Professional Interpersonal Skills for Nurses 1st
edition by Carolyn Kagan 0412441004
978-0412441004 pdf download
https://ebookball.com/product/professional-interpersonal-skills-
for-nurses-1st-edition-by-carolyn-
kagan-0412441004-978-0412441004-25866/
Explore and download more ebooks or textbooks
at ebookball.com
We have selected some products that you may be interested in
Click the link to download now or visit ebookball.com
for more options!.
Professional Interpersonal Skills for Nurses 1st edition
by Carolyn Kagan 0412441004 978-0412441004
https://ebookball.com/product/professional-interpersonal-skills-for-
nurses-1st-edition-by-carolyn-kagan-0412441004-978-0412441004-25866/
Communication and Interpersonal Skills for Nurses 1st
Edition by Alec Grant, Shirley Bach ISBN 1844451623
9781844451623
https://ebookball.com/product/communication-and-interpersonal-skills-
for-nurses-1st-edition-by-alec-grant-shirley-bach-
isbn-1844451623-9781844451623-730/
Nutrition A Handbook for Nurses 1st edition by Carolyn
Best 9780470699737 0470699736
https://ebookball.com/product/nutrition-a-handbook-for-nurses-1st-
edition-by-carolyn-best-9780470699737-0470699736-1312/
Minor Surgical Procedures for Nurses and Allied Healthcare
Professional 1st Edition by Shirley Martin 0470019905
9780470019900
https://ebookball.com/product/minor-surgical-procedures-for-nurses-
and-allied-healthcare-professional-1st-edition-by-shirley-
martin-0470019905-9780470019900-1424/
Communication Skills Stepladders to Success for the
Professional 2nd edition by Richard Ellis ISBN 1841502984
9781841502984
https://ebookball.com/product/communication-skills-stepladders-to-
success-for-the-professional-2nd-edition-by-richard-ellis-
isbn-1841502984-9781841502984-18266/
Pharmacology for Nurses 2nd edition by Blaine Smith, Diane
Pacitti ISBN 1284141985 978-1284141986
https://ebookball.com/product/pharmacology-for-nurses-2nd-edition-by-
blaine-smith-diane-pacitti-isbn-1284141985-978-1284141986-4002/
Blackwell Handbook of Social Psychology Interpersonal
Processes Interpersonal Processes 1st Edition by Garth
Fletcher, Margaret Clark 0631212299 9780631212294
https://ebookball.com/product/blackwell-handbook-of-social-psychology-
interpersonal-processes-interpersonal-processes-1st-edition-by-garth-
fletcher-margaret-clark-0631212299-9780631212294-19320/
Public Health Nursing A Textbook for Health Visitors
School Nurses and Occupational Health Nurses 1st Edition
by Greta Thornbory ISBN 1405180072 9781405180078
https://ebookball.com/product/public-health-nursing-a-textbook-for-
health-visitors-school-nurses-and-occupational-health-nurses-1st-
edition-by-greta-thornbory-isbn-1405180072-9781405180078-656/
Developing Masterful Management Skills for International
Business 1st edition by Thomas Cook ISBN B08LGP1RZD
978-1482226102
https://ebookball.com/product/developing-masterful-management-skills-
for-international-business-1st-edition-by-thomas-cook-
isbn-b08lgp1rzd-978-1482226102-24544/
Professional Interpersonal Skills
for Nurses
Professional Interpersonal
Skills for Nurses
Carolyn Kagan
Lecturer at Manchester Metropolitan University, UK, and works with
North Western Training and Development Team, UK
Josie Evans
Huddersfield University, UK
and South Manchester Health Authority, UK
SPRINGER-SCIENCE+BUSINESS MEDIA, B.V.
First published in 1986 as A Manual of Interpersonal Skills for Nurses. An
experiential approach.
This edition 1995
© 1995 Carolyn Kagan and Josie Evans
Originally published by Chapman & Hall in 1995
This edition not for sale in North America and Australia; orders from these
regions should be referred to Singular Publishing Group, Inc., 4284 41st Street,
San Diego, CA92105, USA
Typeset in 10/12pt Palatino by Best-set Typesetter Ltd, Hong Kong
ISBN 978-0-412-44100-4 ISBN 978-1-4899-4463-4 (eBook)
DOI 10.1007/978-1-4899-4463-4
Apart from any fair dealing for the purposes of research or private study, or
criticism or review, as permitted under the UK Copyright Designs and Patents
Act, 1988, this publication may not be reproduced, stored, or transmitted, in any
form or by any means, without the prior permission in writing of the publishers,
or in the case of reprographic reproduction only in accordance with the terms of
the licences issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency in the UK, or in
accordance with the terms of licences issued by the appropriate Reproduction
Rights Organization outside the UK. Enquiries concerning reproduction outside
the terms stated here should be sent to the publishers at the London address
printed on this page.
The publisher makes no representation, express or implied, with regard to the
accuracy of the information contained in this book and cannot accept any legal
responsibility or liability for any errors or omissions that may be made.
