list of the 100 best
companies to work for.

3. It Increases Innovation
If employees are scared of communicating their thoughts and ideas out of
fear of being rejected, then they are likely to become stagnant in their
career and only contribute the bare minimum. However, if there is an open
line of communication between supervisors and staff members, they are
encouraged to be more creative and innovative within the workplace, and
they are likely to put forth new and creative ideas.

In today’s fast-moving workplace, most ideas are likely to be pushed under

the carpet due to a lack of communication. As Cisco managing director
Alex Goryachev writes on Forbes: ‘People listen mostly to respond rather
than to understand. However, digitisation demands active listening to the
ecosystem in order to survive and develop collaborative strategies with
startups, partners and customers around the world’.

4. It Improves Productivity
Being able to communicate effectively at work can help increase overall
productivity. Managers can understand their employees’ talents and skills
and will then give clear directions to the people that are best suited for the
job, thus increasing the overall turnaround time of any given project.

For example, one colleague may be faster and better at using Excel than
others; therefore, through communication, a manager can identify this and
task them with managing the spreadsheets. If there was a lack of
conversation, meanwhile, the project would suffer, and the entire process
would slow down, negatively affecting the goal of the company, as a result.

5. It Increases Efficiency
Poor communication compromises efficiency, as well as the overall quality
of work. When instructions aren’t provided clearly, mistakes are bound to
happen. On the other hand, clear instructions eliminate the need to clarify
and correct any issues.

Think back to a time where you didn’t communicate well with a colleague. It
probably resulted in wasted time, effort and resources. So, if you happen to
have a manager that doesn’t communicate effectively, make sure you ask
the right questions to get the information that you need to successfully
complete a project. Over time, they will understand what they should be
supplying you with so you can start working on your tasks.

6. It Increases Loyalty
When you have a good line of communication with management, you’re
naturally going to be more loyal to the organisation. You will feel
comfortable discussing any professional or personal issues, and you’ll be
more committed to the company.

This free line of communication also builds trust between a manager and
an employee, which results in a loyal relationship. A two-way line of respect
ensures there’s no micromanagement involved and that an employee is
trusted to get on with the job that they were hired to do.

7. It Reduces Mitigation Conflict

Two people in the workplace may feel that they are communicating well,
but because they both have different methods of communication, they are
misunderstanding each other. Therefore, working with different
personalities requires excellent communication skills to limit any conflict in
the workplace.
If you are experiencing conflict at work, it’s important to look beyond the
issue at hand and identify the other person’s thought process. You need to
consider the communication pattern of the receiver to get a better
understanding of what they are trying to say.

8. It Increases Employee Engagement

Good communication goes far beyond talking; it’s more about connecting
and engaging with others. When teams are engaged, they are more
aligned with the company’s goals and are generally more motivated to work
towards the set targets.It’s also easier for managers to identify what makes
a positive and satisfying working environment, allowing them to work
towards achieving a balanced working life for their employees.

9. It Resolves Problems
There’s bound to be characters that clash and opinions that differ within
any working environment. And what’s the best way to solve those
problems? Clear communication!Effective communication isn’t about who’s
right and wrong; it’s about having open, honest and positive discussions to
ensure everyone’s needs are met! You’re not always going to see eye to
eye with your work nemesis, but if you can find a way to work well with
them, you’ll make the environment much more enjoyable for everyone
around you!

10. It Enhances Skills

Managers can identify hidden talents when they communicate clearly with
their employees. By doing so, they can tap into these skills and help
enhance them, which will contribute to the overall success of the
business.For example, John may be hired as a customer service
representative, but through conversation, his manager identifies that he has
previous experience in marketing. John is then transferred to Marketing
and is much better suited at the position. If the lack of communication were
there, however, John would have become stagnant later down the line, and
the business would have lost great talent.In every aspect of your job, you’ll
be required to communicate in one way or other. It’s important to
understand just how valuable effective communication is and what impact it
can have on your relationships and your progression within the working
world

Common causes of miscommunication:

 Assumptions. This is the most common cause. Two parties try to

communicate and base that communication off of a set of
 assumptions. If the initial assumption is wrong, then the
communication will be wrong as well.
 Misunderstanding. Communication is both the giving of information to
someone and the receiving of information from someone. If the
person receiving the information doesn’t fully understand and doesn’t
ask for clarification, then miscommunication has happened.
 Lack of listening. We live in a world that loves to talk and rarely
listens. Too often when talking the person “listening” is really just
biding their time until the other person pauses so that they can jump
in with their point. That isn’t listening, its stalling, and its terrible
communication.

