My mother at Sixty-six
09-01-2025
- Kamala Das
Overview
My Mother at Sixty-Six” is a poem by Kamala Das that explores the bond between a mother and her
daughter, the process of aging, and the fear of losing loved ones
Theme:
The poem explores the universal theme of the mortality of loved ones
It also explores the difficulty children face when their parents age
Content:
The poem describes the poet's feelings of love, fear, and sadness as she sees her mother's aging
The poet describes her mother's pale face, which reminds her of death and fragility
The poet contrasts her mother's appearance with the lively scenes outside the car, which symbolize
life and youth
The poet tries to hide her fear of losing her mother by forcing a smile when saying goodbye
Enduring Understanding
Ageing and Mortality: Life is transient, and ageing is an inevitable process that evokes emotions of love,
loss, and helplessness.
Parent-Child Relationship: The bond between a parent and child is deeply emotional, marked by a blend of
love, fear of separation, and the desire to hold onto precious moments.
Human Resilience: People often mask their grief and fears with smiles and composure, reflecting their
strength to endure the emotional pain of life’s realities.
Contrasts of Life: The juxtaposition of vitality (e.g., children playing, trees sprinting) with stillness (the
mother’s frailty) underscores the dualities of life – youth and ageing, life and death, joy and sorrow.
Universal Experience: The poem encapsulates a universal human experience – the inevitable separation
from loved ones and the emotional turmoil it brings, making it relatable across cultures and generations.
Essential Vocabulary
1. Doze: A light sleep or nap, symbolising the mother’s fragility and weariness.
2. Pale: Lacking colour, reflecting the mother’s aged and lifeless appearance.
3. Ashen: Greyish-white, a simile for the mother’s face, likened to a corpse, emphasising her fragility.
4. Corpse: A dead body, used metaphorically to describe the mother’s pallor and evoke a sense of mortality.
5. ashen like a corpse means a pale and greyish face that has lost its colour.
6. Sprinting: Running at full speed, contrasting the vitality of youth with the stillness of ageing.
7. Merry: Joyful and happy, used to describe the vibrant children playing, creating a stark contrast to the poet’s
sombre emotions.
8. Spilling: Overflowing, symbolic of vitality (energetic) and liveliness in the scene outside the car.
9. Familiar ache: A known or recurring pain, indicating the poet’s deep emotional anguish at the thought of
separation and mortality.
10. Smile, smile, smile: Repetition used to signify the poet’s attempt to mask her pain and reassure her mother
despite her inner turmoil.
Essential Questions
1. How does the poet depict the theme of ageing and mortality in the poem?
2. What emotions does the poet experience while observing her mother, and how are these conveyed through
imagery?
3. How does the contrast between the mother’s condition and the external world (e.g., children playing and trees
sprinting) enhance the poem’s message?
4. What is the significance of the phrase "familiar ache" in expressing the poet’s feelings?
5. How does the poet use repetition and other literary devices to emphasise her emotions and the inevitability of
separation?
6. In what ways does the poet’s reaction at the end ("Smile, smile, smile") reveal her coping mechanism for dealing
with her fears?
7. How does the universal theme of human relationships and the fear of losing loved ones resonate with readers?
8. Why does the poet compare her mother’s face to that of a corpse, and what impact does this have on the reader?
9. How does the poem explore the tension between personal emotions and societal expectations (e.g., suppressing
grief in public)?
10. What role does the setting (car journey, airport) play in shaping the mood and tone of the poem?
Central Theme:
Aging and Mortality
Main Elements:
1. Setting
o Car journey with mother
o Observation of mother’s frailty
o Airport parting scene
2. Emotions
o Love and concern for mother
o Fear of separation and loss
o Inner turmoil masked by a smile
3. Imagery
o Mother’s pale face: Compared to a corpse, symbolizing mortality
o Merry children playing: Contrasts vitality of youth with aging
o Trees sprinting: Symbol of life’s passage and fleeting time
4. Repetition
o "Smile, smile, smile"
o Reflects the poet’s attempt to cope with her emotions
5. Symbols
o Mother’s face: Frailty and inevitability of death
o Children and trees: The vibrancy and continuity of life
6. Contrast
o Youth vs. Old age: Vibrant children vs. aging mother
o Movement vs. Stillness: Sprinting trees vs. passive mother
7. Universal Themes
o Parent-child relationship
o Fear of mortality and separation
o Acceptance of life’s transient nature
Questions and Answers
1. What was the childhood fear that now troubled the poet?
A: The childhood fear that troubled the poet was the fear of losing her mother. As a
child, she likely experienced the natural fear of separation from her parent, a common
anxiety that stems from the deep emotional bond between a child and their caregiver.
Now, as an adult, this fear resurfaces with greater intensity as she observes her
mother’s frail and ageing appearance, which brings the reality of mortality closer. The
poet is deeply troubled by the thought that her mother may not be with her for much
longer, making her childhood fear of separation and loss all the more poignant and
immediate. This reflects the universal dread of losing loved ones, a fear that lingers
and evolves with time.
2. What do the poet’s parting words suggest?
A: The poet’s parting words, “See you soon, Amma,” suggest a mix of hope,
reassurance, and denial. These words of assurance and her smile provide a stark
contrast to the old familiar fear of childhood. She expresses her desire to meet her
mother again, clinging to the possibility of their reunion despite the looming fear of
mortality. It reflects her struggle to confront the harsh reality of ageing and death, as
she tries to suppress her deep fears and cling to optimism. She is trying to hide her
fear about her mother’s frail and deteriorating health which might separate her from
her mother.
3. Why did Kamala Das add the image of merry children to her poem?
A: Kamala Das adds the image of merry children to symbolize the vitality, energy, and
joy of youth. This image serves as a stark contrast to the frailty and ageing of the
poet’s mother, who embodies the inevitable decay associated with old age. The
children’s spontaneous outpouring of life highlights the cycle of life, emphasising the
vibrancy of youth in contrast to the stillness and passivity of old age. This
juxtaposition deepens the reader’s understanding of the transient nature of life and
the inevitability of ageing.