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
(Ç9 Printed on permanent acid-free text paper, manufactured in accordance with
ANSI/NISO Z39.48-1992 and ANSI/NISO Z39.48-1984 (Permanence of Paper)
For Mark
Contents
Preface x
1 Introduction 1
A model of interpersonal skill 4
2 Self and self-awareness 6
Personal identity 7
Internal events 9
External events 15
Sense of self as 'agent' 19
The process of becoming self-aware 22
Summary 23
Self-development exercises 24
3 Social behaviour 26
Non-verbal behaviour 26
Speech 30
Summary 40
Self-development exercises 41
4 Social perception 43
Labelling 45
Stereotypes 46
Implicit personality theories 47
Consistency 48
Personal relevance 49
Constructive and reconstructive social perception 49
Summary 50
Self-development exercises 52
5 Social problem solving (1) 55
The social problem-solving process 55
Attitudes 58
Persuasion 64
Summary 67
Self-development exercises 68
V111 Contents
6 Social routines 71
Social roles 71
Norms and social rules 76
Social ritual 77
Functions of social routines 83
Transactional analysis 83
Summary 87
Self-development exercises 88
7 Facilitation and the development of rapport 90
Rapport 90
The recognition and expression of emotion 91
Recognition and expression of interpersonal attitudes 95
The communication of understanding 98
Self-disclosure 101
Summary 103
Self-development exercises 104
8 Influence and assertion 106
Control and social interaction 106
Questions and interpersonal control 107
Reassurance, information and explanation 116
Assertiveness 119
Negotiation and compromise 125
Summary 126
Self-development exercises 127
9 Counselling 129
The counselling approach 129
The counselling process 131
Summary 144
Self-development exercises 146
10 Conflict, aggression and violence 149
Handling conflict 149
Aggression and violence 154
Summary 158
Self-development exercises 159
11 Social problem solving (2) 162
Breaking bad news 162
Managing change 167
Summary 170
Self-development exercises 172
Contents ix
12 Working with groups 175
The nature of groups 175
Communication in and between groups 176
Roles 179
Leadership 180
Power 181
Team development 184
Multidisciplinary teamwork 185
Summary 187
Self-development exercises 188
13 Supervision and appraisal 190
The nature of supervision 191
Developmental approach to supervision 191
Styles of supervision 192
Proactive approach to supervision 195
Enhancing motivation and feedback 197
Personal objectives for change 201
Appraisal and performance review 203
Summary 204
Self-development exercises 206
14 Handling pressure 207
The nature of stress 207
Interpersonal skills and stress 210
Stressors in nursing 210
Summary 220
Self-development exercises 222
15 Constraints on using effective interpersonal skills 224
Personal constraints 224
Social constraints 228
Roles 228
Environmental constraints 232
Cultural constraints 236
Summary 241
Self-development exercises 243
References 245
Further reading 260
Index 262
Preface
This book is a sequel to an earlier book A Manual of Interpersonal Skills
for Nurses: An Experiential Approach written by Carolyn Kagan, Josie
Evans and Betty Kay in 1986. At that time interpersonal skills was
relatively new to nursing curricula, and all nurse basic and post-basic
training syllabi contained some aspects of interpersonal skills. Teachers
were also new to the area and many were anxious about how they
were to introduce experientially based interpersonal skills learning into
their courses.
Since that time, nurse education has changed. Project 2000 has been
introduced and post-basic training courses have been integrated with
higher education. Schools of nursing have combined to form colleges of
health in partnership with, or with courses accredited by, institutions
of higher education. There has been a shift from experiential exploration
of interpersonal skills to the need for an academic understanding of
material underpinning interpersonal skill in nursing.
The Health Service, too, has changed. Steadily and unrelentingly
throughout the 1980s, health service management and organization has
changed. The roles of patients and other consumers of health care have
been evolving. Purchaser/provider splits have permeated acute and
long-term sectors in hospital, and community and primary care. Trusts
have emerged, nurses have been regraded and it is highly unlikely that
any nurse is doing the same job, in the same kind of health service, as
slhe was doing in 1986. Indeed, in 1994 there is a far greater range of
employers of nurses than there was in 1986, with the rapid growth of
the independent health care sector.
All of these changes mean that there are new demands being made
on nurses in their use of interpersonal skills, and we have incorporated
discussion of many of these into this book. So, there are totally new
sections on handling pressure, working with groups, managing change,
handling conflict, aggression and violence, and supervision, appraisal
and performance review. Some sections remain much as they were in
the earlier book, as we remain convinced that they form the basis of
professional interpersonal skills in nursing. Familiar sections making a
reappearance are those fOCUSing on self-awareness; fundamental inter-
personal processes (speech, non-verbal behaviour, social perception);
Preface xi
rapport and facilitation; counselling; social problem solving; and con-
straints on the effective use of interpersonal skills.
Throughout, reference to the parent disciplines of social psychology
and to the nursing literature have been incorporated. Details of experi-
ential exercises and their management in the classroom have been
omitted - these are still to be found in the 1986 book. Each chapter has
some self-development exercises. We think we have made these up;
however it is in the nature of interpersonal skills development exercises
that sometimes people think particular exercises should have been
attributed to them. We apologize if we have omitted to acknowledge
anyone's work or ideas.
Two features have been retained but appear in different forms.
Illustrations from real nursing situations are clearly marked in boxes.
These include illustrations from a far wider range of nursing situations,
including community (district nursing, learning disability and psy-
chiatric nursing, school nursing and practice nursing) and hospital
episodes. All the examples we have used have been witnessed directly
or indirectly: none of them are fiction. We have also drawn attention to
areas of controversy, dealt with inadequately by the literature, but
central to nursing practice. Thus, questions are raised in 'Food for
Thought' boxes.
We hope the book meets contemporary needs for the continuing
development of professional interpersonal skills in nursing.
Since writing the earlier book, we too have undergone change.
Carolyn is a social worker who works as a lecturer in social psychology
at what is now the Manchester Metropolitan University. Since 1987 she
has been seconded to work part-time with the North Western Training
and Development Team. This is a small multidisciplinary team of two
full-time equivalent people, offering consultancy to health and social
services for people with learning disabilities in the North Western
Region (19 health districts, 11 social service authorities and an increas-
ing number of health trusts and GP fundholders). She works at the
interface of interpersonal and profeSSional development, organizational
change and user empowerment. Josie has moved to a joint post with
Huddersfield University and South Manchester Health Authority, run-
ning a satellite Diploma in Nursing course in the Authority, as part of
the professional nursing development programme. She is currently
researching the contribution continuing professional development
makes to the quality of nursing care, and patients' perceptions of
'comfort'.
Betty Kay, who contributed to the earlier book, has been unable to
write this one. Her commitments have meant that she has, regrettably,
been unable to continue beyond the initial stages. However, we remain
indebted to her for her continued interest, support and sense of
humour.