Hasty communication. We have all done it, hammered out that last email as
quickly as possible while trying to get out the door because we are running
really late. This is a terrible way to communicate because the
communication is not well thought out or well delivered, so it will either
come off as half baked, rude, or just frustrating.
CAREER DEVELOPMENT

4 Types of Communication
(With Examples)
February 14, 2020

Communication skills are vital to a healthy, efficient workplace.

Often categorized as a “soft skill” or interpersonal skill,
communication is the act of sharing information from one person to
another person or group of people. There are many different ways to
communicate, each of which play an important role in sharing
information.

In this article, we will take a closer look at the different types of

communication and how to strengthen your skills in each.

Importance of communication
We use communication every day in nearly every environment,
including in the workplace. Whether you give a slight head nod in
agreement or present information to a large group, communication
is absolutely necessary when building relationships, sharing ideas,
delegating responsibilities, managing a team and much more.

Learning and developing good communication skills can help you

succeed in your career, make you a competitive job candidate and
build your network. While it takes time and practice, communication
and interpersonal skills are certainly able to be both increased and
refined.

There are four main types of communication we use on a daily

basis: Verbal, nonverbal, written and visual. Let’s take a look at
each of these types of communication, why they are important and
how you can improve them for success in your career.

Related: Common Communication Barriers

Types of communication
There are several different ways we share information with one
another. For example, you might use verbal communication when
sharing a presentation with a group. You might use written
communication when applying for a job or sending an email.

There are four main categories or communication styles including

verbal, nonverbal, written and visual:

1. Verbal

Verbal communication is the use of language to transfer information

through speaking or sign language. It is one of the most common
types, often used during presentations, video conferences and
phone calls, meetings and one-on-one conversations. Verbal
communication is important because it is efficient. It can be helpful
to support verbal communication with both nonverbal and written
communication.

Here are a few steps you can take to develop your verbal
communication skills:

 Use a strong, confident speaking voice. Especially when

presenting information to a few or a group of people, be sure to
use a strong voice so that everyone can easily hear you. Be
confident when speaking so that your ideas are clear and easy
for others to understand.
  Use active listening. The other side of using verbal
communication is intently listening to and hearing
others. Active listening skills are key when conducting a
meeting, presentation or even when participating in a one-on-
one conversation. Doing so will help you grow as a
communicator.

 Avoid filler words. It can be tempting, especially during a

presentation, to use filler words such as “um,” “like,” “so” or
“yeah.” While it might feel natural after completing a sentence
or pausing to collect your thoughts, it can also be distracting
for your audience. Try presenting to a trusted friend or
colleague who can call attention to the times you use filler
words. Try to replace them by taking a breath when you are
tempted to use them.

This involves the use of language and words for the purpose of
passing on the intended message. In general terms, Verbal
Communication means communication in the form of spoken words
only. But, in the context of types of communication, verbal
communication can be in the spoken or the written form. Thus, the
verbal form may be oral or written as discussed below.

 Written Communication: This kind of communication

involves any kind of exchange of information in the written
form. For example, e-mails, texts, letters, reports, SMS, posts on
social media platforms, documents, handbooks, posters, flyers,
etc.
 Oral Communication: This is the communication which
employs the spoken word, either direct or indirect as a
communication channel. This verbal communication could be
made on a channel that passes information in only one form i.e.
sound.
You could converse either face to face, or over the phone, or via
voice notes or chat rooms, etc. It all comes under the oral
communication. This form of communication is an effective
form.

2. Nonverbal

Nonverbal communication is the use of body language, gestures

and facial expressions to convey information to others. It can be
used both intentionally and unintentionally. For example, you might
smile unintentionally when you hear a pleasing or enjoyable idea or
piece of information. Nonverbal communication is helpful when
trying to understand others’ thoughts and feelings.

If they are displaying “closed” body language such as crossed arms

or legs, or hunched shoulders, they might be feeling anxious, angry
or nervous. If they are displaying “open” body language with both
feet on the floor and arms by their side or on the table, they are
likely feeling positive and open to information.