XlI Preface
The writing of the book has detracted from family life as, despite
exhortations from the Higher Education sector urging staff to publish,
few resources are provided to enable books to be produced. So it has
been written at weekends and evenings alongside massive increases in
our workloads in both universities and in the field.
Carolyn would like to thank Mark Burton, Amy Kagan and Anna
Kagan for their tolerance and acceptance that the book did, indeed,
have to be finished. Anna deserves special mention for keeping
her desk tidy and making it available. It is the only table surface in
Carolyn's house that is reliably clear. Amy deserves special mention for
the continual supply of herb teas throughout days devoted to writing.
Mark deserves special mention for cooking, help with the intricacies of
the computer, as well as for listening, even though he too has had
writing deadlines to meet - and miss.
Josie would like to thank family and friends for their continuing
support and encouragement.
We are grateful for the typing assistance given by Pauline Mook and
Pauline Stevens and for the support and friendship of colleagues,
especially Sue Lewis and Mildred Austin.
While we have been preparing the manuscript our publishers have
changed twice. Lisa Fraley has proved to be a supportive and tolerant
editor at Chapman & Hall, as deadline after deadline has been passed.
We appreciate the lack of pressure put upon us as we have struggled to
meet competing demands from our different strands of work.
Carolyn Kagan and Josie Evans,
1993, Manchester
CHAPTER 1
Introduction
In this introduction we intend to set out key features of our approach
to professional interpersonal skills in nursing. We do not propose a
literature review of the field (indeed, in many ways the rest of the book
provides this) but will clarify those assumptions that underlie our
observations and discussions.
Our approach to professional interpersonal skills in nursing is one
that goes beyond theories and models of communication or social
skills. It is one that is firmly grounded in the social psychology of
interpersonal and social behaviour and experience. Furthermore, it
takes for granted the interdependence of interpersonal experience,
behaviour, role and context. What may be professionally skilled in
one interpersonal situation may not be in another. What may be pro-
fessionally skilled on the part of one nurse may not be on the part of
another. The keys to professional interpersonal skills in nursing are
flexibility and understanding.
'Interpersonal skills refer to those interpersonal aspects of com-
munication and social skills that people [need to] use in direct person-
to-person contact' (Kagan, Evans and Kay, 1986, p. 1). Professional
interpersonal skills in nursing refer to those particular interpersonal
skills nurses have to employ to be effective practitioners, managers or
teachers. These professional interpersonal skills can be used when
working with patients, patients' relatives, colleagues, other health and
welfare practitioners and students. They may be employed in one-to-
one, small group or large group encounters. They are not simply those
personal qualities nurses bring to their work and their lives. Instead
they are the purposive social acts that nurses display at work, while
nursing (in its broadest sense). It is the use of such interpersonal skills
in the process of nursing that makes them professional interpersonal
skills.
Professional interpersonal skills require flexible adaptation to chang-
ing circumstances and different people in a range of different situations,
in pursuit of clear nursing goals. A number of assumptions stem from
this broad definition and underpin the skills approach to nurses' inter-
personal transactions outlined in this book.
2 Introduction
• Firstly, professional interpersonal behaviour in nursing is learnt.
Nurses bring with them their prior learning (and sometimes mis-
learning) of interpersonal skills and develop these as they learn, and
become experienced in, nursing.
• Secondly, interpersonal behaviour can be broken down into
component parts, each of which can be identified, practised and
combined with others to improve overall levels of professional com-
petence in different nursing settings.
• Thirdly, professional interpersonal behaviour is made up of cognitive
and emotional components as well as behavioural ones.
• Fourthly, complex interpersonal behaviour is underpinned by
fundamental elements which combine in different ways for different
professional interpersonal skills.
• Lastly, effective deployment of professional interpersonal behaviour
may be weakened or prevented by both internal and external con-
straints: motivation and ability are necessary but not sufficient
preconditions to effective professional interpersonal behaviour.
So, a skills perspective on professional interpersonal skills in nursing
encourages a look beyond the personal qualities of individual nurses
in order to understand the interpersonal nature of nursing. It is also
necessary to understand some of the social psychological processes
underpinning interpersonal aspects of nursing in order to know what
is required in the development of professional interpersonal skills.
Understanding the self, communication, social cognition attitude
formation and change, and group dynamics can all help nurses become
more effective in some of the complex interaction settings within which
they work.
The essence of nursing is interpersonal contact. Nurses do things for
and with other people. To do this effectively they need, therefore, to
be interpersonally skilled. They need to have command of fundamental
interpersonal skills and be able to combine these to form complex and
professional interpersonal skills. While these skills are relevant to all
the caring and people-focused professions, nurses do have unique
situations in which they must exercise their skills. Professional inter-
personal skills are not, then, confined to nurses, but the uses to which
they are put in nursing are indeed special.
Kagan, Evans and Kay (1986) argued that there are four levels at
which interpersonal skills in nursing should be considered. These levels
are illustrated in Figure 1.1.
At the very least, nurses should gain insight into their own inter-
personal skills and why they might not be using them as effectively
as they could at work. This insight will help them achieve greater
flexibility in the use of interpersonal skills. Most nurses will need to
develop some specialist skills and extend their existing skills to new
Introduction 3
Overcome constraints on
the effective use of
interpersonal skill
Strategic use of particular
interpersonal strategies
Development of specialist interpersonal skill
Insight into self and others
Figure 1.1 Levels of interpersonal skills.
nursing settings. To be able to adapt to new and unpredictable events,
nurses must become strategic in their use of specific interpersonal
strategies for particular purposes. Finally, nurses need to be able to
identify and overcome both internal and external constraints to the
effective use of interpersonal skills. The professional use of interper-
sonal skills requires consideration of all four levels and the return to
each level over time. Thus, for example, personal insight is never
finished; it may be returned to once specialist skills have been acquired,
strategies clarified or constraints overcome.
Nurses will always be able to improve their interpersonal skill,
at each level, however skilled they are at any point in time. It is
the insight into, evaluation of and ability to change their own inter-
personal behaviour that will enable nurses to enhance their professional
practice.