Here are a few steps you can take to develop your nonverbal
communication skills:

 Notice how your emotions feel physically. Throughout the day,

as you experience a range of emotions (anything from
energized, bored, happy or frustrated), try to identify where you
feel that emotion within your body. For example, if you’re
feeling anxious, you might notice that your stomach feels tight.
Developing self-awareness around how your emotions affect
your body can give you greater mastery over your external
presentation.

 Be intentional about your nonverbal communications. Make an

effort to display positive body language when you feel alert,
open and positive about your surroundings. You can also use
body language to support your verbal communication if you feel
confused or anxious about information, like using a furrowed
brow. Use body language alongside verbal communication such
as asking follow up questions or pulling the presenter aside to
give feedback.

 Mimic nonverbal communications you find effective. If you find

certain facial expressions or body language beneficial to a
certain setting, use it as a guide when improving your own
nonverbal communications. For example, if you see that when
someone nods their head it communicates approval and
positive feedback efficiently, use it in your next meeting when
you have the same feelings.
Types of nonverbal communication
The many different types of nonverbal communication or body language
include:

Facial expressions. The human face is extremely expressive, able to convey

countless emotions without saying a word. And unlike some forms of
nonverbal communication, facial expressions are universal. The facial
expressions for happiness, sadness, anger, surprise, fear, and disgust are the
same across cultures.

Body movement and posture. Consider how your perceptions of people are
affected by the way they sit, walk, stand, or hold their head. The way you
move and carry yourself communicates a wealth of information to the world.
This type of nonverbal communication includes your posture, bearing, stance,
and the subtle movements you make.

Gestures. Gestures are woven into the fabric of our daily lives. You may
wave, point, beckon, or use your hands when arguing or speaking animatedly,
often expressing yourself with gestures without thinking. However, the
meaning of some gestures can be very different across cultures. While the OK
sign made with the hand, for example, conveys a positive message in English-
speaking countries, it’s consider offensive in countries such as Germany,
Russia, and Brazil. So, it’s important to be careful of how you use gestures to
avoid misinterpretation.

Eye contact. Since the visual sense is dominant for most people, eye contact
is an especially important type of nonverbal communication. The way you look
at someone can communicate many things, including interest, affection,
hostility, or attraction. Eye contact is also important in maintaining the flow of
conversation and for gauging the other person’s interest and response.

Touch. We communicate a great deal through touch. Think about the very
different messages given by a weak handshake, a warm bear hug, a
patronizing pat on the head, or a controlling grip on the arm, for example.

Space. Have you ever felt uncomfortable during a conversation because the
other person was standing too close and invading your space? We all have a
need for physical space, although that need differs depending on the culture,
the situation, and the closeness of the relationship. You can use physical
space to communicate many different nonverbal messages, including signals
of intimacy and affection, aggression or dominance.

Voice. It’s not just what you say, it’s how you say it. When you speak, other
people “read” your voice in addition to listening to your words. Things they pay
attention to include your timing and pace, how loud you speak, your tone and
inflection, and sounds that convey understanding, such as “ahh” and “uh-huh.”
Think about how your tone of voice can indicate sarcasm, anger, affection, or
confidence

1. Facial Expressions
Without a doubt, the most common—and telling—nonverbal means of communication is
through facial expressions. Human faces are able to make more than 10,000 different
expressions, and each one articulates volumes of information with ease. Smiling, frowning,
blinking, and every teenager’s favorite, eye-rolling, are the strongest and most relatable
expressions, but even the smallest eyebrow twitch or nostril flare can be read with minimal
effort. The most surefire way to establish a connection with a stranger, client, or even long-
time acquaintance: Smile! A smile is welcoming, warm, and establishes you as a person who
people want to spend time with.

2. Body Movements
Body movements, or kinesics, include common practices like hand gestures or nodding.
Very often, body movements convey enthusiasm or excitement. For instance, we all know
someone who “talks with his hands.” However, other aspects of kinesics include actions that
we commonly perceive with nervousness or anxiety like involuntary tremors, frequent
clearing of the throat, or a shaking leg. During meetings, it’s best to keep your hands on a
table or in a gentle clasp. You want to avoid “drumming” on your thigh or repeatedly touching
your face, as these are often distracting.