There are a number of other assumptions underlying the approach to
professional interpersonal skills adopted in this book stemming from
Kagan, Evans and Kay (1986).
1. Self-awareness is central to professional interpersonal skill.
2. The understanding, evaluation and change of interpersonal strat-
egies is fundamental to professional interpersonal skill.
3. Some specialist professional interpersonal skills for nursing can be
identified and taught.
4. The development of effective professional interpersonal skill is a
continuing process, not an end point.
5. Professional interpersonal skills take place in social contexts which
may inhibit their effective use.
4 Introduction
CULruRAL CONTEXT
g
I/)
.~
1ii ~ .>t:. ~.
E "E c:
m
CD
=1\1 I!! £; c;.. 5. Z
CD -0 l 2"
t< CD
1ii
·c
~
"C "C
iii
"C
c:
el
~
::J]
0
~
I/)
CIS 2
l
0)
z ~ c
:s iD
_(J)
Z
3:
0 Q.
Q.
0 a m
U 1\1 "C iD Z
'0 oS
~
(J)
~
CD III ~
Z 0)
-g :c ~ :::l
Q. r-
0 3: (')
en ~c
1\1
C
0
a: III
iii Z
UJ
rtf
~
11.
><
~
impact and
consequences
SOCIAL CONTEXT
Figure 1.2 A model of interpersonal skill.
A MODEL OF INTERPERSONAL SKILL
Interpersonal skills are complex and are made up of different elements.
They operate within personal, social, environmental and cultural con-
texts. Figure 1.2 illustrates a simple model.
More detailed models, incorporating the same assumptions, can be
found in Kagan (1985) and Kagan, Evans and Kay (1986).
In the book we cover the fundamental processes of interpersonal
skill, including self-awareness, social behaviour (language and non-
verbal behaviour), social perception and social problem solving. We go
Random documents with unrelated
content Scribd suggests to you:
through the lines to the table at the end, upon which the last players
place it. Meanwhile, of course, the first players are sending other
pins down the rows.
The line that succeeds in removing all the pins in the heap from
one table to the other in the shortest time wins the game. The fun
lies in the awkward manipulation of one’s neighbor’s hand. Should a
pin be dropped in the process, it must be picked up by the umpire
and returned to the top table, and throughout the game the wrists
must be kept crossed.
Proverbs
One of the party retires while the rest decide upon a well-known
proverb. When he returns, he stands in the center of a semicircle.
Some one taps three times with a stick, and at the third tap each
player shouts one word of the proverb loudly and simultaneously.
This is repeated three times, and it is amazing how difficult it is to
distinguish even the most well-known proverb in the uproar.
Should one word give the key to the player not in the secret, the
individual who speaks it takes his place. For instance, in the proverb,
“All is not gold that glitters,” it may happen that the word “glitters”
provides the keynote. Therefore, he or she who speaks it takes the
place of the one who guesses.
The proverb must contain as many words as there are players,
and each shouts only the one word allotted to him.
The Game of Shadows
A white sheet is stretched against the wall, with a lamp
immediately before it. All other lights are extinguished. One of the
company sits on a chair or stool with eyes fixed on the sheet. Behind
him the company files noiselessly, the while he endeavors to identify
them by means of the shadows silhouetted on the screen.
Simple disguises are allowable and increase the fun. For example,
a boy may don a girl’s hat, a girl a boy’s; or a skirt or shawl may be
draped over a boy’s suit, thus concealing the wearer’s identity. The
one whose shadow betrays her takes the place of the player who
identifies her.
Gardeners
Two rows, headed by a chosen captain, face each other. In turn
they fire at each other the names of vegetable, flowers, or fruit,
beginning with the letter A, and using in turn the other letters of the
alphabet—asparagus, artichokes, apples, &c.
The players on each side set their wits to work to aid their captain
when he shows signs of faltering. They are not allowed to speak
aloud, their promptings being given in whispers, and this is where
the fun comes in, for, when one is excited and eager to give a word,
it is very difficult to remember to whisper, especially when placed at
the tail of the line.
When a gardener and his side pause to remember a word the
opposite side counts twenty slowly; if at the end of that time their
opponents still fail they forfeit a man. The game goes on until one
captain has secured all his adversaries’ followers. Should any one
except the leaders speak aloud, he or she is obliged to cross to the
other party.
When a captain surrenders he is obliged to go to the end of the
line, and the next man takes his place and responsibilities. Wild
flowers or plants are not allowed.
Tidings
Each player adopts some trade or profession. One member reads
out the social gossip from a daily paper. When he pauses and points
at one of the rest, that one must reply quickly some sentence
regarding his calling or the stock he sells, for instance—
Reader.—The ball that took place at the residence of the Hon. Mrs.
Mortimer last evening was distinguished by the presence of the
President.
A number of débutantes were present, the majority of whom were
dressed in—Here the reader glances at the carpenter, who answers,
“Shavings.”
Reader—“Their headgear consisted of (glances at the fruiterer)—
Fruiterer—“Pine-apples.”
Reader—“Their jewels were necklaces (glances at the
ironmonger)—
Ironmonger—“Of nails.”
Reader—“The dancing took place in—
Tobacconist—“A cigar box.”
Reader—“The walls of which were richly decorated with—
Lawyer—“Red tape.”
Reader—“The band was composed of forty instruments all—
Doctor—“Medicine bottles.”
Reader—“The President’s first partner was—
Fishmonger—“A codfish.”
Reader—“Who was most becomingly clad in—
Druggist—“Silver scales.”
Reader—“Her bouquet was composed of—
Dry Goods Merchant—“Spools of cotton.”
Reader—“And her tiny feet were cased in—
Mason—“Bricks.”
Reader—“Her dancing was as light as—
Plumber—“A gas escape.”
Reader—“And her charming smiles showed to view a perfect set
of—
Bootmaker—“Black heels.”
It can be imagined from this example the merriment and laughter
similar answers evoke.
The Lawyer
The party is divided into two rows, through which walks the
lawyer. He asks a number of questions, and the answers may
contain any words except “yes,” “no,” “white,” “black.”