3. Posture
Posture is critical in making a strong impression. How you stand or sit is one of the important
elements in how you are perceived by others. Someone who stands with their back straight
and head held high exudes confidence, assurance, and strength, while, conversely,
someone who is slouched or facing the floor demonstrates uncertainty, indifference, or even
weakness. To express friendliness and positivity, maintain an open posture. Stand with your
legs hip-distance apart and keep your torso exposed as opposed to covered with your
crossed arms. Keep your head raised and relax your facial expression. A closed posture,
especially crossed arms across the chest, gives the impression of boredom or hostility.

Human faces are able to make more than 10,000 different expressions,
and each one articulates volumes of information with ease."

4. Eye Contact
Perhaps the best way to build rapport with a stranger is by maintaining eye contact.
Eyes can indicate interest, attention, and involvement, while failing to make eye
contact may be interpreted as disinterested, inattentive, or rude. However, this
doesn’t mean you have to stare directly into the face of another person—quite the
opposite, in fact. There is nothing more aggressive than staring intensely into
someone’s eyes. Experts suggest that healthy eye contact consists of looking semi-
randomly at the area around the eyes, which includes the eyelids and eyebrows.

5. Paralanguage
Any parent with small children is familiar with the phrase “don’t use that tone of voice
with me.” This is a perfect example of how paralanguage—the aspects of the voice
that differ from the words—affects the message. The most obvious example is
sarcasm, in which the tone of what’s being said conveys the opposite of the
message. Odds are that someone who drawls “Grreeeattt” in a laconic tone is less
 than thrilled at what’s being presented. Less obvious paralanguage includes the
speed, volume, and pitch of speaking. For example, a presentation mumbled too
quickly suggests that the salesman is, at best, nervous, or, at worst, being
disingenuous. Be conscious of how quickly you talk, and be sure to speak clearly and
loud enough to be heard. But be sure to take care not to be too loud, as this comes
off as belligerent and off-putting.

6. Proxemics
Thanks largely to Seinfeld, the notion of a “close talker” has become part of our
consciousness. People are very protective of their personal space, particularly the
area that Mehrabian calls the “intimate space” (i.e., 6 to 18 inches). This is a zone
generally reserved for family, close friends, or romantic partners. When engaging in
business conversation, you always want to be far enough that the other person is
comfortable, but you do not want to be too far, suggesting that you are distancing
yourself or uninterested in the conversation.

3. Written

Written communication is the act of writing, typing or printing

symbols like letters and numbers to convey information. It is helpful
because it provides a record of information for reference. Writing is
commonly used to share information through books, pamphlets,
blogs, letters, memos and more. Emails and chats are a common
form of written communication in the workplace.

Here are a few steps you can take to develop your written
communication skills:

 Strive for simplicity. Written communications should be as

simple and clear as possible. While it might be helpful to
include lots of detail in instructional communications, for
example, you should look for areas where you can write as
clearly as possible for your audience to understand.

 Don’t rely on tone. Because you do not have the nuance of

verbal and nonverbal communications, be careful when you are
trying to communicate a certain tone when writing. For
example, attempting to communicate a joke, sarcasm or
excitement might be translated differently depending on the
audience. Instead, try to keep your writing as simple and plain
as possible and follow up with verbal communications where
you can add more personality.

 Take time to review your written communications. Setting

time aside to re-read your emails, letters or memos can help
you identify mistakes or opportunities to say something
differently. For important communications or those that will be
 sent to a large number of people, it might be helpful to have a
trusted colleague review it as well.

 Keep a file of writing you find effective or enjoyable. If you

receive a certain pamphlet, email or memo that you find
particularly helpful or interesting, save it for reference when
writing your own communications. Incorporating methods or
styles you like can help you to improve over time.

Related: How to Write a Professional Email

'Written Communication' means the sending of messages, orders or instructions

in writing through letters, circulars, manuals, reports, telegrams, office memos,
bulletins, etc. It is a formal method of communication and is less flexible

4. Visual

Visual communication is the act of using photographs, art,

drawings, sketches, charts and graphs to convey information.
Visuals are often used as an aid during presentations to provide
helpful context alongside written and/or verbal communication.
Because people have different learning styles, visual
communication might be more helpful for some to consume ideas
and information.

Here are a few steps you can take to develop your visual
communication skills:

 Ask others before including visuals. If you are considering

sharing a visual aid in your presentation or email, consider
asking others for feedback. Adding visuals can sometimes
make concepts confusing or muddled. Getting a third-party
perspective can help you decide whether the visual adds value
to your communications.