The person to whom he puts his query does not reply, but the one
immediately opposite does.
The lawyer exchanges places with the one who makes the first
mistake.
An Example
Lawyer (pointing to Mary)—“Your hair is very long; is it your
own?”
Tom opposite bawls “false.”
To Jessie—“Do these pretty boots pinch your feet?”
Jack—“Of course, they are two sizes too small.”
To John—“Did you use your razor this morning?”
Jane—“He hasn’t any hair to cut.”
To Timothy—“Is your nurse waiting to put you to bed?”
Elsie—“Naturally—he goes to bed at seven.”
To Dick—“What would you like on your next birthday?”
Ethel—“A rattle.”
To James—“What is your favorite pastime?”
Alice—“Putting dolly to bed.”
To Freda—“What is the color of your face?”
Andrew (afraid to say “white” for fear of forfeit)—“Green.”
Cabbages
Any number of players can take part in this game. They kneel in a
circle on the floor with fingers stretched out before them and
thumbs tucked in.
The game is started by the leader’s query to her neighbor: “Can
you play cabbages?”
As the latter has not been initiated into the mysteries of the game,
she at once replies—
“No.”
The question is asked by each player, and is always answered in
the negative until the circle is completed, when the leader again
queries:
“Can you play cabbages?”
Neighbor—“No.”
Leader (suddenly)—“Then why on earth are we sitting here?”
The blank expressions which result in this query are ludicrous in
the extreme, and are followed by bursts of merriment.
The Lover’s Coming
All the members of the party save one are massed together at the
end of the room. The leader walks close to them, and throws a light
rubber ball towards any person she likes.
The person must be prepared to catch the ball. As the leader
throws it, she accompanies the action with these words, “My lover
comes thus”—the ball is tossed in a way to illustrate the manner of
the supposed lover. The thrower terminates her sentence by a letter
of the alphabet. The one to whom the ball is thrown has to provide
an adjective beginning with the given letter as she catches the ball—
thus:
Leader—“My lover comes g”—(throws ball).
Catcher—“Gayly”—(tosses ball back).
Leader—“My lover comes h.”
Catcher—“Hopping.”
Leader—“My lover comes o.”
Catcher—“One-eyed.”
Leader—“My lover comes s.”
Catcher—“Smirking.”
Excitement is caused by the difficulty in producing a word at a
moment’s notice, and being ready to catch the ball at the same time.
Telegrams
Each player is provided with paper and pencil, upon which any
twelve letters are written, with sufficient space left between for
words.
The leader gives a topic, such as a wedding, accident, invitation,
&c. A watch is placed on the table, and from ten to fifteen minutes
given, during which each player concocts a telegram from the letters
supplied by his left-hand neighbor.
At a signal, the telegrams are thrust under a hat, and read out in
turn by the leader.
Example 1.—Topic: a sensational robbery.
S. B. O. B.
H. M. J. P.
K. I. P. H.
From these letters may be devised the following telegram:—
“Serious burglary; one box hairpins missing. Jane prostrate; kindly
inform police—Henry.”
Example 2.—Topic: a catastrophe.
C. A. S. D.
P. B. C. A.
B. Q. D. W.
“Cat ate Sunday dinner. Please bring cheese and bread; quite
distracted—Wifie.”
The funnier the telegram, the greater the laughter when it is read
out.
The Fan Fight
The players divide into two lines. A piece of tape is stretched
across the room, and before every two players a feather is placed.
Each player possesses a Japanese fan, and the object is to lift the
feather and waft it on to a stretch of newspaper, which marks the
opponents’ den.
The dens are guarded by goal-keepers, also armed with fans, and
their business is a lively one.
Feathers must not be blown, or pushed with the hand, as happens
sometimes when the excitement of the game makes one forgetful of
all else but the threatening direction the feather is taking. Only the
fan is to be used.
The feathers should be of different colors. When one of a side
succeeds in driving a feather into the opposite den, he and his
adversary retire from the game, but naturally they share the
prevailing excitement and watch every movement of their respective
sides, cheering and encouraging them to win.
When the feathers belonging to one side are all captured in a den,
the other side is conqueror.
Panama Canal
One of the company is chosen as director, and addresses the
company in some such way as this:—
“Ladies and Gentlemen,—It having been discovered by the
director of the Panama Canal Company that the water of the canal is
often disturbed to a dangerous degree by means of the passionate
sighs and turbulent emotions of the passengers cruising upon it,
they have decided that a penitentiary tax shall be levied upon all
ships containing lovers, and that, for every kiss given, toll shall be
exacted.”
The company now pass slowly before the director, who asks each
questions as to the name, destination, cargo, number and
description of passengers, and any other questions relating to
vessels which may occur to him.
No answer must contain the letter K, for this being the initial letter
of “kiss” is forbidden, and the person who uses it is obliged to pay
any forfeit demanded by the captain.
A few questions and answers might run like this:—
Captain to passing figure—
“What have you in your ship?”
“Tomatoes.”
“Where do you hail from?”
“Liverpool.”
“To which port are you sailing?”
“Boston.”
“Have you any girls on board,” &c. &c.
Of course, the captain’s aim is to force “the ships” to introduce the
letter K in their answers.
The Longest Line
This is a good competitive game. Men and boys should stand with
their feet on a chalked line. Each must stoop down to a half-sitting
position, and with the left hand resting on the knee and the right
hand inserted beneath the right leg, draw a line as long as possible
without rising or using the left hand.
Musical Buff
Station a person in each corner of the apartment. Then blindfold
one of the party, and lead him to the center.
The master of the ceremonies points to each of the four in
succession, and each says in a clear separate tone the word “Come.”
When the word has been said by each in turn, the blind man
endeavors to find his way towards the person who spoke first.
Magic Hieroglyphics
For this seemingly mysterious achievement a confederate is
required. He must know that—
A is shown by one tap, because it is the first vowel.
E „ two taps, „ „ second vowel.