 Consider your audience. Be sure to include visuals that are

easily understood by your audience. For example, if you are
displaying a chart with unfamiliar data, be sure to take time
and explain what is happening in the visual and how it relates
to what you are saying. You should never use sensitive,
offensive, violent or graphic visuals in any form.

To make improvements to your communication skills, set personal

goals to work through the things you want to accomplish step by
step. It might be helpful to consult with trusted colleagues,
managers or mentors to identify which areas would be best to focus
on first.

LISTENING SKILLS

Listening within the work context is the process by which you gain an
understanding of the needs, demands, and preferences of your stakeholders
through direct interaction. A stakeholder could be anyone from your boss, a
client, customer, co-worker, subordinate, upper management, board member,
interviewer, or job candidate.

There are two components to active listening in the workplace: attention and
reflection.

 Active listening involves holding eye contact, nodding, having good

posture, and mirroring the speaker’s body language to show genuine
interest in what they're saying. In addition to these nonverbal cues, you
must also allow the speaker to finish their thought in its entirety.
 Reflection is the repeating and paraphrasing of what the speaker has
said to show that you truly understand what they're telling you.

Active listening is reacting or doing something that demonstrates you are listening and have
understood.

 Giving non-verbal cues to demonstrate you are paying attention (nodding, making eye
contact, making facial expressions appropriate to what is being said)
 Reflecting back the main points and summarising what has been said
 Non-verbal cues happen naturally, providing you really are listening. If you concentrate
on making the non-verbal cues, then you probably aren�t listening

Examples of Effective Listening

 A job candidate shares her understanding of an unclear question during

an interview and asks if she has it right.
 An interviewer notices that a candidate doesn't look her in the eye when
asserting a key strength.
 A customer service worker repeats a patron’s problem or complaint
back to her to reassure her that she has been heard.

Evaluative listening. In evaluative listening, or critical listening, we make

judgments about what the other person is saying. We seek to assess the truth of
what is being said. We also judge what they say against our values, assessing
them as good or bad, worthy or unworthy. Critical listening is listening in order to
evaluate and judge, forming opinion about what is being said. Judgment includes assessing
strengths and weaknesses, agreement and approval.
This form of listening requires significant real-time cognitive effort as the listener analyzes
what is being said, relating it to existing knowledge and rules, whilst simultaneously listening
to the ongoing words from the speaker.

Selective listening, or selective attention, is the phenomenon that occurs when we

only see what we want to see and hear what we want to hear. It's a type of mental
filtering in which we tune out someone's opinions or ideas when they don't line up
with ours. This isn’t just a bad habit or rude behavior. It’s part of a big problem
which results when you are unable to hear what someone has to say because
you are refusing to submit yourself to the underlying confrontation. That
potential fight is the real reason we often stop hearing what someone has to
say; we’ve already decided they’re wrong because we are right.

Selective auditory attention or selective hearing is a type of selective attention and involves the
auditory system of the nervous system. Selective hearing is characterized as the action in which
people focus their attention on a specific source of a sound or spoken words.

Selective Hearing Can Make You Close-Minded and Destroy the

Relationships You Cherish

Passive Listening is listening without reacting: Allowing someone to speak, without

interrupting. Not doing anything else at the same time.

Passive listening is a one-way form of communication, wherein there is no

exchange involved with the two parties. Examples: Common examples of this form
of listening involve listening to a lecture, watching TV, or listening to the radio.
When a person is practicing passive listening, he is sitting quietly without responding
to what the speaker is saying. When you listen to music or a podcast or even the
news, you are practicing passive listening. Sometimes passive listening may require a
few open-ended replies to keep the speaker talking, however, this technique
generally requires focused concentration and minimal verbal feedback from the
listener. Listening to a lecture in school or watching a movie both require passive
listening skills, and the technique can improve your communication and your ability
to clearly understand the information being presented. While passive listening
requires the listener to sit back quietly and absorb information, active listening is
about engaging the speaker verbally and through the use of body language. Active
listening, which is often used in conflict resolution, counseling, and general
conversation, requires the listener to react to the speaker’s body language as well as
verbal cues in order to understand the subject at hand. Active listening allows for
engaging feedback while passive listening requires silent participation on behalf of
the listener.
 TYPES OF COMMUNICATORS

Passive

Individuals who use the passive communication style often

act indifferently, yielding to others. Passive communicators
usually fail to express their feelings or needs, allowing
others to express themselves. Frequently, a passive
communicator’s lack of outward communication can lead
to misunderstanding, anger build-up or resentment. At the
same time, these communicators can be safer to speak with
when a conflict arises, because they most likely will avoid a
confrontation or defer to others.