I „ three taps, „ „ third vowel.
O „ four taps, „ „ fourth vowel.
U „ five taps, „ „ fifth vowel.
Consonants are revealed by means of sentences, which the wizard
speaks in a natural and unostentatious manner.
The confederate is banished from the room while the party decide
upon the word he shall be called upon to guess. Monosyllables are
preferable.
When he returns the wizard is armed with a wand, by means of
which he proceeds to make imaginary pictures on the carpet.
Supposing the word to be orange. He begins with four taps, and
the confederate, who is all attention, knows that the word begins
with the fourth vowel, O.
The wizard, flourishing his wand, remarks with extreme
innocence:
“Rather fatiguing work, as you perceive.”
The confederate says to himself R.
One tap is the next sound for A.
And some sentence such as—
“No one can imagine the mental strain,” supplies the letter N to his
alert companion.
The wizard’s query, voiced in a mocking tone,
“Getting near it?” supplies the letter G.
A few more imaginary pictures, and two taps, which represent
letter E, and the confederate with an air of profound relief wipes his
brow and declares confidently that the word is orange.
Result.—The company applaud loudly, and is thoroughly mystified.
The Auction Game
This is a most fascinating resource for a wet wintry afternoon, and
its preparations are interesting enough to keep a whole houseful of
young folk occupied and amused. A large piece of cardboard is cut
into twenty-five squares, and on each is pasted a picture of some
article taken from advertisements in old newspapers, magazines, or
catalogues. The pictures are numbered, and on the back a price in
keeping with the article is written.
The more variety there is among the stock for sale the better. It
may contain anything from a thoroughbred Persian to a set of
ninepins, and the prices may be copied from the catalogues, &c.
When this is done, a mint of paper or cardboard money is
manufactured. The range of coin corresponds to the prices of the
articles. Should the most expensive of these be marked $500, the
paper money must include that amount. Upon each disc of
cardboard is written its value.
The guests having arrived, the capital is divided among them in
equal portions. If there has been no time to manufacture the coin,
imitation money can be purchased quite cheaply, and this lends a
greater reality to the game.
The first thing is to secure an auctioneer amongst the party, who
possesses a ready flow of language, and is not troubled by shyness.
An amiable uncle, or other grown-up relative, will do capitally.
The auctioneer stands on a chair or stool, and cries out the article
before him, treating it as if it were real.
He is provided with a hammer, and the company begin an eager
bidding for the thing that takes their fancy.
The players, as may be expected, are as anxious as people in a
real auction to obtain what they covet at the lowest price possible.
Should a member offer more than he is able to pay, and succeed
in being the last to name the highest price, he pays a forfeit of ten
cents to each of the other buyers, and the article is again placed on
the auctioneer’s table.
The winner is the individual who has got the best value for his
money, and has the most capital in hand by the time the twenty-five
articles are sold.
It is a good plan to offer prizes—a good one for the discreet and
careful buyer, and a “booby” for the poor foolish spendthrift, who
has nothing to show at the end of the game.
Excitement and eagerness are increased by the cry of the
auctioneer, “Going, going, gone!” and the beat of his hammer.
If he is able to introduce funny narratives concerning the articles
into his harangue, so much the better.
For instance, a pair of boots, fashioned from the corpse of the
King of Prussia’s pet calf, and the black kid gloves which King
Charles II. wore at the funeral of his great-aunt; the mouse-trap that
once held prisoner a rodent of aristocratic lineage and purple blood;
the ash-tray, into which the burnt cigar of Peter the Great is
supposed to have fallen—all should go at a high price.
The Whistle
Another excellent game is played in the following manner.
One of the company is blindfolded, and a long ribbon, through
which is threaded a whistle, is pinned to his back, and he is told that
he must catch the blower and discover the whistle.
Of course, he has no idea that it is on his own person.
He is swung into the center of the room, and his playmates make
surreptitious dives at the whistle and raise it to their lips, taking care
not to stretch the ribbon so that he will feel the tug.
Perfect silence should be maintained by those eddying round him;
they move on tip-toe, with bated breath, but now and then sounds
of stifled laughter are heard.
The “blind” man seeks high and low for the possessor of the
whistle, his ears strained to catch the direction of the sound. He may
succeed in embracing a youth or damsel, but his search round her
neck, waist, or in her fingers for the missing whistle is futile.
It will be long ere he guesses the secret, if he ever does, and the
delight of young and old at his expense is hilarious.
The Blind Brothers
All who are unfamiliar with this mysterious game are banished
from the room and brought in separately.
The master of ceremonies blandly invites each to be seated on
one of two chairs placed back to back and touching each other; the
other chair is occupied by one of the initiated in the performance. A
sheet is thrown over the couple, and round them circle those of the
guests who are aware of what is to happen.
One of the two blind men, the confederate, is secretly armed with
a light roll of paper.
To the strains of the pianoforte, the other players march round.
Suddenly the individual who has been brought in feels a light tap on
his head; he should at once cry out to his companion—
“Brother, I’m balked.”
The confederate immediately replies, “Who balked you?”
The other tries vainly to guess.
Presently his companion bangs his own head, and wails in
distress—
“Brother, I’m balked,” and the other replies—
“Who balked you?”
It is long before the guileless brother guesses that the assault
comes from the arm of his relative lifted out of the sheet.
Should he fail to do so in a given time, another victim is called in
to take his place; he joins the circle moving round the chairs, and
sees for himself the manner in which the poor unsuspecting
“brother” is deceived.
The Poets’ Corner
This is an excellent and ingenious pastime for young men and
women who have outgrown the old-world games of “Hunt the
Slipper” and “Hide and Seek.”
The “poets” are each given a slip of paper and pencil, at the head
of which they write any question they like. When this is written, the
papers are folded, so that the sentence is concealed, and passed on
to the left-hand neighbor, who, without looking at the question,
writes any word she likes beneath so long as it is a noun. This is
again concealed, and passed to a third party, who must compose a
rhythm or stanza, which includes both question and noun. As these
have no relation to each other, some ingenuity is needed to link the
two in a verse.