Passive communicators often display a lack of eye contact,

poor body posture and an inability to say “no.” Passive
communicators also act in a way that states “people never
consider my feelings.”

But passive communicators are also easy to get along with

as they follow others and “go with the flow.”

Examples of phrases that those who use a passive

communication style would say or may believe include:

 “It really doesn’t matter that much.”

 “I just want to keep the peace”

Aggressive

It’s often apparent when someone communicates in an

aggressive manner. You’ll hear it. You’ll see it. You may
even feel it.

The aggressive communication style is emphasized by

speaking in a loud and demanding voice, maintaining intense
eye contact and dominating or controlling others by blaming,
intimidating, criticizing, threatening or attacking them,
among other traits.

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Aggressive communicators often issue commands, ask
questions rudely and fail to listen to others. But they
can also be considered leaders and command respect from
those around them.

Examples of phrases that an aggressive communicator

would use include:

 “I’m right and you’re wrong.”

 “I’ll get my way no matter what.”
 “It’s all your fault.”
 Examples include statements like “this is what we're doing,” or “get over it”; body
language includes crossing arms, eye rolling, or finger pointing

9 Keys to Handling Hostile

and Confrontational People

Passive-Aggressive

Passive-aggressive communication style users appear

passive on the surface, but within he or she may feel
powerless or stuck, building up a resentment that leads to
seething or acting out in subtle, indirect or secret ways.

Most passive-aggressive communicators will mutter to

themselves rather than confront a person or issue. They
have difficulty acknowledging their anger, use facial
expressions that don’t correlate with how they feel and even
deny there is a problem.

Passive-aggressive communicators are most likely to

communicate with body language or a lack of open
communication to another person, such as giving someone
the silent treatment, spreading rumors behind people’s
backs or sabotaging others’ efforts. Passive-aggressive
communicators may also appear cooperative, but may
silently be doing the opposite.

Ultimately, passive-aggressive communicators are aware of

their needs, but at times struggle to voice them.

Examples of phrases that a passive-aggressive

communicator would use include:

 “That’s fine with me, but don’t be surprised if someone

else gets mad.”
 “Sure, we can do things your way” (then mutters to self
that “your way” is stupid).

The Passive-Aggressive Style

This is a style in which people appear passive on the surface, but are actually
acting out their anger in indirect or behind-the-scenes ways. Prisoners of War
often act in passive-aggressive ways in order to deal with an overwhelming
lack of power. People who behave in this manner usually feel powerless and
resentful, and express their feelings by subtly undermining the object (real or
imagined) of their resentments – even if this ends up sabotaging themselves.
The expression "Cut off your nose to spite your face" is a perfect description
of passive-aggressive behaviour.

Behavioural Characteristics

 Indirectly aggressive
 Sarcastic
 Devious
 Unreliable
 Complaining
 Sulky
 Patronising
 Gossips
 Two-faced - Pleasant to people to their faces, but poisonous behind
their backs (rumours, sabotage etc.) People do things to actively harm
the other party e.g. they sabotage a machine by loosening a bolt or put
too much salt in their food.

Non-Verbal Behaviour

 Voice – Often speaks with a sugary sweet voice.

 Posture – often asymmetrical – e.g. Standing with hand on hip, and hip
thrust out (when being sarcastic or patronising)
  Gestures – Can be jerky, quick
 Facial expression – Often looks sweet and innocent
 Spatial position – often too close, even touching other as pretends to be
warm and friendly

Language

 Passive-aggressive language is when you say something like "Why don't

you go ahead and do it; my ideas aren't very good anyway" but maybe
with a little sting of irony or even worse, sarcasm, such as "You always
know better in any case."
 "Oh don't you worry about me, I can sort myself out – like I usually have
to

People on the Receiving end Feel

 Confused
 Angry
 Hurt
 Resentful
 PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE COMMUNICATION is a style in which individuals appear passive on the
surface but are really acting out anger in a subtle, indirect, or behind-the-scenes way. People
who develop a pattern of passive-aggressive communication usually feel powerless, stuck,
and resentful – in other words, they feel incapable of dealing directly with the object of their
resentments. Instead, they express their anger by subtly undermining the object (real or
imagined) of their resentments. Passive-Aggressive communicators will often:  mutter to
themselves rather than confront the person or issue  have difficulty acknowledging their
anger  use facial expressions that don't match how they feel - i.e., smiling when angry 
use sarcasm  deny there is a problem  appear cooperative while purposely doing things
to annoy and disrupt  use subtle sabotage to get even The impact of a pattern of passive-
aggressive communication is that these individuals:  become alienated from those around
them  remain stuck in a position of powerlessness (like POWs)  discharge resentment
while real issues are never addressed so they can't mature The passive-aggressive
communicator will say, believe, or behave like:  “I’m weak and resentful, so I sabotage,
frustrate, and disrupt.”  “I’m powerless to deal with you head on so I must use guerilla
warfare.”  “I will appear cooperative but I’m not.”

Assertive

Thought to be the most effective form of communication, the

assertive communication style features an open
communication link while not being overbearing. Assertive
communicators can express their own needs, desires, ideas
and feelings, while also considering the needs of others.
Assertive communicators aim for both sides to win in a
situation, balancing one’s rights with the rights of others.
Assertive communicators can express their own needs, desires,
ideas and feelings, while also considering the needs of others.

One of the keys to assertive communication is using “I”

statements, such as “I feel frustrated when you are late for
a meeting,” or, “I don’t like having to explain this over and
over.” It indicates ownership of feelings and behaviors
without blaming the other person.

Examples of phrases an assertive communicator would use

include:

 “We are equally entitled to express ourselves

respectfully to one another.”
 “I realize I have choices in my life, and I consider my
options.”
 “I respect the rights of others.”

How to Become an Assertive Communicator

Understanding how others communicate can be key to

getting your message across to them. In order to develop a
more assertive communication style, here are a few tips to
keep in mind:

 Take ownership (use “I” statements)

 Maintain eye contact
 Learn to say “no”
 Voice your needs and desires confidently

The Assertive Style

Assertive communication is born of high self-esteem. It is the healthiest and
most effective style of communication - the sweet spot between being too
aggressive and too passive. When we are assertive, we have the confidence
to communicate without resorting to games or manipulation. We know our
limits and don't allow ourselves to be pushed beyond them just because
someone else wants or needs something from us. Surprisingly, however,
Assertive is the style most people use least.

Behavioural Characteristics

o Achieving goals without hurting others

o Protective of own rights and respectful of others' rights
o Socially and emotionally expressive
o Making your own choices and taking responsibility for them
o Asking directly for needs to be met, while accepting the possibility of
rejection
o Accepting compliments

Non-Verbal Behaviour

o Voice – medium pitch and speed and volume

o Posture – open posture, symmetrical balance, tall, relaxed, no fidgeting
o Gestures – even, rounded, expansive
o Facial expression – good eye contact
o Spatial position – in control, respectful of others

Language

o "Please would you turn the volume down? I am really struggling to

concentrate on my studies."
o "I am so sorry, but I won't be able to help you with your project this
afternoon, as I have a dentist appointment."

People on the Receiving end Feel

o They can take the person at their word

o They know where they stand with the person
o The person can cope with justified criticism and accept compliments
o The person can look after themselves
o Respect for the person
ASSERTIVE COMMUNICATION is a style in which individuals clearly state their opinions
and feelings, and firmly advocate for their rights and needs without violating the rights of
others. These individuals value themselves, their time, and their emotional, spiritual, and
physical needs and are strong advocates for themselves while being very respectful of the
rights of others. Assertive communicators will:  state needs and wants clearly,
appropriately, and respectfully  express feelings clearly, appropriately, and respectfully 
use “I” statements  communicate respect for others  listen well without interrupting  feel
in control of self  have good eye contact  speak in a calm and clear tone of voice  have a
relaxed body posture  feel connected to others  feel competent and in control  not allow
others to abuse or manipulate them  stand up for their rights The impact of a pattern of
assertive communication is that these individuals:  feel connected to others  feel in control
of their lives  are able to mature because they address issues and problems as they arise 
create a respectful environment for others to grow and mature The assertive communicator
will say, believe, or behave in a way that says:  “We are equally entitled to express
ourselves respectfully to one another.”  “I am confident about who I am.”  “I realize I
have choices in my life and I consider my options.”  “I speak clearly, honestly, and to the
point.”  “I can’t control others but I can control myself.”  “I place a high priority on
having my rights respected.”  “I am responsible for getting my needs met in a respectful
manner.”  “I respect the rights of others.”  “Nobody owes me anything unless they’ve
agreed to give it to me.”  “I’m 100% responsible for my own happiness.” Assertiveness
allows us to take care of ourselves, and is fundamental for good mental health and healthy
relationships