For example, suppose the question given is as follows:—
Question—What is the time?
Noun—Chair.
Verse.
“What is the time?” Grandfather asks,
This is one of the pleasant tasks
He sets the children from his chair.
And round eyes at the timepiece stare.
Little Alice reads the time—
The old clock helps her, and chimes out nine.
Or—
Question—What is your age?
Noun—Cigar.
Verse.
Cigar, cigar,
What is your age?
Wrinkled and brown,
Reserved as a sage.
Till you rest on my lip,
And the light is set
To your tip.
What is your age?
Your eye glows bright
With the spark of youth.
Come, answer with truth!
The cigar replies,
Time flies,
An hour perchance
I may live,
The ashes show
The span of my age.
I am calm philosopher,
Thoughtful sage.
Jack’s Going Strong
“Jack” is a piece of firewood, held in the flames until its tip glows.
It is then passed from hand to hand among the players. Each says,
as he receives the smoldering torch, “Jack’s going strong.” The aim
is to get rid of “Jack” before the spark dies. The player, who is
obliged to own that “Jack is dead,” is compelled to pay a forfeit.
“Jack” should be a long stick, held out at arm’s length, so that, if
he falls by accident, he will not burn holes in party dresses. The floor
should be without a carpet. There is much fun and excitement to be
gleaned from this simple game, as no one wishes to have “Jack’s”
corpse on their hands.
Name Divinations
This is a clever puzzle game, which seems to the beholder to be
steeped in magic and mystery. In order to discover the name or
birthplace of a person, the following table of five columns is
necessary:—
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5)
A B D H P
C C E I Q
E F F J R
G G G K S
I J L L T
K K M M U
M N N N V
O O O O W
Q R T X X
S S U Z Y
U V V Y Z
W W W
Y Z
The manipulator shows the table to the individual whose name he
wishes to discover, asking him to point out the column or columns
that contain the initial letter. A glance at the table will show that if it
is in only one column it must be the top letter. Should it be found to
be in more than one, it is discovered by adding the first letters of the
columns in which it is stated to be, the sum supplying the
alphabetical position of the letter. For example, take the name
Elizabeth.
Elizabeth glances at the table and looks for the columns in which
her initial letter occurs. It is obvious that she must be careful not to
overlook its repetition. She informs you that it is to be found in
columns 1 and 3. Now, the columns mentioned are topped by the
letters A and D, which are the first and fourth letters of the alphabet.
Add these together and you get 5. E is the fifth letter. In case you
forget it, write it on a slip of paper. The next letter, Elizabeth informs
you, occurs in columns 3 and 4. These are headed by D and H = 4 +
8 = 12. The twelfth letter is L. Columns 1 and 4 contain I, headed by
A and H = 1 + 8 = 9. The ninth letter is I. Z is found in columns 2
and 4 and 5, headed by B, H and P = 2 + 8 + 16 = 26. The twenty-
sixth letter is Z. The next letter exists only in column No. 1, therefore
it is A. The next letter exists only in column No. 2, therefore it is B.
The next letter exists only in columns 1 and 3. The top letters of
these, A and D = 1 + 4 = 5. The fifth letter is E.
T is found in columns 3 and 5. Top letters D and P = 4 + 16 = 20.
The twentieth letter is T.
H occurs in column 4, therefore it is the top letter, H.
Result—Elizabeth.
Wizard Photography
The wizard, who possesses a confederate, is banished from the
room. During his absence the latter produces a piece of paper, and
declares his intention of taking a photograph of any individual
among the company upon it, in such a manner that it shall be visible
to the wizard alone, who, upon examining it closely, will call out the
name of the original.
Naturally every one considers that this must be quite an
impossible proceeding, and for that reason every one becomes very
curious and watchful, making up his mind to discover the trick.
The confederate fixes upon one of the company, poses her to his
satisfaction, tells her not to look grave, &c., just as professional
photographers do, and when she is quite ready and gazing at the
sheet of paper, which is held out in the manipulator’s left hand, he
passes his right over it, snaps his fingers, and tells her that the
wonder is accomplished.
He hastens to wrap the “plate” in his handkerchief, and, calling in
the wizard, hands it to him, retiring to a seat where the latter can
observe him without appearing to do so. The wizard, looking very
mysterious and wise, bids the company maintain an unbroken
silence, while he unwraps and examines the “plate.”
His confederate, meanwhile, imitates as nearly as possible the
position of the original of the photograph.
Should she cross her feet, toss back her hair, rest her chin on her
hand, or perform any other trivial action, the confederate does the
same, quite naturally so as not to rouse any suspicion or notice. All
attention being concentrated on the wizard, his actions will not be
observed by any one save the manipulator, who is led by the
position he assumes to guess the individual whose likeness on the
“plate” is supposed to be visible to him alone.
Few would realize, until they try the game, the wonder and
admiration of the guests, for the wizard who successfully achieves
his purpose, and the means employed, are seldom, if ever,
discovered.
The Missing Ring
A plain curtain ring is threaded through a piece of tape or ribbon,
knotted at the ends. The guests form a circle round a central figure.
The ring is passed swiftly along through hands gripping the tape,
while the master of ceremonies counts one, two.
At three, all fists must be threaded by the tape and perfectly
motionless, and the man in the center, who is permitted to observe
the circuit of the ring, is called upon to say which person has
possession of it. Should he guess rightly, he changes places with the
individual.
Apples and Nuts
Mix a number of hazel nuts and apples together on a table
removed from the wall; hand a teaspoon and table knife to each of
the guests. Bid them, at a given signal, move to the table, with the
knife in the right hand, the spoon in the left, and scoop up one apple
and one nut. This is no easy matter on a smooth surface, for the
probability is that the fruit and nuts will roll to the floor.
When they are secured they must be conveyed to a dish at the
other end of the room. He who performs this feat successfully the
most times wins, and the apples and nuts are awarded him as a
prize.