The Aggressive Style

This style is about winning – often at someone else's expense. An aggressive
person behaves as if their needs are the most important, as though they have
more rights, and have more to contribute than other people. It is an
ineffective communication style as the content of the message may get lost
because people are too busy reacting to the way it's delivered.

Behavioural Characteristics

o Frightening, threatening, loud, hostile

o Willing to achieve goals at expense of others
o Out to "win"
o Demanding, abrasive
o Belligerent
o Explosive, unpredictable
o Intimidating
o Bullying

Non-Verbal Behaviour

o Voice – volume is loud

o Posture – 'bigger than' others
o Gestures - big, fast, sharp/jerky
o Facial expression – scowl, frown, glare
o Spatial position - Invade others' personal space, try to stand 'over' others

Language

o "You are crazy!"

o "Do it my way!"
o "You make me sick!"
o "That is just about enough out of you!"
o Sarcasm, name-calling, threatening, blaming, insulting.

People on the Receiving end Feel

o Defensive, aggressive (withdraw or fight back)

o Uncooperative
o Resentful/Vengeful
o Humiliated/degraded
o Hurt
o Afraid
o A loss of respect for the aggressive person
o Mistakes and problems are not reported to an aggressive person in case
they "blow up'. Others are afraid of being railroaded, exploited or
humiliated.
o AGGRESSIVE COMMUNICATION is a style in which individuals express their feelings and opinions
and advocate for their needs in a way that violates the rights of others. Thus, aggressive
communicators are verbally and/or physically abusive. Aggressive communicators will often: 
try to dominate others  use humiliation to control others  criticize, blame, or attack others 
be very impulsive  have low frustration tolerance  speak in a loud, demanding, and
overbearing voice  act threateningly and rudely  not listen well  interrupt frequently  use
“you” statements This resource is provided by the UK Violence Intervention and Prevention
Center  have an overbearing or intimidating posture The impact of a pattern of aggressive
communication is that these individuals:  become alienated from others  alienate others 
generate fear and hatred in others  always blame others instead of owning their issues, and
thus are unable to mature The aggressive communicator will say, believe, or behave like:  “I’m
superior and right and you’re inferior and wrong.”  “I’m loud, bossy and pushy.”  “I can
dominate and intimidate you.”  “I can violate your rights.”  “I’ll get my way no matter what.”
 “You’re not worth anything.”  “It’s all your fault.”  “I react instantly.”  “I’m entitled.” 
“You owe me.”  “I own you.”

1. PASSIVE COMMUNICATION is a style in which individuals have developed a pattern of avoiding

expressing their opinions or feelings, protecting their rights, and identifying and meeting their needs.
As a result, passive individuals do not respond overtly to hurtful or anger-inducing situations.
Instead, they allow grievances and annoyances to mount, usually unaware of the buildup. But once
they have reached their high tolerance threshold for unacceptable behavior, they are prone to
explosive outbursts, which are usually out of proportion to the triggering incident. After the
outburst, however, they may feel shame, guilt, and confusion, so they return to being passive.
Passive communicators will often:  fail to assert for themselves  allow others to deliberately or
inadvertently infringe on their rights  fail to express their feelings, needs, or opinions  tend to
speak softly or apologetically  exhibit poor eye contact and slumped body posture The impact of a
pattern of passive communication is that these individuals:  often feel anxious because life seems
out of their control  often feel depressed because they feel stuck and hopeless  often feel
resentful (but are unaware of it) because their needs are not being met  often feel confused
because they ignore their own feelings  are unable to mature because real issues are never
addressed A passive communicator will say, believe, or behave like:  “I’m unable to stand up for
my rights.”  “I don’t know what my rights are.”  “I get stepped on by everyone."  “I’m weak and
unable to take care of myself.”  “People never consider my feelings.”