Amiable Dog
The party is divided into two lines. The first player begins by
saying, “Our little dog is amiable.” The first player on the opposite
side must answer quickly with another adjective beginning with the
same letter thus, “Our little dog is artful.” Meanwhile, the first player
counts ten. If in that time his opponent fails to respond he is obliged
to go over to the opposite rank. Other letters of the alphabet may be
used. The side that gains all the “men” wins.
CHAPTER LX
PARLOR TRICKS AND PUZZLES
Tangrams
One of the oldest and most fascinating puzzles comes, like so
many quaint things, from the Far East where, over four thousand
years ago, a learned Chinaman named Tan made the invention
which forty centuries have been unable to improve or alter. Worthy
of a civilization that invented Chess, Tan’s puzzle has lived on
unchanged through the ages, affording amusement and thought to
men of such ability as Napoleon, who, during his exile on St. Helena,
used to spend hour after hour with the little black geometric figures.
Fig. 1.—Showing dotted lines Fig. 2.—Showing square
marked off for black pieces in dissected and numbered for
tangram puzzle. tangrams.
Take a perfect square of stiff cardboard of any size, say five
inches, and see that the angles and sides are true. Now, very
carefully mark it off according to the dotted lines in Fig. 1, which
may be explained thus. ABCD is the square. Rule a line from B to C,
and mark off M and H halfway between B and D and C and D
respectively, and join M and H. Find G the midpoint of MH and join
AG. Mark K and F, midpoints of CE and EB respectively, and join KH
and FG. Having thus marked out the card, take a very sharp knife
and cut the cardboard along the dotted line. You will then have the
seven pieces as shown in Fig. 2, which are numbered for
convenience sake. Having colored these pieces dead black with India
ink on both sides, you are ready to start the great Tangram Puzzle.
Fig. 3.—Showing original Tan Fig. 3a.—Showing how Tan can
presenting puzzle to his wife. be fitted together.
All these seven pieces must be fitted against each other, never
overlapping, in order to make the figures of men, beasts, houses, or
the like.
Take for example Fig. 3, which shows the original Tan presenting
the puzzle. Fig. 3a shows how the good gentleman can be fitted
together, as the numbers designate which pieces are to be placed
against each other.
Fig. 4.—Showing pieces fitted Fig. 4a.—Showing how pieces are
together to represent figure in cocked placed for figure in cocked hat.
hat.
Fig. 5.—Representation of Fig. 5a.—Showing construction of
depressed cat. pieces for representation of
depressed cat.
Fig. 6.—Lady holding her skirts Fig. 6a.—Showing pieces fitted for
high. representation of lady holding up
her skirts.
The individual in the cocked hat who appears in Figs. 4 and 4a, is
another example of how the pieces are to be put together; similarly
the depressed cat in Figs. 5 and 5a, or the lady in Figs. 6 and 6a,
who is holding her skirts up so high as she crosses the street. Figs.
6b and 6c show a gentleman apparently tired of life.
These seven pieces can be so disposed as to make hundreds of
figures, giving scope for boundless ingenuity and skill.
A good winter evening competition can be arranged by making
several sets of Tangram pieces, and distributing one set to each
member of the party. The name of some familiar object should then
be announced (for example—horse—cat—washerwoman), two
minutes being allowed for construction, and points given to the best
Tangram.
Fig. 6b.—The gentleman tired Fig. 6c.—Showing means
of life. whereby depressed gentleman
is represented.
A variation can be introduced by taking a well-known nursery
rhyme or fairy tale, and asking each person to make a Tangram to
represent a different subject in the tale. Supposing “The Farmer’s
Boy” to be the rhyme, one person would make the figure of that
youth, to another would fall the horse, to a third the dog, and so on.
As in the former case a prize might be awarded to the most
successful manipulator of the little black pieces.
A Scissor Trick
Ask one of the ladies, who naturally knows all about scissors, to
do the following trick. Holding the hands with palms upward, hang a
pair of scissors on the little fingers, as shown in Fig. 7. The fingers
should then be slightly bent so that the scissors stick upright as in
Fig. 8; next ask her to turn the hands round rapidly back to back
when the scissors will make a complete revolution, and should finally
point upward again. But it is just at this point that the trick comes in,
for the fair lady will find that instead of the scissors pointing up to
the ceiling, they are directed down to the floor! (Fig. 9.)
Fig. 7.—How to hold the scissors. Fig. 8.—Showing fingers slightly bent
and scissors sticking upright.
Fig. 9.—Position of
scissors after complete
revolution.
This is the occasion for you to show how really clever you are, and
by bearing the following hints in mind it will prove a very easy
matter.
When the hands are in the position of Fig. 8, take care that the
rings of the scissors are passed over the last joints of the little
fingers only, so that a complete revolution can take place between
the palms of the hands and the fingers themselves. To bring the
scissors upright will then follow in the natural course of events.
Blowing through a Bottle
Can you blow hard enough to make your breath pass right
through a thick glass bottle? The majority of people will say “No,”
and dare you to perform the task. It is really very easy.
Take a large round bottle or jam jar, and place a lighted candle
behind it, as in Fig. 10. Now stand so that the bottle or jar is
interposed between yourself and the light, and blow. The flame will
be extinguished at once!
There is scarcely need to tell your surprised friends that the shape
of the bottle has really caused your breath to follow the curve of the
two sides, unite at the back, and blow out the light.
Welcome to our website – the ideal destination for book lovers and
knowledge seekers. With a mission to inspire endlessly, we offer a
vast collection of books, ranging from classic literary works to
specialized publications, self-development books, and children's
literature. Each book is a new journey of discovery, expanding
knowledge and enriching the soul of the reade
Our website is not just a platform for buying books, but a bridge
connecting readers to the timeless values of culture and wisdom. With
an elegant, user-friendly interface and an intelligent search system,
we are committed to providing a quick and convenient shopping
experience. Additionally, our special promotions and home delivery
services ensure that you save time and fully enjoy the joy of reading.
Let us accompany you on the journey of exploring knowledge and
personal growth!
ebookball.com